November 25, 2025 • 45 mins
Rachel Pederson's journey from welfare recipient to working with industry titans like Russell Brunson isn't your typical success story. What makes her path remarkable isn't just how far she's come, but her willingness to shine a light on her failures—both past and present.
As a naturally introverted pastor's daughter raised in poverty, Rachel learned early that "survivors never quit." This mindset carried her through alcoholism, debt, and single motherhood at 21, leading to beauty school and a career as a hairstylist. But everything changed when a salon client asked about her marketing approach and unexpectedly offered her a consulting position. Within nine months of taking her business seriously, Rachel had replaced both her income and her husband's.
In our conversation, Rachel courageously opens up about a recent business failure—her "90 Day Business Magic" program that collapsed under the weight of medical issues, grief, and family crises. Rather than glossing over this setback, she unpacks the valuable lessons learned: the importance of stepping back when things aren't working, creating distance for objective analysis, and sometimes having the courage to abandon ship completely.
The most transformative element of Rachel's journey has been her practice of gratitude. Following a public breakdown that damaged her reputation, she rebuilt with gratitude as her foundation—starting each day appreciating her cozy bed and celebrating small wins with enthusiastic "yas!" exclamations. This seemingly simple practice has revolutionized both her business approach and life experience.
What's particularly refreshing about Rachel's philosophy is her commitment to accessibility. Drawing from her experience finding designer shoes for 99 cents during her struggling days, she understands that free and affordable offerings create lasting loyalty. This belief guides her business model, where she prioritizes giving away high-quality content rather than hoarding knowledge behind paywalls.
Whether you're facing burnout, questioning your business direction, or simply seeking authentic connection in your entrepreneurial journey, Rachel's insights remind us that there's always hope after failure—and sometimes
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hello, welcome back to a very special episode of
Overcome Yourself, the podcast.
As you know, my name is Nicoleand I am thrilled, excited,
humbled, to be here with one ofmy mentors, who I even got to
intern with all the way back in2020, right before the whole
world closed down.
(00:21):
That was like the last projectI did, I remember, because we
had to end early.
But here she is, the amazingRachel Peterson.
So, rachel, please take it away.
Introduce yourself.
You are the queen of socialmedia, but let us know a little
bit about who you are and whoyou help.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Oh, I love that.
Nicole, first and foremost Iwant to say thank you for having
me.
I'm so excited to be here.
It's funny that you actuallybrought up the internship,
because just the other day I gotthat little, that itch feeling
again like, ooh, what if we didit even better?
Like, oh my gosh.
So I think about thatinternship all the time to this
(00:59):
day.
So, and it's funny becausesometimes we think that, like,
people don't recognize our namesyou know what I mean Like, oh,
there's no way that theyrecognize my name.
Every time I search for a fewcore assets inside of my drive,
your name comes up and it'sthere.
So I see your name every time Isearch for this one specific
lead magnet and this one.
(01:20):
Isn't that so wild how thatworks.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
I know.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
So I'm Rachel Peterson.
I'm a social media strategist.
At this point, I've been inbusiness for over 10 years and
along the way some really coolthings have happened.
I've worked with clients suchas Dean Graciosi.
Russell Brunson still kind ofblows my mind a little bit
because I just feel like thisyou know, I'm just like a mom
from Minnesota with three kidsand life does not always feel
that glamorous, but business hashad some really cool wins in it
(01:46):
.
I'm an avid writer and reader.
I love movies and studyingstorytelling and psychology and
I'm obsessed with a lot of craftthings, like my curtains behind
me.
I know people can't see it onthe podcast, but I sewed them
for the dimensions of ourwindows and then like arranged
everything.
So I'm kind of just this likehomebody nerd in my personal
(02:09):
life cooking, cleaning, sewing Ilove that stuff, but I'm super
excited to be here.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
I'm so excited that you're here now.
Um, one of the requests thatyou made of me was to ask you
directly.
We in the question one of thequestions in the form you're
like, just ask me this on theshow.
So you've had to overcomeyourself.
You have such an incrediblestory.
It's in your book.
I loved your book, by the way,got to read it on the beach, you
(02:37):
know.
I bought it and every time Iwent to the beach I read it.
So I have that awesomeassociation.
But I want you to tell myaudience your story of how you
went from really broke.
You're a hairdresser, you werean alcoholic and now you're the
queen of social media and you'relike a nerdy homebody and
you're just making things happen.
(02:57):
So tell us the story of Rachel.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Okay, so I grew up the daughter of a pastor and a
worship leader just at differentchurches growing up, and so,
even though I'm actually super,super introverted people don't
believe me on that, but I'm thetype of person where, like I
need alone time.
I don't necessarily want to becenter stage, I'm just as happy
(03:25):
making costumes for a musical asI would be like starring.
In fact, I think I get more joyout of that.
Um, but I learned from an earlyage like kind of how to show up
and be resilient.
I grew up in, um, definitelythe definition of poverty, and
so because of that, like therewere so many life lessons that
my dad specifically likeinstilled in me if you don't
(03:47):
have the time, you better havethe money.
Um, he would say you're asurvivor, survivors never quit,
survivors never give up.
And I was like okay, and thatwas really locked in for me,
those mindsets.
But it didn't exactly get easybefore it got easy.
Still isn't easy, still waitingfor that part to kick in.
(04:09):
But I kind of was like lostwith my life at the age of 20,
which most people are and I waspartying, I was definitely an
alcoholic, I was broke, had somuch debt.
And then all of a sudden, Ifound out I was gonna be had so
much debt.
And then all of a sudden Ifound out I was going to be a
mom at 21.
And I was like I got to figuresomething out.
(04:30):
Anything, I'll take anything.
So I went and applied for jobslike Taco Bell.
Got denied.
I was devastated.
Um, applied at all of the everysingle job I could find online
and nothing was working out andI realized I think I need some
skillset to like get me jobs.
So I went to school for hair,took out another 20 grand right
(04:51):
there in certain loans.
So I'm drowning in debt, singlemom, freshly off of welfare,
and I became a hairstylist.
Now, I worked as a hairstylist.
I loved, loved that job.
I thought it was so fun.
I love hair and like creativityand just beauty.
I love creating beauty.
But, um, while I was working inthat job, I met my husband,
(05:13):
paul, and sorry for another timewe eloped 13 days after we met,
which was, in hindsight, agreat decision for us
specifically, um, but I had thisclient sit down in my chair
after I married paul once.
I was pregnant with baby numbertwo, still in debt.
Still no clue what I'm gonna dowith my life.
(05:34):
Um, this client sat down and westarted talking about like
business and marketing.
And she was like so how do youdo marketing as a hairstylist?
And I was like I don't know, Ijust post, and then they show up
I'll post a before and after ofextensions or a before and
after of a curly hairtransformation, right, like
here's how we defined the curls.
And I was like and then clientsjust book.
(05:56):
And she was like do you want tobe our marketing consultant?
Turns out her and her husbandowned a fast food fried chicken
franchise.
And I was like sure, I don'treally like fried chicken and I
don't really know a lot aboutmarketing, but let's do it.
So I said yes, and then Ilearned everything along the way
as I went, usually just in timefor a meeting or a question,
(06:20):
and that's that was the start ofit.
And then I dove in fully andstarted learning, started
looking for new clients, and ittook me about a year to realize,
oh, I could do this on my ownoutside of, like, the
traditional routes.
So I went for it.
Um, from the time I wentserious I will never forget.
It was November 2015 and I waslike I going to publish the
(06:44):
website and get serious aboutthis and I replaced my income
from my day job within less thansix months, and then I replaced
Paul's income from his day jobwithin a total of nine months.
So in nine months we went fromus both working full time and
the side gig to whoa whoa.
This just replaced both ourjobs.
(07:04):
I think we're kind of seriousabout this now and then.
That's kind of what has evolvedinto where we are today that is
amazing and it's so inspiring.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Right, because you, you didn't have the advantages
that a lot of times we hearother people had.
I had money, I had this, I hadan inheritance, and you, you had
.
I had money, I had this, I hadan inheritance, and you, you had
to.
You had to, you know, crawlyour way up and like, I've
followed along with your storyand I've seen a lot of your
videos and so, you know, you gotthat strong parasocial
(07:35):
relationship and it's just sobeautiful that now you get to,
you get to run your businesswith your husband and you get to
, you know, travel the world andgo to Spain and buy a wedding
dress.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
You know what's funny about that story?
I actually didn't mean to buy awedding dress in Spain, so
because I grew up like poor, Ididn't know that there were real
stores where you had to ring adoorbell to go in.
But I had seen it inbridesmaids and I thought it was
the fanciest, bougiest, coolestthing ever.
And we're walking through thestreets of Spain for an event
(08:10):
for our click students andliterally I see a doorbell and
I'm like Prono Vias, I've heardof that before, let's set up an
appointment.
And I bought my wedding dressin Spain on impulse, kind of
like how I do a lot of things inmy personal life.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
That is cool, but that's so cool that you got to
be there and that you were ableto do that right and just be
like, yeah, I'm taking home thedress, so congratulations,
that's amazing.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
You're very welcome, but you told me that you wanted
to actually talk about somethingthat's a little sensitive, but
it's really important andimpactful, and so we were
talking about 90 Day BusinessMagic, a program that you ran
and I just happened to mentionit because you know I do that
(08:57):
with you too, and then so takeit away.
What is it that you wanted totell me about that?
And what that has to do withfailure.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
So well, let's, let's talk about failure.
So there's somethinginteresting in business and
marketing, but anytime someoneis put into a position of like a
platform or a pedestal, they'reseen as an expert in any
capacity.
