November 19, 2024 • 57 mins
In this thought-provoking episode of Our Life Beyond, Scott Dibben and Connie King sit down with Beth Blaisdell, founder of Budget by Beth, to explore the intersection of personal values, political action, and advocacy for women. Beth shares her journey of building financial confidence for women while championing their voices in leadership and equality.
Beth also talks about why she cast her vote for Kamala Harris, reflecting on how Harris represents the values of inclusion and progress that Beth is passionate about. From her experiences with personal trauma and resilience to her advocacy for women, Beth opens up about aligning personal beliefs with political choices and how that can create lasting change.
This episode is more than a conversation about politics—it’s about the power of women’s voices, the importance of recognizing red flags, and the role of hope in shaping a better future for everyone.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Well, hello, hello, hello. Welcome to Our Life Beyond the podcast where we explore how
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to navigate and hopefully thrive through some of life's biggest transitions. I'm your
co-host Scott Dibben and I've teamed up with my great friend and mentor Connie King to
share some stories, strategies and insights that helped us adapt to the ever-changing
seasons of our life. Whether your life transition is divorce, death of a loved one, switching
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careers, moving to a new city or just trying to figure out what the hell is next, where
with you every step of the way. But always remember we're not therapists, just fellow
travelers with a knack for finding humor in the chaos and maybe some untraditional method
of overcoming what life dishes out to us. Hopefully you'll have fun embarking on this
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journey. So now let's get started.
This episode of Our Life Beyond is proudly sponsored by Habit Coffee Company. Located
right off Highway 60 in Rogersville, Habit Coffee is more than just your average coffee
shop. They serve up delicious, scratch-made breakfast and lunch options daily. And they
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even specialize in catering local events. With their state-inspected kitchen and a passion
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Now that the construction is complete, getting to Habit Coffee is easier than ever. Thank
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new habit today.
(01:38):
Hello Connie.
Hello Scott, how are you?
I'm doing well. How are you doing today Connie?
I'm doing really good. What's going on today?
Well, I'm excited about this podcast. You're usually the one that says you're excited,
but I'm excited about this because as you know Connie, I mean politics are something
that I'm not going to say I'm as passionate as a lot of people about, but it does mean
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a lot to me. And today we're going to get to hear a different side from what we're
probably used to in Missouri. We're going to actually be talking to, I believe, someone
that is very driven towards Harris and really wants to explain the point of view, which
I'm so interested in because I believe probably half of that view I probably share at least,
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if not more. So if you don't mind, I think you have got everything we need to introduce
this guest.
Yes, I do. And I'm thrilled to introduce you to Beth Blaisdell, the founder of Budget
by Beth. Beth is a passionate entrepreneur on a mission to help women gain clarity around
their finances, overcome the emotional obstacles holding them back, and develop clear, actionable
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plans for saving and spending with confidence. Through her work, she's not only teaching
her clients how to manage their money, but also empowering them to make intentional choices
that align with their values and goals. Beth's approach is all about building financial confidence
one step at a time and helping her clients achieve financial freedom without the overwhelm.
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Whether you're looking to pay down debt, save for a big goal, or simply feel more in control
of your financial life, Beth's insights are going to be incredibly valuable. But today,
Beth's here to talk about something just a little different. In addition to her expertise
in personal finance, she's going to share her reasoning and perspective on why she
chose to support the Harris campaign. It's a fascinating conversation about aligning
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personal values with political action and how she feels this particular movement can
make a difference in the lives of everyday people, especially women. So Beth, welcome
to the show. We're excited to have you.
Well, thank you, Connie and Scott. I'm excited to be here.
Great. Well, go ahead, Scott.
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I'm going to say, how do we want to start this out, Connie? What do you think? Just
let her maybe share her backstory first?
Yeah, Beth, why don't you tell us? I have a feeling I did a big intro on your business,
but I have a feeling that that gives us a little insight into who you are. But I really
want to know your story. And so if you could kind of tell us a little bit about yourself
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and maybe how that coincides with you being more drawn to the Harris side.
Certainly. So yeah, so this story is a little bit long, but it's also very relatable to
many women who experience the same thing I do. So I wanted to kind of clarify who I
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am speaking on behalf of, which is women that are in solidarity with me that are maybe too
afraid to speak up or have spoken up and have been overlooked. Women that look past the
red flags and then give him chance after chance. So women who leave work after dark, hold their
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keys in a certain way, or have mace ready in case of an attacker. Women who are directly
or indirectly receiving messages that it is okay for someone else to touch them in a sexual
or nonsexual way when they don't want to be touched, you know, and it just keeps going
and going and going. So my story is very familiar to many of us, and this does not exclude like
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any party, any religion, any race, any age, how much money you make, it just doesn't matter.
This is from a lens of a woman. So my story, you know, it starts as a young lady when we're
in school and a boy will, you know, nudge us or a little push, just wanting to get our
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attention and seemingly innocent, but we find it just a tad bit annoying. And then they
get a little bit aggressive behavior. Maybe it's more of a bullying behavior of, you know,
they flip your hair as they're walking by you in the hallway and say, I'd like to see
what's under that shirt, or something as vulgar as, you know, come over here and sit on my
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lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up. And eventually we are like, okay,
this behavior seems wrong. I don't like it. It doesn't feel good. So us young ladies will
go to an adult woman and we'll say, you know, maybe it's someone within our school, maybe
it's someone at home and say, Hey, this is going on and I don't like it. I'm uncomfortable
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with it. And then we hear, well, when a boy picks on you, that means he likes you, just
ignore them and eventually they will stop. And so we internalize that as a sign of affection.
And that's very dangerous in my opinion. So then as time goes on, we feel like, okay,
you know, maybe they leave us alone after we ignore them or maybe not. Now if they get
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more aggressive, and we get into, you know, maybe high school. And so finally at this
point, a woman or a young lady is frustrated. And she's like, okay, enough is enough. And
she'll say something back to the boy and maybe embarrass him in front of his friends. She'll
stand up for herself. Well, then he'll come over her to her and say, say that again and
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find out what happens next and laughs and walks away. And again, this story is something
that is very familiar to me. These are things that I was told in school. So then, you know,
we get the message and it seems very harmless. But to us, it feels very wrong. It feels very
threatening. But other women, adult women are saying, oh, it's not that bad. It's not
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that big of a deal. So then we internalize that, well, maybe it isn't that big of a deal.
So I grew up in a Christian home that was non Mormon in a southern Utah town where the
dominant religion was the Church of Jesus Christ, Latter-day Saints Mormon. And since
I was soaked in religion at home in school and also in my social life, I was regularly
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fed the message of, you know, a woman's body is a temple. It is something that you need
to take care of, dress in a certain way so that you do not tempt a boy or a man. You
do not say or do anything that will cause the boy to fall into temptation. They call
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it the Jezebel spirit. And you don't put yourself in compromising situations for people to say
to you, well, you should have known better. Or, you know, or to say she's easy, quote,
unquote, easy. And so in the town that I lived in, men were held at a higher regard, at a
higher level in the image of God. And so I started to push back and be like, you know,
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what's this all about? Because women were not allowed to be a pastor of a church or
in any type of leadership. And I would get the response of, well, it goes back to Genesis.
God had created Adam. He is a man. And Eve was created from his rib. And she was created
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to be his helper. So we are here to be helpers of men. So I'm like, okay, well, as I got
older, I would hear messages like children are to be seen and not heard. So please do
not speak unless you are spoken to or asked a question. And, you know, I internalize that
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as what I have to say is not important. And then I would see women speak up and either
affect like state of fact or an opinion. And a man would say to them, no, that's not what
happened or you don't know what you're talking about with like an eye roll or a smirk. And
sometimes women would say, just try to get their message across and get frustrated and
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you know, it would come out in a certain way. And then of course, the man comes back and
says, oh, well, it must be that time of the month for you then. And then of course, at
that point, I would see just be completely shut down. So as a young girl, it was between
12 and 18, I grew up in a purity culture, which again, in Utah was something that we
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practiced, which was abstinence, waiting until marriage, you know, dress modestly. And, you
know, just those traditional genders of, you know, a man is to be the husband, a woman
is to be the wife. And you are to, you know, carry yourself in such a way. And let's see
here, I'm trying to think of purity culture is just really embracing waiting until marriage,
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waiting to save yourself for your husband. So as us young women, we were like, yeah,
you know, we were really embracing this. And we were thinking, what's going to be like,
and who is our husband going to be? Do you think it's going to be someone we go to school
with? And just feet, there's really feeling into it. And I, I just wanted to be the poster
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child for purity culture. And people knew that that was my intention to wait until marriage.
I have a quick question here, because I know a lot of purity culture comes from Mormonism,
but you were in a different religion. So do you think that actually that influence came
from the outside force? Cause I've lived in Utah too, and you know, you're 1000 people
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and you're the one non Mormon. So do you think that that message was sent to you from your
own religion? Or do you, and your own family? Or do you think that was sent to you from
the, the people around you who were Mormon? I think it was more so the Mormon religion.
Because, you know, that was, it was in school. I was going to their events. Yeah. Yeah. I
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got it. Yeah. So I was just a really embracing this. And, but what I didn't consider is that
it might not be my choice to wait. So I'm going to try not to cry, but I already told
my mom about, you know, what I was going to share. So by the time I was 17, I was seeing
a teenage boy who was a little bit older than me. And I, again, I told him I'm saving myself
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for marriage. I was very, you know, this is my boundary. I didn't know it was a boundary
at a time, but that's, this is where I stand with it. And so we were just really enjoying
each other, having a good time, you know, as young men and women do. And then one night,
we were spending some time together and he had non consensual inter horse with me. And
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I remember saying, no, several times, pushing him away. And when I realized that I couldn't
fight back, I just gave up and I blacked out or disassociated. So the next thing I remember
is waking up and he was putting his pants on and saying, you should probably go to the
bathroom. And then he took me home. And so I was really confused because of the messaging
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of, you know, if, if, if a boy falls into the temptation of a flash, that means that
you probably did something to cause it. So I thought it was my fault. And I didn't say
anything to anybody. I did not tell my mom, I did not tell anybody. And I thought, you
know, because I just thought, I had done something. I'm the easy girl now. What does
this mean? What does this mean for my salvation? You know, does what does this mean for my
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marriage? We went, I do get married someday. Then I get to school the next day. And those
bullies in a middle school knew about it. And they said, Oh, waiting till marriage, huh?
