May 26, 2025 • 23 mins
In this episode of Personal Mastery, Jerry Henderson explores why only 8% of people achieve their goals. He also introduces the "10-10 Rule," a principle that involves dedicating level 10 effort to tasks that have the potential to yield level 10 results.
Jerry shares how high achievers like Warren Buffett, Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Tim Ferriss, and Serena Williams exemplify this rule by focusing intensely on high-impact activities and eliminating low-return tasks.
He also provides a step-by-step guide to applying the 10-10 Rule in your own life to enhance productivity and achieve meaningful goals.
If you’ve ever felt stuck, burned out, or like you’re working hard without getting ahead, this episode will show you the one mindset shift and strategy that the top 8% of achievers use to build sustainable success.
Key Takeaways
- The 10-10 Rule: Allocate maximum effort only to tasks that promise maximum returns.
- Focus Over Busyness: High achievers prioritize impactful activities over being merely busy.
- Cognitive Load Theory: Our brains have limited capacity; overloading with low-impact tasks leads to burnout .
- Goal Dilution Effect: Pursuing too many goals simultaneously can weaken the effectiveness of each .
- Strategic No: Saying no to low-return tasks creates space for high-impact work.
Chapters:
00:00 Intro – Why 92% of people fail to achieve their goals
01:02 The one habit that shows up in the top 8%
02:36 Buffett, Jobs, and the power of ruthless focus
03:32 The dopamine trap and the illusion of busyness
05:07 Cognitive Load Theory and why your brain is overwhelmed
06:33 Giving level 10 effort to level 3 returns
07:35 Burnout, misaligned effort, and the cost of doing too much
08:08 The Pareto Principle and how to use it with the 10-10 Rule
09:06 Learning to say no: Buffett, Jobs, Oprah, and the mindset shift
13:05 How Tim Ferriss, Serena Williams, and top performers guard their energy
13:57 What all top achievers understand about focus and results
15:28 The 4-step framework for applying the 10-10 Rule
21:54 Bonus Tip: Using the 10-10 Rule to evaluate your relationships
I am grateful you are here,
Jerry
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Jerry Henderson (00:00):
92% of people will never achieve their goals.
That's not a motivational quote, it's a real stat, and I wanted
to know what makes the 8% ofpeople who do achieve their
goals different.
So I spent months studying themand I found one thing, one
habit that showed up everysingle time, and today, in this
(00:23):
episode, I'm going to shareexactly what that habit is.
Hello, everybody, and welcometo Personal Mastery.
I'm your host, jerry Henderson,and if you're ready to create a
life that feels as good on theinside as it looks on the
outside, you're in the rightplace.
Let's get started.
Let's get started Now if you'renew here.
(00:50):
I'm Jerry.
I'm trained in psychology andhuman behavior at Harvard
University and I'm the creatorof the Personal Mastery
Framework, and every week, Ishare science-based tools to
help people build a life thatfeels as good on the inside as
it looks on the outside.
Now, one thing I've alwaysbelieved is that success isn't
just about talent and it's notjust about working harder.
It's about working smarter.
And when I really startedlooking into what separates the
(01:13):
top 8% achievers from everybodyelse, I kept seeing the same
pattern.
It's not simply about doingmore and more.
It's about focusing all of youreffort on what actually moves
the needle, and I call what Ifound the 10-10 rule, and today
I'm going to show you how toapply it in your own life and
what the research shows us onthis and there's actually an
(01:35):
article on this in the Journalof Clinical Psychology.
It clearly shows us that only8% of people follow through on
their goals after a full year,let alone over the long haul.
So what do the 8% dodifferently than the 94%?
What does the research show us?
And then even a level abovethat, what do people like Warren
(01:55):
Buffett, oprah Winfrey, steveJobs, serena Williams what do
they do differently?
So, for example, why did WarrenBuffett reportedly advise his
pilot to write down his top 25goals and then to focus only on
the top five and intentionallyand purposefully ignore the
(02:16):
other 20?
And why did Steve Jobs, when hereturned to Apple, why did he
decide to cut the product linefrom 350 products down to just
10?
, which was a key decision thathelped completely turn the
company around and is a big partof why Apple is what Apple is
today.
(02:36):
What each one of theseindividuals were doing, and what
the top 8% of people do whoactually achieve their goals, is
they were intentionallychoosing to practice what I call
, once again, the 10-10 rule,and this is one of the key
things that I found that highperformers, high achievers, do
intentionally and repeatedly.
(02:56):
They eliminate things thatdon't have the potential to
bring the highest return.
They narrow their focus, andthis is what many people miss.
This is what the 92% of peoplemiss.
They set a lot of goals andthey get really busy and they
confuse busyness with progress.
(03:18):
I mean, we've all been there,right?
Because this is our kind ofdefault mode that we go into.
This is our kind of defaultmode that we go into, and it
takes discipline and it takesfocus to narrow ourselves down
and to not confuse busyness withprogress.
And this is really a big part ofhow our brain is wired.
