The Secret Formula To Picking The Right Toys For Your Kids

Have you ever wondered why your child stands in a room full of toys and still claims they're bored? After two decades reviewing hundreds of toys and speaking with thousands of parents, I've discovered the answer—and it's not what most parents think.

Most playrooms today have transformed into graveyards of forgotten plastic, perpetuating an exhausting cycle of buying, storing, and eventually donating barely-used toys. The problem isn't that you're buying bad toys; it's that many don't provide meaningful developmental engagement for your child.

Today, I'm sharing my game-changing 3-to-1 ABC Toy Method that has saved my sanity, wallet, and home organization as both a toy expert and mom. This simple framework categorizes toys into three essential development buckets: Active toys for physical skills, Behavioral toys for social-emotional growth, and Cognitive toys for brain development. The method teaches you to balance these crucial categories while limiting what I call "Dessert toys"—those trendy collectibles and character merchandise with limited play value.

You'll learn exactly how to apply this method when shopping, how to audit your existing toy collection, and practical strategies for deepening play with the toys you already have. I share specific examples of turning a simple basketball into an engaging activity through play prompts that encourage independent exploration. This approach doesn't just reduce clutter and save money—it fundamentally transforms how your child engages with their environment.

Ready to end the "I'm bored" complaints once and for all? Try my 3-to-1 ABC Toy Method this week and see the difference in your child's play quality. Connect with me on Instagram or Facebook at Playroom Chronicles or sign up for my free newsletter at PlayroomChronicles.com for more strategies to make playtime more meaningful and parenting less stressful.

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Episode Transcript

Charlene DeLoach (00:00):
Why do kids have shelves of toys and still
say I'm bored?
There's one simple toy buyingmistake most parents make, and
today I'm giving you the methodto fix it for good.
Welcome to the PlayroomChronicles podcast, where toys
spark imagination, learning andindependent play.
I'm Sharlee Deloach, a toy andplay expert, but a mom just like

(00:21):
you, navigating building blocks, puzzle pieces and snack crumbs
every day, ever wondered whichtoy will actually get played
with?
Or how do I keep my childengaged without a screen?
You're in the right place.
From ready-day rescues to skillbuilding superstars, this is
your go-to for honest toyrecommendations, real talk and
play ideas that work, ready toturn chaos into creativity.

(00:44):
One toy at a time, then.
Welcome to the PlayroomChronicles podcast.
Hey there, welcome back to thePlayroom Chronicles.
I'm Charlene Deloach, yourparenting play partner, and
today I want to let you in onsomething that's going to change
the way you pick toys forever.
Because here's the truth Mostparents are buying the wrong

(01:04):
toys forever.
Because here's the truth Mostparents are buying the wrong
toys Not wrong because they'rebad, but wrong because they
don't actually do anythingmeaningful for your child's
development.
And I say that not as ajudgment, but as someone who's
been in this toy world for over20 years, reviewing hundreds of
toys, talking to thousands ofparents and seeing playrooms
turn into graveyards forforgotten plastic.
And let's be real, you'vethousands of parents and seeing

(01:24):
playrooms turn into graveyardsfor forgotten plastic.
And let's be real, you'veprobably been there, right.
You buy a toy you think yourkid will love, you spend the
money, clear the shelf for it,maybe even hide it until a
birthday or holiday, and then,after one or two excited uses or
a week, it gathers dust.
And now you're stuck in thatrinse and repeat cycle Buy,

(01:47):
spend, store, sell, donate,repeat, right, exhausting.
So let me introduce you to mycustom framework, the 3-to-1 ABC
toy method.
It's been my personal sanitysaver, wallet saver and clutter
controller, both as a mom and asa toy expert, and it's going to

(02:07):
help you break that toy cluttercycle once and for all.
So this is what it is, the ABCbreakdown.
The A is for active toys, theones that get your kids moving
Think balls, scooters, jumpropes or obstacle course kits,
anything that promotes grossmotor skills, coordination or

(02:30):
physical energy release.
That's the A.
Now B is for behavioral toys,those toys that help your kid
develop social and emotionalintelligence, like dolls for
caregiving, board games forturn-taking or emotional
flashcards, right to help themlearn to name what they feel.

(02:50):
And C stands for cognitive toys.
These are those quote-unquoteeducational toys, the ones that
build brain power, the STEM andSTEAM toys, the math cubes,
puzzles, the magnet tiles, thecoding kits, the toy cash
registers, anything that buildsthese educational skills,
academic or real world.

(03:11):
And here's the kicker thethree-to-one part of my
three-to-one ABC toy method isthat for every three toys that
have the ABC, you get one D toy.
So let me repeat that, forevery three toys that fit into
those ABC buckets, you get one Dtoy.
So wait, what is a D toy, right?

(03:33):
Well, I call it the dessert toy.
It's those trendy, collectible,just for fun items.
Think of those little mysterybag toys, a plush with no
function, or a toy from a fastfood kid's meal, right, not bad.
Just not where we should bespending most of our toy budget

(03:53):
or storage space.
Because here's the thing kidsnaturally gravitate towards ABC
toys, those active, behavioral,cognitive toys, when we give
them access and opportunity todo those toys.
Because kids, as they'regrowing their brains, crave the
stimulation, the skills, thechallenge, right.

(04:14):
But if D toys, the dessert toys, dominate the playroom.
Boredom kicks in fast, shallowplay ticks over, and then we
wonder why they bounce from toyto toy without engaging.
So how do you actually use thismethod right In a day-to-day
toy buying, toy storage process?

