January 18, 2025 • 21 mins
(Welcome to our new podcast! We are dropping 4 episodes initial but stay tuned for a weekly release every Friday.)
What happens when two completely different worlds collide in the chaos of family life and entrepreneurship? We, Ben and Liz, invite you to join our journey as we blend our different upbringings—one from a single-parent home facing financial struggles, the other from a stable middle-class household—and manage the whirlwind that is our family, complete with six kids, two businesses, homeschooling, eight chickens, and two dogs. Celebrating two decades of marriage, we share the humorous origins of our podcast name, "One Blessed Mess," and reflect on the challenges and sacrifices that come with blending such diverse lives. Our story is one of laughter, love, and leaning into the beautiful chaos that defines our family.
Ever found yourself using KY Jelly to keep bows in place on a bald baby's head? Liz did, and it’s just one of the quirky entrepreneurial adventures we explore in this episode. From creative beginnings to successful ventures in direct sales, Liz shares her journey of innovation, challenges, and achievements, including earning multiple cars. Meanwhile, Ben talks about his own career shift from art to programming, illustrating the unique entrepreneurial paths we've taken within our household. We discuss these transitions and the impeccable timing of life changes, all while emphasizing the role of faith in guiding us through the messiness of life.
Discover how we find redemption in our mess and allow faith to transform challenges into opportunities. We delve into personal stories of balancing entrepreneurship with family life, and how letting go of control can lead to unexpected blessings. Through scripture and candid conversation, we highlight the importance of finding God in the chaos, encouraging you to embrace your own beautiful mess. As we wrap up this episode, we extend a message of hope and encouragement, inviting you to join us on this journey and share in our candid discussions—because if God can bless our mess, He can bless yours too.
Your Listening to our 1 blessed mess, with ben and liz
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Ben (00:00):
All right, welcome to our one blessed mess.
Liz (00:10):
Also known as our 1BM.
That's the acronym.
What do you say?
How do you say it?
Ben (00:16):
No O1BM.
Liz (00:17):
O1BM Is the acronym.
Ben (00:19):
But our 1BM is kind of a little bit of a potty humor joke
.
Liz (00:23):
Because potty humor runs in our family.
It's like if there's going tobe a joke somehow.
Ben (00:29):
Well, it's my fault.
I never grew out of the pottyhumor phase.
It was definitely just acharacter deficiency and Liz
married me anyways, so she kindof inherited that.
But now the kids think it'shilarious, and so bathroom humor
, unfortunately.
Liz (00:46):
Yeah Well, I didn't know that it was on the dotted line.
When I said I do, I had no ideathat that was going to be a
part of it it was part of thefine print.
Actually it was there, it wasjust fine print okay, we didn't
mean to start this podcast offwith talking about our bms, but
since we're talking, about kindof on brand it's kind of on
brand, true, but since we'retalking about it's kind of on
brand.
It's kind of on brand, true, butsince we're talking about our
(01:07):
one blessed mess.
This is Ben and Liz, and we areso excited to be here with you.
This is a brand new podcast andwe're going to be talking about
our story of raising six kidsin eight years, managing an
entrepreneurial home with twobusinesses, homeschooling and
currently navigating life withhow many teenagers?
Ben (01:26):
Four teenagers at the moment and there's about to be
another one, so five very shortfive, you guys, five teenagers.
Liz (01:33):
We will receive all the prayers.
We need all the prayers.
It's definitely interesting.
Ben (01:38):
It's like highs and lows oh , but we forgot the eight
chickens and two dogs too.
Yes, so plus eight chickens andtwo dogs for punishment, I
think well truthfully, eightchickens and two dogs, we're
just kind of gluttons, forpunishment.
Liz (01:46):
I think, Well, truthfully, to be honest, we are just trying
to keep life interesting, andso that takes us into today's
conversation.
What are we going to talk abouttoday?
Ben (01:54):
So today we're actually going to talk about my favorite
subject.
No, I'm just kidding, we'regoing to talk about us.
So here we go, we're going todive in who we are and what
we're doing and hopefullyrelating it back to kind of what
this podcast is going to beabout.
And, yeah, we're just going totie in the whole One Blessed
Mess theme.
So let's start with you, liz.
(02:17):
Who are you?
Liz (02:18):
Okay, so I'm Liz and, as you guys know, we have a lot of
kids and I came from a singleparent home.
My dad was actually analcoholic drug addict and we
grew up very, very poor.
My mom did the best she couldwith what she had, and when you
come from a broken home and abroken background, when you come
(02:40):
into a healthy marriage or wantto have a healthy marriage, it
just is a way that you have tonavigate that you've never been
before, and so you know, withgrowing up poor, we really
didn't ever have money foranything.
In fact, we used to take thetoilet paper from the church.
Yes, and anybody who's watchingthis that grew up with me will
(03:02):
be like what the heck?
But they had, like all thisextra toilet paper at the church
.
And so we, my sisters and Ithis is terrible, I should buy
the toilet paper for the church,I should go replenish, but
anyway we did, because we justdidn't have the money and we
were the family that would gothrough the checkout line at the
grocery store and have to putthings back because we didn't
(03:24):
have the finances.
And so that's a little bitabout me and how I grew up, and
you know just part of who.
I am not ashamed of it, butwe'll kind of tap into some of
that through our One Bless Mess.
How about you, ben?
Ben (03:39):
Well, I grew up very differently, so I grew up with
parents who never touchedalcohol.
