August 12, 2025 • 26 mins
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome back to the next episode of
Overcome Yourself, the podcast.
I'm debuting a new shirt today,if you're going to see this on
video, so I'm very excited aboutthat and to be doing it with
Doris and Doris is my next guesthas an incredible story.
She was.
Were you a gifted kid, doris?
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I was a gifted kid.
I was in a gifted program.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
So she, like me, is, was a gifted kid.
I was in a gifted program, soshe, like me, is a recovering
gifted kid.
Um, you know, we did reallygood in school and then and then
we got out of school and thenstuff happened and then life hit
us in the face and it wasn'tlike gifted classes anymore.
So, doris, please take it away.
Tell us a little bit about whoyou are, your story and now who
you help out.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Oh, awesome, okay, so I'll start with who I am.
I love to introduce myself intwo different ways, because I
think sometimes people getcaught up in their titles and so
they don't realize that they'retelling people what they do
instead of who they are.
So who I am?
I'm a mom to four.
I have the unique parentingjourney of having a.
I have a 20 year old, but Ialso have a senior in high
(01:11):
school, a sixth grader and akindergartner, so I have
children at all the differentstages of life all at the same
time.
So I think that's pretty cool.
So I'm a mom to four.
I'm a wife to my collegesweetheart.
We've been together now about22 years, and so you hear a
little bit about that in my book, raising Justice.
I am a daughter and I'm thesister, and I am, most
(01:36):
importantly, a friend.
I think that that's one of mybest qualities that I've never
met a stranger and I kind ofjust befriend anyone.
So that's a little bit aboutwho I am and what I do is.
I'm a leadership coach andmanagement consultant, and so
I'm a full-time entrepreneur now, and I love the fact that I get
to partner with not onlyexecutives and leaders but also
(01:58):
corporations to help them buildhigh accountability, high morale
environments and really helpthem through some of their
people problems.
So if they're dealing withconflict in the business maybe
there's gossip going on orperhaps their team doesn't know
how to hold others accountable,or they're struggling with the
morale of the business or theywant to grow their emotional
(02:20):
intelligence, I'm someone thatthey can partner with to bring
in, and I don't not only teachthe team, maybe in a workshop,
but I do group coaching or teamcoaching or I partner one-on-one
with executives and directorsand middle managers and help be
a thought partner to them.
And so that's a little bitabout who I am and what I do
(02:40):
currently.
A little bit about my journey.
I guess I became a full-timeentrepreneur over the last two
years, so I've been in thisbusiness full-time two years.
I've had the business for aboutfive years.
I worked in corporate Americafor the last 20 years.
I try not to refer to it like Idid time, but sometimes
(03:00):
corporate America feels like youdid your time.
I did about 20 years incorporate America before
deciding that I want to supportcorporate America.
I don't necessarily want to bein the infrastructure of it, and
so that's why I grow mybusiness, where I get to support
not only small but medium andlarge size companies.
But I'm not necessarily insidethe infrastructure anymore, and
(03:25):
so that's a little bit about me.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I love that.
No, that is just fantastic.
That is awesome.
So tell us about your journey.
Tell us a little bit about yourjourney.
You mentioned your book, solike let's dive into that and
tell me all about how it came tobe.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
All right.
So Raising Justice literallystarted as journal entries and
so when my daughter was younger,so a lot of people were like,
okay, raising Justice, like whatis it?
The title is twofold.
Number one my child name isactually Justice, and so it's
quite literal.
This book talks about my journeyinto motherhood.
(04:04):
I often tell people thatmotherhood was my first
leadership position, becausesometimes I think we think we
don't think of moms asnecessarily leaders, especially
as it translates into theworkplace.
And I'm here to tell you well,I became a mom at 19 and it
definitely was Well, actually at20, I was pregnant at 19.
But it was definitely my firstleadership position and a lot of
(04:26):
things I learned in motherhood.
I was able to transfer into theworkforce.
But about justice, or how thebook came about, I started
journaling really some of thefunny things that she would do
as a child and some of the waysthat she would challenge me as a
mom.
So the book really tells thestory.
(04:47):
It starts with me as a19-year-old, high-performing,
high-achieving, on fullscholarship, first person in the
family to graduate high schooland go to college.
And then I find myself pregnantmy sophomore year of college
and I contemplate whether I'mgoing to continue this pregnancy
(05:07):
.
So first chapter begins infront of what I thought was an
abortion clinic, and I love totell people the beginning of the
story and the ending of thestory.
And then the story ends with mesitting exactly 19 years later,
me sitting at the graduation ofthe child that I thought that I
wouldn't have, and at the sameage that I was when I was
(05:29):
contemplating having her.
And so I raised Justice to nowbecome a high performing
teenager who graduates collegeat the age of 19.
And so you really get to hearthis full circle moment of.
I am someone who you know, Igrew up in the inner city, miami
, florida.
If you're familiar with thefirst 48 show a couple episodes
(05:50):
in the neighborhood I grew up inand you know I get the dream of
going off to college on fullscholarship and then I find
myself in this predicament and Itell pretty much the stories of
me enduring and being resilient, but also how I learned how to
parent in a way that I wasn'tparented, and so I think this
(06:12):
book is really important to notonly the testament of resiliency
or overcoming, but thatmother-daughter relationship
thing that kind of happens andwe talk about how do you build
those close relationships andconnections and so you get to
hear those different type ofstrategies through Justice and
I's journey.
(06:32):
And again, my favorite part ofthe book is at the end to know
that this child who maybe didn'tcome into the best of
circumstances, or me who didn'tcome from the best of
circumstances, not only makes itto a director level position of
a major corporation, a nationalbrand, but also I do this while
(06:53):
building my family, whilehaving a great relationship with
my daughter, and then whileseeing her graduate college at
the age that I was contemplatingeven having her.