We feel productive when wecheck boxes, but if those tasks
(03:39):
aren't connected to highleverage outcomes, they're
simply distractions in disguise,and what is the result?
Exhaustion, burnout, all of itwithout any real progress to the
life that we actually want tocreate.
Instead of creating and livingthat life, we get trapped in
this dopamine cycle.
You see, our brain getsdopamine hits from completing
(04:02):
these easy tasks, but whatseparates the 8% that I
researched is that they'velearned to delay gratification.
They resist that natural urgeto just feel like they're being
productive and they actuallyfocus in on the things that
create exponential returns.
And this intentional focus isleveraging what is known as the
(04:26):
cognitive load theory, and thecore idea behind cognitive load
is the concept that the brainhas limited bandwidth for
processing and making decisions,and people who achieve great
things with their life theyunderstand this and they haven't
fragmented themselves to ahundred different things and
they don't get trapped in theillusion of busyness equaling
(04:50):
progress.
And here's the important thingto understand about this is that
when you give high effort tolow return goals, you're
depleting your mental bandwidththat could be going to strategic
, meaningful action thatactually moves the needle.
So how do we get out of thattrap, out of that loop, and what
is the 10-10 rule?
(05:11):
Well, it's very simple Onlygive level 10 effort to things
that have the potential to giveyou a level 10 result or return.
Because what's happening formost people is they're giving
all of this effort to all ofthese different things, and
sometimes they're giving a level10 effort to something that
(05:33):
only can produce a level threereturn and they find themselves
wondering why am I not makingprogress?
Why am I not being successful?
Well, you've got so many thingsthat you're doing that you
don't actually have capacity togive level 10 effort to all of
those things.
So what happens is you give alevel six here, a level seven
here, and then all of a sudden,you start to feel frustrated and
(05:55):
you don't feel like you'reproductive.
You're spinning your wheels andthen you'll start giving a
level 10 effort to things thatonly have a level three return
because it feels easier.
You get this false sense ofpayoff.
That's why you might spendhours cleaning out the closet to
avoid some of the harder workthat you feel like you need to
do, where you get lost intweaking the website to make it
just right, or you're divinginto that inbox and you're
(06:17):
trying to clear it out.
So you have this sense ofsatisfaction of progress.
But the reality is those thingsare only going to give us a
level three return, and whenwe're giving a level 10 effort
to those things, it's no wonderthat we're not making progress.
And this is exactly what startsto separate the people who are
(06:38):
in that 8%, because what theyhave realized is that they need
to give a level 10 effort to thethings that have the potential
to give them a level 10 result.
And that's also how you buildsustainable success for the long
haul.
Right?
Because if we're out heregiving all of this effort to
different things and we're notseeing results, we start to burn
(07:01):
out.
Because burnout isn't about theamount of work we're doing
always right, there's not adirect correlation to that.
Always it's about the way thatwe're doing the work, the energy
that we're putting towards thework.
And so if we're doing all ofthis busy work and we have all
this activity and we're notgetting any rewards from it
because we're not seeing a lotof progress happen, we start to
(07:22):
get frustrated, we start to getdisheartened, we start to lose
hope and then we're on the pathtowards burnout.
And what the 8% have done isthat they've understood that
it's not just about workingharder, but it's about choosing
wisely where your best effortgoes, because, remember, your
brain is built for focus, notmultitasking.
(07:46):
Multitasking is an illusion.
And what the 10-10 rule does isit helps you work with your
biology, not against it.
And what the 10-10 rule alsodoes is it helps you leverage
the Pareto principle.
What is that?
What's the principle thatyou've probably heard of that
80% of your results come from20% of your efforts.
(08:08):
One of the challenge for manypeople is trying to figure out
where do they need to put the20% of their effort, and this
10-10 rule can help you makethose choices, because the truth
is not all goals or tasks arecreated equally.
You're going to want to findthe few that give you the most
exponential return and figureout how to go all in on those.
(08:33):
What the 10-10 rule also doesis it leverages what is known as
opportunity cost, because thetruth is, every time you say yes
to a low return goal, you'reactually saying no to something
that could change absolutelyeverything in your life, and
that's the hidden cost.
Right, that's the opportunitycost, because what's happening
(08:53):
is your best effort is beingwasted in the wrong places, and
when that's happening, we don'thave the energy or the capacity
to put our effort towards thethings that really matter.
So let's talk a little bit moreabout some of these individuals
that I looked at through theresearch, and we'll start with
Warren Buffett.
I love this quote from him.
He says the difference betweensuccessful people and really
(09:17):
successful people is that thereally successful people say no
to almost everything.
See, here's one of themisconceptions that people often
have about very successfulpeople that they're like
constantly frantically busydoing all of these things.
It's not true.
They've learned to say yes tothe right things.
Now there's a lot ofinformation out there on the
(09:38):
internet about you got to haveseven streams of income in order
to be a millionaire.
That's a fallacy in thebeginning for sure, because what
the most successful people didis they figured out how to make
one thing work really well, tobuild wealth off of one thing,
and then they expanded throughinvestments, etc.
