May 30, 2024 • 29 mins
In today’s episode Christine Blosdale embarks on a journey into the world of equine-assisted life coaching. Joining her is renowned Transformational Life Coach, Sue Willoughby, a true pioneer in harnessing the profound wisdom and healing power of horses.
By partnering with these majestic creatures, Sue guides clients through a deeply immersive experience that unlocks hidden emotional barriers and fosters profound self-discovery.
Join Christine and Sue as they explore the extraordinary bond between humans and horses, and discover how these magnificent animals can help you unleash your inner strength, resilience, and potential.
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To learn more about Sue Willoughby and her equine-assisted coaching, visit http://www.willoughbycoaching.com. To learn more about Christine Blosdale and her coaching programs visit http://www.ChristineBlosdale.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
So the horses are very intuitive they will present what
the person is putting out that they don't
even know that they're putting out so they act as a really an amazing
mirror to what is really happening
because they can sense incongruency they can
sense they sense our biorhythms i mean they
(00:23):
know how fast your heart is beating so if someone
is standing there saying oh I'm not afraid I'm good I'm good and the horse is
like oh hell no I'm just gonna stand over here until you're done and you can
be you know congruent with what's what's really going on inside and when the
person relaxes settles down and comes into their body the horse will come right over.
(00:45):
Music.
Welcome to Out of The Box With Christine. Are you willing to step into your greatness?
Are you ready to shine? Well get ready truth seeker you're in for an amazing
(01:09):
ride. And now, here's the host of the show,
Christine Blosdale.
Music.
Welcome back to Out of the Box with Christine. I am your host, Christine Blosdale,
your expert authority business coach, helping my clients get the word out on
(01:31):
their business through podcasting and TikToks and videos and their websites
and all that great stuff.
And today I am very excited to have a very special guest with me joining me today, Sue Willoughby.
And Sue is an equine-assisted transformational life coach.
And if you're like saying to yourself, what the heck is that?
(01:55):
Matt, this is really awesome.
And I can't wait to jump into this because I love these gorgeous animals and
you work with them on the daily with your clients.
So we're going to jump right into it. Sue, welcome to Out of the Box with Christine.
Thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited to be here.
And speaking of Out of the Box, right?
(02:16):
You know, when you tell people that you're a life coach, they're expecting probably,
they're thinking of you sitting on a Zoom call with a client and saying,
you know, you can do it and we can overcome these obstacles and where are you stuck in life right now?
And that's about it. But your coaching is quite a bit different, is it not?
(02:39):
It is. It is. Now I can do all of that stuff. And I do do do all of that stuff. You said do do.
Do do. Oh, careful language.
But the the thing that sets my coaching apart is that I have a partner.
And my partner is a four legged animal that weighs about 1200 pounds.
And I can also use minis and I can use ponies, I can use anything.
(03:05):
But I do work with horses, primarily, primarily because they're amazingly intuitive.
And how did you get started with this? I mean, did you experience this yourself
or was it just your relationship with horses for a long time?
And you said, oh my goodness, there's a light bulb moment going on.
(03:27):
A little bit of everything. Horses have always been in my life.
I remember when I was a little kid and your parents put you to bed before it
gets dark out and you're just sitting there like, it's daylight. What am I doing here?
And I managed to get up out of bed and I peered out the window and there were
two horses drinking from my kiddie pool in the backyard.
And I'm like, I came screaming out of my bedroom. I'm like, oh my God,
(03:48):
you put me to bed early so you could bring my horses over.
And they're just like, no, that is not what's happening here.
So, but they've all horses have always just, just been in my life.
And I didn't really realize how therapeutic they were
to me personally until later
in life and I'm like oh yeah putting those dots connecting those dots but when
(04:10):
I was I think 19 I quit my job I saw an ad in the paper that's when we did have
ads in the paper and it was for a summer counselor at a special.
Special ed camp basically and they needed
a horse person to work with in therapeutic
riding I didn't even know what that was but I'm like yeah I'm in so I wrote
(04:32):
him a letter hand wrote them a letter put it in the mailbox waited for the reply
and I had the best summer of my life I met people that are in my life now that
I've known for gosh probably over 40 years and it was just amazing.
We had a little herd of horses and we would do, you know, therapeutic riding
(04:53):
and it was amazing. It was incredible.
So that was kind of my, my entry into horse healing and horse therapy.
I love that. I remember when I was, I think it might've been junior high school.
I was lucky enough to do some English writing.
(05:14):
It was from a private school where we were able to access horses.
And I did a little bit of the English writing. And at that facility,
they would have children with different disabilities.
They would come and they would have, you know, get to be on a horse and experience
(05:35):
either just riding around the ring or just being with them.
And I think I remember vividly a young blind girl who was just lit up like a
Christmas tree when she got to be with the horse. And they were so gentle.
That was the thing, because I was like, that's a very large animal.
(05:57):
That could cause some harm at some point.
But they were so gentle with these children and it was something to witness. It really was.
So I could see how that would get you, you know, get you into that, into that world.
Now with what, with what you do.
(06:17):
It's not necessarily someone is riding a horse, correct? There's no riding.
Yeah, no riding. Talk about this. No riding experience.
So what happens in a session? The horse is at liberty, meaning that it doesn't
have a halter or a lead rope.
The horse is free to roam about the arena or the round pen, whatever facility that we're in.
(06:39):
And the client is in the arena with the horse.
And I asking them questions I have them set an intention when they first go
in so something that they want to work on something that they want to you know
take away from the the session.
And then I've given them safety demo and I've also shown them a couple of ways
(07:01):
to interact with the horse so that they're not totally you know out there not knowing what to do do?
