C1-001: They Said I Should Throw You

Join Dungeon Master John, JS (Orbog), Katherine (Callum), Steve (Gheroth), and Josiah (Pough) as they enter the city of Waterdeep.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Hello everybody,
and welcome to the first episodeof Playing Games with Strangers.
I'm your DMM tonight. My name is John.How are you, uh, with me tonight?
I have well, everybody introduceyourself. We'll start with, uh, Catherine.
Hello.
I am Catherine. Nice to meet you.
Do you want us to call youCatherine or Kate on the show?

(00:21):
I will respond to eitherof those things. Or squid.
Squid.
I'll probably call you squid because Ihave gotten used to calling you that on
Facebook.
That's okay. That's what I answer to. So.
And then from strangers and aliensfame, we have Mr. Steve McDonald.
Is that.
Fame or infamy?
Well, it depends on which episode youwanna listen to. Wow. And, and your,

(00:43):
and your, your your crazy Star Wars ideas.
The crazy ones thatactually work. Yeah. Ex.
Except that they don't, but except.
They do.
We will not go there.. Um, we also have, uh,
world famous writer, author,uh, JS Earls on with us.
Hello. Hello. Hello.

(01:05):
Um, and Josiah, you'll have to forgiveme. I don't remember your last name.
You're the person I have had theleast amount interaction with. Yeah.
That's okay. Uh, Josiah Crandall. Um.
Josiah Crandall. Mm-hmm.. Uh,
now some of you may befamiliar with who we are.
Some of you might be first time listeners.
We are all voice actors forSupersonic pod comics. I play, uh,

(01:27):
Nick Foster in the Randoms. Who doeseverybody else play except for Jss?
Jss is a writer.
Uh, I play the Lady vVigilante. I can also speak, uh,
I play The Lady Vigilante.
Lady Ninja.
Lady Ninja . Iplay all different names.
It depends on the episodeyou listen to. Really?
And, uh, I play, um, Mr. Matrix andI've been a rock before too. So.

(01:50):
He, he was in a rock bands fun.
Yeah. I was in a rock band.
Yeah. I also played Multiple rocks.And I also am, uh, what's his name?
Flame Fist Fire. Fist Flame. Something.
Mr. Fire.
Mr. Fire.
We are very good at knowing who we play.
Oh, Steve, Steve knows otherpeople. He's gonna be playing too.

(02:12):
Yeah. You just keeplistening folks. 'cause man,
you're gonna hear me all overthe place. . Yeah.
Someday. .
. I have some singingparts coming up. So be.
Um, and then of course, we all,
we all know that the one and onlyJs Earls is one of the two writers
for the Supersonic pod comics.Yep. Amongst, amongst many,

(02:36):
many other things.
Which is a real, um,it's an original, uh, uh,
shared universe, superhero world thing,
kind of sci-fi and everythingtoo, though, not just,
not really straight upnormal superhero stuff.
So, uh, so the first question is, whatare we doing and why are we doing this?

(02:57):
We're playing, we're gonnaplay some D and d. Uh,
this might happen a few more times overthe course of the next month or so.
Uh, we're doing it. Uh, I personallywas inspired by something that, uh, Mr.
Earls had put onto theSupersonic Facebook group.
If you're not a part of that group,feel free to go in, check out,
join that community. Youcan chat, hang out with us.

(03:18):
We respond to pretty muchanything. Anybody posts in there.
None of us have anylives. Please talk to us.
. Well, especially now, whichbrings us to the why of the question,
. Yeah. Um, uh,
I decided that I wanted todo a actual play podcast,
one as a proof of concept because thereis going to be an R P G podcast coming

(03:39):
to, uh, supersonic Pod comics inthe near future. Woo. Granted,
granted not using the d and d system,
but tonight we'll be usingd and d fifth Edition. Um,
so one proof of concept, but two, uh,
because everybody is in aweird place right now. Uh,
we are in unprecedented times with peoplein my state, which is Washington, uh,

(04:01):
being under a shelter in place order, um,
I'm not sure if everybody else has thatgoing on. Yep. Massachusetts the moment.
Massachusetts, yes. Yep.
Yep. Florida. Yes. Kansas.
Illinois does.
So now more than ever, people arelooking for an escape into entertainment.
And so I figured, hey, you know,

(04:22):
we're a bunch of voice actors and rightnow supersonic pod comics is on hold,
but that doesn't mean that we can't, uh,
put some extracurricular materialout for you to listen to.
And I am a fan of listening to someDungeons and Dragons in podcast form,
so we figured we'd try our hands at it.And, uh, if you like it, let us know.
If you hate it, also let us knowso we know not to make another, uh,

(04:45):
fool of ourselves for anotherepisode, . But, uh,
unless I've got anything else thatneeds to, needs to be added, JSS,
anything I'm missing for supersonicinformation before we dive tonight to
tonight's game?
Um, I don't know. Uh, mainly just, uh,
I can go to supersonic podcomics.com , uh,

(05:09):
to find out a lot more informationabout what we're talking about.
And, uh, you can also check outsome merch links at both the, uh,
Facebook group and thesupersonic pod comics.com,
as well as checking out the Patreon aswell. Any little bit you can do to help.
Support is great. And with that,
let's play some D and D.

(06:30):
All right. So we're gonna start out,we are in the town of water deep.
So, Orba. Yes. . That's awesome.
You are on your ship thatyou have been riding on up.
The Sword Coast has just landed inwater deep. The Sears of your, uh,

(06:52):
of your order have had a visionthat a great darkness is a,
is rising in water deep, and theyhave sent you to investigate.
You are in the docks, uh,departing from your ship.
As you look around, you see a bustlingcity and dogs in the background. .
It's.
Awesome. Sky's shining. Nothing,

(07:14):
obviously nefarious coming before you atthe moment. What would you like to do?
Oh, pretty sky ,uh, I guess walk into town.
All right. Um, youstart walking into town,
you see you're kind of ina, a merchant district.
Uh, lots of trading of goods goingon around you. A couple inns,

(07:39):
street merchants, vendors.
How long have I been on the ship?
Uh, we'll say about two weeks.
Um, they serve food atthe ends too, right?
Correct.
I will go to an end for food. 'causeI want real food, not shipped food.
Okay. You look around and, uh,

(07:59):
you see an inn and younotice the, the name,
the name of the inn on the signis called the Laughing Laia.
.
And as you go into the inn,you notice that there is, it's,
it's actually quite spaciouson the inside. Uh, you,
there's like a dirt flooredcircle in the middle of this inn.

(08:22):
And, uh, people are starting to, uh,people are starting to gather around,
and you're approached by somebody whohas a pad of paper and they're kind of
writing into it, and they're like, sowho are you taking on the fight? Mr. Oh.
Fight.
Yeah. Yeah. The fight. The fightthat's gonna be happening down in the,
down in the, uh, down in the pitthere. Who are you taking on the fight?
You're gonna, you're gonnatake the, uh, the, uh,

(08:46):
newcomer or are you gonnago with the champion? I.
Like the underdog.
You're going with the underdog?All right, I'll put you down.
How much do you want me toput you down for poo? I'll.
Do two gold pieces.
Two gold pieces for, for thenewcomer. Alright, here. All right.
So go ahead and mark twogold pieces off on your, uh,

(09:06):
on your character sheet there.
And you go ahead and I'm assuming you'regonna take a seat and wait for the
fight.
Absolutely.
All right. We'll move over to,uh, we'll move over to squid.
Uh, sorry. Callum.
Aye.
All right. Callum, you,
you are coming in from thenorth side of water deep.

(09:30):
Uh,
you have a relationship withthe local bugbear community.
They're concerned that one of their,uh, one of their tribe has gone missing,
and they're afraid he may have gonequote into town looking for work.
And they've asked you to see if youcould go retrieve him and keep him safe
from the local people.

(09:53):
Understandable. Am Itraveling down the main road?
Yeah.
I'll just ask anyone ifthey've seen a bug bear.
Anyone that seemsforthcoming with information.
Alright. So you approacha, an older human and you,
and you ask them if they'veseen a bug bear, and it's.
Like, hi, geezer.
Uh, yeah. How, how can I help?

(10:15):
You've seen a bug bearwalk through here recently.
A bug bear.
Yeah. You know Paul Harry?
Oh, I know what they are. Yeah.
Back in my day I was rated by agroup of those nasty creatures.
Okay, how about in my day?You seen one recently?
Yeah. I saw him going downthis street. He headed down

(10:38):
not too far from here. I watched him walkinto that den of iniquity down there,
that laughing laia.
I'm already walking away.
So you stay away from there. Nowif you know what's good for ya.
I don't.
All right. So you head into the,you head into the laughing laia,
and as you walk in there,you see a, uh, a half work,

(11:03):
just kind of, uh, sitting at atable staring intently at a, uh,
pit of sand in the middle of the room,
waiting for something as a fewother, uh, people start to,
uh, trickle in with you. And there's ageneral buzz of excitement on the air.
Do I see a bug bear hanging about.

(11:25):
Uh, make a perception check?
Oh boy. First of all.
First roll of the night for you. Lucky.
I feel honored. Firstroll of the whole podcast.
Hot dog. That's a 22 .
Uh, you, you kind ofwant venture all around.
You don't see a bug bear directly,

(11:47):
but there are several doors that, uh,
have signs up that basicallysay staff only on them.
Is the scariest. Looking in thisperson in this place. The orc.
Yeah.
I'm gonna just sit at his table. Alright.
Um.
Shall I describe myself for you? Yes.
Go ahead and describeyourself because I I,
I don't want to do a takeall the fun away from you.

(12:09):
Uh,
you see a young man that istrying desperately to look
older than he is. Sitdown at your table. Uh,
just looking angry as could be.Scowl, clenched, jaw, chin lifted.
I'm a tough guy. You know, uh,
short trimmed hair and a single earringthat an equivalent to maybe modern

(12:32):
day world might be a dangling skull.
Earring is actually a mind flare'shead just hanging in a red gemstone.
'cause I'm tough.
All right. Orba, feelfree to describe yourself.
I, um, definitely, uh, look mostly,
um, or, but, but pretty, uh

(12:55):
hmm. More together. Pretty, Iguess. Uh, not pretty. Yeah.
So I'm a pretty, or, um.
Am I attracted.
? Yeah.
I, he's, uh, he, you cantell he's, he's trying to be,
he's trying to carry adifferent heir about him than,
than what a lot of orcsdo or whatever that, um,

(13:17):
he is not wholly trying toact unor, but he is trying to,
uh, he like, be very proudand be very proper and,
um, and to just, uh, be good and, uh,
just to try to, um, I don't know, change,
change the perception of ORsthat a lot of people have. And

(13:42):
I guess that's about it. I could getinto more, but, 'cause he's, you know,
he's half work, so it's notreally accepted by either side.
Rb, you see Callum sit down next toyou with kind of a scowl on his face.
I, not a greeting.
.
Why so mad?

(14:03):
I ain't mad at nothing.
You look mad.
Looks can be deceiving, can't they?
I.
Yes, I would agree.
You know, what's going onhere in that big circle?
Um, big fight. Did.
It already happen?
No.

(14:25):
Right then. I'm just in time.
I bet on the underdog.
There's, it's a dog fight.
. I don't know who's fighting.
I'm just trying to fit it.
You're doing great, you know.
Thank you.
Yeah, you're welcome.
. Alright, we will cut to Poo.

(14:49):
Oh yeah, .
So Poo, you are in,
in the back of the laughing Laia,
you have come into town lookingfor employment opportunities. Um,
and you have, uh, found what soundedlike a lucrative opportunity,
uh, in pit fighting. And given yourlarge stature, you, you feel like, uh,

(15:12):
you have a good shot at making acareer out of this. And you know that,
uh, if you were to win tonight's,uh, tonight's fight, you would, you,
you would make a thousand gold.
Oh yeah, sure. A pretty penny.
But, uh, if you lose, youdon't get anything. Oh, well.
That is Obama.

(15:32):
And, uh, in, in your, uh, prep,what they call the staging area,
where they've stuck you until the, toisolate you before the, uh, fight begins.
As you hear the crowd coming in outsidethe door, there's a knock at your door.
Okay? So I'll be, uh, I'llbe, um, doing some, uh,
some pushups while I'm, whileI was waiting, you know, oh.

