Episode 24: Running

Episode Transcript
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Harry Weidner (00:03):
All right, welcome back to our tangled
mines

Jack Weidner (00:10):
Welcome to our tangled minds.

I'm Harry Weidner.

I'm Jack Weidner.

No you're not don't Jack Bagnato

god damn ulit name for 25 years and you it changes,

but how many times do you say like your first
and last name?

People I don't know if I have any friends that
listen to this podcast. If Ihave friends that listen this
podcast, I want you to email usat our tangled vines@gmail.com
and say how many times I use mylast name and conversation I
never introduce myself. As withmy last name, I am never Jack

(00:48):
Weidner. I'm never John Weidner.
I'm never Mr. Weidner. I'm notMrs. Weidner. I am, Jack.

But I don't use my every every time we record
I'm like he's gonna get it rightthis No fuck.

I think I got it right once. And Neato.

No. So anyway, this is episode 24. And this is
a I don't know, I don't knowwhen we say that. We've been
doing this for one year, butit's coming up. It's our first
episode was posted. Yeah. OnFebruary 23rd, I think,

Oh, shit. So this is like the one year
anniversary.

This is like the almost one year anniversary?
Yeah.

Wow. Oh, I know, like averaging about. We
averaged about two a month.
Yeah,

that's good.
That's good. I mean, how manyshould we have?

But we skipped? I think two a month is better. I
think

we're good. Yeah.

I think you're great. Beautiful stuff.

Yeah. So happy one year doing this are not
quite one year, but like oneyear ish. One year. Jason, when
you get

to a point, you'll learn you've never been in a
relationship long enough tounderstand this. Know, when you
get to a point and ananniversary, and I think we're
at this point, we're 24 and thevague ality of the the nearness
to want an anniversary isenough. That's what matters.
You're close

to one year.
We've made it one year. We've

made it one year, especially by the time this was
released on the 19th PresidentsDay. That's that's basically the
23rd Oh,

the 19th is Presidents Day. Yep. I'm like
pretty sure I still have to workthem.

I am off. But you might work your clients will not
be working because the guy knowsoff.

But we'll be getting work done for them.
Yeah, we work hard so they don'thave to

that is every contract.

So I don't know what have we talked about in the
past year, a whole lot of notmuch talked

a lot of so much stuff.

What else is new?
What have you been up to? Let'sjust do it.

I went snowboarding this weekend. And I
didn't want to go snowboarding.
I I went skiing. And the peoplethat I was skiing with. were new
to skiing, and they don't likebeing new at things. So I said I
will learn something as well.

Whoa.

Oh my Lord, it is so so we you and I have been
skiing for 21 years now. i Momand I did the math to completely
transition to snowboardingbecause you're you're it's like
a different plane of thought youwere going down the mountain in

(03:43):
a different way. Yeah, it is. Soit is a just a crazy thing. And
then I fell a lot and my I justmight ask hurt so bad I bruised
my like I don't know what likethe to not not my tailbone but
like the two bones, the bonyprocesses off your issue. And if

(04:05):
there is she'll tuberosities Idon't know. If you're going to
med school you'll learn I'llneed to know I Bruce and they
hurt so badly. And so one time Iwas like avoiding someone and in
trying to avoid them. I fell sohard on my ass. And it like was

(04:28):
one of those it stung and likeit just it just I hurt myself so
badly. And I felt pain for thereal for real pain for the first
time in a while and I just laidthere and then I was scared to
fall again because I was like ohmy god. Like

I hear that happens when people snowboard
and fall.

But so then I couldn't commit like before I
was committing and I was likeokay, this is fine. And I was
like feeling myself on the edges

and if you catch an edge then then it sucks. I
caught

an ad inch and I would face first into the snow
just like completely buried myface. Not snow. It was ice
because it was 50 degrees. Ifell on ice. That's why it hurts
so bad. It wasn't even slushy.
It was just ice. Yeah. Was itSeven Springs? No Hidden Valley,
because I heard Seven Springs isso crowded. It wasn't like a

(05:20):
good place to learn

is a lower

mountain mountain.
Yeah. But that's you remember itlower mountain. That's also not
that's not a good. You don'tlearn? No, no. So the second day
I went skiing, because, like, Ijust I was so sore. I was like,
I'm not going to this talk. It'dbe a productive day. And I had
already bought a day pass. So Iwas like, I'm going to try to
get my money.

And you stayed at home?

Yeah. drove out every morning. Wow.

I guess I missed that. Because I was in Arizona.

I tried to call you but you didn't pick up?
Well.

Right. I was on a run,

right? No, no, no, I'm not talking about Monday. Or
Sunday. I was I've been talkingabout. I tried to call you
Friday. You were on an airplane.

Oh, yeah.
wouldn't have been able toanswer. Yeah. American Airlines
six hour flight. Super fun.
That's brutal. Which honestly, Ithink that's where I got sick. I
think that's why I'm not feelingwell, right now. I think it was
the airplane out and then it wasbuilding while I was there. And
then I left. And now I'm I gotsome sniffles.

I think my least favorite part about skiing. And
this is so funny to me is

the other you know, the

food. Well, yeah.
It's like, insane. Still.

It's only gotten worse. Yeah.

I'm actually I feel like the prices are the
same.

What's like a slice of pizza like $12 $12.
Wow. But just

slice. It's like, all personal

like a quarter pie. Yeah. But still, it was
always crazy. Yeah. Huh. That'snot fun. I when I was home for
Christmas, I went cross countryskiing. Yeah. And that was much
more enjoyable then. People andyou didn't have to. I didn't
have to deal with anyone. Icould bring my own snacks. It

(07:20):
was awesome. I really had a goodtime. We

stopped at a coffee shop though. And I bought
some homemade granola. It's thebest granola it's so dense
though. I picked it up expectingstore granola. My hand basically
fell to the floor. It's a dense,

like a good granola made with like fresh low
pressure listed honey. Yeah,yeah. That sounds good. Yeah, it
was great. Where was where wasthat play?