Actually, um, so that was kindof crazy, but good, uh, because
it um, definitely enforced someof the right things, right
decisions.
But, uh, we weren't perfect,obviously I mean, every family
has their own issues and stuffbut I am thankful that my
(03:59):
parents didn't have anysubstance abuse and if they did,
they hit it it really well.
So this might be a time, mom anddad, for you to tell me if they
did it, they didn't, then keepgoing, keep going, okay so
anyways, um, but uh, we alsogrew up, uh, middle class and
maybe, I think, probably middleof the road middle class, not
(04:19):
upper middle class, not lowermiddle class, probably just
right in the middle, um, and soit was very different upbringing
than liz.
We, my brother and I, we neverreally had any issues with
getting anything that we needed,and then also on top of that,
like we mostly got what wewanted to.
If it was something that wereally need or, sorry, we really
(04:39):
wanted, you know, we would begfor it for Christmas or for a
birthday and we typically got it.
So it was a very differentupbringing than Liz.
So that's been unique to kindof see how that plays out with
our kids too.
Liz (04:55):
Parenting, yeah, yes, parenting, because we have two
different experiences comingtogether.
Isn't that the beauty of theLord?
He takes two different lives,he takes different and puts them
together, and it really causesyou to um sacrifice.
Ben (05:11):
I always say marriage is the place that you go to die and
then, and then kids on top ofthat are the place where you get
extra death.
I think, yeah, there's extradying.
I don't know what's more thandying, but whatever that is,
that's what happens when you getkids.
Liz (05:26):
We are dying, and so we're so excited about our One Blessed
Mess because, as we've beenjourneying and married, we've
been married for how long now,ben?
Ben (05:35):
20 years.
Liz (05:36):
Two decades.
Ben (05:37):
Yeah, we did it.
We are here 20 years.
Liz (05:39):
And we now have six kids.
Like now have six kids.
Like we said, we have eightchickens, two dogs.
Ben (05:48):
Um, we have two businesses and we also have what you want
and a half boats one and a halfboats, one and a half, but and
there's a lot of stories behindthat half um, because one of
them is currently not functional, but we'll talk about that on
another podcast.
It's really funny, uh, wealmost dredged it up from the
bottom of a lake and on top ofthat I almost ran over friend.
So there's lots of good actionon that story, but that'll have
(06:09):
to be another episode, I think.
Liz (06:11):
Actually, we were in the boat while I was sinking you
guys, so you'll have to checkback in on another podcast.
Ben (06:18):
And don't let the boats fool you.
These are I don't even know ifyou would really call them boats
that you and I would think ofas boats Most people think of as
boats, because these are likebudget boats.
We'll just say that, yeah, verybudget.
Liz (06:34):
Very budget because we live on a budget, because we have
such a large family.
But we made it.
We're here and we have plans tostay above water, so to speak.
Ben (06:46):
That's right.
We want to stay above water,that's right.
Liz (06:48):
Yeah, no more sinking.
Yeah, no more sinking.
So just jumping into ourentrepreneurial journey.
My entrepreneurial journeybegan when I had my first
daughter and she was bornwithout any hair, so she was a
bald little girl, and everyonekept saying, oh, what a sweet
little boy, what a sweet littleboy.
And I'm thinking she's dressedin pink, all these things.
(07:08):
I would put those headbands onher and then take them off and
there's like those lines in herhead and I just felt so bad for
her and she'd pull them off, andso I got the idea to start
putting little bows that I wasmaking on her head and I began
with K-Row syrup and that kindof became a problem.
And the reason why that becamea problem is because the bees
(07:30):
would come around buzzing aroundher head.
Not kidding, they wereattracted to the scent.
Ben (07:34):
What's Cairo syrup?
Cairo syrup is For everybodywho doesn't know.
Liz (07:37):
It's like, I don't know, it's like syrup, but it's clear.
Ben (07:41):
I don't really it's like sweet right, it's super sweet,
yeah, and very sticky, sticky,and that was a problem too,
because why?
Liz (07:49):
Oh, massive problem.
Because when I would go this isterrible when I would go and
take the bow off of her head, itwould pull the few hairs that
she had off her head.
And then it's even worse thanthat.
You couldn't get it off becauseit was like glued, like candy
glued to her head.
This sounds terrible.
So then I would become like amother cat and start licking her
(08:11):
head.
This sounds terrible.
So then I would become like amother cat and start licking her
head.
Ben (08:15):
We don't do that now.
Liz (08:16):
We don't do that now.
She's 16.
She would have my head yeah.
Yeah, it's not, she's one ofthose teenagers, but anyway, I
would do that to get the littlebow off.
Well, one day we were outshopping and I had all the kids
and this NICU nurse came up tome.
She's like, oh, a little girl.
I'm like, oh, finally somebodynotices and she says, oh, are
you using KY, jelly?
(08:37):
And I said, excuse me.
She says KY, and I said what doyou mean?
And she goes to keep stoplaughing, stop laughing.
She says to keep the bow on herhead.
And I was like what she goes?
Seriously, we do this in theNICU when little babies are born
.
We take just a little bit of KY, about a pea size, you put the
(08:57):
bow on there and it will stayall day.
And so I got the courage up todo it and, you guys, it worked.
It really, really worked.
And it made for some awkwardconversations when Ben would go
and drop her off at the.
Ben (09:13):
Sunday school check-in yeah , so what are you using to keep
that bow on?
I'd rather not say it's sofunny.