(15:55):
And oh, oh, someone at the door.
So I, uh, I stand up and I goand I just, uh, open the door.
All right. Oh, at, at the door. Oh.
No.
At the door. You see, uh,two well-dressed trolls.
Uh, greats, gentlemen. A what,what can I have you with today?

(16:20):
And they talk to you in goblin. 'causeas a bug bear, you speak goblin?
I do.
They they talk to you in Goblin andthey, and they tell you. Yeah. So,
uh, you need to listen up. Alright.
Uh.
Mary sang has a, uh.

(16:41):
A very.
Important wager on this fight,if you know what I mean.
And, uh, you need to throw thisfight if you know it's good for you.
A throw the fight. I'm supposedto throw someone in the fight.
No.
No. You need, you need to take a dive.

(17:02):
There's a swimming pool nearby.
Ah, I'm sorry. I'm a,
I'm a bug bear of very littlebrains. At least I've been told that.
What? You, you need to lose.
Oh, you need to.
Lose. You need to lose this fight.If you know what's good for you.

(17:25):
I don't know what's good for me.
Good. I'm glad we havean understanding then.
Of course.
And, uh, they just walk off.
And they really don't have a clueof what they were talking about. Um,
I'm just gonna go inand fight like normal.
Alright. Um,

(17:47):
are you saying that as the character or.
As as you.
Uh, , he, he was giving you hisinternal, in his internal dialogue?
Yeah, that's just what I was thinking.I don't know what's going on.
Who are these people?What is this? D and d.
Gareth, you have only been in town down

(18:08):
probably about a month. You don'thave a home of your own yet.
And you have been staying at,
you have been staying in the laughinglaia trying to raise funds and
awareness to build your mission. Youcome down from your room and you,
you see that the ar the,the main area where the, uh,

(18:29):
fight pit is located is starting to fillup with people. Out the corner of your,
your eye though, you see, uh, two,
two individuals who are sitting at atable and actively not really talking to
each other. You see ahalf orc and an awesomer,
uh, just, uh, or an awesomer, orhowever you wanna pronounce it. I.

(18:51):
Mean, I look mostly human.
So, so you see a half ork andsomeone who looks mostly human
sitting at a table. Uh,
the mostly human has kindof a gruff look on his face,
and they're actively not talkingto each other despite the, the, uh,
expectation that's inthe air at the moment.

(19:11):
Are there, um, multiple tables?
Are there places where Icould sit by myself? What's.
Um, there are, uh, the, the roomis it, it's filling up fast.
Okay. Um, I would look for a table, notin a far corner or anything like that.
Somewhere where maybe I can,uh, keep an eye on the door,

(19:33):
but not like a dark corner. I'm notreally interested in the, you know,
what's going to be happening, the, thefight. But at the same time, I, you know,
want to be there just in case I can,you know, maybe talk to someone.
.
Sit down, and if I can't order somethingto eat something, you know, uh, meaty.
Go ahead and describe yourselfto the listening audience.

(19:55):
Alright. I am a bronze dragon born.
Um, I have my armor on, although I have,
uh, there's some fabricalong with the armor.
It's not just all armor allthe time. Um, so I have a, uh,
white fabric and atdifferent parts of my, uh,

(20:16):
my armor just sort of draped a littlebit, not a cape, but sort of like a,
um, almost like a loin clothtype thing in the front.
But I have armor covering my,the rest of my body. That's, uh,
that's what you got, Bruns Dragon wire.
Awesome. And so you're, you're familiarwith the staff that works here. Uh,
a one of the, uh,

(20:36):
one of the waitresses namedDottie walks up to you and, uh,
she's like, oh, Garth, you'redown early this evening.
See the fight?
I'm not interested inthe fight. No. But, um,
I am interested in food. So,um, what meat do you have today?

(20:58):
Uh, well, uh,
we have some freshly procured, uh, wyvern,
uh, that's been brought in bysome of the local rangers, um,
as well as, uh, oh, dear.
Uh, some, uh, well, I guessthat's all we have for meat,

(21:19):
but we do have some basilis eggs we canmake over Easy for you, maybe, perhaps.
How about,
how about 10 gold piecesof the Y Vern and one egg?
Uh, very good. We shalldefinitely bring that out.
So she go ahead and mark off10 gold pieces, and she's,
and she walks towardsthe back. So is he a.

(21:41):
Cannibal?
Uh, you, you'd find out in game.
.
Oh, no. .
He, he, he does have a point whyWyvern is of the dragon species, but.
Dragon points are descendant furenough away, but it's fine. That's.
That's kind of where my thought wason, on on that hole. Uh, I thought,

(22:03):
I thought you were painting him.
Into an uncomfortable corner. .
No.
.
Although that is hilarious. Ididn't even think about that,
to be perfectly honest. Um, and.
Some say Wyvern, I say, why not Vern?
Hey.
That's fair.
Far be it for me to yuck your yum,sir. , um, you get your, uh,
food delivered, um, and as the, uh,sun is going down for the evening,

(22:27):
you hear a bell ring,just a dinging. And, uh,
there's a person in the middle going,ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
you have come to see the champ fight
newcomer Bud Bear,
who the destroyer andwhat is sure to be the

(22:51):
greatest match. Yet,
if you haven't already placed yourbetts with our attendant going
around, and the fight shall commence soon.
Can I place a bet?
Uh, you raise your hand and theattendant comes up to you. He goes, yeah,
what do you want? We got, uh, we gotPooh here. Oh, we got, uh, we got Philip,

(23:15):
Philip the Za.
Now, has Callum interactedwith Poo before?
Um, not directly. You, you arefamiliar by association. You, you know,
you as someone you've seen in a crowd,
you could probably pick'em out of a lineup,
but you've not actuallyinteracted with them face-to-face.
I'd like to put 10 golddown on the bug bear.

(23:37):
Oh, so you're feeling like youwanna risk your money, huh?
If you want to call ita risk, I suppose. Oh.
PR Philip, Philip the bruise. He hasn't,uh, he hasn't lost a match yet, man.
So, I mean, uh, I mean,
the smart money's on Philip.
I've never really beenaccused of being smart before,

(23:58):
so I think I'll go with the bug bear.
Alright then go aheadand, uh, mark off 10 gold.
You want to place a beton this here. Uh, Gareth.
Is the character asking me?
No, I'm asking you if you, if you wantedto before I start this fight. You.

(24:18):
Find out in Game.
. Well, well, the, the,
the ring announcer had said,place your betts before.
Within the next 10 minutesbefore we start the game,
I'm just giving you the opportunityto raise your hand in game.
Did you see me jump?
? You didn't say anything.
There you go.

(24:39):
Well, fine then Steve. Fine. I, I.
And by the way, I saw,when I saw his food come,
it reminded me that Imeant to order food. So I,
I need to order some food from Dottie.
Okay. Uh, Dottie approaches thetable as you, as you lift your, uh,
hand. So what can I do for you?
Um, I'll have what he had.

(25:01):
Alright. That'll be 10 gold, please.
I'll have half of what he.
Has . Alright. Uh,there'll be five gold, please.
Okay. They'll.
I'll have a glass of thestrongest whatever you got.
Oh, all. You sure you want that?
Yeah.
All right. She cocks her head back andyells at the bar. She goes, uh, Seamus.

(25:25):
Well, we need a shot of thechaotic evil over here. A, uh,
few minutes later, um,a young, a young, uh,
gnome walks up to yourtable holding a, uh,
a shot glass that looks like itwould come up to his waist. Uh,
it's completely full with what,by our equivalent would be,

(25:50):
uh, tar Carbonated. Tar.
Good.
And.
Just how I like it. And.
He's like, ah, here you go.
I can't wait to see this.
I will take the glassand attempt to down it.
Oof. As you do this, uh, the GN looksat you with wide eyes. He's like,

(26:11):
oh, good. God's, you're supposedto sip it. He goes, well, well,
you're still conscious. Uh, that'll be,that'll be five gold please. .
I set the gold on the table.
He takes it and perceivesto leave the splash zone.
.
Oh, to be young again.

(26:32):
. Um, and with that, uh,
Callum, I would like you to makea constitution Check, please.
Super good at a sevensitting pretty over here.
Yeah. It goes straight to yourhead. You are rightly Steuben.

(26:53):
And we'll be playing with that later. I'm.
I'm feeling ready for this fight. Areyou all freaking fight all of 'em?
Let's go.
Amateur.
. Alright, so, uh,
after 10 minutes pass, food's beendistributed to those who purchased it.

(27:14):
Uh, you see kind of, um,
a wafi looking, uh, elf standing in the,
that approaches the, uh, sandpit. And they're like, oh,
you hear someone behind you, oh,that's, that's Philip the bruiser.
He hasn't lost a fight yet.
Are there's supposed to be twoof them? I see two of them.

(27:36):
As you, as you say that, as you say,yeah. As you say that, you see the, uh,
ring side announcer leadingout a bug bear, uh, poo,
you are following this announcer outto the ring, and he's instructing you.
He is like, all right, when we get inthe ring, I want a good clean fight. Uh,
no, uh, no magic, no weapons.

(27:57):
It's just going to behand to hand. And, uh,
if you're caught cheating,there's consequences. Alright?
I never dream of that. No, sir.
Alright. And he is like,ladies and gentlemen,
in this corner, we havePhilip the Bruiser,

(28:19):
a reigning undefeated champion.
I I clap very, uh, excitedly for him.
Nice. And the crowd's justgoing nuts. He's just like, ah.
Phil.
You know, everybody's . I.
Stopped. By the way, Gareth,Gareth is not going nuts.
He's just eating his foodand minding his own business.

(28:41):
Alright? And, uh, then with that,
the announcer leaves the ringand goes ding on the bell,
and Prince Philip looks at you. Hegoes, he looks at you and he goes,
they've talked to you, right?
Well, they talked to me. Well, therewere several people who talked to me. Uh,

(29:01):
first there was, uh, uh, Ibelieve his name was Jim. Uh,
he brought me a freshtowel. Um, and then, uh.
I'm talking about the trolls.They've talked to you, right? Oh.
Yes, yes, yes. Theysaid I should throw you.
And I, uh, proceed to try to, uh,
grapple him and, and pick him up.

(29:22):
All right. Make a strength check, please.
I will do that.
Uh, not great. Looks like a six.
Y So you, you hear Philip go, what areyou doing? And he slaps your hands away.
Oh, well, I believe this was a fight.

(29:44):
He goes.
You're not.
Supposed to. And he just goes upand he tries to take a swing at you,
but it's obviously, he pulls hispunch to just barely graze your chin.
And he looks, he looksat you with expectation.
I, uh, I look at him andI'm like, punch him in the.
Face. That wasn't much of a,a punch, was it? This is a.

(30:05):
Punch. And then I punch him in the face.
All right. Go ahead and roll in.Attack. Roll please. Alright.
14. It looks like if we'rejust doing straight, go ahead.
And I'm gonna go ahead and add yourproficiency bonus to that as well.
16, then.
All right. Yeah. You'd nail him.
Square.
17. Yeah, you definitely hit him squarein the nose. Uh, go ahead and, uh,

(30:29):
roll damage.
This is just unarmed, right? Yeah.So just a, a five, five damage.
So you punch him right in the nose,right in the nose, it starts bleeding.
He's like.
Whatcha.
Doing?
Oh, I believe I'm winning.

(30:51):
.
And then, uh, I go ahead andattack again. 'cause I can do that.
That would be a, Ooh, that one misses.
Yeah.
That was a five. So .
So everybody in the crowd you watchas the bug bearer takes another
swing at this elf. Butwhen he takes a swing,
the elf starts to run away from him.

(31:14):
And the crowd sounds veryconfused at this point. Come.
Back here.
Finish.
Him off .
So he climbs up one of thesupport beams to try to
run away from you, and he rolls a natural20. So yeah, he definitely, he, as,
as he's running away from you, heclimbs up to the top of a support game.

(31:36):
Question. Yes.
Did he disengage or do I givean attack of opportunity on this
guy? Oh.
Smart people. Uh, go ahead and roll in.
Go ahead and roll an attackof opportunity, please.
That's a 19 on that one. And then.
The 19. Alright, go ahead and takeyour op attack of opportunity.
Alright, let's go ahead.So another D four.