It was on the way out to Hidden Valley. I don't
know exactly like somewhere nearDonegal. called Silver horse
coffee. Pretty sweet. Yeah, theyhad burritos that were
delicious, too. Well, that's

fun. I'm glad you had fun. Yeah, it

was great time.
Good time.

I have so I haven't gotten out this this
year yet.

I will he had you're done. What do you mean
yet?

I don't know. I'm busy. If you don't go

this weekend.
You're no I'm just saying likeyou didn't go out this year.
Like I don't think you can sayyet. Like the season's over. If
you thought this weekend. Ithink it's not.

No, you forget that I live up north.

I don't think I

imagine some of the mountains like up in Maine
or Vermont are pretty decentstill. I don't know. Johnny
skiing today. He's skiing rightnow.

Okay. Yeah, I'll have to say how it is. I'm not
saying they want us. No, I'mjust saying you might not be.
Well, I

mean, I will

have time but right. So you're not

so long story short, you're right. But I admit
it.

So why don't you tell the people about what you
did this weekend cuz I want tohear about it. We haven't really
talked Yeah,

I went to Scottsdale Arizona with some of
my best friends from college.
And it was awesome. And we hadjust a blast really like the
whole weekend. I couldn't stoplaughing because everything
everything was just awesome. SoI

just this is why it Talking with you is like
exhausting because you go like Iwas in Scottsdale Arizona. You
don't say why? You like I waswith the fellas as if that
describes and to me because I'veno you enough describes exactly
who you're with. And then you'relike, it was like a vibe like it

(09:36):
was just the it was great. Itwas why you were there. You
don't say what you That was fun.
You were like let me try to getI was laughing because like what
it got like okay,

let me try this again. Let me try this again.
One of our friends has a housein Scottsdale and we all went
down for the waste managementopen like the golf tournament.
Can

you explain what waste the waste of Management me
because yeah, I actually don'tknow. I

mean, I'm also not much of a golfer. So, but I
do like to have fun. And sothat's really what waste
management is a lot of golftournaments like you have to be
respectful and quiet pleaseyada, yada. But this you had to
a little bit but the wastemanagement is known as like the
people's open. So people go towaste management to like, just

(10:24):
yell and get a little rowdy onon a golf course. And it's it
really is like it's all justlike me imagine copy and pasting
me and my friends hundreds andhundreds of times over the
horrify. And so that's what itis. It's just like this rowdy

(10:45):
golf tournament. Where on the 16pole that you just yell, and
it's a par three, and it's justfun. It's just a fun golf
tournament and they sell beereverywhere. This year, it was
interesting, because theyactually had to stop alcohol
sales because people didn't knowhow to contain themselves. So

(11:08):
there, there were multiplearrests, a couple people had to
get carried out. Lots of peoplegot kicked out. It was chaotic.
It was awesome. But whathappened was it rained the week
of and so normally doesn't rainin the desert. But here it had
rained into the drainage waspoor and it was muddy and people

(11:29):
were falling down these hills ofmud drum drunk. And it was it
was it was absolutely chaos.

Is it sponsored by the mafia? No, I

sponsored by waste management.

I asked the same question. I know, does it or
does it allegedly have like tiesto that? No,

I don't think so.
Okay. I don't know. I mean,yeah, I don't. Because but so we
went on Saturday, which was theday they shut down. The alcohol
sales and vibes were so highbefore they shut down the
alcohol sales. And then theyshut down the alcohol sales and
everyone got grumpy and left. Itwas wild.

So we left, I realized how bad was it how it
was pretty shutdown alcoholsales. It

was. It was pretty bad. There's a video of a
guy like running into a sandtrap on the 16th. And doing like
Sandy drills. Well, people aregolfing, like professional
golfers are golfing. There werepeople just sliding down hills

(12:39):
of mud and getting muddy. If youlook online, like there are
videos of just drunk peoplewandering around not knowing
where they are. It was chaos. I

would say this sounds like a golf tournament
that I would like. That is nottrue because I don't think I
like what it turns into. But Ialso hate golf. I don't know how
to know

this. This made golf fun. This made golf a lot
of fun. It was it was great.
Sounds like golf would be morefun. Yeah. And to be like in
Arizona in the desert. What

is Arizona? Okay, wait, it was very, I have an
actual question. Yeah, I cananswer. What is the dry heat?
Like? Is it different? Actually,it

wasn't that it was just about as hot. It was
just about as hot there as itwas here. So like 60 ish
degrees. So it rained a littlebit on Saturday morning. And it
wasn't super warm. So like Isaid 60. Low 60s. Not too hot. I

(13:40):
imagine if I remember this dryheat, though. Everyone says it's
better. Well, when I was theretwo summers ago on my road trip.
Oh, you're dry. He was awesome.
To dry. He was very cool. It waslike you don't feel yucky. You
know, sometimes when you get outof the shower, and it's really
humid outside, and you justnever dry off. Yeah. You don't
feel like that. I feel yucky allthe time. Yeah. You don't have

(14:02):
like residual yuck hanging outall over you. Right. So that's
what, that's how I woulddescribe it. But since I came
back home on the Red Eye Mondaynight into Tuesday morning, it's
just been an absolute battle toget my life back together and
like feel okay again andrecover. Because we were up

(14:23):
until I don't know two or threein the morning every night
there. And two or three in themorning. There is like four or
five here. So I'm just alldiscombobulated out of whack
screwed up. Sick. Behind on work

on Yeah, I

know. So um Wednesday was a particularly
terrible day. I was just like,stressed all day long. But I was
okay. I it's all it's alltogether again. They put Humpty
Dumpty back together again. So,yeah,

she didn't have a good Valentine's Day. No,

I never do. I've never had a good Valentine's Day
my entire life. Yeah.