And they started laughing and walking away. And I was like, awesome. So that, you know,
he ended up moving away and, and going moving out of state. But I share this because that
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one occurrence in conjunction with the direct messaging I was getting in the home and the
town that I lived in directly affected my relationships going forward. And it affected
it, you know, in my intimacy in my first marriage, because I struggled with being able to, you
know, connect with him in that way. And, you know, eventually he gave up and ended up finding
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somebody else and leaving the marriage. And then so that incident really caused my self-esteem
to plummet. And also I had a hard time within that marriage and within the relationships
after that, being able to express myself and how I felt if, if I needed something or if
I wasn't in the argument, the words were just like stuck in my throat. And I just wanted
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to say what I wanted or I wanted to say what I didn't want. And I just couldn't get it
out. I couldn't say it. And so then I just started to cry because I was so frustrated.
So this was going on, you know, all the way through my first marriage and my second marriage.
And so finally, by the time I got to leave my second husband, I was in the home that
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I had moved into. I moved out of our home and into this home when I was sitting on my
living room couch who was late at night, which is my dog and myself. And of course, you
know, well, well, yes, I mean, we've all gone through really hard times. And so when you're
you're left alone with your thoughts and feelings, and you're just sitting there going, Oh my
gosh, you know, what, what has happened? And you're, I'm feeling shame. I'm feeling just
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all kinds of contradictory feelings. And it's all very negative. And so they're starting
to build and build and build. And I really wanted this feeling to go away because it
was too much. It was too heavy. It was too much. And I started to believe that, you know,
if I were to end my life, like nobody would miss me, not one person would miss me, even
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though I knew that wasn't true. I really believed that I just needed to end this once and for
all. And so I thought about ways to do it. I thought, you know, how can I do it? You
know, all these different ways that would be quick and efficient. I even started to
write a note. And I'm thinking, who am I writing this note to? You know, and I didn't even,
I couldn't even write any words on a page. And so finally I looked at, I looked at Bella.
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And I thought, I can't leave her. I can't leave her behind my sweet puppy. Like she's
the only, I am the only thing she has, you know, because she's a lot, she's a lot. And
then I thought, well, I mean, even if I'm like, Hey, can you take my dog? They're going to
ask me why. So I just thought, okay, I looked at her and she was the reason that I just,
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I was able to bring my emotions down and I was able to get it into a better state of
mind. And then at that point, I was like, okay, like just praying in a way, feeling all
the shame isn't working. So then I reached out to a therapist. And at that point, I
realized that I did have childhood trauma because before I did not know I had any childhood
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trauma. And she, you know, helped me see that my feelings were valid and I learned what
a boundary was and I learned about codependency, which I had. So after that, I started to talk
to other women and post on Facebook about how great I felt because I was like, Oh my
gosh, like this whole going to therapy and boundary thing is amazing. And when I was
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having these conversations with other women, I realized that we were all kind of had the
same story just in different forms. Every single woman I had talked to had had some form of
sexual, verbal or physical abuse within some kind of relationship, whether it was a parent,
whether it was a boyfriend or husband, or whether it was someone at work that would,
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you know, maybe pat them on the butt or tease and say, you know, if you don't need that
din length, and you know, you could go ahead and make it up on other ways. And so these
women were just like, well, you know, boys will be boys or, you know, you know how men
are just in a very passive tone. And I was like, Okay, that just doesn't sit well with
me. And then I remember while working at consumer credit counseling, I would teach women about
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personal finance at Harmony house and I heard their stories. And I saw myself, I saw myself
in these women. And it was really difficult, because, you know, they were just trying to,
you know, get by and they were, it was the same message, you know, how men can be, they
were bypassing the red flags, they were just not believing in themselves, you know, they
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bypass the red flags and gave all of us do not just these women, every woman, it seems
that we are just bypassing the red flags, excusing this bad behavior because quote
unquote, it's not that bad. And then we end up, some of us end up in abusive or deadly
situations or we meet a man online. And if we say, you know, I don't really want to go
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forward with this, some of them feel rejected. And, you know, harass us online, or, you know,
if we did go on a date with them, they will just, you know, some of them get very angry.
And so it's, but you don't know who that is until you really understand what a red flag
means and also how to recognize a green flag. So, okay, so why it bothered me that we have
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President-elect Trump is because all of those reasons, but also, you know, the 34 felonies,
the, you know, microphones, sexual innuendo, you know, little to no consequences. And that
sends a message to these men that look up to him or these bullies that I went to school
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with, that it is okay to treat a woman in this way or say things to a woman, even if
at home, the mom or the dad is saying, you know, it is not okay, you need to respect
women. And this is what that looks like. But because we hear President Trump or elect President
Trump say that lying Kamala is being exposed as the dummy every time she does a show, when
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he says they put her in and somehow a woman, somehow she's doing better than the president.
And the VP Vance says we are run by a bunch of miserable cat ladies, miserable childless
cat ladies and childless people shouldn't be allowed to be in government. And then when
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they got pushed back, he says, I have nothing against cats. So then the day after the president
gets elected, I see on my Facebook page, your body, my choice. Men are posting your body,
my choice. Men are posting a picture of President Trump with a picture of Kamala and Hillary
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saying he beat two women publicly and got away with it. I'm just like, okay, it really
just put me in a complete tailspin. So I have an analogy that you can kind of tell how I
felt the day after the election. So the analogy is this, imagine you're a young person and
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you aspire to climb Mount Everest. And so you train. You train your body, you eat healthy,
you buy the clothes, you buy the equipment, you, you know, the boots, whatever you have
to buy to climb Mount Everest, you, you train, you tell everybody about your dream, you think
about it constantly, and you just really feel it. It's in your body and you're so excited
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about climbing this mountain and, you know, you get to adulthood and now the day has come
that you're finally able to climb Mount Everest. So you're excited, you have hope, you have
courage, you have fear, you know, all those emotions that we feel when we're doing something
that is, is challenging, that is hard. And so you start to climb and you climb and you're
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just so proud of yourself and it feels so good. And you have obstacles. And so you, you
almost get to the top of that mountain. You can feel it. You can see it. You're just like,
oh my gosh, I am almost there. And then I've nowhere. Someone just pushes you all the way
down the mountain. Just pops up nowhere and pushes you down and you fall and you fall
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and you fall and you get to the bottom and you're lying on the ground and you look up
and you're like, do I want to try this again? Do I want to eventually get up and try this
again? Or do I want to fold my tent and say, I can't do this? So I completely understand
that people vote for different reasons. I understand that people, you know, there are
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some people that just are very loyal to Republican Party. They, they are the Republican Party
so, or the Democrats. So that's how they are going to vote no matter what. I also know
that some people vote because they're tired of the high cost of living or they're worried
about the rug being pulled out from under them. Or, you know, maybe some people just
aren't paying attention and they're just going to vote forever. They, you know, feel like
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voting. Some people told me that they didn't vote for either party just because they didn't
like either one of them. And some of us see the larger picture and what that vote really
means to different people. So I was very confused why 50% of America voted for the president
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elect. Yeah. And so, but I remembered I was having conversations with people who and still
do who are Trump supporters, Trump followers. And they were saying things to me like he
is going to solve my problem. And this is the fear I have. And he is going to make sure
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that my fear is going to be solved. And he, his party encouraged them to only watch Fox
News because the mainstream media is painting them in a different light and not telling
the full story. And some of the people that I talked to truly believe that he is going
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to solve these massive problems. He is going to remove the quote unquote trash. He is going
to make America great again. And they are willing to look past his behavior because
they believe that he is going to make these major problems change like these, he is going
to change these, these issues. And it's different this time, but Beth, it's different this time.
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And so this morning I woke up and it was so clear inside my mind. It is like when one
of our friends is in a toxic relationship and they break up, they get back together,
they break up. And every single time he or she says it's different this time. But everyone
else knows that it isn't. And I realized why that was the case. But I was extremely disappointed
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because of the way I viewed Kamala. So do you want me to go into why I voted for Kamala?
Sure. Yes.
Okay. So the reason I voted for Kamala is, again, I believe in equality. I believe in
protecting rights. And the message I received from them was of hope, was of we're going
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to bring everybody in. We're going to make sure that everyone within our nation is going
to not fix anything, but feel seen and feel heard. And we can all do this together as
one nation. Kamala and Coach Walls, I just really felt that they were all going to just
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be a beacon of light. So Kamala to me is Mama Kamala. With her being in leadership, with
her being the president of the United States, means that the foundation that the women had
put in years before to make sure that we have a solid foundation in the United States. Kamala
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was at least going to protect that foundation so that we could build upon what we've already
put into place. She wasn't going to save anybody. You know, for me, I don't expect anyone to
save us. I just want them to see us and hear us. So when right before the election, right
before, I had voted early because I just wanted to make sure that I got my vote in. I was
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like, I don't want to vote on the day because what if I get sick or what if something happens?
So I made sure that I voted early. So I was getting excited. I was really feeling into
it like the days before. I was seeing the rallies of hope and of equality. And this is
what we're going to do. And we hear what you're saying. We're understanding what you need.
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And so I'm like, this is going to happen. We're going to have our first woman president.
