November 20, 2025 • 40 mins
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Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_00 (01:47):
Okay, welcome to another episode of Pops and Sun
Conversations.
As per usual, it is yourfavorite Sylvan Fox, Robin
Lloyd.
SPEAKER_01 (01:58):
And it's Javen, aka Tech 3 Times.
SPEAKER_00 (02:02):
There it is.
And welcome to another episode.
Jay, how you feeling today?
SPEAKER_01 (02:07):
I feel good.
You know, I feel good.
How about yourself, Pop?
SPEAKER_00 (02:11):
I'm good.
And the reason why I say thatis, you know, we just got
through June, men's month, men'smental health awareness month.
And uh hopefully all is notforgotten.
You know, all the support, youknow, all of the clickbait.
You know, hopefully we didn'tjust have bandwagoners that have
(02:32):
hopped off already because youknow we're in June now.
So I mean we're in July now.
So hopefully, you know, we'vewe've met some very uh strong
allies, if you will, when itcomes to uh the support of us
men, because you know we needit, man.
You know, we need to pretty bad.
So, you know, I was thinkingabout, you know, since we're in
(02:54):
heavy into uh July, um, you knowwhen it comes to the patriotism
and and things like that, inJuly, man, I think that there is
a lot of identity crisis goingon, you know, people trying to
figure out, okay, what did whatdoes the holidays really mean?
(03:17):
You know, uh, what's behind it?
You know, uh, why are wecelebrating?
Do we have the right?
Are we uh you know celebratingappropriately?
Yeah, you know, um, is this justyou know, is this just a pagan
holiday?
You know, whatever the case is,you know, July is one of those
months where you kind of thinkabout I what what does this
(03:40):
really mean to me, culturally,historically, you know, uh
community-wise, ancestrally.
So uh so I kind of want to digin a little bit about the home,
the family dynamic, and youknow, just maybe we can we can
name it like home is where theheart is.
(04:01):
Oh, yeah.
Right?
Home is where the heart is, youknow.
We're not trying to do aHallmark card, you know, but we
are trying to make sure that wewe do realize the importance of
home because Jay, let's let'sjust be real.
We hear more about broken homesthan we do about homes that are
actually staying together andcreating legacy.
(04:23):
Am I right or wrong?
Nah, you're right.
You're right when you're right.
Hey, broken homes is a topic, atrending topic, right?
But uh, you know, we have toreally talk about you know the
dynamic of the homes becausethere's a lot of homes that are
doing um a lot of the rightthings.
You know, I remember growing up,we would we would kind of stress
(04:48):
about the importance of stayingin that industry or staying in
that field.
And what I mean by that, Jay, isyou know, your great-granddad,
he he he, you know, uh, or yourgranddad is in the navy, right?
So so I went into the military.
Uh my sister went into theMarines.
Um, none of y'all went into themilitary.
(05:10):
I ain't mad at y'all though,right?
SPEAKER_01 (05:13):
I wanted to, though.
SPEAKER_00 (05:15):
Right, right.
But I I wouldn't I wouldn't havebeen mad either way, because you
know, uh, there's a lot ofevolution, but at the same time,
there's always those intricaciesof the unknown.
So you don't know what wouldhappen if you did go in, even if
it was something that you wantedto do, uh, meaning job-wise, if
you wanted to travel and thingslike that.
(05:36):
So um, but me growing up, man, Iremember it that it was so
stressed that you follow in thefootsteps of your family.
So if there, if you're a familyof lawyers, you better get ready
to go to law school.
I don't care if you want to playuh basketball, if you want to
(05:58):
become uh uh an athlete or ifyou want to do something
different, you go into lawschool.
Uh, your mama, your daddy wentto law school, your great
granddaddy went to law, you gointo law school.
Now you can figure out after youget your law degree what you
want to do after you get yourpractice, what you could do on
the side, but no, you you'reabout to be a lawyer, you're
(06:20):
about to be in law enforcement,you're about to be in politics,
you you're about to be insports.
Even sports, man, even thelineage of sports goes a long
way.
So, you know, so let me ask you,Jason, what do you think when it
comes to you know the parentsbeing the first leaders and
(06:43):
being that example in thehousehold?
Do you think that that is a goodthing because they're paving a
paving the way?
Or do you think that could betraumatic because of the
pressure of uh of thegenerations afterwards?
SPEAKER_01 (06:59):
Oh yeah.
Yeah, you know, it's it's one ofthose things where it could go
um either way.
And it's really a lot of timesit's gonna be on the parent to
kind of foster um what thechild's reaction is gonna be.
But I do think overall, um it'sa good thing, though, because
either way, there's some type ofstructure there, or there's some
(07:20):
type of influence.
I would rather have been in ahousehold where uh my parents
did something for me that theythought was gonna be in my best
interest, and maybe I didn'tnecessarily agree with it 100%.
But I mean, I don't think it'sanybody, anybody out there
that's uh mad that they have auh a law degree or that's mad
that they got, you know, theirdoctor or nurse or whatever the
(07:42):
case, or or they're playing um,you know, in the NBA because
their parents were so hard onthem.
Like that I don't think they'remad at that.
But um, you know, at the sametime, it just gotta be something
that that the parents are areconsiderate about.
But that on that flip side whereyou talk about the pressures, uh
man, yeah, I I I can see thattoo.
(08:03):
So overall, I I think it'sprobably for the best, and I
think a lot of parents do domean well, right?
But you know, it's you know,it's just it's just one of those
things, kind of case by case.
But overall, I think they meanwell, and I think it's probably
better just for that structure,you know.
SPEAKER_00 (08:19):
Yeah, I'll add to that because not only the the
structure, because that's that'swhat they know, right?
Uh there's routines, uh, there'sa blueprint to be able to be
successful in in that that lane,but also you got to think about
the resources, the people thatthey come across, right?
(08:41):
The business owners, the the uhthe CEOs, the VPs, you know, the
the connections.
And so really it's a it's agreat opportunity to have that
under your belt because eveneven with that, even having that
structure, the access toresources, there's always gonna
(09:01):
be that black sheep that's notgonna want to do none of that.
SPEAKER_01 (09:04):
Yeah, right?
SPEAKER_00 (09:05):
There's always gonna be, and even if it even if it's
a black sheet moment, like youknow what, now I don't want to
do that, I want to figure it outon on my own.
Thank you for paving the way forme to do that, but I don't want
to do that at all.
And so what can happen then isthey uh uh the the parents may
(09:27):
feel like, hey, you know what,you you're breaking up the
legacy here, right?
And plus you're you're not evenuh a master at what you're
talking about.
So if you want to be a musician,right, you want you want to do
something completely different,you want to be an actor, you
know, you want to go into youknow, maybe uh a different type
of vocation, uh school orsomething like that, they're
(09:51):
gonna feel like you're offcourse, but they're also gonna
feel like they can't help you.
And so I want I want to kind ofdig into the difference between
a role model and a mentor.
Um, that this is one of myfavorite subjects I like to talk
about.
Uh, you know, we just recentlylaunched uh a mentor a
(10:11):
mentorship program, uh startingwith young men at 12 years old,
um, called the EG League.
So you guys can go to Pops andSun and kind of get some more
information.
But you know, I love talking tothe to the youth about the
difference between a role modeland a uh and a mentor.
