February 10, 2025 • 40 mins
****Thank you for going through this elevation with us. After this episode everything will be "Who Am I with Krystal Jae"****
After years of living under the weight of tension and unease, I discovered a life-altering truth: we are not broken. Join me, Krystal Jae, as we embark on this journey of personal growth, learning to turn pain into purpose. Through my Empower Transformational Healing framework and the ODE method—Overcome, Discover, Elevate—you'll find the tools you need to break free from old patterns and embrace an unstoppable version of yourself.
Our bodies hold untold stories and unspoken truths, acting as a compass to our authentic selves. This episode reveals how listening to these bodily cues can transform anxiety into stability and guide us toward purposeful living.
Through a somatic exercise, we explore how to release physical tension and uncover unspoken truths, paving the way for profound personal transformation.
You can gain free access to the first module of my Breakthrough to Authenticity program, which offers invaluable insights into reshaping early experiences and reconnecting with your true identity.
Imagine a life where speaking your truth improves mental and physical well-being—it's possible. By understanding the body's language, we set boundaries, achieve clarity, and foster a more fulfilling life.
Whether you're looking to leave toxic situations or pursue postponed dreams, this episode invites you to embrace authenticity. I invite you to discover the special gift of accessing the first module of the Breakthrough to Authenticity program, a step towards a life filled with clarity, love, and purpose.
"Overcome Suffering in Silence with Krystal Jae" is on its own empowered transformational healing journey, and this episode will mark the elevation to "Who Am I with Krystal Jae." Continue to tune in to each episode as I focus on bringing you solutions to empower you to Elevate your life with success and fulfillment by Overcoming barriers and Discovering your authenticity to unlock potential with a plethora of tools, skills, and resources.
“You are not alone, and you are enough. When times get tough, pray, listen and follow through. God loves you and trust me when I say he is not your trauma.” ~Krystal Jae
“Believe in all that you are and know that you have this inner power that is greater than any obstacle.” ~Krystal Jae
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
You know that feeling when something just feels like
you're living your life doingall the right things but deep
down your body is telling youthere's more conversations.
(00:28):
Or the hairs coming up on theback of your neck or on your arm
, or that tension, headache thatjust won't go away.
Or perhaps it's that constantfeeling of being on edge,
waiting for the other shoe todrop.
It could be that, that feelingof uneasiness that just won't go
away.
You see, I know that feelingintimately.
(00:51):
I used to be the queen ofputting on a brave face while
suffering in silence.
And today I'm sharing somethingspecial with you Not just
another episode, but atransformation of our journey
together.
You know what fascinates memost about transformation?
(01:16):
It's not just about changing,it's about becoming who you were
always meant to be.
That's right, who you are meantto be.
Who are you?
Are you still asking yourself?
(01:37):
Who am I?
Then?
This is for you.
I remember standing in front ofmy mirror wearing what felt
like a thousand different masksthe quiet girl, the people
pleaser, the student with somuch drive, the person who
wasn't social.
(01:58):
And my body back then wasliterally screaming with tension
, holding on to every unspokenword, every suppressed emotion,
and just like you might befeeling right now.
I knew that something had tochange, because I knew that
(02:20):
something was missing.
But here's what nobody tellsyou about transformation at
least no one told me.
But transformation is not aboutfixing what's broken because
you were never broken to beginwith.
It's about shedding the layersthat were never truly yours.
(02:45):
I I'm Crystal Jane, the who Am Iexpert, the empowerment goddess
and your certified somatictrauma-informed coach.
I'm an author of EmpoweredWomen, inspired Vision and the
Empowerment Coloring Book forWomen.
And, and today we're divingdeep into something that might
(03:08):
completely shift how you seeyour journey.
You see, transformation isn'tjust about changing who you are.
It's about returning to who youwere always meant to be.
Just like a butterfly doesn'tcarry the weight of its cocoon
(03:28):
after it emerges right, you toocan learn to transform your pain
into purpose, your fear intofaith and, yes, your trauma into
triumph, and going fromunwanted to unstoppable.
On this empowered,transformational healing journey
(03:50):
, this isn't just anotherepisode about healing.
This is your invitation tosomething so, so, so much bigger
.
Whether you're feeling sick ofbeing stuck in a cocoon of old
patterns or you're just startingto feel those wings of
(04:13):
possibility flutter, what I'mabout to share could be the key
to unlocking your next level oftransformation.
And if you're thinking, I'vetried everything, what can you
tell me different?
Because if it's out there, I'vetried it before.
(04:36):
Well, that's exactly why youneed to hear this.
And if you know someone elsewho is thinking that way, they
need to hear this too.
So you know someone else who isthinking that way, they need to
hear this too.
So share this with them now, sothey can tune in and gain the
(04:56):
knowledge, because sometimes themost powerful breakthrough
comes when we least expect them,but when we most need them.
So we're going to bring alongour family, our friends, our
(05:16):
co-workers, your neighbor andyou're going to share this
episode with them.
Because I'm going to share thatwith mine, because this isn't
about me alone and it's notabout you alone, but it's about
making a true difference in asmany lives as we can.
(05:41):
So let's start with a truth thatmight feel uncomfortable.
Your body holds every story younever told, every boundary you
never set and every truth.
You've been afraid to speak.
But here's the beautiful partit also holds the key to speak.
(06:06):
But here's the beautiful partit also holds the key to
liberation.
Today marks a new chapter in ourpodcast journey, one that truly
reflects why I do what I do,the why it's also going to mark
how I can serve you better.
You see, my story isn't justabout overcoming barriers.
(06:27):
It's about discovering who youtruly are, beneath all those
layers of shoulds andexpectations.
It's about finallyunderstanding why you feel what
you feel and, more importantly,how to transform those feelings
into your greatest power.
Now, through my proprietaryframework, the Empower
(06:51):
Transformational Hume and theODE method Overcome, discover,
elevate I've helped countlesswomen and a few men move from
feeling anxious to feelinganchored, living on autopilot
mode to living with purpose,from people pleasing to peace,
finding suffering in silence tospeaking and living in their
(07:16):
truth.
So what if I told you that allthose sensations in your body,
the racing thoughts, thesleepless nights, the
overwhelming emotions, aren'tsigns that something's wrong
with you.
They're actually your body'swisdom trying to guide you home
to yourself.
Yeah, and today I'm not justsharing insights, I'm giving you
(07:43):
your first step towardstransformation.