I just can't believe it. I even told Brian. I told Brian, I said, I feel like the Barbie
movie is a, I can't even think of the word, is a foreshadowing of what we're about to
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see in the United States. And I was just so excited. So the next day when I woke up and
I saw, well, with my own eyes, because Brian had told me the results because I woke up
very early. And because at first I didn't believe it. And then I saw and I just was
like, oh no, I was, I just, I felt sick to my stomach. And then I, and then I felt a
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heartache. And it really confused me why I felt heartache because I was like, wait a
second, I shouldn't, I shouldn't feel this. But I think I felt that feeling because it
was just like, what now? Because of the men that see him in this light, what are they
going to do? And how are we as women protected? That is what I fear. I, we're already, you
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know, climbing an uphill battle with, you know, men or anyone not believing us when
we are sexually assaulted and also being overlooked. And we're just really fighting
an uphill battle to have equal rights. And so my heart was just broken for women now,
women that had set us up to this point. And also the women that keep that are going to
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be living in the United States from here on. And I actually wasn't really involved in
politics at all before this election, before this term. But when I was hearing the
row versus Wade getting overturned, and I was like, that's not going to happen. And
Brian was like, it might. And I'm like, no, that's not going to happen. And then it
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happened. And that was mine and a lot of other women's bat signal to pay attention. So I
paid attention because we are thinking, and I am thinking, what now, could they take
away more of our rights? What is their plan, you know, for us women going forward? Is
that foundation that all the women had put together hundreds, 50, 20 years ago and now,
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is that foundation getting dismantled? And so I'm, I worry, I'm in fear.
So let me ask you, I've got several questions just along your story. Did you feel, and I
don't think you did because you said you just now got into politics. I was wondering if you
felt this passionate about Hillary Clinton when she was going for president.
I did not. I did not. This is, I did not like Hillary Clinton.
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Okay.
So, yeah, so this is a twist because I was actually, I don't want, I wasn't a Trump
supporter, but I did vote for him in the first because again, what are our options here? It's
either him or her. And then I was like, oh boy, now it just makes me sick to my stomach that I
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even voted for him in the first place. But yes, yeah, I was not a fan of Hillary at all.
Okay. So do you feel like you are drawn? Well, okay, gosh, I have a list of questions. I'm
sitting here. Let me just start in one place. Okay. Do you feel like people today, let's just
start today, people are seen and heard. Let's talk about the LGBTQ community, the women,
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minorities. Do you feel like they are seen and heard right now?
I do not. Well, okay, I do within the Democratic Party. I do within the Democratic Party,
but not in a way that a woman would, not in a way that someone who is in their shoes
would understand what it's like to be them. And this is what I was also, again, when I was trying
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to unravel all of this, I was trying to unravel all of this in my mind of why there is such a
disconnect with just everybody and how I see it is, as God as a man, you cannot understand what
it's like to be me as a woman. Sure. And me as a woman, I cannot understand, as a straight woman,
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I cannot understand what it's like to be a gay man or a lesbian woman. And we don't really know
what it's like to be in their shoes. And that's why I think most men don't understand why women
are so outraged by, by President Trump, elect this time around, because they don't really know
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exactly what we've been experiencing. So I asked Brian, I said, Brian, do you really understand
like what's happening here? Like, do you understand why we are so upset? And he said, Beth, we don't
see what is going on because the men don't do those things in front of us. Like, if I am with you,
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a man is not going to act that way when I am next to you. So we are not going to see what is
happening. I thought, oh, okay, that makes more sense. So I think that the two a point, yes,
the Democratic Party is seeing because they believe in equality, they believe in rights,
but not to not even close to the extent of what each individual is dealing with on our level.
(33:05):
From in this is interesting, because this is probably one of the bigger reasons I wanted
to have you on here is because as a woman, you and I can kind of we can be on the same playing
field. We know what it's like to be a woman. But the difference is I didn't see hope in Kamala and
you did. And that's where I really wanted to get into the mind of what was it that drew you to her.
(33:31):
And then as you as you were talking, my question is, what would she have changed that the Democratic
Party being a woman, what would she have changed? What was that hope for you just that she was a
woman? Or was it because she's experienced things we have experienced? Because your story and my
story are very, very similar. But I have gone in a completely different direction. And what I mean
(33:56):
by that is my my thought process with Kamala was not even oh, she's giving me hope, anything like
that. I didn't judge her based on her being a woman. I judged her based on the information I was
getting. And I didn't feel like it was going to change our world. So that's where my hope kind
of fell off. So tell me a little bit about that part of it. Like what part of her was so hopeful?
(34:23):
So for me, the hopeful part was was her protecting our rights, because I knew that
okay, she and Tim believed in equality, they would keep the foundations that we've already built.
They would make sure that anything that we put together wouldn't just get dismantled. And I was
(34:45):
more, let's see here, I was more turned off by what the Republican Party was saying. I was
really afraid when Roe versus Wade was overturned, because I knew that was very important to the
Republican Party. And I also know that the people who are still in religion believe very
(35:08):
deeply that abortion should not be allowed. And I also know that they don't see the whole story.
They don't see it from a 30,000 foot view. They see it from the eyes of religion. And they see it
as a woman that made a choice to sleep with a man. And now she's using it as birth control.
(35:32):
The a lot of, again, this is just religion, this is not anything else. So through some of their eyes,
they they don't see the fact that people also need abortions when the baby has possibly died in the
womb, or when the baby has not fully developed, and the mother doesn't want to carry that baby to
(35:55):
term undeveloped, or it is risky to carry out a miscarriage. And I don't think they fully, and
again, I don't know, but I don't know if they're informed that a that a DNC is an abortion. I think
they think abortion is only birth control, because they're so outraged by Planned Parenthood,
(36:17):
and they have a hard time seeing outside of that box. So that's interesting. Now, and I just want
to make sure facts are straight and stuff, because I've seen so many. In fact, one of the people I
know very well is an OBGYN, and she has said that DNC is anything that if a baby has not developed,
a DNC, anything like that is not does not fall under that overturn area. Now, I don't know what
(36:42):
happens in the next few years. I mean, I again, but I think that's something that from a person
who's in the practice has said, you know, well, that state level is a big thing for Scott and I
when when we talk about overturning, it is for me for sure. Yeah, laws, you know, we think the
state is a huge part. So I just want to make sure I'm clear. So Kamala was hopeful, because
(37:09):
you felt like she had her her and her party have seen the minority groups clearer than the
Republican Party has. I would imagine you didn't say this outright, but I just formed this opinion
that the toxic nature of what Trump says and a lot of the people in the Republican Party,
especially men, a lot of what they say undermines values of women and who they are.
(37:33):
Correct. Yes. Would that be correct? Yes. And those are the two were those the two big issues
that you really had is that, you know, Kamala was going to be the one who was going to, I mean,
she wouldn't not allow free speech. But do you think just seeing her in a presidential position
would change the vocabulary of people? I do and behaviors. Yes. Yeah, it would like,
(37:56):
you know, it's like we already knew that, you know, these have been tolerated. We know what's
going on. But this, I feel with, you know, Trump getting elected has exaggerated and has brought
to light like how people actually feel, you know, I feel like that's the silver lining is, okay,
(38:17):
now that everyone is, you know, these people are either very happy or these people are outraged,
at least we know where everybody stands, you know, I know the men who, you know,
see women the way they, you know, the way we do are, you know, see women as an object or is less
than or whatever, I know who they are now. And, and I also know how outraged I am, because whenever
(38:43):
I was getting into the advocacy for women, I knew it was important, but I just didn't know how
important it was. And after the election, and I saw all of those comments from the men, and I saw
how women were feeling and how I was feeling, I went, okay, I am crystal clear now that I need
(39:06):
to advocate for women. And of course, now that is, you know, with my business, but also advocate
for women as just tell a woman, hey, you know, what you had said the other day really resonated
with me and thank you for speaking up or when she shares a story of, hey, so and so isn't really
(39:28):
treating me really nice or I'm thinking about, you know, dating this guy, but he has these red flags
and saying, well, you know, let's talk through that. What does that mean? And saying, you know, you
don't need to accept those red flags because you are, you know, you're better than that,
you're worthier than that. And women need to hear, even if they look strong, even if they're just like,
(39:51):
you know, I got this, inside, they may believe something different. So it has brought to light
how women feel, how I feel about it. And I am just going to, to keep advocating for that looks like.
You know, from my view, from a man's view, I do believe that the US is open to having a female
for president. I really do. Me and Connie have talked. And on the 2016 election, the first
(40:17):
election that Trump won, there was a lady in there, Carla Fiorini, that I thought so much of.
And I would have really loved to have, you know, been able to see where that could have went for
us. But I think this is only my view. Looking at what happened with the selection, I don't think
it had anything to do with her being female. I don't think it had anything to do with the
(40:38):
political parties to bleep, be quite honest. I think it has more to do with they wanted an
outsider. And I will never defend his conversations that Trump has. I'm not a huge fan of a lot of
the things he said, of course. Also, like I said on the last episode, there was a county that had
not voted for a Republican since 1876. And they went for Republican this time. It just makes me
(41:03):
wonder, was it because that he was an outsider or is it because he was a man? What is your thought
about? I know I've been thinking about this too. I struggle with that one. But I do agree with you,
Scott, that he is not one of, quote, unquote, them. He is not, you know, yeah, he's not in the
(41:24):
government. He is not one of them. He is an outsider. And so therefore, he is going to be of
the American people. He is going to do what we want. He is going to make America great again.
Yeah, I do believe that. And do you believe that if Joe would have stepped down and gave her more
time? Sorry, Beth, I'm answering that for you. I don't know if that's the case. She only had 100
(41:50):
days. Yes. Trump's been campaigning for how many years now? Four. Exactly. It's true. Yeah. And
that had to be tough. I think Trump, I mean, he was even campaigning before. So his loyal, you know,
followers, whatever you want to say, they've been following him from the very beginning. Yeah. You
(42:10):
know, so some of those, many of those voters are very loyal to Trump specifically. And so they
already have their mind up. I am, you know, I am going this direction. I do believe that if Kamala
had more time, she would have been able to paint a better picture of what her and Tim could create.