So it's a pretty cool story.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
That's an amazing story, um, coming around this
little circle.
Around that age I got pregnant,but I miscarried um, and so my
book actually starts where withthat day when I got that news.
Um, that's like the firstchapter and what happened since
then.
So so I that's.
That's an amazing parallelright there.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Yeah, that's the same parallel.
It starts literally the day Ifind out, so that's so so cool.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I like I resonated with thatand then, and then, when you
mentioned about Miami, I'm, likeyou know, sometimes I've told
people, like you know, likegrand theft auto, there's like a
Liberty city.
I live right near there, youknow, I can see Liberty City
from my house.
Yeah, so, yeah, so, like I knowall about Miami and all the
(07:57):
different parts, because it's sovaried, like there's so much
variety in Miami, there's somany different pockets and it's
so different.
Now you know, like now we'vegot historic Overtown, um, and
they're building out CoconutGrove, and you know, and, and
things are just changing.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Oh my god the way, the way Overtown is right now.
It's just still amazes me,because I grew up in the
different parts of Miami as well.
So I lived in Brownsville, Ilived in Little Haiti, I lived
by Alapata, I lived in Overtown,like.
So I lived in all thosedifferent intricacies of miami,
and so it's interesting when Igo back to see how much it
developed.
And so I lived in brownsvillebut I went to school in
(08:36):
corgables, so, yeah, and then atone point I lived like right by
northwestern, and so I wouldcatch the bus down to the metro
rail, then catch the metro railand then walk to Coral Gables
High every day to be in the IBprogram.
But my home school was MiamiNorthwestern and so, yeah, you
(08:56):
know, being from Miami, youunderstand the intricacies of
what that life is and what thatexperience is, and so, yeah,
that's that's where I grew upyeah, I went to southwest.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
So you went to northwest and I went to
southwest so yeah, um, butthat's really cool.
Yeah, and and and, like thefood down there, though, like
now, like you go down there, thefood, oh my god, it's unmatched
, it's unmatched.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
So you find all these littlepockets and these little
restaurants, um, and it's justdifferent than anything else you
(09:29):
can find in Miami, oh God.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
I was telling someone the other day I'm saying look,
you can go on Caya Ocho and likeliterally you can find whatever
you want, like from Venezuela.
They just think Spanish food.
I'm like no, no, no, no, it'snot just Spanish food, you got a
Venezuelan.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
You got.
You got Colombian, that there'sMexican, like that's all
different.
The Cuban, like that's theCuban with the corner windows.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Yeah.
So I would say that's probablywhat I miss the most about
living in Miami is the food yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Yeah, like it's.
You know, that's one of thebest things, just the different.
I love it.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's awesome, okay, sothat was like a nice little trip
down memory lane, so thank youfor that.
So talk to me a little bitabout that journey of overcoming
yourself.
You were, you were a gifted kid, you were straight A student.
You go to college and then youend up pregnant.
(10:22):
That's probably not what youwere expecting to happen.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
No, it wasn't a part of the plan.
It definitely wasn't a part ofthe plan and I think it grew me
up in a lot of ways.
And I think one of the thingsthere's about two things that in
your journey to being, I guess,like a full, mature and
authentic adult, you kind of gothrough and I think I think I
went through it a little bitearly because of that situation
(10:46):
but one of them is getting overwhat people think of you when
you find yourself pregnant, youknow, at 19.
And again, I probably did moremental damage than myself than
anybody else did, because I wasso ashamed, so embarrassed.
I felt like I had disappointedmy family and I carried that
with me.
But the first lesson that I hadto learn was how to get over
(11:08):
myself Right, and sometimes ittakes people a lot longer.
So I got over.
I had that lesson at 1920, like, well, get over what other
people think of you, right.
And and what that then does isit releases you from people
pleasing.
And so I meet people to thisday.
They're in their thirties andtheir forties and they still
haven't overcame people pleasingand it's a struggle for them.
(11:31):
There's things that they aregoing through because they
haven't understood how to stopthat behavior.
And so one of the things that Iwas able to learn very quickly
and I'm so grateful that I wasable to get those lessons early
on because it allowed me to soarin my career I was already over
what people think and I wasalready over people pleasing
(11:52):
through that experience, and sothat really, really helped me as
I made my journey intocorporate America, because you
have to find a good, goodbalance in order to survive
there.
So, yeah, and I went throughanother iteration later on in my
career, when I exited corporateAmerica, where I had to
(12:13):
overcome myself again and it washow do you define success?
So most of my life, I definedit by the standard that was put
before me.
If you had a college degree ifyou were, you know, you know
married you know like just thedifferent things.
If you had a college degree ifyou were, you know, you know
married you know like just thedifferent things If you bought a
home, if you have a certainamount of money in the bank, and
(12:33):
so those were all the thingsthat I used to define success.
And as I matured and growed inyou know, my title was really
important to me at one point inmy life.
And now I got the you know, I'msenior director of leadership
development and all this bigstuff and the company car and
the black car, and it's just allthese different things, and I
(12:53):
felt like, oh man, this issuccess.
And then COVID happens.
I find myself hospitalized forseven days, I find myself on
oxygen treatment for threemonths, and in the stillness of
that experience and in thequietness of that experience and
really thinking about man youalmost left here, have you
(13:16):
really done the things that youwanted to do in this life?
You know, are you reallysuccessful?
And it's like, yeah, I'msuccessful in the eyes of a lot
of people.
I got the title, I got asix-figure salary, I own a home,
I have all these things.
But internally I wasn'tsuccessful because I had started
writing my first book at 15,and I started 10 books and had
(13:38):
never completed one.
