Episode Transcript
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Charlene (00:00):
Have you ever looked
at your kids glued to their
tablets, wondering what happenedto the days when we would play
outside until the streetlightscame on, or created games from
our own imagination?
Today, let's talk about whythose days were so important and
how bringing them back mightjust transform your family's
playtime.
Welcome to the PlayroomChronicles podcast, where toys
(00:21):
spark imagination, learning andindependent play.
I'm Sharlee Deloach, a toy andplay expert, but a mom just like
you, navigating building blocks, puzzle pieces and snack crumbs
every day, ever wondered whichtoy will actually get played
with?
Or how do I keep my childengaged without a screen?
You're in the right place.
From ready-day rescues toskill-building superstars, this
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is your go-to for honest toyrecommendations, real talk and
play ideas that work, ready toturn chaos into creativity.
One toy at a time, then.
Welcome to the PlayroomChronicles podcast.
Welcome back to the PlayroomChronicles podcast.
I'm Sharnley Deloach, and todaywe're hopping into a time
machine heading straight back to1979.
(01:05):
No, not just for the funkyfashion or the disco music
though I'm definitely here forthat but to reclaim something
important that I think we havelost along the way the way our
kids used to play.
A few years ago, I was visitingmy parents and I started
flipping through those oldschool photo albums you know the
ones with the sticky pages andthe Polaroids and one photo
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stood out it was my brothers andI playing outside.
You could just see the bigsmiles on our face.
I could see the toys all overthe yard, the fort that we had
built from all these differentthings, like from old pool
floats and kites and all of it,and it reminded me how we kept
ourselves entertained withoutthe adults entertaining us.
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It also got me remembering thehours I would spend with my
Fisher-Price little peoplecreating elaborate towns.
With my brothers, we even gotexcited when we got a piece of
my grandparents' old carpet.
It was green and worn, but tous it was just grass in this
hard concrete basement.
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That had nothing special aboutit, but it sparked endless new
adventures.
No one told us how to play orguided us.
We just used our imaginationand kept ourselves entertained
and had fun, and we did it in aspace that didn't require us to
pick up.
Our toys were out and seen andwe play without our parents
having to play with us, and itmade me pause in that moment and
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think to how my kids wereplaying at the time wondering
why they weren't playing likethis.
What had changed?
Had I done somethingdifferently, without realizing
it, that shifted how they played?
At the time I felt guilty if Iwasn't entertaining them
constantly.
But this realizing made mechange my whole approach, both
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as a parent and as a toyreviewer.
Today our kids lives look sodifferent.
Every minute, minute seemsplanned, playdates are
supervised and screens areeverywhere, and if your kid says
I'm bored, we instantly jump into fix it, feeling guilty if
we're not playing orentertaining them at every
moment.
But I got curious how do welose that independent,
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spontaneous play and what doesit mean to have lost it?
Well, let's talk about how thismight have happened, and in my
opinion, I think three majorchanges impacted it.
And it started right after thelate 1970s.
First, more parents startedworking full-time in the 1980s
Both parents too and I remembersuddenly noticing how fewer kids
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were outside after school,because many of them became the
term latchkey kids, goingstraight from school to daycare
or structured activities insteadof roaming freely through the
neighborhood.
The spontaneous adventures ofclimbing trees or riding bikes
seemed to vanish almostovernight.
And secondly, I vividlyremember the era of stranger
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danger.
News reports about missingchildren understandably made
parents anxious, including myown.
My mom, who had been carefreeabout us playing outside in the
yard, suddenly had rules aboutus staying close to home and
checking in frequently, and thisshift tightened supervision and
shrank the freedom we had forindependent play.
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And then third technologyentered the picture Remember
Atari.
So video games and digital toyscame with set rules, specific
goals and predefined outcomes.
Now I enjoy video games, buttheir structured formats means
kids spend less time creatingtheir own stories, key parts of
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the open-ended play that defineschildhood.
