In this episode, I sit down with the incredible Dr. Mary Ann Mercer — psychologist, author, and someone I’m proud to call a friend — for a deeply moving conversation about what it means to grieve before the loss even happens. Dr. Mary shares the story of her best friend Willa, who spent the last three years of her life battling a rare form of cancer. As Willa’s health slowly declined, Dr. Mary experienced a grief that started long before the final goodbye — one filled with emotional whiplash, conflicting thoughts, and moments of profound connection.
Together, we talk about anticipatory grief — how it creeps in while someone is still alive, and how emotionally exhausting it can be to keep showing up day after day for someone you love. Dr. Mary opens up about the guilt she felt when she started wishing for peace, the loneliness Willa experienced as others slowly pulled away, and the quiet power of simply sitting in silence with someone who’s suffering. It’s not always about fixing things — sometimes it’s just about being there.
Dr. Mary also shares some of the unexpected moments of beauty in Willa’s final years — including the annual “hippie parties” she was known for, and how her legacy continues to ripple outward through the people who loved her most. This conversation reminded me that grief isn’t just about endings — it’s also about presence, purpose, and honoring the time we do have. If you’ve ever watched someone fade while trying to hold them close, this one is for you.
DR. MARY'S LINKS:
WEBSITE: www.PositiveLifeAnswers.com
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/positivelifeanswers/
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/positivelifeanswers/
E-MAIL: drmercer@positivelifeanswers.com
POSITIVE LIFE ANSWERS PODCAST LINKS:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/positive-life-answers/id1653316395
https://positivelifeanswers.buzzsprout.com/
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