Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_15 (00:01):
That's right, folks.
It's the Friday.
Pats peeps podcasts here withthat.
Applause go thank you.
Yeah, you feel the same way.
Happy Friday, Junior Pats Peeps,339.
My lips can barely move.
(00:23):
What?
What are you talking about?
What?
26th day of September.
26th day of September 2021.
Looking out of my studio windowinto the beautiful foothills of
Northern California.
It's another hot one.
Well, it's yeah.
I see another hot one.
Last couple of days it wasactually pretty cool.
(00:44):
I don't know where are we at inthe 90s, maybe the lower 90s,
but it is a Friday.
Thank you for being there.
My name is Pat Walsh, host ofthe Pat Walsh show, heard on uh
Terrestrial Radio, KFBK 93.1 FM,1530 a.m.
Um 7 to 10 p.m.
Monday through Friday.
(01:04):
Streaming everywhere on the freeiHeart app and all of your apps,
just like this podcast is.
Now, when I say my lips won'tbarely move, uh, you know, I
listen, my whole life is a isit's just a dental nightmare.
So I'm not going to get allgraphic about you know what?
I look back at my podcast, Ilook at the numbers of my
podcasts.
(01:25):
I probably the lowest number Iever got for any of my podcasts
was one day when I was talkingabout the horrors that I had
undergone in a uh dentalprocedure the previous day.
Because people don't want tohear about that, it's brutal.
Anyhow, so suffice it to say,hey, happy Friday.
(01:46):
Wherever you are.
So my face is numb.
My lips are numb.
It's getting a little bitbetter.
Like I had to wait a littlewhile because just a few minutes
ago, I don't even I guess I cansay my F's.
There we go.
F's.
See?
Or my S is.
I couldn't say it for a while.
F he was doing that.
F then I I came home, you know,I thought, well, let me get a
(02:12):
cup of coffee.
I I it only had one cup.
I used to drink two cups.
Come home, drink a cup ofcoffee.
You know, this is the wrongmove.
Can I just tell you a littleadvice here on Pat's Peeps 399?
Like if your lips are numb,don't chew a lot, because I
remember one time I chewed theinside of my cheek, too, and
that wasn't good.
My dentist was telling me abouta lady who chewed her lip
(02:35):
because it was numb.
But I highly suggest I recommendagainst hot coffee.
You know, as the lips are stillnumb.
I thought they were gettingbetter, you know, so I felt
confident enough because it'dbeen a while be sin and I tipped
the coffee, and still my bottomlip is like and it just didn't
(02:57):
work, so whatever.
But you know what?
I'm on my way to havingeverything better, my
dental-wise, so whatever.
And then when I'm in the dentistoffice, because so I had to have
two crowns replaced, and now thetwo crowns are temporary.
(03:19):
You know, it takes a couple ofweeks, they gotta do the mold,
they gotta do all that, and thenthey gotta make the crowns.
So I'm gonna have these done twoweeks before, uh, thank
goodness, before I go to Sicily.
But right now I have thetemporaries in.
And then one thing they'll tellyou, Oksana told me this today.
She's the dental uh assistant, Iguess, is the right word.
I hope that's the right word,anyhow.
(03:42):
And she told me, okay, Patrick,she says, now whatever you do,
again, these are temporaries.
Whatever you do, you know, don'teat anything crunchy or sticky.
I said, Oh, darn it, I was gonnago to go get a nut-covered uh,
you know, caramel apple rightafter I was done with this.
(04:02):
Anyhow.
So nothing crunchy and nothingsticky.
One thing I'm terrified of rightnow, and I will not eat because
of the dental situation, ispopcorn.
You know, you're eating popcorn,you get that granny, and we used
to call them grannies, that uncun pop kernel, bust your teeth.
(04:24):
At least that's my experience.
So I don't eat it, even when myteeth are fine.
I yeah, occasionally, because Ido like popcorn, but but uh
yeah, so a couple days ago I hadmy car worked on.
Thanks to Darlene with a wifefor giving me a ride up to the
shop.
I had to drop my car off for acouple of days.
She's a great friend.
You're a great friend, Darlene.
I know you're listening to meright now.