I never completed one.
I knew that I was supposed tobe coaching other people and
helping them to start theirbusinesses or refine and scale
their businesses, but I wasn'tout there doing it.
And so what success looked likefor me began to shift, and then
(13:59):
I had to again remind myselfit's not about what everybody
else thinks.
It's not about what everybodyelse thinks success is.
It's about what I think successis.
And so, yes, I've checked allthose boxes and I'm about to
give it all up to go after whatI think success is.
And right now, success is notonly wealth, but it's
flexibility and it's freedom.
(14:19):
And so I walked away from allof it, and some days I'm still
feeling like a crazy person.
But I walked away from all ofit to do success on my terms.
And I have the flexibility nowto get my kid off the bus stop
where my other three kids theyall only knew afterschool
programs or daycares until six.
(14:41):
But my last child gets to seeme every day at three o'clock
when they get off the bus.
Like that's success to me now.
So I think that's the otherpart of overcoming yourself.
How do you define success?
Is it through your lens or isit through the lens of what the
world has told you?
And I think for a long time inmy life it was through the lens
that the world had told me, andnow it's through my own lens,
(15:05):
and I'm grateful for that.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
I love that.
I love that so much.
I wrote an article about peoplepleasing in Authority Magazine
recently and yeah, thanks.
And then one of the things Italked about was I heard a quote
when someone said it to me thatlike, if you're on a fence and
you're leaning on going towardsthe left, everyone on the right
(15:28):
is going to criticize you, andthen if you're leaning towards
going to the right, everyone onthe left is going to criticize
you.
But if you stay on the fenceand you don't go either way,
both sides are going to call youlazy and indecisive, so you
can't win.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, yeah yeah, so I love that.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I love that and, speaking of which, as we're
wrapping up here, one of thethings that I talked about when
we are trying to overcomepeople-pleasing, we're setting
boundaries.
We're doing all these things ispracticing gratitude so that we
can feel grateful for ourselves, we can value ourselves, and
(16:03):
that building ourself-confidence is going to make
it easier to set thoseboundaries, because saying yes
just doesn't make sense anymore.
You're just like no, I don'twant to do that.
So can you talk to me a littlebit about the role that
gratitude has played in thisjourney for you?
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Wow, great question.
And I think gratitude has beenimportant at every stage of the
journey, because I have tostrike a balance.
I'm naturally an ambitiousperson and I think gratitude
keeps me humble.
Gratitude allows me to live alittle bit in the moment.
When you're a person that Ifocus a lot in the future.
(16:44):
I'm always planning, I'm alwayslooking at what's the next
thing to do, because part of myjob for so long was to goal set
for my team.
So it's like we got to makethis quarter and then we make
the quarter.
Well, the next quarter is here.
We got to make this quarter too.
And so when you live in a spacewhere you're always having to
(17:04):
achieve a goal or meet a metric,you really stay rooted and
always looking forward.
But I think gratitude is thattool that keeps you present,
because it makes you step backand look at what you have now.
And so I think gratitude hasbeen instrumental in finding
balance, as I've been on thisjourney.
(17:25):
So, although I, you know, I wasworking in college and wanting
that degree, gratitude allowedme to appreciate every single
semester that I passed, you know, until I got to that degree.
And then, once I got that job,gratitude allowed me to be
grateful for the position that Iwas in, even though I was going
for the next position.
(17:45):
So I think gratitude isimportant in finding that
balance and really being able tolock in happiness as you are
going through this journey oflife.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
I love that.
I love that, and I think it'simportant how you, how you
mention it, cause in my book Italk about it as well.
It's not about being gratefuland that's it.
I'm done.
I'm grateful for what I have.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
It's not about complacency.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah, exactly it's about.
It's about finding that joy,learning to live in joy,
enjoying the moment, but we'restill working towards that next
thing.
I'm enjoying what I have now,but I'm still working towards
that other thing.
So I think that's reallyimportant.
And sometimes I talk aboutgratitude and people are like no
, but it's not, you can't justbe complacent.
I'm not talking about beingcomplacent.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
No, that's different.
That's different, not at all.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
I'm just grateful for where I am right now, because I
can't like, if I want a milliondollars and a million dollars
over there, but I'm not beinggrateful for what I have now.
Well, how are you going to feelgrateful for when you get to a
million?
Because it's exactly what yousaid you get to a million,
you're like great.
I made a million, you're likegreat.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
I made a million.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
Now it's five million , now it's a hundred million and
then and then you're alwaysjust moving that goalpost, so
that's such a big deal yeah, no,it's so important to balance
you.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
You gotta manage the gratitude with the ambition or
literally you will always bedissatisfied, always you know,
yes, that is such a big key.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Um, yeah, because what's the point of having all
that stuff if you're notsatisfied, like we are, you're
miserable, like you're just.
Oh, I don't like these people,I don't like this house, I don't
like I got all this stuff, butI'd rather be doing this.
Well, why didn't you do that?
Like exactly so yeah, gratitude.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
Yeah, gratitude helps you to to manage that.
If you can find that, that thatlevel of great gratefulness and
appreciation for the thingsthat you have while you're on
the journey or while you're onyour way to the ultimate goal,
then you really have greatbalance as you're moving along.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
I love that, I love it, love it.
Now, how can we stay in touchwith you, doris?
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Oh man, All right, so I have a couple of different
ways you can stay in touch withme.
So the easiest way is mywebsite.
It's my name,dorisjacksonchaziercom and
that's my author page.
I also have a website, ChazierCoaching Consult, and that page
is pretty much.
If you want my businessservices, I have my team on
there and really, if you'relooking for your team to be
(20:11):
inspired, if you're looking fora guest speaker to come in and
maybe do a team buildingexercise or help you with a
people problem on your job,Shazier Coaching Console is the
best.