There's this like belief theyshould have everything figured
out.
I think we all assume that.
(09:26):
I assumed that for so long thatyou know Marie Forleo's life
was butterflies and roses.
I straight up was like I knowshe says it's not, but I'm not
seeing evidence to proveanything other than she's got
everything together.
And I was like oh, I'm so, Ifeel so messy compared to that,
just because that's what I'mseeing, and I I don't know.
I felt like failure for a longtime.
(09:47):
I felt like it was shame-filledand I had to kind of try to
gloss over it and hide it.
And I've been working for thelast probably five years on
starting to call out my ownfailures faster.
So I had a recent failure and Iwanted to talk about it because
I don't want it to be like oh,a decade ago I made a mistake.
No, I made a mistake last year.
(10:08):
So we launched this programcalled 90 Days Business Magic
and the whole premise was I'mgoing to build this anonymous,
faceless brand, which I stillreally want to do, but I know
not to now.
I want to build this anonymous,faceless brand related to
sewing, which is one of mypassions, I love it so much, and
(10:30):
then I'm going to allow peopleto watch me build it Like watch
my entire process happen.
And then this has neverhappened like this before.
As soon as we launched both so90 day business magic is open
I'm excited and stoked aboutsewing house I was like this is
going to be, this is gonna behuge.
(10:50):
Suddenly, like it was theperfect storm of medical issues,
grief, uh, a situation happenedwith a family member that was
intense and I was like I don'tknow how to dig out of this one.
And I don't know, nicole, areyou like this?
I?
I struggle to cut loose likethings that aren't working.
(11:16):
I will hold on to something forever and be like no, I can
still fix this.
Do you ever feel that way too?
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
I relate, yes, yes.
And there comes a point and someof us ignore it, me included
where it's like this is notworking and I'm spending so much
energy now just trying to makethis work and I don't know what
it is, but I can't see it whileI'm in it and I just kept trying
and I was like lim what it is,but I can't see it while I'm in
it and I just kept trying and Iwas like limping along through
(11:47):
this and meanwhile I mean I hadthis medical adverse reaction to
a prescription and it was likemaking me lethargic and I had no
energy and this snowball ofthings I was like I don't even
know where to start and it tookme quite a few months to finally
be like I messed up, I can'tdig out of this one.
(12:10):
I probably should have said thislike three, four months ago,
but I was just like, oh my gosh,I actually have to abandon ship
and then address the shipthat's sinking behind me.
And thankfully it wasn't like abig thing, it wasn't like
sewing houses built up, and thenwe didn't have stock for the
orders we had just collected orsomething like that.
(12:31):
There was the business managerside and I was like, oh, I feel
so awful because this 90 daybusiness magic group they still
got to see my inner workings ofhow I approach business and
there was a lot in depth.
But I was like I just feel likecrap.
And because I felt like crapabout this failure, which is a
common pattern, I was like maybeI'll just keep trying harder to
(12:53):
overcompensate.
So it was like I'd go under andthen I would overcompensate and
I'm like still not fixing it.
And I wanted to talk about itbecause it's recent and it
sucked and it stung.
And I even had one person reportme to the Better Business
Bureau because she was like thisis not good.
And I was like you know what?
(13:14):
I'm going to own it this timeand face it as early as I can.
Now that I realize this isfailing, I'm going to take it on
and be okay with it, cancelpayments, make refunds as
necessary.
But dang, I messed this up.
It was not the right offer, notthe right timing, and there's
something so beautiful aboutbeing able to have a recent one
to reference now for, yep, thatwas a failure, so yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
But you ended up pivoting.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
I pivoted once.
So that was another attempt tolike let's write the ship, let's
, let's do everything we can andI there is something to be said
, you might agree with me onthis.
There's something to be saidfor trying to write the ship.
Like, what can we do to try,you know, pivot and make a
course correct?
So I pivoted into a whole othertopic, which was um,
(14:05):
meditations, affirmations andhypnosis just the ones that you
listen to that are positivewhile you sleep or while you're
just like.
I just need a quick pick me upbecause I I'm obsessed with
those.
I love them huge fan.
I love nlp.
I study it pretty obsessivelyand I started there.
And then it still didn't work.
Nicole and I was like I am souncomfortable with every single
(14:29):
thing about this, I'muncomfortable with all decisions
.
I shed a lot of tears because Iwas like I feel like a failure
and I've got this email fromSarah that is reminding me that
I am a complete and totalfailure.
Okay, maybe it's time toactually say I gave it a good go
.
I attempted to upright the shipand nothing worked.
(14:50):
Those are the hardest momentswhen you put your all in and
something just doesn't.
It just isn't connecting orworking, but that's yeah.
That was the after the firstbig pivot.
I was like for some reason thisisn't working, or my heart's
not in it or something you know.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
Yes, and so what advice do you have for someone
who's facing that and who saysyou know what this is not
working Like?
Where, where do you, where doyou go from there?
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Ooh Okay.
So something I struggle withand others might feel the same
way is when I'm faced withimpending doom, like something
that just isn't working.
I struggle with feeling like,with honoring the step back
(15:39):
needed.
So I am a big believer that wecan step back and analyze the
situation, but we actually haveto create a little distance for
a few days or a week.
You know what I mean Like fullystep back.
I'm going to take a break, I'mgoing to pause and it needs to
be communicated.
I am going to reevaluate somethings because this is not
(15:59):
flowing how I wanted it to.
I'll let you guys know what Icome up with in a week.
So stepping back can be a reallyhelpful thing.
That's also helped me a lot inrelationships.
So if I'm in a conversationwith, like a kid or with Paul
and it's not that we're likescreaming or throwing things,
but like if we're at an impasseI'll say, hey, I don't think
(16:21):
we're going to get on the samepage today.
Are you cool if we, you know,bring this up tomorrow or the
day after, after we get somegood sleep?
You know like let's go have aweekend sleep and then let's
talk about this.
So the step back is huge.
And then being like, okay,let's get radically aware of why
didn't this work?
How can I prevent that fromhappening?
Is this a sinking ship?
(16:51):
That's inevitable?
Or is there just a few holes weneed to plug through stepping
back, so that step back iseverything?
And then kind of having thatradical self-awareness of, oh,
this doesn't work because I amwired this way and this is not
something I want to change atthis time, that's a huge thing.
Have you found things like thatto be helpful?
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Yes, it makes me think of the book the Untethered
Soul and learning to take astep back.
I don't know if you were theone that I know you recommended
Happy Pocket Full of Money, soI'm in the process of reading
that that one's like.
So I'm in the process ofreading that that one's like.
(17:48):
I don't know what I wasexpecting, but it was not.
It was like quantum physicsfrom chapter one.
You know what I mean, but it'snot happening to you.
It's it's happening to you, butlike you're watching it and so
you, you create that separation.
So things are easier, it's lessemotional, it's it's more you
can look at the whole board,versus being stuck in that
moment um, because then you getstuck in fight or flight.
Freeze, yeah you know, and andthen you're not helpful to
yourself or to anyone.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
It's so true, and especially for those of us who
who maybe I mean, I know I'mwired this way where it's like I
have to be doing to prove myworth um gotta stay busy, you
gotta prove you're working hard,you've gotta um like some of
the things that were instilledin me about hard work were are
(18:30):
really helpful in many ways, andin some ways, like that is a
limit, it's a limiting belieflike I have to work hard always
to be making good money.
I have to be doing to prove myvalue.
And the truth is we allprobably need to spend like at
least one day a week steppingback and being the observer, and
(18:51):
I know I need that.
So the in-betweens are just asimportant as the doing, if not
more important to make sure thatwhen I'm doing, it's the right
things in the right way or thebest way.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Yes, getting comfortable with being instead
of doing and just being.
That's been a big lesson for me, really.
Yes, yeah, yeah, especiallywith our hustle culture, right,
like we're always, like you said, just going, going, going.
You have to be productive, butrest is productive.
(19:26):
You have to be productive, butrest is productive.
(19:49):
You know, taking time off, likeyou said, if you're so busy and
there's so much going on aroundyou?
Speaker 2 (19:51):
how are you going to connect with the source?
How you know, like, how are yougoing to hear back from you?
Know, those, those inklingslike the you know, like our
intuition, like we can't hear itif we're too busy doing a bunch
of other stuff?
I do think that's where, um,having like mentors or
consultants or even just likesounding boards is so big.
People who can, you know, stepback as the observer when you're
like in intense moments, andthey can say, hey, I'm just
going to be honest with you,that's not even what you want to
(20:11):
be doing right now.
Like this is so not a focus?
I think that you can table thisfor later.
You don't have to abandon it,but you can come back to it.
Or hey, no, I saw your facelight up when you were talking
about this.
I think you're letting fearstop you.
Like those voices in our lives.
They can step in as those stopthat gap observers.
(20:33):
When we're in busy seasons andespecially for those of us who
have, like kids, you know it'salways a busy- season, you don't
know what a Tuesday is going tobring.
So for me that's Paul.
It's been mentors and then,like I, get to go into companies
as a consultant and they're tooclose to the force.
They're staring at each reel'sperformance and I'm like no,
look at the bigger picture, lookat what this is all creating.
(20:57):
Don't focus on the one thatdidn't perform.
Look at this.
So that's where those soundingboards can be so big.
And yeah, Paul's my number one.
I don't pay him enough for that, but he's great.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
And I think that speaks to the importance of
community.
Right, like we can't, we can'tdo this alone, like no matter
what type of business you haveor no matter what type of life
you have, even if you're not inbusiness, we, we need community,
we need mentors.
Yeah, we need community.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
We need mentors.