(04:46):
And uh anyhow, so at the thisplace that I take my car to,
they do a great job at Pat'sPeeps, Auto Vantage.
It's Auto Vantage in Auburn.
And when they're done, they areso nice, they always leave you
of all things a little bag ofCracker Jacks.
(05:07):
Now, that's a la that's exactlywhat she told me not to have was
anything sticky, anythingcrunchy, not the cracker jacks
are the crunchy.
They used to have peanuts inthem back when they cut back on
the budget.
To me, that was always the bestpart of the Cracker Jacks.
Better than the caramel corn,which I love, and better than
(05:27):
the cheap prize that was inthere.
The prizes used to be kind ofokay when you were a kid.
Now they're cheap as can be.
You know, let's say Gavin Newsomtattoo, whatever.
Temporary tattoo.
It's like temporary governor.
Well, he's been there a while,to be honest.
But anyhow, I'm not gonna godown that road.
(05:47):
So oddly enough, I had openedthat bag of Cracker Jacks last
night, not so much to eat it,but to kind of sift through it.
To see what the quota was, whatthe you know, it used to be,
what was that the right word?
Like what the percentage ofpeanuts were in a small bag,
(06:13):
complimentary bag of CrackerJacks.
It wasn't the box, it's like alittle bag.
So I poured it into a bowl.
What I wasn't expecting thatthere would be a prize in there,
because I just thought thosecame in the boxes.
But there was actually a prizein there.
So when I pour this into a bowl,I'll pop the prize.
(06:35):
We'll check the prize because Ireally don't know.
I mean, they're so chinsy now.
But uh we'll check the prize andsee what I got.
But do you know in this bag, andagain the bag is a little
smaller than the uh in the box.
(06:57):
Do you know how many peanutswere in this?
Three.
There was three peanuts, andthere was a little like broken
piece.
Kind of like my tooth.
You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_11 (07:16):
What do you want
when you gotta eat something?
And it's gotta be sweet, andit's gotta be a lot and it can't
break your teeth out.
What do you want?
SPEAKER_15 (07:34):
Jack and Jackson.
Remember this commercial?
I can't remember that guy'sname.
I love that guy, the actor inthat commercial.
Jack Gifford, 1967, JackGifford.
SPEAKER_11 (07:50):
What do you get when
you open the top?
You get a broken tooth and mapyour lip and turn it over and
fill it out.
SPEAKER_15 (08:01):
You know, when
you're a kid, you just mow them
down.
You just pull out the crack, youjust got the box, you rip the
lid off, you just pour them inthere, man.
Shove them in your hand, justjam them in.
No worries.
Now that I'm a doach.
SPEAKER_11 (08:13):
What do you get?
Lip, back and whip, back andfatty, whack and okay, back and
fatty.
SPEAKER_15 (08:18):
Broken tooth and
money.
SPEAKER_11 (08:21):
Cracker jacks.
SPEAKER_15 (08:24):
Peanuts and a pies.
That's what you get with CrackerJacks.
You know, it's been so longsince I've seen that commercial.
I mean, literally, forever.
I can't even believe that.
And I still know the man, thethe logo, like we were talking
about cigarettes the other day,the the music and the slogans
and everything.
They stick with you.
(08:47):
By the way, I just noticed thatRobert Plant has new music out.
I thought we'd take a listen tothat.
I haven't listened to it yet,but I just noticed it when I was
getting ready for the show.
But before that, let's open theI've got the uh Cracker Jack
Prize here on Pat's Peeps$3.99.
(09:08):
Let's open it up, see what wegot here.
Alright, it says Cracker JackPrize inside arcade, whatever
that means.
So let's open it.
Let's see what it is.
This is a unlock classic games.
(09:28):
What?
Unlock classic games.
Oh, it's a sticker.
How is that a classic game?
It's a sticker of a like alittle.
It says uh find pick inside,visit crackerjack.com, there's
their plug, follow thedirections step by step, and
(09:51):
then start playing.
So man, they're so cheap now.
Remember, they used to havetoys.
They used to have toys insideCracker Jacks.
Let me see what they were.
What toys?
I'm gonna Google this one.
Bing and Cracker Jacks.
I had to Google that one.
