Tired of people calling 17 syllables “genius”? So am I.
In this brutally honest, occasionally unhinged episode of Perfectly Poetic, Allen Mowery finally unleashes his pent-up frustration about the most overrated poetic form of all time: the haiku. From childhood worksheet trauma to seasonal name-dropping, syllable policing, AI-generated nonsense, and the myth of Bashō's frog — no stone (or smooth river pebble) is left unskipped.
Prepare yourself for frogs, fury, and the poetic equivalent of vending machine sushi.
Spoiler: There’s a haiku at the end. And it’s not about coffee.
What We Cover in This Episode:
Why your third-grade haiku assignment was emotional sabotage
The true history of haiku (and how we butchered it)
Bashō’s frog poem — misunderstood or overhyped?
The tyranny of 5-7-5 and the myth of morae
Why “deep” isn’t the same as “short”
Haikus on dating profiles, bumper stickers, and coffee shop chalkboards
Allen’s Haiku Manifesto for the modern world
AI haikus vs. human ones: can you tell the difference?
A few delightfully petty haikus written out of spite
Why we should demand more from poetry — and ourselves
Quote from the Episode:
“A haiku is not profound just because it’s small. It’s not a bonsai tree — it’s usually just a dead branch with a filter on it.”
Mentioned or Referenced:
Matsuo Bashō
Nick Virgilio
Jack Kerouac
3rd grade teachers everywhere
Haiku bots (yes, they’re real and yes, they’re terrifying)
Connect with the Show:
🌐 Website: perfectlypoetic.com
📸 Instagram: @perfectlypoeticpodcast
📬 Email: poetic@perfectlypoetic.com
📺 YouTube: @perfectlypoeticpodcast
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