But they first started with howdo I do one thing extremely
(10:03):
well, as Buffett said, how do Isay no to almost everything?
So I have capacity to say yesto the right things.
Now let's circle back to SteveJobs.
He had a ruthless focus atApple, and here's one of his
quotes that he's so famouslyknown for saying.
He said I'm as proud of thethings we haven't done here at
(10:24):
Apple as the things that we havedone.
And this is a key mind shiftthat people have to step into
right, because for many people,they get more anxiety around the
things that they say no to thanthe things that they say yes to
, and their nervous system getswired to have anxiety around
saying no whether it's peoplepleasing or a lack of clarity,
(10:45):
et cetera but they've learned tosay yes out of a fear of saying
no, and it could be around FOMOand other things like that.
But here's the thing that 8% do.
It's going to be important foryou to do if you want to be a
part of that 8% who know how tohave success.
You're going to have to ridethat anxiety wave of saying no.
Get through it, rewire yournervous system and allow
(11:09):
yourself to focus in on thethings that you truly should be
saying yes to.
Let's talk about Oprah Winfreyand her concept of saying no to
misaligned yeses.
She has clearly stated that shehas learned to live her life in
a way that allows her todistinguish between what I want
to do and what I feel like I'mobligated to do.
(11:32):
You might be thinking toyourself well, that's Oprah
Winfrey.
She's at that level.
She can distinguish betweenthose things I can't.
But here's the thing I want topoint out what do you think
actually got Oprah Winfrey tothat place where she could have
that type of freedom?
It's the exact type of thinkingaround learning to distinguish
what she wanted to do from whatshe was obligated to do and
(11:56):
moved herself towards that.
You see, what we can't do issit around and say to ourselves
well, when I get to that level,then I can make those type of
decisions and say yes to thethings I want and no to the
things I don't want.
No, it's not about arriving tothat place, it's about creating
that place, and the way that wecreate it is by saying no to the
(12:17):
things that we're simply doingout of obligation and moving our
life more and more towardssaying yes to the things that we
actually want to do andfollowing a 10-10 rule.
That can help us build the lifethat allows us to have that
type of freedom.
And Oprah admits that she hadto learn how to do this and that
she used to say yes to everyoneand everything.
(12:40):
And what happened was itdrained her and what she started
to do was intentionally connectwith what her deepest sense of
purpose was and then begin toalign her life with that sense
of purpose.
And that shift in thinking wasactually the catalyst that
allowed her to start giving herbest to what really matters.
And then those decisionsstarted to compound and is what
(13:03):
created the life that Oprah hastoday.
Let's talk about Tim Ferriss.
In his book the 4-Hour Workweek, he talks about how he
intentionally and ruthlessly cutout 80% of his tasks that
brought him little return.
And what he did was he focusedall that energy on only the 20%
(13:24):
of things that actually broughthim a meaningful return 20% of
things that actually brought hima meaningful return.
Another example is SerenaWilliams, who intentionally
structured her life to protectand to guard her energy, and she
did this so she could give herfocus to being an elite
performer and she would turndown endorsements.
She turned down parties.
She even turned down mediaappearances so that she could
(13:46):
focus in on that one thing thatshe could be the on that one
thing that she could be the bestat, the most elite at, and she
attributes so much of hersuccess and her capacity to be
able to say no.
Now, all of these individualsthat we've been discussing,
which are just a handful of thepeople that I've studied, they
were practicing the art and thescience of the 10-10 rule.
(14:07):
Seen the art and the science ofthe 10-10 rule, learning to get
clear on what could give them alevel 10 result, getting rid of
things that wouldn't give themthat, so that they had the
energy to give those level 10opportunities a level 10 energy
to give it their best, becausethey knew that that had the
potential to change their lives.
(14:28):
I want to take a moment and Iwant to share something with you
.
If you're struggling to getclear on your goals or you feel
like you're working hard butyou're not getting the results
that you want to see, I'd loveto come alongside you in that
journey and help, and that'sexactly why I created the
Personal Mastery CoachingProgram.
It's a one-on-one coachingprogram that's built for high
(14:48):
achievers, high performers whowant sustainable success without
sacrificing their overallwell-being.
The program uses sixevidence-based pillars that are
rooted in psychology andneuroscience that help you align
your inner life with your outerresults, so that you can create
(15:08):
a life that feels as good onthe inside as it looks on the
outside.
To learn more about the program, you can simply check out the
show notes in this episode.
There'll be a link there.
We can set up a free strategycall and we can connect to see
if working together is the rightfit, or you can simply go to my
website at jerryhendersonorg.
All right, now let's starttalking about how do you apply
(15:32):
this 10-10 rule.
I'm going to give you foursimple steps to make that happen
.
Number one Audit your goals.
How many goals do you have onyour list right now?
Remember the Pareto principleright, that 80% of your results
are going to be coming from 20%of your efforts.
And as you look at that list,if you've got a list of like 10,
(15:53):
12, 15 things, can I encourageyou to reconsider that, that
that might just be too many.
You see, the research shows usthat we can only effectively
focus in on two to three at atime, and this is why people
fail at 92%.