I hadn't thought about that one.
Let's uh should I use Bing?
(10:12):
Come on, someone tell me.
Oh, there used to be, okay,rings.
Oh yeah, right.
Plastic figurines, paper horns,whistles.
I remember the whistles.
Expanding fans, miniature books,I remember those too.
And decoder rings.
(10:34):
Prizes evolving from metal andcelluloid trinkets in the early
20th century to safer, moremodern plastic prizes, and
stickers over time.
Yeah, safer, cheaper, is whatyou really want to say.
So, anyhow, hey, let's listen tosome Robert Plant new music.
(10:54):
Oh, I just I didn't even mean tohit him that time.
Little P got excited when I saidthat.
So this is this must have justcome out.
What is this?
Hold up.
What is that now?
Is that what I was trying toplay?
I didn't even start anything.
Oh, that's it.
It just started.
I swear I didn't even touch it.
(11:16):
Ticket taker.
Robert Plant, Pat's Peeps 339.
SPEAKER_05 (11:29):
Tonight's the night
when the waters rise.
SPEAKER_15 (11:32):
Oh, he's got a duet.
SPEAKER_05 (11:33):
You grow back in the
door.
The ticket takes count the manwho can afford the art.
Susie D'N ticket takers will notboard D I A ticket takers a time
for five and change an hour.
They will count the passers by.
(11:59):
They say the sky's a limit, butthe sky's about to fall.
SPEAKER_15 (12:04):
I can barely hear
Robert's voice in the mix.
SPEAKER_06 (12:06):
Down come all the
record books, Craig L.
They say before he paid that thebox affair no pain.
But somewhere there's a cabinetwith a ticket in the ray.
SPEAKER_15 (12:23):
I think he was
really influenced by Alice and
Krause.
Remember when they did that,those records together?
Robert and Allison.
SPEAKER_07 (12:36):
What else have you
got?
I am a ticket taker.
And I will be all.
SPEAKER_15 (12:52):
Hmm.
I like it.
I don't hear really hearRobert's.
Maybe it'll change up in thatway.
I don't want to get in trouble.
I don't want to play too much ofhis new music.
He'll come knocking on my door.
SPEAKER_16 (13:05):
Patrick Robert here,
Robert.
SPEAKER_15 (13:07):
That's a terrible
impersonation of him.
Uh let's see.
It's his new album.
Let's see.
Robert Plant unveils SavingGrace with a new band.
It's his new band featuringvocalist Susie Deanne.
D-I-A-N.
(13:28):
Title of the new album, um,available today, the 26th.
Debut from Robert with his newassortment of band members.
Ollie Jefferson on drums,guitarist Tony Kelsey, banjo and
string player, Matt Worley, andthen uh cellist Barney Morse
(13:53):
Brown.
Let's take another listen.
This is uh this is called Soulof a Man.
If you're gonna go see RobertPlant thinking you're gonna see
Led Zeppelin, you're you're notgoing to see Led Zeppelin.
SPEAKER_19 (14:19):
Won't somebody tell
me Won't somebody tell me Won't
somebody tell me what you wantto tell me Won't somebody tell
(14:43):
me I'm gonna ask a questionplease answer if you can Is
there anybody's children cantell me?
Tell me what is the soul of aman on some see that that can't
(15:04):
be Robert singing.
I don't hear any if you can lookon some.
SPEAKER_15 (15:15):
Is that Robert's?
I like this right here.
I like the song actually.
Yeah, I mean, I'm gonna checkthis out.
That does not sound like Robertto me.
(15:35):
That might be someone else inthe band singing, or maybe it's
his voice changing, or I don'tknow.
Again, I don't know enough aboutthis record to really uh tell
you anything.
I just wanted I just saw it, soI wanted to share that with you.
I still regret that I didn't sayhi to him.
I'll always sit with me downthere in Napa.
(15:56):
When he I went down therespecifically for that reason,
like I told you, probably heardthat on my previous podcast.
And there he is, he walks rightby me.
Like right next to me.
We're the only people sittingthere, me and my buddy Dave
having a beer, having lunch.
We went there to maybe run intohim and say hi and introduce
myself.
I couldn't do it.
I clammed up, man.