The good karma holiday. Well, I

think it's a terrible holiday. Or mother's
always my valentine. Mom

is the best Valentine. Yeah. Like she's
loves Valentine's Day.

I don't know why it's such a shithole in it. Yes.
But I've also never been in likea relationship. So I have no,

I've been I hate Valentine's Day.

You didn't do anything? No, I

did. So I went in so many particular. Oh, that's
cool. It was awesome. He talkedwith his wife. And they just
like he's so funny. It wasgreat. It's a good time. Yeah,
like I do things. I just, Idon't like that. It's like, you
have to do it this day. I thinkit's because I don't like being
told what to do.

Yeah, that works.
That could be that adds up.
That's yeah.

We're gonna do a little Freudian analysis, like,
like being told that that he hasto do something. It's like, I'll
be fucking romantic. But don'ttell me to do it. Don't tell me.
Don't tell me when? I'll tellyou. I'll do what I've got them
ready.

But what is it fun about Valentine's day is
like, tapping through theInstagram stories and seeing
people that you didn't know,were in relationships in
relationships. Like when didthat happen? You know? Yeah,
cool. Anywho

I just want to let you know, I'm healthier and
better than you because I'm offInstagram right now. Nice, man.
Just kidding. I'm not betterthan anyone. I was addicted to
it. And I lent you know how thatis a thing right now. Yeah. And,
you know, I'm not reallyCatholic, but like, I figured
now's as good of an excuse as Ineed to just delete. Yeah,

you're gonna have the most Jewish lend ever did.
Am I allowed to say that? Can Isay?

I don't even know what a Jewish lamp would be
like, well,

it's whatever you're doing. Okay. No, I just
have Instagram on my computer.
So yes, you're better than me.
But

I just think it's funny. Like, everyone gives up
social media. Which I think is ahard thing, because we are
addicted to it. And like, whichYeah, I don't know. Like, it's
exotic. It's like, Alright, keepit to yourself.

Yeah, I,

I just I say that, like I just told everyone that
listens to this, but

I don't know. I it's a good way to communicate
with people who you don't oftensee. But two fellas that we all
went to Scottsdale with, like,we all send each other funny.
Instagram, you have a group

chat. Right? So it's, well, we

have a text message group chat, but also
like, on Instagram. Can befunny. There's, there's a
there's a group chat. Yeah. So Idon't know. It's a good way. And
like Snapchat as well. The onlyreason I still have Snapchat is
because of those guys. Becauseevery now and then someone will

(18:09):
send something just hilarious.
And then we'll have like littleconversations, a little side
conversation through Snapchat.

I just used it to mindlessly scroll. Snapchat, no
Instagram. So that's like, Ithink when it's not a good

thing. No, no.
Doom scroll.

I'm really good at Doom scrolling.

Yeah. As we recovered, I don't know if
you're good at doom.

I don't know if it comes across. But I'm
particularly good at Doomscrolling. Um,

let's go to you deleted it, then

I'm like a professional. Good. I, someone
was going to the airport. And Itexted them. And I said, Do you
need a ride? I just wanted tomake sure. And they're like, No,
I'm good. It's all covered. Butthank you for thinking about me.
And I literally sat back, I waslike, I'm so good at worrying.
It took zero effort to check outwith you. That was the easiest

(19:08):
thing I'll do all day.

I'm a strong believer in taking people to the
airport because it sucks.

That is the least shocking thing out here. But I
have

taken so many people to the fucking airport.
Also

the least shocking thing out here all day. Harry
does this thing where he willtake a very hard stance that he
hates something. He willcomplain about it for years. I
mean, the same event like hecould have taken me to the
airport six years ago. He willstill complain. I'll bring it
up. He'll complain about it. Buthe'll do it. It's just it's

(19:43):
like, you know, mom will belike, Oh, Harry. Harry is mad
about this. And I'm like, Yeah,but he's doing it right. Like of
course. Of course. He's veryhe's upset about something like

yeah, I'm always pissed about some but I've never
really pissed about any

right like You're gonna do, like I hate. Go like,
you're just like go to theairport is the worst thing in
the universe. It sucks. And thenyou're like, really? Isn't you
like, no. Do you do it all thetime? Yeah. But yeah,

I'm allowed. I'm entitled to my own opinions.

I could play you know, I'm not gonna Yeah, I just
think it's funny because Mom Momloves mom is like, anytime you
complain about anything. Mom isjust like, oh, Harry's
distraught. Like, it's like youneed like a chase, where it's
like, oh, God, hair.

But I'm always happy. That's what's fun about
it. You

are? Yeah. So this is a good time, I think to
transition into what I wanted totalk about today. Which is you
being happy, which I think isrelatively, you being alone,
running or working out? Like Ithink you got a I want to talk
about your process for runningbecause I'm really curious about

(21:01):
that. And you're, you know, youhave a lot of running coming up.
And a lot of a lot of exerciseplans. So Harry wants to talk
about hobbies. And that way,that way we can. That way, we
could both talk about things.
And I said, I don't have hobbiesat the moment. And he said, You
read me just what the peoplewant to hear about my reading. I

(21:26):
sit in a chair. Now, we're goingto talk about

you running right, so I'll let you drive the
conversation. Yeah.