(10:33):
So, Jay, when when you thinkabout it, what what comes to
mind of the importance of both?
Because I do feel like both havetheir place.
But what do you think is thedifference, or what comes to
mind when you think about bothof them?
SPEAKER_01 (10:50):
So, right off the bat, I feel like role models are
more of like your publicfigures.
Mentors are gonna be yourpersonal ones, right?
So your role models, uh, theremight be somebody, and you know,
this this phrase has been coineduh recently, your influencers.
It may be an influencer youfollow online that you just
(11:10):
think is somebody cool, and youcan maybe you identify with
them.
Uh they you see something inthem that you don't uh or you or
like I said, you identify.
So, you know, maybe they'rethey're doing something that you
do that you don't see a lotaround you, or a lot of your
friends don't do.
So it it kind of makes you feelum, you know, a little bit more
(11:30):
accepted or like, okay, this ismaybe I'm not this this weirdo
that like that's into such andsuch because this person I see
is into it as well.
But um a mentor, on the otherhand, you know, that's somebody
that, like I said, it's it's alot more personal.
That's gonna be somebody whosees your potential and um is
(11:51):
even gonna hold you accountableto it.
Um, you know, they'll give youfeedback.
Um, you know, like a coach is isis another good uh another good
term I like to think of when youthink about what coaches do, you
know, to their players, like howthey um, you know, maybe
sometimes be a little bit hardon them, but it's only because
they want to bring the best outof them and they see the
(12:14):
potential and they want to helpthem grow.
SPEAKER_00 (12:16):
Yeah, yeah, I agree with you 1,000%.
Uh I always tell this storyanytime I talk about mentorship
and role models.
I remember being booked to uh tohost a rooftop party in uh
Minneapolis, uh, Minnesota.
And it was a bunch of ladies.
I'm not gonna lie, man.
It was probably about eight toten ladies that was in this area
(12:41):
that I was in the lobby of thehotel because the rooftop was at
that hotel.
And then there was like one guy.
So I'm looking at the dude like,hey man, you you got to stay
here.
Like, we got to be eye to eye,we got to be on the same page,
even if it's just for thismoment.
Set aside our differences andhow you feel.
We got to be on the same page.
And I remember, you know, theconversation just talking about
(13:04):
the difference between, youknow, um, a role model and a
mentor, and really I was talkingmore so the importance of a
mentor in our communities,because a role model, you can
you can have a role model besomeone that you see or in and
never meet, it could be anathlete, it could be an actor,
it could be an author, um, itcould be somebody who you know
(13:28):
you is really popular, and thatcould be a role model, but that
role model isn't necessarilytaking you through the steps of
success in whatever you'reinterested in, and so that's
where a mentor comes into playbecause they specialize in
(13:48):
helping you navigate throughwhatever you're interested in.
And so if your dad sells cars,if if if your dad is a mechanic
and you want to get into IT,well your daddy can't help you.
Meaning he can't teach you, butI think what he can do is he can
(14:10):
bridge the gap and get youaccess to that resource.
Bridge the gap and introduce youto a mentor.
I think that will be extremelypowerful versus feeling like, oh
well, he ain't your daddy, orI'ma always be your dad.
And you know what I mean?
And that can kind of defuse anytype of animosity when it comes
(14:35):
to that kid or that young adultreally wanting to thrive in that
field and not feeling likethey're gonna disappoint their
parents because they're notgoing into whatever uh that
industry is through the lineage.
So I think that that's extremelypowerful.
Um, mentorship is not easy, likein order to be a mentor, like
(14:59):
you have to go throughmentorship yourself.
So you have to know what thatprocess is like, you have to
understand that each individualis gonna be different.
People have different learningcurves, and you have to be
extremely flexible with allthese different personalities.
SPEAKER_01 (15:17):
Yeah.
Yeah, I agree.
I think that today, um, I thinkwe have a lot more role models
than than mentors.
I think we we definitely have alack of mentors.
And I think even that, you know,when we talk about the
generations, I think there's a adisconnect there.
You know, I'm not even sure ifum, you know, they understand
(15:41):
what you know what a mentor isor or or how to how to find one
or how to seek one out or or youknow how to um to to even go
about that, you know what Imean?
So yeah, it's it's it'sdefinitely something that you
know there's there's gotta besomething done.
You know what I mean?
And I know there's there'sdifferent there's different
(16:03):
programs, and I and and youknow, I think we'll probably get
into that a little bit later inthe conversation.
But um, yeah, I I agree with you100%, Pops.
Um mentorship definitely gottauh be on the forefront,
something that we got to to keepto keep pushing in and having
conversations about.
SPEAKER_00 (16:20):
You have those conversations, and I think that
these are the type of thingsthat we need to look at when
when we're doing the familyreunions, and that that's even
sounds foreign, right?
Like when's the last time youwent to a family reunion of
yours?
Yeah, I ain't talking about agood friend of yours that said
that you know they're gonna becooking, ribs, and everything.
I'm talking about actually yourfamily reunions, and family
(16:44):
reunions don't have to be eight,nine generations and don't have
to be 200 to 300 people, youknow, at the cookout with
t-shirts on, right?
Family reunion can can literallybe that people that you have not
met in your in your uh lineage,in your family tree.
Um, it could be just everybodybeing at the same place at one
(17:06):
time for a change.
Like those to me are familyreunions that truly matter.
So when we we get into that,when we talk about the parents
being the leaders, that'ssomething that we need to hold
ourselves accountable for.
Like, you know, uh, I want tosee my aunts and uncles and
cousins and siblings because youknow they're adults and they
(17:29):
live in different states.
And let's let's make this happenbecause it's so easy to get
caught up in your own familydynamic, and and you guys are
you know going to the lake andyou guys are going to to uh you
know the mountains and andtaking trips across seas and
stuff like that when you have awhole generation that truly may
(17:50):
need you, and at some point youmay need them.
Now you're in their city, nowyou're in their state.
Now you realize you have acousin who's the mayor.
Now you realize that you have auh a celebrity stylist aunt.
Now you now you have, you know,uh Mr.
Check three times in Atlanta.
SPEAKER_01 (18:09):
Yeah, connect the dots.
SPEAKER_00 (18:11):
Can I come to one of your shows or something, bro?
What's happening?
SPEAKER_01 (18:14):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
See, that's that's you know,that's so important when we when
see connecting those dotsthough, right?
SPEAKER_00 (18:21):
Right.
SPEAKER_01 (18:21):
This is um, you know, this, but but this is also
something that that I think alot of people just, you know, it
is is lost on them.
And we talked about thatstructure earlier about in the
household, but this is another,this is like another uh just
like expansion of that, right?
It's not even a structure, it'smore like a an ecosystem, right?
(18:45):
So when when you're able to, youknow, touch down and and
(20:14):
connect, you know, now you havea model of of you know what I'm
saying, of of the network andand for you can yeah, so yeah,
man, I think I think that'sbrilliant.
SPEAKER_00 (20:27):
Yeah, for sure.
You know, that's something thatwe have to be very intentional
and remind ourselves, uh, remindthose family members that are
good at organizing and reallymake things happen.
It doesn't have to be on a grandhuge scale.
We could just start with youknow a handful of family members
at a time and build from that.
(20:47):
So I want to encourage you knowall the listeners out there that
you know family reunions doesnot have to be 400 people, and
you go and you you renting outyou know parks and or or not
renting out parks and justtaking over the grills.