I'm excited to share with youmodule one of the Breakthrough
to Authenticity program.
Now module one is aboutbarriers and their effects on
our neurological system.
In this powerful two-weekmodule, you'll discover how
(08:06):
early experiences shape yourcurrent responses, understanding
your unique connection style,practical somatic tools for
releasing stored tension, dailypractices for building safety
and trust, ways to beginreconnecting with your authentic
(08:28):
self.
And if you have never connectedwith your authentic self, you
will.
Starting with this module, andwhen you register today at
wwwcrystaljcom forward slashsneak peek that is
wwwcrystaljcom forward slashsneak peek You'll receive an
(08:58):
in-depth video lessons.
There's several lessons inthere, y'all, and they're in
depth, okay.
A comprehensive workbook formodule one.
Now, with the whole program,you get the workbook and
reflection exercise and so much.
But this is, this is going tobe a gift, y'all, right, so
(09:20):
you're going to get that sectionfor module one.
We're still including that,okay, because there are some
powerful exercises in there foryou.
You're going to get guidedsomatic practices, daily
integration tools, so that wayyou can really begin your step
(09:41):
towards empoweredtransformational healing.
So take this time to save thefree module one access and share
it with your group chat and onyour socials.
And again, that's atwwwkrystaljaecom forward slash
(10:02):
sneak peek.
Then, of course, it's time foryou to download this episode for
later, because you already knowthere's going to be some juicy
tips up in here.
Okay, hey, hey, welcome.
To Overcome Suffering in Silence.
It's time for you to stoppeople-pleasing and create your
(10:23):
better life.
I am Crystal J, the empowermentgoddess and your somatic,
trauma-informed life coach.
This season has already startedin a way I couldn't even
imagine.
Now, are you ready for somerealness, raw healing and a
glimpse into what it feels liketo walk in peace, clarity and
purpose, while truly knowing whoyou are?
(10:45):
If your answer is yes, thenyou've come to the right place.
For the past two decades, I'vebeen blessed to share my journey
with countless women and a fewmen, empowering them to overcome
the lingering shadows ofphysical, emotional,
psychological and sexual abuse.
Together, we confront thelimitations that hold us back,
(11:06):
like self-doubt, guilt, fear,shame and that pervasive sense
of unworthiness.
Dig deep to uncover the root ofthese feelings.
Break free from the inner painof suffering and silence.
Find faith, grow in that faithand embrace the life that is
meant for you.
Enjoy the real stories andpractical advice, life-enhancing
(11:32):
skills and spiritual wisdom toguide you from pain to purpose,
self-doubt to confidence andconfusion to clarity.
So let's leave the struggle busbehind and embark on this
journey to discover the freedom,beauty and strength that lies
within you.
Remember you are not alone andyou are enough.
When times get tough, pray,listen and follow through,
(11:57):
because God loves you, and trustme when I say he is not your
trauma.
Welcome to Overcome Sufferingin Silence.
With Crystal J, today I want totake you on a journey through
three powerful truths thatchanged everything for me and my
(12:17):
clients.
Part one the mask we wear.
I said before how I wore athousand masks right, showing up
as what others expected me tobe.
Are you showing up in differentparts of your life as what you
think others expect you to be,instead of who you truly are?
(12:41):
There were times to where I wasshowing up and I would be this
bright-eyed and bushy-tailedwoman or little girl, whichever
way, and inside I was just likeman.
I'm not supposed to be here,this isn't for me, but I wanted
(13:03):
to follow the lead of everyoneelse and be where the friends
are or the family is or whoever.
There were times that I wouldput on a smile when inside I'm
just crying, and so we don'twant you to continue to living
with your mask on.
(13:25):
There's no point in youcontinuing to live in that place
of you.
Know that feeling when you'resmiling and nodding but your
stomach is in knots and allqueasy.
That's not just anxiety, again.
That's your body's wisdomspeaking to you.
(13:47):
I remember being the ultimatepeople pleaser, always saying
yes, always being fine, alwayswearing that mask of perfection.
But here's what I didn'trealize Every time we wear those
masks, our body and mind pays aprice.
So think about it for a momentthat tension, headache after
(14:12):
forcing yourself to attend anevent that you dread, or the
digestive issues when you'repretending that everything is
okay.
The shoulder pain from carryingthe weight of others'
expectations Girl, I know thatshoulder's tired or are you
(14:36):
someone who carries it in yourback?
Think about it.
Your body knows when you're notbeing authentic.
It's like wearing shoes thatdon't fit and you, eventually
you start limping because yourfeet hurt.
(14:58):
Part two breaking up with silent.
That's why, at first, thispodcast was called
transformational healing.
But that's why I got changed toovercome suffering and silence,
because of because I know on myjourney, that's the main thing,
one of the main things that Iovercame, and I know that
(15:21):
countless have overcame thesuffering and silence because
that lingers.
We may show up and be like, oh,we're being bold and we're very
blunt and we're very outgoing,or you may be showing up as
being shy or antisocial.
But either way, whether you'reon the very social end and being
(15:54):
blunt or you're antisocial andbeing quiet, or a mixture.
You're still suffering insilence Because on the inside,
you feel agony, you feel pain,you feel sadness, you feel shame
, you feel guilt, you feelconfusion, you feel loneliness,
you feel guilt, you feelconfusion, you feel loneliness,
you feel fear, you feelabandonment.
But you don't have to continueto continue living in that
(16:15):
suffering and silence moment.
Yes, it may seem like, oh,that's just how life is, but
y'all, it gets better.
And I know, because I'm tellingyou, because I went through it
personally and I've walked otherpeople through it.
That's how I know what I sharewith you are proven methods that
(16:40):
work.
I don't just throw something outof the air and be like oh, can
I say this?
No, I've tried it, or myclients tried it, or we tried it
together.
They're proven to be able towork.
You just got to find the rightthing for you work.
You just gotta find the rightthing for you.
(17:00):
So let me tell you about one ofmy clients.
Um, let's call her maya.
She came to me believing thatlife was just life and there was
no better way to live life thanto just go with the motion.
She was content, she was okayin her relationships and she
just said that she was justwaiting for her husband to find
her.
(17:20):
So I asked her what does shelike to do?
And she was like, oh, I'm ahomebody I don't really like
going out with friends and stuff.
sometimes they drag me out andsometimes I just go, so that way
I don't have to hear theirmouth for me not going.