(16:16):
He's right there.
That's why the only picture Ihave is me stalking him from
behind.
Like I couldn't get the nerveup.
Isn't that stuff I would neverhave that problem now?
So, anyhow, there you go.
New Robert Plant music.
You know, uh I've been off thelast couple of days of my show.
(16:36):
We had technical difficulties onWednesday, and then I had big uh
lunches yesterday.
Maybe some of you saw I um wasin a taco eating contest at Jim
Boy's tacos.
I knew I wasn't gonna win.
First of all, I was having teethissues, which I just like I
(17:00):
mentioned, I'm getting themfixed now.
But I'm just not gonna do that.
I I'm gonna try, but I'm not I'mnot going to win the contest.
Put it that way.
I'm just not.
That's just not me.
But I had a good time.
Plus, I love Jim Boy's tacos.
I told you that there might be abig, some big news today.
(17:21):
It won't be today.
We stayed focused on ourcharities because I want to
thank Jim Boys for allowing meand some other media members,
Tamara Berg, Marcus Allen, andsome others, Judy Farah, to
participate in the Jim Boys TacoEating contest.
Then we had to eat a chiro,which I'd never even had a chiro
before.
(17:42):
Um, I did not win, but I got youknow what?
They gave me money for mycharity, that's what mattered.
Here we were at the end of theuh day yesterday.
It was oh, hello.
No, that's not it.
Where were we?
No, that's no, maybe I don'thave that.
Oh no, you know what it was?
(18:04):
It was on uh I put you know whatit was?
I didn't put it on my um I'lltell you where it is.
It's right here.
I put it on Facebook, so you cansee that on Facebook.
Patrick here at Am at Jim Boy'sTacos.
And it's uh we're having a tacoeating contest.
I'm never gonna do well in ataco eating contest.
Look at this.
Look at this.
(18:24):
You know who does well in tacoeating contests?
It was just a big mess.
And I said, look at this.
SPEAKER_17 (18:29):
Marcus, Alan,
they're always doing this.
Look at this.
SPEAKER_15 (18:42):
Tamara Berg from
Channel 3.
She had her all the taco meatoff the tacos, and she put it
all together on the plate likeshe was gonna like eat all the
tortillas.
The tortillas were stacked, likeshe thought maybe she could eat
all the tortillas and thenshovel the taco meat down her
gulvet, but it didn't seem towork.
The secret is they can hurry upand eat the tacos like that.
SPEAKER_17 (19:01):
Seven tacos, seven
tacos.
Well, we're gonna eat seventacos and winds.
I will never eat it window.
I'm eating tacos.
SPEAKER_16 (19:19):
What's going on
here?
What is your technique?
Was it the gesture we're gonnaeat these and then and then
separate the ones?
SPEAKER_17 (19:28):
I was gonna eat this
like a kick to be up and then
shovel this in like a kit forthe Christmas story.
Remember that!
SPEAKER_18 (19:40):
Here's your
opportunity to do that if you'd
like to do that right now.
Okay.
SPEAKER_15 (19:49):
I don't know what
how he does it, so it's the s
now we're talking to MarcusAllen.
I wanna see one.
So I I even want against thisdude.
We had like a what was it like abig turkey leg or something or
uh at the fair?
We had to have a copy.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_18 (20:05):
A big what was it?
A rib or a rip?
We've done it all.
I think it was a rib.
I feel like I have a beef.
Something beef, something beef.
Anyhow, you want that too?
I know what it is, because Ifeel intimidated to be next to
this guy.
Oh yeah, the media! I don't wantto blow it in front of him.
Congratulations, man.
Congratulations to you andtalent!
SPEAKER_17 (20:27):
So, Jim Boys is very
generous as they uh donate to
our favorite charities again.
I didn't win.
But you know what?
I enjoyed some good tacos, andI'm taking some Jim Boys! Maybe
it'll be a Pat's peep.
SPEAKER_15 (20:44):
What was that?
What did I say at the end?
Maybe it'll be a Pat's peep?
Oh, wouldn't that be nice?
Keep your fingers crossed, myfriends.
That would be huge for Pat'sPeeps.
We support each other, so I'mI'm keeping my finger.