Okay. So I guess like, you were never a big
runner growing up. So I guessI'd love to talk about your
athletic journey. So you Oh, youalways said sports with me. Um,
and then I think at one pointyou got really into wanting to

(21:57):
work out wanting to I don't wantto say be healthy because it was
more than that. Like you alwayswere very attentive to like, if
you went into something you wentin 110%. So I remember, one time
you started counting yourcalories. You were going like
doing these workout regimens. Inyour experience. What was kind

(22:20):
of the like, what's your what'syour early relationship with
sports? And when did it start totransition to this very serious
side of yourself that you thatyou've become now?

i In short, I don't know. I? Yeah, we played
baseball, and I hated baseball.
And we did a YSL. And I hated awhy so soccer, did you soccer.
And I never really enjoyed it.
But I think I really startedliking sports. Probably, like

(22:54):
high school soccer, when it wasabout hanging out with like, the
team. You know, I enjoyed thecamaraderie of it more than I
enjoyed the sport itself,because I was shit. I mean, I
was shit at soccer. But I, whatI really had fun with was when I

(23:16):
started hanging out with likeJake, and Garrett and Brandon
and Johnny, Jr, a little bitJunior and into senior year of
high school. That's, that's whenit became fun. And I ended up
being a captain, not because Iwas good at soccer, but because
I was good at organizing people.
And it really was just a goodmorale guy. I was just glue guy

(23:38):
for the team. So I offerednothing in terms of talent, but
I offered a lot in terms oflike, morale and fun and
organization. And, and I ransome of the running workouts.
But that's when I really startedtaking my health more seriously
and considering fitness assomething that I enjoyed. And it

(23:59):
really was a matter of just likelabeling myself as someone who
works out, you know, and once Imake that switch of I am this
kind of person, then I can'tundo it, because I've tied it in
so closely with my identity. Youknow, so like, I am the kind of

(24:23):
person that wakes up at 5amThat's what I do. And now for
the rest of my life. I can't notdo that. Because that's, that's
part of who I am. So, I haveinter woven fitness and going to
the gym and running and eatinghealthy like as part of my

(24:46):
identity, my persona.

So what So you said like what got you into
sports was the camaraderie ofit, you know, the socialization
aspect. A lot of people I thinkdo sport and don't know how many
calories are in a chickenbreast. And so like, what was
your turn from? So you said youweren't very good at soccer. So

(25:11):
obviously, like you weren'tlike, I don't remember you
working, like on your, you know,dribbling skills in the back
yard. Yeah. Because I nevercared about. So what was the
transition from like, okay, sothis is a social thing to this
is becoming a part of mypersonality. I

think that's why I was never good at soccer. I
think I was always better atmanaging, like, treating it as
something that kept me healthy.
And, and I cared more aboutthat. And I've said this before,
a million times. But ifanything's worth doing, it's
worth overdoing. And so like,the second that I identified as

(25:51):
someone who likes to stayhealthy and remain healthy, you
bet your ass I'm gonna do itlike 110%. Yeah. So that's when
I started, like counting mycalories, understanding how to
work out properly, understandinghow to run properly, and doing
all of those things to ensurethat I can be as healthy as
possible. And even like, withthis marathon thing we can get

(26:15):
here, but like, I'm doing I'mnoticing that I'm doing the same
exact thing. Yeah.

Oh, we're gonna get we're gonna Yeah. I want to
go back because I because I'mdriving. Yeah, I'm driving us.
We're gonna I'm in the backseat,you can cut this out. But I am
curious. Do you think the hyperfixation on you being healthy
stems from you at one point inyour life not being healthy?
Because there's a lot in yourlife where I think like, you're

(26:44):
good at organizing people. Andthere's a lot where you're like,
I can be in control of this andyour grading control. You are
always I feel like finding whatyou can control and mastering
that. Yeah. So that's anindependent thing.

I mean, maybe it goes back to when I was not so
healthy.

I was talking about you being like, I'm not
like,

yeah, no, no, no, no, I know. But yeah, I think
maybe it does go back to there.
And that's, but that was so longago that this is just how I've
like lived

life. Yeah. You can't necessarily trace it to
those beginnings or you don'tactively do that. No, I do want
to clarify. Harry pulls me offbecause he is the type of person
that will eat and this is beforehe started working out. He would
eat a chocolate cake, a wholechocolate cake Matilda level of

(27:39):
chocolate cake so and he wouldlose six pounds. And I would
look at a salad and fear andgain 15 And that's just it's
annoying. You just I just Harryhas he eats so healthy. He has a
sweet tooth like no other personI have met on this earth he

(28:02):
could down a box of chocolatechip cookies. You've said this
before on the podcast. It's justnuts to man. Because no one I
don't think people know thisabout you. That you have just
this incredible Sweet Toothcould people look at your your
machine like what what fuels themachine? And I'm like, it used
to be chocolate chip cookies.
And he was just a he had it. Hehad less muscle.

Yeah, no, I have the nastiest Sweet Tooth ever. I
love cookies. I love sweets. AndI love chocolate. So but I've
been honestly really good aboutnot eating that.

I know. And that's what pisses me off. And it
because like I liked. I likedwhen we'd have Christmas
cookies, the reminder that youwere human when you went off,
started getting into really whenyou started working out. I liked
the reminder that you were

doing Christmas cookies are those anything? This

would be gone.
Peanut Butter blossoms.

Ah does it Marcy's peanut butter blossoms.
Wow.

There's so good.
Anyways, so that was the startof you kind of getting into
working out. And I think whenyou first started working out
you really liked going to thegym. Like I really a guy

enjoy the gym. I love the gym. I really loved it.
What do you like about the gym?
I like the gym because it washonestly, I stopped I ran a
little bit and then my jointsjust hurt. So I stopped running
a lot. And then I started goingto the gym and it was a lower
impact thing that I could do.

(29:42):
Well, no backtrack. Put that inreverse. Let's put it in
reverse. So soccer, thenCrossFit. Chrome. Remember I had
a CrossFit Steve.

Oh, of course I remember.

And so I got really into CrossFit. And that
was really an awesome blend oflike community and working out
super hard. But it was just toohard for me it was like people
were thrown around weight. And Icouldn't like my body didn't
like it was

because they were probably going around as much as
you wait,

yeah, oh easy.
But what was really good aboutCrossFit for me is that when
you're doing that, and if you'rein a good CrossFit gym, they
teach you proper form of how todo things. And so CrossFit, the
training associated with that,once I just decided like, this
is too much, this is too highimpact for me, then it was a

(30:40):
really good transition intoentering the gym with proper
form, then instead of going toCrossFit, I would just go to the
gym. And that was awesome. ThatI really enjoyed. Because it was
one of those things where Icould wake up super early in the
morning, I could go to the gym,I could feel incredible about
myself, for the rest of the day.