I just I was like, oh okay,well, how's work?
Uh, work is okay, you know, I,I like it.
It's bringing in the money,that's all that matters.
(17:42):
It pays the bills for me and mykids and I was like oh, that's
all that matters.
You know, you just said that youlike it.
It's not like it's a passion,or you're really in love with it
or something that you reallylove to do, or you know what,
(18:05):
how do you feel about that job?
She was like, honestly, Ireally want a career in.
I forgot what it was, and so Itold her I was like well, why
don't you have a career or not?
And I remember her saying thatshe would have to go to school
and she didn't have the time.
I said, okay, we'll put that onthe back burner and we'll work
(18:26):
our way to that.
And she looked at me and I'mlike yeah, I know.
And so then I asked her okay,so what do you like to do?
I like to y'all.
I like to get to know you,because if I'm going to truly
help you on your journey, I gotto know what you want in your
life.
Right, what are we workingtowards?
And so she was like she's alsobeen wanting to leave her home
state, but everyone around herhad been telling her that she
(18:49):
wouldn't make it if she left andwent where she knew it, where
she didn't like.
So she said that the main thingbothering her was that she was
too scared to speak her mind andthat she had seen some of my
content about being able tofinally speak my truth and
(19:10):
that's what brought her to me.
Okay, she said that she noticed, look, when she would try to
join conversations or peoplebeing shocked, that she had a
sense of humor whenever she didjump in.
But she also knew that if shespoke her mind, that some people
(19:32):
would not like what she had tosay, say, because, remember, she
was still doing things toplease others and not
necessarily speaking her truthor speaking her mind, telling
them that, no, she'd rather goand do this, or that, no, she
doesn't want to go, or throwingher ideas out there.
Right, she said that she wasused to living life this way.
(19:55):
You know her and her kids.
They had a routine and it justis what it is.
Life was just laughing and shewas just along for the ride.
She began to do the work toovercome the barriers that were
in her way.
She started implementing someof the skills that she learned,
(20:17):
but her favorite was finding hervoice.
She learned to communicatehealthy with her children, her
family, her friends, herco-workers and with strangers.
She started setting boundariesand communicating them and
explaining to people why sheneeded said boundaries.
(20:39):
Now, there were a couple ofmessages during this time.
Y'all, there was some messages,and I'm always.
Anytime that we're workingthrough this and I'm helping
people setting boundaries, I'mexpecting messages because I
know how difficult it can be forwhen we first start setting
those boundaries, because, y'all, it's not I'm not going to lie
(21:02):
it's not always easy, but themost important part is for us to
communicate our boundaries in ahealthy way, explain why we
have those boundaries and, ifthey're not respected, what we
are willing to do to protectourselves to where we, to where
(21:24):
our boundaries are alsoprotected and respected really,
okay.
And so you know, we talkedseveral times about different
people crossing her boundariesand how she can come back to
them and do like a reminder ofher boundaries.
Then she would reach out and wewill talk about it or we'll
message about it.
(21:44):
Okay, because it's about givingyou supports where you're truly
not alone in this journey.
Okay.
Now, once she was able to seethat people was really starting
to come around and respect herboundaries, she was so proud of
herself for finally standing upfor herself, but also for
(22:07):
finally deciding what herboundaries were and then
communicating them with othersand sticking to right.
That's the hard part issticking to them, because people
don't always respect them andsometimes it's easier for us to
just be like you know what,whatever, forget it, do what you
want to do, you know, and justthrow our boundary out, but no,
(22:27):
we're keeping our boundaries.
Okay.
Now here's what happens when westay silent.
Right, let me know if any ofthese relate to you.
You know, you get that frog inyour throat.
Right, your throat gets alltight, or it feels like you have
something in your throat.
Your shoulders creep up.
(22:49):
Our stomach be all, and not thearms on your well, either here
on your arms or the back of yourneck stands up.
If you have hair in one ofthose places, right, some people
their jaw clenches.
Your heart may raise, yourbreathing may get shallow, or
(23:14):
you may notice that you'rebreathing a lot faster.
Right, it's different.
It's a little different foreverybody, but when we're
experiencing this, your body issaying please let me speak my
truth, please let me be.
So.
(23:38):
After I learned to speak hertruth, you know what happened.
She started setting boundaries.
People started respecting thoseboundaries.
She stuck with those boundariesand guess what?
Her mind was clear, she hadless headaches, that that frog
(24:01):
in the throat gone, her bodystarted to relax and she started
leaving her house and doingmore than what she was doing
before.
Her friends appreciated thatshe was actually coming out and
socializing.
They were liking the version ofher that she was actually
coming out and socializing.
They were liking the version ofher that she was stepping into.
She liked that she was actuallyout socializing instead of
(24:26):
being consistently in the house.
So that's why it's importantfor you to learn to speak your
truth.
Part three we're going to talkabout the language of liberation
.
Now, right now, wherever youare, I want you to try something
.
Okay, okay, ready.
So I want you to wherever youare, except for if you're
(24:50):
driving.
Don't do this.
If you're driving, or if you'reriding the bike, or if you're
out for a run or you're in thestore, don't do this.
Look your somewhere to whereyou can really relax, okay, or
go to the store and I'll sit inthe car for a little bit before
I will come in.
That's you, that's perfect time, okay, so you're right, this is
(25:11):
what I want you to do.
I want you to take a deepbreath.
Take another deep breath Onemore.
I can now do it with my eyesclosed.
(25:38):
If you can't, you can go aheadand close your eyes as well.
Usually, when I close my eyes,I can focus more.
So let's do it again.
Take a deep breath One moretime.
Take a deep breath Now.
(25:59):
Where do you feel tension?
Deep breath.
What are you not saying?
Deep breath in and out.
So you grab in and out.
(26:21):
What would your body feel likeif you could be completely
honest?
Breathe in, breathe out.
You see, your body speaks insensations and once you learn
(26:42):
this language, everythingchanges.
That's what I really like aboutsomatics it's because we're
really focusing on our body andwhat's being held in our body,
because our body speaks to usand we go deeper into that in
(27:03):
the program.
But your body speaks to you.
A lot of times we'll getsignals from our body before we
even process it in our mind.
So here's some signs your bodyis speaking.
It's true, you have a sense ofexpansion in your chest.