That was I was hoping to tellyou that news today, but we'll
see.
We'll see.
(21:05):
Uh the other thing, then all myclients from my radio show that
I endorse.
Uh and the the other, when I sayclients, I'm talking about local
businesses.
These are businesses inSacramento that I endorse on my
radio show, and then the otherclients that the other radio
show uh hosts uh represent aswell.
(21:25):
We had a big get-togetheryesterday, right after the taco
eating contest, to where I wentto another restaurant
immediately afterwards,Bennett's, which is a local
restaurant as well.
I love these places.
And guess what they had?
Tacos.
Yay! They had sliders, tacos,they had everything you could
want.
It was an awesome day.
(21:46):
They had these uh blackberrymargaritas, which were
outstanding.
And so I really had anopportunity yesterday to
represent not only Pat's Peeps,but my radio show and KFPK and
iHeart and meet all of thesewonderful people that are all
(22:07):
part of this community.
And I say thank you to all ofyou.
I wasn't able to go on my showWednesday night because of
technical difficulties we had,and then last night because of,
again, these meetings.
One of the things I wanted todo, and so tonight I'm gonna
catch up.
Tonight I'm gonna do some of thethings on my show that I
intended to do this week, butthen I did not get an
(22:29):
opportunity to do.
On Wednesday, one of the thingsI wanted to talk about was the
fact that it was uh it will itwould have been Phil Hartman's
birthday.
You remember Phil Hartman?
He was in what news radio, theTV show.
He was, of course, on SaturdayNight Live.
He was by far, in my estimation,for a while there, uh the most
talented member, and in myestimation, in my opinion, still
(22:51):
one of the more talented membersever of Saturday Night Live.
And I thought it would be funbecause I am gonna talk about
him on my show tonight.
I'll probably talk about himwith Ken Dog, but I wanted to
play a couple of things here, orat least one thing from Phil
(23:13):
Hartman.
So let's go back to SaturdayNight Live, shall we?
I think that Phil Hartman didthe best impersonation of Bill
Clinton ever.
So he'll here's Phil Hartmandoing Bill Clinton, who at this
time is running for president,and he's visiting a McDonald's
(23:34):
on Pat's Peeps 339.
SPEAKER_02 (23:37):
All right, boys.
SPEAKER_12 (23:39):
Let's stop in here
for a second.
I'm a little parked from thejog.
Ah, sir.
We've only been jogging forthree blocks.
Besides, Mrs.
Clinton asked us not to let youinto any more fast food places.
SPEAKER_02 (23:49):
Well, I just want to
mingle with the American people,
talk with some real folks, maybeget a diet coke or something.
But please, don't tell Mrs.
Clinton.
Jim, let me tell you something.
There's gonna be a whole bunchof things we don't tell, Mrs.
Clinton.
Fast food is the latest of ourwords.
(24:16):
How are you?
Oh, that's an adorable.
That means African princess,doesn't it?
She certainly is beautifulenough to be a princess.
So you're gonna finish thesefries.
(24:38):
Well, if you're not gonna eatthem.
Oh, good to meet you.
How are we doing over here?
Not too shadowy.
SPEAKER_15 (24:55):
Chris Farley.
Kevin Nealin is in the skin,too.
SPEAKER_02 (24:58):
So you own your own
hardware store, huh?
Yes, sir.
1972.
Well, good for you.
You know, we want to create anetwork of community development
banks to lend money to smallbusinesses like yourself.
I said your boy doesn't like thepickles.
Come on.
(25:21):
I'm gonna wake up every morningthinking about you.
SPEAKER_14 (25:28):
Hi, Mr.
President.
I'm Kevin O'Brien, manager thismorning.
I just want to thank you forstopping by.
SPEAKER_15 (25:33):
Tom Arnold.
SPEAKER_14 (25:35):
Well, thank you,
Kevin.
SPEAKER_02 (25:36):
You got a real
American family place here.
Is it too late for NateMcMuffin?
SPEAKER_14 (25:40):
Well, normally we
stop serving breakfast at 11,
but for you.
Thanks so much.
Hey, should I scare up some ofthe big greasy sausage patties
you like?
You read my mind.
Okay.