(31:59):
Uh, so six, that'd be six dam on him. So,
so I just, uh, reach up and grab like,uh, he's trying to get up on the,
on the edge. I just grab his legand take him and try to like,
swing him against the ground.
All right. So as he's climbing up this,uh, as he's climbing up this pole,
you grab him by the leg and then sort oflike, uh, lowkey like, sort of like a,

(32:22):
uh, yeah. Incredible. Hulk with lowkeyat the end of the first Avengers,
you just swing him down and wharight into the ground. Like.
That is exactly what I do.
He's like, this.
Isn't the way it's supposed to go.That you said they talked to you.
Oh, yeah. Did very nicefellows. . And.

(32:43):
So he goes to make akick at you in the knee.
Does an 18 hit?
Uh, yes it does.
So he kicks you in theknee for three damage.
Ouch. Well, that at leastshows a little ball.

(33:04):
Spunk.
You're.
You're supposed to fall down.You're supposed to take a dive.
Oh, yes, I did mention that. Ididn't bring my swimming trunks.
, what's wrong with you? Oh,
what's wrong with you?You seem to be bleeding.

(33:27):
Is that, is he saying this loudenough for us to hear it too?
Make a perception check.
Oh, my perception is zero. So.
Uh, Callum, yes, you definitely hear it.
I'm going wild. I'mcheering so hard right now.
Barely on my feet.Alcohol notwithstanding.

(33:48):
Actually, if you've got up on yourfeet, I'd like you to make a, uh,
constitution safely. Lisa .
I'm not on my feet. I is a.
One. You.
Stand up and you get a case ofthe whoopty dos and you fall down.
I'm living for it. I'mcheering from the ground.
I'll, I'll go over andtry to, to help him up.
Okay. Uh, so Callum,

(34:09):
a the half work that you've beenactively not talking to all night,
uh, comes over and tries topick you up off the ground.
I'll just, I'll, I'lloffer around the hand.
I throw my arm around his shoulders.
Can I, uh, put him back into his seat?
Uh.
Or do I have to roll somethingfor that? I don't, I.
Don't think you need to roll forthat. Uh, go ahead. Yeah, he, he,

(34:32):
he tries to place you back in,back in your seat. Ca You can,
you can definitely tell, uh,Callum is a little bit of a, uh,
he's kind of a limpnoodle at the moment, so.
Yeah, maybe I should havejust left him on the ground.
It's, it is sort of like trying tosit up a rag doll at this point.
Oh, I'm still hanging on. I'm standing.I need to enjoy this feed for my fight.

(34:56):
No fight for my feed.
Are you trying to stand up again?
I assume I've never let go of this work.
Yeah, probably not.
He is my new best friend, .
.
We're gonna sing our shantysongs later. It'll be great.
So you have a human leach right now.
Great.

(35:17):
Uh, meanwhile, back at the fight. Oh.
Ah.
Poo, I believe it is your turn.
Yes, I believe it is. That's a
seven-ish.
Seven-ish. Yeah. That'snot gonna hit. Uh, so you,
you lift your foot up to try to stompon the, uh, elf in the ring. He's like,

(35:37):
oh my God. And he rolls towards thecenter of the ring and just out of your,
uh, just out of Strikings area foryour, uh, for your foot. I mean,
'cause that's a, that's a terrifyingsight. Yeah. As bug bears are. They're,
they're actually, why don't yougo ahead and describe yourself.
I realize everybody's describedthemselves except for you.
Well, I'm bug bear, soI look like a bear. Um,

(35:59):
pretty rough. Um, I'm wearinga, a tattered red t-shirt,
um, that doesn't quite fit me,right? It's a little small. And, um,
and what, what color.
Is that shirt?
It's red, tattered red T-shirt.
Shirt.
Like a shirt that's red. And uh.

(36:21):
Are you like an orange-ish color?
Yeah. Uh, no. I meanorange or for a bugbear,
but kind of the brownish,you know, brown, orange.
Careful.
You guys are trying to march into Disneyterritory and I don't think we could
survive that lawsuit.
.
So. Alright.
Alright. So that's what I look like.
For, for people who aren'tfamiliar with d and d out there,

(36:42):
bug bears are very large,
typically described asaggressive creatures.
So bear that in mind.
Bear that in mind Lord. Um.
Alright. I get to make another attack.
Go ahead.
Okay, so I will, it's also a seven, so I,

(37:04):
I just try to stomp on him again.Um, but I, I totally, he rolls again.
Alright. Uh, Josiah? Yes. Do youhave your own polyhedral dice?
I do. I.
Would recommend rolling them because,uh, roll 20 rolls like dooo. Yeah.
It's not rolling greatly.
Oh. Can we roll our own dice?
Yeah. I, I don't believe anybody here isgonna fudge rolls on me. And if you do,

(37:25):
oh, I'm.
I'm a lying liar. Pants. Don't trust me.
I'll kill.
Your, I'll grab those dice real quick.
I, there's plenty of rocksthat can fall. Go ahead.
I'm gonna let you re-roll that. I'mgonna let you re-roll that second attack.
That would be a 13.
Uh,
that just barely misses You grazehis head on their second stomp and

(37:48):
he's just like, blah.
. If it would stay still,this would be much easier.
So again,
he's going to use his action todisengage and run away from you.
He's running towards anotherpillar trying to climb up it.
He starts to make his way upthe pole, but kind of his,

(38:11):
uh, pants gets caught on asliver about the midway point,
and so he kind of gets stuck.
Oh, good.
Well, so my, my go then.
Yep. It is your turn.
I'm going to, uh, to just, youknow, leisurely walk over towards,

(38:31):
towards him climbing up there and reachup and just try and grab him off of the,
the pillar he's climbing.Um, so I guess, um,
that would probably be a grapple.
Alright, go ahead andmake that strength test.
Man. These guys aren't muchbetter. That's an eight.
Yeah, he rolled an 18, so he, he's stillstuck on, he's still stuck on the, uh,

(38:55):
on the, uh, largesplinter, but he's kicking,
kind of pushing you away with his feet.You can't quite get a good, a solid, uh.
Oh, a slippery fellow.
So he is going to attempt todetach himself from the sliver and
he just, uh, he gets evenmore stuck in the process.

(39:16):
He's like, I can't.
Get away. Just get away.
Hell let my help you.
I'm gonna try to grab himagain and pull him off.
All right. Make that strength check.
That's, uh, 18 on that. He.
Rolled a 19, sir. So he's,he's still kicking. He's,
he's basically floating in the air,

(39:38):
getting the atomic wedgie andbicycle kicking at you. Trying.
I said I was trying to helpyou don't have to be so,
so kicky.
So he, he, he's, uh,spending again his round,
trying to get unstuck fromthe sliver. And he does not,

(39:58):
and it starts to poke him. You,
it actually starts to pokehim in the side a little bit.
You see a little bit of blood dribblingdown the side of his pants. He's like.
I can't get away someone.Hell, I said I was going too.
I tried to, I tried to pull himoff this thing again. Let's see.
Camo at 12.
Yeah. So this time you grabbedhim by his legs as he is,

(40:19):
as he's bicycle kicking.Mm-hmm. .
And you've got a solid hold of those legsat this point as he's trying to thrash
around.
All right. So I just kind of yank himoff the, the, the pole by his legs.
So I'm, I'm not reallyconcerned with his top part.
So if he falls and hits theground that that happens,
I'm just grabbing onto hislegs and pull him off the pole.
Go ahead and make a strength check. Okay.

(40:41):
Uh, 18 on that.
You succeed at, when youpull him off his pants,
rip up the back so you can seehis under his undergarments.
And he falls and he smacks his headdown into the, uh, base of this,
uh, support pillar. Go ahead and roll.
Damage being as he's making contact withthe base. I'll say, roll a D 10 please.

(41:03):
Two, he smacks his head againstthe ground. He is like, okay. Uh,
I don't know what the dealis here, but I'll give you.
I'll.
I'll give you 25%. Just, you know, follow.
The rule.
Follow the instructions,and he's spending his, uh,
his uh, turn trying to reason with you.

(41:26):
Okay. .
So I'm going to roll a.
Wisdom.
No.
Persuasion.
Persuasion. Thank you. My mywelcome. Even brain went blank on me.
He's gonna roll a persuasioncheck. Natural one.
So he, uh, you see him,you see him before you,

(41:46):
he's just kind of groveling and kind ofmake a, make a perception check for me.
Inside. Check.
Perception.
Anybody who wants to be a part ofthis gonna make a perception check.
See, see peeing himself.I'm making a perception.
Am I making them adisadvantage? Just as Yes.
You are soon. You are heavily, youare heavily handicapped at this point.
Oh, well I rolled the samething both times. So that's 19.

(42:10):
Oh wow. You are superperceptive in this state.
Uh, I'm not good at much, but I'mgood at seeing with my eyeballs.
Anybody who rolled above a13, basically you see the,
the quote champ in the middle of the ring,
groveling in front of thebug bear, and he has, uh,
wet himself very, very noticeably.

(42:32):
I might add to the point wherethe sand is sticking to him.
, can I start the chant?
Uh, what are you gonnastart chanting down.
With the champ, up with the bug bear?
Uh, go ahead and roll a charismacheck to see if it catches on.
Oh, I'm super charismatic. Oh.
Big at disadvantage.

(42:54):
Oh no. Alright, well that's a two.
. Uh, someone behind.
You with my zero who'sgonna be a two, someone.
Behind you just shouts atyou. Sit down and shut up.
Turn around and spit at him.
So, poo it is your turn.
I will do, I know what the rulesof the fight are. When is it over?

(43:18):
It's.
Over. Someone's unconscious. All right.
Well I'm just going to make,try to make that happen. Then.
How you gonna do that?
I'm just going to go, just tryto slap his head right between,
between my hands. So kinda like, claphis head in between his hands. Clap ears.
Yep. Clap his ears.

(43:38):
Alright, uh, go ahead androll and attack. Roll.
Uh, eight. Well that's an 18.
Uh, go ahead and yeah,you clap those ears.
Super hard. Roll. Uh, rolldamage and roll double.
'cause you're using both your paws.
Okay, that's max and that's max. Uh,

(43:59):
so that's 1212 damage.
Okay. A as you as he stands upand you box his ears, he, he,
you can tell he's, he's seeingstars. Uh, and he's got,
he's got some blood trickling fromhis ears at this point too. You, you,
you might have kind of given him aconcussion as well as some sort of a
hemorrhage. Uh, but he's still standing.

(44:22):
Are you all.
Looking? So go.
I.
Left my homework with the dog.
Oh, hit him again. Hit him again.
Well, I will hit him again if, uh,
when I can, let me know whenI can give him another whack.

(44:42):
Uh, he, I i,
he is going to roll to see if he canbreak the stu that you put on him.
Mm-hmm. , uh, with his term,
he just kind of shakes himselfout of it. He's getting,
as he's gathering his bearings,
he realizes where he's at andwhat condition he is. Sure.
Look of terror on hisface as he turns to run.
Does he run?

(45:03):
He runs.
Does he disengage?
He did not.
Alright, I'll attack eight.
Uh, you miss,
but he making a dexterity checkand rolling a natural one.
Uh, his shredded pants fall downand trip him, so he falls Perone.

(45:23):
It is your turn.
Um, kick him while he down.
Kick him while he's down.
Can I can, can I stand him up? Um,
that would probably be my action. .
You're you're trying to stand him up.
Well, I'm not gonna hit him whilehe is on the ground like that.
I don't think I'm gonna try to You just.

(45:44):
About three or four turns to go.
He just tried to stomp onhim while he was down there.
Yes, but I don't wannafinish him like that.
I want to sit him up so I can give hima nice solid punch when it's .
At least try to sit him up a little bit.
Alright. Uh, go, go aheadand make a strength check.

(46:04):
That would be a 15.
That'll do her. So you, uh,
you pick him up and you standhim there as he's there in a
shirt. And his, uh,underoos, he's just kind of,
he's just standing there, just shaking,
staring at you likeyou're supposed to lose.