Yeah, so I need them, that'sfor sure.
Every every day or week, I'mtalking to someone who we act
for sounding boards for eachother.
Is this a good idea?
Have you seen this?
Do you think this would help me?
You know?
And that saves so much time.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Yes, it's like masterminding right, and
something that I talk about inmy book is books.
Is, you know, getting with yourmentors and reading their books
and watching their free videos?
You know like you provide a lotof free resources.
I wanted to ask you about that,you know, because I feel like
you want to make thingsaccessible to everyone and you
(22:08):
talk in your content about howyou are one of those freebie
people.
That's how you got started,that's how I got started, so can
you, can you talk to me alittle bit about how that plays
a role in your business and inhow you help others?
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Yes, so you know how some people are money hardwired.
They love making money.
They love, they love money.
They love the process of it.
I've never been naturallyhardwired that way.
I don't know how much is in mybank account at any given time.
I didn't when I was poor either.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I just didn't care.
I was like I'll just see whathappens.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
I don't spend much money and I think that actually
would surprise most people.
I'm very thrifty, very cheap.
If my kids are like can we getcanes?
I'm like, I don't like friedchicken, but I can make killer
fried chicken at home.
I'm the make it at home mom, andI think sometimes my kids wish
I weren't that way.
But money like to me theperfect society wouldn't have
(23:07):
money, even though I know thatthat's not real, like it doesn't
really exist in this day andage.
So for me, money doesn'tmotivate me as much as seeing
people create change.
And so an interesting thing isthat I know that to run a
business hire a team, leadpeople, provide things at the
(23:29):
level I want to it all does costmoney.
So I'm like cool, I'm going torelease as much as I can for
free, and some things will beorganized and compiled to make
sure that this, basically thisinstitution, can keep running
itself without us running intothe ground or anything.
So free things, I will say,have transformed my life and the
(23:50):
lives of millions of otherpeople.
I am a huge believer in free.
It's how I decide who I'm goingto like and trust.
It's how I find what I'm goingto fall in love with.
Cheap is amazing too.
I know a lot of people in myspace they will just talk down
about, like freebie seekers andlow ticket offers, but when I
(24:12):
was a single mom on welfare, Ineeded a pair of dress shoes for
a wedding and I found a pair.
I won't say what brand it is,but I found a pair of designer
shoes for 99 cents and they werebeat up, but they worked really
well.
I still have them in my closet,I still wear them, I still love
them, and now I know that thatdesigner creates lasting,
(24:34):
quality clothes.
So if I ever needed a fancydress and I was at a store that
had that designer, I might belike huh, okay, this one will
last the test of time.
So there's something about freeand cheap that can actually
bring in premium buyers in a waythat most people wouldn't
expect, and it's a great way to,you know, make yourself stand
(24:56):
out from the sea of people whoare peddling stuff they've never
even done so yeah love that andthat is such a great analogy.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
I love thrift shopping, I love the treasure
hunts.
Um, I found so many good things, you know, and then they're
very inexpensive.
You're like, oh yes, theydidn't know what this was.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Yes, that's what we always think well there are
certain stores we'll walk intoand we're like oh, they know,
they know and all of us are highand you're like no, I was
looking for the weird hidden gemwith like a you know chipped
enamel on the front or somethingyou know, yes, yeah, yes, yes,
and I'm also very like my.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
my grandma was a seamstress, and so you know like
I learned to say okay, okay,hold on.
Hold on, hold on.
I got another one for you.
My birthday is April 1st, noway you're an april fool too yes
, yes, yes, yes.
I was like oh my god, I have toremember to tell her that I'm
(25:56):
so glad you remembered um.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Okay, so do you love your april 1st birthday?
Sorry, I know this is a tangent, but do you love your april 1st
birthday?
Speaker 1 (26:04):
no, everyone birthday .
No, everyone loves to playpranks.
Nobody believed I was beingborn, yep.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
I love it, but everyone always thinks I'm
joking when I say it's mybirthday and I'm like well then,
I've been joking for 36 yearsbecause it is still my birthday,
so I love it though.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Oh, we're twins, I know right, Different years, but
we're twins.
And then both of our grandmaswere seamstresses, so so, yeah,
so we were talking about thethrift store and how, like you
know, if I find something andlike there's a button missing,
I'm like I can fix it.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
Yeah, I know, I'm currently working on my button
jar.
You know how my grandma both mygrandmas had button jars and
they just collected buttons.
Yes, so I'm working on mybutton jar.
Both, both of my daughtersactually mostly my older
daughter, dakota she's beensewing a lot of stuffed animals
by hand.
We have a scrap bin where allof our old clothes with cool
(26:59):
fabrics.
We put them there so that wenever have to buy fabric for
test projects or even full-onprojects.
It makes me sound like I'm likecheap, but I'm like, yeah, I
literally grew up scrappy.
So, um, yeah, she was like, doyou have a button jar?
And I was like that's what I'mmissing.
I don't have a button jar yet.
So, oh, I love that, you knowall of that.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
Yes, I'm thinking about my button jar.
It's like in this littleplastic, and then it has the
little ladle and the whole thingis full and you know you can
see through it.
It's like in this little plastic, and then it has the little
ladle and the whole thing isfull and you know you could see
through it, it's so cool I love,and I'm pretty sure, um, I
collected them from differentgrandmas and stuff, you know,
and I put them all together, um,so, yeah, there you go, that's,
you can look for buttons in thethrift store anyway, um, you
(27:45):
are so much fun, um, all right,one.
One last thing that I wanted totalk to you about, one of the
big foundational things of mybook, like the, the secret sauce
I discovered, right, like whatI found at the at the bottom of
the well, or, so to speak, umgratitude.
Can you talk to me a little bitabout what role gratitude has
(28:05):
played in your journey?
It?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
needs to be like breathing.
It needs to be like breathing.
Okay, so, as I built my entirebusiness one of the hard parts
for me is I'm a very verbalprocessor.
Whether I'm by myself andtalking into like talk to text,
or I'm journaling, I got to getwords out.
(28:27):
And the first time that I builtmy business, I realized almost
for and I say the first timebecause there wasn't, there was
a clear before and after in thefirst, like the come up, the
first big come up, I realizedthat not everybody else was like
living and breathing thebusiness the same way I was, and
(28:49):
so it made me feel very like,not isolated.
But I kept a lot to myself,which just basically meant that
I was limiting the expressionsof gratitude throughout the day,
and so it wasn't as enjoyable.
I wasn't grateful for oh wow,we sold this program today.
That's so fun.
(29:09):
Oh wow, our new student justgot this from this.
That's incredible.
I really missed out on justsavoring the moments and I felt
like maybe if I try harder orbuild this bigger or make it
more impressive, more peoplewill care as much as I do, and
that was not what flipped theswitch at all.
It was actually gratitude thathad to come first.
(29:31):
So three years ago I had like apublic breakdown.
It's fully documented, it'severywhere.
Zero out of 10 recommend.
But it was wild because when Icame back I had to kind of
basically rebuild everything,because overnight I pretty much
well, not overnight, it was likethree months.
I had to kind of basicallyrebuild everything because
overnight I pretty much well,not overnight, it was like three
months.
I tanked my reputation andpeople were like now we're
(29:53):
nervous about her.
And so I came back and therewere a lot of crickets in a lot
of places that used to have alot of chatter and I was just
like this is uncomfortable.
And so I decided to start withgratitude as much as possible.
And over the last three yearsit has gotten to the point where
I wake up and I go and this isso cheesy because I always said
(30:16):
I wouldn't be this person I'm sograteful for this cozy bed and
then but I'm also grateful thatI get to have some coffee, let's
wake up, and then Paul and Imake the bed and that's our act
of like gratitude for the bed,the linens, everything I used to
like.
Be annoyed with the people whoare always like gratitude,
gratitude, gratitude and truthbe told, it has changed
(30:38):
everything.
I swear my face like it hasbeen lighting up differently
lately, because I'm experiencinggratitude in the small just as
much as the big, if not more,that's such a big deal.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Um, the soul of money .
Um, it was recommended to meand there is a quote where it
was talking about abundance,like how, how, like, yeah, it
shows up.
And so, like, when you firstwake up in the morning, if
you're like, oh, I didn't getenough sleep again, yes, that's
(31:11):
a symptom of lack.
Speaker 2 (31:13):
Yes, and then right then you're vibrating at the
resonance of lack.
So it sounds weird, but youhave to focus on here's what we
do have.
There's an abundance of.
Oh.
We've got heat.
In the winter it might not beas hot as I want, but it is here
.
I'm grateful for that.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
Yeah, ac in the summer.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
So grateful this summer especially.
But yeah, and I know a lot oftimes people will say like but
how can you be grateful when youdon't feel like you have
anything and what?
I would challenge people to do?
So I'm bipolar type one, whichmeans that there's stuff that
happens internally that peopledon't always see.
(31:57):
So there are struggles,abundant everywhere.
Ok, you know what?
I'm abundant?
That I have a brain that canhandle multiple thoughts at once
, cool, ok.
So there's abundance.
I'm grateful that my beddoesn't have to be in my kitchen
.
I'm grateful for that, so youcan look for what is true.
(32:18):
And just by doing that, youwill attract to be like oh,
things aren't going how I want.
Now I'm like got to stop, goback, go back to gratitude.
What is going well?
(32:41):
Let's focus there.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
Yes, and it's to help you reframe right, because
we're looking at the same thing,we're just looking at it a
little bit differently.
It makes me think of theglasses.
Remember from National Treasurethat they had to change all the
lenses and they were looking atthe same map, but depending on
which lens.
