August 5, 2024 • 47 mins
What happens when you combine the thrill of skydiving with the journey of newlywed life? Join us as Naomi and Maurice recount their first eight months of marriage, from the exhilarating engagement that involved Naomi leaping out of a plane to navigating the joys and challenges of their new life together. You'll hear about their transition from living with their parents to ruling their own castle, and how they manage to balance adventure with adult responsibilities.
Check out their original hysterical episodes:
Episode 15: Positioned for Love Success Story: Naomi and Maurice
Episode 14: Positioned for Love Success Story: Naomi
One of the key takeaways from our chat with Naomi and Maurice is the importance of prioritizing the relationship over the need to be right. From personal stories about heated arguments to the benefits of marriage preparation programs like Positioned for Love, we explore how they’ve learned to compromise and work as a team. Reflecting on their adventures from dating to marriage, they offer humorous and heartfelt stories that underscore the significance of stepping out of comfort zones and embracing new experiences—together.
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Join the waiting list for Positioned for Love - Ready to find the love you've prayed for and deserve? Join Kimberly's Positioned For Love program, tailored for single Christian women, and gain exclusive early access to our next enrollment.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I love God.
All right, all right, welcometo the position podcast.
I am Kimberly Knight and I amhere to catch up with the
newlyweds, naomi and Maurice.
Oh shucks, now how y'all doing.
We're doing great.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
We're doing awesome Woo.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Wow, I'll take the woo woo.
Eight months now, yeah, eightmonths, yeah.
So you gotta catch us up.
Tell us how this first eightmonths has been.
It hasn't even been a year, soy'all, it's still some brand
spanking new.
How has this first eight monthsbeen?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
ladies first yeah it has been, I would say, an
adjustment, because we I mean wedid it old school from the
beginning, so you know I wasstill living with my parents.
He asked for my hand, so movingout.
Yes, yes, girl so moving outand now having your own place,
your own space, it's like Idon't know, we're king and queen
(01:08):
of the castle and it's justlike it's awesome, we're never
going back.
I hope not, no no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
We can listen, we can be free in our house without
restrictions and I thank God forthat.
Hey glory.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Hey glory.
So this is where I say andthose who listen to me regularly
know that sometimes I say thisToday may be a headphone day.
So, just in case you havechildren you don't want to give
a new education to, this may bea headphone day Cause you know,
(01:53):
all right, if you know, you know, and if you don't, well,
headphones anyway, all righty'all.
So y'all enjoying your, yourmarried freedom and each other,
and you're still smiling andjoking.
We had a really good timebefore we started taping.
So I know y'all are stillhaving a good time and I still
(02:14):
say you had my baby jumping outof a plane and I'm still not OK
with that.
If y'all haven't heard thematter of fact, not even the
first interview, it ended upbeing two interviews because it
was just so outrageous that wehad to do two interviews when
they got engaged.
So go back and listen to those.
I will leave a link in the shownotes.
But he had this baby jumpingout of a plane.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
When they got engaged .
Speaker 2 (02:37):
That's right.
Listen, sometimes you got totake a leap of faith.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Boy bye.
She was all for it too.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
She's like hey, in the future.
You know what I'm saying.
And because she took a leap offaith, this is what we the
reward she has, the fruit, thefruit of the Of her labor, the
labor.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Yeah, there you go, the fruit of her labor.
Oh my gosh.
Well, I am hoping that well.
First of all, I'm glad youlanded without incident, because
that would have been something.
Speaker 3 (03:09):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Because, maurice, we would have come for you.
There's a whole bunch ofaunties going mm-hmm, Made our
baby jump out of a plane, girl.
This that goes back to you.
Remember when we were kids andyour mom would say if everybody
was jumping off the bridge,would you jump?
Speaker 3 (03:32):
well, apparently you would I've been only after the
right man not any of theshenanigans.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Like I said I wanted you know someone really like, uh
, um, a extremeness like myselfand adventurous and spontaneous,
and I didn't want no one boringand so she passed the ultimate
test and so because of that, youknow I was the, you know she
met my wife and so it's abeautiful thing because I
(04:02):
skateboard and you know it's fun.
Oh, I didn't know youskateboard.
Yeah, yeah, I actually taughther a little bit.
She rolled a little bit on theskateboard, a little.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
He's the expert.
We'll leave him the expert.
Yeah, she was actually myfilmer.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Yeah, see, that's my role too.
When y'all are jumping out ofstuff, I'm on the ground, I
ground.
I'm on the ground making surethe EMTs know where we are and
that there's video and all thatkind of stuff, I'm not jumping
out enough.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Oh no, I'm one and done.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
Oh, that was it.
That was it for you.
Speaker 3 (04:33):
No, no, no, the roller coasters.
No, that was it.
I'm one and done.
What did she say?
Speaker 2 (04:39):
She wasn't going to do bungee jumping.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
She wasn't going to do bungee jumping.
She wasn't going to do bungeejumping.
Oh, we're not bungee jumping.
We want y'all to get to thatfirst anniversary.
Y'all started off really,really exciting and that was
really different, right?
So what other surprises hasmarriage brought?
Because I know for me there waslike that first year was like,
oh, we didn't think about that.
Or oh, wow, I didn't know.
You know, we, we need to checkin on it with each other about
that.
So what kind of surprises cameup for y'all?
Speaker 3 (05:13):
well, um, he has.
So it's definitely been anadventure with him from the
beginning, I think, learning todo adult stuff, because we did a
lot of the fun stuff, datingsitting down and like wait a
minute, knowing when to say yesand no, because now you're a
(05:33):
unit, right.
So you got both sides OK, youwant to go to this, want to go
to this.
You got friends and everyone'sexcited but we're like, ok, but
we also have to realize what'srealistic for us what do we say
yes?
to what do we say no?
Not just to not just exhaustourselves, but also budget-wise,
yeah, realistic wise.
Because I'd be the type in thebeginning I was like, yeah, yeah
(05:56):
, let's do that.
Yeah, yeah, well, let's try tobook um events with both parties
.
We'll do like half a day overthere.
He goes don't double book us.
He goes that's too much for us.
And I'm like, oh yeah, wait,it's like my mind gets excited.
But then he helps me, likeground me, like baby, you're
gonna be tired.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
So let's just do some balance yeah yeah, this is all
about you know um wisdom.
You know not just the head andthe heart and just kind of like
wisdom and the finances, wisdomhave a wisdom and and and just
and everything like timemanagement you know, because you
(06:35):
get money back, you can't gettime back and um.
And so I learned for myself thatthat you know, um, I can't,
just because when I was singleand everything and I was, you
know, even engaged because weweren't living together,
obviously, when engaged, youknow, I, I can just get in the
car and leave and go to the gymor go to just go to a skate park
(06:56):
, whatever.
But I now, I, I actually haveto tell her where I'm going and
like if, because it was, youknow, even like, even if I do go
, if she don't mind if I go, Ijust gotta just let her know,
hey, I'm going, and like if,because you know, even like,
even if I do go, if she don'tmind if I go, I just gotta just
let her know.
Hey, babe, I'm going, xyz, I'llcome right back, or because she
won't spend that intimate timewith me or she want to, you know
, do things around theneighborhood, take a walk, or I
(07:17):
can't just just go in my car anddip, you know, yeah, yeah, I
learned that myself.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Uh, oh, you know yeah , so I learned that myself.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Uh-oh, you know, yeah , so I had to swerve that right
back around, bring that car backinto the garage, right?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
So, yeah, that is a big adjustment, because now
having to say to that otherperson and take that other
person into consideration, it'snot about permission, it's more
about consideration.
Yeah Right, and then how do wespend our time?
I think you know it's funnybecause with most newlyweds I'm
hearing the same thing the, theneed to figure out how we're
going to spend our time, whatwe're going to do, what we're
not going to do, and how do youspend time with family and
friends?
Cause you know you still, youwant to be part of your
community, but you're alsobuilding your own home, right.
(08:00):
So there's that like thatbalance.
But I'm hearing y'all have beenalso weathering.
Oh.
The other thing I really wantedto say, too, is I'm glad I
always share this and I'm gladthat you're being wise with your
money, because money troublesbreak up more couples than
infidelity, oh yeah.
So being wise with your moneyis so key, so okay.
(08:25):
So I'm glad to hear that anychallenges that you've had that
kind of were like oh, what youwant to answer this one.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
I don't know if there's a job, I guess okay.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Well, so with her, um , I know that she graduated with
a master's degree and shegraduated with, you know, my
master's degree and she wasreally good in, like her english
and uh and a lot of subject,and we're some good certain
things too.
So with me I learned that youknow, if when I communicate I
(09:03):
got effective communicating, notjust community, effectively
communicate, like, actually,like have like the whole, like
how can I simplify everything?
yeah, simplify everything downand just kind of like address
those things that she's like youknow, a, b, z, a, b a b, c, r
to z, um, just kind of like bedetailed with it, because if I
(09:25):
don't, if you don't effectivelycommunicate, it still can come
off kind of a little confusion alittle bit, because you're
missing the meat of it.
That makes sense.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
It does make sense.
And one of the things that wetalk about in the program right
is that women and mencommunicate differently.
So by the time he has been towork, he has said his few
thousands of words for the day,and now he's come home to this
wife and she still has about50,000 left and she wants to
give them all to you tonight,cause tomorrow I have another
(10:01):
80,000.
You tonight, because tomorrow Ihave another 80,000.
So I'm going to give you allthat I have today.
And then we're like well,answer me.
And you, you can't even processthat many words, right?
You're like okay, I don't knowwhat to say, right, I know that
it's really funny because if I,when I watch couples, especially
(10:24):
, you know, younger couples,when the, when the women see
each other, like and they'rehaving big conversation, and the
guy's like yeah, like it's alittle flat for me, like what's
are you, you, you guys, good,they're still friends, yeah like
why we we?
talk right.
(10:44):
So I'm hearing you say thatlearning to really communicate
in a way that she can receive itwas a challenge, right, and
it's something that you had tobe actively committed to getting
down pat.