(46:27):
No, this is a, a fight.I, I'm trying to win.
I think you are a little confusedand I'll just stand there and, uh,
this will be over soon. .
Make a persuasion check.
Oh, well that's a, that's a 19, uh,

(46:48):
so an 18 if we're, if we're talking.
Okay. Uh, he's like,okay, over, over soon.
And he just stands there.
A That's.
Right. And so that's his, he'sjust gonna stand there. Yeah.
Alright, well then I'm gonnatry to punch him. right,

(47:10):
right square in the face again. All.
Right. Go ahead androll with Advantage. Uh.
15.
Uh, yeah, 15 hits.
Five.
Damage. Okay, so you make de describe,
describe how you're swinging at himand I'll tell you what's go about what,
what's about to happen.
I'm just, just my, my arm justcomes straight out right at him.
Just straight from my body, you know,straight line right towards his face,

(47:32):
not as just right. Dead onin the middle of his face.
Right in the middle ofhis face. Yep. Alright,
so as you make the strike right at him,
you're balled up bugbear. Fist makes contact
and you feel his sphenoid bone go crunch
as you make contact. And as it crunches,

(47:54):
you watch his eyes roll backand he just falls in a heap.
Oh, well, thank you very much. I believe.
I won. Turn around toface the audience. The.
Whole room is just staring atyou mouth a gate. Um, the, uh,
ring announcer comes inand, uh, he, he puts it,
he puts two fingers on the neck ofPhilip the Bruiser and he is like, um,

(48:18):
ladies and gentlemen, uh, I, we we,
we would request that everybodyclear out here immediately, uh,
being as pretty much nobody'smaking any money tonight. Uh.
I'm making money. Wewould appreciate it if.
Everybody, every, everybodycould leave at once. I.
Believe I'm making money too. I'm goingto reach out. like to stay.

(48:42):
And.
Do you want to say.
Pretty much everybody that'snot a PC in this game, uh,
starts to clear out of the, uh,in, you see the announce, uh,
the announcer looks up at you, uh,Gareth, and he says, uh, you're,
you're a Paladin, right? Yes.
A Paladin.
Uh, do you have any, uh,healing spells by chance?

(49:06):
I do. Who needs healing?
Uh, this dead guy inthe middle of the ring.
I rush over to him and makesure he is not actually dead.
Uh, go ahead and make amedicine check please.
While they're doing that,
Callum is moving as far away fromthe Paladin as he can. Which.
Paladin? Yeah.
Whichever Paladin was just mentioned.Are they both Paladins? Yeah.

(49:29):
Dang. Son.
Uh, okay.
They think I was gonnabe a Paladin .
Could have been the Paladinsquad. Um, I rolled a 17 and, uh,
plus one to wisdom. So 18.
Okay. So you, uh, check him and Yep.
He is very much dead.

(49:49):
Is there anything I can do for dead?
Do you have a resurrection spell?
Let's see. Or.
Spare the dying. I think that'sonly a cleric spout, but.
If I laid hands on him,
it would not do anythingbecause he's dead.
I think poo's already laid enoughhands on him. .

(50:10):
Um, you can try.
Well, would my character.
Your character would knowthat if he was dead, there's,
unless you have some form ofmagical resurrection, you are not.
He's worm food.
Have I used lay on hands recently?
Have it, has it been somethingthat I've been relying on or.

(50:32):
Yeah. At being, at beingthat you're level five,
I'm going to say thatyou've done it before.
Right. But is it something whereI, I would feel as though, oh,
well I better keep this just incase. Or is it just like, uh,
I use it now once every couple of weeksso I could use it here. No big deal.
It reset. Well lay on handsresets every long rest. Um.
I will, I will attempt toheal him up to one hit point.

(50:55):
Okay. Uh, you put your handon him and you dispel you,
you dispel this divineenergy. Um, the fi the, uh,
three of you who arestill in the, uh, in the,
in watch as this mm-hmm., uh, bright,
this bright gold energy just kind ofilluminates under his hand over the, uh,
crumpled form in the middle ofthe pit. And then nothing happens.

(51:20):
How difficult is it toget down into the pit?
Not very.
Can I head towards poo?Yeah, I'm gonna do.
That. I, um,
say a quick prayer and close hiseyes if they're not closed already.
And then speak to whoever seems to bein charge. I think it was, let's see.
Okay. As you close his eyes,
I want you to make con make a constitutioncheck or constitution save. Okay.

(51:44):
Uh, 10 plus one.
Okay. Um, as you're closing hiseyes, because a bust Hi. His,
his sphenoid bone has just been turnedto rubble. Mm-hmm. as you,
as you go to close his eyes,
it's like moving your finger overa waterbed with his face. .
Oh no. .
Um, you are quite nauseatedby that whole process.

(52:09):
So.
I say an extremely quick prayer, . Um, and then, uh,
uh, talk to, let me see.Uh, and I'll talk to the,
the person who was introducing the fight,and I will, I'll just let him know.
This man is dead.
He looks like, he goes like, yeah,I kind of checked him for that.

(52:31):
I was hoping you coulddo something about it.
I cannot, he's dead.
At so at at, right. When you saythat, how, how far, how are you out,
down in the ring now? Klum.
Uh, I would assume I'dprobably gotten there by then.
Skirting as far away from thesedivine Paladin boys as I can .

(52:52):
Okay. Um, as soon asyou get down in there,
all of a sudden there's a black formthat appears in the mi that just
materializes in the middleof the sand pit and, uh,
right next to Poo. And he looks at pooand he goes, you and Mary need to talk,
and he grabs onto you. And Ineed you to roll a charisma,

(53:14):
saving throw please. Poo.
Oh good. I, I have a negative to that.
Can I try to grab poo as well?
Uh,
I'm gonna say no 'cause this is a surpriseand you weren't expecting this when
it, it happened.
16.
Uh, you go poof. And you have aren't,
are no longer in the ring.You guys watch as this, uh,

(53:36):
as this black figure justgrabs onto the bug bear and
they both dematerialize in themiddle of the ring. Oh, no. And, uh,
the ring announcer goes,yeah, I was expecting that.
Who was that?
Oh, that, that was oneof Mary Dee's Lackey's.

(54:01):
Who, who is married a sign.
Uh, actually go ahead and make a, uh,
I'm gonna say make a history check.
Ooh, I've got it plus zero to that,
but I wrote a 16, so I'm a smart boy.
All right. You are familiar withthe Ang Clan in, in Water? Deep.

(54:23):
Just kidding. I know who she is.
. Um, it,
it's a organized crime syndicatethat operates in water deep, uh,
sort of, sort of like the th the ThievesGuild except a little bit more, uh,
murdery, so to speak. And,uh, they're one of those,
they're one of those thingsthat everybody knows about,
but nobody talks about sort of thing.
Where can I go to find her orfind him? I don't care about her,

(54:48):
honestly.
Are you, who are you asking.
The announcer?
He's like, ah, nobody,nobody goes looking for Mary.
Nobody.
I am going looking.
Um, well, I mean,
if you wanna die, I guess, uh.

(55:10):
Never been a fan of living. Solet's hit it over with, I guess.
. He gives youdirections to, to the, uh,
east side of the northeastside of town to a, uh,
compound that's on the northeast sideof town. He is like, but, uh, I, I,
I don't recommend going there.
I'll be back for my winningsfor the fight. Keep 'em, uh,

(55:31):
set aside for me. Will you?
Yeah, I'll do that. He says, uh.
Orba is, is is, uh, I think he,
he is gonna try to stop himfrom leaving . Not, not,
not physically, but just like, doesn'tthink he's in his right mind. Yeah.
Kb actually, I want you to make a,uh, constitution saving throw please.

(55:55):
That's a three plus one.
You, um, as you turn around toleave, you fall over and vomit.
Good.
In that order. Yep. Youfall over Better than.
Vomit and falling init. Am I right? ?
But when you fall over,
you land on your back and so you'reon your back when you vomit. Oh.
That's fine. Listen, we've allbeen here before. It's fine.

(56:17):
We're all friends now. I'ma get up.
Um, go ahead, .
Go ahead and make a constitutionsave to do so with disadvantage.
Oh, woof. Well, that's a 15.
Oh wow. Uh, you man, you,
you start to get up and your handslips in the vomit that's on the floor.

(56:40):
. But, uh, then you catch yourselfin the, with your, with your, uh,
elbow as it flashes morepuke up on you and, uh,
you manage to bring yourself toyour feet as you're wobbling around.
Uh, I'm going to put a hand to my chest,
not the one that was in vomitbecause I would be gross, uh,
and kind of focus for a minuteand I'm gonna cast lesser

(57:04):
restoration on myself.
That's your one per day.
I'll take it. Oh.
Wait, no, you have thaton your spell list too,
so you can do it as yournatural attribute or.
No, no, no. I put it on there as a, uh,
just so I had it when I'mlooking at my spells. Yeah.
I see. Okay. Uh, yeah, so you are, you,
you immediately sober up and nowyou're completely aware of the how the

(57:28):
nasty vomit that's all over you.
I'm just gonna wipe it on my pantsas and, uh, head for the door. As.
As everybody, uh, aseverybody is watching, uh,
what you see is you see this, uh,
humanesque figure in front of youwho's coded in their own emesis,
and they put their hand on themselvesand you see this kind of li light,

(57:49):
blue light emit from their handand they immediately straighten up
and then begin to walktowards the exit. What.
Time of day is it?
It's in the evening now.
I'm gonna say it's probably close toabout eight o'clock in the evening.
The sun is starting to get, it's,it's getting very dimm outside.
The witching hour.

(58:10):
. Okay.
You don't know too manywitches do you? ?
I well, okay, so Callumis, is is walking after.
Yes. This, uh.
Heading out the door.
This, this individualthat you saw that was,
that had been sloppy drunk not thatlong ago, was starting to leave. And I,

(58:32):
I actually Steve and notSteve Gareth and, uh, BOL,
I'd like you to go both tomake history checks as well.
Woo. See what my bonus is there?
That's a.
20 17 17.
Uh, you both all are also familiarwith who Mary Des saying is,

(58:54):
so you know exactly what thisindividual is walking into.
Yeah. Well, yeah. And so, I mean,
I'm gonna follow,
I I am definitely following after himbecause I feel kind like he's a little boy
that needs help. doesn'tknow what he is getting into.
Offensive, but I'll take it.
I'll ask her if she, beforeshe leaves the, the the room,

(59:17):
is it possible for me to ask.
Tell him as the dude?
Yep. Yeah, I wanna asking the,the, I'm asking Kate, but I'll,
I'll obviously I'm going to ask theyoung boy, has he left the building yet?
How quickly are you askingme a question? Yeah.
I would say if I saw youleaving the building,
I would try to ask the questionbefore you left the building,
but I don't know if we had alreadyroleplayed you leaving the building yet.

(59:41):
I mean, feel free to ask the question.
I find it highly unlikelyCallum will stop to answer.
Okay. Son, do you need assistance?
Callum, as he is leaving thedoor will put up the finger.
good. Okay.
And continue to walk.
I see so much of my teenagerhood in Callum right now. It's not even funny, but.

(01:00:03):
He's a tough guy. Don't worry. .
All we can do is prayfor him. .
And this is when the Paladinsleave the party .
I will offer.
Prayer.
Yeah, I will offer a smallprayer and sit back down.
. All right. Okay. This is whereSteve left the party. All right. Uh,

(01:00:24):
.
Can I roll an insight?
What are you insight checking?
Um, not exactly sure what insight does,
but I mean, I'm hoping.
Read the tensions of people.
Uh, maybe something like that.I, I just wanna sort of gauge,
uh, this young ladd's chances against, uh,

(01:00:47):
Mary de sang.
Um.
Is it sort of common sense thatif anyone goes up against them,
then that that's the end of that person?
I will say make an wellto you're gonna be.
Do you mean likephysically against them or.
Or anything? I mean, if, if has, hasanyone ever confronted them and you know,

(01:01:10):
come out the next day, you know, no, nobig deal. Or is it always like, can I.
Go ahead. I'm gonna, I'm gonna tell you,
go ahead and make an insight check justto kind of evaluate the people who just
left to go there.
Can I offer perhaps a caveat?
I don't know how it would fit necessarily,

(01:01:30):
but that my motivationis not to go against her.
He doesn't know that. I wouldn't.
Know that. Uh, well, the question,
the question that I asked the man wasnot about necessarily where to find her,
but how to get back the bug bear.
Right. Okay.
Right. So knowing all of that, would,

(01:01:51):
would I have the feeling thatshe has zero ch that he has zero
chance?
Uh, yeah. Go ahead andmake that insight. Check.
Okay. So 13 altogether.
Um, I will put it like this.
You aren't super familiarwith this particular, um,

(01:02:13):
young man that just left the establishmentto go find the bugbear. Mm-hmm.
. But youhave a gut feeling that
knowing what you knowabout Mary Des saying
she's probably not gonna hand that. And,
and hearing what you heard being saidin the ring as far as you're supposed to

(01:02:34):
lose coming from Philip. Okay.
You can put two and two together toknow that Mary's probably not just gonna
hand over the bugbear for at the asking.
Okay? Um,
I will leave two gold as a tip andthen, uh, I'll start to follow them.