Now you got to go back andwatch it with your kids.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
Okay, I haven't watched it because I don't like
Nicolas Cage.
Now I need to see that scenebecause I'm going to use that.
I'm going to say Nicole Tuxburytaught me this a really cool
framework.
It comes from National Treasure.
No, but like I love that.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
Yeah, but that's what it is right and we have a whole
section of our brain that ishelpful to us in practicing
gratitude, like that's wheregratitude comes from, and so we
have to practice it.
We, you know it's just like youcan't do a hundred pushups
right now If you've never done apushup in your life.
Like it's going to be reallyhard to try to be like a hundred
(33:39):
things I'm grateful for.
But as we go practicing, littleby little, we get stronger and
it gets easier and so I love it.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Something that always helps me too with that, because
sometimes I can get really intoa state of like victimhood and
feel really sorry for myself.
I get very negative if I'm notcareful, and so I sometimes have
to go to like the basics andI'll go.
Okay, I can't do a single pushup, but I have arms.
I'm grateful I have arms.
(34:08):
Okay, what's this?
Well, somewhere in therethere's a muscle.
So I have muscles and mymuscles can grow.
Okay, I'm grateful for that.
And then I'm like that's all Igot.
Today I'm going to try onepushup and like that helps me
when I'm like in that like supernegative place and be like
let's go back to the most basicthings.
Would life be harder withoutarms?
(34:29):
Yes, I have friends.
Without arms it is there aremore challenges.
So today I'm grateful for theseextensions and that actually
does do some reframing for me.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
Yes, and like gratitude, like you said it's
the studies show that it caneven improve your health like it
can help you feel less pain.
So like these are documentedthings and so, like you're
saying, just feeling thatgratitude for those body parts
is bringing awareness, you'rebringing more blood, like it's
just a cascade of differentthings that happen just by you
(35:01):
taking a moment to get into yourbody, because, especially us,
we're neurodivergent.
Sometimes it sounds reallyweird if you're not, but like
you feel like life is happeningsomewhere else and you're over
here and so doing things likethat, like I'm grateful for my
hands, I'm grateful for my arms,I'm grateful that my back hurts
, because at least I can stillfeel it, I can still walk um,
(35:22):
that helps us reframe and thatbrings attention to those body
parts and then it helps, ithelps with other things.
So I love that.
I think that's amazing, um, andI love your examples of how you
apply it, like in your, in yourreal life.
Like as soon as you wake upyeah, it's not like I didn't get
enough sleep it's like oh, mygod, this bed is so comfy.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
I love it, yeah, and you know, and you're intentional
about creating that yeah, andthen I also try to like anchor
things in with specific things.
One of my go-toos is like a.
So it's a, it's a celebrationlike a.
So that's what I do always Likewhen I'm backstage before I'm
(36:02):
about to speak at events, Ialways go.
This will be so great.
So I'm on like a ton of videosfor people's events where I'm
backstage going and it's like ahype up and you can feel the
energy in your body.
So I'll do that when I'm likeokay, I got five hours of sleep
last night.
Okay, I was already tiredbefore I went to bed.
(36:24):
Okay, I'm alive.
I woke up, I get another chance, I'm grateful I might be able
to sleep tonight.
Okay, and then it like tricksyour, your mind into thinking
okay, the body's saying we'rehappy, let's let, maybe let's
follow.
That can help me quite a bit.
So those little weird ritualsthat create positive energy.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
Yeah, just like I've heard.
Like standing in superhero poseyeah, that's super helpful
before you go into a meeting orsomething.
You imagine yourself as asuperhero, as a king or a queen,
um, and then that helps youbring that energy into, into
whatever it is that you're doing.
So I love that.
That is so cool and I love howyou share like real life
examples right, because it's onething for somebody to be like
(37:07):
stand like this, but you're likeno, when I'm on backstage, like
I probably look so wild.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
But yeah, these are such good questions, my gosh
thank you.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Thank you so much, yeah, um so, as we're wrapping
up here, um, you mentioned thatyou have a gift for the audience
.
I'd love it if you could tellus a little bit about that.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
For sure.
Okay, so is it cool if Iactually just bring it up here
now, because I do have somethingthat I think would be really
helpful?
Are you cool with that, Nicole?
Yes, of course.
So I have.
This is going to be reallyhelpful because I can sit here
and talk about how gratitude andlike pause we could talk all
(37:54):
day, by the way you're so great.
We can talk all day aboutgratitude and like the power of
positive thinking.
But when someone's in like thatplace where they're like I'm so
burnt out and overwhelmed Ican't even care at this point.
It's really hard to get out ofthat and I know that because I
experience it.
Point it's really hard to getout of that and I know that
(38:15):
because I experience it.
So when you're in that burntout right, that burnt out place,
you almost need someone to say,hey, here's a lifeline to just
pull you a little closer toshore so you stand a chance to
swim to shore.
So I actually put together anentire guide for the exact steps
that I do.
This isn't available anywhereelse um, it's not on my website
for this one.
So it's the burnout guide.
(38:35):
I don't remember the title, Ihaven't released it, but it's
this burnout guide that helpsyou when you're overwhelmed,
there's too much to do andyou're in a negative slump and
nothing seems to be working.
So I would love to gift that toyour audience.
I'll make sure you get all thedetails, and then anything else
that you need support with youcan go to r Petersoncom.
I'll use an a D in my last nameand there's just tons of free
(38:57):
stuff on my site.
It's more free than even paid.
You'll see that very quickly Ilove that.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
I appreciate that so much and your resources are
amazing.
Like it's not like you'regetting like a little like
pretend thing and be like ha ha,you have to go to the next
level to get the results.
Yeah, no, no.
Like you actually providereally good value up front, and
so I just want to let you knowthat I do appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
I love creating them because I create them based on
what I want to see and whatwould make me say this person's
the real deal.
I like to see action andresults happen, even from
freebies, so people can get thatfree resource.
And even if you just latch onto like one of the concepts in
there and you're like thishelped make getting out of bed
today 10% easier Cool, that wasa win in my book.
Speaker 1 (39:48):
All of the links that she mentioned are going to be
available down in the show notes, and usually we wrap up with
your biggest tip.
So, like, what is the biggest,best aha moment that your
clients get?
Like, what's that tip that yougive them?
Speaker 2 (40:03):
Yes, okay.
So when my clients and I areworking together, every single
one of them experiences andexpresses doubt in different
ways.
So some it's through control,wanting to know every single
number at all times, and some itlooks like emotional, like
(40:27):
brain dumps and vents and thingslike that.
And so something I just want toremind everybody is that we all
express fear or doubt or thosethings that are stopping us from
taking action differently.
So don't try to suppress that,but instead express it.
Get out there.
Get it out like journal it.
(40:48):
Go punch a boxing bag If that'syour style it's clearly not
mine, um but do the thing thathelps you, like get past the
doubt, the fear, the, the Idon't know if I can do this or I
don't see the path like expressit so that you can move on,
because it's been acknowledgedby your brain.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
I love that taking action, just creating something,
creating something, and youknow what it made me think of?
I was watching a nurse.
She is an OBGYN nurse.
She helps women who are givingbirth, and she noticed a
phenomenon when they're becauseyou know, like there's different
stages to giving birth and theneach stage has different stages
(41:32):
.
I don't know if you saw thisvideo, but the moment that you
go from like you know, like thecontractions happening, to like
it's time to push, right,there's a moment where the mom
says something to the effect ofI can't do this, yes, this is
hard, I need to go to thebathroom.
Can't do this, yes, this is toohard, I need to go to the
(41:56):
bathroom.
And that is how the nurses knowthat it's time to push, that
their body is ready to push iswhen they think they can't.
That's the moment where thingsare about to get real, and so is
that cool, right?
And so just to back end yourencouragement if you feel like,
oh, my god, I can't do this,this is the moment where
something is about to be birthed.
That's beautiful in your lifeand you just got to keep moving.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
I love that, okay, I want to add to that because, oh
my gosh, nicole, we couldliterally talk all day, I'm not
joking.
So when I was about to givebirth to, dominic was one of the
most um, one of the most like Iwas.
I was the most vocal with whatI wanted to say and I made all
the doctors and nurses stop andI made them look at me and I
(42:39):
needed to know that they werelistening and I said I just need
you to acknowledge for me whatI'm about to do.
Physically doesn't make sense.
This seems impossible.
How is a baby supposed to comeout of me?
Can you please, real fast, justacknowledge for me that this is
impossible by what I know.
And they're like, yes, and Iwas like, ok, let's go.
(43:00):
And then it was like, ok,that's fine, as long as you can
tell me this is impossible andit's still somehow going to
happen.
Same thing is true in business.
Yes, yes.
Speaker 1 (43:10):
Oh, that's beautiful.
And so that moment of failurewhere it feels like you just
can't anymore, um, that's, youknow, that's where magic.
So, since we're talking aboutfailure, I just wanted to offer
some encouragement.
We've all been there, um, andthere's there's beauty on the
(43:30):
other side.
Um, I haven't talked about thisa lot, but I was Baker acted
when I was younger as well, andso I had to go into the hospital
, and so I just want to.
You know, I feel safe becauseyou talk about it all the time,
but there is hope.
There is hope after depression,there is hope after
hopelessness, and so, yeah, Ijust wanted to.
(43:51):
I just thought I should mentionthat.
I thought it was important,since this episode is really
powerful, like this is somepowerful stuff we talked about
today.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
There is definitely like life after challenges,
failures, public failures,there's life after a psych ward.