You can still get me atdorisjacksonshaziercom.
You'll see more of personalaspects and about my books on
that website.
My name Social media I'm allover it.
(20:32):
So hit me up on LinkedIn.
Please connect at Doris JacksonShazier, but also Shazier
Coaching Consult on Facebook orInstagram will connect you
directly to me.
My name is also for TikTok,Doris Jackson Shazier, but yeah,
I'm on Instagram, Facebook,TikTok and LinkedIn, so
definitely lots of differentways to connect.
(20:52):
I also have a YouTube page, sodefinitely you can throw my name
in Shazia Coaching andConsulting and I'm on YouTube as
well.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Awesome, and all of those links, as you mentioned,
will be down in the show notesso you don't have to worry about
trying to figure out where theyare.
They're down there.
And you mentioned that you hada special gift that you're
working on for the audience.
You want to tell us a littlebit about it?
Speaker 2 (21:16):
Yes, so what you'll be able to see is when you go to
my website, you will have toenter your email address, but
you will receive an ebook, andso the book is about how do you
lead and love Gen Z?
It's the hot topic right now,at least in the corporate space,
is our Generation Z is cominginto the workforce, and they're
coming in with just a differentpersonality to work with, and so
(21:40):
people are always like, oh,they're this way, they're
entitled, they don't get it.
Well, here's the thing Not onlydo I have had a chance to
manage Gen Z, but I live withGen Z, and so I created a small
little e-book with some tips onhow do you lead and love them.
They're different, but reallythere is a way to extract the
(22:02):
best out of them, and it's inhow you lead and love them.
Going to give my take on thebest things to do, how to listen
to them properly, how to coachthem in the best way, and so I
wanted to share that.
So email address and then youget your free link to check out
how to lead and love Gen Z.
Also, if you're on my website,raising Justice is there.
(22:26):
It's also available on Amazon,and then my second and third
book will drop at the same timetime.
And then my second and thirdbook will drop at the same time.
It's called Pieces to Peace howI Overcame COVID and Corporate,
and I talk to leaders about howdo you navigate, thrive and
heal from toxic workenvironments.
So it's a pretty good bookthat's going to be dropping as
well.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
That is amazing and, yes, the cool thing about Gen Z.
The problem with Gen Z, that,from the articles that I've read
, is that they do not put upwith the old tactics.
They don't.
It's not going to work at allthey are going to have to level
up, because they do have veryhigh expectations.
But you know, it's a good thing, right?
Because they're like I'm notI'm not doing all these things
(23:09):
that my grandparents did and youuse them Like that's not going
to happen with me, and so I lovethem for that, yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:17):
Again, I admire Gen Z .
It's now about teaching themthe balance, Because also, the
thing that I find with Gen Z issometimes they think everything
is toxic and I'm like, no,that's just work Like that's not
toxic.
That's what having a boss isLike how do like?
Speaker 1 (23:31):
no, that's just work like that's not toxic.
Speaker 2 (23:33):
That's what having a boss is like expectations for
them, and so, yeah, I'll talk alittle bit about that in the
ebook on how to build betterrelationships with gen z, so
that you can get the best out ofthem but, I think they're going
to be.
They're one of the coolestgenerations out there as far as
their awareness and theirability to stand up for
themselves.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Yes, yes yes, so I love that, I love that so much
and I think that's just such afascinating topic, so that is
amazing.
So last tip, big tip, what is abig takeaway Like?
What's that tip that you giveyour clients?
Or the advice that gives themthe biggest aha moment?
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Ooh, I feel like I give a lot of good advice.
No, I'm just kidding.
Here's what just came top ofmind for me today.
I love to remind people to staycurious and suspend judgment.
I think sometimes, whether it'sin the workplace, whether it's
in friendship, whether it's inrelationships and families,
sometimes we're not curiousenough, meaning we don't ask
(24:36):
enough questions.
We lead with assumption, likewe tell the whole story in our
head, right?
So we don't ask enoughquestions and then we rush to
judge that, we rush to put alabel on it or assign something
to it.
Stay curious, just askquestions, seek to understand,
but then also suspend judgment.
Let it play out, see where theperson is coming from with that.
(24:58):
Don't feel the need to kind ofput a button on something, and
so I try and practice that.
I ask a lot of questions.
I like to tell people I have ahigh level of intellectual
curiosity.
It just means I'm nosy.
I found a fancy way to say it.
I have a lot of questions, so Istay curious and then I suspend
judgment.
I wait before I assign judgmentto a person you know.
(25:21):
I want to hear the full story,I want to know where you're
coming from with that, and Istay in a place of understanding
.
So stay curious and suspendjudgment.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
I love like that trend we listen and we don't
judge right.
Speaker 1 (25:38):
So that's exactly that's what I thought of when
you said that.
So, yes, so I think that's suchgreat advice listen, don't
judge, ask questions.
And it's so true, because mostlike, even even like movies and
stuff like what is the problem,the crux of the problem?
99% of the time it'scommunication issues.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Yeah, it's the miscommunication they assume you
were doing that because youwere trying to da-da-da-da.
Nobody said they were doingthat Like you said all of that.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
And fights too, like in our families, you know a kid
is like I'm doing this.
And and fights too, like in ourfamilies.
You know a kid is like I'mdoing this.
And you assume, oh my god,you're gonna go with no parents
who said that, like they'reperfect to me, you know.
So yeah, so I love that, I lovethat.
So stay curious, guys.
Um, this has been an amazingepisode.
Thank you so much for beinghere with us, doris, and we will
see you guys next time on thenext episode of Overcome
Yourself, the podcast bye, thankyou.