(01:02:54):
Um, when I have a chanceto get close to them,
I would like to talk to him.
You can try and convinceme all you want young.
Man.
I would persuade you perhaps to take some
caution with you. If youunderstand my meeting,

(01:03:14):
I would be more than willing tostand on your side in this matter.
Stand wherever you want, oldman, and I don't care. No.
Taking what she had said when she said,I can stand wherever, I will just, uh,
stand close to her and non, uh,him non threateningly and, uh,
and follow.

(01:03:35):
Don't worry, Steve. I have, I have a, uh,
I have a guy in my other campaign whoplays a girl and I have the same problems
keeping the.
Pronouns correct. , I,
I apologize that I have chosento play a man . Alright.
So, alright. So, uh, you,
the three of you eventually come to thiscompound and it's very well guarded and

(01:03:57):
it's walled all around and yeah, you're,
you come to the front gate and there'sa gate, there's kind of a gate master,
so to speak, standing at thefront gate and he, he stopped. He,
as you guys are approaching,he goes, state your business.
I'm sorry, who are you?
State your business.

(01:04:18):
Just wondering.
Well, you can, you can wonder elsewhereif you don't have any business here.
I'm gonna shrug and then go makea circle around this compound.
Are you looking for something specificor are you just walking to walk?
Uh, looking for anything that mightappear as though it is less guarded that I
could.
Uh.
Get around.

(01:04:41):
Uh, make a per make a perceptioncheck. No, an investigation check.
That's gonna be a three.
Yeah, no, it looks, it alllooks pretty buttoned down.
Are they just high walls?
Uh, there is, uh, it's high walls.
There's kind of like razor wireat the top of 'em. And, uh,

(01:05:04):
across the walls you seesome sigils, not sigils, um,
what's the word I'm looking?
Fores glyphs ruins. Yes.
Can I try to talk to her .
And try to figure out what, ask herwhat, what she's doing? And, and why.
You don't you, you don't have to askmy permission. To have a conversation,

(01:05:26):
just, oh.
I just wanted to, yeah,I just wanted to, uh,
rather than just start talking and.
him.
Him, what are your intentions?
Find the bug. Bear, gethim out. What are yours?
What Couldn't we nothave just asked the man?
Do you think the man that's scarred inthe gate's just gonna let us in? Would.

(01:05:48):
You like me to be your liaison? Yeah.
Go ahead and give it a try.
Uh, walk up to the guy.
State your business.
I, uh, using my position ofprivilege, I say Good day,
sir. I would like to speak withwhoever's in charge right now.

(01:06:08):
Uh, in charge. Where? Here. That's me.
Good. Good to know you,sir. My name is .
That, um, that sounded painful.
I assure you it is not. We have,um, let us say misplaced a,
a friend, and we are, um,

(01:06:30):
asking to see if youknow anything about them,
but perhaps someoneinside would know better.
Um.
Are you saying you wannatalk to the boss like.
My boss?
Yes, please.
Are are you aware of whoyou're asking to talk to?
Of course, I am being.
Persuasive.

(01:06:50):
Go ahead and roll a persuasioncheck with Advantage.
22.
Alright.
Just you or those two as well.
And my two friends as well? Yes.
Okay.
Yeah. And I have positionof privilege too.
. Oh.
My gosh. I wave them over.

(01:07:10):
Callum as, as you were kind of beingcatty and pushing him away to like,
yeah. Okay. Yeah, go ahead and ask as you're standing from a,
a distance, you watched the Dragon Boardturn around and kind of wave you over.
Like, come on, we're gonnago take care of this.
I.
I just scowl and I call.
. So Solen . So much angst.

(01:07:36):
I'm edgy. All right. Youjust don't understand.
Okay. Edgy mc edge, Lord.
Ugh, God. Mom, uh.
Mom.
Job.
All right. So.
As we're walking as, asquickly as I can and as,
as low key as I can to them,I would introduce myself.

(01:07:59):
My name is Ro. Oops.I am from Gerard Cati,
port City and the Abar Sea and Time. Yeah.
That sounds real fascinating and all.
And who might you be?
Uh, I am Orba TowerFall.
Well met good friend. You cancall me cow. Well, met Cow.

(01:08:20):
Yeah, sure. And I am not hereright now. .
You are in spirit. I know. I I forgotyou were there for a moment, Josiah.
You and my heart. Allright. Oh, good, good.
I'm just eating cheese and crackers withmy mic muted. So it's good time. Good.

(01:08:40):
Time. I appreciate you havingyour mic muted for that.
Nah, get right up on that mic for this.
Mouth noises.
So.
Uh, as you guys, uh, asyou guys are walking along,
you're brought into a, uh,kind of an audience room. If,
if you had to compare it to something,it looks almost like a throne room.

(01:09:03):
As you walk in there,you see a, uh, uh, a fe,
a female elf sitting on alarge high back chair with
two very strong and verywell dressed trolls. And,
uh, Callum, I'd like you tomake a nature check. Please.
Can I also, as we're movingthrough this compound,
be keeping an eye on how many guardsor generally armed people there might

(01:09:27):
be.
Okay.
Well, that nature is agood five. Wow. .
You need.
I'm a smart boy. All right.
I just figured as a ranger you'd,you'd know something about that.
Nah, nah man.
Yeah. Nah. Alright, so, uh, then I'lljust keep that to myself then. Uh,
so you walk in there andyou, you see the two trolls.

(01:09:49):
And as you've been walking throughhere, uh, when you're trying to keep,
you lost track of the number of armedindividuals you saw walking through here
somewhere around 30. Can't.
Count above 30. Cool. Cool. Listen, notall of us have a position to privilege.
All right. Public schooling, thenhigh school privilege at the door.
Public schooling. I was unschooled.

(01:10:10):
It, it's that common coreman. Anyway, um, so, and, uh,
in the middle of the room you see poo with
his hands chained to the floor. And
you see a large Goliath coming in

(01:10:31):
with a, some, an implementof flogging, good.
flogging, implement.
Sounds like we've interruptedyou in a private time. Oh.
Mary, Mary looks at Mary looks at the,uh, at the guy who brought you in.
She's like, what's the meaning of this?I said, I would see nobody at this time.
He's like, he seemed like animportant person. And he says,

(01:10:55):
you have a friend of his here. She's like,
so she turns her gaze toyou three expectantly.
Well, whatever's happening happens,
because I'm not about toopen my mouth and speak yet.
May I use my hunter sense on this woman?
What does Hunter sense do?
So it allows me to choose a creatureI can see within 60 feet and

(01:11:19):
learn whether they have aneed damage, immunities,
resistances or vulnerabilitiesand what they are.
Okay? My.
Character is, is physically in aposition where he's deferring to.
Callum.
Oh, I have, Callum is just gonna lookat this lady and then look at poo.
Look back at this lady. I don'tknow. I'm just here for the bear.

(01:11:45):
Hello.
I can tell you some of theinformation off the top of my head.
I can tell you that sheis a level 20 druid.
Oh, get wrecked.
Alright.
I can take her.
It's definitely not informationI technically get with this, but I'll take it.
Listen, I'll write that down. You.
Can go ahead and write that down.You can take that to the bank.

(01:12:08):
I will cache that in right now.
Which, which, uh, what informationdo you get with that, with that.
Damage or damage resistance,vulnerabilities and immunities.
No damage resistant, um,
immune to poison and
no specific vulnerabilities. Cool. Uh,

(01:12:30):
I would like you tomake a perception check.
That's a 14.
Um,
you also notice that shelooks Unnaturally hollow
at the moment. Cool. Cool.
Uh, I will look to the bug bear.
Hello.
. And look back to her.

(01:12:52):
Don't I recognize you from somewhere?
Yeah.
Are you, um.
Gore? Are you.
Oh, yes. That makessense. That makes sense.
I'm just here for the bug bear. I don'treally care what you're doing. Oh.
Well, I, um, I believe,uh, this is my ride.

(01:13:14):
I think it's time for me to go.
She looks at you and goes Thatput that bug bear has cost
me something. Very, very important.
Something I can't, with your dignity.
With.
He was supposed to take a dive.
Yes. People keep saying that,but I haven't seen the pool yet.

(01:13:37):
What.
Is it exactly that you lost?I, aside from the fight?
Oh, good one.
Um, I, that is my business.
But it seems like it's mybusiness now as I had money in it.
You've got some brass ones there,the size of church bells. So.
That's what I've beentold by all the ladies.

(01:13:59):
I've, uh, I can assess that you
probably can handle yourselfin a rough situation then.
Are you offering?
Um, I might be. From what I can tell,
uh, my involvement in getting get,
getting what I want back can'tinvolve me due to the nature of

(01:14:20):
the agreement. I bet somethingon this fight that I am not,
I am bound by arcane contractnot to interfere with.
And your bug.
Sounds like you made a poor choice.
No. Your bugbear made a poor choice.But if you're willing to work,

(01:14:40):
I think we can find an equitable situationending to the situation for everybody
involved.
I don't know aboutthem, but I'm listening.
I think I just figured something out.
.
They wanted me to lose the fight.
.
She just face palms herforehead a little bit and

(01:15:03):
looks back up at ca Callumand just like the, uh,
you know who I am.
I've heard of you.
But the Red Devils, are youfamiliar with who they are?
Am I familiar with who they are?
Roll a history check.
I sure will. Should we roll that too?

(01:15:25):
If you wanted to see if you are familiar.
Only an eight. A one 13.
None of you are familiar.
Yeah, I've heard of them.. . Wait, wait.
Lemme see if I'm familiar.I might be familiar. 12.
No, you're not familiar. Yeah, you,
you found it interesting lookingcrack on the ground. Ooh.

(01:15:47):
Crack pretty, it.
Looks like a, it looks like a rabbit.
.
So, uh, she's like, thenyou're familiar with, uh,
the reasons why I can't be involvedwith what I'm about to send you to do.
Sure.
Then I need you toinfiltrate the Red Devils.

(01:16:11):
They will have a metallic box.
That box contains what belongs to me.
If you can bring that back here, I'll,
I'll pardon the bugbear and I will pay you.
He comes with us. I'm veryhelpful in situations, uh,

(01:16:32):
that involve a strength and a punching.
As you might bear aware.
What's in the box.
I'm not at liberty to say.
You're not at libertyor you don't want to.
Um, it has to do with the nature ofthe arcane contract that was signed.

(01:16:53):
I literally cannot say, do I believe.
Her matters? How big.
Um, make an arcana check.
Me or about the box.
You.
Me?
Yeah.
Arcana. Mm-hmm. .That was a natural 20.
You are familiar with theidea of arcane contracts and

(01:17:16):
once they are assigned and fulfilled,
those contracts are bindingbeyond just in legal terms. Um,
oh, cool. They are, they areenforced by arcane law. Law.
Um, so if it would, it is very plausiblethat if there was a stipulation,
uh, a uh,
a non-communication stipulationwithin the contract in and of itself,

(01:17:40):
all parties involved would notbe physically able to discuss
whatever is and seeded in the contract.
Where do we find these red devils?
She, she looks at you and goes, yousaid you were familiar. You should know.
I've not been in the city for too long.
Then you're not familiar, are you?
This would go a lot easier ifyou wouldn't lie to me. It.

(01:18:02):
Would go a lot easier if you hadn't signeda contract that kept you from keeping
us information.
This would go a lot easierif I wasn't. I'm tired up.
And if it was a fairfight, it would would've.
Been fine if everybody would've justplayed by the rules. But I digress.

(01:18:22):
Um, they don't have quite asillustrious of a headquarters as this.
She gives you directions to a certainset of crossroads in the town. She goes,
they believe in a hiddenand plain sight philosophy.
It's the reason why mostpeople haven't heard of them.
Look for the house that has thepeople in hoods surrounding.

(01:18:44):
You'll find the box there.
And what type of metal and how big.
Gray about the size of a small casket.
Gray is not a metal.
I'm not method. I'm not intometallurgy either. I'm a druid.
Alright. And what do we get whenwe find it aside from the bug bear?