I want to put that out therebecause more people cord.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
I want to put that out there because more people
hide that than I think werealize you know, yeah, so I was
there and, and yeah, so I justwanted to let you know that I
know, I know, I know.
All right, so, before we dosign off, the only thing we
haven't talked about is how dowe follow you on social media.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
Oh, easiest place is pretty much on every single
platform.
I'm at the mrs peterson, or ifyou search for rachel peterson,
with all e's and a d in my lastname, it'll come up pretty fast
awesome, perfect.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
Thank you so much.
This has been just absolutelyamazing, rachel, you are an
absolute gem.
You're just an angel.
Speaker 2 (44:50):
I just so appreciate you so much for taking the time
to hang out with me today thiswas easy breezy like this didn't
feel like, oh, it's anappearance, so thank you for
having me thank you and thankyou guys for joining us.
Speaker 1 (45:04):
This has been amazing and we'll catch you guys next
time on the next episode ofovercome yourself, the podcast
bye.
Hello, welcome back to a very special episode of
Overcome Yourself, the podcast.
As you know, my name is Nicoleand I am thrilled, excited,
humbled, to be here with one ofmy mentors, who I even got to
intern with all the way back in2020, right before the whole
world closed down.
(00:21):
That was like the last projectI did, I remember, because we
had to end early.
But here she is, the amazingRachel Peterson.
So, rachel, please take it away.
Introduce yourself.
You are the queen of socialmedia, but let us know a little
bit about who you are and whoyou help.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Oh, I love that.
Nicole, first and foremost Iwant to say thank you for having
me.
I'm so excited to be here.
It's funny that you actuallybrought up the internship,
because just the other day I gotthat little, that itch feeling
again like, ooh, what if we didit even better?
Like, oh my gosh.
So I think about thatinternship all the time to this
(00:59):
day.
So, and it's funny becausesometimes we think that, like,
people don't recognize our namesyou know what I mean Like, oh,
there's no way that theyrecognize my name.
Every time I search for a fewcore assets inside of my drive,
your name comes up and it'sthere.
So I see your name every time Isearch for this one specific
lead magnet and this one.
(01:20):
Isn't that so wild how thatworks.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
I know.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
So I'm Rachel Peterson.
I'm a social media strategist.
At this point, I've been inbusiness for over 10 years and
along the way some really coolthings have happened.
I've worked with clients suchas Dean Graciosi.
Russell Brunson still kind ofblows my mind a little bit
because I just feel like thisyou know, I'm just like a mom
from Minnesota with three kidsand life does not always feel
that glamorous, but business hashad some really cool wins in it
(01:46):
.
I'm an avid writer and reader.
I love movies and studyingstorytelling and psychology and
I'm obsessed with a lot of craftthings, like my curtains behind
me.
I know people can't see it onthe podcast, but I sewed them
for the dimensions of ourwindows and then like arranged
everything.
So I'm kind of just this likehomebody nerd in my personal
(02:09):
life cooking, cleaning, sewing Ilove that stuff, but I'm super
excited to be here.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
I'm so excited that you're here now.
Um, one of the requests thatyou made of me was to ask you
directly.
We in the question one of thequestions in the form you're
like, just ask me this on theshow.
So you've had to overcomeyourself.
You have such an incrediblestory.
It's in your book.
I loved your book, by the way,got to read it on the beach, you
(02:37):
know.
I bought it and every time Iwent to the beach I read it.
So I have that awesomeassociation.
But I want you to tell myaudience your story of how you
went from really broke.
You're a hairdresser, you werean alcoholic and now you're the
queen of social media and you'relike a nerdy homebody and
you're just making things happen.
(02:57):
So tell us the story of Rachel.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Okay, so I grew up the daughter of a pastor and a
worship leader just at differentchurches growing up, and so,
even though I'm actually super,super introverted people don't
believe me on that, but I'm thetype of person where, like I
need alone time.
I don't necessarily want to becenter stage, I'm just as happy
(03:25):
making costumes for a musical asI would be like starring.
In fact, I think I get more joyout of that.
Um, but I learned from an earlyage like kind of how to show up
and be resilient.
I grew up in, um, definitelythe definition of poverty, and
so because of that, like therewere so many life lessons that
my dad specifically likeinstilled in me if you don't
(03:47):
have the time, you better havethe money.
Um, he would say you're asurvivor, survivors never quit,
survivors never give up.
And I was like okay, and thatwas really locked in for me,
those mindsets.
But it didn't exactly get easybefore it got easy.
Still isn't easy, still waitingfor that part to kick in.
(04:09):
But I kind of was like lostwith my life at the age of 20,
which most people are and I waspartying, I was definitely an
alcoholic, I was broke, had somuch debt.
And then all of a sudden, Ifound out I was gonna be had so
much debt.
And then all of a sudden Ifound out I was going to be a
mom at 21.
And I was like I got to figuresomething out.
(04:30):
Anything, I'll take anything.
So I went and applied for jobslike Taco Bell.
Got denied.
I was devastated.
Um, applied at all of the everysingle job I could find online
and nothing was working out andI realized I think I need some
skillset to like get me jobs.
So I went to school for hair,took out another 20 grand right
(04:51):
there in certain loans.
So I'm drowning in debt, singlemom, freshly off of welfare,
and I became a hairstylist.
Now, I worked as a hairstylist.
I loved, loved that job.
I thought it was so fun.
I love hair and like creativityand just beauty.
I love creating beauty.
But, um, while I was working inthat job, I met my husband,
(05:13):
paul, and sorry for another timewe eloped 13 days after we met,
which was, in hindsight, agreat decision for us
specifically, um, but I had thisclient sit down in my chair
after I married paul once.
I was pregnant with baby numbertwo, still in debt.
Still no clue what I'm gonna dowith my life.
(05:34):
Um, this client sat down and westarted talking about like
business and marketing.
And she was like so how do youdo marketing as a hairstylist?
And I was like I don't know, Ijust post, and then they show up
I'll post a before and after ofextensions or a before and
after of a curly hairtransformation, right, like
here's how we defined the curls.
And I was like and then clientsjust book.
(05:56):
And she was like do you want tobe our marketing consultant?
Turns out her and her husbandowned a fast food fried chicken
franchise.
And I was like sure, I don'treally like fried chicken and I
don't really know a lot aboutmarketing, but let's do it.
So I said yes, and then Ilearned everything along the way
as I went, usually just in timefor a meeting or a question,
(06:20):
and that's that was the start ofit.
And then I dove in fully andstarted learning, started
looking for new clients, and ittook me about a year to realize,
oh, I could do this on my ownoutside of, like, the
traditional routes.
So I went for it.
Um, from the time I wentserious I will never forget.
It was November 2015 and I waslike I going to publish the
(06:44):
website and get serious aboutthis and I replaced my income
from my day job within less thansix months, and then I replaced
Paul's income from his day jobwithin a total of nine months.
So in nine months we went fromus both working full time and
the side gig to whoa whoa.
This just replaced both ourjobs.
(07:04):
I think we're kind of seriousabout this now and then.
That's kind of what has evolvedinto where we are today that is
amazing and it's so inspiring.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Right, because you, you didn't have the advantages
that a lot of times we hearother people had.
I had money, I had this, I hadan inheritance, and you, you had
.
I had money, I had this, I hadan inheritance, and you, you had
to.
You had to, you know, crawlyour way up and like, I've
followed along with your storyand I've seen a lot of your
videos and so, you know, you gotthat strong parasocial
(07:35):
relationship and it's just sobeautiful that now you get to,
you get to run your businesswith your husband and you get to
, you know, travel the world andgo to Spain and buy a wedding
dress.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
You know what's funny about that story?
I actually didn't mean to buy awedding dress in Spain, so
because I grew up like poor, Ididn't know that there were real
stores where you had to ring adoorbell to go in.
But I had seen it inbridesmaids and I thought it was
the fanciest, bougiest, coolestthing ever.
And we're walking through thestreets of Spain for an event
(08:10):
for our click students andliterally I see a doorbell and
I'm like Prono Vias, I've heardof that before, let's set up an
appointment.
And I bought my wedding dressin Spain on impulse, kind of
like how I do a lot of things inmy personal life.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
That is cool, but that's so cool that you got to
be there and that you were ableto do that right and just be
like, yeah, I'm taking home thedress, so congratulations,
that's amazing.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
You're very welcome, but you told me that you wanted
to actually talk about somethingthat's a little sensitive, but
it's really important andimpactful, and so we were
talking about 90 Day BusinessMagic, a program that you ran
and I just happened to mentionit because you know I do that
(08:57):
with you too, and then so takeit away.
What is it that you wanted totell me about that?
And what that has to do withfailure.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
So well, let's, let's talk about failure.
So there's somethinginteresting in business and
marketing, but anytime someoneis put into a position of like a
platform or a pedestal, they'reseen as an expert in any
capacity.
There's this like belief theyshould have everything figured
out.
I think we all assume that.
(09:26):
I assumed that for so long thatyou know Marie Forleo's life
was butterflies and roses.
I straight up was like I knowshe says it's not, but I'm not
seeing evidence to proveanything other than she's got
everything together.
And I was like oh, I'm so, Ifeel so messy compared to that,
just because that's what I'mseeing, and I I don't know.
I felt like failure for a longtime.
(09:47):
I felt like it was shame-filledand I had to kind of try to
gloss over it and hide it.
And I've been working for thelast probably five years on
starting to call out my ownfailures faster.
So I had a recent failure and Iwanted to talk about it because
I don't want it to be like oh,a decade ago I made a mistake.
No, I made a mistake last year.
(10:08):
So we launched this programcalled 90 Days Business Magic
and the whole premise was I'mgoing to build this anonymous,
faceless brand, which I stillreally want to do, but I know
not to now.