Now what do I do? And then I just let them be and let them be with the horse.
I let them interact with the horse.
And while they're interacting, I may ask them questions and,
or I may, I'm usually just observing what the horse is doing.
(07:26):
And I'm also observing what the client is doing and what they're saying and what their behavior is.
And then I'm watching the horse And then I'm watching them and then I'm like, okay, hmm.
Okay. That gives me an opportunity to ask a coaching question,
an open-ended question or, or whatever.
I had a client that was actually wanted, felt better and wanted the horse on the lead.
(07:46):
And they were leading the horse around the arena and the horse was just,
you know, kind of nipping at their, at their shoulder and at their arm.
And I said, are you okay with that? And they're like, yeah, it's okay. It's okay.
And So I said, okay, well, let's just keep working. And it persisted to the
(08:07):
point where I said, okay, let's just stop for a second. And I said, what's going on here?
Oh, the horse is just, you know, trying to get my attention. I said, okay.
Can we talk about boundaries a little bit?
Is there a time in your life or when you're out, you know, in your real life
where things like this happen, where things or people or stuff comes into your
(08:29):
space that it may be unwanted? wanted.
And they thought for a minute, they're like, wow, yeah, yeah, there is.
So the horses are very intuitive. They will present what the person is putting
out that they don't even know that they're putting out.
Wow. That's powerful. So they act as a really, an amazing mirror to what is
(08:53):
really happening because they can sense incongruency.
They can sense, they sense our biorhythms. I mean, they know how fast your heart is beating.
So if someone is standing there saying, oh, I'm not afraid. I'm good.
I'm good. And the horse is like, oh, hell no.
I'm just going to stand over here until you're done. And you can be congruent
with what's really going on inside.
(09:15):
And when the person relaxes, settles down, and comes into their body,
the horse will come right over. It's amazing.
It's really incredible. What I find intriguing about that style of coaching,
too, is that you're taking someone out of, I don't want to say their comfort
zone, but out of this thing of, yeah, they're taking them out.
(09:36):
So they're focused on the experience of being with the horse and the sounds
and the, you know, the smells and everything.
Right. And so you're not diverting their attention per se, but you're,
you're having them in a, in a completely unique and different atmosphere.
(09:56):
Atmosphere than being in their cozy little living room or wherever,
or in an office type setting, right? Where we have expectations, right?
This is how it's going to go.
You're putting them in an unusual circumstance where they don't know what is
necessarily going to happen.
And that's really powerful, especially for a life coaching session, right?
(10:21):
Right. Well, that's the beauty of it, because A, they don't know what to expect, right?
The horses are big and the thing that a lot of people say, well,
they've either had a bad experience with a horse and I say bad in air quotes,
they've had an experience with a horse that was probably less than favorable
in their memory, right? And...
(10:43):
They say, well, you know, I'm intimidated by them. They're so big,
they're so powerful. And they are all of that. And then the truth is they're prey animals.
They're 1,200 pound prey animals. They are, the reason that they're so intuitive
is because they're constantly trying to figure out if they're gonna die or not, right? So am I safe?
(11:04):
What is this thing? You know, if it's a plastic bag, oh my God, what's gonna happen?
But they can, you know, ah, is that plastic bag gonna kill me?
They can in you know a heartbeat assess
you know they will sense it they will assess it they can
determine whether they're in danger or not right fight or
flight what are we going to do here and if it's not a threat then they can just
(11:25):
go back to grazing and go back to what they were doing so they're really good
at tuning into themselves and knowing what's around them so that they're they
know if they're safe or not we tend to hang on to a lot of stuff as you all know we We have stories.
We have all kinds of things that we tell ourselves. You know,
if a plastic bag blew across the thing, we'd be talking about it for a month.
(11:47):
Right. But the horse is like, okay, done with that. That's good.
So, you know, it's really interesting
because horses don't judge and they don't lie. They don't judge.
They're just being, just being. And that is what is really so cool about Equus
coaching is that it just, if people
(12:10):
can, or when they can settle into themselves and just be themselves.
It's beautiful. Well, and there's also that connection for, you know,
when you were talking about the horse also being very much aware that,
you know, it could be prey at any moment and sort of checking out the landscape, you know, vigilant.
(12:32):
That's what a lot of people with early childhood issues, early childhood traumas,
or if you were the child of an alcoholic,
you know that feeling of when the door opens, is this going to be good daddy
or bad daddy or angry daddy?
Mommy or bad mommy. Yeah, exactly.
(12:53):
And children who grow up under those circumstances can be hypervigilant and
always scanning the surrounding areas, right?
So I think that that also, even if it's a subconscious connection with the horse,
that's something that people can experience as well.
Maybe they're not even conscious of it, though, that that's happening.
(13:15):
Yeah, you know what?
I've always found horses so absolutely fascinating. And I know for myself,
I also, I need to get back to that connection because I had an odd experience with a horse.
And then later, once I had reviewed it in my mind and my psyche realized that
(13:39):
it absolutely was not the horse's fault.
It was one of these situations where we're around a ring and luckily it was
a soft dirt arena. We're around a ring.
My friend had access to these horses whose other friend said,
we need to ride the horses.
We need to take this exercise. It's like walking a dog, right?
(14:00):
You need to go. So her horse was a real...