(42:33):
But you're right. She just didn't have a whole lot of time. So for the people that were looking for
some type of change, it was really hard for them to see, you know, what's going to happen now? What
are you guys going to do? How are you going to be any different? Right. What do you think would
have happened if Harris would have become president? What would have changed your feeling of safety for
women in a local community? Ours is you to feel safer if she would have been an office? Because
(42:58):
we've gotten so close when it comes to the workplace, not being able to harass in the workplace. And,
you know, putting all these things into place where it's not okay to say something to a woman
in a certain way, I feel like with her as the president, those would still stay in place. Those
would be protected. And so we just wouldn't have to, like, think about it as much. We're still going
(43:23):
to think about it. It's still going to be back on our head. But at least now we have a leader
that's going to understand that this is very important. And this is a big deal that men cannot
act this way or say these things to a woman just because of her being the leader. And now that it's
the other way around, I feel like, you know, they don't see the side of a woman. They don't,
(43:49):
I don't feel like they see that it's very important to keep those, to keep those in place. And so
I'm worried that maybe as time goes on, as the years go on, we might kind of fall back into,
you know, allowing those, those behaviors again. And when women have to worry about, you know,
(44:10):
being assaulted or, or have to kind of like fight off these, these types of behaviors,
we aren't able to fully be ourselves because we're always on guard. We're always thinking about,
well, you know, I have to do this or I have to say that or I don't want to hurt his feelings
because then what's going to happen then? And with Kamala in office, maybe we wouldn't have to worry
(44:32):
about that so much. And we could really just be who we are. We could just, you know, go to therapy
where it's not so much of a taboo. We could, you know, get ourselves healthy, mentally and physically.
And we could, you know, really recognize what those green flags are in a man and be able to
create really great relationships with a man, a man and a woman so that they could see each other
(44:58):
with, with, with love instead of seeing each other as a, as an option. So I just, I just feel like
with her being the leader, it would have at least opened up some doors, you know, enclosed some doors
for women. So we wouldn't have to worry about the things that we do already.
So do you think that if the state of Missouri was to elect a female governor, do you think that would
(45:24):
help Missouri? I feel like if the female governor was for female rights, was for equality, for
rights and not against abortion, then yes, I do believe so. Definitely. Whenever you get into the
Midwest or in the center of the country, whenever you get anywhere that there's a heavy, dominant
(45:45):
religion, when we look at abortion or we look at Roe versus Wade, it is going to be, it's going to
always be tough in Missouri. It's always going to be a very controversial issue. That is maybe
a reason to keep issues like this at a state level because that way one doesn't have to follow
everything. If you don't like the politics of Missouri being able to go one or two states over
(46:07):
and being able to live there to where you feel like, you know, your views are better heard.
Some of these hardcore issues people are just going to say no to. I mean, I was so surprised
with abortion on the ballot that it actually passed this time and maybe that is showing that
Missouri's waking up a little. Yeah, I really feel like a lot of the women saw that bat signal
(46:33):
of the Roe versus Wade and went, okay, we need to do something about it. But I also do not think
that some of them connected the dots that the Republican Party is the party that disagrees
with abortion. I also feel like some of those women do not realize that Roe versus Wade came
(46:54):
from the Republican Party. So I could be wrong, but I do think that many women in general would
like the abortion to stay where it is and then just not realizing that, you know, where, where
that came from. I could be wrong, but that's kind of how I see it, but I don't know.
My last question, how do you think we, since we've got so many different ideas in this country,
(47:17):
how do you think that we go forward together as one country, you know, more than likely you're,
you're going to have a neighbor or member of your family that disagrees on these issues.
Do you, do you sit and talk about it openly? Do you suppress them? What are your thoughts?
What is the right thing to do at this point? Yeah, I love that question. So for me, I'm always
(47:37):
kind of, okay, so when I first meet someone, I kind of get a feel for what kind of conversations I,
I can have with them. So if, you know, if their view is, if they see kind of a smaller view of
the world, or they say, you know what, I just don't believe in that. So, you know, blah, blah,
blah. I'm like, okay, I cannot have these types of conversations with this person. So I don't,
(48:03):
so I don't have those conversations. And then with another individual who maybe is, you know,
talking about something that I feel like her or him and I can, can really discuss this great
topic together. I'm like, okay, you're like this person I can really engage with. So I think it's
more of reading the room of who you can and can't have a conversation with. Instead of looking at
(48:30):
them and going, well, you believe this. So I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to have anything
to do with you, which doesn't help anything. Obviously that's not, that's not going to help.
But at least know, okay, I understand that they might have this point of view. So maybe we're
just not going to have a conversation with that person. And, you know, and pass on by where I
think it gets really hairy is if someone says something derogatory about, you know, a different
(48:57):
race or a different sex. And that offends another person, which, which, you know, is, is, we can
understand why, but that person can't understand why that's where things get really hairy is when
they don't understand why the other person is so upset by this seemingly simple comment. So that's
(49:18):
where we might kind of clash a little bit. But yeah, that's a hard question. You know, I don't
know. For me, it's just reading the room and understanding that some people I just can't
have certain conversations with and knowing that if they do say something derogatory that I do not
agree with, I just say, you know, at Beth, you're the bigger person. We don't want to even engage in
(49:40):
any conversation and move on. Connie. Yeah. What do you think? I agree. Well, and I think what,
you know, one of the things that as far as how we move forward is what you were talking about is
just not just reading the room, but being respectful of what the, who that person is. And there are
going to be people who have never learned respect. They think their opinions are the only valid opinion.
(50:04):
And when that happens, I think I'm, I'm with Beth on this, that you, you can't argue with stupid.
I mean, you just have to move on. And I know I'm being derogatory, just like we said, don't,
but, you know, you just have to kind of move on and walk off and be like, all right, it is what
it is. So I think reading the room is a huge one. But yeah, there you go. Well, I appreciate so much
(50:28):
that you shared your story with us. And it helps us understand a little bit more of what you saw
and what so many people like you, I know saw in the Harris campaign. And before we go, though,
would you do one thing for me and just plug your business again?
Yeah, I would. So yeah, it is budget by Beth.com. And so what I am doing is I am creating and have
(51:00):
created workshops, also a keynote that I put together. And that discusses saving money. And
so what I did, you know, prior to all this is I had one on one conversations with many women and
asking, you know, what, what is it that you are facing? And I asked a lot of really great
(51:23):
conversations that turned into like a therapy session, which I had no idea that would happen.
What I learned, what the common denominator was, is that they're afraid of not having enough.
And that that big number seems so big to reach that saving money, just a small amounts of money
(51:44):
just doesn't seem like enough. So they don't save money at all. So I'm like, oh, okay, here we are.
Now that's just a small, small version of it. So, so yeah, I help women confidently save money by
overcoming their financial fears, getting clarity on what truly matters, and developing a clear and
actual plan for their future. And I do this by going through thought provoking questions, you
(52:07):
know, clarity invoking worksheets, and then consistent repetition. So it's kind of like
personal finance with a twist. And so when we see someone who appears to be rich to us, that looks
like a big house that looks like fancy cars, but those people might not be rich. They might be,
(52:29):
you know, drowning in debt, we don't know if you know, or not, well, I'm sorry, they might be rich,
but they aren't wealthy. So rich is a number. And it is, you know, their income, it's how much money
they are making. So rich is anything according again to the IRS, 500,000 and above. But wealthy
is something that many of us can can wrap our brains around because wealthy is not particularly a
(52:54):
number. Wealthy is a lifestyle. So wealthy to me is going to be very different to to you. And so
it's just the perspective. So say it is a woman that is, you know, is paying for her basic needs,
she is also putting away money and, you know, a 529 for her kids college, she, you know,
(53:19):
she's able to do a few things that she enjoys. She's able to spend time with her kids, she's able
to have a little bit of flexibility in her job. And to her, she is wealthy. But then somebody else
is wealth is having a job with not having a job, but owning their own business, being able to take
(53:41):
off on a Friday if they want to. Wealthy is not driving a certain car and looking a certain way.
Wealthy is a feeling, wealthy is a lifestyle. Wealthy is, you know, just making sure they can
pay for their basic needs and say, you know what, I do have enough. I have enough right now. And
(54:02):
I'm also going to have enough in the future. So that is what I am trying to help people envision.
And these workshops can be with other businesses within our community. They can be with employers
that want to help their employees get more financially secure. I have two workshops already
(54:27):
in the process that are hopefully going to be in January. One is going to be in January. The other
one is still kind of in the works. And then I also have an online course that's going to be
rolling out in January or February as well. They can go to my website and click on, you know,
one of my freebies. I have a freebie that is mastering your credit score. Another freebie,
(54:50):
15 ways to, 15 simple ways to save money. And then about your mindset, getting your mindset in the
correct way in order to be able to see the bigger picture. And then if they, you know, grab one of
those freebies, I'll put them on the email list so that whenever I do have these at least public
workshops in my online classes, they can get an email and know when that is because they are,
(55:16):
they are so close and I am so excited and I just cannot wait to get these workshops going and moving.
Well, congratulations. Wealth is the ultimate form of freedom. And whether it's wealth from
having enough money to do anything you want or wealth from living the way you want, that is
the ultimate freedom. So thank you so much for not only talking to us about the election,
(55:41):
but also providing a service that allows freedom to. Thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah. Well,
thank you for having me on. I was, I was very nervous, but I really enjoyed our conversation.
So thank you. Well, great. Thank you so much for talking with us. And Scott, do you have any last
words? No, thank you. I appreciate it. All right, we'll talk to you soon. Okay. Thank you so much
(56:07):
for listening to this episode of Our Life Beyond. We really hope that you found our discussion
insightful and inspiring or at least brought us a smile to your day. If you did enjoy this episode,
please consider subscribing to the podcast on your favorite platform and leave us a review.
For more information, resources or show notes, visit our website at ourlifebeyond.com. You
(56:28):
can also follow us on social media, search for us on Facebook at Our Life Beyond. We would love
to hear from you, our listeners, so feel free to reach out with your questions, comments or suggestions
through our Contact Us page at ourlifebeyond.com or on social media. And once again, thank you for
joining us on this journey. Till next time, remember, life beyond any challenge is possible,
(56:53):
and we're here to navigate it with you. Stay strong, stay positive and keep moving forward.