Liz (09:22):
It's so funny.
So it was so awkward becauseyou know, like as she got older
she was still bald and so youlike bring her like sippy cup,
you know, and as he's diggingfor the sippy cup, he's like
hold on, and there's the KY delithat I kept in her diaper bag
to keep the bows on her head onthe way to church, anyway.
So that kind of started gettinga little popular with my
friends.
So I'm making all these bowsand I'm thinking, all right,
(09:44):
this is going to be a greatbusiness opportunity.
And what ended up happening waswe were pregnant again.
Imagine that.
We're always either nursing orpregnant.
At least I was in those years.
Well, you weren't nursing orpregnant, I mean.
Ben (09:57):
I tried, it just didn't work.
Yeah, that's another podcast.
Liz (10:00):
We won't talk about that here.
That's a terrible story, okay,but anyway.
And so I started gettingpopular.
But it was me, I was pregnant,had sharp scissors, all these
little kids running around andit was just me making those bows
.
And then an opportunity came tome to start a business with
direct sales.
(10:21):
And I did, I did it and carriedthat on, laid the bow business
aside and carried on A thrivingbow business.
Ben (10:30):
A thriving, Maybe not Well.
Liz (10:32):
I mean it was gaining popularity, literally.
Ben (10:35):
So we looked at the insurance that we needed.
Liz (10:37):
Oh yeah, that part was a little crazy.
Like I was like, yeah, we'renot going to do that, so we just
didn't have the finances to doit.
But anyway, and so laid thatdown and picked up the other
business direct sales and becamevery successful actually a
six-figure business.
Ben (10:53):
Tell them how many cars you ended up earning.
Liz (10:55):
Well, quite a few.
But the bigger part of it isthat I felt the Lord tell me
about a year and a half ago tolay it all down.
And so I've walked away fromthat and have been in this
season of a four-letter word.
That's very hard for achievershe's laughing because he knows
(11:16):
he's been with me on thisjourney and it's R-E-S-T.
Rest, and just like what do youwant me to do, lord?
What do you want me to do?
And so, through the waiting,another four-letter word, wait,
w-a-i-t.
A lot has come up and werealized, like okay.
(11:37):
The timing was impeccable Wasimpeccable.
And we'll be unpacking that inanother podcast, but there's a
lot to talk about in that andit's just been a beautiful
journey, really beautifuljourney.
So Entrepreneurial Home and Benhas an entrepreneur story.
Yeah, so my just been abeautiful journey, really
beautiful journey.
So Entrepreneurial Home and Benhas an entrepreneur story.
Ben (11:53):
Yeah, so my journey is a little different.
I didn't get into Bose, believeit or not, but I did start out
with a degree in art and thenended up becoming a programmer.
But along the way I had thiskind of crazy journey.
I was in Kansas City and I wasworking as an art director for a
(12:15):
marketing firm and there were afew other stops before then.
I was doing some work at aministry and doing kind of what
we called a webmaster position.
We don't really use that wordanymore.
It's not PC anymore.
Liz (12:29):
No, it's not.
Ben (12:29):
But anyways.
So I'm here at this marketingfirm and it's going, I would say
, fairly well.
I was working really long hoursbut I enjoyed the work.
Problem was is just the kidsand Liz didn't really see me
very often.
So we were kind of strugglingwith the fact that like I was
putting in the hours but notputting in the hours but not
(12:51):
putting in the hours at homelike I needed to be.
Liz (12:53):
Yeah, I was becoming a single parent and we had a good
conversation and that was rightabout when our son got his
diagnosis of autism and I cameto you and I said, hey, I did
not sign up to be a singleparent.
I grew up in a single parenthome.
I know what that's like.
So we got to figure this outand we began to pray.
Yep, we did.
And guess what God did?
Ben (13:13):
Yeah, we prayed about it and it was really kind of
strange because things wereactually kind of falling apart
at work.
Like I got brought in and puton probation because the
leadership at the time said myheart wasn't in the work and it
was crazy because I was spendingmore hours.
It felt like I was spendingmore hours at work than I was at
(13:33):
home.
Liz (13:37):
No, you actually were.
That's actually true.
I'm going to pause for just asecond.
You were going extra early inthe morning and you were staying
way past 7.30, 8 o'clock atnight.
And there were seasons that thekids didn't even see him because
he was working so much, but yetyour heart wasn't in it, and
that is a telltale sign oftransition.
You were in transition, butyou're loyal, you're faithful,
you don't want to give up.
You're going to be there tillthe end, which is one of the
(13:58):
things I absolutely love aboutyou.
But you were in transition andwe just didn't know where the
direction was.
Ben (14:03):
No, it was pretty crazy because right before this I had
met someone working with one ofour clients at the marketing
firm and she was a contractor.
This person that I met, she wasan older lady, I would say
probably in her late 50s at thistime, and we kind of met in a
(14:23):
little bit of a situation.
So I I actually was liketelling her, hey, like we can do
this thing.
And she came back and said, no,we can't.
And so there was like a littlebit of a tiff and we ended ended
up figuring out that there wasa little bit of truth on both
sides of things.
So we stayed in touch and whileshe was staying in touch with
me, she was actually trying togive me some extra work.
So I basically found myself inthe situation where she was
(14:45):
wanting to give me this job.
That was about half my salary.
Liz (14:48):
Okay, guys, stop for just a second Half salary.