Your shoulders start droppingaway from your ears, okay.
(27:25):
Your breathing starts flowingeasily and energy it moves
freely.
Now it's a great thing.
But just taking a simple breathin, deep breath in and blowing
it out if you don't even gottahold it and closing your eyes
(27:46):
and just focusing on your breathand asking yourselves those
questions where do I feeltension?
What am I not seeing?
What will my body feel like ifI was completely honest?
Ask yourself the questions thatyou've been wanting to know.
(28:09):
Just close your eyes andbreathe in and breathe out and
breathe out.
Now, when we start listening tothese messages, remarkable
things can happen.
I've seen clients finally leavetoxic situations.
(28:33):
I've seen clients startbusinesses or start nonprofits
that they've been dreaming about.
I've seen clients go for thatpromotion that they've been
dreaming about.
I've seen clients go for thatpromotion that they've been
wanting.
I've seen clients movelocations.
I've seen clients just startliving in their truth and
embracing who they are andovercoming the barriers that are
(28:55):
getting in their way andhonestly not letting trauma rule
their life.
They find that they are in lesspain, that they found their
voice, that they can reconnectwith their joy, that they can
have happiness and peace andclarity and purpose.
So here's another practice thatI would like for you to try.
(29:21):
Okay, it's called truth in thebody, okay, so I want you to
place one hand over your heartand take three deep breaths.
(29:55):
Notice what arises when you'redoing this, when you're taking a
breath.
What are you feeling?
Are you getting any images, anywords or any phrases?
What is your body doing?
three, four three more times.
(30:24):
So I want you to go and I wantyou to write down what you just
(30:51):
went through.
How did you feel, whatsensations came up, what images,
what words, what phrases, howdid you feel?
Write it down, it's for you.
So, doing this, I want you toremember that your body
(31:11):
reactions aren't wrong.
They're information.
That anxiety is telling youthat something is out of
alignment, that exhaustion ismost likely telling you that you
need to set some boundaries.
Yeah so, if you haven't yet,save this episode so you can try
(31:44):
these exercises at theappropriate times for you, write
down these steps.
Yes, I want you to also noticethat during these exercises I
didn't say breathe in for five,hold for four, breathe out for
eight or any of that.
I did that because these is foryou to just really be one with
(32:04):
your body and experience andlisten and feel it.
And so my deep breath may bedifferent than your deep breath,
because a lot of times when Ifirst start, I'm taking those
real deep breaths, but then Imay get to an area of my body
(32:25):
and it's telling me I'm taking ashorter breath, still deep, but
shorter.
Or I take a long deep breathand blow it out slow, but it
changes when you're going withthe flow, with your body.
(32:48):
Embrace that.
Okay, now you know.
When I started overcomesuffering, silence, I knew it
was the beginning of a rebrandand that's why in the last few
months it went from Empowered,transformational Feeling to
Overcome Suffering and Silence,and now we're finding our home,
and that home is who Am I withCrystal Jane?
So if you've been looking me upwith Overcome Suffering and
(33:09):
Silence, it's time to put who AmI with Crystal Jane.
Always just put Crystal Jane.
So if you've been looking me upwith Overcome, suffering and
Silence, it's time to put who AmI with Crystal Jane.
Always just put Crystal Jane.
You already know your girl'sgonna come up.
Okay, this podcast is on thistransformation journey, just
like a little.
I'm just really excited toannounce that it's going to be
evolving into the who am I withCrystal J, and the reason for
(33:33):
that is because that's my why.
My why is to help you find whoyou are.
I've said it many times that'sthe one of the best things I've
ever done for myself was to findwho I am, embrace it and start
(33:53):
living in it.
Best thing ever.
I've witnessed my childrenembrace who they are and live in
it, and it's magical.
I wouldn't give it up foranything.
I want that for you, I wantthat for others and that's why
(34:17):
we are going to who Am I WithCrystal Jane.
It's about the why.
It's more than a name change.
It's a deeper commitment toguiding you through your own
empowered, transformationalfeeling journey.
(34:37):
It's a deeper commitment tohelping you to find who you are.
So if you're asking who am I,you're in the right.
Or if you're saying I don'tknow who I am.
You're in the right place.
You know people who are sayingthat Send them over so they can
(34:59):
be in the right place.
I'm going to really make surethat every episode, every story,
Every tool that I share Isdesigned to help you move
forward in answering thatquestion of who am I?
(35:19):
Who am I really?
I'm here to guide you throughthe ODE method, to help you
(35:43):
overcome your barriers, discoveryour authentic self and elevate
into your fullest potential.
And speaking of transformation,remember that special gift that
I promised last week and that Imentioned earlier in the episode
.
Well, for the first time ever,I'm opening the doors to give
you a sneak peek into my provensignature Breakthrough to
(36:08):
Authenticity program.
You'll get complete access tomodule one barriers and their
effects on the neurologicalsystem.
You're like girl.
What is that about?
Let me tell you.
So.
This free module is for you ifyou're tired of feeling
disconnected from yourself.
(36:29):
You sense there's more to life,but something is holding you
back from finding out what thatmore is.
You're great at taking care ofothers, but struggle to extend
that same care to yourself.
You want to understand whycertain situations trigger
triggers your body Right andyou're ready to move from just
(36:54):
going with the flow of life belifing to really living your
life with your purpose and yourpassion.
Now to claim free access, allyou got to do is go to
wwwcrystaljcom, forward slash,sneak peek.
(37:16):
That's wwwcrystaljcom right now.
Go claim it now and complete it.
Okay, because, honestly, y'all,I don't know how long I will
(37:40):
have it available for free.
This is the first time I'm evergiving a module and this first
module is a powerful module andlet's give you a little glimpse
come in, it's two weeks, take it, the full module is going to be
available to you now.
(38:01):
I am going to give y'all adisclaimer now.
When you're in the full program, you don't only get the
in-depth videos, you don't onlyget the, the workbook activities
, but you also get me one-on-oneevery week and with some people
they get me in between sessionsvia messaging.
(38:25):
So, since I'm giving this toyou for free, you won't have
direct access to me.
You won't have the weeklysession, but there is an option
to upgrade to have me in therewith you, but we'll talk about
that at another time.
(38:47):
Right now, the most importantpart is for you to go take
advantage of this first module.
It's in-depth, it's severallessons.
You already know If I'm givingyou tools on my podcast.