Now these shifts weren't justcultural.
They've actually started toworry pediatricians, teachers
and even employers.
They're noticing realconsequences as young people
struggle with essential skillslike creativity, problem solving
and managing emotions hassparked important studies to
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better understand the roleindependent play has in healthy
development.
So one of those studies is inpediatrics and it found that
unstructured play, like from the1970s, helps kids build
essential life skills like theproblem solving, managing
emotions and social interactions.
Another study from a gentlemanfrom Boston College has shown
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that kids who play independentlydevelop stronger creativity and
adaptability.
Now I'll link to these studiesin the show notes and in the
blog post, but in essence, afterthree decades of these cultural
shifts gradually reducingopportunities for independent
play.
We have unintentionally createda generation that struggles
with these important life skills.
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We've unintentionally created ageneration that struggles with
these important life skills.
Now, inspired by theseexperiences and the concerns
being raised by experts, Icreated a new model that now
guides my parenting this podcastand my website, right along
with my Think Outside the ToyBox.
It's called Play Like it's 1979.
And here's how you can bringthis philosophy to life at home.
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First, up the boredom runway.
So one day my son complainedhe's like Mom, I'm bored Now.
Instead of offering an iPad orhaving to play for the next hour
, this time I just said, hmm,that's interesting, I wonder how
you'll fix that.
And then I walked away.
Now the next 20 minutes weretough.
He followed me around, whining,wanted the iPad, wanted me to
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play with him, but thensomething amazing happened he
went off and created his ownobstacle course.
He ended up solving his burdenwithout any help.
Now, with my daughter, I triedsome scaffolding play prompts.
So instead of sitting down andplaying with her, or telling her
just to go play and have herget stuck staring at her toys, I
gently nudged her creativity.
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I said something like I justsaw your fairies and they said
they want some new flowers fortheir garden.
Can you make some flowers?
And then suddenly, that simpleprompt opened up a whole world
for her.
While she made flowers out ofmagnet tiles and crayon drawings
, she helped create a story thatwas uniquely her own, just like
we used to do back in 1979 whenplaytime was powered by
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imagination.
And lastly, remembering my ownchildhood basement play area
that was definitely notPinterest-worthy, nothing fancy.
I don't think there was anyfurniture in there, just some
open shelves that they got fromsome flea market and a concrete
floor and eventually that oldcarpet remnant.
But it was this.
We could do whatever we want inthat space.
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So I decided to create a yesspace, if you will, in my home.
It was a spot with minimalrules, like just be safe and be
kind and don't break stuff, butthey can leave out their toys
without me nagging them to cleanthem up, and this freedom
changed their play entirely.
They would spend days buildingand rearranging things, just
like I used to, and seeing mykids find joy in independent
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play confirmed what the researchsaid the magic isn't gone.
It just needs intentional spaceand encouragement from us
parents, not entertainment fromus parents.
So here's my challenge for youthis week.
Number one try the boredom oneway.
When your kid says they're bored, don't jump in or hand them the
iPad.
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Let them figure it out.
Or offer some scaffolding playprompts like I did.
Give them simple tasks or ideasand then step away.
Or create a yes space, adesignated area in your home
where mess is okay and play cancontinue freely without constant
cleanup.
I love to hear which of thesestrategies you try this week.
Tag me on social media, shareyour experiences or drop me a
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message and let's inspire eachother to bring back playtime
1979 style.
And if you're eager to fostereven more independent and
creative play at home, make sureyou subscribe to this podcast.
You'll get tons of practicaltips, toy insights and
encouragement to transform yourfamily's playtime.
We spent a whole generationfeeling guilty if we weren't
playing or entertaining our kidsevery waking moment, but now we
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know better.
By letting our kids playindependently, we're actually
nurturing problem solvers,creative thinkers and confident
kids.
So let go of that guilt, stepback from being your kid's
constant entertainer and letthem discover play like it's
1979, because the timeless magicof play truly never goes out of
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style.