(04:35):
Well, imagine you're shoppingfor your child's birthday.
Before you toss that flashy toyinto the cart whether it's a
virtual cart or you're actuallya target and pushing your cart
around the store while you'reholding that toy, ask yourself
does it either fit an A or B orC?

(04:56):
Would it promote some sort ofactive play?
Would it promote some sort ofbehavioral development, or would
it actually promote some sortof cognitive development?
Does it get them moving?
Will it help them care, share,express themselves?
Will it stretch the brain orbuild a skill?
And if you can answer yes to atleast one of those things that,

(05:17):
yep, it does.
It supports active play oh,great, it goes in the cart.
Or, yes, it does for behavioralsocial emotional.
Okay, great, it goes in thecart.
Or yes, it does for behavioralsocial emotional, great, it goes
in the cart.
If it's a C, great, it goes inthe cart.
Now, bonus if it actually fitsall three, and there are toys
out there that can fit all three.
Again, bonus if it hits two outof the three, but as long as it

(05:38):
hits one, then consider puttingin the cart.
If it doesn't stop and think,is it really something worth
spending money on or providingspace for?
Now, if it ends up being a Dtoy, like a dessert toy, doesn't
mean you can't put it in yourcart.
It's just stop for a minute andsay is there another toy I can

(05:58):
get?
That maybe would actually be anABC toy, or geez, I've been
buying so many dessert toys thatmaybe this time I'll put this
back and not get it, because wehave too many right now, or
grandma is going to be getting aD toy or something like that
right.
So think about whether or not itreally deserves a space in your
home, because really, not onlyare you trying to make space for

(06:22):
it in your budget, then youhave to make space for it in
your budget, then you have tomake space for it in your home.
So really think about whetheror not you want to do that.
Once you have that methodologydown, it makes shopping for toys
a lot easier.
You're going to find toys thatare really going to enhance your
child's play.
It's actually going to promotethem to play, because now they
are getting even though they maynot know the depth of it, but

(06:44):
they're going to be gettingthose skills, that richness that
they're looking for with thosetoys.
And you can also apply thismethod to the toys you already
have in your playroom.
So if you're about to gothrough some sort of spring
cleaning or fall cleaning andyou're like, hey, I need to go
through all these toys and cleanthe clutter out or get ready

(07:05):
for the holidays, well, applythis method to take that toy,
look at it and say, hey, does itsupport A, b or C, or is it a D
?
And sort it out.
Keep all the A, b and Cs andthen maybe put a little pile of
D toys and say, you know what,what are the ones that the kids
still seem to play with mostoften?
And maybe those still get tohave a space in the home and

(07:27):
everything else gets sold ordonated.
Or if you again really like tostill do the toy rotation method
, well, those D toys, thosedessert toys, you have to go in
a bucket and they get to comeout every once in a while for
some fun and frivolous play.
Right, we all need our cookiesand brownies every once in a
while too, but we also knowthose aren't gonna sustain us.
And that's the same method withtoys.

(07:49):
Now, once you have a playroomfilled with ABC toys, see how
your kids react, see how theirkids play.
And if you still see thatthey're not really going into
depth with some of these toys,or still walking by them or
still saying they're bored, thisis when you really need to
start doing and modeling someplay prompts.
For example, let's just say abasketball right, it's an active

(08:12):
toy.
And you can say go outside andplay basketball for a little
while and they're like I don'twant to, I don't want to, I'm
bored, I don't want to, I'vebeen playing basketball.
It's not exciting enoughanymore, which is fine.
But now maybe go outside withsome chalk and big circles on
the driveway right and chalk andsay, all right, well then,
don't use the basketball hoop.
What I want you to do is see ifyou can try to throw the

(08:35):
basketball into the next circleon the driveway.
Or I want you to bounce theball in the circle 10 times and
then go to the next circle andbounce that five times, and you
can even have more fun where thechalk is different colors, and
if it's red chalk and they'restanding in that circle with the
basketball, that means theyhave to do something silly,

(08:55):
right?
They have to bounce the balland do jumping jacks at the same
time.
Or, in the green circle, theybounce the ball 10 times and
have a little fun game with it,and all you have to do is write
it down on a sticky note or justwrite down a piece of paper or
index card, hand it to them andthen have them go outside and
play.
You don't necessarily need tobe out there with them doing it,
right.
As you know, I think independentplay is extremely important for

(09:18):
them to go out and figure outand learn themselves.
So it's a great way to sort ofbe part of the play by giving
them the ideas and letting themgo execute it on their own.
So this is your challenge thisweek Go into your playroom and
do a toy audit, sort the toysinto A, b, c and D categories
and if you see that the balanceis off, well, donate some of the

(09:41):
D toys or rotate in more ABCoptions and the next time you're
shopping, use the three-to-oneABC method, and I think this
simple shift can help you cutclutter, save money and actually
enjoy seeing your kids playagain.
And your kids will enjoyplaying again too, because play
isn't just about passing thetime.
It's how your child builds amind, a body and a heart that

(10:05):
works well together.
So thanks for hanging out withme again today.
If you love this strategy andwant more, you can find me on
Instagram, at PlayroomChronicles, also on Facebook, or
sign up for my free newsletter.
Just head toPlayroomChroniclescom.
Until next time, remember playwith purpose and parent with
confidence.
You got this.