(31:04):
It's like, it's time by myself,where I don't have to talk to
anyone. And I don't really haveto think about anything that I
don't need to think about. It'sjust like me time.

See that. So enter, because you you said you
really liked about the CrossFitgym, the community behind it.

I don't know why I stopped liking the community
aspect of it.

Was that something you stopped liking? Because my
least favorite part about thegym is that there are other
people at the gym?

Well, yeah, I'm still in contact with some
people from the CrossFit gym. Idon't know when working out for
me, turned into something that Ireally liked doing alone. But
that is now changing back into acommunity thing. Running. So can
you Yeah, just interest we canget into this later.

Oh, I definitely want to I'm just I'm you and I
never sat and talked about ourjourney. Because I never thought
about I never. And I'm reallycurious about because I watched
you do all these things withdisgust? Because it's gross.
That's a joke. But I'm justcurious about, you know, how you

(32:13):
got to here. And I think that's,that's important for me. It's

just for me, it's just been trial and error of
like, what am I really enjoying?
And how can I do more of it? Andhow can I do it? The best way
possible? How can I do it theright way? Well,

it seems to hit those certain notches in your
brain that you just need totick. Because it's like there's
so you're going to the gym,there's a form that you can get
better at. There is a level ofpain that I know you love. You
say you're not Catholic, but youlike paying like a Catholic,
which is interesting. And you'relike, let's suffer a little bit.

(32:50):
There's no there's that there'slike that growth mindset that I
think the gym offers. And it's,and it results in you being
healthy. And I think you presentit that way. But there's those
miniscule things, those boxes totick, that I think you really
love. And that's beeninteresting to hear you talk

(33:11):
about it provides

me with a sense of controlled structure in my
life control that I think Ineed. Like I I require it when I
broke my collarbone and couldn'tgo to the gym. I was losing my
mind. It's

really an outlet for you. Yeah, it is.

And it's, it's, it's great for me mentally. You
know. So I think I reallyappreciate the dedication that I
put in to fit Yeah.

Yeah, well, I want to I there's one more thing I
want to talk about, you can cutthis but I am curious, because
this is about us having aconversation not about that. I
don't think about that. When youyou would go to the gym with
people, and more like like Jacobyou mentioned, or like some of
the soccer friends more or lessenjoyable.

It depends on what else is going on in my
life. You know, and there weretimes when I would go to the gym
with other people. And reallythink about like, Man, I kind of
want to just do this by myself.
But I've now gotten good atsaying no to that. So an example
over Christmas break. I wasrunning a lot with Jacob. And it

(34:30):
was the day before my Coloradointerview. And I said Listen,
man, like, I just kind of wantto get this done by myself. And
so I use that time alone to justclear my head and think through
things that I needed to thinkthrough without someone else
there. So it depends on whatelse is going on. And what I

(34:50):
need to think about. It's

really become a mindfulness thing for you it
sounds like which I think is areally a Interesting fact that
in contrast to how I look at,like my mindfulness stuff, so
which we can end the podcastwith, so Okay, so you're going
to the gym. You never reallywere a runner. When and why did

(35:16):
you start running again?

Because I moved to Boston told myself that I'd
run the half marathon. Oh,really?

So this is a goal this this, because you were
like, I'm gonna run. Okay. Yeah,that's like the myths here. I
don't know why I expectedsomething different. This

started out of complete ignorance for how hard
running was. And then I startedtraining for the half not having
any idea how to do it. And themost I had run before the half
was four miles. My first halfwas four miles, and I was
hurting. I was in pain after itafter the four miles. And so I

(35:56):
was like, yes, tripling this isgoing to be awesome. So but then
day of the race, I had alreadysigned up, I already put the
money down. I might as well justshow up and try and do it. Yeah.
So I did it. And I was fun.
That's why you started running.
I started running because Imoved to Boston. And I said,
Boston equals running. I need torun. Yeah, that's why I started

(36:17):
running. Re

I don't even Okay, so it was just you being you
being Yeah, wouldn't this becool?

Yeah, it was like, I this is something I can
do. So did

when you started running? Yeah.

Oh, yes. I think I still hate it. Okay, that's
very you too. But it goes backto the if anything's worth doing
it's worth overdoing. Right, Iran the half. And I got into my
head that I could run the full,because I didn't want to do
anything half. So I was like,alright, well, I got to run a
full marathon at some point.
And, and it just kind of fellinto my lap that Riley started

(36:55):
running, he signed up for thehalf. And then we learned that
you can run for Boston, throughcharity. This training block, I
think I'm on week 12 Now oftraining for the marathon. And I
hate running, but I loveeverything around it. Explain

that. So like what's your day? Like? How do
you? How do you what depends

on which day and that's what's so fun. Because
I've had to refine everythingelse in my life. It's been like
a nice little shuffle of becausewhen I was just going to the
gym, I had it so down to a teethat it was completely mindless.
But then I added running intothis. And I had to switch up how
I was working out and what I wasworking out what days so that I

(37:44):
could accommodate a longer run.
And I thought that I could liftand run every day. Boy, was I
wrong because my body shut downfor a little bit. And, and I was
just in pain for for about aweek straight after the mileage
had increased too drastically.