You already know there's toolsin the modules, so go check it
(39:07):
out Again.
It's wwwstaljaecom.
Forward slash sneak peekcrystal.
Jcom forward slash sneak peek.
Share this with a friend, sharethis with family, put it on
your social media pages, post itin your group chat.
Look, we're here to helpeveryone live their life
(39:29):
authentically as themselves,helping them overcome the
barriers, discover who they are,so they can unlock their
potential, so they can livetheir life that is full of love,
full of clarity, full ofpurpose, full of their values,
(39:51):
because all of that doesn'taffect just you as an individual
.
It causes a ripple effect amongthe people around you, in your
home, in your church, at yourwork.
I've seen it, I've lived.
(40:14):
So check out module one.
It's yours For free.
So remember You're not alone.
And, yes, there is a better wayTo live life.
So embrace it.
Hold on, remember you're notalone and, yes, there is a
(40:40):
better way to live life.
So embrace living yourauthentic life, because it truly
elevates everything that'simportant to you.
You know that feeling when something just feels like
you're living your life doingall the right things but deep
down your body is telling youthere's more conversations.
(00:28):
Or the hairs coming up on theback of your neck or on your arm
, or that tension, headache thatjust won't go away.
Or perhaps it's that constantfeeling of being on edge,
waiting for the other shoe todrop.
It could be that, that feelingof uneasiness that just won't go
away.
You see, I know that feelingintimately.
(00:51):
I used to be the queen ofputting on a brave face while
suffering in silence.
And today I'm sharing somethingspecial with you Not just
another episode, but atransformation of our journey
together.
You know what fascinates memost about transformation?
(01:16):
It's not just about changing,it's about becoming who you were
always meant to be.
That's right, who you are meantto be.
Who are you?
Are you still asking yourself?
(01:37):
Who am I?
Then?
This is for you.
I remember standing in front ofmy mirror wearing what felt
like a thousand different masksthe quiet girl, the people
pleaser, the student with somuch drive, the person who
wasn't social.
(01:58):
And my body back then wasliterally screaming with tension
, holding on to every unspokenword, every suppressed emotion,
and just like you might befeeling right now.
I knew that something had tochange, because I knew that
(02:20):
something was missing.
But here's what nobody tellsyou about transformation at
least no one told me.
But transformation is not aboutfixing what's broken because
you were never broken to beginwith.
It's about shedding the layersthat were never truly yours.
(02:45):
I I'm Crystal Jane, the who Am Iexpert, the empowerment goddess
and your certified somatictrauma-informed coach.
I'm an author of EmpoweredWomen, inspired Vision and the
Empowerment Coloring Book forWomen.
And, and today we're divingdeep into something that might
(03:08):
completely shift how you seeyour journey.
You see, transformation isn'tjust about changing who you are.
It's about returning to who youwere always meant to be.
Just like a butterfly doesn'tcarry the weight of its cocoon
(03:28):
after it emerges right, you toocan learn to transform your pain
into purpose, your fear intofaith and, yes, your trauma into
triumph, and going fromunwanted to unstoppable.
On this empowered,transformational healing journey
(03:50):
, this isn't just anotherepisode about healing.
This is your invitation tosomething so, so, so much bigger
.
Whether you're feeling sick ofbeing stuck in a cocoon of old
patterns or you're just startingto feel those wings of
(04:13):
possibility flutter, what I'mabout to share could be the key
to unlocking your next level oftransformation.
And if you're thinking, I'vetried everything, what can you
tell me different?
Because if it's out there, I'vetried it before.
(04:36):
Well, that's exactly why youneed to hear this.
And if you know someone elsewho is thinking that way, they
need to hear this too.
So you know someone else who isthinking that way, they need to
hear this too.
So share this with them now, sothey can tune in and gain the
(04:56):
knowledge, because sometimes themost powerful breakthrough
comes when we least expect them,but when we most need them.
So we're going to bring alongour family, our friends, our
(05:16):
co-workers, your neighbor andyou're going to share this
episode with them.
Because I'm going to share thatwith mine, because this isn't
about me alone and it's notabout you alone, but it's about
making a true difference in asmany lives as we can.
(05:41):
So let's start with a truth thatmight feel uncomfortable.
Your body holds every story younever told, every boundary you
never set and every truth.
You've been afraid to speak.
But here's the beautiful partit also holds the key to speak.
(06:06):
But here's the beautiful partit also holds the key to
liberation.
Today marks a new chapter in ourpodcast journey, one that truly
reflects why I do what I do,the why it's also going to mark
how I can serve you better.
You see, my story isn't justabout overcoming barriers.
(06:27):
It's about discovering who youtruly are, beneath all those
layers of shoulds andexpectations.
It's about finallyunderstanding why you feel what
you feel and, more importantly,how to transform those feelings
into your greatest power.
Now, through my proprietaryframework, the Empower
(06:51):
Transformational Hume and theODE method Overcome, discover,
elevate I've helped countlesswomen and a few men move from
feeling anxious to feelinganchored, living on autopilot
mode to living with purpose,from people pleasing to peace,
finding suffering in silence tospeaking and living in their
(07:16):
truth.
So what if I told you that allthose sensations in your body,
the racing thoughts, thesleepless nights, the
overwhelming emotions, aren'tsigns that something's wrong
with you.
They're actually your body'swisdom trying to guide you home
to yourself.
Yeah, and today I'm not justsharing insights, I'm giving you
(07:43):
your first step towardstransformation.
I'm excited to share with youmodule one of the Breakthrough
to Authenticity program.
Now module one is aboutbarriers and their effects on
our neurological system.
In this powerful two-weekmodule, you'll discover how
(08:06):
early experiences shape yourcurrent responses, understanding
your unique connection style,practical somatic tools for
releasing stored tension, dailypractices for building safety
and trust, ways to beginreconnecting with your authentic
(08:28):
self.
And if you have never connectedwith your authentic self, you
will.
Starting with this module, andwhen you register today at
wwwcrystaljcom forward slashsneak peek that is
wwwcrystaljcom forward slashsneak peek You'll receive an
(08:58):
in-depth video lessons.
There's several lessons inthere, y'all, and they're in
depth, okay.
A comprehensive workbook formodule one.
Now, with the whole program,you get the workbook and
reflection exercise and so much.
But this is, this is going tobe a gift, y'all, right, so
(09:20):
you're going to get that sectionfor module one.
