November 25, 2024 • 39 mins
Discover how love, laughter, and resilience can transform the caregiving experience in our latest episode, where we celebrate a remarkable milestone for our Parenting Up! community—being named one of the top three podcasts of the year by Hilarity for Charity! This recognition is a testament to the incredible dedication of our listeners and caregivers like Shina, who joins us to share her journey.
As we continue celebrating National Caregivers Month, we speak with Shina Hasan, the founder of Send a Prayer Now. Shina shares how she helped her mom with her grandmother after her sudden diagnosis of Dementia. Shina tells us funny stories about things only she could get her grandmother to do, her times with other family members, and how she was inspired to start her business.
As a bonus, Shina is offering 10% off at sendaprayernow.com! Enter code JSMILES10 at Checkout.
Subscribe, leave a comment, and a review on Apple Podcasts - it really helps!
Host: J Smiles
Producer: Mia Hall
Editor: Annelise Udoye
#Nationalcaregivingmonth
#caregivingjourney
#sendaprayer
#smallbusiness
#holidayshopping
#DementiaAwareness
#AlzheimersCare
#CaregiverSupport
#humorincaregiving
#comedypodcasts
#alzheimerscare
#EndAlz
"Alzheimer's is heavy but we ain't gotta be!"
IG: https://www.instagram.com/parentingup
FB: https://www.facebook.com/parentingup
YT: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDGFb1t2RC_m1yMnFJ2T4jw
Patreon: https://patreon.com/jsmilesstudios
TEXT 'PODCAST" to +1 404 737 1449 - to give J topic ideas, feedback, say hi!
Be sure to leave us a review!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Parenting Up family.
We did it, we did it and wereally means you.
Thank you so much.
Supporters, caregivers,everybody in the village.
We got an award.
Baby, we did it.
Mama, we made it.
Hilarity for Charity, hfc oneof the most preeminent
foundations, foundations in thewhole nation around caregiving
(00:27):
and awareness and brain healthand Alzheimer's made us, the
Parenting Up community, ourpodcast top three for the whole
year.
Yes, hfc boom.
That's Seth Rogen and LaurenMiller-R.
They decided that we wanted athree best for the whole year.
(00:50):
Couldn't have done it withouty'all.
That's from Zeddy.
I know she would have gavey'all a big old, wet, sloppy
kiss.
Parenting up caregivingadventures with comedian Smiles
is the intense journey ofunexpectedly being fully
responsible for my mama.
For over a decade I've beenchipping away at the unknown,
(01:13):
advocating for her and pushingAlzheimer's awareness on anyone
and anything with a heartbeat.
Spoiler alert this shit isheavy.
That's why I started doingcomedy.
So be ready for the jokes.
Caregiver newbies, ogs andvillage members just willing to
(01:34):
prop up a caregiver, you are inthe right place.
Hi, this is Zeddy.
I hope you enjoy my daughter'spodcast.
Is that okay?
Today's supporter shout outLaQuinda Thomas, 64, 17.
(02:02):
My great grandmother died at 101in 1979.
I was 13.
And she would always say Blackwomen are strong and we always
have been the mother of humanity.
And today our power is in ourvote because we are to always be
opposite of what is wrong withhumanity.
(02:25):
The knowledge of truth FromYouTube.
Listen, zeddy would agree withyour great grandmother.
If you want to be featured as asupporter, shout out a word.
Porter, shout out a row.
Then leave a comment and areview on Apple Podcasts,
(02:49):
youtube or Instagram.
Thank you.
Today's episode sending love andspreading smiles, showing
caregivers.
You care, parented Up,community.
You know how we do it.
We always find someone that isfun, fantastic and full of
(03:14):
information.
Why?
Because the universe lovescaregivers.
The universe knows we aregetting our ass kicked every
single minute of every day andtoday we have somebody that
feels like a sister, cousin.
You know, when you come acrosspeople like do I know you?
Did your mama or grandmama goto school with my mama or
(03:36):
grandmama?
Because the energy just hitslike so much.
So we were through filming andrecording for this month, but
the interview went so well thepre-episode interview I had to
call the team and say listen,okay, listen, we got to figure
this one out to score walls,this chicken cause, this one
(03:57):
just feels so right.
Yep, I think this is the firsttime I've ever done this.
Hell yeah.
So here we go, let's get it in.
Parenting Up Community.
Meet my girl, sheena.
What's up, sheena?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Hey Jay, hey Parenting Community, how y'all
doing today.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Girl, you are what I call a let's talk and let's do.
Yes, Right so you are part ofthe caregiving community, the
village community, so your momwas the primary caregiver for
your grandmother.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
And then out of that you've also created a product
that will help caregivers.
But before we I don't want toget ahead of ourselves, but I do
like tempting our audience sothey know what's ahead and have
a reason to lock in and stay onboard.
In the audio and in the video,let us know what your
(05:05):
grandmother's disease ailmentwas.
As I recall, she's no longer aphysical body on Earth.
Is that correct?
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Yeah, she's not here anymore.
She died in 2004.
She did, yeah, that was a toughyear.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
That's the same year my grandmother got her wings.
I don't know if I knew thatfrom our previous conversation.
Girl, I'm going to have to putsome stronger in my coffee.
Listen, look, I put a littleBaylis in here.
I'm going to have to go putsome 1738.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Not no more than 1738 .
Yes, this is the Remy Martin1738.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Look, everybody knows that is my go-to.
This is the way that I stay offthat cane.
Remy Martin 1738 helped me stayaway from cocaine.
People can talk about cognac ifthey want to, but it is better
than cocaine.
It is okay.
That much I can promise you.
So yeah, 2004 took me over theedge, sweetheart, with my
(06:15):
grandmother passing.
Let us know what was herdisease.
What was her disease?
And then, how did you all kindof determine that something was
going on with your grandmother,and what were the steps that you
took medically for hertreatment?
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Well, honestly, she didn't get diagnosed till my
grandma died at 91.
And that's the same year shegot it.
So it was like that summer shewas fine.
In March I had went there formy birthday.
She was her normal self, alwaysjoking when she sees you, baby,
you're getting so fat.
I'm like grandma.
I look the same I did when yousent me last year no, no them
(06:58):
hips.
I'm like okay, honey, if yousay so.
But anyhow, after you know, wejust had our good outings, as we
used to.
And then when I went back homeI would say that was August she
started deteriorating.
She just was in her same jollyself.
So, my mother, they took her tothe doctors and they were like
you know, it's the onset ofdementia she was going through
(07:20):
because she started forgettingshe would leave the stove on.
She became more argumentativeand it just wasn't a good
situation.
She ended up being hospitalizedfor a little while because her
blood pressure and all thatstuff was up, and then she came
home and that November shepassed away.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Wow, that was kind of fast.