That's why they fail atachieving their goals because
they've got too many.
(16:14):
So take a moment and audit yourgoals and look at them and ask
yourself the question which oneof those goals would have the
biggest leverage point in yourlife to create change, and focus
in on that.
You see, when we have too manygoals, as I said before, we're
going to burn ourselves out andwe wind up not accomplishing any
(16:34):
of our goals and we'refrustrated and we're wondering
why am I still in the same placethis year as I was last year?
One of the key things is youhave too many goals Now, another
consequence of having too manygoals is what is known as the
goal dilution effect, and thiscomes from social psychology
that the research shows thatwhen we have too many goals, not
(16:55):
only are we ineffectivelysplitting our time, we're also
weakening our power.
Well, what do I mean by that?
Well, the research shows thatwhen we appear to be spread too
thin, it makes other peopletrust your abilities less.
I know it sounds strange, right?
We think that if we can take ona lot, that people will trust
(17:15):
our capacity to get things done.
It's not about the number ofthings that you're getting done,
it's the effectiveness of howyou're getting those things done
.
And when you have too manythings on your plate, you're
actually weakening your powerand people begin to
psychologically question yourability to get those things done
, and then their overall trustin your abilities begins to
(17:37):
diminish.
Now the second step of the 10-10rule is to audit your output.
Take a look at where yourenergy is going daily, weekly,
monthly.
Where are you spending all ofyour effort?
Take a hard and honest look atyour calendar, your to-do list,
your mental space.
Where's all your energy going?
(17:57):
Because, remember, cognitivepsychology tells us that your
mental bandwidth is limited andif you're spending most of your
energy managing emails, managingchaos, doing busy work.
Your real goals never get theoxygen they need because it's
being sucked up by all of theseother things in your life.
Here's the thing that's reallyimportant about this energy
(18:18):
audit, because what we're tryingto do is we're trying to find
places where we can free upenergy so that we can have
capacity to give that energytowards the things that really
matter.
Now, once we've done that, we'regoing to move into step three,
and step three is so importantbecause this is where we start
to get laser focused on whatwe're going to start putting a
(18:41):
level 10 effort towards.
So look at your list of goalsand score it.
If you got 10 on here or yougot five on there, whatever it
is, look at those goals, scorethem.
Some things are going toprobably max out at a three or
four return for you and, as youdid your energy audit, you might
be seeing that you're giving alevel 10 effort towards that
(19:02):
thing, but it only has thepotential to give you a level
three or four return, and thehope is that there's going to be
things on that list that are alevel 10 for you, that they have
the possibility to be a level10 return for you.
Now, if you can't find anythingon that list that's a level 10
return for you, can I invite youto start thinking a little bit
(19:24):
bigger about your goals.
If everything feels like, eh,it could be a six, it could be a
five or maybe it's a seven, canI challenge you to start
thinking about what you wouldput on that list that could be
transformational for you, thatcould give you a level 10 result
, because we all need things onour goal list that actually have
(19:45):
the power to transform ourlives.
So take a look at that list,score them.
This has the potential for alevel three, this has potential
for a level five, and some aregoing to be a level 10.
And then, once we identifythose level 10s, we start to
really see the things that wewant to put energy to.
We then move into step four,which is we start to reallocate
(20:07):
our energy.
We start making the harddecision of pulling our energy
away from the threes, the fours,the fives, and we start to
redirect them towards the 10s.
Now, if you've got a bunch ofstories that start to kick off
in your head as to why you can'tget rid of that level three, or
why you can't pull your energyback.
Can I ask you the question isthat true?
(20:28):
Is it really true that youcan't pull your energy away from
that and put it towards thething that could actually
transform your life?
Do you feel obligated to it?
Have you said yes to it whenyou should have said no to it?
Whatever the story is, it'sjust a story and you can begin
to pull your energy away from it.
And if you start to think well,I don't want to hurt the
(20:49):
person's feeling, I don't wantto Think about Oprah, where she
said I had to pull my energyaway from the things I didn't
want to do that I just simplyfelt obligated to do and I had
to start shifting it towards thethings that I truly wanted to
do, that aligned with my purpose.
You see, our level 10s should bealigned with our purpose.
And when you have it alignedwith your purpose, you'll start
(21:12):
to find passion to give it alevel 10 effort and the other
things that are those level 3sand 4s.
You'll find yourself naturallystarting to let go of them
because they're not aligned withyour purpose.
And here's the beautiful thingabout this 10-10 rule when you
start to practice it and youstart to live like that 8% who
actually get their goals done,you're going to find yourself
(21:35):
doing fewer things but with amuch bigger impact, and I don't
know about you, but that feelsso much like the life that I
want to live.
That feels like a life thatfeels as good on the inside, not
so frantic, not so stressed,not so anxiety driven and it
starts to truly feel like a lifethat I want to create.
Now here's a bonus tip for youon using this 10-10 rule.
(21:58):
You can also use it in yourrelationships.