Oh man, right?
You don't even have a permit,but you you using all six grills
(21:07):
at the park, man.
It's supposed to be public.
Cut it out, man.
Knock it off.
But uh in real life, though, Ido love uh those opportunities
that we can take, those are soimportant.
I've I've never been in any typeof family gathering, family
reunion, or whatever the case,and not feel heartwarm.
(21:30):
Oh my heart is always warm.
I'm I'm always happy to see, youknow, even my siblings, and and
you you've witnessed this, youknow, a handful of times, you
know, just the closeness.
And you know, it's like uh eventhough we haven't seen each
other in months and months andmonths, it's like we never
missed a beat when we're inperson.
So I think that's reallyimportant for people to always
(21:52):
keep that connectivity withinyour family and your household
as well, of course.
SPEAKER_01 (21:58):
Yeah, it's it's beautiful.
I ain't gonna lie.
Just sitting here thinking aboutit, reminiscing on them old
days, man.
You know, you get older and it'slike you don't see your folks as
often.
So you have all those, you know,those those great memories of
you know, y'all playing cardgames or board games or or
whatever the case is.
(22:18):
But uh yeah, that's that's whyit's so important to just to
keep the connectivity, keep thatWi-Fi connection going, you
know.
SPEAKER_00 (22:25):
Definitely, definitely.
You know what?
Uh, I I do want to pivot alittle bit.
I want to because I want to makesure that we get enough time for
this specific topic.
Um, I I want to talk about whatleadership looks like now versus
what it looked like then.
Um, and and obviously we'll talkabout a few different
(22:47):
generations, but I still believethe evolution and what is the
opposite of evolution?
Regression?
What is the opposite?
SPEAKER_01 (22:55):
Yeah, that's that's that would be one of those.
Is that fair enough?
Yeah, regression.
SPEAKER_00 (22:59):
So so I want the good, the bad, and ugly when we
talk about leadership, and Iwant to be extremely transparent
and candid about it.
Because leadership, even beforemy time, being, you know, uh a
70s babies, and my parents, youknow, being uh boomers, um, even
(23:19):
leadership to them look a lotdifferent.
It looks a lot different becausethey had you know Martin Luther
King Jr., they had Malcolm X,um, Marcus Garvey, you know,
that maybe a little furtherback, but but they had um, you
know, Jesse Jackson, uh RalphDavid Abernathy, um, you know,
(23:43):
they just had a lot uh going on.
And these people was not playinggames, they put their life on
the line, Jay, to to stand upfor the community, to stand up
for uh for rights, civil rights.
And it's different.
Like uh, and we have to admitthat that it is different, um,
because this generation and someother generations, they they
(24:07):
don't believe in doing all that,so to speak.
They they want to figure outways that they can do things
different, right?
So so now if you talk aboutmarching, uh if you talk about
boycotting, if you if you talkabout doing different
demonstrations, obviously itlooks a lot different than it
(24:29):
did in the 60s in the 70s.
SPEAKER_01 (24:33):
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, you know, with theadvent of things like social
media and all that, we have alot more avenues to kind of
voice our opinions and you knowcongregate or or or rally, or
even just to to spreadawareness, you know what I'm
saying?
Uh about about issues that aregoing on.
SPEAKER_00 (24:52):
Right.
SPEAKER_01 (24:53):
Uh, you mentioned those a lot of the a lot of the
leaders, but you know, I wouldsay a lot some of the leaders of
of today that are kind of doingthat.
Um, you know, you got peoplelike 19 Keys.
I watched a lot of his videos.
Riz of Islam does a good job ofjust you know, just kind of
raising awareness and thingslike that.
There's a guy named uh WallStreet Trapper that's raising
(25:15):
awareness.
So, and and interestinglyenough, these are all uh what
you would call influencers orrole models, and that kind of
goes back to what I was sayingearlier about like we have a
lot, a lot of role models, butI'm not sure if they're doing
any actual uh mentorship um inthe community.
But yeah, so so the leadershipof today is a lot different.
(25:36):
It's not, I don't think it's asuh physical or in person, you
know, it's a lot of you know,people talking about issues or
people um you know, you know,getting mics and maybe doing a
podcast or doing it um uh goinglive about it.
But the actual work, I you know,I would have to agree with you
(25:58):
that um is there is a keydifference there, I would say.
SPEAKER_00 (26:02):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.
And when you think about it, uhit digs a little deeper or did
dig a little deeper back thenbecause we're talking about the
actual household.
They talked about the importanceof having a mother, father in
the household.
They talked about how importantit was to have your grandparents
(26:24):
in your household, right?
So it talked more so about truefamily uh dynamic, like you can
have a household of 20 people,right?
Now listen now, take take thatin perspective.
So in today, our communitylaughs at the the Latinos or the
(26:51):
the uh the Indian and uh theNative American, how they how
they have big households.
They talk about oh man, how yougot 20 people in in your
household like that, right?
So think about it.
We actually started that first.
We started it first in ourculture, you know.
Grandma and granddad, betweenthe two of them, they'd have 20
(27:12):
21 kids, they would have 15kids.
Yeah, everybody had a job to do,so it wasn't like all right,
everybody's just laying aroundand and everybody got to go get
a job.
No, no, they was very uhdomesticated.
Uh, agriculture was huge, um,and just having a skill was was
(27:34):
always, I would say, almostmandatory.
Like you're gonna be doingsomething, right?
You're gonna literally have askill whether you wanted to or
not, whether it is the thelandscaping or or taking care of
the pigs or whatever the caseis, right?
Wash uh washing the farm, theside of the farm, whatever the
(27:55):
case is, everybody had a duty.
So as they gotten older and hadtheir own families, you gotta
follow suit.
And think about this, Jay.
Think about this.
If if you have everyone on thatestate, if you will, on that
farm, uh on that acreage, nowwe're talking about serious
(28:17):
generational wealth.
You're not kicking people out togo get an apartment they can
barely afford just to come backto your house two years later.
Right?
So now we're talking aboutacreage.
We're talking about poolingresources so we can make a can
we can continue to make aconglomerate within our family
(28:42):
structure and dynamic.
We may start out with 10 acres,but if everybody's doing what
they need to do, and we'reraising funds and and and we
have uh you know, we believe ingroup economics, all we're gonna
do is continue to leverage that.
And we're going to have acreagein different cities and
(29:03):
different areas.
We'll expand where we're at, butwe're building, and so and so
now it makes a lot more sensewhen we talk about raising our
kids.
Now they don't have to go to adaycare where we're paying$400,
$450 a week, and and we'retrying to get uh uh help from
(29:23):
the government, and out of$450,they want to pay$75.
Right?
So now we're utilizing grandma,grandpa, great grandma,
great-grandpa.
They're now fulfilled in theirolder years, right?
They're able to see theirgenerations in front of them
(29:45):
instead of oh, well, why mygreat-grandbabies don't come and
see me?
Right, because now they'reraising them, and so now we can
pull again our resources and wecan get whatever we want.
We may start out with a farm,but now guess what?
Since we have money, we haveeducation, we have uh resources,
(30:07):
we have a diversity, uh uh uhyou know, we're diverse within
our own household, and so now wecan have uh a law firm to extend
the legacy.
Now we we can have uh you knowum a medical center, now we can
have uh a security um agency inwithin our own generation.