(38:05):
And I was still lifting. So I'vehad to readjust it. And it's
been fun to see how much I cando without overdoing and
adjusting my schedule. So whatdoes my day look like? It
depends on what kind of day itis like, today, I went to the
gym. And I lifted, it was a pushday. So I did chest shoulders

(38:27):
tries. And this afternoon, aftermy new shoes are coming in my
new running shoes are coming in,I'm gonna go run like a short
slow five miles. And that'sgonna be like a recovery five
miles, because I'm excited aboutmy new shoes. And then I have to
run 20 Miles tomorrow, but Iwon't go to the gym tomorrow.
And then Sunday, I'll do like alight recovery day, like 30

(38:51):
minutes of zone to cardio, justto get the legs moving and
pushing some blood throughthrough the legs that are going
to be exhausted after this 20miles. And then I'll stretch.
And this whole process hasforced me to think about working
hard, but also recovering justas hard as I work. Hmm. And

(39:12):
that's been fun as well. So Istretch for 20 minutes every
night. And I really prioritizesleep. Not that I didn't do that
before. But I now understandlike, how vital it is to sleep
well so that I can run 20 milesthe next day so that I can get
on the bike and do that the dayafter it all compounds. Yeah,

so you've just kind of roped everything into
this goal of yours. Yeah, allaspects of your life. How do you
so this seems like an allconsuming thing. And I am
curious how do you fit in workinto this day and school and to
this day, you know, like whattakes precedent like how does
all of this fits your life?
That's part of the fun God likethe little rather brain is like

(39:56):
yeah, it's

that's part of the fun. It's like, how can I
get all of this stuff into thisday? Yeah, how can I wake up
early in the morning and get myrun out of the way, and then be
ready for what I have to dothroughout the whole day, and
then have enough time and nightsthat I can stretch and go to bed
and get a good sleep and do itall again. Okay. It's all very

(40:19):
fun. And I love it. And this issomething that I'm gonna say,
like, if anything's worth doing,it's worth overdoing. So there
are these like running gels thatyou can get that provide you
carbohydrates on your run,because you're burning, like 100
calories. Well, I don't know howmany calories you burn, I'll

(40:40):
burn like 1200 calories on the10 mile run. So I burned a lot
of calories. And you need to befueling during these runs. And
there's chemistry involved inthis as well. So some of these
things, Bill, some of thesecompanies, they'll sell you like
this carbohydrate mix, and I waslike, Well, I'm not gonna buy
the carbohydrate mix. So I'mjust gonna make my own. So I

(41:00):
bought maltodextrin andfructose. And I've been I was
testing different ratios ofmulti dextran to fructose to mix
into a bottle. Well, I run nowI've settled on one part, multi
dextran 2.8 parts of fructose,which gives me about 40 grams of
carbs. So that's 22 grams ofmalted extra and 17.7 grams of

(41:23):
fructose, which is about 40grams of carbs, which is about
what I need for an hour run.
Wow. So I made my own stuff.
It's it's all it's all. It's allgreat for me.

I don't know. This isn't how I thought this is
gonna go. I didn't realize youhave this down to such a
science. And it was I know,that's fun for you know, I got
it. That's how I

do everything. I didn't know it's it. If people
listen to the coffee episode,like, yeah, it's, it's, it's all
the same behaviors. And it mightbe a problem. Sure. But it's all
the same, like kind of thing.
And I just apply that toeverything that I'm interested
in passionate about in light.
Yeah. And it's the same thingthat I do with work. And the

(42:12):
same thing that I do in school,and just you

connect work and school to running, I guess it's
like, I know that they'reinterconnected, because it's all
in a day, do you? I mean, Iguess it's your mindset behind
it all. That's like, No,

I don't I when I'm working out, I'm working
out. And when I'm in school, I'min school. And sometimes I'll
use running as time to thinkabout other things and like what
I need to do and how I need toplan my day, but I really don't
tie them together at all. And Ithink that's necessary. The
compartmentalization of it all.
You're

so good at compartmentalizing. Yeah,

I try. I really try.

What, um, what do you think about what you run?

Well, I used to run with headphones and music.
And then I stopped doing that.
Don't say silence. I don'tlisten to anything. Oh, God. I
just go. You're a serial killer.
No, it's, it's it's okay, mightnot be normal, but it's really

(43:18):
valuable time for me.

Okay. Why?

Because I'm not focused on listening to music,
and I'm not even listening to apodcast. I'm just like, it's
very introspective. Okay. Andit's time that I don't really
otherwise have

30 And just about yourself, are you thinking about
life? You said, You're notthinking about work?

I try not to think about work. It's not
directed. And that's why I thinkit's so valuable. Because you
just kind of let your mindwander. You're getting into
flow. That's what you're doing.
Yeah. Okay. You just kind of letyour mind wander and go where it
needs to go. And oftentimes, itwill land on the most important
thing that you need to thinkabout.

Okay, this I can understand. Yeah, because I
when, yay. So it's likemeditative.

Yeah, it really is. It's awesome. It's great. So
you need to

be running 20 miles to silence your brain.

No, not 20. But like, a good a good eight, eight
to 12 miles. I come back and Ifeel so much better after. And
like on Wednesday, I wantednothing more than to get home
from class and leave and go on arun. Because I just had too much

(44:46):
on my back. I had way too muchon my shoulders. And I couldn't
get out and go for a run becauseI had a million things to do for
work. But I know that if I hadgone for a run I would have felt
much better after rushed anothertime. Yeah. But it Yeah, I
listened to him laughing becauseit lets my mind wander in it. It
sort of helps me center myself.

How does running compared to the gym?

It's different in the gym is is more of an intense
like, push, push, push, go gogo. Yeah. Whereas running is is
more meditative as you said.

There's like a there's like an enlightened
Terry that came that is existingin Boston that I never knew
before. But I mean, are yourunning is a part of it? No know
like you are always just like aGO GO GO GO GO GO GO person. And
at some point you you startedreading books. And you became

(45:48):
that's that's my joking way ofsaying you became very
introspective. You're like,dude, have you read this book?
I'm like, I don't even thoughyou could read.

And

and you've started becoming very introspective. You
started journaling. And itsounds like running has been a
big part of that. I did thathappen naturally Did you meet?