Ben (14:53):
Huge yeah, but it required me to put in a solid about three
to four weeks of work, andthat's probably what I was going
to be doing exclusively.
So I was like, well crap, ifI'm going to do this, I'm gonna
take this opportunity.
Then I'm kind of going to leavethe marketing firm I was
working for high and dry.
(15:13):
So I told her no.
And then guess what happened?
She said yes.
Liz (15:17):
And I was like wait a minute.
Ben (15:18):
I thought you asked me the question if I wanted to do this
work.
And she was like you're justgoing to do it.
Don't worry, you'll fill it in,you'll find time to do it.
And oh, by the way, if we canget it done in two weeks, that
would be better.
Liz (15:31):
And you did.
Ben (15:32):
Somehow it worked out.
She wouldn't take no for ananswer, which was crazy, and and
then I ended up doing the joband getting paid and it was just
like life changing.
We were like, man, what isgoing on About?
That same time, one of myfriends came up to me and said
hey, man, you know, I justreally feel like this is from
the Lord, but I feel like you'regoing to leave your job at the
(15:56):
three year mark.
And lo and behold, he didn'teven know how long I was there,
but it was.
It was in the three years I wasthere but it was in the three
years.
I was in the three years.
I was about three years threemonths and this lady, she comes
out of the woodwork and it wasjust crazy.
It was a crazy circumstance.
Her name, her last name, wasMiracle.
Liz (16:13):
Yeah, I'll give her first name.
Ben (16:15):
I don't want to call anybody out, but her last name
was Miracle, and so that wasanother.
Like wow, what in the world isgoing on here?
I know.
Liz (16:21):
So it's our miracle story, and that threw you into
entrepreneurship.
Ben (16:31):
It did, yeah, threw me into entrepreneurship.
I realized that this washappening and all I needed to do
was basically sign off on it.
The Lord had called me intothis journey and it was
happening, even though I wasn't100 hundred percent aware.
So I just I basically quit.
And day one I was busy, and ithasn't really stopped.
Liz (16:47):
No, it hasn't stopped.
And you got your main clientsand you work on very important
websites which we can't sharethe names of them, but you, you
do really amazing work and youguys he has sought out and it's
so neat.
I think the biggest thing isthat, yes, we're a dual and
entrepreneurial home, but wekind of have different stories,
(17:08):
but it's just having that faithand stepping out and we're going
to unpack that in some otherpodcasts.
We can't do that today becausethis is about us, we're just
sharing about us, but we are sothankful that our God is a
redeemer, don't you agree, ben?
Ben (17:23):
Yeah, he is and, like you know, there was a bit of a mess
at work and I just I wasn'tputting in the right priorities.
And, you know, god used thatwhole situation and gave me a
way out and he wrote our storyfor us, like all I had to do was
just follow him, you know, justa few little steps, and so I'm
super grateful that you know Godis a God who redeems and he
(17:44):
takes broken things, he takesmesses, and I mean I've
witnessed it countless times inmy life, you know, even recently
.
You know God is like so good atpicking us back up and putting
us back together, and so that'swhat we want to kind of share
throughout this podcast is ourmess, and we want to just kind
of like not air our dirtylaundry, but pretty close to
that, because we have a lot oflaundry and there's a lot of
(18:06):
mess.
Liz (18:07):
Oh my gosh, can we talk about the laundry for just a
second?
Like we have a lot of laundry.
Now our kids do their laundryLike I'm a big proponent of that
and that has totally changedour family dynamic in this house
Also, too.
What's happened is it's madethe kids get more responsible,
but I also had to let go ofcontrol.
(18:28):
You know, like the shirts arenot going to be perfectly placed
in their drawers, et cetera, etcetera.
We don't want to get into allthat.
We'll have to do anotherpodcast on how we run our house
with a huge family.
But you know, didn't you have ascripture, ben?
Oh yeah, yeah, there's a few.
Ben (18:43):
So just to kind of correlate some of the you know,
god uses the broken and themessy and the poor and the
contrite of heart, and so one ofthe verses that kind of stuck
out to me recently is fromPsalms, and it's Psalms 119, 71.
It was good for me that I wasafflicted, that I might learn
(19:05):
your statutes.
And that's been somethingrecently just, we're
experiencing that.
And, man, when you reach out tothe Lord in the mess and reach
up to him and say, put me backtogether, like that is so
powerful, extremely powerful.
(19:25):
And one other verse that kindof is a nice little segue too is
in Isaiah 57, 15.
And I'll just read that onequickly, for this is what the
high and exalted one says he wholives forever, whose name is
holy.
I live in a high and holy place.
And this is crazy.
It's like God is telling Isaiahlike hey, I'm God, I'm high and
(19:59):
exalted, I live forever, I'mholy, I live in a high and holy
place, but, oh yeah, I also livewith the one who is contrite
and lowly in spirit.
And why?
To put them back together, torevive them, to redeem them?
This is part of God's characterand it's a central part of
God's character.
It's not something you canunderstate.
And we need that, like we needthat in our own household.
(20:22):
I need that personally.
I know Liz needs that.
Liz (20:24):
I need that, kids need that .
I definitely need it.
Ben (20:26):
Part of our blessed mess is like finding the redeemer in
the mess and our story which wewant to share, and we want to
talk about a few things too asthey come up, but we just want
to always get back to that pointof finding God in the mess and
finding our salvation, ourredemption in him and just being
open to see him put us backtogether again.