Son of a gun and uh would be kick you know my horse would be behind and then
he would be kicking his back legs and mine was so beautiful and so wonderful
and so patient with the whole thing,
and we had we had been walking them for quite some time
or riding them for quite some time and she said do
(14:22):
you want to go let's you want to go one more time around and i
was like i felt the underneath the blanket and you know he was
getting warm a little bit and i said i don't know i think i think he's okay
i think he's good you know and she's like oh come on and i knew and i knew and
she's like come on let's do one more and i said okay so i did that little thing
giddy up you know come on and the horse in front of him did it again kicked
(14:47):
his leg back and my horse just said,
f you all i'm done took off to took off to the edge of the arena and was wanting
to flick me off his back like just get off of me and of course when you're going at full speed.
(15:09):
You want to get i was like oh you want me to get off i will i will gladly get
off but i can't get off until you stop because this is very fast so i just remember
like him going to the edge of the the arena and throwing his shoulder down trying
to flick me off and i said okay so i unsmartingly,
would take my leg out of the stirrup one leg
out of the stirrup right so i've got one leg in and one leg
(15:31):
out and i'm trying to push off i don't know
what i was trying to do watching stunt movies or something and and i ended up
i ended up being like my foot got stuck in the stirrup and i was being dragged
around the arena oh yes i was yeah and of course we didn't have helmets on we
did I didn't have the proper boots. I didn't have anything.
(15:53):
I think I had jeans on, which were shredded. But once I got my foot outside of that, he had...
And I was on the ground. I saw him just raise up and his foot came down,
his foot, his hoof, whatever, came down on my leg. Right.
And I have never experienced that sort of pain before. And...
(16:16):
In the chaos of all of that, what I noticed was when the horse realized he hurt me,
he immediately, it was like he put his head down and slowly walked away and just hung his head like,
(16:37):
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. too.
I'm so sorry. I am so, so sorry. And it was like, immediately I had that compact.
I was like, he was done and I knew he was done.
And, and we had to force our way with this horse who, who was,
who was completely done, but to see his remorse and how sad he was that he had hurt me,
(17:03):
was just mind blowing.
It just, it, it, it changed the whole situation. I didn't even,
I was like, what's that blood? That's nothing. Come on.
What's that bone sticking out there? We can put that right back. That's nothing.
But it was in that moment where I was like, wow, there's, they,
they, they're very much aware of, of, of your feelings and, and,
(17:24):
and that connection to human beings.
Have you had some experiences? Have you had some interesting experience?
Probably not like that one, but something similar. Similar. her.
Yeah. I, I've had a lot of crazy experiences with horses.
I think the first time I came off a horse, I was about five years old and we
run a little trail ride and my pony was like, I'm done totally.
(17:47):
And he started galloping back to the barn and I just came flying off and I was sitting there.
My mom of course was a basket case and she came up on her horse and she is not a rider by by the way.
And I'm sitting on the ground and she thought I was sobbing.
I was laughing hysterically, sitting in a big pile of horse poop,
just cracking up going, let's do that again.
(18:11):
So I've been pretty fortunate up until recently.
With not coming off the horse until last year, I decided to start playing polo
because I'm, why not at 64, right? I like to take those risks.
I was doing really well and I was having fun and we were doing like a little practice chucker.
It's a baby game, not at full speed, thank God. But the thing is,
(18:35):
if you pass the ball, you keep going.
Don't stop. Don't go back. Just keep going. But I got a little greedy and a little aggressive.
And I leaned back to whack the ball with my mallet. And as I did,
I pulled the horse up off the ground.
I came off and I shattered my wrist.
And yeah, it was a good one. I'm laying there. My wrist was all like, that's not right.
(18:57):
That's not right. So we went to the ER and that was last summer.
But I'm back. I'm back. So, I mean, you know, like you said,
they, they take care of themselves. Your horse was done.
He, he was just taking care of himself and he wasn't, you know,
no offense, but he wasn't thinking about you.
He was thinking about the situation he was in and you were just kind of collateral damage.
(19:18):
And yeah, he did realize, sorry, didn't mean to throw you off and step on you. Yeah, no, exactly.
And that was the thing that was the whole, that was the big thing from that day was just to see his,
to feel his emotion, you know, that he, that he had, I was just like,
you know, and I told my friend, I said, I'll never listen to you again when you just one more time.
(19:44):
No, how could it do? Yeah.
So, so experiences with, with, with your clients talk, talk about if you,
if you can, some of those transformational experiences that people have after
they've been with you and and the horses can you tell some stories.
Sure. I'll be as generic as possible, but the other don't want to identify anybody. Right.
(20:07):
So the, the other cool thing is that the horse can also act as a metaphor.
If someone is having a difficult time with a loved one or a friend or a spouse or whatever,
the horse can act as a metaphor for that person or a scenario or something.
(20:27):
And it allows the, the client to work through it and use what the feedback that
they're getting from the horse,
both the feedback that I'm having them experience and the direct feedback and
having that horse give them immediate feedback.
(20:47):
Like you said, if you're, if it's, if it's talk coaching or talk therapy or
whatever, people can tell you whatever they want to tell you.
Right. And yes, we do have our own intuition, But when you've got a thousand
pound animal standing next to you, giving you very, very direct feedback,
boom, it really cuts to the chase. Yeah.
(21:11):
So, you know, and then I've also seen people come in and they put their stuff
on the horse, whatever it is that they're dealing with.
I had a client that came into the round pen and the horses are just being horses.
As they're being themselves, they're taking care of themselves.
And the horse was over kind of at the very edge of the, of the round pen,
(21:34):
just kind of grazing on whatever grass it could, you know, nibble at or whatever.
And the client came in and immediately started saying, oh, the horse doesn't
like me. The horse is bored.
The horse is this, the horse is, you know, and I let it go on for a little bit.
And then I said, why do you think that?