We're still including that,okay, because there are some
powerful exercises in there foryou.
You're going to get guidedsomatic practices, daily
integration tools, so that wayyou can really begin your step
(09:41):
towards empoweredtransformational healing.
So take this time to save thefree module one access and share
it with your group chat and onyour socials.
And again, that's atwwwkrystaljaecom forward slash
(10:02):
sneak peek.
Then, of course, it's time foryou to download this episode for
later, because you already knowthere's going to be some juicy
tips up in here.
Okay, hey, hey, welcome.
To Overcome Suffering in Silence.
It's time for you to stoppeople-pleasing and create your
(10:23):
better life.
I am Crystal J, the empowermentgoddess and your somatic,
trauma-informed life coach.
This season has already startedin a way I couldn't even
imagine.
Now, are you ready for somerealness, raw healing and a
glimpse into what it feels liketo walk in peace, clarity and
purpose, while truly knowing whoyou are?
(10:45):
If your answer is yes, thenyou've come to the right place.
For the past two decades, I'vebeen blessed to share my journey
with countless women and a fewmen, empowering them to overcome
the lingering shadows ofphysical, emotional,
psychological and sexual abuse.
Together, we confront thelimitations that hold us back,
(11:06):
like self-doubt, guilt, fear,shame and that pervasive sense
of unworthiness.
Dig deep to uncover the root ofthese feelings.
Break free from the inner painof suffering and silence.
Find faith, grow in that faithand embrace the life that is
meant for you.
Enjoy the real stories andpractical advice, life-enhancing
(11:32):
skills and spiritual wisdom toguide you from pain to purpose,
self-doubt to confidence andconfusion to clarity.
So let's leave the struggle busbehind and embark on this
journey to discover the freedom,beauty and strength that lies
within you.
Remember you are not alone andyou are enough.
When times get tough, pray,listen and follow through,
(11:57):
because God loves you, and trustme when I say he is not your
trauma.
Welcome to Overcome Sufferingin Silence.
With Crystal J, today I want totake you on a journey through
three powerful truths thatchanged everything for me and my
(12:17):
clients.
Part one the mask we wear.
I said before how I wore athousand masks right, showing up
as what others expected me tobe.
Are you showing up in differentparts of your life as what you
think others expect you to be,instead of who you truly are?
(12:41):
There were times to where I wasshowing up and I would be this
bright-eyed and bushy-tailedwoman or little girl, whichever
way, and inside I was just likeman.
I'm not supposed to be here,this isn't for me, but I wanted
(13:03):
to follow the lead of everyoneelse and be where the friends
are or the family is or whoever.
There were times that I wouldput on a smile when inside I'm
just crying, and so we don'twant you to continue to living
with your mask on.
(13:25):
There's no point in youcontinuing to live in that place
of you.
Know that feeling when you'resmiling and nodding but your
stomach is in knots and allqueasy.
That's not just anxiety, again.
That's your body's wisdomspeaking to you.
(13:47):
I remember being the ultimatepeople pleaser, always saying
yes, always being fine, alwayswearing that mask of perfection.
But here's what I didn'trealize Every time we wear those
masks, our body and mind pays aprice.
So think about it for a momentthat tension, headache after
(14:12):
forcing yourself to attend anevent that you dread, or the
digestive issues when you'repretending that everything is
okay.
The shoulder pain from carryingthe weight of others'
expectations Girl, I know thatshoulder's tired or are you
(14:36):
someone who carries it in yourback?
Think about it.
Your body knows when you're notbeing authentic.
It's like wearing shoes thatdon't fit and you, eventually
you start limping because yourfeet hurt.
(14:58):
Part two breaking up with silent.
That's why, at first, thispodcast was called
transformational healing.
But that's why I got changed toovercome suffering and silence,
because of because I know on myjourney, that's the main thing,
one of the main things that Iovercame, and I know that
(15:21):
countless have overcame thesuffering and silence because
that lingers.
We may show up and be like, oh,we're being bold and we're very
blunt and we're very outgoing,or you may be showing up as
being shy or antisocial.
But either way, whether you'reon the very social end and being
(15:54):
blunt or you're antisocial andbeing quiet, or a mixture.
You're still suffering insilence Because on the inside,
you feel agony, you feel pain,you feel sadness, you feel shame
, you feel guilt, you feelconfusion, you feel loneliness,
you feel guilt, you feelconfusion, you feel loneliness,
you feel fear, you feelabandonment.
But you don't have to continueto continue living in that
(16:15):
suffering and silence moment.
Yes, it may seem like, oh,that's just how life is, but
y'all, it gets better.
And I know, because I'm tellingyou, because I went through it
personally and I've walked otherpeople through it.
That's how I know what I sharewith you are proven methods that
(16:40):
work.
I don't just throw something outof the air and be like oh, can
I say this?
No, I've tried it, or myclients tried it, or we tried it
together.
They're proven to be able towork.
You just got to find the rightthing for you work.
You just gotta find the rightthing for you.
(17:00):
So let me tell you about one ofmy clients.
Um, let's call her maya.
She came to me believing thatlife was just life and there was
no better way to live life thanto just go with the motion.
She was content, she was okayin her relationships and she
just said that she was justwaiting for her husband to find
her.
(17:20):
So I asked her what does shelike to do?
And she was like, oh, I'm ahomebody I don't really like
going out with friends and stuff.
sometimes they drag me out andsometimes I just go, so that way
I don't have to hear theirmouth for me not going.
I just I was like, oh okay,well, how's work?
Uh, work is okay, you know, I,I like it.
It's bringing in the money,that's all that matters.
(17:42):
It pays the bills for me and mykids and I was like oh, that's
all that matters.
You know, you just said that youlike it.
It's not like it's a passion,or you're really in love with it
or something that you reallylove to do, or you know what,
(18:05):
how do you feel about that job?
She was like, honestly, Ireally want a career in.
I forgot what it was, and so Itold her I was like well, why
don't you have a career or not?
And I remember her saying thatshe would have to go to school
and she didn't have the time.
I said, okay, we'll put that onthe back burner and we'll work
(18:26):
our way to that.
And she looked at me and I'mlike yeah, I know.
And so then I asked her okay,so what do you like to do?
I like to y'all.
I like to get to know you,because if I'm going to truly
help you on your journey, I gotto know what you want in your
life.
Right, what are we workingtowards?