But on the flip side of that,Naomi, too, being patient and
giving him grace, I'm issomething that you had to learn
(11:04):
too.
Tell us a little bit about that.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Yeah, no, no, definitely.
That's one thing he reminds meof, because I would say, wait a
minute, like I would explainmyself, or I thought I would
explain myself but he's like but.
And then I'm realizing whereyou're starting at one end of
the staircase and I'm over here,like I'm at the top and he's at
the bottom.
So we think we're understandingwhat each other's saying, but
(11:27):
we gotta really say, okay, wait,let's take a second, do you get
what I'm saying?
He's like wait, no, I'm likeall right.
So then tell me what you thinkI'm saying.
So for me it's I'm getting.
I guess I'm used to beinggotten so quick, like from my
family, because they know mygrooves.
But it's different it's not justnew york it's not just new york
(11:48):
, it's um.
Now you're doing life with melike I was used to like in my
house.
I was the one that like madedecisions and like did things.
So now it's like I got someoneas a co-equal doing things with
me and so really being patient.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
We have this thing not because you're all 11, baby.
We have this thing on thestatue.
It says together we can make it.
We learned that you know,nothing works if one person is
one person is not.
We pray together, we eattogether, we do things together.
And you find out that, you know, when you do things together
(12:24):
God moves the quickest becauseit's you, you know, and so and
so, um, when, when, when, when,it was, uh, when we two making
things go right, three, uh, it,uh, it kicked out of sight.
You know saying so.
And then we learn also not togo to bed angry.
We learn also that not to talkabout money before bed and not
(12:47):
to talk about money beforechurch, not to talk about money.
Speaker 3 (12:52):
Yeah, it was before church and at nighttime because
it's just not good timings, whenit's daylight outside.
We'll talk about it.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
That's wisdom.
That's wisdom, right.
So you know, one of the thingsthat my husband and I do is we
do have a cutoff time for heavytopics, right, and then we also
have a weekly check-in.
So we check in, we have a timeto check in.
So if it's not something thatneeds to be decided before the
weekly check then it's more likeyou know, try to cut it off by
(13:30):
like five or six o'clock so wehave time to come down, your
emotions have time to to comeback into order and all that
kind of stuff.
You can be sure you're clear.
And also, before you get tootired, right, cause you're tired
, you start a science stall.
You know where you might, whereyou might, where you might be
able to say it one way, you knowwhen you're rested and you're
fresh, and then you know you gettired and you just want to be
(13:50):
fresh, right.
So, um, yeah, I learned thatone the hard way, because when
we were first married man, Igave this man I mean fever.
I remember.
I don't even remember what theargument was about, but this is
no lie.
We had an argument that was sofierce it raised my blood
(14:12):
pressure to like 200 and changeover a hundred and change Like.
Speaker 3 (14:16):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
I don't ever remember being that boisterous and angry
with somebody.
And my husband was like laydown on your left side, get in
the bed.
He goes, I'm not going to leaveor anything, because if your
blood pressure doesn't come downin an hour you've got to go to
the hospital.
I mean it was that bad.
And I was like he's like stop,and our bedroom has a balcony,
(14:40):
so he's out on the deck.
He went out on the deck, soit's right.
It was on my side of the doors,on my side of the bed, so he
was just sitting there listeningto music, trying to calm
himself down and I am seething.
So now I'm seething and I'mlike God, and God says you about
to kill yourself, trying to beright.
And the Holy Spirit saidsomething to me that was so
(15:00):
powerful that we haven't hadLord, god, protect this
testimony an argument like thatsince.
So we don't argue, we justdon't argue.
We have mechanisms in placethat resolve any, you know,
misunderstandings ordifficulties that we have.
So but that first year, woohallelujah.
And in the bed I'm trying towait for this blood pressure to
come down.
Instead of praying for myhealth, I'm praying God, I'm
(15:23):
right and he's wrong and I don'teven remember what the topic
was about, and when I asked himhe was like I don't remember
either, but it was fierce.
I just remember how it playedout.
Holy Spirit said there's ascripture that says it is better
to dwell on the corner of arooftop than to live in a wide
house with a brawling woman.
He said your husband is outthere on the deck because he
(15:46):
refuses to leave, because heknows that you might need his
help, but you have sent him tothe corner of the rooftop with
your behavior.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Snatched my proverbial pearls.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
Well, let me tell you something.
You don't have to tell me that,but one time, but one time, and
I called my spiritual mom, andyou know I was telling her what
was going on and she's like doyou want to be married?
And I was like, of course, shesaid well then, you're going to
have to dial it back and you'regoing to have to give up your
right to be right.
And this is something the HolySpirit had told me Give up your
right to be right.
You don't need to be right.
(16:20):
That's so funny.
Oh, there it is.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
That's so funny because I was about to say that
a wife said to us when we wasarguing there's times of petty
things.
You know and I'm actually youknow marriage, sometimes you
argue about things, you know, hesaid, he said, he said simple
sentence, he said you want to beright or married, that's it.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
That's it, that's it.
He said you, can you give upyour right to be right?
And then she told me.
She said the two of you havevery strong personalities.
You're both.
You've had decades ofmanagement experience, you've
been in charge of yourhouseholds, you've been single a
long time.
She said if you don't make theconscious decision that being
married and being in goodfellowship with your husband is
(17:04):
more important than you beingright, she says y'all are not
going to make it this whole year.
You're not going to make it ayear.
You're not going to make it ayear.
And I had to take that to theLord because people I don't know
and I think I've said it onthis show I was a paralegal for
12 years.
I know how to argue, baby.
Oh, I know how to argue.
Bull, we can go there if youwant, okay you feeling froggy
(17:29):
leave.
I got something for you rightand my husband has a very strong
personality, so he wasn'tbacking down.
I'm not backing down, I gotskills.
So I had to make that decisionand I have to tell you, even
when I'm right and I don't wantto give up my position no pun
intended, since this is the nameof the podcast but and I don't
(17:50):
want to, you know, give up myright.
I take it to God.
Father, you know what.
You have your way.
If he needs to be corrected,you correct him.
I need to go on and do what Igot to do.
I keep my side of the streetclean.
That's on you and I can tellyou that is a much better place
to be.
So, for all y'all listening outthere, we hope that y'all take
something away from that.
Don't send your husband out tothe rooftop.
Speaker 3 (18:13):
No, no, no, Don't do that, that that was me.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
I own my stuff.
I own my stuff becausehopefully that's a learning
point for somebody, because thatit's just stuck on.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Silly, I gotta tell you yeah, but I was right wow,
it took me a while to learn inthe beginning too, because I
would pick different times ofthe night to pick up certain
topics and he's like it's late,let's go to sleep.
And I'm like, no, but I want totalk about this now and it it
would exhaust me and then itwould just.
And then he you know he's he'smore graced with that than me,
(18:45):
because he's like I'm not goingto talk about this right now.
He's like I think that weshould just both lie down and
say goodbye tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
I used to stay quiet.
Speaker 3 (18:51):
I had to learn, like the first few months, and I was
just like.
It wasn't until more a couplemonths and we the the grooving
kind of started.
Like you know it, it was easierto do certain things together
yeah but it was just my, myLatin side, my independent side.
(19:12):
God had to humble me, you know.
Just remind me, girl, you wantto be right or you want to be
married.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
You get to make that choice, right.
Yeah, the bad part for me wasthat wasn't the first time Holy
Spirit said that to me.
That wasn't the first time hesaid that to me when we were
engaged, and what would happenwhen we first got married and we
would get into these Like weonly argued when we were
protecting our own territory,when it wasn't about the
(19:39):
relationship but it was moreabout us as individuals and we
were trying to keep that, ratherthan marriage, more important.
And we were on the Belt Parkwayand it was 1130 at night on a
weeknight Now, you know, usuallyit's empty, right, we were at a
stalemate and we had beenbickering back and forth for a
(20:01):
while and the traffic stoppedand we sat in that traffic for
like an hour and a half, maybetwo hours, and said nothing, and
I heard the holy.
I heard the holy spirit about10 minutes in when he said, yeah
, you right, but you want to bemarried, okay, well, you won't
have to shut that down then.
Huh and um, I just sat there anhour and a half, almost two
(20:28):
hours, and when I literally said, I said I said his name, I said
james, and I said what I saidabout, and I know what this
argument was about and I saidwhat I said and you know, made
it about the relationship andnot me being right.
The traffic opened like that.
When I tell you it was, it waslike Holy Spirit said you could
(20:53):
have been home.
You could have been homebecause literally we were
sitting there at a stall outlike just sitting there waiting.
People were standing outside oftheir cars, the traffic was not
moving at all.
As soon as I gave Holy SpiritHis way which at the time I was
seeing it as giving James Hisway, right Soon, as Holy Spirit
(21:16):
was in control, traffic openedright up.
And when I tell you, we gothome in no time and I said look,
what else would happen?
And this would happen to us allthe time If we had an argument
in the car, we would get stuckin traffic because we used to
travel back home from work everyday together before COVID, so
(21:37):
we would always get stuck intraffic.
So if the traffic got heavy, hewould turn to me and go you
holding anything in that youwant, hey, so we can get this
traffic moving and then we wouldcrack up.
So that's like our standing joke.
I don't know about you, but Ilove those insiders, when you
have those little inside jokeswith each other and so keywords
Sign inside jokes with eachother, and so keywords oh, oh,
(22:02):
oh, oh, give us the tea.
Oh, she's blushing.
Oh, my headphones, y'allheadphones oh, oh, yeah we you
don't have to tell us.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
We saw a pickup line in the movie.
We saw a pickup line and well,we saw a pickup line in a movie.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
We saw a pickup line.
We saw like a line in a movie.
I wouldn't say it.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
We saw a pickup line and the guy's thinking I got you
.
So every time we like help eachother with something we'll be
like I got you.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
And then there was another one From a Marvel, thor.
He said to Star-Lord.
And then Star-Lord, they waslike die and see who's going to
be the captain of the ship.