I want to build this anonymous,faceless brand related to
sewing, which is one of mypassions, I love it so much, and
(10:30):
then I'm going to allow peopleto watch me build it Like watch
my entire process happen.
And then this has neverhappened like this before.
As soon as we launched both so90 day business magic is open
I'm excited and stoked aboutsewing house I was like this is
going to be, this is gonna behuge.
(10:50):
Suddenly, like it was theperfect storm of medical issues,
grief, uh, a situation happenedwith a family member that was
intense and I was like I don'tknow how to dig out of this one.
And I don't know, nicole, areyou like this?
I?
I struggle to cut loose likethings that aren't working.
(11:16):
I will hold on to something forever and be like no, I can
still fix this.
Do you ever feel that way too?
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
I relate, yes, yes.
And there comes a point and someof us ignore it, me included
where it's like this is notworking and I'm spending so much
energy now just trying to makethis work and I don't know what
it is, but I can't see it whileI'm in it and I just kept trying
and I was like lim what it is,but I can't see it while I'm in
it and I just kept trying and Iwas like limping along through
(11:47):
this and meanwhile I mean I hadthis medical adverse reaction to
a prescription and it was likemaking me lethargic and I had no
energy and this snowball ofthings I was like I don't even
know where to start and it tookme quite a few months to finally
be like I messed up, I can'tdig out of this one.
(12:10):
I probably should have said thislike three, four months ago,
but I was just like, oh my gosh,I actually have to abandon ship
and then address the shipthat's sinking behind me.
And thankfully it wasn't like abig thing, it wasn't like
sewing houses built up, and thenwe didn't have stock for the
orders we had just collected orsomething like that.
(12:31):
There was the business managerside and I was like, oh, I feel
so awful because this 90 daybusiness magic group they still
got to see my inner workings ofhow I approach business and
there was a lot in depth.
But I was like I just feel likecrap.
And because I felt like crapabout this failure, which is a
common pattern, I was like maybeI'll just keep trying harder to
(12:53):
overcompensate.
So it was like I'd go under andthen I would overcompensate and
I'm like still not fixing it.
And I wanted to talk about itbecause it's recent and it
sucked and it stung.
And I even had one person reportme to the Better Business
Bureau because she was like thisis not good.
And I was like you know what?
(13:14):
I'm going to own it this timeand face it as early as I can.
Now that I realize this isfailing, I'm going to take it on
and be okay with it, cancelpayments, make refunds as
necessary.
But dang, I messed this up.
It was not the right offer, notthe right timing, and there's
something so beautiful aboutbeing able to have a recent one
to reference now for, yep, thatwas a failure, so yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
But you ended up pivoting.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
I pivoted once.
So that was another attempt tolike let's write the ship, let's
, let's do everything we can andI there is something to be said
, you might agree with me onthis.
There's something to be saidfor trying to write the ship.
Like, what can we do to try,you know, pivot and make a
course correct?
So I pivoted into a whole othertopic, which was um,
(14:05):
meditations, affirmations andhypnosis just the ones that you
listen to that are positivewhile you sleep or while you're
just like.
I just need a quick pick me upbecause I I'm obsessed with
those.
I love them huge fan.
I love nlp.
I study it pretty obsessivelyand I started there.
And then it still didn't work.
Nicole and I was like I am souncomfortable with every single
(14:29):
thing about this, I'muncomfortable with all decisions
.
I shed a lot of tears because Iwas like I feel like a failure
and I've got this email fromSarah that is reminding me that
I am a complete and totalfailure.
Okay, maybe it's time toactually say I gave it a good go
.
I attempted to upright the shipand nothing worked.
(14:50):
Those are the hardest momentswhen you put your all in and
something just doesn't.
It just isn't connecting orworking, but that's yeah.
That was the after the firstbig pivot.
I was like for some reason thisisn't working, or my heart's
not in it or something you know.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
Yes, and so what advice do you have for someone
who's facing that and who saysyou know what this is not
working Like?
Where, where do you, where doyou go from there?
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Ooh Okay.
So something I struggle withand others might feel the same
way is when I'm faced withimpending doom, like something
that just isn't working.
I struggle with feeling like,with honoring the step back
(15:39):
needed.
So I am a big believer that wecan step back and analyze the
situation, but we actually haveto create a little distance for
a few days or a week.
You know what I mean Like fullystep back.
I'm going to take a break, I'mgoing to pause and it needs to
be communicated.
I am going to reevaluate somethings because this is not
(15:59):
flowing how I wanted it to.
I'll let you guys know what Icome up with in a week.
So stepping back can be a reallyhelpful thing.
That's also helped me a lot inrelationships.
So if I'm in a conversationwith, like a kid or with Paul
and it's not that we're likescreaming or throwing things,
but like if we're at an impasseI'll say, hey, I don't think
(16:21):
we're going to get on the samepage today.
Are you cool if we, you know,bring this up tomorrow or the
day after, after we get somegood sleep?
You know like let's go have aweekend sleep and then let's
talk about this.
So the step back is huge.
And then being like, okay,let's get radically aware of why
didn't this work?
How can I prevent that fromhappening?
Is this a sinking ship?
(16:51):
That's inevitable?
Or is there just a few holes weneed to plug through stepping
back, so that step back iseverything?
And then kind of having thatradical self-awareness of, oh,
this doesn't work because I amwired this way and this is not
something I want to change atthis time, that's a huge thing.
Have you found things like thatto be helpful?
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Yes, it makes me think of the book the Untethered
Soul and learning to take astep back.
I don't know if you were theone that I know you recommended
Happy Pocket Full of Money, soI'm in the process of reading
that that one's like.
So I'm in the process ofreading that that one's like.
(17:48):
I don't know what I wasexpecting, but it was not.
It was like quantum physicsfrom chapter one.
You know what I mean, but it'snot happening to you.
It's it's happening to you, butlike you're watching it and so
you, you create that separation.
So things are easier, it's lessemotional, it's it's more you
can look at the whole board,versus being stuck in that
moment um, because then you getstuck in fight or flight.
Freeze, yeah you know, and andthen you're not helpful to
yourself or to anyone.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
It's so true, and especially for those of us who
who maybe I mean, I know I'mwired this way where it's like I
have to be doing to prove myworth um gotta stay busy, you
gotta prove you're working hard,you've gotta um like some of
the things that were instilledin me about hard work were are
(18:30):
really helpful in many ways, andin some ways, like that is a
limit, it's a limiting belieflike I have to work hard always
to be making good money.
I have to be doing to prove myvalue.
And the truth is we allprobably need to spend like at
least one day a week steppingback and being the observer, and
(18:51):
I know I need that.
So the in-betweens are just asimportant as the doing, if not
more important to make sure thatwhen I'm doing, it's the right
things in the right way or thebest way.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Yes, getting comfortable with being instead
of doing and just being.
That's been a big lesson for me, really.
Yes, yeah, yeah, especiallywith our hustle culture, right,
like we're always, like you said, just going, going, going.
You have to be productive, butrest is productive.
(19:26):
You have to be productive, butrest is productive.
(19:49):
You know, taking time off, likeyou said, if you're so busy and
there's so much going on aroundyou?
Speaker 2 (19:51):
how are you going to connect with the source?
How you know, like, how are yougoing to hear back from you?
Know, those, those inklingslike the you know, like our
intuition, like we can't hear itif we're too busy doing a bunch
of other stuff?
I do think that's where, um,having like mentors or
consultants or even just likesounding boards is so big.
People who can, you know, stepback as the observer when you're
like in intense moments, andthey can say, hey, I'm just
going to be honest with you,that's not even what you want to
(20:11):
be doing right now.
Like this is so not a focus?
I think that you can table thisfor later.
You don't have to abandon it,but you can come back to it.
Or hey, no, I saw your facelight up when you were talking
about this.
I think you're letting fearstop you.
Like those voices in our lives.
They can step in as those stopthat gap observers.
(20:33):
When we're in busy seasons andespecially for those of us who
have, like kids, you know it'salways a busy- season, you don't
know what a Tuesday is going tobring.
So for me that's Paul.
It's been mentors and then,like I, get to go into companies
as a consultant and they're tooclose to the force.
They're staring at each reel'sperformance and I'm like no,
look at the bigger picture, lookat what this is all creating.
(20:57):
Don't focus on the one thatdidn't perform.
Look at this.
So that's where those soundingboards can be so big.
And yeah, Paul's my number one.
I don't pay him enough for that, but he's great.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
And I think that speaks to the importance of
community.
Right, like we can't, we can'tdo this alone, like no matter
what type of business you haveor no matter what type of life
you have, even if you're not inbusiness, we, we need community,
we need mentors.
Yeah, we need community.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
We need mentors.
Yeah, so I need them, that'sfor sure.
Every every day or week, I'mtalking to someone who we act
for sounding boards for eachother.
Is this a good idea?
Have you seen this?
Do you think this would help me?
You know?
And that saves so much time.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Yes, it's like masterminding right, and
something that I talk about inmy book is books.
Is, you know, getting with yourmentors and reading their books
and watching their free videos?
You know like you provide a lotof free resources.
I wanted to ask you about that,you know, because I feel like
you want to make thingsaccessible to everyone and you
(22:08):
talk in your content about howyou are one of those freebie
people.
That's how you got started,that's how I got started, so can
you, can you talk to me alittle bit about how that plays
a role in your business and inhow you help others?
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Yes, so you know how some people are money hardwired.
They love making money.
They love, they love money.
They love the process of it.
I've never been naturallyhardwired that way.