Well, hello, hello, hello. Welcome to Our Life Beyond the podcast where we explore how
(00:12):
to navigate and hopefully thrive through some of life's biggest transitions. I'm your
co-host Scott Dibben and I've teamed up with my great friend and mentor Connie King to
share some stories, strategies and insights that helped us adapt to the ever-changing
seasons of our life. Whether your life transition is divorce, death of a loved one, switching
(00:34):
careers, moving to a new city or just trying to figure out what the hell is next, where
with you every step of the way. But always remember we're not therapists, just fellow
travelers with a knack for finding humor in the chaos and maybe some untraditional method
of overcoming what life dishes out to us. Hopefully you'll have fun embarking on this
(00:55):
journey. So now let's get started.
This episode of Our Life Beyond is proudly sponsored by Habit Coffee Company. Located
right off Highway 60 in Rogersville, Habit Coffee is more than just your average coffee
shop. They serve up delicious, scratch-made breakfast and lunch options daily. And they
(01:17):
even specialize in catering local events. With their state-inspected kitchen and a passion
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(01:38):
Hello Connie.
Hello Scott, how are you?
I'm doing well. How are you doing today Connie?
I'm doing really good. What's going on today?
Well, I'm excited about this podcast. You're usually the one that says you're excited,
but I'm excited about this because as you know Connie, I mean politics are something
that I'm not going to say I'm as passionate as a lot of people about, but it does mean
(02:02):
a lot to me. And today we're going to get to hear a different side from what we're
probably used to in Missouri. We're going to actually be talking to, I believe, someone
that is very driven towards Harris and really wants to explain the point of view, which
I'm so interested in because I believe probably half of that view I probably share at least,
(02:23):
if not more. So if you don't mind, I think you have got everything we need to introduce
this guest.
Yes, I do. And I'm thrilled to introduce you to Beth Blaisdell, the founder of Budget
by Beth. Beth is a passionate entrepreneur on a mission to help women gain clarity around
their finances, overcome the emotional obstacles holding them back, and develop clear, actionable
(02:45):
plans for saving and spending with confidence. Through her work, she's not only teaching
her clients how to manage their money, but also empowering them to make intentional choices
that align with their values and goals. Beth's approach is all about building financial confidence
one step at a time and helping her clients achieve financial freedom without the overwhelm.
(03:06):
Whether you're looking to pay down debt, save for a big goal, or simply feel more in control
of your financial life, Beth's insights are going to be incredibly valuable. But today,
Beth's here to talk about something just a little different. In addition to her expertise
in personal finance, she's going to share her reasoning and perspective on why she
chose to support the Harris campaign. It's a fascinating conversation about aligning
(03:30):
personal values with political action and how she feels this particular movement can
make a difference in the lives of everyday people, especially women. So Beth, welcome
to the show. We're excited to have you.
Well, thank you, Connie and Scott. I'm excited to be here.
Great. Well, go ahead, Scott.
(03:50):
I'm going to say, how do we want to start this out, Connie? What do you think? Just
let her maybe share her backstory first?
Yeah, Beth, why don't you tell us? I have a feeling I did a big intro on your business,
but I have a feeling that that gives us a little insight into who you are. But I really
want to know your story. And so if you could kind of tell us a little bit about yourself
(04:14):
and maybe how that coincides with you being more drawn to the Harris side.
Certainly. So yeah, so this story is a little bit long, but it's also very relatable to
many women who experience the same thing I do. So I wanted to kind of clarify who I
(04:37):
am speaking on behalf of, which is women that are in solidarity with me that are maybe too
afraid to speak up or have spoken up and have been overlooked. Women that look past the
red flags and then give him chance after chance. So women who leave work after dark, hold their
(04:59):
keys in a certain way, or have mace ready in case of an attacker. Women who are directly
or indirectly receiving messages that it is okay for someone else to touch them in a sexual
or nonsexual way when they don't want to be touched, you know, and it just keeps going
and going and going. So my story is very familiar to many of us, and this does not exclude like
(05:25):
any party, any religion, any race, any age, how much money you make, it just doesn't matter.
This is from a lens of a woman. So my story, you know, it starts as a young lady when we're
in school and a boy will, you know, nudge us or a little push, just wanting to get our
(05:49):
attention and seemingly innocent, but we find it just a tad bit annoying. And then they
get a little bit aggressive behavior. Maybe it's more of a bullying behavior of, you know,
they flip your hair as they're walking by you in the hallway and say, I'd like to see
what's under that shirt, or something as vulgar as, you know, come over here and sit on my
(06:13):
lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up. And eventually we are like, okay,
this behavior seems wrong. I don't like it. It doesn't feel good. So us young ladies will
go to an adult woman and we'll say, you know, maybe it's someone within our school, maybe
it's someone at home and say, Hey, this is going on and I don't like it. I'm uncomfortable
(06:35):
with it. And then we hear, well, when a boy picks on you, that means he likes you, just
ignore them and eventually they will stop. And so we internalize that as a sign of affection.
And that's very dangerous in my opinion. So then as time goes on, we feel like, okay,
you know, maybe they leave us alone after we ignore them or maybe not. Now if they get
(06:58):
more aggressive, and we get into, you know, maybe high school. And so finally at this
point, a woman or a young lady is frustrated. And she's like, okay, enough is enough. And
she'll say something back to the boy and maybe embarrass him in front of his friends. She'll
stand up for herself. Well, then he'll come over her to her and say, say that again and
(07:20):
find out what happens next and laughs and walks away. And again, this story is something
that is very familiar to me. These are things that I was told in school. So then, you know,
we get the message and it seems very harmless. But to us, it feels very wrong. It feels very
threatening. But other women, adult women are saying, oh, it's not that bad. It's not
(07:45):
that big of a deal. So then we internalize that, well, maybe it isn't that big of a deal.
So I grew up in a Christian home that was non Mormon in a southern Utah town where the
dominant religion was the Church of Jesus Christ, Latter-day Saints Mormon. And since
I was soaked in religion at home in school and also in my social life, I was regularly
(08:12):
fed the message of, you know, a woman's body is a temple. It is something that you need
to take care of, dress in a certain way so that you do not tempt a boy or a man. You
do not say or do anything that will cause the boy to fall into temptation. They call
(08:35):
it the Jezebel spirit. And you don't put yourself in compromising situations for people to say
to you, well, you should have known better. Or, you know, or to say she's easy, quote,
unquote, easy. And so in the town that I lived in, men were held at a higher regard, at a
higher level in the image of God. And so I started to push back and be like, you know,
(08:58):
what's this all about? Because women were not allowed to be a pastor of a church or
in any type of leadership. And I would get the response of, well, it goes back to Genesis.
God had created Adam. He is a man. And Eve was created from his rib. And she was created
(09:22):
to be his helper. So we are here to be helpers of men. So I'm like, okay, well, as I got
older, I would hear messages like children are to be seen and not heard. So please do
not speak unless you are spoken to or asked a question. And, you know, I internalize that
(09:44):
as what I have to say is not important. And then I would see women speak up and either
affect like state of fact or an opinion. And a man would say to them, no, that's not what
happened or you don't know what you're talking about with like an eye roll or a smirk. And
sometimes women would say, just try to get their message across and get frustrated and
(10:09):
you know, it would come out in a certain way. And then of course, the man comes back and
says, oh, well, it must be that time of the month for you then. And then of course, at
that point, I would see just be completely shut down. So as a young girl, it was between
12 and 18, I grew up in a purity culture, which again, in Utah was something that we
(10:31):
practiced, which was abstinence, waiting until marriage, you know, dress modestly. And, you
know, just those traditional genders of, you know, a man is to be the husband, a woman
is to be the wife. And you are to, you know, carry yourself in such a way. And let's see
here, I'm trying to think of purity culture is just really embracing waiting until marriage,
(10:59):
waiting to save yourself for your husband. So as us young women, we were like, yeah,
you know, we were really embracing this. And we were thinking, what's going to be like,
and who is our husband going to be? Do you think it's going to be someone we go to school
with? And just feet, there's really feeling into it. And I, I just wanted to be the poster
(11:20):
child for purity culture. And people knew that that was my intention to wait until marriage.
I have a quick question here, because I know a lot of purity culture comes from Mormonism,
but you were in a different religion. So do you think that actually that influence came
from the outside force? Cause I've lived in Utah too, and you know, you're 1000 people
(11:44):
and you're the one non Mormon. So do you think that that message was sent to you from your
own religion? Or do you, and your own family? Or do you think that was sent to you from
the, the people around you who were Mormon? I think it was more so the Mormon religion.
Because, you know, that was, it was in school. I was going to their events. Yeah. Yeah. I
(12:09):
got it. Yeah. So I was just a really embracing this. And, but what I didn't consider is that
it might not be my choice to wait. So I'm going to try not to cry, but I already told
my mom about, you know, what I was going to share. So by the time I was 17, I was seeing
a teenage boy who was a little bit older than me. And I, again, I told him I'm saving myself
(12:34):
for marriage. I was very, you know, this is my boundary. I didn't know it was a boundary
at a time, but that's, this is where I stand with it. And so we were just really enjoying
each other, having a good time, you know, as young men and women do. And then one night,
we were spending some time together and he had non consensual inter horse with me. And
(12:57):
I remember saying, no, several times, pushing him away. And when I realized that I couldn't
fight back, I just gave up and I blacked out or disassociated. So the next thing I remember
is waking up and he was putting his pants on and saying, you should probably go to the
bathroom. And then he took me home. And so I was really confused because of the messaging
(13:22):
of, you know, if, if, if a boy falls into the temptation of a flash, that means that
you probably did something to cause it. So I thought it was my fault. And I didn't say
anything to anybody. I did not tell my mom, I did not tell anybody. And I thought, you
know, because I just thought, I had done something. I'm the easy girl now. What does
this mean? What does this mean for my salvation? You know, does what does this mean for my
(13:47):
marriage? We went, I do get married someday. Then I get to school the next day. And those
bullies in a middle school knew about it. And they said, Oh, waiting till marriage, huh?