Take a list of yourrelationships which ones are the
most life-giving, where you'regetting a level 10 return from,
and then put a level 10 effortinto those relationships,
because what happens for so manyof us is we wind up putting a
level 10 effort intorelationships that are only
giving us a level three or alevel four return or worse,
(22:22):
they're actually a negativereturn for us.
And so take that same type ofaudit mentality, apply that to
your relationships, and that cantotally transform your
relationships as well by usingthis 10-10 rule.
So here's a mirror moment foryou after going through those
steps, or thinking about thosesteps, processing that.
Ask yourself, where are yougiving a level 10 effort to
(22:47):
something that will never giveyou a level 10 life?
And then ask yourself whatwould happen if you stopped
giving a level 10 effort towardsthat?
And then ask yourself the nextquestion what would happen if
you gave your best efforttowards the things that could
give you that level 10 life?
Because honestly, on a personalnote, applying this 10-10 rule
(23:09):
to my life and the things that Ihave learned from my research
has completely changed my life,and I know it'll change your
life as well, and I want toremind you that you are worthy
of a life that feels as good onthe inside as it looks on the
outside.
92% of people will never achieve their goals.
That's not a motivational quote, it's a real stat, and I wanted
to know what makes the 8% ofpeople who do achieve their
goals different.
So I spent months studying themand I found one thing, one
habit that showed up everysingle time, and today, in this
(00:23):
episode, I'm going to shareexactly what that habit is.
Hello, everybody, and welcometo Personal Mastery.
I'm your host, jerry Henderson,and if you're ready to create a
life that feels as good on theinside as it looks on the
outside, you're in the rightplace.
Let's get started.
Let's get started Now if you'renew here.
(00:50):
I'm Jerry.
I'm trained in psychology andhuman behavior at Harvard
University and I'm the creatorof the Personal Mastery
Framework, and every week, Ishare science-based tools to
help people build a life thatfeels as good on the inside as
it looks on the outside.
Now, one thing I've alwaysbelieved is that success isn't
just about talent and it's notjust about working harder.
It's about working smarter.
And when I really startedlooking into what separates the
(01:13):
top 8% achievers from everybodyelse, I kept seeing the same
pattern.
It's not simply about doingmore and more.
It's about focusing all of youreffort on what actually moves
the needle, and I call what Ifound the 10-10 rule, and today
I'm going to show you how toapply it in your own life and
what the research shows us onthis and there's actually an
(01:35):
article on this in the Journalof Clinical Psychology.
It clearly shows us that only8% of people follow through on
their goals after a full year,let alone over the long haul.
So what do the 8% dodifferently than the 94%?
What does the research show us?
And then even a level abovethat, what do people like Warren
(01:55):
Buffett, oprah Winfrey, steveJobs, serena Williams what do
they do differently?
So, for example, why did WarrenBuffett reportedly advise his
pilot to write down his top 25goals and then to focus only on
the top five and intentionallyand purposefully ignore the
(02:16):
other 20?
And why did Steve Jobs, when hereturned to Apple, why did he
decide to cut the product linefrom 350 products down to just
10?
, which was a key decision thathelped completely turn the
company around and is a big partof why Apple is what Apple is
today.
(02:36):
What each one of theseindividuals were doing, and what
the top 8% of people do whoactually achieve their goals, is
they were intentionallychoosing to practice what I call
, once again, the 10-10 rule,and this is one of the key
things that I found that highperformers, high achievers, do
intentionally and repeatedly.
(02:56):
They eliminate things thatdon't have the potential to
bring the highest return.
They narrow their focus, andthis is what many people miss.
This is what the 92% of peoplemiss.
They set a lot of goals andthey get really busy and they
confuse busyness with progress.
(03:18):
I mean, we've all been there,right?
Because this is our kind ofdefault mode that we go into.
This is our kind of defaultmode that we go into, and it
takes discipline and it takesfocus to narrow ourselves down
and to not confuse busyness withprogress.
And this is really a big part ofhow our brain is wired.
We feel productive when wecheck boxes, but if those tasks
(03:39):
aren't connected to highleverage outcomes, they're
simply distractions in disguise,and what is the result?
Exhaustion, burnout, all of itwithout any real progress to the
life that we actually want tocreate.
Instead of creating and livingthat life, we get trapped in
this dopamine cycle.
You see, our brain getsdopamine hits from completing
(04:02):
these easy tasks, but whatseparates the 8% that I
researched is that they'velearned to delay gratification.
They resist that natural urgeto just feel like they're being
productive and they actuallyfocus in on the things that
create exponential returns.
And this intentional focus isleveraging what is known as the
(04:26):
cognitive load theory, and thecore idea behind cognitive load
is the concept that the brainhas limited bandwidth for
processing and making decisions,and people who achieve great
things with their life theyunderstand this and they haven't
fragmented themselves to ahundred different things and
they don't get trapped in theillusion of busyness equaling
(04:50):
progress.
And here's the important thingto understand about this is that
when you give high effort tolow return goals, you're
depleting your mental bandwidththat could be going to strategic
, meaningful action thatactually moves the needle.