(21:54):
Why do you think the horse doesn't like you why well he's over there
he's ignoring me he's doing you know what
i said he's being a horse so you know he's being a horse you know i mean they'll
just lay down in the middle of the arena they'll roll they'll grunt they'll
fart they'll poop they'll do whatever you know they don't care they're taking
care of themselves so it allows the person to sort of you know.
(22:19):
See and and and open up those doors to like oh and then the horse you know came
over and was walking with the person and and i said oh is the horse still bored
the horse still not like you,
no he likes me now like okay but
isn't that interesting interesting though how yeah how people read that or they'll
(22:41):
put their stuff on the horse like oh he's over there because he doesn't like
me he's over there because he's bored with me and it's like oh okay so what
you want to do is take those moments right build awareness around them so that
when they leave the arena,
they can go back out and have that takeaway that
(23:01):
maybe that person at work is not ignoring me
right maybe they have something else going on maybe they're
doing whatever it's not about me right it's just
because we always say it's not about the horse right it's
not it's not about the horse right and and
those perceptions that that that people have
that we have as human beings and we go out into the world
(23:22):
oh obviously they that person hasn't texted me back or right i haven't heard
back from them you know the story they must there's the story i call it i call
it going down the drain oh yeah the rat hole i call it the rat hole yeah yeah
and going down that drain and how it builds and builds and builds.
And until it's, I think as humans, sometimes we like to take the worst case scenario.
(23:46):
Absolutely. And I don't know if that's from our times being in,
you know, worried about being thrown out of the cave and eaten by a dinosaur
or what primal thing that is.
We all do it. I mean, I do it. I mean, you know, I've gotten way,
way, way better, but it was that paranoia of, oh my God, well,
if that person didn't call me right back or they didn't, you know,
(24:07):
maybe they don't like me. maybe they don't know.
Anyway, the horse is just like, I ain't got none of that going on.
I don't know what's coming up with that stuff, girl, but it's not happening here.
I just saw some grass I wanted to eat. Yeah, right?
To take a dump. So I went over to the other side of the arena.
But it is really interesting that once someone can actually settle down and
(24:28):
be in their body, and we'll go through some grounding exercises when they're in the arena, so that.
We live most of our lives up here. Horses don't. They're in their bodies constantly.
I mean, if they can, the tiniest little fly lands on their butt,
they can twitch that little tiny piece of skin and get rid of it.
I mean, that's how sensitive they are.
(24:50):
I mean, they know when we're a quarter of a mile away, they can sense our being
because like I said, they are prey animals.
Animals so they're trying to figure out what's going
on with you right they're looking at you they may be you
know their their ears work independently of each
other you know their eyes are on the sides of their head more you know we're
(25:11):
predators so we're like they have a really big field of vision so they know
what's going on unless you're like directly behind them or like right here in
front of them they can see everything that's going on so they You know,
they might have an ear back listening to you and another one forward because
they're trying to figure out what's going on.
So it's really interesting to watch their behavior.
(25:35):
How and how they interact with with a human and what's going on. Powerful.
It is so powerful. And the coaching opportunities are endless.
Yes, I could. I can see that. I can imagine that.
Now, if people want to experience this type of coaching, well,
(25:55):
first of all, we'll make sure that we give out your website,
which is willowbecoaching.com.
We'll spell that for you and put that in the show notes so people can click
on that. But where are you located?
Because obviously this is not something that you do via Zoom.
I mean, you know, it's all great and everything. But where would people need
(26:15):
to go in order to participate in this type of coaching?
So I live outside of Seattle. I am in a sort of a rural town called Enumclaw, so Western Washington.
But I also do, I will team up with other coaches and we do retreats,
private retreats at private ranches in various places like California or,
(26:37):
you know, we can go anywhere that there is a facility that meets our criteria.
In other words, has horses, has a couple of round pens and or an arena.
So people can, you know...
Create their own retreat, which is kind of cool. They can do a themed retreat.
Corporations can also, you know, if they have a group, an intact group or whatever,
(27:02):
a work group that they're trying to, and those are really interesting because, you know,
you're showing up at something that could potentially be a very emotionally
opening experience and you're there with your co-workers so the corporate or
more business related retreats can be pretty interesting so.
(27:24):
Well that's but that's also showing that's showing management who actually really
cares and wants the best from their team right yes and it is a team building
experience too because i'm sure the stories that you know come back well and
it is interesting because you can can see, oh,
okay, if you have like a group herding kind of thing, okay, you're the boss mayor at work.
(27:49):
Yeah. Yeah. I love it.
I love it. I'm intrigued by what you do. And I want others to learn more about
equine-assisted transformational life coaching.
My guest today has been Sue Willoughby. You can find out more by going to willoughbycoaching.com.
(28:10):
Don't worry about the spelling on that we will have that in the show notes you
can just click on the link and and check and check out sue's website and all
the great stuff and you get to see the horse some horses those are the those
are the therapists those are the those are the fellow coaches,
right and all different sizes they're beautiful oh my goodness it's a beautiful
(28:33):
beautiful website because i love seeing all the different all the different
horses that you have there we'll have We'll have to organize a retreat down
your way. Yes, absolutely.
That would be fun. And I do, because I do, I need to make my connection back
to horses again. Absolutely.
(28:53):
And you're the person to do it. Thank you, Sue, so much for being with me today.
And of course, I want to thank you wonderful listeners to the podcast on Apple,
Spotify, Amazon, all those great platforms.
And to the viewers who are watching on YouTube, Yes, the podcast is available on YouTube.
You can just look for Out of the Box with Christine and make sure you subscribe
(29:13):
and leave a comment if you want. If you enjoyed today's episode, that would be great.