And then he was stating hisside, star-lord was stating his
side to Thor.
He was like you know I'm acaptain, right, you know I'm a
(22:59):
captain right of this ship door.
He was like he said you knowI'm a captain, you know I'm a
captain right of this ship,right.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
He's like, Does she, of course?
Speaker 2 (23:05):
you, yeah, of course.
So he kept saying of course,and so like we kind of like you
know, like adopted that in ourfamily.
And then, like when she saidcertain things, I said of course
.
Speaker 3 (23:16):
Of course, so you're just having a whole lot of fun
over there what do I say?
I'll say, can you straightenout my rug?
And he's like it's my rug too.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
Yeah, yeah, do it to like get on his nerve.
Speaker 3 (23:27):
But it's funny, I'm like you know.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
like you know, putting my car is my car too,
just like trying to keep it,like y'all having in this Y'all
are having a lot of fun overthere.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
So it sounds like it's been eight months of
adjustments, eight months of fun, eight months of new stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yeah, we went on a trip.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
We continued the adventure, but you're on the
ground, right, we're staying.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, a lot of clouds.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Okay we got that part , so we did a little bit of
traveling too.
Wait a minute now, y'all,because I was about to ask y'all
something else, but y'all been.
I know that you went to, um,some family functions abroad and
stuff like that yeah how do youtravel?
Was that different, travelingas a couple than it was
traveling as singles?
Speaker 2 (24:10):
oh yeah, oh yeah.
Yeah, it was thank god.
Yeah, because thank god youhave, I'm just gonna be real,
I'm just gonna be really real.
You have to be married going tothose countries, because it's a
lot of temptations there and Ithank God we're saved and I
thank God that we, you know thatwe won and you know just a lot
(24:31):
of crazy stuff.
It's a party country and they'dbe like we try to go to sleep,
like you know we go to sleep acertain time.
They'd be partying until 4o'clock in the morning, 5
o'clock.
Speaker 3 (24:44):
We went to Colombia.
Cartagena, colombia, we wereright behind us.
It was like a party club.
Until 4 in the morning you werehearing the basses moving.
It felt like the Spanishversion of New York.
I'm like oh another country whodoesn't sleep.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
It was right next to us too.
Our Airbnb is like the oceansright there.
It's like a beach club rightthere.
I usually wake up at 3 o'clockin the morning and pray and
stuff.
Now I hear it.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
I'm being tested, lord.
Yeah.
Well, even in that y'all youknow you're building those
memories that you know your 50thand your 60th anniversary
you're going to be talking aboutwith your family and
reminiscing about.
So even in that there's goodstuff, right, I'm loving it.
(25:42):
You know one of the things thatwhen I know, naomi, when you
were in the program, we alwaystalk about stuff like would you
tell your husband that you hadparticipated in this program?
And obviously you did right.
And I wanted to know fromMaurice what are your thoughts
now that you've, now that you'remarried?
You know we went through thecourting and the engagement and
you're married now, what areyour thoughts about a wife who
(26:04):
participated in the program, theprogram, this program, yeah and
my.
So you know we had at that timeit was called Wife Life Academy
and now it's called Positionfor Love.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
It's a similar program to what Naomi and her
friends experienced.
So what are your thoughts aboutthat?
Just curious from a man'sperspective um.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
So the program like remember I would tell you that
we would spend like weeklymeetings with her.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
She would oh oh, yeah , yeah, so so it's wait.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Preparation for marriage gotcha.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
It very beneficial.
It's very beneficial to womenout there, because there's a
saying that proper preparationprevents poor performances.
That's just giving you to copythe glory.
(27:00):
So you have to prepare to walkinto your future, amen.
So so god has sent you to help,you know, you know, prepare the
way you know, and and get hermindset right and just like and.
And it wasn't.
If it wasn't for you, god,you've, you've been used by God,
all God be to glory, then sheprobably wouldn't have, you know
(27:22):
, been sitting here right now.
I probably still would havefound her somewhere, you know,
because we meant to be together.
Yeah, yeah, but it's just, it'sgood to she got a head start to
knowing that what she's going towalk into which is very
beneficial for women and malesIf they have a male person out
there that does or you do malestoo it's just more like you know
(27:43):
it's, it's, it's it's.
It's a beautiful thing becauseit's you know, it's just it
makes things connect better.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
Yeah, and it opens you up, you know, if you are
always closed off.
That's that was my problem foryears, like I was just always I
got it, I got it, I'm fine.
For years my face would scaremen off because I was just like
I don't need nobody.
I was approached once by a guywho was like oh, can I have your
number?
I was like I don't need no man,I'm not looking for a man.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
This was in my 20s and this, and this is why we
don't have them right yes, ifyou have no need for him I think
, I think I said what happened.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
If I was that guy, what do you mean?
I have not taken her program,yet I'll be like god, just give
me business, you remember wedidn't talk about that in the
program.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
God, yes, my wife, yeah and I tell you I was single
um that the year before I metmy husband like a few months
before I met my husband, I think, I had four or five men tell me
the same thing.
I was like you were lying,wonder, god did not tell you
that.
And, and I stopped saying that,I said I can't tell you what
god did or did not say to you.
I can tell you I didn't get thememo.
(28:57):
So since you, you think youheard God tell him to send me a
memo.
Let's cut this out, cause you,you, you can tell a lie and be
responsible for it.
So stop it.
But you know this man, he, he,when he said it, well, no, I
called him a Pentecostal pimp,cause he did say that yeah,
(29:22):
you're supposed to be my wife,I'm going to marry you.
That's what he said.
Speaker 3 (29:24):
He said I'm going to marry you and I was like this
Pentecostal pimp.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
Cause this was the first week we met.
So I was like lie and wonder.
No, he said no, I'm going toprove it to you.
I'm going to prove it to youCause I already know, I heard.
I was like well, I didn't hearnothing.
So there, rolled my eyes andsucked my teeth.
Here we are right, eight yearslater.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
So to God.
Be all the glory for that.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
That went fast.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
It went really really really fast, I have to tell you
so enjoy every minute of itbecause you're right, you don't
get your time back, right?
Speaker 1 (29:51):
So enjoy every single minute and I love what you said
, that you know we have to beprepared for what we're asking
for, and I often say have youprayed before instead of wind?
Because I wind for a long time,so my prayer was really winding
right.
Have you prayed as much asyou've talked about it?
(30:13):
Have you prayed as much as youwind about it?
And also, are you reallypreparing for what you're asking
for?
Because if he should bless youwith what you've asked for and
you've spent your whole timewhining and crying and asking
him when it's coming rather thanpreparing when it gets here you
don't know what to do with it.
So a lot of times to your point, maurice a lot of times I think
sisters will um meet a good manright and then not know how to
(30:37):
handle him yeah what do you evendo with one?
because one of the things I seein the body all the time, in the
body of christ, we're taught toavoid men, women are taught to
avoid men, and then we wonderwhy they go and marry the
unsaved sister, or the sisterbarely she barely saved, I mean
barely making it, and likesliding into home base trying to
(30:59):
make it in she barely saved.
She ain't got but onehallelujah on her tongue.
But here's the thing she knowshow to handle handle him she
knows how to speak to a man.
Right, I had to relearn myhusband.
He told me.
He said you're too sharp and Iwas like so now I'm sharp and
(31:19):
I'm rolling my eyes.
So what we're?
Going to do and it's like andagain, here comes holy ghost
going.
What are we doing?
This is the one you prayed for,like, oh, it's always on me,
it's always on me.
He goes.
Yeah, because you're the onlyone you have control over that
conviction comes quick if youallow it, though, but only if
(31:44):
you allow it.
See, that's, that's the thing.
The conviction comes quickly ifyou allow it and if you heed to
it, and there's been times Ididn't, there's been times I
didn't.
I'm just at this point.
It's a lot easier not to fightthe holy ghost.
I mean, it just is it.
You know I'm just saying but,but I I could.
I pretty much gave him a goodrun for his money and you know
the word says that, um, I willnot strive with the spirit of
(32:07):
man forever.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
I'm not trying to make him mad.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
I want to welcome him into my marriage, so be that
third strand in our cord.
I don't want to grieve him.
People don't realize that theHoly Spirit has emotion, so I
don't want to grieve him.
I want him to be part of ourjoy.
My husband enjoys coming homeand I want that to always be his
testimony.
Because you're the best part ofmy day, love that, and I want
(32:38):
that to always be, because I wasa trip without luggage.
Wow, that's, that's listen.
That's real talk.
That is real talk.
That is real talk.
But, thankfully, one of thethings I say too, is that the
more we teach, the more we learn.
So, being in the position.
That father has allowed me toteach some incredible women and
(33:02):
to mentor some incredible womento the altar and the journey to
the altar it's been a blessing,because it's also blessed you
know me and my marriage becauseit keeps me on my toes.
So if, if, if I had, if I hadadvice for single women, I would
say get a mentor.
Get a mentor real quick,because it's going to cut your
(33:23):
learning curve and take out alot of the drama that that you
would have had to try to figureout by yourself, a lot of the
drama that you would have had totry to figure out by yourself.
But if you had something toshare, naomi, with the single
sisters who want to be marriedthey're tired of embracing their
singleness and they're ready toget married what would your
advice be for them?
Speaker 3 (33:42):
You need the outside perspective because what happens
is growing up.
You're really shaped by family,by culture.
So you grew up in the bubble,you know, and there's no one to
call you outside the bubble, youthink you're fine and you know
there are people that will meettheir the love of their life
(34:03):
across the street.
They were raised up togetherbut that's not always the case.
Right For me and another sisterat that time, we just there was
nobody in our circle, nobodythat we, me and another sister.
At that time we just there wasnobody in our circle, nobody
that we were attracted to in ourhome time, in our, in our.
So I was like listen.
I said either what's going onhere?
Do I have to move?
Do I have to?
You got to get out of the samecircle and get a different
(34:28):
perspective, because you'redoing the same thing over and
over and nothing's happening.
And I knew it was a desire forme to get married because God
had put that desire right.