Hello and welcome back to the next episode of
Overcome Yourself, the podcast.
I'm debuting a new shirt today,if you're going to see this on
video, so I'm very excited aboutthat and to be doing it with
Doris and Doris is my next guesthas an incredible story.
She was.
Were you a gifted kid, doris?
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I was a gifted kid.
I was in a gifted program.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
So she, like me, is, was a gifted kid.
I was in a gifted program, soshe, like me, is a recovering
gifted kid.
Um, you know, we did reallygood in school and then and then
we got out of school and thenstuff happened and then life hit
us in the face and it wasn'tlike gifted classes anymore.
So, doris, please take it away.
Tell us a little bit about whoyou are, your story and now who
you help out.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Oh, awesome, okay, so I'll start with who I am.
I love to introduce myself intwo different ways, because I
think sometimes people getcaught up in their titles and so
they don't realize that they'retelling people what they do
instead of who they are.
So who I am?
I'm a mom to four.
I have the unique parentingjourney of having a.
I have a 20 year old, but Ialso have a senior in high
(01:11):
school, a sixth grader and akindergartner, so I have
children at all the differentstages of life all at the same
time.
So I think that's pretty cool.
So I'm a mom to four.
I'm a wife to my collegesweetheart.
We've been together now about22 years, and so you hear a
little bit about that in my book, raising Justice.
I am a daughter and I'm thesister, and I am, most
(01:36):
importantly, a friend.
I think that that's one of mybest qualities that I've never
met a stranger and I kind ofjust befriend anyone.
So that's a little bit aboutwho I am and what I do is.
I'm a leadership coach andmanagement consultant, and so
I'm a full-time entrepreneur now, and I love the fact that I get
to partner with not onlyexecutives and leaders but also
(01:58):
corporations to help them buildhigh accountability, high morale
environments and really helpthem through some of their
people problems.
So if they're dealing withconflict in the business maybe
there's gossip going on orperhaps their team doesn't know
how to hold others accountable,or they're struggling with the
morale of the business or theywant to grow their emotional
(02:20):
intelligence, I'm someone thatthey can partner with to bring
in, and I don't not only teachthe team, maybe in a workshop,
but I do group coaching or teamcoaching or I partner one-on-one
with executives and directorsand middle managers and help be
a thought partner to them.
And so that's a little bitabout who I am and what I do
(02:40):
currently.
A little bit about my journey.
I guess I became a full-timeentrepreneur over the last two
years, so I've been in thisbusiness full-time two years.
I've had the business for aboutfive years.
I worked in corporate Americafor the last 20 years.
I try not to refer to it like Idid time, but sometimes
(03:00):
corporate America feels like youdid your time.
I did about 20 years incorporate America before
deciding that I want to supportcorporate America.
I don't necessarily want to bein the infrastructure of it, and
so that's why I grow mybusiness, where I get to support
not only small but medium andlarge size companies.
But I'm not necessarily insidethe infrastructure anymore, and
(03:25):
so that's a little bit about me.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I love that.
No, that is just fantastic.
That is awesome.
So tell us about your journey.
Tell us a little bit about yourjourney.
You mentioned your book, solike let's dive into that and
tell me all about how it came tobe.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
All right.
So Raising Justice literallystarted as journal entries and
so when my daughter was younger,so a lot of people were like,
okay, raising Justice, like whatis it?
The title is twofold.
Number one my child name isactually Justice, and so it's
quite literal.
This book talks about my journeyinto motherhood.
(04:04):
I often tell people thatmotherhood was my first
leadership position, becausesometimes I think we think we
don't think of moms asnecessarily leaders, especially
as it translates into theworkplace.
And I'm here to tell you well,I became a mom at 19 and it
definitely was Well, actually at20, I was pregnant at 19.
But it was definitely my firstleadership position and a lot of
(04:26):
things I learned in motherhood.
I was able to transfer into theworkforce.
But about justice, or how thebook came about, I started
journaling really some of thefunny things that she would do
as a child and some of the waysthat she would challenge me as a
mom.
So the book really tells thestory.
(04:47):
It starts with me as a19-year-old, high-performing,
high-achieving, on fullscholarship, first person in the
family to graduate high schooland go to college.
And then I find myself pregnantmy sophomore year of college
and I contemplate whether I'mgoing to continue this pregnancy
(05:07):
.
So first chapter begins infront of what I thought was an
abortion clinic, and I love totell people the beginning of the
story and the ending of thestory.
And then the story ends with mesitting exactly 19 years later,
me sitting at the graduation ofthe child that I thought that I
wouldn't have, and at the sameage that I was when I was
(05:29):
contemplating having her.
And so I raised Justice to nowbecome a high performing
teenager who graduates collegeat the age of 19.
And so you really get to hearthis full circle moment of.
I am someone who you know, Igrew up in the inner city, miami
, florida.
If you're familiar with thefirst 48 show a couple episodes
(05:50):
in the neighborhood I grew up inand you know I get the dream of
going off to college on fullscholarship and then I find
myself in this predicament and Itell pretty much the stories of
me enduring and being resilient, but also how I learned how to
parent in a way that I wasn'tparented, and so I think this
(06:12):
book is really important to notonly the testament of resiliency
or overcoming, but thatmother-daughter relationship
thing that kind of happens andwe talk about how do you build
those close relationships andconnections and so you get to
hear those different type ofstrategies through Justice and
I's journey.
(06:32):
And again, my favorite part ofthe book is at the end to know
that this child who maybe didn'tcome into the best of
circumstances, or me who didn'tcome from the best of
circumstances, not only makes itto a director level position of
a major corporation, a nationalbrand, but also I do this while
(06:53):
building my family, whilehaving a great relationship with
my daughter, and then whileseeing her graduate college at
the age that I was contemplatingeven having her.
