Parenting Decoded

Parenting Decoded

This podcast will help all parents with kids of all ages to learn how to decode the mysteries and challenges of being a parent in today's challenging times. We will concentrate on practical parenting approaches that you as a parent can use right away! There are tips and tricks as well as plenty of real life stories to help you see that you can make a difference in your family's life in simple yet noticeable ways. In order for your kids to change, you need to change first! The ripple effect is real and lasting. Enjoy the ride!... Show More

Episodes

February 8, 2021 23 min

26: Lying, Cheating, and Stealing

Many parents get very upset when they catch their children lying, stealing, or cheating. We all hate the feeling of betrayal, being lied to, or cheated. But we all lie for lots of reasons. Sometimes to cover up bad behaviours. Other times, we do it out of fear because we want to spare ourselves of punishment or avoid sanctions.

The same goes with our young ones. But one thing is certain, it’s often n...

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January 25, 2021 69 min

Tantrums continue to be a huge problem for parents.  Take a listen to this one hour Zoom seminar Mary did with a live audience with lots of practical advice on how to get a handle on tantrums in your home.  Learn about:

  • Why tantrums happen
  • What to do while the tantrum is happening
  • What to do AFTER the tantrum is over
  • How to avoid tantrums in the future
  • If you'd like to see the full video with slides go to the Parenting Decoded YouTu...

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    It’s very difficult as a parent to see our kids struggle either academically or socially.  For some of us we feel that our kid is the only one struggling and we have no idea where to turn to.  In this podcast I interview Lexie Burnes of NeuroPlay Academics for information about how and when you might look to get your child tested if you suspect something is not quite right. 

    I don't have a transcript yet but here's a link t...

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    December 4, 2020 20 min

    Holidays and gift giving can bring about so much stress to families who are sucked into the commercialism of our current situation.  In this podcast I want to give you all some hints about making gift giving a more heartfelt experience not only from you as the giver but also how to create an attitude of gratitude in our kids who are receiving those gifts.  I’ll also go over some ideas about how to handle sibling-to-sibling giving a...

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    November 19, 2020 19 min

    Kids are self-centered from the get-go, no doubt about it. We have to teach them to be grateful for all that they have, all that we give them.  But, how on earth do we do that when there's so much taking and so little giving going on around us? 
     
    First, I want to talk about entitlement – what it is and how it can grow out of control.  Then I’ll go over ideas on how to nurture an attitude of gratitude in your home.

    Beware of thes...

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    October 25, 2020 12 min

    Are you having trouble deciding whether to give in to your child's request to quit an activity?  Feeling like you might be raising a kid to be a quitter if you do ?  Take a listen to help you navigate this touchy subject!

    It seems that many parents have to cross the threshold of their child wanting to quit an activity.  It could be piano, basketball, soccer, violin, clarinet, tutoring, gymnastics, karate, whatever.  Sometimes it...

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    Our kids are smart.  They really know how to manipulate us into getting what they want – crying, whining, having tantrums, giving us the silent treatment.  It can be overwhelming.  In my last podcast we were learning how to use choices early to avoid power struggles from the get-go.  In this podcast we’re going to follow along that positive path by using another technique that is a companion to choices – setting boundaries and limi...

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    September 20, 2020 12 min

    Do you feel like you’re always battling your child?   You tell them to do something and you immediately get a “no” followed by whining and complaining or outright defiance?  A simple request that turns into a war is enough to send us over the edge sometimes.  

    In this podcast I talk about how to avoid power struggles by using a secret weapon -- Choices!  When used BEFORE battles start choices can be super effective. 

    If you kids are...

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    August 28, 2020 21 min

    I'm in California where parents are going through setting up and managing distanced learning in their homes since almost no schools are doing in-person learning. 

    This podcast will cover these areas:
    1 - Physical LEARNING AREA - how to organize it, get rid of distractions, provide a quiet area to focus, how and when to charge and test devices, and how to keep online safety in your home in mind

    2 - Establish clear routines - have ...