I had never really dated mywhole life, but at 35, the light
bulb went off and I said wait aminute.
I said I want a companion, Iwant a companion.
So, speaking to another sister,besides your program, because
(34:52):
we had, I had to learn to workon some things for myself.
Stop the, you can do everythingon your own mentality.
I'm fine, I got it.
Give man a room to be a man.
That's number one.
Number two just try somethingdifferent.
I had always signed on toonline profiles, but then I
(35:13):
wouldn't like pursue anything.
I remember this, oh, and I wentback and back and I'm like
remember it was a tug of war fora long time.
So I don't know I can, becausethere could be cycles online.
But there could be cycles righthere in the street.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
I know some of them.
I'm related to some of themstreet.
Speaker 3 (35:34):
I know some of them, I'm related to some of them,
yeah, so it wasn't until anothersister got um Facebook dating
and she couldn't you knowcreated a profile and I was like
, oh, good for you, girl, goodfor you, but I wouldn't take my
own advice.
And it got to a point I waslike what?
What happens that again I hadto try something different?
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
I don't know.
And then I think I don't know.
He's too good to be true.
I remember, do you rememberthis?
He's too good to be true, Idon't know.
All right, let's see what he'stalking about.
How's it about?
(36:21):
How's what he says like, oh,this is what happened.
Oh, yeah, we're gonna let youknow.
All the team listen.
Yeah, I think not.
Right, you are the man and um,I just remember that.
Wow, oh my gosh, could thisreally be real, right?
Do you remember that?
I remember these conversationsand just checking in and I think
that is so powerful.
And it's a lot of times we thinkthat accountability is just
about people saying, oh no,don't take that person and this
is wrong and that's wrong.
But sometimes there's greenflags that we don't necessarily
(36:43):
recognize and we can miss ablessing because of our own
stuff.
And, like you said, if we don'thave a different perspective,
right, we'll just use the thingsthat we've seen in our lives
and that's not always the bestway to pursue our relationships,
right?
So here was this good man whowas into you from the beginning,
(37:03):
and if y'all haven't listenedto their interview, their first
interview was hysterical and youhave got to go back and hear
more about her Wonder Woman andhis feet and her eyebrows.
Y'all need to go back and listento that interview and, again,
the link is going to be in theshow notes.
But God knew, god knew right,and so you did a few things
(37:28):
right, just taking a chance.
And I think that one of thethings that we do is we don't
want to take that leap right,like you talked about more
recently beginning.
That's a leap of faith that wasnew to her right, but you got
to take that leap of faith.
But here is the thing what Isee a lot of us do and I'd love
to hear from you on this is whenwe're ready to take those leaps
(37:51):
, we take them alone.
So we take them ill-advised orunadvised.
We don't have a guide on theside saying oh baby, the bridge
is out, don't leap right yet.
Right, let the drawbridge comeback down.
Or somebody to say, hey, is thisa red flag?
Right?
Because I remember some of thethings in the group and we would
be like, oh my gosh, and I havea whole flag set, maurice, I
(38:13):
literally have flags.
They have red flag, white flag,black flag, oh yeah, oh yeah,
don't let me raise the blackflag.
This is bad.
Raise the black flag.
We are praying, homeboy, got togo right.
But is this good?
Is this right?
How do I, how do I answer thesethings or how do I behave or
(38:34):
respond?
And that's, I think, that's soimportant, understanding that
it's not just accountability, isnot just about well, this
person may not, you know, bemaybe leading you astray or may
not be honest with you.
It's also about, hey, this is,this could be something.
It's also about, hey, thiscould be something, this could
be something.
And I have a saying that we sayyes until it's no right,
(38:55):
because you have to let it playout.
You have to hear what a man hasto say, because in the
beginning, a man tells you whohe is and what he came for.
If you listen, but we don'tlisten because we're too busy
telling them what we want, whatwe ain't going to do, and I'm
going to tell you and you thatit's true.
(39:16):
And end up missing out on agood thing, end up missing out
on being his good thing.
Oh shucks, he's like yes.
I want the thing, hallelujah.
Speaker 3 (39:25):
Exactly, I didn't know how to talk to a guy.
I would get nervous if I talkedto a guy in church more than
five minutes.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
She was really nervous, though.
On her first date, though, umshe kept falling, you didn't
tell me that I think.
I think I don't know if I saidit or thought it so you really
fall.
You fall in love with me and Iwas there to catch her.
Speaker 1 (39:50):
I was there too, you wanted to see if you could
handle it yeah, I don't know ifthat was a test to this day.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
It's really mystery, but it was really mystery some
of the secrets we'll keep.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I love it.
So I know that you've learned alot.
You've shared a lot.
I know that you, you've learneda lot.
You, you know you've shared alot.
I'm so grateful that you,you've come back to give us some
updates.
I know, Naomi, that we spent alot of time in prep and and um,
you've shared that.
You felt ready.
Yeah, what is one thing youboth wish that you had known
(40:31):
before marriage?
One thing that's a good one,right?
Speaker 3 (40:43):
I can't wait, um, wait, hold.
On the silence.
Um, the silence game is not aseffective as you think, because
sometimes I would, just becausehe was my first relationship.
So sometimes I'm like, andsometimes we would, just if
(41:06):
something rubbed us the wrongway, we would just the phone
would go silent, but it wasnever more than like a day.
But we were, we were reallystubborn in the beginning, both
of us.
We were more like like the.
We've seen the bending and themolding, you know.
So I think one thing um, I wishwe were practicing those things
(41:28):
a little more, like morepatience and things like that
before you get married, becausesometimes you can get so excited
and we did the pre-marriagecounseling and all that but
sometimes working on thatcommunication is so key, like
having those clear things orient, you know, because sometimes
you can step into marriage withtwo different ideas and then I
(41:52):
mean I think it just everyonehas to work at it.
But taking more time to work onthe communication part and on
more of what, hey, what do youenvision this to be or that to
be?
Because you can get so excitedabout things.
More communication comes later.
I said a lot in a nutshell butI would say, uh, spending more
time communicating on what youknow what.
(42:15):
How do you see marriage beforeyou actually?
Speaker 1 (42:18):
get married.
So more time, um, likeenvisioning your time together
and your marriage and and whathave you?
Yeah, yeah, I think that and Iknow, I know you were prepared.
I know how much time we spenttalking about that and not
having Cinderella fantasies, andI mean, we worked together for
(42:42):
a while and then, even after theprogram was over, we were in
contact, still in contact, right, yeah.
We were in contact still incontact, right, yeah, but I
think there are some things thatyou won't know until you get
married, right?
There are some things whenyou're it's very different when
you're living with someone andsleeping next to someone every
night.
It's a very different thingwhen you have to make your
(43:03):
decisions together.
So I mean, there's a certainamount of prep and then I think
there's a certain amount ofpractical that it just has to.
You know, you got to walk itout, you got to walk it out.
Speaker 3 (43:14):
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, really true.
Speaker 1 (43:17):
So, talking about vision as we wrap up, what are
some future plans?
What do you all see on thehorizon for the next?
Okay, so we're eight months in.
So for the next 16 monthsmonths because that'll be at the
two-year mark so for the nextyear and a half a little bit
less than a year and a half whatare some of your visions or
goals?
(43:37):
So, um let me get this one,since she got them.
Speaker 2 (43:42):
Um, I well, we want to still go.
You know, I know the last crazystuff.
We're going from paris.
We we to still.
I still want to take her toParis some of these days Because
I know she had like a, you know, when I first met her she had
like a Paris Alpha Tower behindher and stuff and that's quite
(44:06):
after that, right.
So I want to like you know.
So I was like kind of like hervision board a little bit and
she wouldn't like always want togo.
She, you know, I know that shewouldn't go there because like
multiple advertisers that shehad.
So I want to take it to Paris,but I also want to, you know,
(44:27):
get my CDL license.
Okay, you know, I know she'sgoing to get her, like she want
to get her.
What is it?
Speaker 3 (44:34):
I was looking into notary Notary, so those are just
like what are you thinking ofdoing?
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Obviously kids.
So just kind of like, you know,move forward more financially
so she can have a choice to workor not.
But the job I'm having, the jobI'm having is actually going to
(44:58):
be used for kingdom business.
So the CDL license, not only Ijust want to be a truck driver,
but I want to Okay, it lookslike we got a little a little
lag on your internet there ablueprint.
Speaker 1 (45:17):
I'm gonna protect this conversation all right, we
kind of lost you a little bitthere, but it sounds like you're
looking towards building afinancial future and serving the
kingdom with your work.
I absolutely love it.
Thank you for sharing that withus.
(45:37):
I love it and you know, it'sreally what's really cool about
you remembering what's on hervision board and your desire to
bring it to pass.
That's what I'm talking about,and we did catch you when you
said you know, so she can havethe choice if she wants to work
or not.
Sis was like hallelujah.
Speaker 3 (45:58):
Hallelujah, that's right.
Glory, glory.
Speaker 1 (46:01):
So it sounds like the vision is matching.
I'm excited for the two of you.
So you know we're going to haveto catch up again in the future
and see how things are comingalong.
But so you know we're going tohave to catch up again in the
(46:23):
future and see how things arecoming along.
But in the meantime, thank youall for sharing with us, giving
us the updates, and for sharingwith the world.
You know your experiences asnewlyweds.
It is so impactful becausepeople don't talk about the
physical stuff, but there's awhole lot of other things that
goes into getting married andmaking it work and serving God
together.
So thank you so much forsharing it with us.
Speaker 2 (46:39):
Amen.
Nothing but love, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:44):
Love having you and I'm so grateful that you're
still on the ground.
Amen that you're still on theground.
That you're still on the ground, no more planes.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
On the time we're going again, we'll be traveling
in planes.
Speaker 1 (46:56):
So from now on, you'll stay inside the plane.
Speaker 2 (46:58):
Yeah, inside the plane, maybe harder.
Speaker 1 (47:00):
Naomi, if I were you, I'd be checking, because you
know we're one and one.
So one trip you were inside theplane, one trip you were outside
of the plane.