So how do we get out of thattrap, out of that loop, and what
is the 10-10 rule?
(05:11):
Well, it's very simple Onlygive level 10 effort to things
that have the potential to giveyou a level 10 result or return.
Because what's happening formost people is they're giving
all of this effort to all ofthese different things, and
sometimes they're giving a level10 effort to something that
(05:33):
only can produce a level threereturn and they find themselves
wondering why am I not makingprogress?
Why am I not being successful?
Well, you've got so many thingsthat you're doing that you
don't actually have capacity togive level 10 effort to all of
those things.
So what happens is you give alevel six here, a level seven
here, and then all of a sudden,you start to feel frustrated and
(05:55):
you don't feel like you'reproductive.
You're spinning your wheels andthen you'll start giving a
level 10 effort to things thatonly have a level three return
because it feels easier.
You get this false sense ofpayoff.
That's why you might spendhours cleaning out the closet to
avoid some of the harder workthat you feel like you need to
do, where you get lost intweaking the website to make it
just right, or you're divinginto that inbox and you're
(06:17):
trying to clear it out.
So you have this sense ofsatisfaction of progress.
But the reality is those thingsare only going to give us a
level three return, and whenwe're giving a level 10 effort
to those things, it's no wonderthat we're not making progress.
And this is exactly what startsto separate the people who are
(06:38):
in that 8%, because what theyhave realized is that they need
to give a level 10 effort to thethings that have the potential
to give them a level 10 result.
And that's also how you buildsustainable success for the long
haul.
Right?
Because if we're out heregiving all of this effort to
different things and we're notseeing results, we start to burn
(07:01):
out.
Because burnout isn't about theamount of work we're doing
always right, there's not adirect correlation to that.
Always it's about the way thatwe're doing the work, the energy
that we're putting towards thework.
And so if we're doing all ofthis busy work and we have all
this activity and we're notgetting any rewards from it
because we're not seeing a lotof progress happen, we start to
(07:22):
get frustrated, we start to getdisheartened, we start to lose
hope and then we're on the pathtowards burnout.
And what the 8% have done isthat they've understood that
it's not just about workingharder, but it's about choosing
wisely where your best effortgoes, because, remember, your
brain is built for focus, notmultitasking.
(07:46):
Multitasking is an illusion.
And what the 10-10 rule does isit helps you work with your
biology, not against it.
And what the 10-10 rule alsodoes is it helps you leverage
the Pareto principle.
What is that?
What's the principle thatyou've probably heard of that
80% of your results come from20% of your efforts.
(08:08):
One of the challenge for manypeople is trying to figure out
where do they need to put the20% of their effort, and this
10-10 rule can help you makethose choices, because the truth
is not all goals or tasks arecreated equally.
You're going to want to findthe few that give you the most
exponential return and figureout how to go all in on those.
(08:33):
What the 10-10 rule also doesis it leverages what is known as
opportunity cost, because thetruth is, every time you say yes
to a low return goal, you'reactually saying no to something
that could change absolutelyeverything in your life, and
that's the hidden cost.
Right, that's the opportunitycost, because what's happening
(08:53):
is your best effort is beingwasted in the wrong places, and
when that's happening, we don'thave the energy or the capacity
to put our effort towards thethings that really matter.
So let's talk a little bit moreabout some of these individuals
that I looked at through theresearch, and we'll start with
Warren Buffett.
I love this quote from him.
He says the difference betweensuccessful people and really
(09:17):
successful people is that thereally successful people say no
to almost everything.
See, here's one of themisconceptions that people often
have about very successfulpeople that they're like
constantly frantically busydoing all of these things.
It's not true.
They've learned to say yes tothe right things.
Now there's a lot ofinformation out there on the
(09:38):
internet about you got to haveseven streams of income in order
to be a millionaire.
That's a fallacy in thebeginning for sure, because what
the most successful people didis they figured out how to make
one thing work really well, tobuild wealth off of one thing,
and then they expanded throughinvestments, etc.
But they first started with howdo I do one thing extremely
(10:03):
well, as Buffett said, how do Isay no to almost everything?
So I have capacity to say yesto the right things.
Now let's circle back to SteveJobs.
He had a ruthless focus atApple, and here's one of his
quotes that he's so famouslyknown for saying.
He said I'm as proud of thethings we haven't done here at
(10:24):
Apple as the things that we havedone.
And this is a key mind shiftthat people have to step into
right, because for many people,they get more anxiety around the
things that they say no to thanthe things that they say yes to
, and their nervous system getswired to have anxiety around
saying no whether it's peoplepleasing or a lack of clarity,
(10:45):
et cetera but they've learned tosay yes out of a fear of saying
no, and it could be around FOMOand other things like that.
But here's the thing that 8% do.
It's going to be important foryou to do if you want to be a
part of that 8% who know how tohave success.
You're going to have to ridethat anxiety wave of saying no.
Get through it, rewire yournervous system and allow
(11:09):
yourself to focus in on thethings that you truly should be
saying yes to.
Let's talk about Oprah Winfreyand her concept of saying no to
misaligned yeses.