(30:30):
So to me, man, that's whatlegacy, you know, is all about.
Um just really you know,respecting our elders and uh you
know our neighborhoods, doingour check-ins.
And to me, Jay, that that's oldschool.
That's old school.
SPEAKER_01 (30:47):
Yeah, yeah.
Now you cook.
Now you definitely cook.
But I mean, I don't know.
So if that's old school, whatwas what's new school?
I mean, we don't have, we're notdoing that no more.
Like people aren't living underthe household like that, you
know, doing a farm on theacreage and things like that.
It's it's a lot moreindividualistic.
(31:07):
So I think we've lost the eveneven the concept of that.
You said earlier, you know, welaugh at when we see it like
it's like it's almost uh frownedupon or something like that.
But when really in reality, it'sprobably the smartest thing that
you that you could do as afamily.
SPEAKER_00 (31:27):
Um it has to be.
SPEAKER_01 (31:29):
Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (31:30):
I mean, when you think about it, even being
chastised for having roommates.
Now, I as men, Jay, we we get nomercy.
Nah.
Ladies, you you can all yourgirlfriends, you know, living
living in a four-bedroom,three-bath, it makes sense to
them, right?
They're gonna save, uh, they'regoing to pull their resources
(31:53):
together, they're gonna havegroceries for days, they're
gonna make it happen, they'regonna make that house a home for
each one of those individuals.
Now, you got four guys in afour-bedroom, four bath.
What's that looking like onsocial media?
What they talking about withthat, Jay?
SPEAKER_01 (32:13):
Nah, man.
Yeah, you getting you getting nomercy, man.
You you got roommates, right?
Oh man, nah, you got roommates.
That's crazy.
Like, like it's like you're noteven supposed to do that.
Man, like you're supposed to befully self-sufficient, man.
It's yeah, it's wild.
SPEAKER_00 (32:30):
That's the world we live in, though.
Um, you know, and there's a lotof differences that we have to
admit.
Um, but but one thing that Ifeel like is nostalgic, which
happens with a lot of peoplewhen they go to their
grandparents' house or theirgreat-grandparents' house that
lives out there in the country,that that are uh minimalists,
(32:52):
right?
But they enjoy the non pollutedair, right?
The the excessive electronics,and and uh uh you know, it's
just a simplistic lifestyle thatyou can appreciate.
Birds chirping, bees buzzing,mascara.
SPEAKER_01 (33:10):
Mosquitoes, biking fireflies at night, all that.
SPEAKER_00 (33:14):
All of that, man.
Nobody can say, and I'm I'm justbeing just straight up with
this.
Nobody can say that you don'tget a sense of peace when you go
out there to yourgreat-grandparents, your
grandparents' house.
Number one, it's gonna be adrive.
Oh yeah.
It's gonna be a drive.
And maybe not your parents,because your parents, you know,
(33:35):
they moved into the city forwhatever, but your
great-grandparents and yourgreat-great-grandparents, oh,
you got to go to their land togo see about them, Jay.
SPEAKER_01 (33:45):
You gotta go to the land.
It's a road trip.
SPEAKER_00 (33:50):
It's a road trip, and I and I love that because
when you think about it, man,those are the you know, um,
grandma with the with the thecakes, the homemade meals, sweet
tea, the lemonade.
Man, the food is just differentover there.
She's going out uh to to pick upfresh vegetables out the garden.
(34:12):
You know what I mean?
Like their food is organic.
Oh man, it's it's just a wholedifferent lifestyle.
And you got to think about thoseporch talks, you know, and the
the uh the uh the cookouts, thethe music, everybody dancing,
you know, there's no neighborsfor miles away, so you don't
have to worry about anybodycalling 12.
(34:34):
That's a different life andlifestyle.
And and and one thing that I dohave to mention those
therapeutic talks with theelders.
Oh man, you can absorb so muchwisdom, and sometimes it's not
even a private talk.
You just listen to granddad,great granddad, like for
(34:57):
instance on Father's Day, youlisten to your granddad spit
game, right?
Yeah, drop him.
And he wasn't about, hey, youknow, uh be a ladies' man, don't
settle, don't get me.
He was actually encouragingrelationships and marriage.
He was just saying, you need youbetter vet uh vet better.
That's what you better do, oryou can get caught up in the
(35:18):
matrix.
So he did say that, but justbeing able to allow them to talk
their talk, um, and they don'tmind, like all of the folks,
they they'll talk.
Let them cook.
Hey, they they gonna cook, man.
And look, you you better sitback, relax, and be quiet and uh
(35:41):
soak in that knowledge.
That's your best bet.
SPEAKER_01 (35:44):
Yeah, yeah.
Insight, man.
There's too much insight andwisdom to let go the waste.
I love hearing my elders speak,man.
I, you know, it's it's one ofthose things where, you know,
because I lost um mygreat-grandma a few years back,
and I just kind of reminisceabout her.
And and it could be somethingthat at the time, you know, you
(36:07):
think it's something trivial,but you know, one thing that she
would always do, she would goout in the yard and just just
look at flowers, just look atand and and it took me so long
to understand why she was outthere for so long.
Like she'd be out there for anhour.
Yeah, like man, I'm like, man,where is she?
She yeah, she's out therelooking at me.
(36:29):
Yeah, yeah.
Until I got out there one timeand I did, I'm like, oh, this
this is grounding, this ispeace.
This is you know, just being outin this nature reminds you of of
who you are and and you know,and what you are.
So yeah, but the elders man'swisdom and insight, and never,
never mistake it.
SPEAKER_00 (36:51):
Most definitely, you know, uh, shout out to um, you
know, your grandma, granddad,bob and d malow.
You did this is how you knowit's old school when when they
say their names together.
That's that's how you know.
Uh Mark and Martha, you know,I'm saying uh uh Abigail and
(37:13):
Anthony, Bob and D, like thatlets you know that they're one.
You you only have to try tofigure out if they still married
or they're still togetherbecause you're saying their name
as if it's one, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (37:25):
Package, right?
SPEAKER_00 (37:26):
They packaged up, man.
Speaking of package, look, we'regonna go ahead and wrap up this
show.
And man, listen, we want youguys to continue to give us some
feedback on our show through allour social media platforms.
Uh, we love the fact that youguys are subscribing to our
Patreon.
Uh, we love receiving the emailsof uh of just showing love and
(37:48):
you know, some ideas.
And man, you know, uh support isso important, and we want to
continue to make sure that weare servants and getting the
information out there to you allas well as uh representation.
So I'll tell you what, Jay, wewe may have to we may have to
double up on on this thiscommunity thing.
(38:10):
So I think that we're gonna haveto come back and and talk about
you know some of the things thathave been effective, maybe some
of the things that we can dobetter, some uh actionable steps
that our community and ourlisteners can actually uh
implement in the community.
And uh, you know, just get sometips and and and just you know
(38:31):
be the ones that start theimpact instead of just kind of
waiting around for theleaderships.
SPEAKER_01 (38:37):
Yeah, I love it.
I love it, and I and I knowthey'll love it too.
SPEAKER_00 (38:42):
There it is.
Hey, look, hey, we love youguys.
Check us out next episode Popsand Sun Conversations your
favorites Hill Fox, Rob Malloy.
Javen aka check three times.
Hey, and we'll see you guys nexttime.