I don't know if it'salternating, but if I were you I
would ask some questions.
That's all.
Thank you all so much.
I will leave the links to theiroriginal interviews.
I am telling you they areabsolutely positively hysterical
(47:23):
.
Go back and listen to the otherinterviews, because you need to
know more about Wonder Womaneyebrows.
You need to know more aboutWonder Woman eyebrows.
You need to know more aboutWonder Woman eyebrows yes, they
do.
All right, until next time.
My name is Kimberly Knight andthis is the Position Podcast.
See you soon, take care.
Bye, darlings.
I love God.
All right, all right, welcometo the position podcast.
I am Kimberly Knight and I amhere to catch up with the
newlyweds, naomi and Maurice.
Oh shucks, now how y'all doing.
We're doing great.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
We're doing awesome Woo.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Wow, I'll take the woo woo.
Eight months now, yeah, eightmonths, yeah.
So you gotta catch us up.
Tell us how this first eightmonths has been.
It hasn't even been a year, soy'all, it's still some brand
spanking new.
How has this first eight monthsbeen?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
ladies first yeah it has been, I would say, an
adjustment, because we I mean wedid it old school from the
beginning, so you know I wasstill living with my parents.
He asked for my hand, so movingout.
Yes, yes, girl so moving outand now having your own place,
your own space, it's like Idon't know, we're king and queen
(01:08):
of the castle and it's justlike it's awesome, we're never
going back.
I hope not, no no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
We can listen, we can be free in our house without
restrictions and I thank God forthat.
Hey glory.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Hey glory.
So this is where I say andthose who listen to me regularly
know that sometimes I say thisToday may be a headphone day.
So, just in case you havechildren you don't want to give
a new education to, this may bea headphone day Cause you know,
(01:53):
all right, if you know, you know, and if you don't, well,
headphones anyway, all righty'all.
So y'all enjoying your, yourmarried freedom and each other,
and you're still smiling andjoking.
We had a really good timebefore we started taping.
So I know y'all are stillhaving a good time and I still
(02:14):
say you had my baby jumping outof a plane and I'm still not OK
with that.
If y'all haven't heard thematter of fact, not even the
first interview, it ended upbeing two interviews because it
was just so outrageous that wehad to do two interviews when
they got engaged.
So go back and listen to those.
I will leave a link in the shownotes.
But he had this baby jumpingout of a plane.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
When they got engaged .
Speaker 2 (02:37):
That's right.
Listen, sometimes you got totake a leap of faith.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Boy bye.
She was all for it too.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
She's like hey, in the future.
You know what I'm saying.
And because she took a leap offaith, this is what we the
reward she has, the fruit, thefruit of the Of her labor, the
labor.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Yeah, there you go, the fruit of her labor.
Oh my gosh.
Well, I am hoping that well.
First of all, I'm glad youlanded without incident, because
that would have been something.
Speaker 3 (03:09):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Because, maurice, we would have come for you.
There's a whole bunch ofaunties going mm-hmm, Made our
baby jump out of a plane, girl.
This that goes back to you.
Remember when we were kids andyour mom would say if everybody
was jumping off the bridge,would you jump?
Speaker 3 (03:32):
well, apparently you would I've been only after the
right man not any of theshenanigans.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Like I said I wanted you know someone really like, uh
, um, a extremeness like myselfand adventurous and spontaneous,
and I didn't want no one boringand so she passed the ultimate
test and so because of that, youknow I was the, you know she
met my wife and so it's abeautiful thing because I
(04:02):
skateboard and you know it's fun.
Oh, I didn't know youskateboard.
Yeah, yeah, I actually taughther a little bit.
She rolled a little bit on theskateboard, a little.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
He's the expert.
We'll leave him the expert.
Yeah, she was actually myfilmer.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Yeah, see, that's my role too.
When y'all are jumping out ofstuff, I'm on the ground, I
ground.
I'm on the ground making surethe EMTs know where we are and
that there's video and all thatkind of stuff, I'm not jumping
out enough.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Oh no, I'm one and done.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
Oh, that was it.
That was it for you.
Speaker 3 (04:33):
No, no, no, the roller coasters.
No, that was it.
I'm one and done.
What did she say?
Speaker 2 (04:39):
She wasn't going to do bungee jumping.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
She wasn't going to do bungee jumping.
She wasn't going to do bungeejumping.
Oh, we're not bungee jumping.
We want y'all to get to thatfirst anniversary.
Y'all started off really,really exciting and that was
really different, right?
So what other surprises hasmarriage brought?
Because I know for me there waslike that first year was like,
oh, we didn't think about that.
Or oh, wow, I didn't know.
You know, we, we need to checkin on it with each other about
that.
So what kind of surprises cameup for y'all?
Speaker 3 (05:13):
well, um, he has.
So it's definitely been anadventure with him from the
beginning, I think, learning todo adult stuff, because we did a
lot of the fun stuff, datingsitting down and like wait a
minute, knowing when to say yesand no, because now you're a
(05:33):
unit, right.
So you got both sides OK, youwant to go to this, want to go
to this.
You got friends and everyone'sexcited but we're like, ok, but
we also have to realize what'srealistic for us what do we say
yes?
to what do we say no?
Not just to not just exhaustourselves, but also budget-wise,
yeah, realistic wise.
Because I'd be the type in thebeginning I was like, yeah, yeah
(05:56):
, let's do that.
Yeah, yeah, well, let's try tobook um events with both parties
.
We'll do like half a day overthere.
He goes don't double book us.
He goes that's too much for us.
And I'm like, oh yeah, wait,it's like my mind gets excited.
But then he helps me, likeground me, like baby, you're
gonna be tired.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
So let's just do some balance yeah yeah, this is all
about you know um wisdom.
You know not just the head andthe heart and just kind of like
wisdom and the finances, wisdomhave a wisdom and and and just
and everything like timemanagement you know, because you
(06:35):
get money back, you can't gettime back and um.
And so I learned for myself thatthat you know, um, I can't,
just because when I was singleand everything and I was, you
know, even engaged because weweren't living together,
obviously, when engaged, youknow, I, I can just get in the
car and leave and go to the gymor go to just go to a skate park
(06:56):
, whatever.
But I now, I, I actually haveto tell her where I'm going and
like if, because it was, youknow, even like, even if I do go
, if she don't mind if I go, Ijust gotta just let her know,
hey, I'm going, and like if,because you know, even like,
even if I do go, if she don'tmind if I go, I just gotta just
let her know.
Hey, babe, I'm going, xyz, I'llcome right back, or because she
won't spend that intimate timewith me or she want to, you know
, do things around theneighborhood, take a walk, or I
(07:17):
can't just just go in my car anddip, you know, yeah, yeah, I
learned that myself.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Uh, oh, you know yeah , so I learned that myself.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Uh-oh, you know, yeah , so I had to swerve that right
back around, bring that car backinto the garage, right?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
So, yeah, that is a big adjustment, because now
having to say to that otherperson and take that other
person into consideration, it'snot about permission, it's more
about consideration.
Yeah Right, and then how do wespend our time?
I think you know it's funnybecause with most newlyweds I'm
hearing the same thing the, theneed to figure out how we're
going to spend our time, whatwe're going to do, what we're
not going to do, and how do youspend time with family and
friends?
Cause you know you still, youwant to be part of your
community, but you're alsobuilding your own home, right.
(08:00):
So there's that like thatbalance.
But I'm hearing y'all have beenalso weathering.
Oh.
The other thing I really wantedto say, too, is I'm glad I
always share this and I'm gladthat you're being wise with your
money, because money troublesbreak up more couples than
infidelity, oh yeah.
So being wise with your moneyis so key, so okay.
(08:25):
So I'm glad to hear that anychallenges that you've had that
kind of were like oh, what youwant to answer this one.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
I don't know if there's a job, I guess okay.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Well, so with her, um , I know that she graduated with
a master's degree and shegraduated with, you know, my
master's degree and she wasreally good in, like her english
and uh and a lot of subject,and we're some good certain
things too.
So with me I learned that youknow, if when I communicate I
(09:03):
got effective communicating, notjust community, effectively
communicate, like, actually,like have like the whole, like
how can I simplify everything?
yeah, simplify everything downand just kind of like address
those things that she's like youknow, a, b, z, a, b a b, c, r
to z, um, just kind of like bedetailed with it, because if I
(09:25):
don't, if you don't effectivelycommunicate, it still can come
off kind of a little confusion alittle bit, because you're
missing the meat of it.
That makes sense.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
It does make sense.
And one of the things that wetalk about in the program right
is that women and mencommunicate differently.
So by the time he has been towork, he has said his few
thousands of words for the day,and now he's come home to this
wife and she still has about50,000 left and she wants to
give them all to you tonight,cause tomorrow I have another
(10:01):
80,000.
You tonight, because tomorrow Ihave another 80,000.
So I'm going to give you allthat I have today.
And then we're like well,answer me.
And you, you can't even processthat many words, right?
You're like okay, I don't knowwhat to say, right, I know that
it's really funny because if I,when I watch couples, especially
(10:24):
, you know, younger couples,when the, when the women see
each other, like and they'rehaving big conversation, and the
guy's like yeah, like it's alittle flat for me, like what's
are you, you, you guys, good,they're still friends, yeah like
why we we?
talk right.
(10:44):
So I'm hearing you say thatlearning to really communicate
in a way that she can receive itwas a challenge, right, and
it's something that you had tobe actively committed to getting
down pat.
But on the flip side of that,Naomi, too, being patient and
giving him grace, I'm issomething that you had to learn
(11:04):
too.
Tell us a little bit about that.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Yeah, no, no, definitely.
That's one thing he reminds meof, because I would say, wait a
minute, like I would explainmyself, or I thought I would
explain myself but he's like but.
And then I'm realizing whereyou're starting at one end of
the staircase and I'm over here,like I'm at the top and he's at
the bottom.
So we think we're understandingwhat each other's saying, but
(11:27):
we gotta really say, okay, wait,let's take a second, do you get
what I'm saying?