If you want more information about my coaching program, you can go to ChristineBlosdale.com.
I'll have the link in the show notes as well.
And until next time, as I always say, remember to think outside that damn box.
And I think today's guest was just a perfect example of thinking outside the coaching box.
(29:36):
Thanks again, Sue. Thank you so much for listening, everybody.
Music.
So the horses are very intuitive they will present what
the person is putting out that they don't
even know that they're putting out so they act as a really an amazing
mirror to what is really happening
because they can sense incongruency they can
sense they sense our biorhythms i mean they
(00:23):
know how fast your heart is beating so if someone
is standing there saying oh I'm not afraid I'm good I'm good and the horse is
like oh hell no I'm just gonna stand over here until you're done and you can
be you know congruent with what's what's really going on inside and when the
person relaxes settles down and comes into their body the horse will come right over.
(00:45):
Music.
Welcome to Out of The Box With Christine. Are you willing to step into your greatness?
Are you ready to shine? Well get ready truth seeker you're in for an amazing
(01:09):
ride. And now, here's the host of the show,
Christine Blosdale.
Music.
Welcome back to Out of the Box with Christine. I am your host, Christine Blosdale,
your expert authority business coach, helping my clients get the word out on
(01:31):
their business through podcasting and TikToks and videos and their websites
and all that great stuff.
And today I am very excited to have a very special guest with me joining me today, Sue Willoughby.
And Sue is an equine-assisted transformational life coach.
And if you're like saying to yourself, what the heck is that?
(01:55):
Matt, this is really awesome.
And I can't wait to jump into this because I love these gorgeous animals and
you work with them on the daily with your clients.
So we're going to jump right into it. Sue, welcome to Out of the Box with Christine.
Thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited to be here.
And speaking of Out of the Box, right?
(02:16):
You know, when you tell people that you're a life coach, they're expecting probably,
they're thinking of you sitting on a Zoom call with a client and saying,
you know, you can do it and we can overcome these obstacles and where are you stuck in life right now?
And that's about it. But your coaching is quite a bit different, is it not?
(02:39):
It is. It is. Now I can do all of that stuff. And I do do do all of that stuff. You said do do.
Do do. Oh, careful language.
But the the thing that sets my coaching apart is that I have a partner.
And my partner is a four legged animal that weighs about 1200 pounds.
And I can also use minis and I can use ponies, I can use anything.
(03:05):
But I do work with horses, primarily, primarily because they're amazingly intuitive.
And how did you get started with this? I mean, did you experience this yourself
or was it just your relationship with horses for a long time?
And you said, oh my goodness, there's a light bulb moment going on.
(03:27):
A little bit of everything. Horses have always been in my life.
I remember when I was a little kid and your parents put you to bed before it
gets dark out and you're just sitting there like, it's daylight. What am I doing here?
And I managed to get up out of bed and I peered out the window and there were
two horses drinking from my kiddie pool in the backyard.
And I'm like, I came screaming out of my bedroom. I'm like, oh my God,
(03:48):
you put me to bed early so you could bring my horses over.
And they're just like, no, that is not what's happening here.
So, but they've all horses have always just, just been in my life.
And I didn't really realize how therapeutic they were
to me personally until later
in life and I'm like oh yeah putting those dots connecting those dots but when
(04:10):
I was I think 19 I quit my job I saw an ad in the paper that's when we did have
ads in the paper and it was for a summer counselor at a special.
Special ed camp basically and they needed
a horse person to work with in therapeutic
riding I didn't even know what that was but I'm like yeah I'm in so I wrote
(04:32):
him a letter hand wrote them a letter put it in the mailbox waited for the reply
and I had the best summer of my life I met people that are in my life now that
I've known for gosh probably over 40 years and it was just amazing.
We had a little herd of horses and we would do, you know, therapeutic riding
(04:53):
and it was amazing. It was incredible.
So that was kind of my, my entry into horse healing and horse therapy.
I love that. I remember when I was, I think it might've been junior high school.
I was lucky enough to do some English writing.
(05:14):
It was from a private school where we were able to access horses.
And I did a little bit of the English writing. And at that facility,
they would have children with different disabilities.
They would come and they would have, you know, get to be on a horse and experience
(05:35):
either just riding around the ring or just being with them.
And I think I remember vividly a young blind girl who was just lit up like a
Christmas tree when she got to be with the horse. And they were so gentle.
That was the thing, because I was like, that's a very large animal.
(05:57):
That could cause some harm at some point.
But they were so gentle with these children and it was something to witness. It really was.
So I could see how that would get you, you know, get you into that, into that world.
Now with what, with what you do.
(06:17):
It's not necessarily someone is riding a horse, correct? There's no riding.
Yeah, no riding. Talk about this. No riding experience.
So what happens in a session? The horse is at liberty, meaning that it doesn't
have a halter or a lead rope.
The horse is free to roam about the arena or the round pen, whatever facility that we're in.
(06:39):
And the client is in the arena with the horse.
And I asking them questions I have them set an intention when they first go
in so something that they want to work on something that they want to you know
take away from the the session.
And then I've given them safety demo and I've also shown them a couple of ways
(07:01):
to interact with the horse so that they're not totally you know out there not knowing what to do do?
Now what do I do? And then I just let them be and let them be with the horse.
I let them interact with the horse.
And while they're interacting, I may ask them questions and,
or I may, I'm usually just observing what the horse is doing.
(07:26):
And I'm also observing what the client is doing and what they're saying and what their behavior is.
And then I'm watching the horse And then I'm watching them and then I'm like, okay, hmm.