And so she was like she's alsobeen wanting to leave her home
state, but everyone around herhad been telling her that she
(18:49):
wouldn't make it if she left andwent where she knew it, where
she didn't like.
So she said that the main thingbothering her was that she was
too scared to speak her mind andthat she had seen some of my
content about being able tofinally speak my truth and
(19:10):
that's what brought her to me.
Okay, she said that she noticed, look, when she would try to
join conversations or peoplebeing shocked, that she had a
sense of humor whenever she didjump in.
But she also knew that if shespoke her mind, that some people
(19:32):
would not like what she had tosay, say, because, remember, she
was still doing things toplease others and not
necessarily speaking her truthor speaking her mind, telling
them that, no, she'd rather goand do this, or that, no, she
doesn't want to go, or throwingher ideas out there.
Right, she said that she wasused to living life this way.
(19:55):
You know her and her kids.
They had a routine and it justis what it is.
Life was just laughing and shewas just along for the ride.
She began to do the work toovercome the barriers that were
in her way.
She started implementing someof the skills that she learned,
(20:17):
but her favorite was finding hervoice.
She learned to communicatehealthy with her children, her
family, her friends, herco-workers and with strangers.
She started setting boundariesand communicating them and
explaining to people why sheneeded said boundaries.
(20:39):
Now, there were a couple ofmessages during this time.
Y'all, there was some messages,and I'm always.
Anytime that we're workingthrough this and I'm helping
people setting boundaries, I'mexpecting messages because I
know how difficult it can be forwhen we first start setting
those boundaries, because, y'all, it's not I'm not going to lie
(21:02):
it's not always easy, but themost important part is for us to
communicate our boundaries in ahealthy way, explain why we
have those boundaries and, ifthey're not respected, what we
are willing to do to protectourselves to where we, to where
(21:24):
our boundaries are alsoprotected and respected really,
okay.
And so you know, we talkedseveral times about different
people crossing her boundariesand how she can come back to
them and do like a reminder ofher boundaries.
Then she would reach out and wewill talk about it or we'll
message about it.
(21:44):
Okay, because it's about givingyou supports where you're truly
not alone in this journey.
Okay.
Now, once she was able to seethat people was really starting
to come around and respect herboundaries, she was so proud of
herself for finally standing upfor herself, but also for
(22:07):
finally deciding what herboundaries were and then
communicating them with othersand sticking to right.
That's the hard part issticking to them, because people
don't always respect them andsometimes it's easier for us to
just be like you know what,whatever, forget it, do what you
want to do, you know, and justthrow our boundary out, but no,
(22:27):
we're keeping our boundaries.
Okay.
Now here's what happens when westay silent.
Right, let me know if any ofthese relate to you.
You know, you get that frog inyour throat.
Right, your throat gets alltight, or it feels like you have
something in your throat.
Your shoulders creep up.
(22:49):
Our stomach be all, and not thearms on your well, either here
on your arms or the back of yourneck stands up.
If you have hair in one ofthose places, right, some people
their jaw clenches.
Your heart may raise, yourbreathing may get shallow, or
(23:14):
you may notice that you'rebreathing a lot faster.
Right, it's different.
It's a little different foreverybody, but when we're
experiencing this, your body issaying please let me speak my
truth, please let me be.
So.
(23:38):
After I learned to speak hertruth, you know what happened.
She started setting boundaries.
People started respecting thoseboundaries.
She stuck with those boundariesand guess what?
Her mind was clear, she hadless headaches, that that frog
(24:01):
in the throat gone, her bodystarted to relax and she started
leaving her house and doingmore than what she was doing
before.
Her friends appreciated thatshe was actually coming out and
socializing.
They were liking the version ofher that she was actually
coming out and socializing.
They were liking the version ofher that she was stepping into.
She liked that she was actuallyout socializing instead of
(24:26):
being consistently in the house.
So that's why it's importantfor you to learn to speak your
truth.
Part three we're going to talkabout the language of liberation
.
Now, right now, wherever youare, I want you to try something
.
Okay, okay, ready.
So I want you to wherever youare, except for if you're
(24:50):
driving.
Don't do this.
If you're driving, or if you'reriding the bike, or if you're
out for a run or you're in thestore, don't do this.
Look your somewhere to whereyou can really relax, okay, or
go to the store and I'll sit inthe car for a little bit before
I will come in.
That's you, that's perfect time, okay, so you're right, this is
(25:11):
what I want you to do.
I want you to take a deepbreath.
Take another deep breath Onemore.
I can now do it with my eyesclosed.
(25:38):
If you can't, you can go aheadand close your eyes as well.
Usually, when I close my eyes,I can focus more.
So let's do it again.
Take a deep breath One moretime.
Take a deep breath Now.
(25:59):
Where do you feel tension?
Deep breath.
What are you not saying?
Deep breath in and out.
So you grab in and out.
(26:21):
What would your body feel likeif you could be completely
honest?
Breathe in, breathe out.
You see, your body speaks insensations and once you learn
(26:42):
this language, everythingchanges.
That's what I really like aboutsomatics it's because we're
really focusing on our body andwhat's being held in our body,
because our body speaks to usand we go deeper into that in
(27:03):
the program.
But your body speaks to you.
A lot of times we'll getsignals from our body before we
even process it in our mind.
So here's some signs your bodyis speaking.
It's true, you have a sense ofexpansion in your chest.
Your shoulders start droppingaway from your ears, okay.
(27:25):
Your breathing starts flowingeasily and energy it moves
freely.
Now it's a great thing.
But just taking a simple breathin, deep breath in and blowing
it out if you don't even gottahold it and closing your eyes
(27:46):
and just focusing on your breathand asking yourselves those
questions where do I feeltension?
What am I not seeing?
What will my body feel like ifI was completely honest?
Ask yourself the questions thatyou've been wanting to know.
(28:09):
Just close your eyes andbreathe in and breathe out and
breathe out.
Now, when we start listening tothese messages, remarkable
things can happen.
I've seen clients finally leavetoxic situations.
(28:33):
I've seen clients startbusinesses or start nonprofits
that they've been dreaming about.
I've seen clients go for thatpromotion that they've been
dreaming about.
I've seen clients go for thatpromotion that they've been
wanting.
I've seen clients movelocations.
I've seen clients just startliving in their truth and
embracing who they are andovercoming the barriers that are
(28:55):
getting in their way andhonestly not letting trauma rule
their life.