He's like wait, no, I'm likeall right.
So then tell me what you thinkI'm saying.
So for me it's I'm getting.
I guess I'm used to beinggotten so quick, like from my
family, because they know mygrooves.
But it's different it's not justnew york it's not just new york
(11:48):
, it's um.
Now you're doing life with melike I was used to like in my
house.
I was the one that like madedecisions and like did things.
So now it's like I got someoneas a co-equal doing things with
me and so really being patient.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
We have this thing not because you're all 11, baby.
We have this thing on thestatue.
It says together we can make it.
We learned that you know,nothing works if one person is
one person is not.
We pray together, we eattogether, we do things together.
And you find out that, you know, when you do things together
(12:24):
God moves the quickest becauseit's you, you know, and so and
so, um, when, when, when, when,it was, uh, when we two making
things go right, three, uh, it,uh, it kicked out of sight.
You know saying so.
And then we learn also not togo to bed angry.
We learn also that not to talkabout money before bed and not
(12:47):
to talk about money beforechurch, not to talk about money.
Speaker 3 (12:52):
Yeah, it was before church and at nighttime because
it's just not good timings, whenit's daylight outside.
We'll talk about it.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
That's wisdom.
That's wisdom, right.
So you know, one of the thingsthat my husband and I do is we
do have a cutoff time for heavytopics, right, and then we also
have a weekly check-in.
So we check in, we have a timeto check in.
So if it's not something thatneeds to be decided before the
weekly check then it's more likeyou know, try to cut it off by
(13:30):
like five or six o'clock so wehave time to come down, your
emotions have time to to comeback into order and all that
kind of stuff.
You can be sure you're clear.
And also, before you get tootired, right, cause you're tired
, you start a science stall.
You know where you might, whereyou might, where you might be
able to say it one way, you knowwhen you're rested and you're
fresh, and then you know you gettired and you just want to be
(13:50):
fresh, right.
So, um, yeah, I learned thatone the hard way, because when
we were first married man, Igave this man I mean fever.
I remember.
I don't even remember what theargument was about, but this is
no lie.
We had an argument that was sofierce it raised my blood
(14:12):
pressure to like 200 and changeover a hundred and change Like.
Speaker 3 (14:16):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
I don't ever remember being that boisterous and angry
with somebody.
And my husband was like laydown on your left side, get in
the bed.
He goes, I'm not going to leaveor anything, because if your
blood pressure doesn't come downin an hour you've got to go to
the hospital.
I mean it was that bad.
And I was like he's like stop,and our bedroom has a balcony,
(14:40):
so he's out on the deck.
He went out on the deck, soit's right.
It was on my side of the doors,on my side of the bed, so he
was just sitting there listeningto music, trying to calm
himself down and I am seething.
So now I'm seething and I'mlike God, and God says you about
to kill yourself, trying to beright.
And the Holy Spirit saidsomething to me that was so
(15:00):
powerful that we haven't hadLord, god, protect this
testimony an argument like thatsince.
So we don't argue, we justdon't argue.
We have mechanisms in placethat resolve any, you know,
misunderstandings ordifficulties that we have.
So but that first year, woohallelujah.
And in the bed I'm trying towait for this blood pressure to
come down.
Instead of praying for myhealth, I'm praying God, I'm
(15:23):
right and he's wrong and I don'teven remember what the topic
was about, and when I asked himhe was like I don't remember
either, but it was fierce.
I just remember how it playedout.
Holy Spirit said there's ascripture that says it is better
to dwell on the corner of arooftop than to live in a wide
house with a brawling woman.
He said your husband is outthere on the deck because he
(15:46):
refuses to leave, because heknows that you might need his
help, but you have sent him tothe corner of the rooftop with
your behavior.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Snatched my proverbial pearls.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
Well, let me tell you something.
You don't have to tell me that,but one time, but one time, and
I called my spiritual mom, andyou know I was telling her what
was going on and she's like doyou want to be married?
And I was like, of course, shesaid well then, you're going to
have to dial it back and you'regoing to have to give up your
right to be right.
And this is something the HolySpirit had told me Give up your
right to be right.
You don't need to be right.
(16:20):
That's so funny.
Oh, there it is.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
That's so funny because I was about to say that
a wife said to us when we wasarguing there's times of petty
things.
You know and I'm actually youknow marriage, sometimes you
argue about things, you know, hesaid, he said, he said simple
sentence, he said you want to beright or married, that's it.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
That's it, that's it.
He said you, can you give upyour right to be right?
And then she told me.
She said the two of you havevery strong personalities.
You're both.
You've had decades ofmanagement experience, you've
been in charge of yourhouseholds, you've been single a
long time.
She said if you don't make theconscious decision that being
married and being in goodfellowship with your husband is
(17:04):
more important than you beingright, she says y'all are not
going to make it this whole year.
You're not going to make it ayear.
You're not going to make it ayear.
And I had to take that to theLord because people I don't know
and I think I've said it onthis show I was a paralegal for
12 years.
I know how to argue, baby.
Oh, I know how to argue.
Bull, we can go there if youwant, okay you feeling froggy
(17:29):
leave.
I got something for you rightand my husband has a very strong
personality, so he wasn'tbacking down.
I'm not backing down, I gotskills.
So I had to make that decisionand I have to tell you, even
when I'm right and I don't wantto give up my position no pun
intended, since this is the nameof the podcast but and I don't
(17:50):
want to, you know, give up myright.
I take it to God.
Father, you know what.
You have your way.
If he needs to be corrected,you correct him.
I need to go on and do what Igot to do.
I keep my side of the streetclean.
That's on you and I can tellyou that is a much better place
to be.
So, for all y'all listening outthere, we hope that y'all take
something away from that.
Don't send your husband out tothe rooftop.
Speaker 3 (18:13):
No, no, no, Don't do that, that that was me.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
I own my stuff.
I own my stuff becausehopefully that's a learning
point for somebody, because thatit's just stuck on.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Silly, I gotta tell you yeah, but I was right wow,
it took me a while to learn inthe beginning too, because I
would pick different times ofthe night to pick up certain
topics and he's like it's late,let's go to sleep.
And I'm like, no, but I want totalk about this now and it it
would exhaust me and then itwould just.
And then he you know he's he'smore graced with that than me,
(18:45):
because he's like I'm not goingto talk about this right now.
He's like I think that weshould just both lie down and
say goodbye tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
I used to stay quiet.
Speaker 3 (18:51):
I had to learn, like the first few months, and I was
just like.
It wasn't until more a couplemonths and we the the grooving
kind of started.
Like you know it, it was easierto do certain things together
yeah but it was just my, myLatin side, my independent side.
(19:12):
God had to humble me, you know.
Just remind me, girl, you wantto be right or you want to be
married.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
You get to make that choice, right.
Yeah, the bad part for me wasthat wasn't the first time Holy
Spirit said that to me.
That wasn't the first time hesaid that to me when we were
engaged, and what would happenwhen we first got married and we
would get into these Like weonly argued when we were
protecting our own territory,when it wasn't about the
(19:39):
relationship but it was moreabout us as individuals and we
were trying to keep that, ratherthan marriage, more important.
And we were on the Belt Parkwayand it was 1130 at night on a
weeknight Now, you know, usuallyit's empty, right, we were at a
stalemate and we had beenbickering back and forth for a
(20:01):
while and the traffic stoppedand we sat in that traffic for
like an hour and a half, maybetwo hours, and said nothing, and
I heard the holy.
I heard the holy spirit about10 minutes in when he said, yeah
, you right, but you want to bemarried, okay, well, you won't
have to shut that down then.
Huh and um, I just sat there anhour and a half, almost two
(20:28):
hours, and when I literally said, I said I said his name, I said
james, and I said what I saidabout, and I know what this
argument was about and I saidwhat I said and you know, made
it about the relationship andnot me being right.
The traffic opened like that.
When I tell you it was, it waslike Holy Spirit said you could
(20:53):
have been home.
You could have been homebecause literally we were
sitting there at a stall outlike just sitting there waiting.
People were standing outside oftheir cars, the traffic was not
moving at all.
As soon as I gave Holy SpiritHis way which at the time I was
seeing it as giving James Hisway, right Soon, as Holy Spirit
(21:16):
was in control, traffic openedright up.
And when I tell you, we gothome in no time and I said look,
what else would happen?
And this would happen to us allthe time If we had an argument
in the car, we would get stuckin traffic because we used to
travel back home from work everyday together before COVID, so
(21:37):
we would always get stuck intraffic.
So if the traffic got heavy, hewould turn to me and go you
holding anything in that youwant, hey, so we can get this
traffic moving and then we wouldcrack up.
So that's like our standing joke.
I don't know about you, but Ilove those insiders, when you
have those little inside jokeswith each other and so keywords
Sign inside jokes with eachother, and so keywords oh, oh,
(22:02):
oh, oh, give us the tea.
Oh, she's blushing.
Oh, my headphones, y'allheadphones oh, oh, yeah we you
don't have to tell us.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
We saw a pickup line in the movie.
We saw a pickup line and well,we saw a pickup line in a movie.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
We saw a pickup line.
We saw like a line in a movie.
I wouldn't say it.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
We saw a pickup line and the guy's thinking I got you
.
So every time we like help eachother with something we'll be
like I got you.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
And then there was another one From a Marvel, thor.
He said to Star-Lord.
And then Star-Lord, they waslike die and see who's going to
be the captain of the ship.
And then he was stating hisside, star-lord was stating his
side to Thor.
He was like you know I'm acaptain, right, you know I'm a
(22:59):
captain right of this ship door.
He was like he said you knowI'm a captain, you know I'm a
captain right of this ship,right.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
He's like, Does she, of course?
Speaker 2 (23:05):
you, yeah, of course.
So he kept saying of course,and so like we kind of like you
know, like adopted that in ourfamily.
And then, like when she saidcertain things, I said of course
.
Speaker 3 (23:16):
Of course, so you're just having a whole lot of fun
over there what do I say?
I'll say, can you straightenout my rug?