Liz (20:47):
Yes, and so, with closing, we just want to say thank you
for being a part of our OneBlessed Mess today, and don't
forget to subscribe and sharethis with your friends that you
think would be excited to hearabout a large family who talks
about bowel movements.
Apparently, lots Just kidding.
Ben (21:06):
And like sinking boats.
Liz (21:07):
Yeah, and sinking boats?
Maybe don't like sinking boats.
This is not something we should.
We should, yeah, let's not dothat one, but I don't know how
you're listening to this orwatching it, but, like Share
Heart, give the thumbs up.
However, it is becauseeverything you do subscribe
helps us with getting thismessage out, and until next time
(21:28):
, we just want to encourage youto embrace your beautiful mess,
because why, ben?
Ben (21:32):
Because God likes to put us back together.
Liz (21:35):
And if he can bless our mess, oh my gosh so can he bless
yours.
Ben (21:39):
Have a great day.
Liz (21:40):
See ya.
All right, welcome to our one blessed mess.
Liz (00:10):
Also known as our 1BM.
That's the acronym.
What do you say?
How do you say it?
Ben (00:16):
No O1BM.
Liz (00:17):
O1BM Is the acronym.
Ben (00:19):
But our 1BM is kind of a little bit of a potty humor joke
.
Liz (00:23):
Because potty humor runs in our family.
It's like if there's going tobe a joke somehow.
Ben (00:29):
Well, it's my fault.
I never grew out of the pottyhumor phase.
It was definitely just acharacter deficiency and Liz
married me anyways, so she kindof inherited that.
But now the kids think it'shilarious, and so bathroom humor
, unfortunately.
Liz (00:46):
Yeah Well, I didn't know that it was on the dotted line.
When I said I do, I had no ideathat that was going to be a
part of it it was part of thefine print.
Actually it was there, it wasjust fine print okay, we didn't
mean to start this podcast offwith talking about our bms, but
since we're talking, about kindof on brand it's kind of on
brand, true, but since we'retalking about it's kind of on
brand.
It's kind of on brand, true, butsince we're talking about our
(01:07):
one blessed mess.
This is Ben and Liz, and we areso excited to be here with you.
This is a brand new podcast andwe're going to be talking about
our story of raising six kidsin eight years, managing an
entrepreneurial home with twobusinesses, homeschooling and
currently navigating life withhow many teenagers?
Ben (01:26):
Four teenagers at the moment and there's about to be
another one, so five very shortfive, you guys, five teenagers.
Liz (01:33):
We will receive all the prayers.
We need all the prayers.
It's definitely interesting.
Ben (01:38):
It's like highs and lows oh , but we forgot the eight
chickens and two dogs too.
Yes, so plus eight chickens andtwo dogs for punishment, I
think well truthfully, eightchickens and two dogs, we're
just kind of gluttons, forpunishment.
Liz (01:46):
I think, Well, truthfully, to be honest, we are just trying
to keep life interesting, andso that takes us into today's
conversation.
What are we going to talk abouttoday?
Ben (01:54):
So today we're actually going to talk about my favorite
subject.
No, I'm just kidding, we'regoing to talk about us.
So here we go, we're going todive in who we are and what
we're doing and hopefullyrelating it back to kind of what
this podcast is going to beabout.
And, yeah, we're just going totie in the whole One Blessed
Mess theme.
So let's start with you, liz.
(02:17):
Who are you?
Liz (02:18):
Okay, so I'm Liz and, as you guys know, we have a lot of
kids and I came from a singleparent home.
My dad was actually analcoholic drug addict and we
grew up very, very poor.
My mom did the best she couldwith what she had, and when you
come from a broken home and abroken background, when you come
(02:40):
into a healthy marriage or wantto have a healthy marriage, it
just is a way that you have tonavigate that you've never been
before, and so you know, withgrowing up poor, we really
didn't ever have money foranything.
In fact, we used to take thetoilet paper from the church.
Yes, and anybody who's watchingthis that grew up with me will
(03:02):
be like what the heck?
But they had, like all thisextra toilet paper at the church
.
And so we, my sisters and Ithis is terrible, I should buy
the toilet paper for the church,I should go replenish, but
anyway we did, because we justdidn't have the money and we
were the family that would gothrough the checkout line at the
grocery store and have to putthings back because we didn't
(03:24):
have the finances.
And so that's a little bitabout me and how I grew up, and
you know just part of who.
I am not ashamed of it, butwe'll kind of tap into some of
that through our One Bless Mess.
How about you, ben?
Ben (03:39):
Well, I grew up very differently, so I grew up with
parents who never touchedalcohol.
Actually, um, so that was kindof crazy, but good, uh, because
it um, definitely enforced someof the right things, right
decisions.
But, uh, we weren't perfect,obviously I mean, every family
has their own issues and stuffbut I am thankful that my
(03:59):
parents didn't have anysubstance abuse and if they did,
they hit it it really well.
So this might be a time, mom anddad, for you to tell me if they
did it, they didn't, then keepgoing, keep going, okay so
anyways, um, but uh, we alsogrew up, uh, middle class and
maybe, I think, probably middleof the road middle class, not
(04:19):
upper middle class, not lowermiddle class, probably just
right in the middle, um, and soit was very different upbringing
than liz.
We, my brother and I, we neverreally had any issues with
getting anything that we needed,and then also on top of that,
like we mostly got what wewanted to.
If it was something that wereally need or, sorry, we really
(04:39):
wanted, you know, we would begfor it for Christmas or for a
birthday and we typically got it.