It sounds like in the scheme oflife it wasn't a lot of years.
No kind of fast.
It sounds like in the scheme oflife that wasn't a it wasn't a
lot of years.
No, not at all.
When you said she wasargumentative, was that with
everybody or with specificfamily members?
Speaker 2 (07:59):
With my aunt that was there with her all the time.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
So my grandma would leave the stove on and my aunt
was like turn up now.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
You know, I like to cook.
So one night my aunt slept inthe basement.
So my grandmother had lockedthe basement door and I heard
this knocking on the door.
My grandmother's up because shegets up at the crack of the
dawn.
She's sitting in her chair likeshe never heard the door.
No one knocking at the door andshe's like ain't nobody there.
I was like grandma, there'sauntie down there.
(08:32):
You know, you don't lock her inthe basement.
I didn't lock her down there.
I didn't lock her down there.
But I said this is gave yourauntie that cared for her every
(08:56):
day the most pushback yes, shedid, and it was unfortunate
because she'd do anything Any ofus would do anything for her,
but she gave her the mostpushback.
And if say, for instance, theywere arguing about something and
I took my aunt's side, oh, youdon't love me, and no, I thought
(09:17):
she was in for me.
I'm like grandma really.
So then you know I getemotional because that's grandma
.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Right, where did your grandmother grow up?
Speaker 2 (09:27):
She where did she grow up?
She grew up in Virginia, but welived in New Jersey for years.
Ok, OK.
She's a northern girl, spicy.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely Did she.
When the doctors diagnosed her,did they just say dementia, or
did they say Alzheimer's orParkinson's?
Or they just said dementia.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
OK she did have diabetes, but they just said it
was just dementia, just theonset of dementia.
And when I say it was quickly,it was quickly because when I
said she was fine all her years,until just that that August was
where she started todeteriorate.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
So it was just a few months.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Yeah, just a few months.
And my grandfather had passedat 99, and she lived five years
after he passed, so that wasn'teven an issue, because you know,
sometimes that can triggerdifferent emotions, but no, she
was fine, absolutely yes,different emotions, but no, she
was fine, absolutely yes, that'sas um many in the parenting up
community know.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
That's medically.
You never know about any ofthis shit, but it appears that's
what happened with my mom.
Um, something might've beenlike, you know, something in the
milk wasn't clean, but it wasactually my dad's passing that
just ripped the top off the canand my mom, you know, within a
(10:53):
handful of months she was at twofull blown forms of dementia
and she couldn't care forherself in any significant way.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
When you're did your mom ever share anything with you
about the care of yourgrandmother?
Yeah, they hired someone tocome in to take care of her,
along with my aunt, and my momwas there because my mom lived
in New Jersey at the time andthen she came back home to stay
just during the duration of theperiod that she got the
(11:29):
diagnosis and she was just likeit was a lot, because you go
from seeing your mom jolly happyto I still know who you are,
but I'm not functioning to thecapacity that she normally would
.
She didn't want to take a bathand when I would come home I was
like, grandma, don't you wantto be pretty?
(11:51):
And she was like, yeah.
So mom was like you're the onlyone that can get to take a bath
.
I said, well, thank God.
I was like come on, grandma,let's get pretty, okay.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Hold up just a minute , sheena.
Your grandmother would bathewhen you gave her the.
I guess the Q word was pretty.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
She said listen here, Now don't nobody care about
being clean or smelling good,this dirt is fine.
However, I do want to remainpretty.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
The various things that a different, you know
individuals keep as a, as atrigger, or I wouldn't say a
trigger often is negative.
But so I want to think of amore positive as a reminder, a
reminder point or a word thatsays, yeah, OK, oh, yeah, that's
, that's a positive, that's OK,yeah, okay, oh yeah, that's a
positive, that's okay, yeah.
So with my mom is that redlipstick baby?
If I'm trying to get her to gosomewhere, I want her to do
(13:13):
something.
If I pull that thing out, shewants to put that on.
And now, all of a sudden, nowwe can comb the hair, now we can
brush the teeth.
Okay, now we can put some shoeson, because red lipsticks means
first things first.
We about to go somewhereoutside of the house and do
something, so grandma wanted tolook pretty.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
Yes, honey, cause my grandmother loved to dress,
she's going to have her bestsuits on, I mean, even around
the house.
You know, sometimes granniesare wearing their muumuu's back
the day, remember muumu?
Yes, yeah, honey, she's goingto know.
She got on her skirt and hershirt and her shoes and her
little knee highs.
I'm like okay, granny, you'regoing to be pretty all day long
(13:57):
and fly.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
I love it.
So that's amazing, even though.
So where were you living whenthis was happening?
In New Jersey, I lived inAtlanta, georgia, for a second.
(14:20):
To focus on this point to newcaregivers and to the newbies
and to the OGs everyone pours inin their own way.
So you were living in Atlanta,but for the times that you were
(14:42):
home, you were the one who gother to bathe and your mom and
your aunt.
Your aunt lived there with herthe entire time and then your
mom moved back to New Jersey.
However, they couldn't alwaysget her to.
You know, do soap and water tothe whole body and there's no
(15:03):
rhyme or reason to this.
It's like everybody who has theenergy, the emotional capacity,
just get in, just show up.
You will be amazed at what youcan think.
I know when you showed up inNew Jersey, you didn't say on
(15:25):
the airplane or if you drove.
When I get home, I'm going tosay grandmama, don't you want to
be pretty?
Like, how did it come to you toeven say pretty?
Speaker 2 (15:35):
You know, because I just remember how much she loved
to dress and she I mean mygrandma bathed all the time
twice a day In the tub and inthe sink and the shower, just
whatever she was getting it done.
So I was like I wasn't used tothis.
When they said grandma was notbathing, I'm like, huh, well,
mom wasn't bathing, so I don'tknow, I just I was like grandma,
(15:56):
let's get pretty, you want tobe pretty?
And she was like yeah, it's likeit just perks something up in
her Right.
It's like well, thank you Lordfor giving me that word, cause I
can't.
I don't understand no other way, how I can say it.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
You were there and it came to you in the moment.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
There's nothing that you could have read in a book
previously.
Your mom or your aunt could nothave taught you to do that, and
they also knew that she lovedto bathe.
But often the person or thepersons who are there and in it
every day are so bogged downwith the bits and pieces of
(16:43):
feeding or medicine and thingsof that nature that it is
wonderful when other familymembers or close friends stop by
and they have, like yourself,you're the granddaughter, right,
baby girl, and you have such awealth of knowledge about your
grandmother that the universe isable to give you such a spark
(17:08):
of light right there in themoment to do something.
That is because, okay, causeshe needs to get clean.
All right, we all can get cleanand believe it or not.