And he's like it's my rug too.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
Yeah, yeah, do it to like get on his nerve.
Speaker 3 (23:27):
But it's funny, I'm like you know.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
like you know, putting my car is my car too,
just like trying to keep it,like y'all having in this Y'all
are having a lot of fun overthere.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
So it sounds like it's been eight months of
adjustments, eight months of fun, eight months of new stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yeah, we went on a trip.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
We continued the adventure, but you're on the
ground, right, we're staying.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, a lot of clouds.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Okay we got that part , so we did a little bit of
traveling too.
Wait a minute now, y'all,because I was about to ask y'all
something else, but y'all been.
I know that you went to, um,some family functions abroad and
stuff like that yeah how do youtravel?
Was that different, travelingas a couple than it was
traveling as singles?
Speaker 2 (24:10):
oh yeah, oh yeah.
Yeah, it was thank god.
Yeah, because thank god youhave, I'm just gonna be real,
I'm just gonna be really real.
You have to be married going tothose countries, because it's a
lot of temptations there and Ithank God we're saved and I
thank God that we, you know thatwe won and you know just a lot
(24:31):
of crazy stuff.
It's a party country and they'dbe like we try to go to sleep,
like you know we go to sleep acertain time.
They'd be partying until 4o'clock in the morning, 5
o'clock.
Speaker 3 (24:44):
We went to Colombia.
Cartagena, colombia, we wereright behind us.
It was like a party club.
Until 4 in the morning you werehearing the basses moving.
It felt like the Spanishversion of New York.
I'm like oh another country whodoesn't sleep.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
It was right next to us too.
Our Airbnb is like the oceansright there.
It's like a beach club rightthere.
I usually wake up at 3 o'clockin the morning and pray and
stuff.
Now I hear it.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
I'm being tested, lord.
Yeah.
Well, even in that y'all youknow you're building those
memories that you know your 50thand your 60th anniversary
you're going to be talking aboutwith your family and
reminiscing about.
So even in that there's goodstuff, right, I'm loving it.
(25:42):
You know one of the things thatwhen I know, naomi, when you
were in the program, we alwaystalk about stuff like would you
tell your husband that you hadparticipated in this program?
And obviously you did right.
And I wanted to know fromMaurice what are your thoughts
now that you've, now that you'remarried?
You know we went through thecourting and the engagement and
you're married now, what areyour thoughts about a wife who
(26:04):
participated in the program, theprogram, this program, yeah and
my.
So you know we had at that timeit was called Wife Life Academy
and now it's called Positionfor Love.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
It's a similar program to what Naomi and her
friends experienced.
So what are your thoughts aboutthat?
Just curious from a man'sperspective um.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
So the program like remember I would tell you that
we would spend like weeklymeetings with her.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
She would oh oh, yeah , yeah, so so it's wait.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Preparation for marriage gotcha.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
It very beneficial.
It's very beneficial to womenout there, because there's a
saying that proper preparationprevents poor performances.
That's just giving you to copythe glory.
(27:00):
So you have to prepare to walkinto your future, amen.
So so god has sent you to help,you know, you know, prepare the
way you know, and and get hermindset right and just like and.
And it wasn't.
If it wasn't for you, god,you've, you've been used by God,
all God be to glory, then sheprobably wouldn't have, you know
(27:22):
, been sitting here right now.
I probably still would havefound her somewhere, you know,
because we meant to be together.
Yeah, yeah, but it's just, it'sgood to she got a head start to
knowing that what she's going towalk into which is very
beneficial for women and malesIf they have a male person out
there that does or you do malestoo it's just more like you know
(27:43):
it's, it's, it's it's.
It's a beautiful thing becauseit's you know, it's just it
makes things connect better.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
Yeah, and it opens you up, you know, if you are
always closed off.
That's that was my problem foryears, like I was just always I
got it, I got it, I'm fine.
For years my face would scaremen off because I was just like
I don't need nobody.
I was approached once by a guywho was like oh, can I have your
number?
I was like I don't need no man,I'm not looking for a man.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
This was in my 20s and this, and this is why we
don't have them right yes, ifyou have no need for him I think
, I think I said what happened.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
If I was that guy, what do you mean?
I have not taken her program,yet I'll be like god, just give
me business, you remember wedidn't talk about that in the
program.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
God, yes, my wife, yeah and I tell you I was single
um that the year before I metmy husband like a few months
before I met my husband, I think, I had four or five men tell me
the same thing.
I was like you were lying,wonder, god did not tell you
that.
And, and I stopped saying that,I said I can't tell you what
god did or did not say to you.
I can tell you I didn't get thememo.
(28:57):
So since you, you think youheard God tell him to send me a
memo.
Let's cut this out, cause you,you, you can tell a lie and be
responsible for it.
So stop it.
But you know this man, he, he,when he said it, well, no, I
called him a Pentecostal pimp,cause he did say that yeah,
(29:22):
you're supposed to be my wife,I'm going to marry you.
That's what he said.
Speaker 3 (29:24):
He said I'm going to marry you and I was like this
Pentecostal pimp.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
Cause this was the first week we met.
So I was like lie and wonder.
No, he said no, I'm going toprove it to you.
I'm going to prove it to youCause I already know, I heard.
I was like well, I didn't hearnothing.
So there, rolled my eyes andsucked my teeth.
Here we are right, eight yearslater.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
So to God.
Be all the glory for that.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
That went fast.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
It went really really really fast, I have to tell you
so enjoy every minute of itbecause you're right, you don't
get your time back, right?
Speaker 1 (29:51):
So enjoy every single minute and I love what you said
, that you know we have to beprepared for what we're asking
for, and I often say have youprayed before instead of wind?
Because I wind for a long time,so my prayer was really winding
right.
Have you prayed as much asyou've talked about it?
(30:13):
Have you prayed as much as youwind about it?
And also, are you reallypreparing for what you're asking
for?
Because if he should bless youwith what you've asked for and
you've spent your whole timewhining and crying and asking
him when it's coming rather thanpreparing when it gets here you
don't know what to do with it.
So a lot of times to your point, maurice a lot of times I think
sisters will um meet a good manright and then not know how to
(30:37):
handle him yeah what do you evendo with one?
because one of the things I seein the body all the time, in the
body of christ, we're taught toavoid men, women are taught to
avoid men, and then we wonderwhy they go and marry the
unsaved sister, or the sisterbarely she barely saved, I mean
barely making it, and likesliding into home base trying to
(30:59):
make it in she barely saved.
She ain't got but onehallelujah on her tongue.
But here's the thing she knowshow to handle handle him she
knows how to speak to a man.
Right, I had to relearn myhusband.
He told me.
He said you're too sharp and Iwas like so now I'm sharp and
(31:19):
I'm rolling my eyes.
So what we're?
Going to do and it's like andagain, here comes holy ghost
going.
What are we doing?
This is the one you prayed for,like, oh, it's always on me,
it's always on me.
He goes.
Yeah, because you're the onlyone you have control over that
conviction comes quick if youallow it, though, but only if
(31:44):
you allow it.
See, that's, that's the thing.
The conviction comes quickly ifyou allow it and if you heed to
it, and there's been times Ididn't, there's been times I
didn't.
I'm just at this point.
It's a lot easier not to fightthe holy ghost.
I mean, it just is it.
You know I'm just saying but,but I I could.
I pretty much gave him a goodrun for his money and you know
the word says that, um, I willnot strive with the spirit of
(32:07):
man forever.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
I'm not trying to make him mad.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
I want to welcome him into my marriage, so be that
third strand in our cord.
I don't want to grieve him.
People don't realize that theHoly Spirit has emotion, so I
don't want to grieve him.
I want him to be part of ourjoy.
My husband enjoys coming homeand I want that to always be his
testimony.
Because you're the best part ofmy day, love that, and I want
(32:38):
that to always be, because I wasa trip without luggage.
Wow, that's, that's listen.
That's real talk.
That is real talk.
That is real talk.
But, thankfully, one of thethings I say too, is that the
more we teach, the more we learn.
So, being in the position.
That father has allowed me toteach some incredible women and
(33:02):
to mentor some incredible womento the altar and the journey to
the altar it's been a blessing,because it's also blessed you
know me and my marriage becauseit keeps me on my toes.
So if, if, if I had, if I hadadvice for single women, I would
say get a mentor.
Get a mentor real quick,because it's going to cut your
(33:23):
learning curve and take out alot of the drama that that you
would have had to try to figureout by yourself, a lot of the
drama that you would have had totry to figure out by yourself.
But if you had something toshare, naomi, with the single
sisters who want to be marriedthey're tired of embracing their
singleness and they're ready toget married what would your
advice be for them?
Speaker 3 (33:42):
You need the outside perspective because what happens
is growing up.
You're really shaped by family,by culture.
So you grew up in the bubble,you know, and there's no one to
call you outside the bubble, youthink you're fine and you know
there are people that will meettheir the love of their life
(34:03):
across the street.
They were raised up togetherbut that's not always the case.
Right For me and another sisterat that time, we just there was
nobody in our circle, nobodythat we, me and another sister.
At that time we just there wasnobody in our circle, nobody
that we were attracted to in ourhome time, in our, in our.
So I was like listen.
I said either what's going onhere?
Do I have to move?
Do I have to?
You got to get out of the samecircle and get a different
(34:28):
perspective, because you'redoing the same thing over and
over and nothing's happening.
And I knew it was a desire forme to get married because God
had put that desire right.
I had never really dated mywhole life, but at 35, the light
bulb went off and I said wait aminute.
I said I want a companion, Iwant a companion.
So, speaking to another sister,besides your program, because
(34:52):
we had, I had to learn to workon some things for myself.
Stop the, you can do everythingon your own mentality.
I'm fine, I got it.
Give man a room to be a man.
That's number one.
Number two just try somethingdifferent.
I had always signed on toonline profiles, but then I
(35:13):
wouldn't like pursue anything.
I remember this, oh, and I wentback and back and I'm like
remember it was a tug of war fora long time.