So it was a very differentupbringing than Liz.
So that's been unique to kindof see how that plays out with
our kids too.
Liz (04:55):
Parenting, yeah, yes, parenting, because we have two
different experiences comingtogether.
Isn't that the beauty of theLord?
He takes two different lives,he takes different and puts them
together, and it really causesyou to um sacrifice.
Ben (05:11):
I always say marriage is the place that you go to die and
then, and then kids on top ofthat are the place where you get
extra death.
I think, yeah, there's extradying.
I don't know what's more thandying, but whatever that is,
that's what happens when you getkids.
Liz (05:26):
We are dying, and so we're so excited about our One Blessed
Mess because, as we've beenjourneying and married, we've
been married for how long now,ben?
Ben (05:35):
20 years.
Liz (05:36):
Two decades.
Ben (05:37):
Yeah, we did it.
We are here 20 years.
Liz (05:39):
And we now have six kids.
Like now have six kids.
Like we said, we have eightchickens, two dogs.
Ben (05:48):
Um, we have two businesses and we also have what you want
and a half boats one and a halfboats, one and a half, but and
there's a lot of stories behindthat half um, because one of
them is currently not functional, but we'll talk about that on
another podcast.
It's really funny, uh, wealmost dredged it up from the
bottom of a lake and on top ofthat I almost ran over friend.
So there's lots of good actionon that story, but that'll have
(06:09):
to be another episode, I think.
Liz (06:11):
Actually, we were in the boat while I was sinking you
guys, so you'll have to checkback in on another podcast.
Ben (06:18):
And don't let the boats fool you.
These are I don't even know ifyou would really call them boats
that you and I would think ofas boats Most people think of as
boats, because these are likebudget boats.
We'll just say that, yeah, verybudget.
Liz (06:34):
Very budget because we live on a budget, because we have
such a large family.
But we made it.
We're here and we have plans tostay above water, so to speak.
Ben (06:46):
That's right.
We want to stay above water,that's right.
Liz (06:48):
Yeah, no more sinking.
Yeah, no more sinking.
So just jumping into ourentrepreneurial journey.
My entrepreneurial journeybegan when I had my first
daughter and she was bornwithout any hair, so she was a
bald little girl, and everyonekept saying, oh, what a sweet
little boy, what a sweet littleboy.
And I'm thinking she's dressedin pink, all these things.
(07:08):
I would put those headbands onher and then take them off and
there's like those lines in herhead and I just felt so bad for
her and she'd pull them off, andso I got the idea to start
putting little bows that I wasmaking on her head and I began
with K-Row syrup and that kindof became a problem.
And the reason why that becamea problem is because the bees
(07:30):
would come around buzzing aroundher head.
Not kidding, they wereattracted to the scent.
Ben (07:34):
What's Cairo syrup?
Cairo syrup is For everybodywho doesn't know.
Liz (07:37):
It's like, I don't know, it's like syrup, but it's clear.
Ben (07:41):
I don't really it's like sweet right, it's super sweet,
yeah, and very sticky, sticky,and that was a problem too,
because why?
Liz (07:49):
Oh, massive problem.
Because when I would go this isterrible when I would go and
take the bow off of her head, itwould pull the few hairs that
she had off her head.
And then it's even worse thanthat.
You couldn't get it off becauseit was like glued, like candy
glued to her head.
This sounds terrible.
So then I would become like amother cat and start licking her
(08:11):
head.
This sounds terrible.
So then I would become like amother cat and start licking her
head.
Ben (08:15):
We don't do that now.
Liz (08:16):
We don't do that now.
She's 16.
She would have my head yeah.
Yeah, it's not, she's one ofthose teenagers, but anyway, I
would do that to get the littlebow off.
Well, one day we were outshopping and I had all the kids
and this NICU nurse came up tome.
She's like, oh, a little girl.
I'm like, oh, finally somebodynotices and she says, oh, are
you using KY, jelly?
(08:37):
And I said, excuse me.
She says KY, and I said what doyou mean?
And she goes to keep stoplaughing, stop laughing.
She says to keep the bow on herhead.
And I was like what she goes?
Seriously, we do this in theNICU when little babies are born
.
We take just a little bit of KY, about a pea size, you put the
(08:57):
bow on there and it will stayall day.
And so I got the courage up todo it and, you guys, it worked.
It really, really worked.
And it made for some awkwardconversations when Ben would go
and drop her off at the.
Ben (09:13):
Sunday school check-in yeah , so what are you using to keep
that bow on?
I'd rather not say it's sofunny.
Liz (09:22):
It's so funny.
So it was so awkward becauseyou know, like as she got older
she was still bald and so youlike bring her like sippy cup,
you know, and as he's diggingfor the sippy cup, he's like
hold on, and there's the KY delithat I kept in her diaper bag
to keep the bows on her head onthe way to church, anyway.
So that kind of started gettinga little popular with my
friends.
So I'm making all these bowsand I'm thinking, all right,
(09:44):
this is going to be a greatbusiness opportunity.
And what ended up happening waswe were pregnant again.
Imagine that.
We're always either nursing orpregnant.
At least I was in those years.
Well, you weren't nursing orpregnant, I mean.
Ben (09:57):
I tried, it just didn't work.
Yeah, that's another podcast.
Liz (10:00):
We won't talk about that here.
That's a terrible story, okay,but anyway.
And so I started gettingpopular.