Uh, utis and infections canstart from a lack of cleanliness
.
All kind of bacteria can growin your little hoo-ha and just
(17:31):
travel.
You know it can reverseengineer.
No matter how old you are okayback up into some stuff where it
wasn't supposed to be.
Yeah so, but uh so, but thank,yeah, thank you.
Thank you for sharing how thatunfolded and I hope that others
(17:53):
know and and really learn fromyour experience, that there's
something for everybody to doand just show up and show up and
stay engaged.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
It does it, does it, does it does.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Yeah, yeah, so you have a product.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
You have a company.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Give us the name of the company and then tell us who
it's for and how it came about.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
The name of the business.
It's Send a Prayer Now and it'sa stuffed animal care package
company that sends love andprayer in a box to you,
especially to my go to around itis you know, you always see
emojis and people always orthey'll say they're praying for
somebody, but you're like arethey really praying for that
(18:42):
person?
It's like I was like, how aboutlet's just put some action
behind those words.
And since it's NationalCaregivers Month, I was like you
know what?
We're even going to buildsomething just for caregivers.
Usually every year I like todonate plushies to seniors or
caregivers because they go sounnoticed.
They really do.
You pour so much into everybodyelse, but it's not always
(19:05):
reciprocated to you, okay, holdon.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
I just want to stop you right there and say thank
you on behalf of all thecaregivers, because we do go
unnoticed, so much so that thelion's share, the majority of us
in the United States, don'teven know that November is our
damn month.
(19:28):
We don't even know we got awhole freaking month and we
don't know it's our month,freaking month, and we don't
know it's our month.
We're so busy doing the workand trying to keep afloat and
not lose our minds and ourbodies and our souls and give up
.
We don't even know it.
And to have you actually lockin enough to execute on creating
(19:54):
a company that allows peoplewho want to support us to do
something where that expressionis tangible.
So that's my, that is, that ismy air applause.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
That is my air applause.
People, they don't realize thatstuffed animals, they are their
medicine for your soul, withoutthe prescription.
You know it is, it's a, it's afeel good.
You need that hug, or you knowit's.
That's what they're there for.
Let you know you're beingappreciated, ok, so how does it
work?
So what you do?
(20:37):
You go to sendaprayernowcom andyou scroll through all of our
collection and you just pick theone that you like and then at
checkout you'll put a uh, putyour message, the note that you
want to include.
We include a prayer with it,but you also as well include the
note that you want to yourrecipient and we box it up and
ship it right out to you foryour charge.
Just have to pay the shipping.
(21:00):
You don't have to pay theshipping, you just pay for the
product to go out, but we payfor the shipping.
Wonderful, that is listening.
We are offering 10 percent offof the orders.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
What?
Yes, ok, ok.
First of all, hear thatparenting up community, okay,
okay, all right, membership hasits privileges.
I told y'all Look at that, lookat that, look at how we are
improving the economy over here.
There's two ways to have moremoney you can make more and you
(21:33):
can spend less.
We are helping you spend less.
Thank you so much for offeringthat savings and that discount
for the Parenting Up community.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
JSmiles10 at the checkout.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
One more time.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
They just need to enter code JSmiles10 at the
checkout.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Oh my God, look at that.
We got a code J smiles 10 atthe checkout.
Yay, yes, so you also.
I think you mentioned that.
Um, this is, this is for familycaregiver month.
(22:15):
This is for family caregivermonth.
Obviously, that's somethingwe're celebrating during the
month of November, but obviouslyI wouldn't go to go ahead and
go out on a limb and say yourcompany is open all year.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Absolutely it is, and it's everyone it truly is the
holidays birthdays, whatever.
You need a Pleshy pour to sendto someone when you can't be
present, but your prayers can,just to let them know that you
are truly thinking of them.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Beautiful, beautiful.
And do you have a scenario?
Let's say, maybe a person justwants to support a caregiver,
support the notion and thecommunity of caregivers, and
maybe they don't know acaregiver but they hear the
podcast and they think it's agreat idea, but the caregiver
(23:07):
that they know they're like man,I don't even know.
I don't know there, I know I'mjust a person at work, but they
just moved and I don't have theaddress.
Is there a way to just say Iwant to donate money and then
allow you to send a prayercompany to pick a caregiver or
send something to someone at afacility?
(23:29):
Do you offer that?
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Yes, absolutely, I have on the website.
You'll see on one of the matterof fact, it's on the homepage.
You just click on the donatenow, click the plus you want and
I'll take care of it for you,whether it'll go to a senior
community or if it's someone inneed that we know of another
caregiver, we'll get it to thatperson and we will let you know
who we sent it to as well.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Look at you out here, just saving, putting joy in the
world and spreading smiles.
When did you decide this is away that you would honor your
grandmother and put your stampon the ground for caregivers and
(24:18):
people who serve?
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Well, the idea came to me in 2022, but I wasn't
quite sure on how to do it yet.
And every year, every Januaryone, I go on a fast with my old
church.
We'll do a corporate fast, andit's like that's when you get to
clear your mind, you beintentional of what you're doing
for that year, and that's whenthe vision came to me.
(24:41):
You know what this is, how youneed to do it, this is the name.
You're going to name this andyou're going to be a blessing to
others.
And I'm like okay, lord, thankyou, that's just how we're going
to do this.
Remind people that they areloved, that they're seen and
that they're being cared for andthat they're always being
(25:01):
prayed for because we all needit.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Honey.
I'm okay, remember, I'm acomedian yes because, honey,
you're about to get a purchasefrom me for myself.
I'm not about to even wait fornobody to send me one.
(25:26):
I'm going to be like, hey,sheena J Smiles needs 12.
I would like one for everymonth of next year.
I would like one for everymonth of next year Okay, because
starting in January 2025, itcould be tricky starting on
January 20th.
So I'd like to receive one inJanuary, february.
And I'm like hey, j girl, youare kicking ass.
(25:48):
Hey J girl, kick me up.
This is a special little dittyfor you.
So, hey, caregivers, sendyourself one.
You'll be surprised.
You'll forget that you boughtit for yourself.
You're like, oh my God, send aserenity prayer, all kinds of
stuff.
Um, I can't remember.
(26:10):
I don't know.
This may sound totally wacky topeople, but there, totally
wacky to people.
But there, when, before my lifeas a full-time caregiver, I
traveled internationally reallyextensively, like to the point
where the uh, there were a fewcountries that thought I was a
drug mule and they would pull meover and be like, listen, ma'am
(26:31):
, in a minute we're going to doa cavity search.
I'm like whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,whoa, whoa.
That's a little extreme, butthat's just how much I travel
internationally and I would sendmyself postcards with the old
school stamp because I knew andI would say something really
(26:54):
quirky that might have happenedto me on that trip.