She has clearly stated that shehas learned to live her life in
a way that allows her todistinguish between what I want
to do and what I feel like I'mobligated to do.
(11:32):
You might be thinking toyourself well, that's Oprah
Winfrey.
She's at that level.
She can distinguish betweenthose things I can't.
But here's the thing I want topoint out what do you think
actually got Oprah Winfrey tothat place where she could have
that type of freedom?
It's the exact type of thinkingaround learning to distinguish
what she wanted to do from whatshe was obligated to do and
(11:56):
moved herself towards that.
You see, what we can't do issit around and say to ourselves
well, when I get to that level,then I can make those type of
decisions and say yes to thethings I want and no to the
things I don't want.
No, it's not about arriving tothat place, it's about creating
that place, and the way that wecreate it is by saying no to the
(12:17):
things that we're simply doingout of obligation and moving our
life more and more towardssaying yes to the things that we
actually want to do andfollowing a 10-10 rule.
That can help us build the lifethat allows us to have that
type of freedom.
And Oprah admits that she hadto learn how to do this and that
she used to say yes to everyoneand everything.
(12:40):
And what happened was itdrained her and what she started
to do was intentionally connectwith what her deepest sense of
purpose was and then begin toalign her life with that sense
of purpose.
And that shift in thinking wasactually the catalyst that
allowed her to start giving herbest to what really matters.
And then those decisionsstarted to compound and is what
(13:03):
created the life that Oprah hastoday.
Let's talk about Tim Ferriss.
In his book the 4-Hour Workweek, he talks about how he
intentionally and ruthlessly cutout 80% of his tasks that
brought him little return.
And what he did was he focusedall that energy on only the 20%
(13:24):
of things that actually broughthim a meaningful return 20% of
things that actually brought hima meaningful return.
Another example is SerenaWilliams, who intentionally
structured her life to protectand to guard her energy, and she
did this so she could give herfocus to being an elite
performer and she would turndown endorsements.
She turned down parties.
She even turned down mediaappearances so that she could
(13:46):
focus in on that one thing thatshe could be the on that one
thing that she could be the bestat, the most elite at, and she
attributes so much of hersuccess and her capacity to be
able to say no.
Now, all of these individualsthat we've been discussing,
which are just a handful of thepeople that I've studied, they
were practicing the art and thescience of the 10-10 rule.
(14:07):
Seen the art and the science ofthe 10-10 rule, learning to get
clear on what could give them alevel 10 result, getting rid of
things that wouldn't give themthat, so that they had the
energy to give those level 10opportunities a level 10 energy
to give it their best, becausethey knew that that had the
potential to change their lives.
(14:28):
I want to take a moment and Iwant to share something with you
.
If you're struggling to getclear on your goals or you feel
like you're working hard butyou're not getting the results
that you want to see, I'd loveto come alongside you in that
journey and help, and that'sexactly why I created the
Personal Mastery CoachingProgram.
It's a one-on-one coachingprogram that's built for high
(14:48):
achievers, high performers whowant sustainable success without
sacrificing their overallwell-being.
The program uses sixevidence-based pillars that are
rooted in psychology andneuroscience that help you align
your inner life with your outerresults, so that you can create
(15:08):
a life that feels as good onthe inside as it looks on the
outside.
To learn more about the program, you can simply check out the
show notes in this episode.
There'll be a link there.
We can set up a free strategycall and we can connect to see
if working together is the rightfit, or you can simply go to my
website at jerryhendersonorg.
All right, now let's starttalking about how do you apply
(15:32):
this 10-10 rule.
I'm going to give you foursimple steps to make that happen
.
Number one Audit your goals.
How many goals do you have onyour list right now?
Remember the Pareto principleright, that 80% of your results
are going to be coming from 20%of your efforts.
And as you look at that list,if you've got a list of like 10,
(15:53):
12, 15 things, can I encourageyou to reconsider that, that
that might just be too many.
You see, the research shows usthat we can only effectively
focus in on two to three at atime, and this is why people
fail at 92%.
That's why they fail atachieving their goals because
they've got too many.
(16:14):
So take a moment and audit yourgoals and look at them and ask
yourself the question which oneof those goals would have the
biggest leverage point in yourlife to create change, and focus
in on that.
You see, when we have too manygoals, as I said before, we're
going to burn ourselves out andwe wind up not accomplishing any
(16:34):
of our goals and we'refrustrated and we're wondering
why am I still in the same placethis year as I was last year?
One of the key things is youhave too many goals Now, another
consequence of having too manygoals is what is known as the
goal dilution effect, and thiscomes from social psychology
that the research shows thatwhen we have too many goals, not
(16:55):
only are we ineffectivelysplitting our time, we're also
weakening our power.
Well, what do I mean by that?
Well, the research shows thatwhen we appear to be spread too
thin, it makes other peopletrust your abilities less.
I know it sounds strange, right?
We think that if we can take ona lot, that people will trust
(17:15):
our capacity to get things done.
It's not about the number ofthings that you're getting done,
it's the effectiveness of howyou're getting those things done
.