Okay. That gives me an opportunity to ask a coaching question,
an open-ended question or, or whatever.
I had a client that was actually wanted, felt better and wanted the horse on the lead.
(07:46):
And they were leading the horse around the arena and the horse was just,
you know, kind of nipping at their, at their shoulder and at their arm.
And I said, are you okay with that? And they're like, yeah, it's okay. It's okay.
And So I said, okay, well, let's just keep working. And it persisted to the
(08:07):
point where I said, okay, let's just stop for a second. And I said, what's going on here?
Oh, the horse is just, you know, trying to get my attention. I said, okay.
Can we talk about boundaries a little bit?
Is there a time in your life or when you're out, you know, in your real life
where things like this happen, where things or people or stuff comes into your
(08:29):
space that it may be unwanted? wanted.
And they thought for a minute, they're like, wow, yeah, yeah, there is.
So the horses are very intuitive. They will present what the person is putting
out that they don't even know that they're putting out.
Wow. That's powerful. So they act as a really, an amazing mirror to what is
(08:53):
really happening because they can sense incongruency.
They can sense, they sense our biorhythms. I mean, they know how fast your heart is beating.
So if someone is standing there saying, oh, I'm not afraid. I'm good.
I'm good. And the horse is like, oh, hell no.
I'm just going to stand over here until you're done. And you can be congruent
with what's really going on inside.
(09:15):
And when the person relaxes, settles down, and comes into their body,
the horse will come right over. It's amazing.
It's really incredible. What I find intriguing about that style of coaching,
too, is that you're taking someone out of, I don't want to say their comfort
zone, but out of this thing of, yeah, they're taking them out.
(09:36):
So they're focused on the experience of being with the horse and the sounds
and the, you know, the smells and everything.
Right. And so you're not diverting their attention per se, but you're,
you're having them in a, in a completely unique and different atmosphere.
(09:56):
Atmosphere than being in their cozy little living room or wherever,
or in an office type setting, right? Where we have expectations, right?
This is how it's going to go.
You're putting them in an unusual circumstance where they don't know what is
necessarily going to happen.
And that's really powerful, especially for a life coaching session, right?
(10:21):
Right. Well, that's the beauty of it, because A, they don't know what to expect, right?
The horses are big and the thing that a lot of people say, well,
they've either had a bad experience with a horse and I say bad in air quotes,
they've had an experience with a horse that was probably less than favorable
in their memory, right? And...
(10:43):
They say, well, you know, I'm intimidated by them. They're so big,
they're so powerful. And they are all of that. And then the truth is they're prey animals.
They're 1,200 pound prey animals. They are, the reason that they're so intuitive
is because they're constantly trying to figure out if they're gonna die or not, right? So am I safe?
(11:04):
What is this thing? You know, if it's a plastic bag, oh my God, what's gonna happen?
But they can, you know, ah, is that plastic bag gonna kill me?
They can in you know a heartbeat assess
you know they will sense it they will assess it they can
determine whether they're in danger or not right fight or
flight what are we going to do here and if it's not a threat then they can just
(11:25):
go back to grazing and go back to what they were doing so they're really good
at tuning into themselves and knowing what's around them so that they're they
know if they're safe or not we tend to hang on to a lot of stuff as you all know we We have stories.
We have all kinds of things that we tell ourselves. You know,
if a plastic bag blew across the thing, we'd be talking about it for a month.
(11:47):
Right. But the horse is like, okay, done with that. That's good.
So, you know, it's really interesting
because horses don't judge and they don't lie. They don't judge.
They're just being, just being. And that is what is really so cool about Equus
coaching is that it just, if people
(12:10):
can, or when they can settle into themselves and just be themselves.
It's beautiful. Well, and there's also that connection for, you know,
when you were talking about the horse also being very much aware that,
you know, it could be prey at any moment and sort of checking out the landscape, you know, vigilant.
(12:32):
That's what a lot of people with early childhood issues, early childhood traumas,
or if you were the child of an alcoholic,
you know that feeling of when the door opens, is this going to be good daddy
or bad daddy or angry daddy?
Mommy or bad mommy. Yeah, exactly.
(12:53):
And children who grow up under those circumstances can be hypervigilant and
always scanning the surrounding areas, right?
So I think that that also, even if it's a subconscious connection with the horse,
that's something that people can experience as well.
Maybe they're not even conscious of it, though, that that's happening.
(13:15):
Yeah, you know what?
I've always found horses so absolutely fascinating. And I know for myself,
I also, I need to get back to that connection because I had an odd experience with a horse.
And then later, once I had reviewed it in my mind and my psyche realized that
(13:39):
it absolutely was not the horse's fault.
It was one of these situations where we're around a ring and luckily it was
a soft dirt arena. We're around a ring.
My friend had access to these horses whose other friend said,
we need to ride the horses.
We need to take this exercise. It's like walking a dog, right?
(14:00):
You need to go. So her horse was a real...
Son of a gun and uh would be kick you know my horse would be behind and then
he would be kicking his back legs and mine was so beautiful and so wonderful
and so patient with the whole thing,
and we had we had been walking them for quite some time
or riding them for quite some time and she said do
(14:22):
you want to go let's you want to go one more time around and i
was like i felt the underneath the blanket and you know he was
getting warm a little bit and i said i don't know i think i think he's okay
i think he's good you know and she's like oh come on and i knew and i knew and
she's like come on let's do one more and i said okay so i did that little thing
giddy up you know come on and the horse in front of him did it again kicked
(14:47):
his leg back and my horse just said,
f you all i'm done took off to took off to the edge of the arena and was wanting
to flick me off his back like just get off of me and of course when you're going at full speed.