And it would come to me liketwo months, maybe three months
later and it would be sorefreshing because I would have
forgotten all about the postcardor whatever it was and it would
give me a tickle and be areminder.
And so I really am tellingcaregivers if you don't think
anybody's going to send you one,send your own ass, a prayer and
(27:17):
a stuff we all we got.
So, sheena, this has been aremarkable conversation.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
I have enjoyed it completely.
Speaker 1 (27:34):
And the community.
Thank you, thank you so verymuch.
I look forward to partneringwith you, potentially having you
at some of our live.
She does have some of theproducts available, so I
(28:03):
encourage you to go to ourYouTube if you listen to the
audio.
So here's a lion, and so thereare a lot of different options
of these stuffed animals, andcan you just say a few of them,
because I see some stuff behindyou yes, this is pinkly, the
prayer plush.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
This is lovey.
This is ralphie.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
This is lyric so I see like it's a lamb and uh this
is a lamb.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
He's just a little bear a dog.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Another little lamb a lamb, a bear, a dog say thank
you, jay okay, I'm a sucker forsomething that moves, um,
especially a man that moves andgoes to work.
Okay, hello, my grandmotherloved the talking, moving, any
(28:55):
kind of moving stuffed animal,that was her thing.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
That was mine.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah , so this is you know.
Again, I commend you on yourefforts and I thank you on
behalf of the continuedcommunity of caregivers.
You are a caregiver, Once acaregiver, always a caregiver.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Thank you and I appreciate this platform that
you have built for people youknow like us.
You know that can share ourstories but put some laughter
with it.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
Absolutely.
Thank you so much so, butbefore we wrap up, I end each
episode asking our guest to giveone snuggle up.
Now let me share what a snuggleup is.
(29:50):
A snuggle up is your bit ofadvice that if a person who is a
caregiver would just go aheadand snuggle up to this idea,
basically Take the licking, youknow, just swallow this nasty
(30:14):
medicine.
Life as a caregiver will beeasier, a little less stressful,
because it, while it might behard, if you will just accept
this as a truth.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Your journey as a caregiver could be a little
lighter, a little more fun, etc.
What would be a snuggle up thatyou can give to the parenting
up community?
Speaker 2 (30:44):
I would say because this is my biggest thing no
matter what, just love on them,because I feel like love is the
pathway to everything.
Because I feel like love is thepathway to everything.
So if you just love on them andjust be present, I promise you
it will get easier, because nomatter what they're going
through, when you show them love, they can't help but to just
come on in and treat you alittle bit better.
(31:05):
So my thing is just love on them, listen and be present.
Yes, indeed, and I want tosnuggle up to love all day long,
because I even believe, likewith my grandmother, with the
being pretty, even though shehad dementia, she still had love
(31:28):
in her heart and spirit andspirit connect.
So I'm just like, yeah, it'sthe love, it's the love.
Just show them love, the love,just show them love.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
That's it.
That's the bow right there.
Sendaprayercom correct.
Speaker 2 (31:40):
Yes, sendaprayernowcom.
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Okay, that's right.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
Sendaprayernowcom.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
Okay, listen here, don't go to sendaprayercom.
We don't know them people, wedon't know those people and
you're not going to get yourdiscount with Jace Mouse 10.
Sendaprayernowcom, it has beena pleasure.
Thank you so very much.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Thank you, bye, bye-bye.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
The Snuggle Ups.
Number one Sunlight is seriousmedicine for the soul Vitamin D,
call it whatever you want to.
You got to have it, no matterwhere you live in this world.
Everybody in the medical fieldstatistically will say, hey, get
(32:35):
some sunlight.
It doesn't even matter what thetemperature is.
So if you are somewhere and thesun is starting to set a little
bit early, or maybe you onlyget six months of sunlight a
year and then in the other sixmonths it's dark or cold or
rainy, then you got to take asupplement.
(32:56):
You got to take you somevitamin D.
Maybe there's certain fruit orfood or vegetables that will
give you extra vitamin D Leafyvegetables like broccoli and
kale but do it Because as acaregiver or a caregiver village
supporter, we don't have timeto be on edge and extra pissy
(33:22):
simply because our vitamin D islow.
Don't let the holiday season ifyou are, let's say, in the
northern hemisphere November,december, january that's a lot
of holidays for many people whopractice any kind of Christian
(33:48):
If you're Christian, you do theKwanzaa, hanukkah.
That's a whole lot of people,there's millions and millions,
and it's dark and it's cold.
Do something in advance tofortify yourself, okay.
Number two Dementia, especiallyAlzheimer's doesn't always last
(34:15):
for years and decades.
You better get in there and useyour time wisely.
Sheena and her mama and themhad a few months after her
grandmother's diagnosis.
Oh my, they had like four, five, six months.
Zanny and I are in year 12 andcounting.
(34:38):
Some people have 20 years.
So if you're a caregiver, afamily member of a person with
Alzheimer's, and you're thinking, oh, the kid was diagnosed last
week, I'm going to try to getby there before the year ends.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, that'sme tapping you on your temple.
(35:02):
You don't know how freakinglong you have, because you know
what.
We don't know what causesdementia.
We don't understand the source,which is why we cannot fix it.
So they can't freaking tell youhow long it will last.
(35:24):
It is not like cancer, it isnot like heart disease.
So snuggle up to that.
Go see your people.
If you're giving shit aboutthem, I'm not here to judge,
just want you to understand.
Ain't no rhyme or reason tothis thing.
(35:45):
Baby Number three listen and letlove lead.
Y'all heard Sheena.
She just was listening to thefact that her mama and her
auntie and nobody else thecaregivers that they hired could
get grandmama to bathe.
And as she sat there, she justsaid Grandma, don't you want to
(36:06):
be pretty?
Grandmama said Shoot, yeah,heck, yeah.
(36:32):
You don't know in advance howthe universe will use you to
benefit your loved every anglethat's required to keep this
snowball rolling or to keep thispebble getting pushed down the
road.
You know what I mean.
Show up, don't be so concernedabout how your visit will go or
(37:00):
what the conversation willentail.
You can't prepare for this likean exam in school or like an
interview with a job.
Just show up, let love lead.
The universe will take care ofthe rest.
The parenting up community,baby number one.
(37:23):
We always going up.
Yeah, what's up?
Y'all?
I'm over here just mixing andscratching up stuff and
reminding y'all, I'm over herejust mixing and scratching up
stuff.
And reminding y'all, Patreon isopen.
It is open and ready for you,you, you, you and your mama too.
(37:46):
We are loading up things, Allthings Zetty, all things podcast
, all things caregiving behindthe scenes, extra stuff.
J Smile's comedy is droppingwith her own little collection
within the J Smile Studio,Patreon.