SPEAKER_15 (25:50):
I want to play.
I want to talk more about him onthe show tonight.
One of my favorites, just for abit.
I just gotta do it.
Got to, I have to do it.
Phil Harbin, unfrozen cavemanlawyer.
SPEAKER_01 (26:05):
One hundred thousand
years ago, a caveman was out
hunting on the frozen wasteswhen he slipped and fell into a
crevasse.
In 1988, he was discovered bysome scientists and thawed out.
He then went to law school andbecame Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer.
SPEAKER_13 (26:25):
He used to be a
caveman, but now he's a lawyer.
Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer.
SPEAKER_01 (26:38):
Brought to you by
Gas Plus, actually gives you gas
for those times when you feellike being the Joker.
And by National Escort Service,if we don't get a prostitute to
your door within 15 minutes, youdon't pay.
And by Happy Fun Ball, stilllegal in 16 states, it's happy,
(26:59):
it's fun, it's happy fun ball.
And now, tonight's episode ofUnfrozen Caveman Lawyer.
SPEAKER_06 (27:09):
Mr.
Key Rock, are you ready to giveyour summation?
SPEAKER_03 (27:14):
It's just Key Rock,
Your Honor, and yes, I'm ready.
Thank you.
Ladies and gentlemen of thejury, I'm just a caveman.
I fell in some ice and later gotthought out by some of your
scientists.
Your world frightens andconfuses me.
(27:36):
Sometimes the honking horns ofyour traffic make me want to get
out of my BMW and run off intothe hills or whatever.
Sometimes when I get a messageon my fax machine, I wonder, did
little demons get inside andtype it?
I don't know.
(27:57):
My primitive mind can't graspthese concepts.
But there is one thing I doknow.
When a man, like my client,slips and falls on a sidewalk in
front of a public library, thenhe is entitled to no less than
(28:18):
two million dollars incompensatory damages.
And two million dollars inpunitive damages.
Thank you.
SPEAKER_00 (28:36):
Kerock's words are
just as true now as they were in
his time.
We give him the full amount.
SPEAKER_01 (28:45):
This has been
Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer.
Join us next week for anotherepisode.
SPEAKER_15 (28:51):
I just love the
whole premise of it.
Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer.
The great Phil Hartman.
We'll talk about him on the onthe show tonight.
The Pat Walsh show.
And we're going to finish thingsoff today, not with a record,
but Cecilia, listener content.
The fabulous Cecilia, who welove.
Hi, Cecilia.
(29:12):
Thank you for listening.
We love ya.
Who pointed out to me, and I Idon't know how I did not know
this, but I didn't.
But thanks to Cecilia, who isalways sending me incredible
content.
Cecilia um sends me this.
This is well, I'll tell you, Idon't know which band
necessarily this is.
(29:34):
But this is Mick Jagger'sbrother, Chris Jagger.
Did you know he had a band?
Did you know he had a band?
I know he's got a couple ofthem.
One is called um Slim Chance.
There's and there's a the ChrisJagger trio.
Anyone know about this?
So here is Chris Jagger.
(29:55):
Let's take a listen.
Real tin and ox with lap Waitingin line for a jab And if in the
morning I don't feel so bright Ireckon that is singing about
waiting in line for a jab Shetalking about Waiting in line
(30:18):
for a jab Real tin an ox withlap Waiting in line for a jab
And if in the morning I don'tfeel so bright I reckon that is
gonna be worth What I reckonit's gonna be worth the fight I
(30:41):
don't know what he was singingabout W here's Chris Jagger
Let's listen to this let'slisten to this Chris Jagger It's
kinda kinda like a cage like aZydeco feel What come on this
can't be his brother is it thecity has its sights but the
(31:08):
country has far more I lost youshed Say what are you waiting
for?
Ah wow finish up your drink comealong with me where the rocks
run down into the silver sea thetide is arriving in there you go
Chris Jagger let's knock ontrain doing like Zydeco or Cajun
(31:36):
French now you speak in Frenchlike Cajun music down the sand
well have a great Friday alrighthey I can feel my lips again
that means I can do my radioshow tonight have a great day
have a great week support localbusiness thank you for listening
(32:00):
to That Speeps