(01:19:04):
You said money.
I will pay you each 5,000 gold.
Alright, you can keep the bugbear for all I care. .
Oh, no, no, no, no.
No. Alright, you two in.
Um, the, the, the, uh,
person holding the flogging in implementlooks up at Mary and she looks down,

(01:19:29):
nods her head. He reaches downand unchains the bug bearer. Oh.
That's much better. Much better.
And then she's, she looks at and shegoes, you have 48 hours. After that point,
it'll be too late. Andthen you'll have much,
much worse things to worry about than me.
Did you hear that way? Fivedays? That should be easy.

(01:19:51):
What worse things are you talking about?
Again, I'm not at liberty to say.
You've signed a lot of thingsinto silence, haven't you? I'm.
Not Liberty, Liberty to say.
Can we draw something on the groundand you'll not shake your head.
Maybe you should just forgot.That happens to me a lot.
She waves her hand at the guards.

(01:20:11):
They start to kind offorcefully escort you out.
I.
Will go willingly.
Yes. I follow me too.
Me three.
All.
Right.
We're all going.
We are all going. And that bringsus to our first map of the campaign,
ladies and gentlemen. Woo.

(01:20:32):
Woo. Yay.
Uh, you come across a, uh,
a crossroad as described by Mary.
And there's four houses at thiscrossroad as it's more like a t
junction really when youlook at it. But I digress.
A tee time towards, towards.
The northeast corner of the,uh, of the, uh, crossroad. Uh,

(01:20:57):
you do see a house thathas some odd looking
hooded individuals at the fourposts of it. And go ahead.
I would like everybody to makea perception check, please.
11, 12.
I got a 10 plus my modifierand my modifier is.

(01:21:18):
Perception. Perception perception.
Is one. So 11.
10 For me.
Okay.
You can hear them muttering something
repeatedly while they're standingat the four corners of this house.
But you can't make outwhat they're saying.
How long did it take us to get here?

(01:21:39):
I'll say it probably took you about30 minutes to get there on foot.
Okay. So.
It's, it's dark while we.
Were going there.
Outside right Now.
While we were going there, could I have,
could we have interacted and askedeach other? Okay. Go for it. Okay.
On the way there, I would'veasked and I'll do it in my voice.
Alright, who's gonna plan? Oh, a plan.

(01:22:01):
That sounds like a good idea.Let me think about that.
We say we go up and weknock 'em all out and
we get the box.
Oh, I like that plan.
Any objections?
Can we just try talking our way in again?
I can't be very persuasive.

(01:22:24):
Wait,
how about you go up first on your ownand you try and persuade them into giving
you the box.
And then when that doesn'twork for me and the bug bear,
we'll knock 'em out and take the books.
We, we do have 48 hours.Perhaps there could be some,

(01:22:44):
some way around the frontalconfrontation. No, I.
Don't have to attack, confront on.
Can we see what the guys look, looklike pretty easily from where we're at?
Um, it's dark out right now.Okay. I will say go you.
Well, you've already madea perception check. It.
Wasn't great. I'll.
Say, yeah,
I'll say all you can reallysee is humanoid shaped,

(01:23:09):
uh, dark robes.
Maybe if we got a coupleof those, um, those, uh,
things that, uh, wearingor we could be all sneaky,
but that's just an idea from of a mayor.
So take.
It. We could also, as you.
Will.
Take a wide berth at thehouse, circle around,

(01:23:31):
see if there's a placethey're not looking at. Oh.
We could just punch. I mean,there's nothing wrong with that.
You think that's a goodplan too, for you? Mainly.
Okay.
And I just start walking forwardsa little bit in front of you guys.
So I thought you agreed with that plan.

(01:23:53):
I sure did.
Is it a, um, is that likea two story house or?
Well, I'm just wondering if we,
if we have any idea how long itwould take us to search the house.
From the make a perception check Looks.
At least two stories.
15.

(01:24:14):
15 Stories.
?
Uh, no, it's, it's actuallya one story house. Yeah. It,
it actually looks a little bit weirdbecause it looks like it would be like a
single family abode. So it,
it doesn't make sense that an entirecrime syndicate would be based out of this
house.
Do we know for certainthat the box is in there.
If we trust the lady who.

(01:24:35):
Here trusts the lady? Do I see any hands?
Can you see in the dark ?
I can. She's holding up a finger.
You not wrong.
He, he, he, sorry.
I don't think she had a reason to lie.
So what's going on here? Kids?
Um, if we knocked.
Them out, how long would ittake to search the house?

(01:24:57):
We have no idea. There couldbe basements, sub basements.
Uh, as they move towards the house,I'm gonna circle around the back way.
Okay. Poo, as you get that close.Okay. So for our listeners at home,
uh, the 'cause they haven'tbeen describing their movements,
they've been slowly marching up thestreet as they've been talking. Uh,

(01:25:20):
poo is literally standing right next toone of the hooded individuals right now.
Um, I'd like you to make anotherperception chick. Everyone. And I get, I,
uh, I guess it's gonna be Poo and Orba.
13.
Three.
Oh yeah. Who? You just hear abunch of muttering, uh, orba. Uh,

(01:25:41):
do what languages do you speak.
Klingon? Common. Giant or Common? Giant.
And Newark.
Okay. Uh, you don't, you hear them? He,it sounds like now that you're closer,
it sounds like they're chantingsomething repeatedly. Uh,
it's in a language you'renot familiar with, but, um,

(01:26:01):
you do hear what sounds likea name repeated over and over
again. The name being Damian Meth.
Ooh.
Where have I heard that before?
Just rolls off the tongue.That one. We should go.

(01:26:21):
I'll go. Well.
Um, can we see a door?Is there, is there a,
an entrance on this or?
Yeah, there's a, there's a, there's a,there's a front door that's on the, uh,
street side of this house.
Okay. Because I don't see it.
Oh yeah.
This is an overhead view of the map.
Oh, it's right there. I see, I see. Yeah,it's right near that corner, isn't it?

(01:26:45):
I would, I would imagine it's probablyabout that region right there. Actually,
probably closer to here.
Which for the listeners is slightlynorth of where everyone is standing. Yes.
Yes.
So.
Can we, do we sort of get a good senseof where Callum is for some reason?
Do we have sort of like asixth party sense or something?
Or unlikely that is that, that just.

(01:27:07):
For.
Where'd the kid.
Go? Walked away. .
Is that just for, for thepurposes of, of the dmm?
Um, Callum, I'd like you to makea, uh, stealth check please.
16.
Um, and whoever wantsto know where Callum is,
make a perception check, please.
I'll take that as a no.. I don't wanna know.

(01:27:30):
Okay, well, whoever wanted to know ifyou rolled less than a 16, you don't,
you have no idea. Okay. Hebecame the knight and vanished.
I.
Have no idea.
As you get closer or bog as you'restanding right in front of that, that, uh,
robed individual, you get a lookGood look at at them. Yeah. Um,
and when you see their eyes, 'causeyou're close enough to see facial, uh,

(01:27:54):
you notice that they don'thave any irises or pupils.
It's just straight whiteswhile he's chanting.
Um, can I try to,
I wanna try to get his attention. Um.
You're just kind of waving your hands.
Um, I, I'll, I guess I'll try to, well,

(01:28:15):
I'll try to speak to him first.
Hello?
Good sir.
No response.
Uh, I'll wave my hands now. Or likeone hand kind of in front of his face.
No response.
He doesn't seem to be a responding to you.
Perhaps a nice kick to the shins. .

(01:28:35):
Yeah.
I proceed to kick his shins.
Uh, go ahead and make an attack. Roll.
Uh, 17.
That's gonna be a hit. Goahead and roll. Damage.
Five. Damage to the shins. All.
Right. And as you

(01:28:58):
kick this individualin the shins, he stops,
he turns his head to face towards you.
He points his finger out at you andyou watch his mouth go incredibly
wide. And you hear this
just really loud and youhear the chanting stop.

(01:29:20):
And it's time for everybodyto roll initiative.
Whoops. Cool, cool. Cool. 11 for me.
Uh, I roll 19.
All right. Uh, Callum, you go first.
I assume that I can hearthem from where I am. Um.
Yeah, you heard that. You heardthat, uh, unnatural shrieking sound.
Right?
Then I'll move up to the edge of thebuilding where I am to the south of them,

(01:29:44):
staying mainly hidden.
And I'll ready to spell edge? Yes,
that's what I'll do. Um, let me justmeasure out a distance real quick.
Right there in the midst of all of it.
And when those red caped boysbegin to move towards the
grouping, I will cast daylightin that area. Alright.

(01:30:08):
Spell held or bog your turn?
Um, well, I, and, uh, in caseyou can't tell from the map, uh,
I will describe for listener,
I actually stepped back when hewent to kick the guy . Okay.
Just to, to, uh,
'cause I thought it was gonna be astupid move and just wanted to, uh,
be able to assess the situationand the response. Um, so,

(01:30:33):
uh, I guess, uh, I guess I'm just gonna,
I'm gonna, uh, pull outmy long sword and should,
like, I don't, am I, I'm not closeenough to attack or anything, right?
I'm gonna need to move.
Yeah, you would have to get closerbefore you could attack. You are, um,
you are probably about 15 feet away.

(01:30:56):
I mean, I'll, I'll move, I'llmove back where I was now. Okay.
And I'll just have my sword drawn,no attacks. Um, yeah, I guess,
I guess I, yeah, I guess Ican. Yeah man, I'm trying, uh.
It's hard to be the oneto cat draw first blood.
Yeah. Well, and I, and, and Idon't really want to kill him.

(01:31:17):
I'd rather just knock him out. Or .
Swing the you can as point of order. Yeah.
Non-lethal is something you canspecify when you make in a check.
Yeah. Uh, ,
although I would love to slap hismouth with a flat side of my sword.
Okay. Go ahead and roll.Attack with your sword.
Okay. Yeah, I rolled in, I, I, let's see,

(01:31:41):
16.
Okay. I just real, is that with theplus seven or not? Yeah, that's.
With the plus seven.Okay. It was a nine. Okay.
Um, now did you,
are you going double-handed with itor are you using going single-handed?
'cause that's gonna make adifference on a couple things.
If you go double-handed, you get ahigher, you get a roll of larger, uh,

(01:32:02):
damage dye,
but you also take a hit in your AC 'causeyou're not using your sword. I mean,
you're not using your shield.
Swear, where would my shieldbe then? Just on my back.
Something like that.
Yeah. Um, I, it's.
It's wherever the doom guy putshis guns that he is not using.
, I think, Ithink I'd use two hands.
Okay. So go ahead and roll the, uh,

(01:32:26):
give me one D 10 plus yourstrength modifier, which is a four.
Uh, so seven, that's.
What the plus four.
That's what the plus four.
Alright, so you,
you swing back and slap him acrossthe face with the flat of your sword
and he stops with the shrieking soundand he looks confused at you after

(01:32:47):
getting, after gettingslapped with a sword. And, uh,
but you did notice that he tooka bit of damage from that. Uh,
now it is their turn.So he's gonna come down.
So you notice as the, uh,
robed individuals start makingthe line in the direction of
you guys as one approachesyou poo Oh yeah.

(01:33:12):
Daylight shines all around them.
Okay. And what does daylight do? Uh.
So daylight makes a 60foot radius sphere of
light spread out from a pointthat I choose within range.
It is bright light and sheds dimmlight for an additional 60 feet.

(01:33:33):
Okay. It was a 60 foot radius?
Yes.
Good God. So basically thiswhole map is lit up right now.
So everybody.
From like this point.
Yeah. So that,
that's gonna be enough to encompassall the houses on this map.
Everybody can see everythingthat's going on now. And

(01:33:55):
the cultus in front of you, poo. Oh gosh.
He lifts his hands and hemutters something in a, in a, uh,
language that you can'tunderstand and he has to roll
a spell attack. Does a19 hit you poop? Yes.
Very much so.
All right. So he raises his hand, um,he raises his hand and mu or something.

(01:34:21):
And uh, all of a sudden you just feelpain all over your body as the skin,
as your skin begins to shriveland, and turn, turn gray.
And you take 19 pointsof necrotic damage. Yes.
Yes, of course.
Yik.
Uh, that's inflict wounds.
Oh, the better too. I don't know.

(01:34:43):
.
Um, and the one in front of you, or bold.
The ones whose shins I kicked.
Can I point at Poo? Likehe's the one .
Does the 13 hit you?
I am guessing. So what's my? What do I need to.
Look at? It's your arm.It's your armor class.
My armor class is 18.