So it's a pretty cool story.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
That's an amazing story, um, coming around this
little circle.
Around that age I got pregnant,but I miscarried um, and so my
book actually starts where withthat day when I got that news.
Um, that's like the firstchapter and what happened since
then.
So so I that's.
That's an amazing parallelright there.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Yeah, that's the same parallel.
It starts literally the day Ifind out, so that's so so cool.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I like I resonated with thatand then, and then, when you
mentioned about Miami, I'm, likeyou know, sometimes I've told
people, like you know, likegrand theft auto, there's like a
Liberty city.
I live right near there, youknow, I can see Liberty City
from my house.
Yeah, so, yeah, so, like I knowall about Miami and all the
(07:57):
different parts, because it's sovaried, like there's so much
variety in Miami, there's somany different pockets and it's
so different.
Now you know, like now we'vegot historic Overtown, um, and
they're building out CoconutGrove, and you know, and, and
things are just changing.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Oh my god the way, the way Overtown is right now.
It's just still amazes me,because I grew up in the
different parts of Miami as well.
So I lived in Brownsville, Ilived in Little Haiti, I lived
by Alapata, I lived in Overtown,like.
So I lived in all thosedifferent intricacies of miami,
and so it's interesting when Igo back to see how much it
developed.
And so I lived in brownsvillebut I went to school in
(08:36):
corgables, so, yeah, and then atone point I lived like right by
northwestern, and so I wouldcatch the bus down to the metro
rail, then catch the metro railand then walk to Coral Gables
High every day to be in the IBprogram.
But my home school was MiamiNorthwestern and so, yeah, you
(08:56):
know, being from Miami, youunderstand the intricacies of
what that life is and what thatexperience is, and so, yeah,
that's that's where I grew upyeah, I went to southwest.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
So you went to northwest and I went to
southwest so yeah, um, butthat's really cool.
Yeah, and and and, like thefood down there, though, like
now, like you go down there, thefood, oh my god, it's unmatched
, it's unmatched.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
So you find all these littlepockets and these little
restaurants, um, and it's justdifferent than anything else you
(09:29):
can find in Miami, oh God.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
I was telling someone the other day I'm saying look,
you can go on Caya Ocho and likeliterally you can find whatever
you want, like from Venezuela.
They just think Spanish food.
I'm like no, no, no, no, it'snot just Spanish food, you got a
Venezuelan.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
You got.
You got Colombian, that there'sMexican, like that's all
different.
The Cuban, like that's theCuban with the corner windows.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Yeah.
So I would say that's probablywhat I miss the most about
living in Miami is the food yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Yeah, like it's.
You know, that's one of thebest things, just the different.
I love it.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's awesome, okay, sothat was like a nice little trip
down memory lane, so thank youfor that.
So talk to me a little bitabout that journey of overcoming
yourself.
You were, you were a gifted kid, you were straight A student.
You go to college and then youend up pregnant.
(10:22):
That's probably not what youwere expecting to happen.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
No, it wasn't a part of the plan.
It definitely wasn't a part ofthe plan and I think it grew me
up in a lot of ways.
And I think one of the thingsthere's about two things that in
your journey to being, I guess,like a full, mature and
authentic adult, you kind of gothrough and I think I think I
went through it a little bitearly because of that situation
(10:46):
but one of them is getting overwhat people think of you when
you find yourself pregnant, youknow, at 19.
And again, I probably did moremental damage than myself than
anybody else did, because I wasso ashamed, so embarrassed.
I felt like I had disappointedmy family and I carried that
with me.
But the first lesson that I hadto learn was how to get over
(11:08):
myself Right, and sometimes ittakes people a lot longer.
So I got over.
I had that lesson at 1920, like, well, get over what other
people think of you, right.
And and what that then does isit releases you from people
pleasing.
And so I meet people to thisday.
They're in their thirties andtheir forties and they still
haven't overcame people pleasingand it's a struggle for them.
(11:31):
There's things that they aregoing through because they
haven't understood how to stopthat behavior.
And so one of the things that Iwas able to learn very quickly
and I'm so grateful that I wasable to get those lessons early
on because it allowed me to soarin my career I was already over
what people think and I wasalready over people pleasing
(11:52):
through that experience, and sothat really, really helped me as
I made my journey intocorporate America, because you
have to find a good, goodbalance in order to survive
there.
So, yeah, and I went throughanother iteration later on in my
career, when I exited corporateAmerica, where I had to
(12:13):
overcome myself again and it washow do you define success?
So most of my life, I definedit by the standard that was put
before me.
If you had a college degree ifyou were, you know, you know
married you know like just thedifferent things.
If you had a college degree ifyou were, you know, you know
married you know like just thedifferent things If you bought a
home, if you have a certainamount of money in the bank, and
(12:33):
so those were all the thingsthat I used to define success.
And as I matured and growed inyou know, my title was really
important to me at one point inmy life.
And now I got the you know, I'msenior director of leadership
development and all this bigstuff and the company car and
the black car, and it's just allthese different things, and I
(12:53):
felt like, oh man, this issuccess.
And then COVID happens.
I find myself hospitalized forseven days, I find myself on
oxygen treatment for threemonths, and in the stillness of
that experience and in thequietness of that experience and
really thinking about man youalmost left here, have you
(13:16):
really done the things that youwanted to do in this life?
You know, are you reallysuccessful?
And it's like, yeah, I'msuccessful in the eyes of a lot
of people.
I got the title, I got asix-figure salary, I own a home,
I have all these things.
But internally I wasn'tsuccessful because I had started
writing my first book at 15,and I started 10 books and had
(13:38):
never completed one.