Very, very soon.
(38:07):
It'll be less than a month Ifyou want to go on and get in
there, because there'sexclusives.
That's kind of time sensitiveto whoever is in there first.
That's kind of time sensitiveto whoever is in there first.
We've already had livebroadcasts for people who are
already in and I'm going to behonest because of, you know,
(38:28):
branding matters.
So there's some stuff that Ijust can't say and do on the
World Wide Web that I can do inthe Patreon pantry.
So if you want to see and knowand hear and experience more of
what's happening between my ears, come to the J Smile studio, my
(38:52):
Patreon pantry.
Parenting Up family.
We did it, we did it and wereally means you.
Thank you so much.
Supporters, caregivers,everybody in the village.
We got an award.
Baby, we did it.
Mama, we made it.
Hilarity for Charity, hfc oneof the most preeminent
foundations, foundations in thewhole nation around caregiving
(00:27):
and awareness and brain healthand Alzheimer's made us, the
Parenting Up community, ourpodcast top three for the whole
year.
Yes, hfc boom.
That's Seth Rogen and LaurenMiller-R.
They decided that we wanted athree best for the whole year.
(00:50):
Couldn't have done it withouty'all.
That's from Zeddy.
I know she would have gavey'all a big old, wet, sloppy
kiss.
Parenting up caregivingadventures with comedian Smiles
is the intense journey ofunexpectedly being fully
responsible for my mama.
For over a decade I've beenchipping away at the unknown,
(01:13):
advocating for her and pushingAlzheimer's awareness on anyone
and anything with a heartbeat.
Spoiler alert this shit isheavy.
That's why I started doingcomedy.
So be ready for the jokes.
Caregiver newbies, ogs andvillage members just willing to
(01:34):
prop up a caregiver, you are inthe right place.
Hi, this is Zeddy.
I hope you enjoy my daughter'spodcast.
Is that okay?
Today's supporter shout outLaQuinda Thomas, 64, 17.
(02:02):
My great grandmother died at 101in 1979.
I was 13.
And she would always say Blackwomen are strong and we always
have been the mother of humanity.
And today our power is in ourvote because we are to always be
opposite of what is wrong withhumanity.
(02:25):
The knowledge of truth FromYouTube.
Listen, zeddy would agree withyour great grandmother.
If you want to be featured as asupporter, shout out a word.
Porter, shout out a row.
Then leave a comment and areview on Apple Podcasts,
(02:49):
youtube or Instagram.
Thank you.
Today's episode sending love andspreading smiles, showing
caregivers.
You care, parented Up,community.
You know how we do it.
We always find someone that isfun, fantastic and full of
(03:14):
information.
Why?
Because the universe lovescaregivers.
The universe knows we aregetting our ass kicked every
single minute of every day andtoday we have somebody that
feels like a sister, cousin.
You know, when you come acrosspeople like do I know you?
Did your mama or grandmama goto school with my mama or
(03:36):
grandmama?
Because the energy just hitslike so much.
So we were through filming andrecording for this month, but
the interview went so well thepre-episode interview I had to
call the team and say listen,okay, listen, we got to figure
this one out to score walls,this chicken cause, this one
(03:57):
just feels so right.
Yep, I think this is the firsttime I've ever done this.
Hell yeah.
So here we go, let's get it in.
Parenting Up Community.
Meet my girl, sheena.
What's up, sheena?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Hey Jay, hey Parenting Community, how y'all
doing today.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Girl, you are what I call a let's talk and let's do.
Yes, Right so you are part ofthe caregiving community, the
village community, so your momwas the primary caregiver for
your grandmother.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
And then out of that you've also created a product
that will help caregivers.
But before we I don't want toget ahead of ourselves, but I do
like tempting our audience sothey know what's ahead and have
a reason to lock in and stay onboard.
In the audio and in the video,let us know what your
(05:05):
grandmother's disease ailmentwas.
As I recall, she's no longer aphysical body on Earth.
Is that correct?
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Yeah, she's not here anymore.
She died in 2004.
She did, yeah, that was a toughyear.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
That's the same year my grandmother got her wings.
I don't know if I knew thatfrom our previous conversation.
Girl, I'm going to have to putsome stronger in my coffee.
Listen, look, I put a littleBaylis in here.
I'm going to have to go putsome 1738.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Not no more than 1738 .
Yes, this is the Remy Martin1738.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Look, everybody knows that is my go-to.
This is the way that I stay offthat cane.
Remy Martin 1738 helped me stayaway from cocaine.
People can talk about cognac ifthey want to, but it is better
than cocaine.
It is okay.
That much I can promise you.
So yeah, 2004 took me over theedge, sweetheart, with my
(06:15):
grandmother passing.
Let us know what was herdisease.
What was her disease?
And then, how did you all kindof determine that something was
going on with your grandmother,and what were the steps that you
took medically for hertreatment?
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Well, honestly, she didn't get diagnosed till my
grandma died at 91.
And that's the same year shegot it.
So it was like that summer shewas fine.
In March I had went there formy birthday.
She was her normal self, alwaysjoking when she sees you, baby,
you're getting so fat.
I'm like grandma.
I look the same I did when yousent me last year no, no them
(06:58):
hips.
I'm like okay, honey, if yousay so.
But anyhow, after you know, wejust had our good outings, as we
used to.
And then when I went back homeI would say that was August she
started deteriorating.
She just was in her same jollyself.
So, my mother, they took her tothe doctors and they were like
you know, it's the onset ofdementia she was going through
(07:20):
because she started forgettingshe would leave the stove on.
She became more argumentativeand it just wasn't a good
situation.
She ended up being hospitalizedfor a little while because her
blood pressure and all thatstuff was up, and then she came
home and that November shepassed away.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Wow, that was kind of fast.
It sounds like in the scheme oflife it wasn't a lot of years.
No kind of fast.
It sounds like in the scheme oflife that wasn't a it wasn't a
lot of years.
No, not at all.
When you said she wasargumentative, was that with
everybody or with specificfamily members?
Speaker 2 (07:59):
With my aunt that was there with her all the time.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
So my grandma would leave the stove on and my aunt
was like turn up now.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
You know, I like to cook.
So one night my aunt slept inthe basement.
So my grandmother had lockedthe basement door and I heard
this knocking on the door.
My grandmother's up because shegets up at the crack of the
dawn.
She's sitting in her chair likeshe never heard the door.
No one knocking at the door andshe's like ain't nobody there.
I was like grandma, there'sauntie down there.
(08:32):
You know, you don't lock her inthe basement.
I didn't lock her down there.
I didn't lock her down there.
But I said this is gave yourauntie that cared for her every
(08:56):
day the most pushback yes, shedid, and it was unfortunate
because she'd do anything Any ofus would do anything for her,
but she gave her the mostpushback.