Be blessed, we out.
Okay, welcome to another episode of Pops and Sun
Conversations.
As per usual, it is yourfavorite Sylvan Fox, Robin
Lloyd.
SPEAKER_01 (01:58):
And it's Javen, aka Tech 3 Times.
SPEAKER_00 (02:02):
There it is.
And welcome to another episode.
Jay, how you feeling today?
SPEAKER_01 (02:07):
I feel good.
You know, I feel good.
How about yourself, Pop?
SPEAKER_00 (02:11):
I'm good.
And the reason why I say thatis, you know, we just got
through June, men's month, men'smental health awareness month.
And uh hopefully all is notforgotten.
You know, all the support, youknow, all of the clickbait.
You know, hopefully we didn'tjust have bandwagoners that have
(02:32):
hopped off already because youknow we're in June now.
So I mean we're in July now.
So hopefully, you know, we'vewe've met some very uh strong
allies, if you will, when itcomes to uh the support of us
men, because you know we needit, man.
You know, we need to pretty bad.
So, you know, I was thinkingabout, you know, since we're in
(02:54):
heavy into uh July, um, you knowwhen it comes to the patriotism
and and things like that, inJuly, man, I think that there is
a lot of identity crisis goingon, you know, people trying to
figure out, okay, what did whatdoes the holidays really mean?
(03:17):
You know, uh, what's behind it?
You know, uh, why are wecelebrating?
Do we have the right?
Are we uh you know celebratingappropriately?
Yeah, you know, um, is this justyou know, is this just a pagan
holiday?
You know, whatever the case is,you know, July is one of those
months where you kind of thinkabout I what what does this
(03:40):
really mean to me, culturally,historically, you know, uh
community-wise, ancestrally.
So uh so I kind of want to digin a little bit about the home,
the family dynamic, and youknow, just maybe we can we can
name it like home is where theheart is.
(04:01):
Oh, yeah.
Right?
Home is where the heart is, youknow.
We're not trying to do aHallmark card, you know, but we
are trying to make sure that wewe do realize the importance of
home because Jay, let's let'sjust be real.
We hear more about broken homesthan we do about homes that are
actually staying together andcreating legacy.
(04:23):
Am I right or wrong?
Nah, you're right.
You're right when you're right.
Hey, broken homes is a topic, atrending topic, right?
But uh, you know, we have toreally talk about you know the
dynamic of the homes becausethere's a lot of homes that are
doing um a lot of the rightthings.
You know, I remember growing up,we would we would kind of stress
(04:48):
about the importance of stayingin that industry or staying in
that field.
And what I mean by that, Jay, isyou know, your great-granddad,
he he he, you know, uh, or yourgranddad is in the navy, right?
So so I went into the military.
Uh my sister went into theMarines.
Um, none of y'all went into themilitary.
(05:10):
I ain't mad at y'all though,right?
SPEAKER_01 (05:13):
I wanted to, though.
SPEAKER_00 (05:15):
Right, right.
But I I wouldn't I wouldn't havebeen mad either way, because you
know, uh, there's a lot ofevolution, but at the same time,
there's always those intricaciesof the unknown.
So you don't know what wouldhappen if you did go in, even if
it was something that you wantedto do, uh, meaning job-wise, if
you wanted to travel and thingslike that.
(05:36):
So um, but me growing up, man, Iremember it that it was so
stressed that you follow in thefootsteps of your family.
So if there, if you're a familyof lawyers, you better get ready
to go to law school.
I don't care if you want to playuh basketball, if you want to
(05:58):
become uh uh an athlete or ifyou want to do something
different, you go into lawschool.
Uh, your mama, your daddy wentto law school, your great
granddaddy went to law, you gointo law school.
Now you can figure out after youget your law degree what you
want to do after you get yourpractice, what you could do on
the side, but no, you you'reabout to be a lawyer, you're
(06:20):
about to be in law enforcement,you're about to be in politics,
you you're about to be insports.
Even sports, man, even thelineage of sports goes a long
way.
So, you know, so let me ask you,Jason, what do you think when it
comes to you know the parentsbeing the first leaders and
(06:43):
being that example in thehousehold?
Do you think that that is a goodthing because they're paving a
paving the way?
Or do you think that could betraumatic because of the
pressure of uh of thegenerations afterwards?
SPEAKER_01 (06:59):
Oh yeah.
Yeah, you know, it's it's one ofthose things where it could go
um either way.
And it's really a lot of timesit's gonna be on the parent to
kind of foster um what thechild's reaction is gonna be.
But I do think overall, um it'sa good thing, though, because
either way, there's some type ofstructure there, or there's some
(07:20):
type of influence.
I would rather have been in ahousehold where uh my parents
did something for me that theythought was gonna be in my best
interest, and maybe I didn'tnecessarily agree with it 100%.
But I mean, I don't think it'sanybody, anybody out there
that's uh mad that they have auh a law degree or that's mad
that they got, you know, theirdoctor or nurse or whatever the
(07:42):
case, or or they're playing um,you know, in the NBA because
their parents were so hard onthem.
Like that I don't think they'remad at that.
But um, you know, at the sametime, it just gotta be something
that that the parents are areconsiderate about.
But that on that flip side whereyou talk about the pressures, uh
man, yeah, I I I can see thattoo.
(08:03):
So overall, I I think it'sprobably for the best, and I
think a lot of parents do domean well, right?
But you know, it's you know,it's just it's just one of those
things, kind of case by case.
But overall, I think they meanwell, and I think it's probably
better just for that structure,you know.
SPEAKER_00 (08:19):
Yeah, I'll add to that because not only the the
structure, because that's that'swhat they know, right?
Uh there's routines, uh, there'sa blueprint to be able to be
successful in in that that lane,but also you got to think about
the resources, the people thatthey come across, right?
(08:41):
The business owners, the the uhthe CEOs, the VPs, you know, the
the connections.
And so really it's a it's agreat opportunity to have that
under your belt because eveneven with that, even having that
structure, the access toresources, there's always gonna
(09:01):
be that black sheep that's notgonna want to do none of that.
SPEAKER_01 (09:04):
Yeah, right?
SPEAKER_00 (09:05):
There's always gonna be, and even if it even if it's
a black sheet moment, like youknow what, now I don't want to
do that, I want to figure it outon on my own.
Thank you for paving the way forme to do that, but I don't want
to do that at all.
And so what can happen then isthey uh uh the the parents may
(09:27):
feel like, hey, you know what,you you're breaking up the
legacy here, right?
And plus you're you're not evenuh a master at what you're
talking about.
So if you want to be a musician,right, you want you want to do
something completely different,you want to be an actor, you
know, you want to go into youknow, maybe uh a different type
of vocation, uh school orsomething like that, they're
(09:51):
gonna feel like you're offcourse, but they're also gonna
feel like they can't help you.
And so I want I want to kind ofdig into the difference between
a role model and a mentor.
Um, that this is one of myfavorite subjects I like to talk
about.
Uh, you know, we just recentlylaunched uh a mentor a
(10:11):
mentorship program, uh startingwith young men at 12 years old,
um, called the EG League.
So you guys can go to Pops andSun and kind of get some more
information.
But you know, I love talking tothe to the youth about the
difference between a role modeland a uh and a mentor.
(10:33):
So, Jay, when when you thinkabout it, what what comes to
mind of the importance of both?