I never completed one.
I knew that I was supposed tobe coaching other people and
helping them to start theirbusinesses or refine and scale
their businesses, but I wasn'tout there doing it.
And so what success looked likefor me began to shift, and then
(13:59):
I had to again remind myselfit's not about what everybody
else thinks.
It's not about what everybodyelse thinks success is.
It's about what I think successis.
And so, yes, I've checked allthose boxes and I'm about to
give it all up to go after whatI think success is.
And right now, success is notonly wealth, but it's
flexibility and it's freedom.
(14:19):
And so I walked away from allof it, and some days I'm still
feeling like a crazy person.
But I walked away from all ofit to do success on my terms.
And I have the flexibility nowto get my kid off the bus stop
where my other three kids theyall only knew afterschool
programs or daycares until six.
(14:41):
But my last child gets to seeme every day at three o'clock
when they get off the bus.
Like that's success to me now.
So I think that's the otherpart of overcoming yourself.
How do you define success?
Is it through your lens or isit through the lens of what the
world has told you?
And I think for a long time inmy life it was through the lens
that the world had told me, andnow it's through my own lens,
(15:05):
and I'm grateful for that.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
I love that.
I love that so much.
I wrote an article about peoplepleasing in Authority Magazine
recently and yeah, thanks.
And then one of the things Italked about was I heard a quote
when someone said it to me thatlike, if you're on a fence and
you're leaning on going towardsthe left, everyone on the right
(15:28):
is going to criticize you, andthen if you're leaning towards
going to the right, everyone onthe left is going to criticize
you.
But if you stay on the fenceand you don't go either way,
both sides are going to call youlazy and indecisive, so you
can't win.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, yeah yeah, so I love that.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I love that and, speaking of which, as we're
wrapping up here, one of thethings that I talked about when
we are trying to overcomepeople-pleasing, we're setting
boundaries.
We're doing all these things ispracticing gratitude so that we
can feel grateful for ourselves, we can value ourselves, and
(16:03):
that building ourself-confidence is going to make
it easier to set thoseboundaries, because saying yes
just doesn't make sense anymore.
You're just like no, I don'twant to do that.
So can you talk to me a littlebit about the role that
gratitude has played in thisjourney for you?
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Wow, great question.
And I think gratitude has beenimportant at every stage of the
journey, because I have tostrike a balance.
I'm naturally an ambitiousperson and I think gratitude
keeps me humble.
Gratitude allows me to live alittle bit in the moment.
When you're a person that Ifocus a lot in the future.
(16:44):
I'm always planning, I'm alwayslooking at what's the next
thing to do, because part of myjob for so long was to goal set
for my team.
So it's like we got to makethis quarter and then we make
the quarter.
Well, the next quarter is here.
We got to make this quarter too.
And so when you live in a spacewhere you're always having to
(17:04):
achieve a goal or meet a metric,you really stay rooted and
always looking forward.
But I think gratitude is thattool that keeps you present,
because it makes you step backand look at what you have now.
And so I think gratitude hasbeen instrumental in finding
balance, as I've been on thisjourney.
(17:25):
So, although I, you know, I wasworking in college and wanting
that degree, gratitude allowedme to appreciate every single
semester that I passed, you know, until I got to that degree.
And then, once I got that job,gratitude allowed me to be
grateful for the position that Iwas in, even though I was going
for the next position.
(17:45):
So I think gratitude isimportant in finding that
balance and really being able tolock in happiness as you are
going through this journey oflife.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
I love that.
I love that, and I think it'simportant how you, how you
mention it, cause in my book Italk about it as well.
It's not about being gratefuland that's it.
I'm done.
I'm grateful for what I have.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
It's not about complacency.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah, exactly it's about.
It's about finding that joy,learning to live in joy,
enjoying the moment, but we'restill working towards that next
thing.
I'm enjoying what I have now,but I'm still working towards
that other thing.
So I think that's reallyimportant.
And sometimes I talk aboutgratitude and people are like no
, but it's not, you can't justbe complacent.
I'm not talking about beingcomplacent.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
No, that's different.
That's different, not at all.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
I'm just grateful for where I am right now, because I
can't like, if I want a milliondollars and a million dollars
over there, but I'm not beinggrateful for what I have now.
Well, how are you going to feelgrateful for when you get to a
million?
Because it's exactly what yousaid you get to a million,
you're like great.
I made a million, you're likegreat.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
I made a million.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
Now it's five million , now it's a hundred million and
then and then you're alwaysjust moving that goalpost, so
that's such a big deal yeah, no,it's so important to balance
you.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
You gotta manage the gratitude with the ambition or
literally you will always bedissatisfied, always you know,
yes, that is such a big key.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Um, yeah, because what's the point of having all
that stuff if you're notsatisfied, like we are, you're
miserable, like you're just.
Oh, I don't like these people,I don't like this house, I don't
like I got all this stuff, butI'd rather be doing this.
Well, why didn't you do that?
Like exactly so yeah, gratitude.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
Yeah, gratitude helps you to to manage that.
If you can find that, that thatlevel of great gratefulness and
appreciation for the thingsthat you have while you're on
the journey or while you're onyour way to the ultimate goal,
then you really have greatbalance as you're moving along.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
I love that, I love it, love it.
Now, how can we stay in touchwith you, doris?
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Oh man, All right, so I have a couple of different
ways you can stay in touch withme.
So the easiest way is mywebsite.
It's my name,dorisjacksonchaziercom and
that's my author page.
I also have a website, ChazierCoaching Consult, and that page
is pretty much.
If you want my businessservices, I have my team on
there and really, if you'relooking for your team to be
(20:11):
inspired, if you're looking fora guest speaker to come in and
maybe do a team buildingexercise or help you with a
people problem on your job,Shazier Coaching Console is the
best.