(01:35:04):
Nope, he does not hit you.And that's gonna be a 14,
which also will not hit you. So he, hereaches, he reaches out with you with a,
uh, gnarly looking jagged dagger.
He makes two slashes at you,
but it just kind of scrapes acrossthe armor that you have on you.
So you can tell these guys are, uh,playing for keeps. Yeah, for sure.

(01:35:25):
Uh, Gareth, it is your turn.
I will.
So let's see if I cast bless,
would that be beneficial here?
No, I mean.
It couldn't hurt anyone. Imean, it's a blessing, right?
Well, yes, but, um, I mean, it says, um,

(01:35:48):
whenever a target makes an attack rollor a saving throw before the spell ends,
the target can roll a D four and addthe number rolled to the attack roll or
saving throw. So.
So basically it's giving you an additionalD four to your attack roll. Okay.
So I will take my action to castbless on everyone within range,
which would be 30 feet, whichwould miss Callum, even.

(01:36:10):
The bad guys. Yeah.
Even the bad guys.
. No, it'd be whoeverhe picked. So, um, who, and,
uh, who and Orba, um, as these,
as these two, uh, cultistsare attacking you from,
from your be from behind you,you hear, uh, you hear, uh,

(01:36:32):
Gareth all of a sudden say in the nameof the father, son and Holy Spirit,
and all of a sudden youjust feel a little bit more.
I feel blessed. , you.
You, you feel a little bitmore into hashtag blessed, uh,
you feel a little bit more in,into what you're doing. Taking.
Damage. .

(01:36:55):
Uh, Callum, you're up.
Alright, well, this man behindthe building that no one can see,
I'd like to shoot him. .
Uh, yeah. Uh, go ahead and roll attack.
Are you sure? Will. That'snot gonna be very high.
Does she have a Tommy gun?

(01:37:16):
A 13 ? Oh, she's fromChicago with my long bow. A 13.
Uh, a 13 will hit Oh.
Will, all right then let me goahead and roll some damage for that.
That's gonna be six damage.Is he still standing?
Sure is.
All right. I'd like to shoot him again.
Go ahead.
Well, if a 13 hit, then I bet a 14 will.

(01:37:38):
Sure does.
Oh, a little better on thedamage for that one. Let's, that,
that should be 11 damage.
Oof. Um, and like that you see just, uh,
to the common person just walking by,
they'd see this man running behind thehouse and all of a sudden he just sprouts
two sticks coming out of his chest.
He's just sitting there staggering andjust kind of starting to bleed. He's,

(01:38:00):
he's looking unhappy to say the least.
Is he still up?
He is.
Alright, I'm gonna take one step back.
Okay.
So that I'm no longer in the light. Oh.
Okay. Are you trying to be stealthy again?
Yeah, for the most part.
Okay.
I would assume he's also in thedark given where the light is.

(01:38:22):
Um, yes, I would say thatwould probably be correct.
He's probably in the sha inthe shadow who you're up.
Great. So here's something that realized.
That you have weapons.
I don't have weapons probably. Iwas in a fight and I was captured.
Yeah, but you have weapons.
Well, if I was in a fistfight, I probablywouldn't have had my weapons on me.

(01:38:43):
And if I was proofed out ofthat fist fight. Okay, take.
I'm literally telling you theydidn't take your weapons, sir.
Wow. Okay. What was that case? I would,
um, I would like to rage.
It's so weird hearing people say thatand not do it in the voice. All right.
.
I would enjoy rage. I would to.

(01:39:04):
Rage point, uh, I would.
Um, luck to rage. .
All right. You go ahead and rage poo bear.
Poo bug.
A poo bug. Yes.
A dung beetle.
All right. And I willattack with my great accent.

(01:39:24):
All right. Make it happen.
I'm assuming a four does not hit.
No, it doesn't. Oh my gosh. We, we foundher a will Wheaton of the group guys.
.
Let me try that again.Does the, uh, yeah. Uh,
a a 21 hit Yes. That.
Will hit.

(01:39:45):
Actually the first one was a littlehigher, but, uh, not that much. Um,
so then.
You're adding the deforestto your rolls, right?
I am, uh, 20, yeah. A 21, uh, to, uh,
uh, for my attack.
Uh, yeah. So, uh, whatwas the damage? Damage.
Damage, damage 21. Damage as well. Oh.

(01:40:06):
My. Okay.
So I just take my ax andjust right through, uh,
this guy's, uh, head, I'm justgoing straight across his head.
Um, so you make a,
an attack and you kind of tag himin the side of the head and it bur
right in the side of his jawbone. Uh,he's still alive, but he's hurting.

(01:40:28):
And the right side of his jaw is just,
it's not hinged anymore. 'cause there'sno connection between the mandu,
the mandibular joint and the, uh,and the actual jawbone itself.
And it's kind of, his head'skind of stuck to your axe.
You literally have to put your footagainst his torso and reef the ax off of

(01:40:49):
him.
And, uh, that's it for my turn.
All right? Right. Orba,
you just watched the bug bear nextto you cleave into the face of
this, uh, of this, uh,cultist in front of him, uh,
completely ignoring your non-lethalmethods. What would you like to do?
Yeah, and, and I wouldsay that, uh, my, yeah,

(01:41:12):
I'm feeling that they're veryevil now. And I'm also feeling,
uh, I'm debating aboutgoing after this guy. Like,
I kind of feel like he canhandle himself. Who can? Uh, I.
Will, I will say if you arein melee distanced, because,
and I'm saying this just 'causeyou're right, you're new to five E.

(01:41:32):
If you are in melee distance and youchoose to move out of melee distance,
that will give the person who has inmelee distance with you what's called an
attack of opportunity.
Right? Uh, yeah. Then I guess I'll attack'em with my sword again. All right.
Buzz kill, ah.
Blame wizards of the coast.I'm just telling you the rules.
Um, I rolled a seven.

(01:41:55):
Okay.
Um.
Did you roll the D four to go with that?
No, because.
You got, you have the blush aspect.
Oh, that's right. Yeah. Yeah.Um, I rolled a one on the D four,
so I rolled in eight.Well, I have an eight.
Okay.
And then.
You, with your sword,you have the plus seven.
Seven. Yeah. So 16.

(01:42:15):
That'll hit.
Okay.
So those no damage.
Uh, four plus four slash slasheight eight slashing. Eight.
Slashing damage. Alright.
And do I, um, and do I get, uh,
the extra attack since I'm a Paladin?
Yeah. Uh, do you, do you have the,uh, is the extra attack on you?

(01:42:36):
I think you all have extra attack.
Yeah.
Yep. So you can go ahead androll your second attack. Yeah.
14 Plus all my other stuff. So Iwould say that's a hit. Yeah. 11.
Alright.
So you guys watch this, uh,palate and just takes his, he,
he's just tired of playing aroundat this point. Takes the sword up,
brings it down on the left,

(01:42:56):
clavicle of this cultist in front of himand then slices it ki through kind of
Ginsu style and then does another crossslash across the other clavicle of this
guy. It just brings him to hisknees in front of him. Still alive,
but just hanging on by athread. Good. Rolling sir.
Now that's how you do it.
Alright. It's the cultist turn.

(01:43:18):
So this cultist is moving here.
Which for the listeners at home,
one colus is advancing towardsCallen's general direction.
Sorry, not used todoing this as a podcast.
. And the otheris wildly flailing about,
because someone moved out of turn. Sorry,

(01:43:39):
the hanging out behind Poo.
the ticking a dive. Uh,
he is going to the one in front of you.
Poo is going to take a coupleswings at you with his dagger.
Does a 11 hit you? I'm assumingProbably not, but there's.
Not. No.
And that's another 11. Awesome.

(01:44:01):
So he takes two swings at you andyou just kind of slap his hand away.
I growl at him. .
Uh, I.
Feel some growl.
And Orba the one that's in front of you.
I'll pass. No thank you .
He points, he lifts his handout, his hand begins to glow.

(01:44:23):
I'd like you to make a,uh, dexterity save please.
And you could add the D four becauseof the bless that, uh, that, uh,
Gareth gave you.
You're welcome.
17.
Uh, that actually saves. So youwatch his hand come up and aim,
he aims his hand at you and a goldblast of light comes off of it,

(01:44:44):
but you move your head just intime for it to shoot past you
and you kind of smack his handaway and that ends their turn.
Gareth, it is your turn.
I, uh, I have extra attackand I do two javelins at the,
the one that I'm going tomove in front of that one.

(01:45:07):
Okay? Yeah, go ahead and uh,
make your ja your two attackswith Javelins throwing
them down the street.
Uh, so the first was an unmodifiedsix and the other one was a 17.
So where's my So it's aplus seven tour attack. Yes.
Um, if that's what it says on your sheet.

(01:45:29):
It says javelin plus seven. Yep.So that would be a 13 and a 24.
Both hit roll damage.
And as I am throwing them,
I am audibly sayingenough for people to hear.
Hear mind sworn to valor heart knowingonly virtue blame defending the
helpless hand, upholding the weakmouth, speaking only truth, wrath,

(01:45:52):
undoing the wicked.
And damage and , uh,those are one six plus four.
Well I didn't add the plus four tothe rolls, but they hit anyway so.
Well it's not plus four.It's a plus a D four, but.
Yeah, well that's what I meant.
D four doesn't go to the damage.It's only for the attack rolls.
Right? So that didn't matter. So oneD six plus four for both of them.

(01:46:15):
Uh, correct.
Uh, two plus four, sixand five plus four nine.
Minus 15. Ouch. So as this cultistis running down the street,
you see the dragon born, uh,
the dragon born Paladin just stepped tothe side and pulls out two javelins and
just throws them and imp pales himin in his gut area and he just kind

(01:46:39):
of lurches back a little bitas he's trying to hold it and trying to pull it out
of his abdomen. Solid hit.You're welcome. Callum.
You are up.
Heck yeah, I have very good time.
I will step just slightly to myleft so that I can see this man
or woman. I don't know.

(01:46:59):
It's hard to to tell Thereweren't hoods Celtic.
I didn't ask you questions. Exactly.Equal opportunity cultus. Right? Uh,
and I am equally opportunity,
equal opportunity opportunistically.You know what? Yeah, exactly.
I'm gonna shoot 'em with an arrow.
.
More hurt, hit everybody equally.

(01:47:20):
I'm gonna shoot them with an arrow, whichis a 13 again. So I suppose that hits,
uh.
What was the, uh, attack?
A 13 to hit?
Yes, A 13 will hit, sorry.
Uh, that will be six points of damage. So.
He takes an arrow to his neck and he islike, ah, ah, and he is just trying to,
sitting there trying topull it out. He's not dead,

(01:47:40):
but he don't like life rightnow, I can tell you that much.
I showed him one last timeand hope for the best.
Good and hope for thebest. That's a way of putting it.
That's, that's a, uh, 14.So I suppose that also hits.
That does hit.
Eight points of damage. Howis he feeling about life now?

(01:48:00):
Well, on a scale of, ona scale of one to 33,
he's feeling about a two.If you catch my drift.
I do, I do catch your drift.
Then I will take a step backinto the shadows yet again.
He's bleeding something fierce.I can tell you that much.
Good.
Good poo bug. Alright.

(01:48:27):
I'm going to be rolling both ofmy attacks at once here because.
You're, 'cause you're one of those people.
Because I'm just, well, here's the thing,
I'm gonna try to cut off both ofthese colus heads in one below here.
So does a 14 hit?
Yes.
Okay. And a uh,

(01:48:49):
that one's that one that'spretty hot. A 17 hit.
Yes.
So let's see,
first fella here is going to take
1517 damage.
Which one is this that youthat takes that damage?
17 Damage.

(01:49:09):
Okay, you cut out again. I'm sorry,which one was it? That's taking the 17,
the one.
Right in front of me. Okay.It's going to be taken for 17.
Alright. Yeah, that's a depohit. I mean that's a depo hurt.
And the other one 14 damage.
Okay, so.
I'm just trying to swing rightthrough both of them. As.

(01:49:31):
As everybody who is near is watchingyou watch the bug bear rise up with
his ax and he doesmakes a whirlwind action
with said ax. And it'sa very, it's very quick.
It almost looks like hejust spins around and you,
you watch the cultists just stand therefor a second and then both their heads

(01:49:51):
just kind of slide forward andtumble down the front of their
chests. And then about ahalf a second after that,
the bodies actually realizewhat happened in fall.
You have cleft the heads from bothof these bodies in one solid action.
Heads up.
Wow. Oh, that I was not aware that wewere in an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie.