So I don't know I can, becausethere could be cycles online.
But there could be cycles righthere in the street.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
I know some of them.
I'm related to some of themstreet.
Speaker 3 (35:34):
I know some of them, I'm related to some of them,
yeah, so it wasn't until anothersister got um Facebook dating
and she couldn't you knowcreated a profile and I was like
, oh, good for you, girl, goodfor you, but I wouldn't take my
own advice.
And it got to a point I waslike what?
What happens that again I hadto try something different?
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
I don't know.
And then I think I don't know.
He's too good to be true.
I remember, do you rememberthis?
He's too good to be true, Idon't know.
All right, let's see what he'stalking about.
How's it about?
(36:21):
How's what he says like, oh,this is what happened.
Oh, yeah, we're gonna let youknow.
All the team listen.
Yeah, I think not.
Right, you are the man and um,I just remember that.
Wow, oh my gosh, could thisreally be real, right?
Do you remember that?
I remember these conversationsand just checking in and I think
that is so powerful.
And it's a lot of times we thinkthat accountability is just
about people saying, oh no,don't take that person and this
is wrong and that's wrong.
But sometimes there's greenflags that we don't necessarily
(36:43):
recognize and we can miss ablessing because of our own
stuff.
And, like you said, if we don'thave a different perspective,
right, we'll just use the thingsthat we've seen in our lives
and that's not always the bestway to pursue our relationships,
right?
So here was this good man whowas into you from the beginning,
(37:03):
and if y'all haven't listenedto their interview, their first
interview was hysterical and youhave got to go back and hear
more about her Wonder Woman andhis feet and her eyebrows.
Y'all need to go back and listento that interview and, again,
the link is going to be in theshow notes.
But God knew, god knew right,and so you did a few things
(37:28):
right, just taking a chance.
And I think that one of thethings that we do is we don't
want to take that leap right,like you talked about more
recently beginning.
That's a leap of faith that wasnew to her right, but you got
to take that leap of faith.
But here is the thing what Isee a lot of us do and I'd love
to hear from you on this is whenwe're ready to take those leaps
(37:51):
, we take them alone.
So we take them ill-advised orunadvised.
We don't have a guide on theside saying oh baby, the bridge
is out, don't leap right yet.
Right, let the drawbridge comeback down.
Or somebody to say, hey, is thisa red flag?
Right?
Because I remember some of thethings in the group and we would
be like, oh my gosh, and I havea whole flag set, maurice, I
(38:13):
literally have flags.
They have red flag, white flag,black flag, oh yeah, oh yeah,
don't let me raise the blackflag.
This is bad.
Raise the black flag.
We are praying, homeboy, got togo right.
But is this good?
Is this right?
How do I, how do I answer thesethings or how do I behave or
(38:34):
respond?
And that's, I think, that's soimportant, understanding that
it's not just accountability, isnot just about well, this
person may not, you know, bemaybe leading you astray or may
not be honest with you.
It's also about, hey, this is,this could be something.
It's also about, hey, thiscould be something, this could
be something.
And I have a saying that we sayyes until it's no right,
(38:55):
because you have to let it playout.
You have to hear what a man hasto say, because in the
beginning, a man tells you whohe is and what he came for.
If you listen, but we don'tlisten because we're too busy
telling them what we want, whatwe ain't going to do, and I'm
going to tell you and you thatit's true.
(39:16):
And end up missing out on agood thing, end up missing out
on being his good thing.
Oh shucks, he's like yes.
I want the thing, hallelujah.
Speaker 3 (39:25):
Exactly, I didn't know how to talk to a guy.
I would get nervous if I talkedto a guy in church more than
five minutes.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
She was really nervous, though.
On her first date, though, umshe kept falling, you didn't
tell me that I think.
I think I don't know if I saidit or thought it so you really
fall.
You fall in love with me and Iwas there to catch her.
Speaker 1 (39:50):
I was there too, you wanted to see if you could
handle it yeah, I don't know ifthat was a test to this day.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
It's really mystery, but it was really mystery some
of the secrets we'll keep.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I love it.
So I know that you've learned alot.
You've shared a lot.
I know that you, you've learneda lot.
You, you know you've shared alot.
I'm so grateful that you,you've come back to give us some
updates.
I know, Naomi, that we spent alot of time in prep and and um,
you've shared that.
You felt ready.
Yeah, what is one thing youboth wish that you had known
(40:31):
before marriage?
One thing that's a good one,right?
Speaker 3 (40:43):
I can't wait, um, wait, hold.
On the silence.
Um, the silence game is not aseffective as you think, because
sometimes I would, just becausehe was my first relationship.
So sometimes I'm like, andsometimes we would, just if
(41:06):
something rubbed us the wrongway, we would just the phone
would go silent, but it wasnever more than like a day.
But we were, we were reallystubborn in the beginning, both
of us.
We were more like like the.
We've seen the bending and themolding, you know.
So I think one thing um, I wishwe were practicing those things
(41:28):
a little more, like morepatience and things like that
before you get married, becausesometimes you can get so excited
and we did the pre-marriagecounseling and all that but
sometimes working on thatcommunication is so key, like
having those clear things orient, you know, because sometimes
you can step into marriage withtwo different ideas and then I
(41:52):
mean I think it just everyonehas to work at it.
But taking more time to work onthe communication part and on
more of what, hey, what do youenvision this to be or that to
be?
Because you can get so excitedabout things.
More communication comes later.
I said a lot in a nutshell butI would say, uh, spending more
time communicating on what youknow what.
(42:15):
How do you see marriage beforeyou actually?
Speaker 1 (42:18):
get married.
So more time, um, likeenvisioning your time together
and your marriage and and whathave you?
Yeah, yeah, I think that and Iknow, I know you were prepared.
I know how much time we spenttalking about that and not
having Cinderella fantasies, andI mean, we worked together for
(42:42):
a while and then, even after theprogram was over, we were in
contact, still in contact, right, yeah.
We were in contact still incontact, right, yeah, but I
think there are some things thatyou won't know until you get
married, right?
There are some things whenyou're it's very different when
you're living with someone andsleeping next to someone every
night.
It's a very different thingwhen you have to make your
(43:03):
decisions together.
So I mean, there's a certainamount of prep and then I think
there's a certain amount ofpractical that it just has to.
You know, you got to walk itout, you got to walk it out.
Speaker 3 (43:14):
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, really true.
Speaker 1 (43:17):
So, talking about vision as we wrap up, what are
some future plans?
What do you all see on thehorizon for the next?
Okay, so we're eight months in.
So for the next 16 monthsmonths because that'll be at the
two-year mark so for the nextyear and a half a little bit
less than a year and a half whatare some of your visions or
goals?
(43:37):
So, um let me get this one,since she got them.
Speaker 2 (43:42):
Um, I well, we want to still go.
You know, I know the last crazystuff.
We're going from paris.
We we to still.
I still want to take her toParis some of these days Because
I know she had like a, you know, when I first met her she had
like a Paris Alpha Tower behindher and stuff and that's quite
(44:06):
after that, right.
So I want to like you know.
So I was like kind of like hervision board a little bit and
she wouldn't like always want togo.
She, you know, I know that shewouldn't go there because like
multiple advertisers that shehad.
So I want to take it to Paris,but I also want to, you know,
(44:27):
get my CDL license.
Okay, you know, I know she'sgoing to get her, like she want
to get her.
What is it?
Speaker 3 (44:34):
I was looking into notary Notary, so those are just
like what are you thinking ofdoing?
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Obviously kids.
So just kind of like, you know,move forward more financially
so she can have a choice to workor not.
But the job I'm having, the jobI'm having is actually going to
(44:58):
be used for kingdom business.
So the CDL license, not only Ijust want to be a truck driver,
but I want to Okay, it lookslike we got a little a little
lag on your internet there ablueprint.
Speaker 1 (45:17):
I'm gonna protect this conversation all right, we
kind of lost you a little bitthere, but it sounds like you're
looking towards building afinancial future and serving the
kingdom with your work.
I absolutely love it.
Thank you for sharing that withus.
(45:37):
I love it and you know, it'sreally what's really cool about
you remembering what's on hervision board and your desire to
bring it to pass.
That's what I'm talking about,and we did catch you when you
said you know, so she can havethe choice if she wants to work
or not.
Sis was like hallelujah.
Speaker 3 (45:58):
Hallelujah, that's right.
Glory, glory.
Speaker 1 (46:01):
So it sounds like the vision is matching.
I'm excited for the two of you.
So you know we're going to haveto catch up again in the future
and see how things are comingalong.
But so you know we're going tohave to catch up again in the
(46:23):
future and see how things arecoming along.
But in the meantime, thank youall for sharing with us, giving
us the updates, and for sharingwith the world.
You know your experiences asnewlyweds.
It is so impactful becausepeople don't talk about the
physical stuff, but there's awhole lot of other things that
goes into getting married andmaking it work and serving God
together.
So thank you so much forsharing it with us.
Speaker 2 (46:39):
Amen.
Nothing but love, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:44):
Love having you and I'm so grateful that you're
still on the ground.
Amen that you're still on theground.
That you're still on the ground, no more planes.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
On the time we're going again, we'll be traveling
in planes.
Speaker 1 (46:56):
So from now on, you'll stay inside the plane.
Speaker 2 (46:58):
Yeah, inside the plane, maybe harder.
Speaker 1 (47:00):
Naomi, if I were you, I'd be checking, because you
know we're one and one.
So one trip you were inside theplane, one trip you were outside
of the plane.
I don't know if it'salternating, but if I were you I
would ask some questions.
That's all.
Thank you all so much.
I will leave the links to theiroriginal interviews.
I am telling you they areabsolutely positively hysterical
(47:23):
.
Go back and listen to the otherinterviews, because you need to
know more about Wonder Womaneyebrows.
You need to know more aboutWonder Woman eyebrows.
You need to know more aboutWonder Woman eyebrows yes, they
do.
All right, until next time.
My name is Kimberly Knight andthis is the Position Podcast.
See you soon, take care.
Bye, darlings.
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