They find that they are in lesspain, that they found their
voice, that they can reconnectwith their joy, that they can
have happiness and peace andclarity and purpose.
So here's another practice thatI would like for you to try.
(29:21):
Okay, it's called truth in thebody, okay, so I want you to
place one hand over your heartand take three deep breaths.
(29:55):
Notice what arises when you'redoing this, when you're taking a
breath.
What are you feeling?
Are you getting any images, anywords or any phrases?
What is your body doing?
three, four three more times.
(30:24):
So I want you to go and I wantyou to write down what you just
(30:51):
went through.
How did you feel, whatsensations came up, what images,
what words, what phrases, howdid you feel?
Write it down, it's for you.
So, doing this, I want you toremember that your body
(31:11):
reactions aren't wrong.
They're information.
That anxiety is telling youthat something is out of
alignment, that exhaustion ismost likely telling you that you
need to set some boundaries.
Yeah so, if you haven't yet,save this episode so you can try
(31:44):
these exercises at theappropriate times for you, write
down these steps.
Yes, I want you to also noticethat during these exercises I
didn't say breathe in for five,hold for four, breathe out for
eight or any of that.
I did that because these is foryou to just really be one with
(32:04):
your body and experience andlisten and feel it.
And so my deep breath may bedifferent than your deep breath,
because a lot of times when Ifirst start, I'm taking those
real deep breaths, but then Imay get to an area of my body
(32:25):
and it's telling me I'm taking ashorter breath, still deep, but
shorter.
Or I take a long deep breathand blow it out slow, but it
changes when you're going withthe flow, with your body.
(32:48):
Embrace that.
Okay, now you know.
When I started overcomesuffering, silence, I knew it
was the beginning of a rebrandand that's why in the last few
months it went from Empowered,transformational Feeling to
Overcome Suffering and Silence,and now we're finding our home,
and that home is who Am I withCrystal Jane?
So if you've been looking me upwith Overcome Suffering and
(33:09):
Silence, it's time to put who AmI with Crystal Jane.
Always just put Crystal Jane.
So if you've been looking me upwith Overcome, suffering and
Silence, it's time to put who AmI with Crystal Jane.
Always just put Crystal Jane.
You already know your girl'sgonna come up.
Okay, this podcast is on thistransformation journey, just
like a little.
I'm just really excited toannounce that it's going to be
evolving into the who am I withCrystal J, and the reason for
(33:33):
that is because that's my why.
My why is to help you find whoyou are.
I've said it many times that'sthe one of the best things I've
ever done for myself was to findwho I am, embrace it and start
(33:53):
living in it.
Best thing ever.
I've witnessed my childrenembrace who they are and live in
it, and it's magical.
I wouldn't give it up foranything.
I want that for you, I wantthat for others and that's why
(34:17):
we are going to who Am I WithCrystal Jane.
It's about the why.
It's more than a name change.
It's a deeper commitment toguiding you through your own
empowered, transformationalfeeling journey.
(34:37):
It's a deeper commitment tohelping you to find who you are.
So if you're asking who am I,you're in the right.
Or if you're saying I don'tknow who I am.
You're in the right place.
You know people who are sayingthat Send them over so they can
(34:59):
be in the right place.
I'm going to really make surethat every episode, every story,
Every tool that I share Isdesigned to help you move
forward in answering thatquestion of who am I?
(35:19):
Who am I really?
I'm here to guide you throughthe ODE method, to help you
(35:43):
overcome your barriers, discoveryour authentic self and elevate
into your fullest potential.
And speaking of transformation,remember that special gift that
I promised last week and that Imentioned earlier in the episode
.
Well, for the first time ever,I'm opening the doors to give
you a sneak peek into my provensignature Breakthrough to
(36:08):
Authenticity program.
You'll get complete access tomodule one barriers and their
effects on the neurologicalsystem.
You're like girl.
What is that about?
Let me tell you.
So.
This free module is for you ifyou're tired of feeling
disconnected from yourself.
(36:29):
You sense there's more to life,but something is holding you
back from finding out what thatmore is.
You're great at taking care ofothers, but struggle to extend
that same care to yourself.
You want to understand whycertain situations trigger
triggers your body Right andyou're ready to move from just
(36:54):
going with the flow of life belifing to really living your
life with your purpose and yourpassion.
Now to claim free access, allyou got to do is go to
wwwcrystaljcom, forward slash,sneak peek.
(37:16):
That's wwwcrystaljcom right now.
Go claim it now and complete it.
Okay, because, honestly, y'all,I don't know how long I will
(37:40):
have it available for free.
This is the first time I'm evergiving a module and this first
module is a powerful module andlet's give you a little glimpse
come in, it's two weeks, take it, the full module is going to be
available to you now.
(38:01):
I am going to give y'all adisclaimer now.
When you're in the full program, you don't only get the
in-depth videos, you don't onlyget the, the workbook activities
, but you also get me one-on-oneevery week and with some people
they get me in between sessionsvia messaging.
(38:25):
So, since I'm giving this toyou for free, you won't have
direct access to me.
You won't have the weeklysession, but there is an option
to upgrade to have me in therewith you, but we'll talk about
that at another time.
(38:47):
Right now, the most importantpart is for you to go take
advantage of this first module.
It's in-depth, it's severallessons.
You already know If I'm givingyou tools on my podcast.
You already know there's toolsin the modules, so go check it
(39:07):
out Again.
It's wwwstaljaecom.
Forward slash sneak peekcrystal.
Jcom forward slash sneak peek.
Share this with a friend, sharethis with family, put it on
your social media pages, post itin your group chat.
Look, we're here to helpeveryone live their life
(39:29):
authentically as themselves,helping them overcome the
barriers, discover who they are,so they can unlock their
potential, so they can livetheir life that is full of love,
full of clarity, full ofpurpose, full of their values,
(39:51):
because all of that doesn'taffect just you as an individual
.
It causes a ripple effect amongthe people around you, in your
home, in your church, at yourwork.
I've seen it, I've lived.
(40:14):
So check out module one.
It's yours For free.
So remember You're not alone.
And, yes, there is a better wayTo live life.
So embrace it.
Hold on, remember you're notalone and, yes, there is a
(40:40):
better way to live life.
So embrace living yourauthentic life, because it truly
elevates everything that'simportant to you.
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