(15:09):
You want to get i was like oh you want me to get off i will i will gladly get
off but i can't get off until you stop because this is very fast so i just remember
like him going to the edge of the the arena and throwing his shoulder down trying
to flick me off and i said okay so i unsmartingly,
would take my leg out of the stirrup one leg
out of the stirrup right so i've got one leg in and one leg
(15:31):
out and i'm trying to push off i don't know
what i was trying to do watching stunt movies or something and and i ended up
i ended up being like my foot got stuck in the stirrup and i was being dragged
around the arena oh yes i was yeah and of course we didn't have helmets on we
did I didn't have the proper boots. I didn't have anything.
(15:53):
I think I had jeans on, which were shredded. But once I got my foot outside of that, he had...
And I was on the ground. I saw him just raise up and his foot came down,
his foot, his hoof, whatever, came down on my leg. Right.
And I have never experienced that sort of pain before. And...
(16:16):
In the chaos of all of that, what I noticed was when the horse realized he hurt me,
he immediately, it was like he put his head down and slowly walked away and just hung his head like,
(16:37):
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. too.
I'm so sorry. I am so, so sorry. And it was like, immediately I had that compact.
I was like, he was done and I knew he was done.
And, and we had to force our way with this horse who, who was,
who was completely done, but to see his remorse and how sad he was that he had hurt me,
(17:03):
was just mind blowing.
It just, it, it, it changed the whole situation. I didn't even,
I was like, what's that blood? That's nothing. Come on.
What's that bone sticking out there? We can put that right back. That's nothing.
But it was in that moment where I was like, wow, there's, they,
they, they're very much aware of, of, of your feelings and, and,
(17:24):
and that connection to human beings.
Have you had some experiences? Have you had some interesting experience?
Probably not like that one, but something similar. Similar. her.
Yeah. I, I've had a lot of crazy experiences with horses.
I think the first time I came off a horse, I was about five years old and we
run a little trail ride and my pony was like, I'm done totally.
(17:47):
And he started galloping back to the barn and I just came flying off and I was sitting there.
My mom of course was a basket case and she came up on her horse and she is not a rider by by the way.
And I'm sitting on the ground and she thought I was sobbing.
I was laughing hysterically, sitting in a big pile of horse poop,
just cracking up going, let's do that again.
(18:11):
So I've been pretty fortunate up until recently.
With not coming off the horse until last year, I decided to start playing polo
because I'm, why not at 64, right? I like to take those risks.
I was doing really well and I was having fun and we were doing like a little practice chucker.
It's a baby game, not at full speed, thank God. But the thing is,
(18:35):
if you pass the ball, you keep going.
Don't stop. Don't go back. Just keep going. But I got a little greedy and a little aggressive.
And I leaned back to whack the ball with my mallet. And as I did,
I pulled the horse up off the ground.
I came off and I shattered my wrist.
And yeah, it was a good one. I'm laying there. My wrist was all like, that's not right.
(18:57):
That's not right. So we went to the ER and that was last summer.
But I'm back. I'm back. So, I mean, you know, like you said,
they, they take care of themselves. Your horse was done.
He, he was just taking care of himself and he wasn't, you know,
no offense, but he wasn't thinking about you.
He was thinking about the situation he was in and you were just kind of collateral damage.
(19:18):
And yeah, he did realize, sorry, didn't mean to throw you off and step on you. Yeah, no, exactly.
And that was the thing that was the whole, that was the big thing from that day was just to see his,
to feel his emotion, you know, that he, that he had, I was just like,
you know, and I told my friend, I said, I'll never listen to you again when you just one more time.
(19:44):
No, how could it do? Yeah.
So, so experiences with, with, with your clients talk, talk about if you,
if you can, some of those transformational experiences that people have after
they've been with you and and the horses can you tell some stories.
Sure. I'll be as generic as possible, but the other don't want to identify anybody. Right.
(20:07):
So the, the other cool thing is that the horse can also act as a metaphor.
If someone is having a difficult time with a loved one or a friend or a spouse or whatever,
the horse can act as a metaphor for that person or a scenario or something.
(20:27):
And it allows the, the client to work through it and use what the feedback that
they're getting from the horse,
both the feedback that I'm having them experience and the direct feedback and
having that horse give them immediate feedback.
(20:47):
Like you said, if you're, if it's, if it's talk coaching or talk therapy or
whatever, people can tell you whatever they want to tell you.
Right. And yes, we do have our own intuition, But when you've got a thousand
pound animal standing next to you, giving you very, very direct feedback,
boom, it really cuts to the chase. Yeah.
(21:11):
So, you know, and then I've also seen people come in and they put their stuff
on the horse, whatever it is that they're dealing with.
I had a client that came into the round pen and the horses are just being horses.
As they're being themselves, they're taking care of themselves.
And the horse was over kind of at the very edge of the, of the round pen,
(21:34):
just kind of grazing on whatever grass it could, you know, nibble at or whatever.
And the client came in and immediately started saying, oh, the horse doesn't
like me. The horse is bored.
The horse is this, the horse is, you know, and I let it go on for a little bit.
And then I said, why do you think that?
(21:54):
Why do you think the horse doesn't like you why well he's over there
he's ignoring me he's doing you know what
i said he's being a horse so you know he's being a horse you know i mean they'll
just lay down in the middle of the arena they'll roll they'll grunt they'll
fart they'll poop they'll do whatever you know they don't care they're taking
care of themselves so it allows the person to sort of you know.