Because I do feel like both havetheir place.
But what do you think is thedifference, or what comes to
mind when you think about bothof them?
SPEAKER_01 (10:50):
So, right off the bat, I feel like role models are
more of like your publicfigures.
Mentors are gonna be yourpersonal ones, right?
So your role models, uh, theremight be somebody, and you know,
this this phrase has been coineduh recently, your influencers.
It may be an influencer youfollow online that you just
(11:10):
think is somebody cool, and youcan maybe you identify with
them.
Uh they you see something inthem that you don't uh or you or
like I said, you identify.
So, you know, maybe they'rethey're doing something that you
do that you don't see a lotaround you, or a lot of your
friends don't do.
So it it kind of makes you feelum, you know, a little bit more
(11:30):
accepted or like, okay, this ismaybe I'm not this this weirdo
that like that's into such andsuch because this person I see
is into it as well.
But um a mentor, on the otherhand, you know, that's somebody
that, like I said, it's it's alot more personal.
That's gonna be somebody whosees your potential and um is
(11:51):
even gonna hold you accountableto it.
Um, you know, they'll give youfeedback.
Um, you know, like a coach is isis another good uh another good
term I like to think of when youthink about what coaches do, you
know, to their players, like howthey um, you know, maybe
sometimes be a little bit hardon them, but it's only because
they want to bring the best outof them and they see the
(12:14):
potential and they want to helpthem grow.
SPEAKER_00 (12:16):
Yeah, yeah, I agree with you 1,000%.
Uh I always tell this storyanytime I talk about mentorship
and role models.
I remember being booked to uh tohost a rooftop party in uh
Minneapolis, uh, Minnesota.
And it was a bunch of ladies.
I'm not gonna lie, man.
It was probably about eight toten ladies that was in this area
(12:41):
that I was in the lobby of thehotel because the rooftop was at
that hotel.
And then there was like one guy.
So I'm looking at the dude like,hey man, you you got to stay
here.
Like, we got to be eye to eye,we got to be on the same page,
even if it's just for thismoment.
Set aside our differences andhow you feel.
We got to be on the same page.
And I remember, you know, theconversation just talking about
(13:04):
the difference between, youknow, um, a role model and a
mentor, and really I was talkingmore so the importance of a
mentor in our communities,because a role model, you can
you can have a role model besomeone that you see or in and
never meet, it could be anathlete, it could be an actor,
it could be an author, um, itcould be somebody who you know
(13:28):
you is really popular, and thatcould be a role model, but that
role model isn't necessarilytaking you through the steps of
success in whatever you'reinterested in, and so that's
where a mentor comes into playbecause they specialize in
(13:48):
helping you navigate throughwhatever you're interested in.
And so if your dad sells cars,if if if your dad is a mechanic
and you want to get into IT,well your daddy can't help you.
Meaning he can't teach you, butI think what he can do is he can
(14:10):
bridge the gap and get youaccess to that resource.
Bridge the gap and introduce youto a mentor.
I think that will be extremelypowerful versus feeling like, oh
well, he ain't your daddy, orI'ma always be your dad.
And you know what I mean?
And that can kind of defuse anytype of animosity when it comes
(14:35):
to that kid or that young adultreally wanting to thrive in that
field and not feeling likethey're gonna disappoint their
parents because they're notgoing into whatever uh that
industry is through the lineage.
So I think that that's extremelypowerful.
Um, mentorship is not easy, likein order to be a mentor, like
(14:59):
you have to go throughmentorship yourself.
So you have to know what thatprocess is like, you have to
understand that each individualis gonna be different.
People have different learningcurves, and you have to be
extremely flexible with allthese different personalities.
SPEAKER_01 (15:17):
Yeah.
Yeah, I agree.
I think that today, um, I thinkwe have a lot more role models
than than mentors.
I think we we definitely have alack of mentors.
And I think even that, you know,when we talk about the
generations, I think there's a adisconnect there.
You know, I'm not even sure ifum, you know, they understand
(15:41):
what you know what a mentor isor or or how to how to find one
or how to seek one out or or youknow how to um to to even go
about that, you know what Imean?
So yeah, it's it's it'sdefinitely something that you
know there's there's gotta besomething done.
You know what I mean?
And I know there's there'sdifferent there's different
(16:03):
programs, and I and and youknow, I think we'll probably get
into that a little bit later inthe conversation.
But um, yeah, I I agree with you100%, Pops.
Um mentorship definitely gottauh be on the forefront,
something that we got to to keepto keep pushing in and having
conversations about.
SPEAKER_00 (16:20):
You have those conversations, and I think that
these are the type of thingsthat we need to look at when
when we're doing the familyreunions, and that that's even
sounds foreign, right?
Like when's the last time youwent to a family reunion of
yours?
Yeah, I ain't talking about agood friend of yours that said
that you know they're gonna becooking, ribs, and everything.
I'm talking about actually yourfamily reunions, and family
(16:44):
reunions don't have to be eight,nine generations and don't have
to be 200 to 300 people, youknow, at the cookout with
t-shirts on, right?
Family reunion can can literallybe that people that you have not
met in your in your uh lineage,in your family tree.
Um, it could be just everybodybeing at the same place at one
(17:06):
time for a change.
Like those to me are familyreunions that truly matter.
So when we we get into that,when we talk about the parents
being the leaders, that'ssomething that we need to hold
ourselves accountable for.
Like, you know, uh, I want tosee my aunts and uncles and
cousins and siblings because youknow they're adults and they
(17:29):
live in different states.
And let's let's make this happenbecause it's so easy to get
caught up in your own familydynamic, and and you guys are
you know going to the lake andyou guys are going to to uh you
know the mountains and andtaking trips across seas and
stuff like that when you have awhole generation that truly may
(17:50):
need you, and at some point youmay need them.
Now you're in their city, nowyou're in their state.
Now you realize you have acousin who's the mayor.
Now you realize that you have auh a celebrity stylist aunt.
Now you now you have, you know,uh Mr.
Check three times in Atlanta.
SPEAKER_01 (18:09):
Yeah, connect the dots.
SPEAKER_00 (18:11):
Can I come to one of your shows or something, bro?
What's happening?
SPEAKER_01 (18:14):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
See, that's that's you know,that's so important when we when
see connecting those dotsthough, right?
SPEAKER_00 (18:21):
Right.
SPEAKER_01 (18:21):
This is um, you know, this, but but this is also
something that that I think alot of people just, you know, it
is is lost on them.
And we talked about thatstructure earlier about in the
household, but this is another,this is like another uh just
like expansion of that, right?
It's not even a structure, it'smore like a an ecosystem, right?
(18:45):
So when when you're able to, youknow, touch down and and
(20:14):
connect, you know, now you havea model of of you know what I'm
saying, of of the network andand for you can yeah, so yeah,
man, I think I think that'sbrilliant.
SPEAKER_00 (20:27):
Yeah, for sure.
You know, that's something thatwe have to be very intentional
and remind ourselves, uh, remindthose family members that are
good at organizing and reallymake things happen.
It doesn't have to be on a grandhuge scale.
We could just start with youknow a handful of family members
at a time and build from that.
(20:47):
So I want to encourage you knowall the listeners out there that
you know family reunions doesnot have to be 400 people, and
you go and you you renting outyou know parks and or or not
renting out parks and justtaking over the grills.