You can still get me atdorisjacksonshaziercom.
You'll see more of personalaspects and about my books on
that website.
My name Social media I'm allover it.
(20:32):
So hit me up on LinkedIn.
Please connect at Doris JacksonShazier, but also Shazier
Coaching Consult on Facebook orInstagram will connect you
directly to me.
My name is also for TikTok,Doris Jackson Shazier, but yeah,
I'm on Instagram, Facebook,TikTok and LinkedIn, so
definitely lots of differentways to connect.
(20:52):
I also have a YouTube page, sodefinitely you can throw my name
in Shazia Coaching andConsulting and I'm on YouTube as
well.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Awesome, and all of those links, as you mentioned,
will be down in the show notesso you don't have to worry about
trying to figure out where theyare.
They're down there.
And you mentioned that you hada special gift that you're
working on for the audience.
You want to tell us a littlebit about it?
Speaker 2 (21:16):
Yes, so what you'll be able to see is when you go to
my website, you will have toenter your email address, but
you will receive an ebook, andso the book is about how do you
lead and love Gen Z?
It's the hot topic right now,at least in the corporate space,
is our Generation Z is cominginto the workforce, and they're
coming in with just a differentpersonality to work with, and so
(21:40):
people are always like, oh,they're this way, they're
entitled, they don't get it.
Well, here's the thing Not onlydo I have had a chance to
manage Gen Z, but I live withGen Z, and so I created a small
little e-book with some tips onhow do you lead and love them.
They're different, but reallythere is a way to extract the
(22:02):
best out of them, and it's inhow you lead and love them.
Going to give my take on thebest things to do, how to listen
to them properly, how to coachthem in the best way, and so I
wanted to share that.
So email address and then youget your free link to check out
how to lead and love Gen Z.
Also, if you're on my website,raising Justice is there.
(22:26):
It's also available on Amazon,and then my second and third
book will drop at the same timetime.
And then my second and thirdbook will drop at the same time.
It's called Pieces to Peace howI Overcame COVID and Corporate,
and I talk to leaders about howdo you navigate, thrive and
heal from toxic workenvironments.
So it's a pretty good bookthat's going to be dropping as
well.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
That is amazing and, yes, the cool thing about Gen Z.
The problem with Gen Z, that,from the articles that I've read
, is that they do not put upwith the old tactics.
They don't.
It's not going to work at allthey are going to have to level
up, because they do have veryhigh expectations.
But you know, it's a good thing, right?
Because they're like I'm notI'm not doing all these things
(23:09):
that my grandparents did and youuse them Like that's not going
to happen with me, and so I lovethem for that, yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:17):
Again, I admire Gen Z .
It's now about teaching themthe balance, Because also, the
thing that I find with Gen Z issometimes they think everything
is toxic and I'm like, no,that's just work Like that's not
toxic.
That's what having a boss isLike how do like?
Speaker 1 (23:31):
no, that's just work like that's not toxic.
Speaker 2 (23:33):
That's what having a boss is like expectations for
them, and so, yeah, I'll talk alittle bit about that in the
ebook on how to build betterrelationships with gen z, so
that you can get the best out ofthem but, I think they're going
to be.
They're one of the coolestgenerations out there as far as
their awareness and theirability to stand up for
themselves.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Yes, yes yes, so I love that, I love that so much
and I think that's just such afascinating topic, so that is
amazing.
So last tip, big tip, what is abig takeaway Like?
What's that tip that you giveyour clients?
Or the advice that gives themthe biggest aha moment?
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Ooh, I feel like I give a lot of good advice.
No, I'm just kidding.
Here's what just came top ofmind for me today.
I love to remind people to staycurious and suspend judgment.
I think sometimes, whether it'sin the workplace, whether it's
in friendship, whether it's inrelationships and families,
sometimes we're not curiousenough, meaning we don't ask
(24:36):
enough questions.
We lead with assumption, likewe tell the whole story in our
head, right?
So we don't ask enoughquestions and then we rush to
judge that, we rush to put alabel on it or assign something
to it.
Stay curious, just askquestions, seek to understand,
but then also suspend judgment.
Let it play out, see where theperson is coming from with that.
(24:58):
Don't feel the need to kind ofput a button on something, and
so I try and practice that.
I ask a lot of questions.
I like to tell people I have ahigh level of intellectual
curiosity.
It just means I'm nosy.
I found a fancy way to say it.
I have a lot of questions, so Istay curious and then I suspend
judgment.
I wait before I assign judgmentto a person you know.
(25:21):
I want to hear the full story,I want to know where you're
coming from with that, and Istay in a place of understanding
.
So stay curious and suspendjudgment.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
I love like that trend we listen and we don't
judge right.
Speaker 1 (25:38):
So that's exactly that's what I thought of when
you said that.
So, yes, so I think that's suchgreat advice listen, don't
judge, ask questions.
And it's so true, because mostlike, even even like movies and
stuff like what is the problem,the crux of the problem?
99% of the time it'scommunication issues.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Yeah, it's the miscommunication they assume you
were doing that because youwere trying to da-da-da-da.
Nobody said they were doingthat Like you said all of that.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
And fights too, like in our families, you know a kid
is like I'm doing this.
And and fights too, like in ourfamilies.
You know a kid is like I'mdoing this.
And you assume, oh my god,you're gonna go with no parents
who said that, like they'reperfect to me, you know.
So yeah, so I love that, I lovethat.
So stay curious, guys.
Um, this has been an amazingepisode.
Thank you so much for beinghere with us, doris, and we will
see you guys next time on thenext episode of Overcome
Yourself, the podcast bye, thankyou.
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