And if say, for instance, theywere arguing about something and
I took my aunt's side, oh, youdon't love me, and no, I thought
(09:17):
she was in for me.
I'm like grandma really.
So then you know I getemotional because that's grandma
.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Right, where did your grandmother grow up?
Speaker 2 (09:27):
She where did she grow up?
She grew up in Virginia, but welived in New Jersey for years.
Ok, OK.
She's a northern girl, spicy.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely Did she.
When the doctors diagnosed her,did they just say dementia, or
did they say Alzheimer's orParkinson's?
Or they just said dementia.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
OK she did have diabetes, but they just said it
was just dementia, just theonset of dementia.
And when I say it was quickly,it was quickly because when I
said she was fine all her years,until just that that August was
where she started todeteriorate.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
So it was just a few months.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Yeah, just a few months.
And my grandfather had passedat 99, and she lived five years
after he passed, so that wasn'teven an issue, because you know,
sometimes that can triggerdifferent emotions, but no, she
was fine, absolutely yes,different emotions, but no, she
was fine, absolutely yes, that'sas um many in the parenting up
community know.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
That's medically.
You never know about any ofthis shit, but it appears that's
what happened with my mom.
Um, something might've beenlike, you know, something in the
milk wasn't clean, but it wasactually my dad's passing that
just ripped the top off the canand my mom, you know, within a
(10:53):
handful of months she was at twofull blown forms of dementia
and she couldn't care forherself in any significant way.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
When you're did your mom ever share anything with you
about the care of yourgrandmother?
Yeah, they hired someone tocome in to take care of her,
along with my aunt, and my momwas there because my mom lived
in New Jersey at the time andthen she came back home to stay
just during the duration of theperiod that she got the
(11:29):
diagnosis and she was just likeit was a lot, because you go
from seeing your mom jolly happyto I still know who you are,
but I'm not functioning to thecapacity that she normally would
.
She didn't want to take a bathand when I would come home I was
like, grandma, don't you wantto be pretty?
(11:51):
And she was like, yeah.
So mom was like you're the onlyone that can get to take a bath
.
I said, well, thank God.
I was like come on, grandma,let's get pretty, okay.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Hold up just a minute , sheena.
Your grandmother would bathewhen you gave her the.
I guess the Q word was pretty.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
She said listen here, Now don't nobody care about
being clean or smelling good,this dirt is fine.
However, I do want to remainpretty.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
The various things that a different, you know
individuals keep as a, as atrigger, or I wouldn't say a
trigger often is negative.
But so I want to think of amore positive as a reminder, a
reminder point or a word thatsays, yeah, OK, oh, yeah, that's
, that's a positive, that's OK,yeah, okay, oh yeah, that's a
positive, that's okay, yeah.
So with my mom is that redlipstick baby?
If I'm trying to get her to gosomewhere, I want her to do
(13:13):
something.
If I pull that thing out, shewants to put that on.
And now, all of a sudden, nowwe can comb the hair, now we can
brush the teeth.
Okay, now we can put some shoeson, because red lipsticks means
first things first.
We about to go somewhereoutside of the house and do
something, so grandma wanted tolook pretty.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
Yes, honey, cause my grandmother loved to dress,
she's going to have her bestsuits on, I mean, even around
the house.
You know, sometimes granniesare wearing their muumuu's back
the day, remember muumu?
Yes, yeah, honey, she's goingto know.
She got on her skirt and hershirt and her shoes and her
little knee highs.
I'm like okay, granny, you'regoing to be pretty all day long
(13:57):
and fly.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
I love it.
So that's amazing, even though.
So where were you living whenthis was happening?
In New Jersey, I lived inAtlanta, georgia, for a second.
(14:20):
To focus on this point to newcaregivers and to the newbies
and to the OGs everyone pours inin their own way.
So you were living in Atlanta,but for the times that you were
(14:42):
home, you were the one who gother to bathe and your mom and
your aunt.
Your aunt lived there with herthe entire time and then your
mom moved back to New Jersey.
However, they couldn't alwaysget her to.
You know, do soap and water tothe whole body and there's no
(15:03):
rhyme or reason to this.
It's like everybody who has theenergy, the emotional capacity,
just get in, just show up.
You will be amazed at what youcan think.
I know when you showed up inNew Jersey, you didn't say on
(15:25):
the airplane or if you drove.
When I get home, I'm going tosay grandmama, don't you want to
be pretty?
Like, how did it come to you toeven say pretty?
Speaker 2 (15:35):
You know, because I just remember how much she loved
to dress and she I mean mygrandma bathed all the time
twice a day In the tub and inthe sink and the shower, just
whatever she was getting it done.
So I was like I wasn't used tothis.
When they said grandma was notbathing, I'm like, huh, well,
mom wasn't bathing, so I don'tknow, I just I was like grandma,
(15:56):
let's get pretty, you want tobe pretty?
And she was like yeah, it's likeit just perks something up in
her Right.
It's like well, thank you Lordfor giving me that word, cause I
can't.
I don't understand no other way, how I can say it.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
You were there and it came to you in the moment.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
There's nothing that you could have read in a book
previously.
Your mom or your aunt could nothave taught you to do that, and
they also knew that she lovedto bathe.
But often the person or thepersons who are there and in it
every day are so bogged downwith the bits and pieces of
(16:43):
feeding or medicine and thingsof that nature that it is
wonderful when other familymembers or close friends stop by
and they have, like yourself,you're the granddaughter, right,
baby girl, and you have such awealth of knowledge about your
grandmother that the universe isable to give you such a spark
(17:08):
of light right there in themoment to do something.
That is because, okay, causeshe needs to get clean.
All right, we all can get cleanand believe it or not.
Uh, utis and infections canstart from a lack of cleanliness
.
All kind of bacteria can growin your little hoo-ha and just
(17:31):
travel.
You know it can reverseengineer.
No matter how old you are okayback up into some stuff where it
wasn't supposed to be.
Yeah so, but uh so, but thank,yeah, thank you.
Thank you for sharing how thatunfolded and I hope that others
(17:53):
know and and really learn fromyour experience, that there's
something for everybody to doand just show up and show up and
stay engaged.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
It does it, does it, does it does.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Yeah, yeah, so you have a product.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
You have a company.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Give us the name of the company and then tell us who
it's for and how it came about.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
The name of the business.
It's Send a Prayer Now and it'sa stuffed animal care package
company that sends love andprayer in a box to you,
especially to my go to around itis you know, you always see
emojis and people always orthey'll say they're praying for
somebody, but you're like arethey really praying for that
(18:42):
person?
It's like I was like, how aboutlet's just put some action
behind those words.
And since it's NationalCaregivers Month, I was like you
know what?