I mean, I've journaled I've journaled for
years. So that's not new. Right.
I have I have journals goingback to like, senior year of
high school. Wow, I

didn't okay, I didn't know that. Yeah, that was
so that's not new. Were they asintrospective? Are you telling
me that? I'm like that yourreview? You've revealed this
side of yourself to me, but it'snot. It's not new? No,

I think it's just progressively me getting older
and growing. Okay. But I think Ihave applied the same principles
that I applied everything toreading and to trying to be
interesting.

You definitely have. Yeah, you you have
approached being introspectivein a very militaristic way.
Right? Like,

with with, but with my kind of intensity that
Yeah, I like,

you're like a German, you're like from 12 to
1230. I will be introspective asit is just like you're just
sitting there at your desk likestaring just being

very

introspective.
It's like 1230 hits, like,alright, that's, we're done with
that. But

it's the compartmentalization. And that's
what works for me.

It's that personal discipline that I think is
really interesting. Yeah, I lovediscipline. Yeah. And that's,
that's a really big thing. Andthat's something that I can
never understand. In you, youknow, because

I hold myself to the highest standard that nobody
else can hold me to. Yeah, I amharder on myself than anyone
else could possibly be. Yeah.
And I have to be disciplined inthat discipline has to be
internal. Because then I won't,if, if, if I'm not internally

(47:58):
disciplined, then I woulddisappoint myself. So I hate
disappointing myself. Yeah.

So so that's a very isolationist mindset to
what you're doing. So like,you're gonna run 20 miles. And
if you don't do that, you'lldisappoint yourself, because
that's what you have set up inyour plan. Tomorrow. You said
that you've started getting in acommunity running is very much a
community, from my understandingof it. It's like, you know,
like, rock climbing, skiing, youknow, there are these

(48:32):
communities. And marathonrunning is actually a different
community, unlike trail running.
And you know, there's like sex.
How did the mindfulness aspectof running come to you
organically and in, in, in, in,in an individual sets? Or did it

(48:52):
come from being introduced topeople that look at running as
very much that kind of likemindfulness, I don't want to say
like, there's like a lot ofgranola bars, but you look at
them and they are then it'slike, I think it's hard to be
around those people. Like when Igot a snowboarding lesson. I
said, dude, a lot because he wasjust the name was Riley was very

(49:15):
chill. And I felt like I wasback in high schools, like
snowboarding with my bossdollar, just like messing around
and my vocab like, my, my, mymindset changed. Yeah. How has
that influenced your progressionwith running? Maybe it hasn't?
Yeah,

if anything, I started the whole running
journey alone. And I've onlyrecently been introduced to this
community of running. So I'm notsure that I've had enough
exposure to the community ofrunning to sort of absorb
anything that's going on thereyet. Because of this just

(49:52):
started with the marathontraining, and not even the first
couple of weeks of marathontraining like it started
probably week four. five or sixof marathon training. And so
I've only been running withpeople on long runs for eight
weeks,

is that something you're excited about? Is that
something that you're just like?
Well, this is you know what itis, or,

you know, it's, it's, it's, it's fun, especially
being in Boston, because when wego out tomorrow, and we run a
lot of the marathon course, sowe'll run 10 miles out of the
course, and 10 miles back of thecourse. And along that course,
it will be nothing but runners.
There is sort of something, somenet that you feel supporting you

(50:38):
from the running community ofBoston, which is neat, which is
why I originally wanted to startrunning the Boston half marathon
in the first place. Because Iassociated Boston with running.
And it's

almost like a weird, so I guess it's

it's very, yeah.
I mean, the Boston Marathon islike a legendary marathon.

i Yeah, but like Boston is a legendary city for
so many reasons. I just think itlike says a lot about you, that
you associated with themarathon.

I think of the marathon is something that is
super attainable. You know, it'sa hard goal, but I like it
because it's hard. Yeah. And,and the future of my fitness
journey. I'm afraid I probablycaught this bug. And I don't see

(51:33):
myself stopping anytime soon.
Like, this will not be my lastmarathon. I will probably end up
doing an ultra marathon. I willprobably end up doing Iron Man's
if I if I can start to swim andbike and triathlons. Like I just
see myself kind of doing it allbecause it scratches all of
those little issues that wetalked about. For me. Yeah.

So that's so interesting.

It's fun, and it keeps me very grounded. Where
the rest of my life tends to bescattered. And, you know, I try
to give it order.

But this is a you I think, you you're like a
filter that takes outwardthings, channels them into you,
and then gives them order on theother side.

I like the order.

Yeah.

I like the order.
I love structure. And this wasjust another thing that I can
do.

That gets that done. Does the fact that you
were running, philanthropicallyinspire you more not at all?
Like, is it something you thinkabout a lot? You're like, proud
that you're doing it? For aphilanthropic purpose? Yeah. Is
it just kind of like your wayin? That's cut this out?

No, no, no, I'll keep it in. Because I have an
interesting relationship withthe way that I think about it.
It was It is a great way to berunning Boston marathon for
something that I care deeplyabout, and something that's sort
of intertwined with my future.
Yeah, but some part of me can'thelp. But I feel like I'm a
fraud. Right? knew a marathon,because I don't have a goddamn

(53:24):
qualifying time. I'm so happyand so grateful that I that I'm
on this team, and running forfor charity and fundraising
money that will benefit a lot oflives. But God damn it, I will
fucking qualify for the BostonMarathon at some other point in
my life, and I will run a subthree hour marathon, if it kills

(53:45):
me. Because I have to feel likeI'm doing it. I don't want to
say right, but like, I have toqualify for the Boston Marathon.

Right? Okay.
That's what I thought. Yeah.
Like, I thought you'd be like,the cars. Amazing. It fuels me
however.

Yeah, it's true.
It's like, I don't know. I wantto do it. Right.

I will say doing it right. Is Here I go. Here I'm
about to sit. Doing it right isnot necessarily qualifying.
Because I think what you have toask is doing something, right is
what you're doing it for andwhile you're getting it, so if
you're doing it for getting theright time. I guess that's fine.