Oh man, right?
You don't even have a permit,but you you using all six grills
(21:07):
at the park, man.
It's supposed to be public.
Cut it out, man.
Knock it off.
But uh in real life, though, Ido love uh those opportunities
that we can take, those are soimportant.
I've I've never been in any typeof family gathering, family
reunion, or whatever the case,and not feel heartwarm.
(21:30):
Oh my heart is always warm.
I'm I'm always happy to see, youknow, even my siblings, and and
you you've witnessed this, youknow, a handful of times, you
know, just the closeness.
And you know, it's like uh eventhough we haven't seen each
other in months and months andmonths, it's like we never
missed a beat when we're inperson.
So I think that's reallyimportant for people to always
(21:52):
keep that connectivity withinyour family and your household
as well, of course.
SPEAKER_01 (21:58):
Yeah, it's it's beautiful.
I ain't gonna lie.
Just sitting here thinking aboutit, reminiscing on them old
days, man.
You know, you get older and it'slike you don't see your folks as
often.
So you have all those, you know,those those great memories of
you know, y'all playing cardgames or board games or or
whatever the case is.
(22:18):
But uh yeah, that's that's whyit's so important to just to
keep the connectivity, keep thatWi-Fi connection going, you
know.
SPEAKER_00 (22:25):
Definitely, definitely.
You know what?
Uh, I I do want to pivot alittle bit.
I want to because I want to makesure that we get enough time for
this specific topic.
Um, I I want to talk about whatleadership looks like now versus
what it looked like then.
Um, and and obviously we'll talkabout a few different
(22:47):
generations, but I still believethe evolution and what is the
opposite of evolution?
Regression?
What is the opposite?
SPEAKER_01 (22:55):
Yeah, that's that's that would be one of those.
Is that fair enough?
Yeah, regression.
SPEAKER_00 (22:59):
So so I want the good, the bad, and ugly when we
talk about leadership, and Iwant to be extremely transparent
and candid about it.
Because leadership, even beforemy time, being, you know, uh a
70s babies, and my parents, youknow, being uh boomers, um, even
(23:19):
leadership to them look a lotdifferent.
It looks a lot different becausethey had you know Martin Luther
King Jr., they had Malcolm X,um, Marcus Garvey, you know,
that maybe a little furtherback, but but they had um, you
know, Jesse Jackson, uh RalphDavid Abernathy, um, you know,
(23:43):
they just had a lot uh going on.
And these people was not playinggames, they put their life on
the line, Jay, to to stand upfor the community, to stand up
for uh for rights, civil rights.
And it's different.
Like uh, and we have to admitthat that it is different, um,
because this generation and someother generations, they they
(24:07):
don't believe in doing all that,so to speak.
They they want to figure outways that they can do things
different, right?
So so now if you talk aboutmarching, uh if you talk about
boycotting, if you if you talkabout doing different
demonstrations, obviously itlooks a lot different than it
(24:29):
did in the 60s in the 70s.
SPEAKER_01 (24:33):
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, you know, with theadvent of things like social
media and all that, we have alot more avenues to kind of
voice our opinions and you knowcongregate or or or rally, or
even just to to spreadawareness, you know what I'm
saying?
Uh about about issues that aregoing on.
SPEAKER_00 (24:52):
Right.
SPEAKER_01 (24:53):
Uh, you mentioned those a lot of the a lot of the
leaders, but you know, I wouldsay a lot some of the leaders of
of today that are kind of doingthat.
Um, you know, you got peoplelike 19 Keys.
I watched a lot of his videos.
Riz of Islam does a good job ofjust you know, just kind of
raising awareness and thingslike that.
There's a guy named uh WallStreet Trapper that's raising
(25:15):
awareness.
So, and and interestinglyenough, these are all uh what
you would call influencers orrole models, and that kind of
goes back to what I was sayingearlier about like we have a
lot, a lot of role models, butI'm not sure if they're doing
any actual uh mentorship um inthe community.
But yeah, so so the leadershipof today is a lot different.
(25:36):
It's not, I don't think it's asuh physical or in person, you
know, it's a lot of you know,people talking about issues or
people um you know, you know,getting mics and maybe doing a
podcast or doing it um uh goinglive about it.
But the actual work, I you know,I would have to agree with you
(25:58):
that um is there is a keydifference there, I would say.
SPEAKER_00 (26:02):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.
And when you think about it, uhit digs a little deeper or did
dig a little deeper back thenbecause we're talking about the
actual household.
They talked about the importanceof having a mother, father in
the household.
They talked about how importantit was to have your grandparents
(26:24):
in your household, right?
So it talked more so about truefamily uh dynamic, like you can
have a household of 20 people,right?
Now listen now, take take thatin perspective.
So in today, our communitylaughs at the the Latinos or the
(26:51):
the uh the Indian and uh theNative American, how they how
they have big households.
They talk about oh man, how yougot 20 people in in your
household like that, right?
So think about it.
We actually started that first.
We started it first in ourculture, you know.
Grandma and granddad, betweenthe two of them, they'd have 20
(27:12):
21 kids, they would have 15kids.
Yeah, everybody had a job to do,so it wasn't like all right,
everybody's just laying aroundand and everybody got to go get
a job.
No, no, they was very uhdomesticated.
Uh, agriculture was huge, um,and just having a skill was was
(27:34):
always, I would say, almostmandatory.
Like you're gonna be doingsomething, right?
You're gonna literally have askill whether you wanted to or
not, whether it is the thelandscaping or or taking care of
the pigs or whatever the caseis, right?
Wash uh washing the farm, theside of the farm, whatever the
(27:55):
case is, everybody had a duty.
So as they gotten older and hadtheir own families, you gotta
follow suit.
And think about this, Jay.
Think about this.
If if you have everyone on thatestate, if you will, on that
farm, uh on that acreage, nowwe're talking about serious
(28:17):
generational wealth.
You're not kicking people out togo get an apartment they can
barely afford just to come backto your house two years later.
Right?
So now we're talking aboutacreage.
We're talking about poolingresources so we can make a can
we can continue to make aconglomerate within our family
(28:42):
structure and dynamic.
We may start out with 10 acres,but if everybody's doing what
they need to do, and we'reraising funds and and and we
have uh you know, we believe ingroup economics, all we're gonna
do is continue to leverage that.
And we're going to have acreagein different cities and
(29:03):
different areas.
We'll expand where we're at, butwe're building, and so and so
now it makes a lot more sensewhen we talk about raising our
kids.
Now they don't have to go to adaycare where we're paying$400,
$450 a week, and and we'retrying to get uh uh help from
(29:23):
the government, and out of$450,they want to pay$75.
Right?
So now we're utilizing grandma,grandpa, great grandma,
great-grandpa.
They're now fulfilled in theirolder years, right?
They're able to see theirgenerations in front of them
(29:45):
instead of oh, well, why mygreat-grandbabies don't come and
see me?
Right, because now they'reraising them, and so now we can
pull again our resources and wecan get whatever we want.
We may start out with a farm,but now guess what?
Since we have money, we haveeducation, we have uh resources,
(30:07):
we have a diversity, uh uh uhyou know, we're diverse within
our own household, and so now wecan have uh a law firm to extend
the legacy.
Now we we can have uh you knowum a medical center, now we can
have uh a security um agency inwithin our own generation.