And they started laughing and walking away. And I was like, awesome. So that, you know,
he ended up moving away and, and going moving out of state. But I share this because that
(14:12):
one occurrence in conjunction with the direct messaging I was getting in the home and the
town that I lived in directly affected my relationships going forward. And it affected
it, you know, in my intimacy in my first marriage, because I struggled with being able to, you
know, connect with him in that way. And, you know, eventually he gave up and ended up finding
(14:35):
somebody else and leaving the marriage. And then so that incident really caused my self-esteem
to plummet. And also I had a hard time within that marriage and within the relationships
after that, being able to express myself and how I felt if, if I needed something or if
I wasn't in the argument, the words were just like stuck in my throat. And I just wanted
(15:00):
to say what I wanted or I wanted to say what I didn't want. And I just couldn't get it
out. I couldn't say it. And so then I just started to cry because I was so frustrated.
So this was going on, you know, all the way through my first marriage and my second marriage.
And so finally, by the time I got to leave my second husband, I was in the home that
(15:21):
I had moved into. I moved out of our home and into this home when I was sitting on my
living room couch who was late at night, which is my dog and myself. And of course, you
know, well, well, yes, I mean, we've all gone through really hard times. And so when you're
you're left alone with your thoughts and feelings, and you're just sitting there going, Oh my
gosh, you know, what, what has happened? And you're, I'm feeling shame. I'm feeling just
(15:47):
all kinds of contradictory feelings. And it's all very negative. And so they're starting
to build and build and build. And I really wanted this feeling to go away because it
was too much. It was too heavy. It was too much. And I started to believe that, you know,
if I were to end my life, like nobody would miss me, not one person would miss me, even
(16:09):
though I knew that wasn't true. I really believed that I just needed to end this once and for
all. And so I thought about ways to do it. I thought, you know, how can I do it? You
know, all these different ways that would be quick and efficient. I even started to
write a note. And I'm thinking, who am I writing this note to? You know, and I didn't even,
I couldn't even write any words on a page. And so finally I looked at, I looked at Bella.
(16:34):
And I thought, I can't leave her. I can't leave her behind my sweet puppy. Like she's
the only, I am the only thing she has, you know, because she's a lot, she's a lot. And
then I thought, well, I mean, even if I'm like, Hey, can you take my dog? They're going to
ask me why. So I just thought, okay, I looked at her and she was the reason that I just,
(16:55):
I was able to bring my emotions down and I was able to get it into a better state of
mind. And then at that point, I was like, okay, like just praying in a way, feeling all
the shame isn't working. So then I reached out to a therapist. And at that point, I
realized that I did have childhood trauma because before I did not know I had any childhood
(17:17):
trauma. And she, you know, helped me see that my feelings were valid and I learned what
a boundary was and I learned about codependency, which I had. So after that, I started to talk
to other women and post on Facebook about how great I felt because I was like, Oh my
gosh, like this whole going to therapy and boundary thing is amazing. And when I was
(17:41):
having these conversations with other women, I realized that we were all kind of had the
same story just in different forms. Every single woman I had talked to had had some form of
sexual, verbal or physical abuse within some kind of relationship, whether it was a parent,
whether it was a boyfriend or husband, or whether it was someone at work that would,
(18:06):
you know, maybe pat them on the butt or tease and say, you know, if you don't need that
din length, and you know, you could go ahead and make it up on other ways. And so these
women were just like, well, you know, boys will be boys or, you know, you know how men
are just in a very passive tone. And I was like, Okay, that just doesn't sit well with
me. And then I remember while working at consumer credit counseling, I would teach women about
(18:31):
personal finance at Harmony house and I heard their stories. And I saw myself, I saw myself
in these women. And it was really difficult, because, you know, they were just trying to,
you know, get by and they were, it was the same message, you know, how men can be, they
were bypassing the red flags, they were just not believing in themselves, you know, they
(18:56):
bypass the red flags and gave all of us do not just these women, every woman, it seems
that we are just bypassing the red flags, excusing this bad behavior because quote
unquote, it's not that bad. And then we end up, some of us end up in abusive or deadly
situations or we meet a man online. And if we say, you know, I don't really want to go
(19:21):
forward with this, some of them feel rejected. And, you know, harass us online, or, you know,
if we did go on a date with them, they will just, you know, some of them get very angry.
And so it's, but you don't know who that is until you really understand what a red flag
means and also how to recognize a green flag. So, okay, so why it bothered me that we have
(19:50):
President-elect Trump is because all of those reasons, but also, you know, the 34 felonies,
the, you know, microphones, sexual innuendo, you know, little to no consequences. And that
sends a message to these men that look up to him or these bullies that I went to school
(20:10):
with, that it is okay to treat a woman in this way or say things to a woman, even if
at home, the mom or the dad is saying, you know, it is not okay, you need to respect
women. And this is what that looks like. But because we hear President Trump or elect President
Trump say that lying Kamala is being exposed as the dummy every time she does a show, when
(20:36):
he says they put her in and somehow a woman, somehow she's doing better than the president.
And the VP Vance says we are run by a bunch of miserable cat ladies, miserable childless
cat ladies and childless people shouldn't be allowed to be in government. And then when
(20:59):
they got pushed back, he says, I have nothing against cats. So then the day after the president
gets elected, I see on my Facebook page, your body, my choice. Men are posting your body,
my choice. Men are posting a picture of President Trump with a picture of Kamala and Hillary
(21:20):
saying he beat two women publicly and got away with it. I'm just like, okay, it really
just put me in a complete tailspin. So I have an analogy that you can kind of tell how I
felt the day after the election. So the analogy is this, imagine you're a young person and
(21:41):
you aspire to climb Mount Everest. And so you train. You train your body, you eat healthy,
you buy the clothes, you buy the equipment, you, you know, the boots, whatever you have
to buy to climb Mount Everest, you, you train, you tell everybody about your dream, you think
about it constantly, and you just really feel it. It's in your body and you're so excited
(22:07):
about climbing this mountain and, you know, you get to adulthood and now the day has come
that you're finally able to climb Mount Everest. So you're excited, you have hope, you have
courage, you have fear, you know, all those emotions that we feel when we're doing something
that is, is challenging, that is hard. And so you start to climb and you climb and you're
(22:28):
just so proud of yourself and it feels so good. And you have obstacles. And so you, you
almost get to the top of that mountain. You can feel it. You can see it. You're just like,
oh my gosh, I am almost there. And then I've nowhere. Someone just pushes you all the way
down the mountain. Just pops up nowhere and pushes you down and you fall and you fall
(22:51):
and you fall and you get to the bottom and you're lying on the ground and you look up
and you're like, do I want to try this again? Do I want to eventually get up and try this
again? Or do I want to fold my tent and say, I can't do this? So I completely understand
that people vote for different reasons. I understand that people, you know, there are
(23:11):
some people that just are very loyal to Republican Party. They, they are the Republican Party
so, or the Democrats. So that's how they are going to vote no matter what. I also know
that some people vote because they're tired of the high cost of living or they're worried
about the rug being pulled out from under them. Or, you know, maybe some people just
aren't paying attention and they're just going to vote forever. They, you know, feel like
(23:35):
voting. Some people told me that they didn't vote for either party just because they didn't
like either one of them. And some of us see the larger picture and what that vote really
means to different people. So I was very confused why 50% of America voted for the president
(23:56):
elect. Yeah. And so, but I remembered I was having conversations with people who and still
do who are Trump supporters, Trump followers. And they were saying things to me like he
is going to solve my problem. And this is the fear I have. And he is going to make sure
(24:18):
that my fear is going to be solved. And he, his party encouraged them to only watch Fox
News because the mainstream media is painting them in a different light and not telling
the full story. And some of the people that I talked to truly believe that he is going
(24:39):
to solve these massive problems. He is going to remove the quote unquote trash. He is going
to make America great again. And they are willing to look past his behavior because
they believe that he is going to make these major problems change like these, he is going
to change these, these issues. And it's different this time, but Beth, it's different this time.
(25:06):
And so this morning I woke up and it was so clear inside my mind. It is like when one
of our friends is in a toxic relationship and they break up, they get back together,
they break up. And every single time he or she says it's different this time. But everyone
else knows that it isn't. And I realized why that was the case. But I was extremely disappointed
(25:32):
because of the way I viewed Kamala. So do you want me to go into why I voted for Kamala?
Sure. Yes.
Okay. So the reason I voted for Kamala is, again, I believe in equality. I believe in
protecting rights. And the message I received from them was of hope, was of we're going
(25:55):
to bring everybody in. We're going to make sure that everyone within our nation is going
to not fix anything, but feel seen and feel heard. And we can all do this together as
one nation. Kamala and Coach Walls, I just really felt that they were all going to just
(26:18):
be a beacon of light. So Kamala to me is Mama Kamala. With her being in leadership, with
her being the president of the United States, means that the foundation that the women had
put in years before to make sure that we have a solid foundation in the United States. Kamala
(26:42):
was at least going to protect that foundation so that we could build upon what we've already
put into place. She wasn't going to save anybody. You know, for me, I don't expect anyone to
save us. I just want them to see us and hear us. So when right before the election, right
before, I had voted early because I just wanted to make sure that I got my vote in. I was
(27:07):
like, I don't want to vote on the day because what if I get sick or what if something happens?
So I made sure that I voted early. So I was getting excited. I was really feeling into
it like the days before. I was seeing the rallies of hope and of equality. And this is
what we're going to do. And we hear what you're saying. We're understanding what you need.
(27:30):
And so I'm like, this is going to happen. We're going to have our first woman president.