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    Many of us struggle with kids who whine, disobey and maybe even lie just to get their way.  We get so exasperated we want to explode and some of us certainly do explode. 

    In this podcast we’ll explore what happens in our families if we’re always operating in “crisis mode” then talk about ways to avoid ever getting into that mode by using Family Meetings to set boundaries and limits while communicating as a family what behaviors are...

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    In this podcast I’m going to cover issues relating to money with middle and high schoolers.  I will go over how to give money and how much, when to give money, and how to set up responsible money habits including how to use an ATM card, checking account, credit cards.  

    Money is a huge challenge for us all and at this stage your high schooler or middle schooler is at a huge crossroads with learning life skills.  Dealing with money i...

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    There are things to do at different ages and stages to help introduce money concepts to your kids so that by the time they graduate from high school they know about budgeting, credit cards and debt.   In this podcast, I’ll concentrate on what to do with younger kids, from toddler years up through elementary school using a simple spend-save-share method.

    Here's a transcript of the podcast:  TRANSCRIPT

    If you'd like to look at...

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    June 24, 2020 24 min

    I’ve had quite a few people asking me about chores – how to set them up, do you pay for them, how much do you pay, is allowance tied to chores, do I need chore charts with rewards, what do I do if my kid won’t do their chores.  In this podcast I want to address all those issues and more.  Chores let your kids develop life skills that, if taught well, will launch them into a good place in life.  I’ll start with the research behind w...

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    June 7, 2020 18 min

    In this episode I talk about the anger in our homes that gets directed at our children and some ideas for how we can get it under control.  First, I’ll talk about the impact anger has on our families then three ways to help mitigate anger in your home.  Lastly,  I’ll give you some fun and creative ideas about how to repair relationships with your kids.

    Here's a link to IdealistMom.com's article on the "Five Hair Ties...

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    May 22, 2020 24 min

    In Part 2, I cover my final 5 rules dealing with older kids when individual cell-phones, laptops and other electronics come in to play by about middle school.  

    Rule 9: Use Contracts
    Rule 10: Use Monitoring Software
    Rule 11: Talk About Online Safety
    Rule 12: Talk About Social Media and Gaming
    Rule 13: Talk about Porn

    Here are links to resources mentioned in the podcast:
     

    Helpful Websites for Keeping Up To Date
    www.CommonSenseMedia.org
    www.A...

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    April 28, 2020 20 min

    As most parents have noticed screens are a constant source of friction in our households that just never seems to end. 

    This podcast is the first of two parts; Part 1 targeting younger families and how to deal with what I call “family screens.” I go over ways we can set up screens in our family in such a way that there are limits with obedience, and if there’s not,  how to set up effective consequences. 

     Although the target audience...

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    Getting our kids to obey and comply is a daily struggle for so many.  Our classic styles of punishment just seem to be falling on deaf ears these days, doesn't it?  You can take stuff away or give time outs until your face turns blue and the next day your kids are right back on their bad behaviors.  Right?  

    In this episode we'll talk about why "punishments" are only temporarily effective.  Instead, using a combinati...

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    April 4, 2020 16 min

    In this episode we talk about what good might come from sibling rivalry but then some really practical techniques to use with your kids:

  • not taking sides
  • separating our kids
  • teaching them communication skills
  • setting aside Special Time 
  • I also talk about the very useful technique from Love and Logic Institute called Energy Drain and where to get more information on how to get your own energy back after your kids fight and argue.

    Here: T...

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    In this podcast we about how to handle sleep for our tweens and teens and why sleep seems to be so difficult for them biologically and socially.  I want to give you some ideas about how to react and manage both your expectations and theirs regarding this really essential part of their growing years. With the stresses in our environment today the impact of sleep on our mental health and immune system is super important for us to pay...

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    This podcast is for parents of toddlers through elementary school,  I have a separate podcast on dealing with issues of sleep and teens so please head there if you have older kids.  In this podcast we’ll go through some ideas for moving toward bed, getting ready for bed, turning out the lights and finally ideas for those of you who have kids who wake up at night. With that said, let’s get started.

    Here: TRANSCRIPT OF PODCAST

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