We're even going to buildsomething just for caregivers.
Usually every year I like todonate plushies to seniors or
caregivers because they go sounnoticed.
They really do.
You pour so much into everybodyelse, but it's not always
(19:05):
reciprocated to you, okay, holdon.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
I just want to stop you right there and say thank
you on behalf of all thecaregivers, because we do go
unnoticed, so much so that thelion's share, the majority of us
in the United States, don'teven know that November is our
damn month.
(19:28):
We don't even know we got awhole freaking month and we
don't know it's our month,freaking month, and we don't
know it's our month.
We're so busy doing the workand trying to keep afloat and
not lose our minds and ourbodies and our souls and give up
.
We don't even know it.
And to have you actually lockin enough to execute on creating
(19:54):
a company that allows peoplewho want to support us to do
something where that expressionis tangible.
So that's my, that is, that ismy air applause.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
That is my air applause.
People, they don't realize thatstuffed animals, they are their
medicine for your soul, withoutthe prescription.
You know it is, it's a, it's afeel good.
You need that hug, or you knowit's.
That's what they're there for.
Let you know you're beingappreciated, ok, so how does it
work?
So what you do?
(20:37):
You go to sendaprayernowcom andyou scroll through all of our
collection and you just pick theone that you like and then at
checkout you'll put a uh, putyour message, the note that you
want to include.
We include a prayer with it,but you also as well include the
note that you want to yourrecipient and we box it up and
ship it right out to you foryour charge.
Just have to pay the shipping.
(21:00):
You don't have to pay theshipping, you just pay for the
product to go out, but we payfor the shipping.
Wonderful, that is listening.
We are offering 10 percent offof the orders.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
What?
Yes, ok, ok.
First of all, hear thatparenting up community, okay,
okay, all right, membership hasits privileges.
I told y'all Look at that, lookat that, look at how we are
improving the economy over here.
There's two ways to have moremoney you can make more and you
(21:33):
can spend less.
We are helping you spend less.
Thank you so much for offeringthat savings and that discount
for the Parenting Up community.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
JSmiles10 at the checkout.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
One more time.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
They just need to enter code JSmiles10 at the
checkout.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Oh my God, look at that.
We got a code J smiles 10 atthe checkout.
Yay, yes, so you also.
I think you mentioned that.
Um, this is, this is for familycaregiver month.
(22:15):
This is for family caregivermonth.
Obviously, that's somethingwe're celebrating during the
month of November, but obviouslyI wouldn't go to go ahead and
go out on a limb and say yourcompany is open all year.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Absolutely it is, and it's everyone it truly is the
holidays birthdays, whatever.
You need a Pleshy pour to sendto someone when you can't be
present, but your prayers can,just to let them know that you
are truly thinking of them.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Beautiful, beautiful.
And do you have a scenario?
Let's say, maybe a person justwants to support a caregiver,
support the notion and thecommunity of caregivers, and
maybe they don't know acaregiver but they hear the
podcast and they think it's agreat idea, but the caregiver
(23:07):
that they know they're like man,I don't even know.
I don't know there, I know I'mjust a person at work, but they
just moved and I don't have theaddress.
Is there a way to just say Iwant to donate money and then
allow you to send a prayercompany to pick a caregiver or
send something to someone at afacility?
(23:29):
Do you offer that?
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Yes, absolutely, I have on the website.
You'll see on one of the matterof fact, it's on the homepage.
You just click on the donatenow, click the plus you want and
I'll take care of it for you,whether it'll go to a senior
community or if it's someone inneed that we know of another
caregiver, we'll get it to thatperson and we will let you know
who we sent it to as well.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Look at you out here, just saving, putting joy in the
world and spreading smiles.
When did you decide this is away that you would honor your
grandmother and put your stampon the ground for caregivers and
(24:18):
people who serve?
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Well, the idea came to me in 2022, but I wasn't
quite sure on how to do it yet.
And every year, every Januaryone, I go on a fast with my old
church.
We'll do a corporate fast, andit's like that's when you get to
clear your mind, you beintentional of what you're doing
for that year, and that's whenthe vision came to me.
(24:41):
You know what this is, how youneed to do it, this is the name.
You're going to name this andyou're going to be a blessing to
others.
And I'm like okay, lord, thankyou, that's just how we're going
to do this.
Remind people that they areloved, that they're seen and
that they're being cared for andthat they're always being
(25:01):
prayed for because we all needit.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Honey.
I'm okay, remember, I'm acomedian yes because, honey,
you're about to get a purchasefrom me for myself.
I'm not about to even wait fornobody to send me one.
(25:26):
I'm going to be like, hey,sheena J Smiles needs 12.
I would like one for everymonth of next year.
I would like one for everymonth of next year Okay, because
starting in January 2025, itcould be tricky starting on
January 20th.
So I'd like to receive one inJanuary, february.
And I'm like hey, j girl, youare kicking ass.
(25:48):
Hey J girl, kick me up.
This is a special little dittyfor you.
So, hey, caregivers, sendyourself one.
You'll be surprised.
You'll forget that you boughtit for yourself.
You're like, oh my God, send aserenity prayer, all kinds of
stuff.
Um, I can't remember.
(26:10):
I don't know.
This may sound totally wacky topeople, but there, totally
wacky to people.
But there, when, before my lifeas a full-time caregiver, I
traveled internationally reallyextensively, like to the point
where the uh, there were a fewcountries that thought I was a
drug mule and they would pull meover and be like, listen, ma'am
(26:31):
, in a minute we're going to doa cavity search.
I'm like whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,whoa, whoa.
That's a little extreme, butthat's just how much I travel
internationally and I would sendmyself postcards with the old
school stamp because I knew andI would say something really
(26:54):
quirky that might have happenedto me on that trip.
And it would come to me liketwo months, maybe three months
later and it would be sorefreshing because I would have
forgotten all about the postcardor whatever it was and it would
give me a tickle and be areminder.
And so I really am tellingcaregivers if you don't think
anybody's going to send you one,send your own ass, a prayer and
(27:17):
a stuff we all we got.
So, sheena, this has been aremarkable conversation.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
I have enjoyed it completely.
Speaker 1 (27:34):
And the community.
Thank you, thank you so verymuch.
I look forward to partneringwith you, potentially having you
at some of our live.
She does have some of theproducts available, so I
(28:03):
encourage you to go to ourYouTube if you listen to the
audio.
So here's a lion, and so thereare a lot of different options
of these stuffed animals, andcan you just say a few of them,
because I see some stuff behindyou yes, this is pinkly, the
prayer plush.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
This is lovey.
This is ralphie.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
This is lyric so I see like it's a lamb and uh this
is a lamb.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
He's just a little bear a dog.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Another little lamb a lamb, a bear, a dog say thank
you, jay okay, I'm a sucker forsomething that moves, um,
especially a man that moves andgoes to work.