But it was me, I was pregnant,had sharp scissors, all these
little kids running around andit was just me making those bows
.
And then an opportunity came tome to start a business with
direct sales.
(10:21):
And I did, I did it and carriedthat on, laid the bow business
aside and carried on A thrivingbow business.
Ben (10:30):
A thriving, Maybe not Well.
Liz (10:32):
I mean it was gaining popularity, literally.
Ben (10:35):
So we looked at the insurance that we needed.
Liz (10:37):
Oh yeah, that part was a little crazy.
Like I was like, yeah, we'renot going to do that, so we just
didn't have the finances to doit.
But anyway, and so laid thatdown and picked up the other
business direct sales and becamevery successful actually a
six-figure business.
Ben (10:53):
Tell them how many cars you ended up earning.
Liz (10:55):
Well, quite a few.
But the bigger part of it isthat I felt the Lord tell me
about a year and a half ago tolay it all down.
And so I've walked away fromthat and have been in this
season of a four-letter word.
That's very hard for achievershe's laughing because he knows
(11:16):
he's been with me on thisjourney and it's R-E-S-T.
Rest, and just like what do youwant me to do, lord?
What do you want me to do?
And so, through the waiting,another four-letter word, wait,
w-a-i-t.
A lot has come up and werealized, like okay.
(11:37):
The timing was impeccable Wasimpeccable.
And we'll be unpacking that inanother podcast, but there's a
lot to talk about in that andit's just been a beautiful
journey, really beautifuljourney.
So Entrepreneurial Home and Benhas an entrepreneur story.
Yeah, so my just been abeautiful journey, really
beautiful journey.
So Entrepreneurial Home and Benhas an entrepreneur story.
Ben (11:53):
Yeah, so my journey is a little different.
I didn't get into Bose, believeit or not, but I did start out
with a degree in art and thenended up becoming a programmer.
But along the way I had thiskind of crazy journey.
I was in Kansas City and I wasworking as an art director for a
(12:15):
marketing firm and there were afew other stops before then.
I was doing some work at aministry and doing kind of what
we called a webmaster position.
We don't really use that wordanymore.
It's not PC anymore.
Liz (12:29):
No, it's not.
Ben (12:29):
But anyways.
So I'm here at this marketingfirm and it's going, I would say
, fairly well.
I was working really long hoursbut I enjoyed the work.
Problem was is just the kidsand Liz didn't really see me
very often.
So we were kind of strugglingwith the fact that like I was
putting in the hours but notputting in the hours but not
(12:51):
putting in the hours at homelike I needed to be.
Liz (12:53):
Yeah, I was becoming a single parent and we had a good
conversation and that was rightabout when our son got his
diagnosis of autism and I cameto you and I said, hey, I did
not sign up to be a singleparent.
I grew up in a single parenthome.
I know what that's like.
So we got to figure this outand we began to pray.
Yep, we did.
And guess what God did?
Ben (13:13):
Yeah, we prayed about it and it was really kind of
strange because things wereactually kind of falling apart
at work.
Like I got brought in and puton probation because the
leadership at the time said myheart wasn't in the work and it
was crazy because I was spendingmore hours.
It felt like I was spendingmore hours at work than I was at
(13:33):
home.
Liz (13:37):
No, you actually were.
That's actually true.
I'm going to pause for just asecond.
You were going extra early inthe morning and you were staying
way past 7.30, 8 o'clock atnight.
And there were seasons that thekids didn't even see him because
he was working so much, but yetyour heart wasn't in it, and
that is a telltale sign oftransition.
You were in transition, butyou're loyal, you're faithful,
you don't want to give up.
You're going to be there tillthe end, which is one of the
(13:58):
things I absolutely love aboutyou.
But you were in transition andwe just didn't know where the
direction was.
Ben (14:03):
No, it was pretty crazy because right before this I had
met someone working with one ofour clients at the marketing
firm and she was a contractor.
This person that I met, she wasan older lady, I would say
probably in her late 50s at thistime, and we kind of met in a
(14:23):
little bit of a situation.
So I I actually was liketelling her, hey, like we can do
this thing.
And she came back and said, no,we can't.
And so there was like a littlebit of a tiff and we ended ended
up figuring out that there wasa little bit of truth on both
sides of things.
So we stayed in touch and whileshe was staying in touch with
me, she was actually trying togive me some extra work.
So I basically found myself inthe situation where she was
(14:45):
wanting to give me this job.
That was about half my salary.
Liz (14:48):
Okay, guys, stop for just a second Half salary.
Ben (14:53):
Huge yeah, but it required me to put in a solid about three
to four weeks of work, andthat's probably what I was going
to be doing exclusively.
So I was like, well crap, ifI'm going to do this, I'm gonna
take this opportunity.
Then I'm kind of going to leavethe marketing firm I was
working for high and dry.
(15:13):
So I told her no.
And then guess what happened?
She said yes.
Liz (15:17):
And I was like wait a minute.
Ben (15:18):
I thought you asked me the question if I wanted to do this
work.
And she was like you're justgoing to do it.
Don't worry, you'll fill it in,you'll find time to do it.
And oh, by the way, if we canget it done in two weeks, that
would be better.
Liz (15:31):
And you did.
Ben (15:32):
Somehow it worked out.
She wouldn't take no for ananswer, which was crazy, and and
then I ended up doing the joband getting paid and it was just
like life changing.
We were like, man, what isgoing on About?
