Out Here Tryna Survive
This podcast is a trauma-informed, hope-oriented, safe space. It is a warm hug of solidarity for Black women 35+. It is a celebration of our resilience thus far & our determination to not only survive but THRIVE. Join me, Grace Sandra, a Mama, author, advocate/activist, storyteller, for some good ole self-love shenanigans. We are braver than we believe✨
Episodes
A woman is eight minutes from delivery, screaming through a wheelchair ride, and a nurse is still asking about “live births.” That moment—followed by another mother turned away to give birth on the roadside—sparked a raw, necessary conversation about disbelief, danger, and the cost of bias on Black women’s bodies.
We trace the throughline from the labor ward to the comment section: how joy gets labeled arroga...
A headline asked whether having a boyfriend is embarrassing—and it landed because so many women are done letting public romance define their worth. I take you from “boyfriend land” and early mommy blogging to a new center of gravity where sovereignty, safety, and self-respect lead. As a Gen X Black woman who grew up in church culture, married young, and lived the trad-wife script, I’ve seen how the internet once rewar...
The headline said SNAP might pause, and my stomach dropped. Not because of theory, but because of dinner. What follows is a raw, grounded look at who gets hit first when social safety nets fray—women-led households, elders, disabled neighbors, and children—and how Black women absorb the shock long before it makes the news. I share what it felt like to pencil out November with nothing extra, why “just get a job” ignore...
The moment I stopped needing a relationship, everything changed. After years of pushing through “little t” traumas in the dating pool and holding out hope that the right man would make it all click, a brutal Valentine’s reveal forced a reset. I saw the real pattern: every time I accepted nonchalant energy or waited for potential, I was abandoning myself.
I walk you through the exact shifts that followed—clear...
A high school football game ended with an injury—and a prayer. What came next exposed something bigger than sports: the way covert racism hides behind “safety,” outrage, and the performance of white motherhood. When my short clip of my son praying went viral, the internet rushed to judge a 14-year-old Black boy as a criminal, calling for prison instead of proportionate accountability. We walk through what actually hap...
The feed won’t stop. One more video of a life ending, one more thread turning human pain into content—and our nervous systems keep paying the price. I’m talking frankly about what it’s like to be inundated by violent imagery, how selective empathy fractures trust, and why we need boundaries that protect our peace without blurring our values.
I share personal updates from a year of real healing—therapy, Gabor ...
// The Soft Girl Survival System - https://stan.store/GraceSandra/p/the-soft-girl-survival-system //
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Ever felt like you're hanging by a thread, quietly crumbling while trying to hold it all together? This raw, honest conversation dives into what happens when a Black woman reaches rock bottom—and finds her way back.
I'm sharing my...
Connect with Lily!
Website - https://www.bodyintelligenceacademy.com
IG: https://www.instagram.com/bodyintelligence_academy
Her Medium article- https://medium.com/@lily_56950/love-bombs-and-red-flags-a-story-about-self-trust-703e50041bbc
What happens when two women discover they've been manipulated by the same man? In this raw, intimate conversation, we meet Lily - a woman who had a brief encounter with th...
Have you ever watched a show that unexpectedly cracked your heart open? That's what happened when I watched Netflix's "Forever" - and I'm still processing all the feelings it brought up.
This adaptation of Judy Blume's 1975 novel follows two Black teenagers in 2018 Los Angeles through their experiences of first love. But what struck me most powerfully were the parents - particula...
"Why didn't she just leave?" It's a question that reveals how profoundly we misunderstand the dynamics of abuse. Drawing from personal experience as both a childhood sexual abuse survivor and domestic violence survivor, I'm pulling back the curtain on why this question hurts victims and protects abusers.
The truth is that leaving an abusive relationship isn't simply a matter of w...
The journey to inner peace often begins in unexpected ways. For me, it started with a desperate search for financial independence while trapped in an abusive marriage. In 2018, I turned to meditation not for spiritual enlightenment but because successful people in an MLM claimed it helped them make money. What began as a practical pursuit transformed into the cornerstone of my healing journey.
That first 45-m...
When Tracy Ellis Ross mentioned dating younger men, she faced an immediate wave of criticism and bizarre comparisons to Shannon Sharp – a man facing multiple sexual assault allegations. This glaring double standard perfectly illustrates the misogynoir Black women face when simply discussing their dating preferences.
As a 48-year-old Black woman navigating modern dating, I deeply relate to Tracy's perspec...
That voice inside your head telling you something feels off? It might be your inner child trying to protect you from making painful mistakes. In this deeply personal episode, I share how a seemingly perfect romantic connection triggered a surprising healing journey that saved me from potential heartbreak.
After 20 years of marriage followed by dating in my 40s, I found myself experiencing an electric connecti...
What happens when you walk the opposite path of the "influencer to evangelical pipeline"? As someone who spent 16 years as a minister with a nearly-completed Master's of Divinity, my journey away from evangelicalism toward a more liberated spirituality offers a powerful counternarrative to what we often see in today's culture.
The evangelical world I inhabited taught me I was fundamentally...
Black women across America are drawing boundaries and prioritizing self-care as they "quiet quit" a country that has historically demanded their emotional labor while offering little in return. This revolutionary act of self-preservation represents a profound shift in how Black women approach their relationship with America.
• Recognizing the roots of the "strong Black woman" trope and its...
The accusations of narcissism against Meghan Markle have reached a fever pitch, but do any of them hold water? As someone who survived severe narcissistic abuse and later coached other survivors, I bring a uniquely qualified perspective to this conversation.
When researching my previous episode about Meghan's new ventures, I discovered an entire ecosystem of content dedicated to labeling her a narcissist...
When you strip away the noise surrounding Meghan Markle's Netflix show "With Love Megan," what emerges is a powerful narrative about a woman reclaiming her identity after trauma. Before becoming a royal, Meghan had a lifestyle blog and philanthropic pursuits that she was forced to abandon. Now, freed from those constraints, she's returned to her authentic creative self—and it's beautiful to wi...
Have you ever felt like life knocked you flat, leaving you to start over when everyone else seems firmly established? You're not alone in that journey of rebuilding.
At 48, I found myself making just $10,000 a year after once having a stable career, retirement savings, and a home. The crushing weight of feeling "behind" where society says I should be had me questioning my worth on the darkest d...
What if you could transform your harsh inner critic into a voice of warmth and understanding? Join me, Grace Sandra, on a heartfelt exploration of self-compassion, where I reveal the deeply personal journey that shifted my perspective from self-criticism to self-kindness. Through this episode, we unpack common misconceptions surrounding self-compassion and learn how it can be a practical, daily practice, especially fo...
Can a powerful group of women change the political landscape of a nation? In this episode, I explore how Black women have consistently been at the forefront of political activism in the United States. With the startling statistic of 92% of Black women supporting Doug Jones in Alabama, I delve into the critical role they play in pushing back against alarming executive actions. As part of our discussion, I bring to ligh...
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