I don't know how much is in mybank account at any given time.
I didn't when I was poor either.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I just didn't care.
I was like I'll just see whathappens.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
I don't spend much money and I think that actually
would surprise most people.
I'm very thrifty, very cheap.
If my kids are like can we getcanes?
I'm like, I don't like friedchicken, but I can make killer
fried chicken at home.
I'm the make it at home mom, andI think sometimes my kids wish
I weren't that way.
But money like to me theperfect society wouldn't have
(23:07):
money, even though I know thatthat's not real, like it doesn't
really exist in this day andage.
So for me, money doesn'tmotivate me as much as seeing
people create change.
And so an interesting thing isthat I know that to run a
business hire a team, leadpeople, provide things at the
(23:29):
level I want to it all does costmoney.
So I'm like cool, I'm going torelease as much as I can for
free, and some things will beorganized and compiled to make
sure that this, basically thisinstitution, can keep running
itself without us running intothe ground or anything.
So free things, I will say,have transformed my life and the
(23:50):
lives of millions of otherpeople.
I am a huge believer in free.
It's how I decide who I'm goingto like and trust.
It's how I find what I'm goingto fall in love with.
Cheap is amazing too.
I know a lot of people in myspace they will just talk down
about, like freebie seekers andlow ticket offers, but when I
(24:12):
was a single mom on welfare, Ineeded a pair of dress shoes for
a wedding and I found a pair.
I won't say what brand it is,but I found a pair of designer
shoes for 99 cents and they werebeat up, but they worked really
well.
I still have them in my closet,I still wear them, I still love
them, and now I know that thatdesigner creates lasting,
(24:34):
quality clothes.
So if I ever needed a fancydress and I was at a store that
had that designer, I might belike huh, okay, this one will
last the test of time.
So there's something about freeand cheap that can actually
bring in premium buyers in a waythat most people wouldn't
expect, and it's a great way to,you know, make yourself stand
(24:56):
out from the sea of people whoare peddling stuff they've never
even done so yeah love that andthat is such a great analogy.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
I love thrift shopping, I love the treasure
hunts.
Um, I found so many good things, you know, and then they're
very inexpensive.
You're like, oh yes, theydidn't know what this was.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Yes, that's what we always think well there are
certain stores we'll walk intoand we're like oh, they know,
they know and all of us are highand you're like no, I was
looking for the weird hidden gemwith like a you know chipped
enamel on the front or somethingyou know, yes, yeah, yes, yes,
and I'm also very like my.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
my grandma was a seamstress, and so you know like
I learned to say okay, okay,hold on.
Hold on, hold on.
I got another one for you.
My birthday is April 1st, noway you're an april fool too yes
, yes, yes, yes.
I was like oh my god, I have toremember to tell her that I'm
(25:56):
so glad you remembered um.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Okay, so do you love your april 1st birthday?
Sorry, I know this is a tangent, but do you love your april 1st
birthday?
Speaker 1 (26:04):
no, everyone birthday .
No, everyone loves to playpranks.
Nobody believed I was beingborn, yep.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
I love it, but everyone always thinks I'm
joking when I say it's mybirthday and I'm like well then,
I've been joking for 36 yearsbecause it is still my birthday,
so I love it though.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Oh, we're twins, I know right, Different years, but
we're twins.
And then both of our grandmaswere seamstresses, so so, yeah,
so we were talking about thethrift store and how, like you
know, if I find something andlike there's a button missing,
I'm like I can fix it.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
Yeah, I know, I'm currently working on my button
jar.
You know how my grandma both mygrandmas had button jars and
they just collected buttons.
Yes, so I'm working on mybutton jar.
Both, both of my daughtersactually mostly my older
daughter, dakota she's beensewing a lot of stuffed animals
by hand.
We have a scrap bin where allof our old clothes with cool
(26:59):
fabrics.
We put them there so that wenever have to buy fabric for
test projects or even full-onprojects.
It makes me sound like I'm likecheap, but I'm like, yeah, I
literally grew up scrappy.
So, um, yeah, she was like, doyou have a button jar?
And I was like that's what I'mmissing.
I don't have a button jar yet.
So, oh, I love that, you knowall of that.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
Yes, I'm thinking about my button jar.
It's like in this littleplastic, and then it has the
little ladle and the whole thingis full and you know you can
see through it.
It's like in this little plastic, and then it has the little
ladle and the whole thing isfull and you know you could see
through it, it's so cool I love,and I'm pretty sure, um, I
collected them from differentgrandmas and stuff, you know,
and I put them all together, um,so, yeah, there you go, that's,
you can look for buttons in thethrift store anyway, um, you
(27:45):
are so much fun, um, all right,one.
One last thing that I wanted totalk to you about, one of the
big foundational things of mybook, like the, the secret sauce
I discovered, right, like whatI found at the at the bottom of
the well, or, so to speak, umgratitude.
Can you talk to me a little bitabout what role gratitude has
(28:05):
played in your journey?
It?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
needs to be like breathing.
It needs to be like breathing.
Okay, so, as I built my entirebusiness one of the hard parts
for me is I'm a very verbalprocessor.
Whether I'm by myself andtalking into like talk to text,
or I'm journaling, I got to getwords out.
(28:27):
And the first time that I builtmy business, I realized almost
for and I say the first timebecause there wasn't, there was
a clear before and after in thefirst, like the come up, the
first big come up, I realizedthat not everybody else was like
living and breathing thebusiness the same way I was, and
(28:49):
so it made me feel very like,not isolated.
But I kept a lot to myself,which just basically meant that
I was limiting the expressionsof gratitude throughout the day,
and so it wasn't as enjoyable.
I wasn't grateful for oh wow,we sold this program today.
That's so fun.
(29:09):
Oh wow, our new student justgot this from this.
That's incredible.
I really missed out on justsavoring the moments and I felt
like maybe if I try harder orbuild this bigger or make it
more impressive, more peoplewill care as much as I do, and
that was not what flipped theswitch at all.
It was actually gratitude thathad to come first.
(29:31):
So three years ago I had like apublic breakdown.
It's fully documented, it'severywhere.
Zero out of 10 recommend.
But it was wild because when Icame back I had to kind of
basically rebuild everything,because overnight I pretty much
well, not overnight, it was likethree months.
I had to kind of basicallyrebuild everything because
overnight I pretty much well,not overnight, it was like three
months.
I tanked my reputation andpeople were like now we're
(29:53):
nervous about her.
And so I came back and therewere a lot of crickets in a lot
of places that used to have alot of chatter and I was just
like this is uncomfortable.
And so I decided to start withgratitude as much as possible.
And over the last three yearsit has gotten to the point where
I wake up and I go and this isso cheesy because I always said
(30:16):
I wouldn't be this person I'm sograteful for this cozy bed and
then but I'm also grateful thatI get to have some coffee, let's
wake up, and then Paul and Imake the bed and that's our act
of like gratitude for the bed,the linens, everything I used to
like.
Be annoyed with the people whoare always like gratitude,
gratitude, gratitude and truthbe told, it has changed
(30:38):
everything.
I swear my face like it hasbeen lighting up differently
lately, because I'm experiencinggratitude in the small just as
much as the big, if not more,that's such a big deal.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Um, the soul of money .
Um, it was recommended to meand there is a quote where it
was talking about abundance,like how, how, like, yeah, it
shows up.
And so, like, when you firstwake up in the morning, if
you're like, oh, I didn't getenough sleep again, yes, that's
(31:11):
a symptom of lack.
Speaker 2 (31:13):
Yes, and then right then you're vibrating at the
resonance of lack.
So it sounds weird, but youhave to focus on here's what we
do have.
There's an abundance of.
Oh.
We've got heat.
In the winter it might not beas hot as I want, but it is here
.
I'm grateful for that.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
Yeah, ac in the summer.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
So grateful this summer especially.
But yeah, and I know a lot oftimes people will say like but
how can you be grateful when youdon't feel like you have
anything and what?
I would challenge people to do?
So I'm bipolar type one, whichmeans that there's stuff that
happens internally that peopledon't always see.
(31:57):
So there are struggles,abundant everywhere.
Ok, you know what?
I'm abundant?
That I have a brain that canhandle multiple thoughts at once
, cool, ok.
So there's abundance.
I'm grateful that my beddoesn't have to be in my kitchen
.
I'm grateful for that, so youcan look for what is true.
(32:18):
And just by doing that, youwill attract to be like oh,
things aren't going how I want.
Now I'm like got to stop, goback, go back to gratitude.
What is going well?
(32:41):
Let's focus there.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
Yes, and it's to help you reframe right, because
we're looking at the same thing,we're just looking at it a
little bit differently.
It makes me think of theglasses.
Remember from National Treasurethat they had to change all the
lenses and they were looking atthe same map, but depending on
which lens.
Now you got to go back andwatch it with your kids.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
Okay, I haven't watched it because I don't like
Nicolas Cage.
Now I need to see that scenebecause I'm going to use that.
I'm going to say Nicole Tuxburytaught me this a really cool
framework.
It comes from National Treasure.
No, but like I love that.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
Yeah, but that's what it is right and we have a whole
section of our brain that ishelpful to us in practicing
gratitude, like that's wheregratitude comes from, and so we
have to practice it.
We, you know it's just like youcan't do a hundred pushups
right now If you've never done apushup in your life.
Like it's going to be reallyhard to try to be like a hundred
(33:39):
things I'm grateful for.
But as we go practicing, littleby little, we get stronger and
it gets easier and so I love it.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Something that always helps me too with that, because
sometimes I can get really intoa state of like victimhood and
feel really sorry for myself.