That same time, one of myfriends came up to me and said
hey, man, you know, I justreally feel like this is from
the Lord, but I feel like you'regoing to leave your job at the
(15:56):
three year mark.
And lo and behold, he didn'teven know how long I was there,
but it was.
It was in the three years I wasthere but it was in the three
years.
I was in the three years.
I was about three years threemonths and this lady, she comes
out of the woodwork and it wasjust crazy.
It was a crazy circumstance.
Her name, her last name, wasMiracle.
Liz (16:13):
Yeah, I'll give her first name.
Ben (16:15):
I don't want to call anybody out, but her last name
was Miracle, and so that wasanother.
Like wow, what in the world isgoing on here?
I know.
Liz (16:21):
So it's our miracle story, and that threw you into
entrepreneurship.
Ben (16:31):
It did, yeah, threw me into entrepreneurship.
I realized that this washappening and all I needed to do
was basically sign off on it.
The Lord had called me intothis journey and it was
happening, even though I wasn't100 hundred percent aware.
So I just I basically quit.
And day one I was busy, and ithasn't really stopped.
Liz (16:47):
No, it hasn't stopped.
And you got your main clientsand you work on very important
websites which we can't sharethe names of them, but you, you
do really amazing work and youguys he has sought out and it's
so neat.
I think the biggest thing isthat, yes, we're a dual and
entrepreneurial home, but wekind of have different stories,
(17:08):
but it's just having that faithand stepping out and we're going
to unpack that in some otherpodcasts.
We can't do that today becausethis is about us, we're just
sharing about us, but we are sothankful that our God is a
redeemer, don't you agree, ben?
Ben (17:23):
Yeah, he is and, like you know, there was a bit of a mess
at work and I just I wasn'tputting in the right priorities.
And, you know, god used thatwhole situation and gave me a
way out and he wrote our storyfor us, like all I had to do was
just follow him, you know, justa few little steps, and so I'm
super grateful that you know Godis a God who redeems and he
(17:44):
takes broken things, he takesmesses, and I mean I've
witnessed it countless times inmy life, you know, even recently
.
You know God is like so good atpicking us back up and putting
us back together, and so that'swhat we want to kind of share
throughout this podcast is ourmess, and we want to just kind
of like not air our dirtylaundry, but pretty close to
that, because we have a lot oflaundry and there's a lot of
(18:06):
mess.
Liz (18:07):
Oh my gosh, can we talk about the laundry for just a
second?
Like we have a lot of laundry.
Now our kids do their laundryLike I'm a big proponent of that
and that has totally changedour family dynamic in this house
Also, too.
What's happened is it's madethe kids get more responsible,
but I also had to let go ofcontrol.
(18:28):
You know, like the shirts arenot going to be perfectly placed
in their drawers, et cetera, etcetera.
We don't want to get into allthat.
We'll have to do anotherpodcast on how we run our house
with a huge family.
But you know, didn't you have ascripture, ben?
Oh yeah, yeah, there's a few.
Ben (18:43):
So just to kind of correlate some of the you know,
god uses the broken and themessy and the poor and the
contrite of heart, and so one ofthe verses that kind of stuck
out to me recently is fromPsalms, and it's Psalms 119, 71.
It was good for me that I wasafflicted, that I might learn
(19:05):
your statutes.
And that's been somethingrecently just, we're
experiencing that.
And, man, when you reach out tothe Lord in the mess and reach
up to him and say, put me backtogether, like that is so
powerful, extremely powerful.
(19:25):
And one other verse that kindof is a nice little segue too is
in Isaiah 57, 15.
And I'll just read that onequickly, for this is what the
high and exalted one says he wholives forever, whose name is
holy.
I live in a high and holy place.
And this is crazy.
It's like God is telling Isaiahlike hey, I'm God, I'm high and
(19:59):
exalted, I live forever, I'mholy, I live in a high and holy
place, but, oh yeah, I also livewith the one who is contrite
and lowly in spirit.
And why?
To put them back together, torevive them, to redeem them?
This is part of God's characterand it's a central part of
God's character.
It's not something you canunderstate.
And we need that, like we needthat in our own household.
(20:22):
I need that personally.
I know Liz needs that.
Liz (20:24):
I need that, kids need that .
I definitely need it.
Ben (20:26):
Part of our blessed mess is like finding the redeemer in
the mess and our story which wewant to share, and we want to
talk about a few things too asthey come up, but we just want
to always get back to that pointof finding God in the mess and
finding our salvation, ourredemption in him and just being
open to see him put us backtogether again.
Liz (20:47):
Yes, and so, with closing, we just want to say thank you
for being a part of our OneBlessed Mess today, and don't
forget to subscribe and sharethis with your friends that you
think would be excited to hearabout a large family who talks
about bowel movements.
Apparently, lots Just kidding.
Ben (21:06):
And like sinking boats.
Liz (21:07):
Yeah, and sinking boats?
Maybe don't like sinking boats.
This is not something we should.
We should, yeah, let's not dothat one, but I don't know how
you're listening to this orwatching it, but, like Share
Heart, give the thumbs up.
However, it is becauseeverything you do subscribe
helps us with getting thismessage out, and until next time
(21:28):
, we just want to encourage youto embrace your beautiful mess,
because why, ben?
Ben (21:32):
Because God likes to put us back together.
Liz (21:35):
And if he can bless our mess, oh my gosh so can he bless
yours.
Ben (21:39):
Have a great day.
Liz (21:40):
See ya.
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