(30:30):
So to me, man, that's whatlegacy, you know, is all about.
Um just really you know,respecting our elders and uh you
know our neighborhoods, doingour check-ins.
And to me, Jay, that that's oldschool.
That's old school.
SPEAKER_01 (30:47):
Yeah, yeah.
Now you cook.
Now you definitely cook.
But I mean, I don't know.
So if that's old school, whatwas what's new school?
I mean, we don't have, we're notdoing that no more.
Like people aren't living underthe household like that, you
know, doing a farm on theacreage and things like that.
It's it's a lot moreindividualistic.
(31:07):
So I think we've lost the eveneven the concept of that.
You said earlier, you know, welaugh at when we see it like
it's like it's almost uh frownedupon or something like that.
But when really in reality, it'sprobably the smartest thing that
you that you could do as afamily.
SPEAKER_00 (31:27):
Um it has to be.
SPEAKER_01 (31:29):
Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (31:30):
I mean, when you think about it, even being
chastised for having roommates.
Now, I as men, Jay, we we get nomercy.
Nah.
Ladies, you you can all yourgirlfriends, you know, living
living in a four-bedroom,three-bath, it makes sense to
them, right?
They're gonna save, uh, they'regoing to pull their resources
(31:53):
together, they're gonna havegroceries for days, they're
gonna make it happen, they'regonna make that house a home for
each one of those individuals.
Now, you got four guys in afour-bedroom, four bath.
What's that looking like onsocial media?
What they talking about withthat, Jay?
SPEAKER_01 (32:13):
Nah, man.
Yeah, you getting you getting nomercy, man.
You you got roommates, right?
Oh man, nah, you got roommates.
That's crazy.
Like, like it's like you're noteven supposed to do that.
Man, like you're supposed to befully self-sufficient, man.
It's yeah, it's wild.
SPEAKER_00 (32:30):
That's the world we live in, though.
Um, you know, and there's a lotof differences that we have to
admit.
Um, but but one thing that Ifeel like is nostalgic, which
happens with a lot of peoplewhen they go to their
grandparents' house or theirgreat-grandparents' house that
lives out there in the country,that that are uh minimalists,
(32:52):
right?
But they enjoy the non pollutedair, right?
The the excessive electronics,and and uh uh you know, it's
just a simplistic lifestyle thatyou can appreciate.
Birds chirping, bees buzzing,mascara.
SPEAKER_01 (33:10):
Mosquitoes, biking fireflies at night, all that.
SPEAKER_00 (33:14):
All of that, man.
Nobody can say, and I'm I'm justbeing just straight up with
this.
Nobody can say that you don'tget a sense of peace when you go
out there to yourgreat-grandparents, your
grandparents' house.
Number one, it's gonna be adrive.
Oh yeah.
It's gonna be a drive.
And maybe not your parents,because your parents, you know,
(33:35):
they moved into the city forwhatever, but your
great-grandparents and yourgreat-great-grandparents, oh,
you got to go to their land togo see about them, Jay.
SPEAKER_01 (33:45):
You gotta go to the land.
It's a road trip.
SPEAKER_00 (33:50):
It's a road trip, and I and I love that because
when you think about it, man,those are the you know, um,
grandma with the with the thecakes, the homemade meals, sweet
tea, the lemonade.
Man, the food is just differentover there.
She's going out uh to to pick upfresh vegetables out the garden.
(34:12):
You know what I mean?
Like their food is organic.
Oh man, it's it's just a wholedifferent lifestyle.
And you got to think about thoseporch talks, you know, and the
the uh the uh the cookouts, thethe music, everybody dancing,
you know, there's no neighborsfor miles away, so you don't
have to worry about anybodycalling 12.
(34:34):
That's a different life andlifestyle.
And and and one thing that I dohave to mention those
therapeutic talks with theelders.
Oh man, you can absorb so muchwisdom, and sometimes it's not
even a private talk.
You just listen to granddad,great granddad, like for
(34:57):
instance on Father's Day, youlisten to your granddad spit
game, right?
Yeah, drop him.
And he wasn't about, hey, youknow, uh be a ladies' man, don't
settle, don't get me.
He was actually encouragingrelationships and marriage.
He was just saying, you need youbetter vet uh vet better.
That's what you better do, oryou can get caught up in the
(35:18):
matrix.
So he did say that, but justbeing able to allow them to talk
their talk, um, and they don'tmind, like all of the folks,
they they'll talk.
Let them cook.
Hey, they they gonna cook, man.
And look, you you better sitback, relax, and be quiet and uh
(35:41):
soak in that knowledge.
That's your best bet.
SPEAKER_01 (35:44):
Yeah, yeah.
Insight, man.
There's too much insight andwisdom to let go the waste.
I love hearing my elders speak,man.
I, you know, it's it's one ofthose things where, you know,
because I lost um mygreat-grandma a few years back,
and I just kind of reminisceabout her.
And and it could be somethingthat at the time, you know, you
(36:07):
think it's something trivial,but you know, one thing that she
would always do, she would goout in the yard and just just
look at flowers, just look atand and and it took me so long
to understand why she was outthere for so long.
Like she'd be out there for anhour.
Yeah, like man, I'm like, man,where is she?
She yeah, she's out therelooking at me.
(36:29):
Yeah, yeah.
Until I got out there one timeand I did, I'm like, oh, this
this is grounding, this ispeace.
This is you know, just being outin this nature reminds you of of
who you are and and you know,and what you are.
So yeah, but the elders man'swisdom and insight, and never,
never mistake it.
SPEAKER_00 (36:51):
Most definitely, you know, uh, shout out to um, you
know, your grandma, granddad,bob and d malow.
You did this is how you knowit's old school when when they
say their names together.
That's that's how you know.
Uh Mark and Martha, you know,I'm saying uh uh Abigail and
(37:13):
Anthony, Bob and D, like thatlets you know that they're one.
You you only have to try tofigure out if they still married
or they're still togetherbecause you're saying their name
as if it's one, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (37:25):
Package, right?
SPEAKER_00 (37:26):
They packaged up, man.
Speaking of package, look, we'regonna go ahead and wrap up this
show.
And man, listen, we want youguys to continue to give us some
feedback on our show through allour social media platforms.
Uh, we love the fact that youguys are subscribing to our
Patreon.
Uh, we love receiving the emailsof uh of just showing love and
(37:48):
you know, some ideas.
And man, you know, uh support isso important, and we want to
continue to make sure that weare servants and getting the
information out there to you allas well as uh representation.
So I'll tell you what, Jay, wewe may have to we may have to
double up on on this thiscommunity thing.
(38:10):
So I think that we're gonna haveto come back and and talk about
you know some of the things thathave been effective, maybe some
of the things that we can dobetter, some uh actionable steps
that our community and ourlisteners can actually uh
implement in the community.
And uh, you know, just get sometips and and and just you know
(38:31):
be the ones that start theimpact instead of just kind of
waiting around for theleaderships.
SPEAKER_01 (38:37):
Yeah, I love it.
I love it, and I and I knowthey'll love it too.
SPEAKER_00 (38:42):
There it is.
Hey, look, hey, we love youguys.
Check us out next episode Popsand Sun Conversations your
favorites Hill Fox, Rob Malloy.
Javen aka check three times.
Hey, and we'll see you guys nexttime.
Be blessed, we out.
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