Okay, hello, my grandmotherloved the talking, moving, any
(28:55):
kind of moving stuffed animal,that was her thing.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
That was mine.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah , so this is you know.
Again, I commend you on yourefforts and I thank you on
behalf of the continuedcommunity of caregivers.
You are a caregiver, Once acaregiver, always a caregiver.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Thank you and I appreciate this platform that
you have built for people youknow like us.
You know that can share ourstories but put some laughter
with it.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
Absolutely.
Thank you so much so, butbefore we wrap up, I end each
episode asking our guest to giveone snuggle up.
Now let me share what a snuggleup is.
(29:50):
A snuggle up is your bit ofadvice that if a person who is a
caregiver would just go aheadand snuggle up to this idea,
basically Take the licking, youknow, just swallow this nasty
(30:14):
medicine.
Life as a caregiver will beeasier, a little less stressful,
because it, while it might behard, if you will just accept
this as a truth.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Your journey as a caregiver could be a little
lighter, a little more fun, etc.
What would be a snuggle up thatyou can give to the parenting
up community?
Speaker 2 (30:44):
I would say because this is my biggest thing no
matter what, just love on them,because I feel like love is the
pathway to everything.
Because I feel like love is thepathway to everything.
So if you just love on them andjust be present, I promise you
it will get easier, because nomatter what they're going
through, when you show them love, they can't help but to just
come on in and treat you alittle bit better.
(31:05):
So my thing is just love on them, listen and be present.
Yes, indeed, and I want tosnuggle up to love all day long,
because I even believe, likewith my grandmother, with the
being pretty, even though shehad dementia, she still had love
(31:28):
in her heart and spirit andspirit connect.
So I'm just like, yeah, it'sthe love, it's the love.
Just show them love, the love,just show them love.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
That's it.
That's the bow right there.
Sendaprayercom correct.
Speaker 2 (31:40):
Yes, sendaprayernowcom.
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Okay, that's right.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
Sendaprayernowcom.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
Okay, listen here, don't go to sendaprayercom.
We don't know them people, wedon't know those people and
you're not going to get yourdiscount with Jace Mouse 10.
Sendaprayernowcom, it has beena pleasure.
Thank you so very much.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Thank you, bye, bye-bye.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
The Snuggle Ups.
Number one Sunlight is seriousmedicine for the soul Vitamin D,
call it whatever you want to.
You got to have it, no matterwhere you live in this world.
Everybody in the medical fieldstatistically will say, hey, get
(32:35):
some sunlight.
It doesn't even matter what thetemperature is.
So if you are somewhere and thesun is starting to set a little
bit early, or maybe you onlyget six months of sunlight a
year and then in the other sixmonths it's dark or cold or
rainy, then you got to take asupplement.
(32:56):
You got to take you somevitamin D.
Maybe there's certain fruit orfood or vegetables that will
give you extra vitamin D Leafyvegetables like broccoli and
kale but do it Because as acaregiver or a caregiver village
supporter, we don't have timeto be on edge and extra pissy
(33:22):
simply because our vitamin D islow.
Don't let the holiday season ifyou are, let's say, in the
northern hemisphere November,december, january that's a lot
of holidays for many people whopractice any kind of Christian
(33:48):
If you're Christian, you do theKwanzaa, hanukkah.
That's a whole lot of people,there's millions and millions,
and it's dark and it's cold.
Do something in advance tofortify yourself, okay.
Number two Dementia, especiallyAlzheimer's doesn't always last
(34:15):
for years and decades.
You better get in there and useyour time wisely.
Sheena and her mama and themhad a few months after her
grandmother's diagnosis.
Oh my, they had like four, five, six months.
Zanny and I are in year 12 andcounting.
(34:38):
Some people have 20 years.
So if you're a caregiver, afamily member of a person with
Alzheimer's, and you're thinking, oh, the kid was diagnosed last
week, I'm going to try to getby there before the year ends.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, that'sme tapping you on your temple.
(35:02):
You don't know how freakinglong you have, because you know
what.
We don't know what causesdementia.
We don't understand the source,which is why we cannot fix it.
So they can't freaking tell youhow long it will last.
(35:24):
It is not like cancer, it isnot like heart disease.
So snuggle up to that.
Go see your people.
If you're giving shit aboutthem, I'm not here to judge,
just want you to understand.
Ain't no rhyme or reason tothis thing.
(35:45):
Baby Number three listen and letlove lead.
Y'all heard Sheena.
She just was listening to thefact that her mama and her
auntie and nobody else thecaregivers that they hired could
get grandmama to bathe.
And as she sat there, she justsaid Grandma, don't you want to
(36:06):
be pretty?
Grandmama said Shoot, yeah,heck, yeah.
(36:32):
You don't know in advance howthe universe will use you to
benefit your loved every anglethat's required to keep this
snowball rolling or to keep thispebble getting pushed down the
road.
You know what I mean.
Show up, don't be so concernedabout how your visit will go or
(37:00):
what the conversation willentail.
You can't prepare for this likean exam in school or like an
interview with a job.
Just show up, let love lead.
The universe will take care ofthe rest.
The parenting up community,baby number one.
(37:23):
We always going up.
Yeah, what's up?
Y'all?
I'm over here just mixing andscratching up stuff and
reminding y'all, I'm over herejust mixing and scratching up
stuff.
And reminding y'all, Patreon isopen.
It is open and ready for you,you, you, you and your mama too.
(37:46):
We are loading up things, Allthings Zetty, all things podcast
, all things caregiving behindthe scenes, extra stuff.
J Smile's comedy is droppingwith her own little collection
within the J Smile Studio,Patreon.
Very, very soon.
(38:07):
It'll be less than a month Ifyou want to go on and get in
there, because there'sexclusives.
That's kind of time sensitiveto whoever is in there first.
That's kind of time sensitiveto whoever is in there first.
We've already had livebroadcasts for people who are
already in and I'm going to behonest because of, you know,
(38:28):
branding matters.
So there's some stuff that Ijust can't say and do on the
World Wide Web that I can do inthe Patreon pantry.
So if you want to see and knowand hear and experience more of
what's happening between my ears, come to the J Smile studio, my
(38:52):
Patreon pantry.
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Intentionally Disturbing
Join me on this podcast as I navigate the murky waters of human behavior, current events, and personal anecdotes through in-depth interviews with incredible people—all served with a generous helping of sarcasm and satire. After years as a forensic and clinical psychologist, I offer a unique interview style and a low tolerance for bullshit, quickly steering conversations toward depth and darkness. I honor the seriousness while also appreciating wit. I’m your guide through the twisted labyrinth of the human psyche, armed with dark humor and biting wit.