And when you have too manythings on your plate, you're
actually weakening your powerand people begin to
psychologically question yourability to get those things done
, and then their overall trustin your abilities begins to
(17:37):
diminish.
Now the second step of the 10-10rule is to audit your output.
Take a look at where yourenergy is going daily, weekly,
monthly.
Where are you spending all ofyour effort?
Take a hard and honest look atyour calendar, your to-do list,
your mental space.
Where's all your energy going?
(17:57):
Because, remember, cognitivepsychology tells us that your
mental bandwidth is limited andif you're spending most of your
energy managing emails, managingchaos, doing busy work.
Your real goals never get theoxygen they need because it's
being sucked up by all of theseother things in your life.
Here's the thing that's reallyimportant about this energy
(18:18):
audit, because what we're tryingto do is we're trying to find
places where we can free upenergy so that we can have
capacity to give that energytowards the things that really
matter.
Now, once we've done that, we'regoing to move into step three,
and step three is so importantbecause this is where we start
to get laser focused on whatwe're going to start putting a
(18:41):
level 10 effort towards.
So look at your list of goalsand score it.
If you got 10 on here or yougot five on there, whatever it
is, look at those goals, scorethem.
Some things are going toprobably max out at a three or
four return for you and, as youdid your energy audit, you might
be seeing that you're giving alevel 10 effort towards that
(19:02):
thing, but it only has thepotential to give you a level
three or four return, and thehope is that there's going to be
things on that list that are alevel 10 for you, that they have
the possibility to be a level10 return for you.
Now, if you can't find anythingon that list that's a level 10
return for you, can I invite youto start thinking a little bit
(19:24):
bigger about your goals.
If everything feels like, eh,it could be a six, it could be a
five or maybe it's a seven, canI challenge you to start
thinking about what you wouldput on that list that could be
transformational for you, thatcould give you a level 10 result
, because we all need things onour goal list that actually have
(19:45):
the power to transform ourlives.
So take a look at that list,score them.
This has the potential for alevel three, this has potential
for a level five, and some aregoing to be a level 10.
And then, once we identifythose level 10s, we start to
really see the things that wewant to put energy to.
We then move into step four,which is we start to reallocate
(20:07):
our energy.
We start making the harddecision of pulling our energy
away from the threes, the fours,the fives, and we start to
redirect them towards the 10s.
Now, if you've got a bunch ofstories that start to kick off
in your head as to why you can'tget rid of that level three, or
why you can't pull your energyback.
Can I ask you the question isthat true?
(20:28):
Is it really true that youcan't pull your energy away from
that and put it towards thething that could actually
transform your life?
Do you feel obligated to it?
Have you said yes to it whenyou should have said no to it?
Whatever the story is, it'sjust a story and you can begin
to pull your energy away from it.
And if you start to think well,I don't want to hurt the
(20:49):
person's feeling, I don't wantto Think about Oprah, where she
said I had to pull my energyaway from the things I didn't
want to do that I just simplyfelt obligated to do and I had
to start shifting it towards thethings that I truly wanted to
do, that aligned with my purpose.
You see, our level 10s should bealigned with our purpose.
And when you have it alignedwith your purpose, you'll start
(21:12):
to find passion to give it alevel 10 effort and the other
things that are those level 3sand 4s.
You'll find yourself naturallystarting to let go of them
because they're not aligned withyour purpose.
And here's the beautiful thingabout this 10-10 rule when you
start to practice it and youstart to live like that 8% who
actually get their goals done,you're going to find yourself
(21:35):
doing fewer things but with amuch bigger impact, and I don't
know about you, but that feelsso much like the life that I
want to live.
That feels like a life thatfeels as good on the inside, not
so frantic, not so stressed,not so anxiety driven and it
starts to truly feel like a lifethat I want to create.
Now here's a bonus tip for youon using this 10-10 rule.
(21:58):
You can also use it in yourrelationships.
Take a list of yourrelationships which ones are the
most life-giving, where you'regetting a level 10 return from,
and then put a level 10 effortinto those relationships,
because what happens for so manyof us is we wind up putting a
level 10 effort intorelationships that are only
giving us a level three or alevel four return or worse,
(22:22):
they're actually a negativereturn for us.
And so take that same type ofaudit mentality, apply that to
your relationships, and that cantotally transform your
relationships as well by usingthis 10-10 rule.
So here's a mirror moment foryou after going through those
steps, or thinking about thosesteps, processing that.
Ask yourself, where are yougiving a level 10 effort to
(22:47):
something that will never giveyou a level 10 life?
And then ask yourself whatwould happen if you stopped
giving a level 10 effort towardsthat?
And then ask yourself the nextquestion what would happen if
you gave your best efforttowards the things that could
give you that level 10 life?
Because honestly, on a personalnote, applying this 10-10 rule
(23:09):
to my life and the things that Ihave learned from my research
has completely changed my life,and I know it'll change your
life as well, and I want toremind you that you are worthy
of a life that feels as good onthe inside as it looks on the
outside.
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