(01:50:12):
Whoever said that.
.
I.
Quite slow to that joke.
Hey.
Arnold.
Oh, I'm sorry. Go ahead. Youactually, you have movement.
Yeah, I was gonna, um, just headover toward the one, lemme just move.
Oop.
So he takes a step to the right andto the one that is impaled with the

(01:50:33):
Javelins that camefrom, uh, Gareth mm-hmm.
.
And so now he has encroachingon him and the other one,
he's just starting to get the lastjavelin pulled out of his gut. Okay. Orba,
it is your turn.
I think I'm gonna feel like thosetwo have him. So I'm gonna throw a,
uh, how far do I, uh, my, my javelin,

(01:50:57):
I was thinking about attacking the onethat Callum is thought is attacking, uh,
travel.
You are 35 feet away from that.
Ja from that I believe that javelin has
30 feet range on it.
Uh Okay.
Or you can roll with disadvantageof the long range. Yeah.
You could. Let me take aquick gander at your range.

(01:51:18):
30 Feet is the minimum range.
Yeah, it looks like the booktold me 20 when I put them in.
Okay, well, um,
I guess you would not take thatrisk then of wasting a shot.
Um, um, I I can I,

(01:51:38):
can I step in and attack this guywith the sword? Would that, uh,
since especially since I havelike the extra attack or whatever.
Which.
One? Uh, the, the, this one. Um,
I'm trying to ping him. No, the otherone because that's too far. You.
I think you would be able toget there. It's only thing away.

(01:51:59):
From me. Yeah, you canwalk. Okay. You can walk.
There.
Yeah, I'll do that.
Or run if you wanna go quickly.
Yeah, I'll, I'll Good, good. I'll mosey.
Alright.
I you could even hop scotch.
Meander, wiggle. You could do the worm.
Okay. Uh, I'll do all ofthem as I'm going sachet. Uh,

(01:52:22):
so, um, can I attack after themo after that moving that bar?
Yes you can.
Okay, then I will attackthem with my long sword.
You go ahead and do that.
Uh, so ,
since I have pluses, uh,uh, I rolled to one .
Um, now, okay. . It's our first,it's our first mat one of the night.

(01:52:44):
Ladies and gentlemen, everybodyclap your hands.
that. Let me pull some dms. Don'tuse these. I personally love them.
I gotta pull up a, a fumble chart. Kate,
while I'm pulling this up being as you'realso another resident DMM that's in
this campaign at the moment.Can you please explain.
Who.
Me? Yes, you could you pleaseexplain what a fumble chart is?

(01:53:06):
Oh, sure. See now when we rollnat ones on our skill checks,
they don't matter becausewe're all skilled at things and we can compensate for
that.
But when we roll in nat one on anattack roll Ooh Baby is a time for
a dmm to have some fun .It means that, you know,
you could drop your weapon, youcould stab yourself in the foot,

(01:53:28):
or maybe if you're close enoughyou could even knock out a friend.
We're gonna find out what happens. It's.
Almost like you're made to do this. Mm.
It's almost like I've done it before.
Mr. Earls, I would appreciate it ifyou could roll a D 20 for me please.
13.
13. Alright. So as you, uh, as you,
you're just kind of in a,

(01:53:48):
in a fit of fury when you're runningover there and you pull your sword up and
you reach it back and you juststart to scream maniacally
as you're bringing the sword down,alerting the cultus that you're attacking,
that you're there and he is going totake an attack of opportunity on you.
I'm assuming a 12 doesn't hit youthough. You said your AC was 18,

(01:54:10):
if I remember correctly.
Yes, it does not. So.
Fortunately it, he, it,as he's swings around,
he tries to make a stabbing motion at you,
but he just bends hisknife on your armor as you,
as you look down with your swordand you're just like, what? So, uh,
you did your motion. Do you have,
do you have any bonusactions you would like to do?

(01:54:31):
I'm guessing since I did the 1:00AM I allowed another attack or no?
Oh yeah. You got two attacks dur.Alright, go ahead. Sorry. That's my bad.
Come on. Second one, .
.
17.
A 17 will hit Go aheadand roll that damage.
Nine plus.

(01:54:51):
I'm just gonna stop you right there'cause he only had two hit points left.
Alright. Okay. Uh,
go ahead and describe the strike tome and I'll tell you what happens.
Uh, did I mi okay. I'm trying tothink. Well, I'm thinking that, uh,
kind of like what you were sayingthat I, when I was running over,
I kind of slashed down justkinda like over my head.
And then this one is more likea sideways strike. Um, okay.

(01:55:13):
Coming back around with it.
Okay. So here's what happened in thetot in the totality of your turn,
you had come up behind him and you hadbrought your sword back behind your head
and you let out a primal scream.
But he hears you as you're swinging downand he takes a, he takes a step to his,
uh, his left, which, uh,

(01:55:33):
he tries to make an attack at you withthe dagger and it just kind of blunts on
your armor.
And so you bring your sword backacross and cleave him right at
the ne right across theneck, um, with your sword.
And the body follows thatmomentum and falls over.
But the head just laysperfectly balanced on the side,
on the flat of your swordas you bring it through.

(01:55:56):
Sort of like the reverse of thetablecloth trick with a uh, set table. Uh.
He is just gonna let it fallto the ground. He'll let it,
he'll like tip its sword downand just let it slide off.
It hits the ground with a dull bump.
.
Well he wasn't too smart,so it should be dull.
Ah, I see what you did there.
Alright.

(01:56:16):
It's the cult fanatics turn and havingwatched you guys absolutely savage his
three, uh, his three friends,
he is going to try to run away,
which gives you poo anattack of opportunity. Oh.
Good. I was hoping you saythat. Is he dis or dashing?
He's.
No, he's just running.
Uh, so does a

(01:56:40):
more than a 20 hit.
Yeah. Surprisingly it doesn'tjust barely glancing blow.
Six damage.
Six damage.
Not my best girl.
No, I was a little bit surprised.
Me too.
Oh dear.
All right, so he takes a run back,
he puts his hand up atafter getting hit by poo.

(01:57:02):
He's just puts his hand up at youas he finally gets back and he
mutters something. Uh, go ahead andmake a wisdom saving throw please. Poo.
P Yes.
That would be a a three.
Okay. All of a sudden poo,after you took the swing,
after you took the swing swing athim and he kind of put his hands up,

(01:57:22):
you see this wave of force come off hishand and it hits you and you feel the
muscles and your body stiffen andjust kind of harden up a little bit
and you can't move.
Oh. Oh, that should bother.
.
Uh.
Gareth, it is your turn.

(01:57:43):
Can I, uh,
run forward to within 30 feetand then throw two Javelins?
Uh, yeah.
That's what I'll do.
And just so you know, guys, uh, movementdoesn't have to be taken all at once.
You can run in a direction and then dosomething and then do and make another
movement. It's just the total amountcan't exceed what your movement speed is.

(01:58:03):
Cool. Um, all right.
So I am rolling
to hit. Why is my brain goingdead? Okay. My attack is,
uh,
plus seven and I'm still getting theplus one to the attack or plus one
to four to the attack one.
Yeah. Plus one D four.

(01:58:24):
As I run up and do my two throws, um,
audibly, I say Ross undoing the wicked.
Just saying when you do that,you sound a lot like Steve Rowe.
Just putting it out there. Cool.
I'll take it. .

(01:58:46):
I love the fact that you knewwhat I was talking about.
Of course I did. What.
Do you think?
Alright, uh, let's see,
that's seven and two.
Nine plus seven is a 20. Uh, 16.
Yeah, 16 definitely is gonna hit.
And hoo. Uh, 19 plus one,

(01:59:08):
which is a 20 and thena seven, which is a 27.
Yeah, that's gonna hittoo. Did you hear that poo?
He turned into Tigger for a second there.
, tig not you.
Wonderful. Think about ts. Alright,so that's uh, one D six plus four,
one D six plus four, first one seven.

(01:59:30):
And the second seven14 altogether. Alright.
So you throw these two Javelins,
the first one nails him right in theleg. He, he goes from what you can tell,
it went pat, it went, it glanced hisfemoral artery. Yeah. And he just,
he's just pouring blood out of hisleg and he's just like reaching down,

(01:59:50):
trying to hold it shut.
And then you throw that second one andit tags him right in the eye and he just
follows that momentum backwards.
It needs just plops against the groundwith a dull thud. Congratulations.
You just solved my cultistpuzzle. Um, and, and with his,
with his, uh, deceased poo,
you fill your muscles spring back tolife again and you're able to move.

(02:00:15):
Oh, that's much better.
I thought I was a a done for there.
If we're not in combat,can I check him out?
Yeah, you guys are, uh, don't you.
Dare check me out.
.
You guys are able tomove as you will now him.

(02:00:36):
Okay. Um, I will also say, sorry,
someone check on Callum. I haven'tseen him. How are you talking to Pew?
Oh, I'm fine. How are you?
I physically make sure thathe's well, or if he isn't,
then I'll try to heal him.
Okay. Uh, poo, which areyou down any hit points?

(02:00:58):
Oh, I would say out of 50.
I'm feeling about a 28, so yes. Yes I am.
Wow.
All right. Let's see. Um,
so I have lay on hands and,
okay, so did I actuallyuse any to heal one? The,

(02:01:20):
the one, um, and he's down like.
22 3 22.
I will, I will heal him. 11.
Alright, so Hela, you seethe, uh, you see this, uh,
palate and just put his hands on you andthen another gold light just emanates
similar to what he did to thedead body. That's, but you feel,
you feel this warm presence emanatethroughout your body and your wounds begin

(02:01:42):
to close up and the withered skin beginsto come back to life again a little
bit. Oh.
That's very nice. Oh, how didyou, uh, learn to do that?
Uh, is that a learned skill or isthat just something I do ?
See, that is the best part about d andd. You get to choose your own story.
Alright.

(02:02:02):
I say, uh, I will tell you sometimewhen we have a chance to talk,
my friend, it.
Is a, oh.
It is a fantastic story, but right nowwe must make sure everyone else is okay.
Oh yeah, sure, sure.
And with that, I walk over toone of the cultist and I examine
him. I will try to pick off,take the robe off of him.

(02:02:26):
And would you say you'rechecking him out? No. No.
Well, I mean, he did sayhe's disrobing him. I.
Am disrobing him. I bow out.
It's a family show. Come on, .
All right. So, uh, you removethe robe, uh, on him. You,
you only find, uh,

(02:02:47):
they all seem to have the same typeof jagged dagger that's on them.
Um,
and let me take a lookhere and about 12 gold.
Okay, well I'll take thegold. I'll throw something,
throw away the dagger andI'll try to put on the cloak.
Okay? Um.

(02:03:08):
I'm recovering my javelinsafter we have a chance to, um,
meet up with Callum again.
Okay? Uh, lemme take a look here. Howmany job ones did you throw? You throw,
you threw four, right? Yes. Um,you are able to recover three.
One of them looks like it kind of crackedin the middle and wouldn't be useful
to Okay. Reuse. Um, and thenwhen you try to put on the cloak,

(02:03:32):
you instantly do the whole fatguy in a little coat scene from
Tommy Boy. Mm-hmm. .Mm-hmm because a fat.
Guy and a little coat.
because, uh,
you are a very large creature and thiswas just a human wearing the robe.
So it is a little bit too small for you.
I think this is perfect.

(02:03:54):
We can go in and they will neverknow that we are not one of them.
Eh, from your silence ante, I'mguessing you think this is a great plan.
. Uh,
and with that,
that's where we're going to leaveoff until the next session. Woohoo.

(02:04:15):
Woo-hoo. Because it's 1130in Florida and I know Mr.
Earls is a busy, busy dude.
Yeah.
.
So thank you everybody forplaying along tonight. Thank you.
Yeah. Uh, thank you everybody whois listening in the future. Um,
this is a first for someplayers at the table.

(02:04:38):
So for those of you who arescreaming at your headphones,
please be patient . Uh,hope you enjoyed the story so far.
I've got some more upmy sleeve and, uh, yeah.
So hopefully we'll putsome more out there.
I am anticipating it unlesscircumstances dictate otherwise.
Heck yeah, so sounds good. Wewill see you on the next episode.