I get very negative if I'm notcareful, and so I sometimes have
to go to like the basics andI'll go.
Okay, I can't do a single pushup, but I have arms.
I'm grateful I have arms.
(34:08):
Okay, what's this?
Well, somewhere in therethere's a muscle.
So I have muscles and mymuscles can grow.
Okay, I'm grateful for that.
And then I'm like that's all Igot.
Today I'm going to try onepushup and like that helps me
when I'm like in that like supernegative place and be like
let's go back to the most basicthings.
Would life be harder withoutarms?
(34:29):
Yes, I have friends.
Without arms it is there aremore challenges.
So today I'm grateful for theseextensions and that actually
does do some reframing for me.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
Yes, and like gratitude, like you said it's
the studies show that it caneven improve your health like it
can help you feel less pain.
So like these are documentedthings and so, like you're
saying, just feeling thatgratitude for those body parts
is bringing awareness, you'rebringing more blood, like it's
just a cascade of differentthings that happen just by you
(35:01):
taking a moment to get into yourbody, because, especially us,
we're neurodivergent.
Sometimes it sounds reallyweird if you're not, but like
you feel like life is happeningsomewhere else and you're over
here and so doing things likethat, like I'm grateful for my
hands, I'm grateful for my arms,I'm grateful that my back hurts
, because at least I can stillfeel it, I can still walk um,
(35:22):
that helps us reframe and thatbrings attention to those body
parts and then it helps, ithelps with other things.
So I love that.
I think that's amazing, um, andI love your examples of how you
apply it, like in your, in yourreal life.
Like as soon as you wake upyeah, it's not like I didn't get
enough sleep it's like oh, mygod, this bed is so comfy.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
I love it, yeah, and you know, and you're intentional
about creating that yeah, andthen I also try to like anchor
things in with specific things.
One of my go-toos is like a.
So it's a, it's a celebrationlike a.
So that's what I do always Likewhen I'm backstage before I'm
(36:02):
about to speak at events, Ialways go.
This will be so great.
So I'm on like a ton of videosfor people's events where I'm
backstage going and it's like ahype up and you can feel the
energy in your body.
So I'll do that when I'm likeokay, I got five hours of sleep
last night.
Okay, I was already tiredbefore I went to bed.
(36:24):
Okay, I'm alive.
I woke up, I get another chance, I'm grateful I might be able
to sleep tonight.
Okay, and then it like tricksyour, your mind into thinking
okay, the body's saying we'rehappy, let's let, maybe let's
follow.
That can help me quite a bit.
So those little weird ritualsthat create positive energy.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
Yeah, just like I've heard.
Like standing in superhero poseyeah, that's super helpful
before you go into a meeting orsomething.
You imagine yourself as asuperhero, as a king or a queen,
um, and then that helps youbring that energy into, into
whatever it is that you're doing.
So I love that.
That is so cool and I love howyou share like real life
examples right, because it's onething for somebody to be like
(37:07):
stand like this, but you're likeno, when I'm on backstage, like
I probably look so wild.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
But yeah, these are such good questions, my gosh
thank you.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Thank you so much, yeah, um so, as we're wrapping
up here, um, you mentioned thatyou have a gift for the audience
.
I'd love it if you could tellus a little bit about that.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
For sure.
Okay, so is it cool if Iactually just bring it up here
now, because I do have somethingthat I think would be really
helpful?
Are you cool with that, Nicole?
Yes, of course.
So I have.
This is going to be reallyhelpful because I can sit here
and talk about how gratitude andlike pause we could talk all
(37:54):
day, by the way you're so great.
We can talk all day aboutgratitude and like the power of
positive thinking.
But when someone's in like thatplace where they're like I'm so
burnt out and overwhelmed Ican't even care at this point.
It's really hard to get out ofthat and I know that because I
experience it.
Point it's really hard to getout of that and I know that
(38:15):
because I experience it.
So when you're in that burntout right, that burnt out place,
you almost need someone to say,hey, here's a lifeline to just
pull you a little closer toshore so you stand a chance to
swim to shore.
So I actually put together anentire guide for the exact steps
that I do.
This isn't available anywhereelse um, it's not on my website
for this one.
So it's the burnout guide.
(38:35):
I don't remember the title, Ihaven't released it, but it's
this burnout guide that helpsyou when you're overwhelmed,
there's too much to do andyou're in a negative slump and
nothing seems to be working.
So I would love to gift that toyour audience.
I'll make sure you get all thedetails, and then anything else
that you need support with youcan go to r Petersoncom.
I'll use an a D in my last nameand there's just tons of free
(38:57):
stuff on my site.
It's more free than even paid.
You'll see that very quickly Ilove that.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
I appreciate that so much and your resources are
amazing.
Like it's not like you'regetting like a little like
pretend thing and be like ha ha,you have to go to the next
level to get the results.
Yeah, no, no.
Like you actually providereally good value up front, and
so I just want to let you knowthat I do appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
I love creating them because I create them based on
what I want to see and whatwould make me say this person's
the real deal.
I like to see action andresults happen, even from
freebies, so people can get thatfree resource.
And even if you just latch onto like one of the concepts in
there and you're like thishelped make getting out of bed
today 10% easier Cool, that wasa win in my book.
Speaker 1 (39:48):
All of the links that she mentioned are going to be
available down in the show notes, and usually we wrap up with
your biggest tip.
So, like, what is the biggest,best aha moment that your
clients get?
Like, what's that tip that yougive them?
Speaker 2 (40:03):
Yes, okay.
So when my clients and I areworking together, every single
one of them experiences andexpresses doubt in different
ways.
So some it's through control,wanting to know every single
number at all times, and some itlooks like emotional, like
(40:27):
brain dumps and vents and thingslike that.
And so something I just want toremind everybody is that we all
express fear or doubt or thosethings that are stopping us from
taking action differently.
So don't try to suppress that,but instead express it.
Get out there.
Get it out like journal it.
(40:48):
Go punch a boxing bag If that'syour style it's clearly not
mine, um but do the thing thathelps you, like get past the
doubt, the fear, the, the Idon't know if I can do this or I
don't see the path like expressit so that you can move on,
because it's been acknowledgedby your brain.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
I love that taking action, just creating something,
creating something, and youknow what it made me think of?
I was watching a nurse.
She is an OBGYN nurse.
She helps women who are givingbirth, and she noticed a
phenomenon when they're becauseyou know, like there's different
stages to giving birth and theneach stage has different stages
(41:32):
.
I don't know if you saw thisvideo, but the moment that you
go from like you know, like thecontractions happening, to like
it's time to push, right,there's a moment where the mom
says something to the effect ofI can't do this, yes, this is
hard, I need to go to thebathroom.
Can't do this, yes, this is toohard, I need to go to the
(41:56):
bathroom.
And that is how the nurses knowthat it's time to push, that
their body is ready to push iswhen they think they can't.
That's the moment where thingsare about to get real, and so is
that cool, right?
And so just to back end yourencouragement if you feel like,
oh, my god, I can't do this,this is the moment where
something is about to be birthed.
That's beautiful in your lifeand you just got to keep moving.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
I love that, okay, I want to add to that because, oh
my gosh, nicole, we couldliterally talk all day, I'm not
joking.
So when I was about to givebirth to, dominic was one of the
most um, one of the most like Iwas.
I was the most vocal with whatI wanted to say and I made all
the doctors and nurses stop andI made them look at me and I
(42:39):
needed to know that they werelistening and I said I just need
you to acknowledge for me whatI'm about to do.
Physically doesn't make sense.
This seems impossible.
How is a baby supposed to comeout of me?
Can you please, real fast, justacknowledge for me that this is
impossible by what I know.
And they're like, yes, and Iwas like, ok, let's go.
(43:00):
And then it was like, ok,that's fine, as long as you can
tell me this is impossible andit's still somehow going to
happen.
Same thing is true in business.
Yes, yes.
Speaker 1 (43:10):
Oh, that's beautiful.
And so that moment of failurewhere it feels like you just
can't anymore, um, that's, youknow, that's where magic.
So, since we're talking aboutfailure, I just wanted to offer
some encouragement.
We've all been there, um, andthere's there's beauty on the
(43:30):
other side.
Um, I haven't talked about thisa lot, but I was Baker acted
when I was younger as well, andso I had to go into the hospital
, and so I just want to.
You know, I feel safe becauseyou talk about it all the time,
but there is hope.
There is hope after depression,there is hope after
hopelessness, and so, yeah, Ijust wanted to.
(43:51):
I just thought I should mentionthat.
I thought it was important,since this episode is really
powerful, like this is somepowerful stuff we talked about
today.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
There is definitely like life after challenges,
failures, public failures,there's life after a psych ward.
I want to put that out therebecause more people cord.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
I want to put that out there because more people
hide that than I think werealize you know, yeah, so I was
there and, and yeah, so I justwanted to let you know that I
know, I know, I know.
All right, so, before we dosign off, the only thing we
haven't talked about is how dowe follow you on social media.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
Oh, easiest place is pretty much on every single
platform.
I'm at the mrs peterson, or ifyou search for rachel peterson,
with all e's and a d in my lastname, it'll come up pretty fast
awesome, perfect.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
Thank you so much.
This has been just absolutelyamazing, rachel, you are an
absolute gem.
You're just an angel.
Speaker 2 (44:50):
I just so appreciate you so much for taking the time
to hang out with me today thiswas easy breezy like this didn't
feel like, oh, it's anappearance, so thank you for
having me thank you and thankyou guys for joining us.
Speaker 1 (45:04):
This has been amazing and we'll catch you guys next
time on the next episode ofovercome yourself, the podcast
bye.
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