I just can't believe it. I even told Brian. I told Brian, I said, I feel like the Barbie
movie is a, I can't even think of the word, is a foreshadowing of what we're about to
(27:52):
see in the United States. And I was just so excited. So the next day when I woke up and
I saw, well, with my own eyes, because Brian had told me the results because I woke up
very early. And because at first I didn't believe it. And then I saw and I just was
like, oh no, I was, I just, I felt sick to my stomach. And then I, and then I felt a
(28:18):
heartache. And it really confused me why I felt heartache because I was like, wait a
second, I shouldn't, I shouldn't feel this. But I think I felt that feeling because it
was just like, what now? Because of the men that see him in this light, what are they
going to do? And how are we as women protected? That is what I fear. I, we're already, you
(28:45):
know, climbing an uphill battle with, you know, men or anyone not believing us when
we are sexually assaulted and also being overlooked. And we're just really fighting
an uphill battle to have equal rights. And so my heart was just broken for women now,
women that had set us up to this point. And also the women that keep that are going to
(29:09):
be living in the United States from here on. And I actually wasn't really involved in
politics at all before this election, before this term. But when I was hearing the
row versus Wade getting overturned, and I was like, that's not going to happen. And
Brian was like, it might. And I'm like, no, that's not going to happen. And then it
(29:34):
happened. And that was mine and a lot of other women's bat signal to pay attention. So I
paid attention because we are thinking, and I am thinking, what now, could they take
away more of our rights? What is their plan, you know, for us women going forward? Is
that foundation that all the women had put together hundreds, 50, 20 years ago and now,
(29:59):
is that foundation getting dismantled? And so I'm, I worry, I'm in fear.
So let me ask you, I've got several questions just along your story. Did you feel, and I
don't think you did because you said you just now got into politics. I was wondering if you
felt this passionate about Hillary Clinton when she was going for president.
I did not. I did not. This is, I did not like Hillary Clinton.
(30:22):
Okay.
So, yeah, so this is a twist because I was actually, I don't want, I wasn't a Trump
supporter, but I did vote for him in the first because again, what are our options here? It's
either him or her. And then I was like, oh boy, now it just makes me sick to my stomach that I
(30:45):
even voted for him in the first place. But yes, yeah, I was not a fan of Hillary at all.
Okay. So do you feel like you are drawn? Well, okay, gosh, I have a list of questions. I'm
sitting here. Let me just start in one place. Okay. Do you feel like people today, let's just
start today, people are seen and heard. Let's talk about the LGBTQ community, the women,
(31:09):
minorities. Do you feel like they are seen and heard right now?
I do not. Well, okay, I do within the Democratic Party. I do within the Democratic Party,
but not in a way that a woman would, not in a way that someone who is in their shoes
would understand what it's like to be them. And this is what I was also, again, when I was trying
(31:34):
to unravel all of this, I was trying to unravel all of this in my mind of why there is such a
disconnect with just everybody and how I see it is, as God as a man, you cannot understand what
it's like to be me as a woman. Sure. And me as a woman, I cannot understand, as a straight woman,
(31:56):
I cannot understand what it's like to be a gay man or a lesbian woman. And we don't really know
what it's like to be in their shoes. And that's why I think most men don't understand why women
are so outraged by, by President Trump, elect this time around, because they don't really know
(32:17):
exactly what we've been experiencing. So I asked Brian, I said, Brian, do you really understand
like what's happening here? Like, do you understand why we are so upset? And he said, Beth, we don't
see what is going on because the men don't do those things in front of us. Like, if I am with you,
(32:39):
a man is not going to act that way when I am next to you. So we are not going to see what is
happening. I thought, oh, okay, that makes more sense. So I think that the two a point, yes,
the Democratic Party is seeing because they believe in equality, they believe in rights,
but not to not even close to the extent of what each individual is dealing with on our level.
(33:05):
From in this is interesting, because this is probably one of the bigger reasons I wanted
to have you on here is because as a woman, you and I can kind of we can be on the same playing
field. We know what it's like to be a woman. But the difference is I didn't see hope in Kamala and
you did. And that's where I really wanted to get into the mind of what was it that drew you to her.
(33:31):
And then as you as you were talking, my question is, what would she have changed that the Democratic
Party being a woman, what would she have changed? What was that hope for you just that she was a
woman? Or was it because she's experienced things we have experienced? Because your story and my
story are very, very similar. But I have gone in a completely different direction. And what I mean
(33:56):
by that is my my thought process with Kamala was not even oh, she's giving me hope, anything like
that. I didn't judge her based on her being a woman. I judged her based on the information I was
getting. And I didn't feel like it was going to change our world. So that's where my hope kind
of fell off. So tell me a little bit about that part of it. Like what part of her was so hopeful?
(34:23):
So for me, the hopeful part was was her protecting our rights, because I knew that
okay, she and Tim believed in equality, they would keep the foundations that we've already built.
They would make sure that anything that we put together wouldn't just get dismantled. And I was
(34:45):
more, let's see here, I was more turned off by what the Republican Party was saying. I was
really afraid when Roe versus Wade was overturned, because I knew that was very important to the
Republican Party. And I also know that the people who are still in religion believe very
(35:08):
deeply that abortion should not be allowed. And I also know that they don't see the whole story.
They don't see it from a 30,000 foot view. They see it from the eyes of religion. And they see it
as a woman that made a choice to sleep with a man. And now she's using it as birth control.
(35:32):
The a lot of, again, this is just religion, this is not anything else. So through some of their eyes,
they they don't see the fact that people also need abortions when the baby has possibly died in the
womb, or when the baby has not fully developed, and the mother doesn't want to carry that baby to
(35:55):
term undeveloped, or it is risky to carry out a miscarriage. And I don't think they fully, and
again, I don't know, but I don't know if they're informed that a that a DNC is an abortion. I think
they think abortion is only birth control, because they're so outraged by Planned Parenthood,
(36:17):
and they have a hard time seeing outside of that box. So that's interesting. Now, and I just want
to make sure facts are straight and stuff, because I've seen so many. In fact, one of the people I
know very well is an OBGYN, and she has said that DNC is anything that if a baby has not developed,
a DNC, anything like that is not does not fall under that overturn area. Now, I don't know what
(36:42):
happens in the next few years. I mean, I again, but I think that's something that from a person
who's in the practice has said, you know, well, that state level is a big thing for Scott and I
when when we talk about overturning, it is for me for sure. Yeah, laws, you know, we think the
state is a huge part. So I just want to make sure I'm clear. So Kamala was hopeful, because
(37:09):
you felt like she had her her and her party have seen the minority groups clearer than the
Republican Party has. I would imagine you didn't say this outright, but I just formed this opinion
that the toxic nature of what Trump says and a lot of the people in the Republican Party,
especially men, a lot of what they say undermines values of women and who they are.
(37:33):
Correct. Yes. Would that be correct? Yes. And those are the two were those the two big issues
that you really had is that, you know, Kamala was going to be the one who was going to, I mean,
she wouldn't not allow free speech. But do you think just seeing her in a presidential position
would change the vocabulary of people? I do and behaviors. Yes. Yeah, it would like,
(37:56):
you know, it's like we already knew that, you know, these have been tolerated. We know what's
going on. But this, I feel with, you know, Trump getting elected has exaggerated and has brought
to light like how people actually feel, you know, I feel like that's the silver lining is, okay,
(38:17):
now that everyone is, you know, these people are either very happy or these people are outraged,
at least we know where everybody stands, you know, I know the men who, you know,
see women the way they, you know, the way we do are, you know, see women as an object or is less
than or whatever, I know who they are now. And, and I also know how outraged I am, because whenever
(38:43):
I was getting into the advocacy for women, I knew it was important, but I just didn't know how
important it was. And after the election, and I saw all of those comments from the men, and I saw
how women were feeling and how I was feeling, I went, okay, I am crystal clear now that I need
(39:06):
to advocate for women. And of course, now that is, you know, with my business, but also advocate
for women as just tell a woman, hey, you know, what you had said the other day really resonated
with me and thank you for speaking up or when she shares a story of, hey, so and so isn't really
(39:28):
treating me really nice or I'm thinking about, you know, dating this guy, but he has these red flags
and saying, well, you know, let's talk through that. What does that mean? And saying, you know, you
don't need to accept those red flags because you are, you know, you're better than that,
you're worthier than that. And women need to hear, even if they look strong, even if they're just like,
(39:51):
you know, I got this, inside, they may believe something different. So it has brought to light
how women feel, how I feel about it. And I am just going to, to keep advocating for that looks like.
You know, from my view, from a man's view, I do believe that the US is open to having a female
for president. I really do. Me and Connie have talked. And on the 2016 election, the first
(40:17):
election that Trump won, there was a lady in there, Carla Fiorini, that I thought so much of.
And I would have really loved to have, you know, been able to see where that could have went for
us. But I think this is only my view. Looking at what happened with the selection, I don't think
it had anything to do with her being female. I don't think it had anything to do with the
(40:38):
political parties to bleep, be quite honest. I think it has more to do with they wanted an
outsider. And I will never defend his conversations that Trump has. I'm not a huge fan of a lot of
the things he said, of course. Also, like I said on the last episode, there was a county that had
not voted for a Republican since 1876. And they went for Republican this time. It just makes me
(41:03):
wonder, was it because that he was an outsider or is it because he was a man? What is your thought
about? I know I've been thinking about this too. I struggle with that one. But I do agree with you,
Scott, that he is not one of, quote, unquote, them. He is not, you know, yeah, he's not in the
(41:24):
government. He is not one of them. He is an outsider. And so therefore, he is going to be of
the American people. He is going to do what we want. He is going to make America great again.
Yeah, I do believe that. And do you believe that if Joe would have stepped down and gave her more
time? Sorry, Beth, I'm answering that for you. I don't know if that's the case. She only had 100
(41:50):
days. Yes. Trump's been campaigning for how many years now? Four. Exactly. It's true. Yeah. And
that had to be tough. I think Trump, I mean, he was even campaigning before. So his loyal, you know,
followers, whatever you want to say, they've been following him from the very beginning. Yeah. You
(42:10):
know, so some of those, many of those voters are very loyal to Trump specifically. And so they
already have their mind up. I am, you know, I am going this direction. I do believe that if Kamala
had more time, she would have been able to paint a better picture of what her and Tim could create.