(22:19):
See and and and open up those doors to like oh and then the horse you know came
over and was walking with the person and and i said oh is the horse still bored
the horse still not like you,
no he likes me now like okay but
isn't that interesting interesting though how yeah how people read that or they'll
(22:41):
put their stuff on the horse like oh he's over there because he doesn't like
me he's over there because he's bored with me and it's like oh okay so what
you want to do is take those moments right build awareness around them so that
when they leave the arena,
they can go back out and have that takeaway that
(23:01):
maybe that person at work is not ignoring me
right maybe they have something else going on maybe they're
doing whatever it's not about me right it's just
because we always say it's not about the horse right it's
not it's not about the horse right and and
those perceptions that that that people have
that we have as human beings and we go out into the world
(23:22):
oh obviously they that person hasn't texted me back or right i haven't heard
back from them you know the story they must there's the story i call it i call
it going down the drain oh yeah the rat hole i call it the rat hole yeah yeah
and going down that drain and how it builds and builds and builds.
And until it's, I think as humans, sometimes we like to take the worst case scenario.
(23:46):
Absolutely. And I don't know if that's from our times being in,
you know, worried about being thrown out of the cave and eaten by a dinosaur
or what primal thing that is.
We all do it. I mean, I do it. I mean, you know, I've gotten way,
way, way better, but it was that paranoia of, oh my God, well,
if that person didn't call me right back or they didn't, you know,
(24:07):
maybe they don't like me. maybe they don't know.
Anyway, the horse is just like, I ain't got none of that going on.
I don't know what's coming up with that stuff, girl, but it's not happening here.
I just saw some grass I wanted to eat. Yeah, right?
To take a dump. So I went over to the other side of the arena.
But it is really interesting that once someone can actually settle down and
(24:28):
be in their body, and we'll go through some grounding exercises when they're in the arena, so that.
We live most of our lives up here. Horses don't. They're in their bodies constantly.
I mean, if they can, the tiniest little fly lands on their butt,
they can twitch that little tiny piece of skin and get rid of it.
I mean, that's how sensitive they are.
(24:50):
I mean, they know when we're a quarter of a mile away, they can sense our being
because like I said, they are prey animals.
Animals so they're trying to figure out what's going
on with you right they're looking at you they may be you
know their their ears work independently of each
other you know their eyes are on the sides of their head more you know we're
(25:11):
predators so we're like they have a really big field of vision so they know
what's going on unless you're like directly behind them or like right here in
front of them they can see everything that's going on so they You know,
they might have an ear back listening to you and another one forward because
they're trying to figure out what's going on.
So it's really interesting to watch their behavior.
(25:35):
How and how they interact with with a human and what's going on. Powerful.
It is so powerful. And the coaching opportunities are endless.
Yes, I could. I can see that. I can imagine that.
Now, if people want to experience this type of coaching, well,
(25:55):
first of all, we'll make sure that we give out your website,
which is willowbecoaching.com.
We'll spell that for you and put that in the show notes so people can click
on that. But where are you located?
Because obviously this is not something that you do via Zoom.
I mean, you know, it's all great and everything. But where would people need
(26:15):
to go in order to participate in this type of coaching?
So I live outside of Seattle. I am in a sort of a rural town called Enumclaw, so Western Washington.
But I also do, I will team up with other coaches and we do retreats,
private retreats at private ranches in various places like California or,
(26:37):
you know, we can go anywhere that there is a facility that meets our criteria.
In other words, has horses, has a couple of round pens and or an arena.
So people can, you know...
Create their own retreat, which is kind of cool. They can do a themed retreat.
Corporations can also, you know, if they have a group, an intact group or whatever,
(27:02):
a work group that they're trying to, and those are really interesting because, you know,
you're showing up at something that could potentially be a very emotionally
opening experience and you're there with your co-workers so the corporate or
more business related retreats can be pretty interesting so.
(27:24):
Well that's but that's also showing that's showing management who actually really
cares and wants the best from their team right yes and it is a team building
experience too because i'm sure the stories that you know come back well and
it is interesting because you can can see, oh,
okay, if you have like a group herding kind of thing, okay, you're the boss mayor at work.
(27:49):
Yeah. Yeah. I love it.
I love it. I'm intrigued by what you do. And I want others to learn more about
equine-assisted transformational life coaching.
My guest today has been Sue Willoughby. You can find out more by going to willoughbycoaching.com.
(28:10):
Don't worry about the spelling on that we will have that in the show notes you
can just click on the link and and check and check out sue's website and all
the great stuff and you get to see the horse some horses those are the those
are the therapists those are the those are the fellow coaches,
right and all different sizes they're beautiful oh my goodness it's a beautiful
(28:33):
beautiful website because i love seeing all the different all the different
horses that you have there we'll have We'll have to organize a retreat down
your way. Yes, absolutely.
That would be fun. And I do, because I do, I need to make my connection back
to horses again. Absolutely.
(28:53):
And you're the person to do it. Thank you, Sue, so much for being with me today.
And of course, I want to thank you wonderful listeners to the podcast on Apple,
Spotify, Amazon, all those great platforms.
And to the viewers who are watching on YouTube, Yes, the podcast is available on YouTube.
You can just look for Out of the Box with Christine and make sure you subscribe
(29:13):
and leave a comment if you want. If you enjoyed today's episode, that would be great.
If you want more information about my coaching program, you can go to ChristineBlosdale.com.
I'll have the link in the show notes as well.
And until next time, as I always say, remember to think outside that damn box.
And I think today's guest was just a perfect example of thinking outside the coaching box.
(29:36):
Thanks again, Sue. Thank you so much for listening, everybody.
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