(54:38):
But like running in the BostonMarathon, there is not a wrong
way to run in the BostonMarathon. If I was running the
Boston Marathon, which I wouldnever do, because I hate
running, I would walk amarathon. I love walking, but I
wouldn't follow the path. I'dlike Oh, this looks good. This
one is fine. But I think doingit philanthropically. What

(55:00):
fulfill me more than getting aqualifying time. Because you're
still hitting a benchmark, doyou know that you had to raise
$7,000? And you raise $7,000?
Going? Well, not yet going. Thatis going towards a good cause.
Yeah. And in some ways, I thinkthat's the right way.

Yeah. But I don't I still to this day, don't see
it that way. I do not considermyself a runner. Right. You
know, like I'm running, but I'mnot a runner. I

wrote a book. I don't consider myself a writer.
So I get that. Yeah.

I don't know.
They're there. Like I said,there is that part of me that
will eventually qualify for theboss. Yeah. And then I'll run it
again. And it'll feel different.
It'll feel like I'm

so interested in.
And we don't have time to talkabout this. But at some point, I
really want to talk about themindfulness aspect of it,
because I thought you were like,total grind boy, like growth
mindset about the running, whichyou are. But there is a
mindfulness aspect to it that Ireally relate to, in a totally
different way. And I'd love totalk about the way you and I

(56:09):
find rest. Because I think like,and see I hate admitting this
because I'm reading this bookthat was recommended to me,
called MC mindfulness, about howthe West completely like,
monopolized and commercializedthis idea of like, like, Eastern
mindfulness, so Buddhism, andmeditation, and now I'm like, I

(56:34):
hate. I hate overthinking aboutthis, because that, you know,
has been such a big part of mylife since I was a kid, like,
tried to do the meditation, likethe religious aspect of it. But
now I'm like psychoanalyzingmyself, it's like, Am I just an
asshole? I don't know. But theway you describe running is very
much the way I like to, I loveto get into that Zen state.

(57:01):
Because I can get into flow.
When I write writing a paper, Icould do a 10 page paper, I wake
up, and then I'm like, No, I didit. I love getting the flow.
Getting into flow is my favoritething. Meditating is different
for me a little bit, because Idon't have an agenda. When I'm

(57:23):
getting it to flow with writing,I have a goal. And it's about
finding that goal. I oncedescribed writing an academic
paper as like, carving a statue,because you, you have this rough
idea, but you really have to getinto the trenches. And it is
worth as you know, your car,each word, you're figuring out.

(57:46):
So like, when I get into flowwith writing, or you know, like,
and I'll allow myself to exploreand experience but it's in it's
like this artistic or whatever.
When I meditate, it's me tryingto silence my brain, which is so
seldom going slow, because I'mconstantly anxious. Is and it's

(58:06):
allowing my brain to freely andslowly wander from place to
place, which is so helpful andfreeing. And I, you know, I
opened my eyes, and it is, like,I feel centered. And I wonder if
that's how you feel after like,a good run or something.

Yeah, like,

I feel grounded. I feel connected to life again, in
a way that when I'm just livingmy normal, chaotic life, I feel
like I'm tethered, but barely.
And then Meditation allows me tofeel grounded. Yeah,

I would say it's a similar, it's a similar way.
It's it, but it's a differentfeeling than running. You know,
I am

sure it hits us rattling but

yeah, it's it's a different feeling. Because I
think when you run and finish atough run like that, you've done
something very hard. And, andit's, it's this instant
gratification of I just didthat. And I feel really proud of
myself for having done that.
Whereas meditation, yes, it'shard. But I don't want to say

(59:30):
it's like running 15 nose. Yeah,you know, it's it's a different
it's a different kind ofgrounding and centering
yourself. And feeling you know.
Yeah. But yeah, we can talkabout that more later. Yeah, I

(59:53):
gotta get back to work.

I got to go do shit. So well. Thanks. i

This was good. I didn't think this was gonna be
Good one. Oh, I put I had fun. I

Jack Weidner (01:00:03):
literally just wanted to talk to you about
this. I had no idea. I was socurious. Because like, I like to
walk and wander and hike andkayak, but I would not God, I've
gone to the gym with you andjust been like, shoot me. Like
you kick my ass at the gym, notlike you do things. You do
things that I can't do, but likeyou just like, you're just like,

(01:00:24):
let's, let's get into Let's getafter a little bit. Boy, that's
good, athletic. And I'm like, Ohmy god. So I'm curious where
that came from.

Harry Weidner (01:00:31):
Yeah. And running, running gives that to
me as well.

I'd love to talk skiing with you sometime too,
because I realized, like, when Iwas talking with Haley, I was
just talking about like, feelingthe mountain in and out of your
edges and like, I'm just like,Oh, God, I want to talk. I want
to see how Harry would teachsomeone how to ski.

I don't think I would teach someone how to ski
very well.

I'm just curious.
Okay. I will wrap it up becauseI have to get back, Harry.
Thanks for chatting.

This is, man,

I had a blast. I don't know how you're gonna
actually cares. But I was socurious. It is so much fun to
hear your mindset. And for me,because I've gotten to watch you
grow so much. It really likehelps me tie up some of the
questions that I have andunderstand you better because
I've watched from an outsider'sperspective, but getting to hear

(01:01:20):
your perspective on thingsreally is just so much fun as
your brother. All right, thanks.
Thanks for sticking around andlistening to this episode. Happy
one year if you've beenlistening since episode one if
you haven't happy one yearanyways. Welcome. Welcome aboard
our MIDI. I don't know why thatwe don't have a pirate. All

(01:01:41):
righty. Thank you for stickingaround. See how this mess
unravels and we'll see you intwo weeks. And don't forget to
email us at artangel minds atease and ominous hammertoes week
everyone

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Episode 24: Running

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