(42:33):
But you're right. She just didn't have a whole lot of time. So for the people that were looking for
some type of change, it was really hard for them to see, you know, what's going to happen now? What
are you guys going to do? How are you going to be any different? Right. What do you think would
have happened if Harris would have become president? What would have changed your feeling of safety for
women in a local community? Ours is you to feel safer if she would have been an office? Because
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we've gotten so close when it comes to the workplace, not being able to harass in the workplace. And,
you know, putting all these things into place where it's not okay to say something to a woman
in a certain way, I feel like with her as the president, those would still stay in place. Those
would be protected. And so we just wouldn't have to, like, think about it as much. We're still going
(43:23):
to think about it. It's still going to be back on our head. But at least now we have a leader
that's going to understand that this is very important. And this is a big deal that men cannot
act this way or say these things to a woman just because of her being the leader. And now that it's
the other way around, I feel like, you know, they don't see the side of a woman. They don't,
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I don't feel like they see that it's very important to keep those, to keep those in place. And so
I'm worried that maybe as time goes on, as the years go on, we might kind of fall back into,
you know, allowing those, those behaviors again. And when women have to worry about, you know,
(44:10):
being assaulted or, or have to kind of like fight off these, these types of behaviors,
we aren't able to fully be ourselves because we're always on guard. We're always thinking about,
well, you know, I have to do this or I have to say that or I don't want to hurt his feelings
because then what's going to happen then? And with Kamala in office, maybe we wouldn't have to worry
(44:32):
about that so much. And we could really just be who we are. We could just, you know, go to therapy
where it's not so much of a taboo. We could, you know, get ourselves healthy, mentally and physically.
And we could, you know, really recognize what those green flags are in a man and be able to
create really great relationships with a man, a man and a woman so that they could see each other
(44:58):
with, with, with love instead of seeing each other as a, as an option. So I just, I just feel like
with her being the leader, it would have at least opened up some doors, you know, enclosed some doors
for women. So we wouldn't have to worry about the things that we do already.
So do you think that if the state of Missouri was to elect a female governor, do you think that would
(45:24):
help Missouri? I feel like if the female governor was for female rights, was for equality, for
rights and not against abortion, then yes, I do believe so. Definitely. Whenever you get into the
Midwest or in the center of the country, whenever you get anywhere that there's a heavy, dominant
(45:45):
religion, when we look at abortion or we look at Roe versus Wade, it is going to be, it's going to
always be tough in Missouri. It's always going to be a very controversial issue. That is maybe
a reason to keep issues like this at a state level because that way one doesn't have to follow
everything. If you don't like the politics of Missouri being able to go one or two states over
(46:07):
and being able to live there to where you feel like, you know, your views are better heard.
Some of these hardcore issues people are just going to say no to. I mean, I was so surprised
with abortion on the ballot that it actually passed this time and maybe that is showing that
Missouri's waking up a little. Yeah, I really feel like a lot of the women saw that bat signal
(46:33):
of the Roe versus Wade and went, okay, we need to do something about it. But I also do not think
that some of them connected the dots that the Republican Party is the party that disagrees
with abortion. I also feel like some of those women do not realize that Roe versus Wade came
(46:54):
from the Republican Party. So I could be wrong, but I do think that many women in general would
like the abortion to stay where it is and then just not realizing that, you know, where, where
that came from. I could be wrong, but that's kind of how I see it, but I don't know.
My last question, how do you think we, since we've got so many different ideas in this country,
(47:17):
how do you think that we go forward together as one country, you know, more than likely you're,
you're going to have a neighbor or member of your family that disagrees on these issues.
Do you, do you sit and talk about it openly? Do you suppress them? What are your thoughts?
What is the right thing to do at this point? Yeah, I love that question. So for me, I'm always
(47:37):
kind of, okay, so when I first meet someone, I kind of get a feel for what kind of conversations I,
I can have with them. So if, you know, if their view is, if they see kind of a smaller view of
the world, or they say, you know what, I just don't believe in that. So, you know, blah, blah,
blah. I'm like, okay, I cannot have these types of conversations with this person. So I don't,
(48:03):
so I don't have those conversations. And then with another individual who maybe is, you know,
talking about something that I feel like her or him and I can, can really discuss this great
topic together. I'm like, okay, you're like this person I can really engage with. So I think it's
more of reading the room of who you can and can't have a conversation with. Instead of looking at
(48:30):
them and going, well, you believe this. So I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to have anything
to do with you, which doesn't help anything. Obviously that's not, that's not going to help.
But at least know, okay, I understand that they might have this point of view. So maybe we're
just not going to have a conversation with that person. And, you know, and pass on by where I
think it gets really hairy is if someone says something derogatory about, you know, a different
(48:57):
race or a different sex. And that offends another person, which, which, you know, is, is, we can
understand why, but that person can't understand why that's where things get really hairy is when
they don't understand why the other person is so upset by this seemingly simple comment. So that's
(49:18):
where we might kind of clash a little bit. But yeah, that's a hard question. You know, I don't
know. For me, it's just reading the room and understanding that some people I just can't
have certain conversations with and knowing that if they do say something derogatory that I do not
agree with, I just say, you know, at Beth, you're the bigger person. We don't want to even engage in
(49:40):
any conversation and move on. Connie. Yeah. What do you think? I agree. Well, and I think what,
you know, one of the things that as far as how we move forward is what you were talking about is
just not just reading the room, but being respectful of what the, who that person is. And there are
going to be people who have never learned respect. They think their opinions are the only valid opinion.
(50:04):
And when that happens, I think I'm, I'm with Beth on this, that you, you can't argue with stupid.
I mean, you just have to move on. And I know I'm being derogatory, just like we said, don't,
but, you know, you just have to kind of move on and walk off and be like, all right, it is what
it is. So I think reading the room is a huge one. But yeah, there you go. Well, I appreciate so much
(50:28):
that you shared your story with us. And it helps us understand a little bit more of what you saw
and what so many people like you, I know saw in the Harris campaign. And before we go, though,
would you do one thing for me and just plug your business again?
Yeah, I would. So yeah, it is budget by Beth.com. And so what I am doing is I am creating and have
(51:00):
created workshops, also a keynote that I put together. And that discusses saving money. And
so what I did, you know, prior to all this is I had one on one conversations with many women and
asking, you know, what, what is it that you are facing? And I asked a lot of really great
(51:23):
conversations that turned into like a therapy session, which I had no idea that would happen.
What I learned, what the common denominator was, is that they're afraid of not having enough.
And that that big number seems so big to reach that saving money, just a small amounts of money
(51:44):
just doesn't seem like enough. So they don't save money at all. So I'm like, oh, okay, here we are.
Now that's just a small, small version of it. So, so yeah, I help women confidently save money by
overcoming their financial fears, getting clarity on what truly matters, and developing a clear and
actual plan for their future. And I do this by going through thought provoking questions, you
(52:07):
know, clarity invoking worksheets, and then consistent repetition. So it's kind of like
personal finance with a twist. And so when we see someone who appears to be rich to us, that looks
like a big house that looks like fancy cars, but those people might not be rich. They might be,
(52:29):
you know, drowning in debt, we don't know if you know, or not, well, I'm sorry, they might be rich,
but they aren't wealthy. So rich is a number. And it is, you know, their income, it's how much money
they are making. So rich is anything according again to the IRS, 500,000 and above. But wealthy
is something that many of us can can wrap our brains around because wealthy is not particularly a
(52:54):
number. Wealthy is a lifestyle. So wealthy to me is going to be very different to to you. And so
it's just the perspective. So say it is a woman that is, you know, is paying for her basic needs,
she is also putting away money and, you know, a 529 for her kids college, she, you know,
(53:19):
she's able to do a few things that she enjoys. She's able to spend time with her kids, she's able
to have a little bit of flexibility in her job. And to her, she is wealthy. But then somebody else
is wealth is having a job with not having a job, but owning their own business, being able to take
(53:41):
off on a Friday if they want to. Wealthy is not driving a certain car and looking a certain way.
Wealthy is a feeling, wealthy is a lifestyle. Wealthy is, you know, just making sure they can
pay for their basic needs and say, you know what, I do have enough. I have enough right now. And
(54:02):
I'm also going to have enough in the future. So that is what I am trying to help people envision.
And these workshops can be with other businesses within our community. They can be with employers
that want to help their employees get more financially secure. I have two workshops already
(54:27):
in the process that are hopefully going to be in January. One is going to be in January. The other
one is still kind of in the works. And then I also have an online course that's going to be
rolling out in January or February as well. They can go to my website and click on, you know,
one of my freebies. I have a freebie that is mastering your credit score. Another freebie,
(54:50):
15 ways to, 15 simple ways to save money. And then about your mindset, getting your mindset in the
correct way in order to be able to see the bigger picture. And then if they, you know, grab one of
those freebies, I'll put them on the email list so that whenever I do have these at least public
workshops in my online classes, they can get an email and know when that is because they are,
(55:16):
they are so close and I am so excited and I just cannot wait to get these workshops going and moving.
Well, congratulations. Wealth is the ultimate form of freedom. And whether it's wealth from
having enough money to do anything you want or wealth from living the way you want, that is
the ultimate freedom. So thank you so much for not only talking to us about the election,
(55:41):
but also providing a service that allows freedom to. Thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah. Well,
thank you for having me on. I was, I was very nervous, but I really enjoyed our conversation.
So thank you. Well, great. Thank you so much for talking with us. And Scott, do you have any last
words? No, thank you. I appreciate it. All right, we'll talk to you soon. Okay. Thank you so much
(56:07):
for listening to this episode of Our Life Beyond. We really hope that you found our discussion
insightful and inspiring or at least brought us a smile to your day. If you did enjoy this episode,
please consider subscribing to the podcast on your favorite platform and leave us a review.
For more information, resources or show notes, visit our website at ourlifebeyond.com. You
(56:28):
can also follow us on social media, search for us on Facebook at Our Life Beyond. We would love
to hear from you, our listeners, so feel free to reach out with your questions, comments or suggestions
through our Contact Us page at ourlifebeyond.com or on social media. And once again, thank you for
joining us on this journey. Till next time, remember, life beyond any challenge is possible,
(56:53):
and we're here to navigate it with you. Stay strong, stay positive and keep moving forward.
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