Episode 16: Mama Pimp” to Winery CEO: Survival, Street Rules & Legacy

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Barbara Parker (00:00):
Welcome to Powerfully Broken Podcast, where
we break unhealthyrelationships that negatively
impact our mental health.
Today we have with us Kitten,the founder and CEO of Nilaja
Wan Winery.
And she's going to talk alittle bit about her journey
from being a mama pimp to a mamaentrepreneur.

(00:20):
And she's going to give us whatthat journey looks like so that
we have a path out of engagingin criminal behavior just so we
can go to that next level tohave independence.

Intro (00:49):
But we already know.
When the storm rolling and yourspirit low, heart feels heavy,
and you move and slow.
Tears on your face, but youhide.

Kitten (00:57):
Welcome to Powerfully Broken Podcast.

Intro (00:59):
Thank you.

Kitten (01:00):
Thank you for having me.
Alright.
So tell me how you got in thegame.
The wine game with a hood.
The hood game.
What was it like for yougrowing up as a kid?
Tell me what that looked like.
Well, it wasn't pretty.
Okay.
So most people who are in thestreets had to go through
something to understand thestreets and to survive.

(01:22):
Um I grew up, my mom was gone,my dad was in jail.
So I was raised by mygrandmother and my uncle, who
was in prison for a long time,but you know, came home, became
my from my uncle, came my dad.
But um just growing up in ahousehold where there was a lot
of alcohol.
Um my uncle was a thug, youknow, he's an intelligent thug,

(01:46):
but he was a thug.
Um, you know, you had to get inwhere you fit in.
So I was in the streets.
I had a bunch of male cousinsaround me, and everybody was
afraid of them.
So here I come.
So, you know, I'm Aquarius andI'm left-handed.
So of course you gotta feel metoo.
How tall are you again?
We don't need to discuss that.
But I'm five feet.

(02:07):
I mean, and just now I got to120 pounds.
So I'm proud of that, you know.
But like they say, it's not,you know, how big you are, it's
the how big the fight is andfrom inside of you.
So all my life I've just been,you know, fighting to survive.
Now I was a sick kid, like theonly girl around.
So I had to do a lot of thingsthat other people might frown

(02:29):
on, but it made me who I am.
So I'm not embarrassed of it,not ashamed, and I don't regret
it because I I am who I am.
Okay.

So in you trying to fight for survival, you had
to you're one of severalsiblings.
Yes.
Um, what did your relationshipwith your siblings look like?
Because some are from your mom,some are from your dad, and you
you the oldest.

Kitten (02:57):
Yeah.
Well, I was a mom to them, youknow.
I was a mother before I hadchildren.
But, you know, being in thehood, you chose your family, you
know.
But my brothers, I love themall dearly.
Me and my brother Anthony, wecall him Tick.
Me and him like this.
Not only is that my brother, myson, it's my best friend, it's

(03:18):
my right hand, you know.
Like my mom always told us, outof everything you do, one
person has to know all yourtruths.
And that's my person, you know,with him and my husband now.
But my husband don't know halfthe stuff that my brother knows.
So you got, you know, like it'slike a work life balance.
Your work family don't knowyour home family or what you do.

(03:40):
It's like that, you know.
My kids don't know the hoodside of me.
They just know this nice,beautiful mom.
Yeah.

Parenting is sometimes having that ability to
teach your kids what the rightthing is and not show them that
other side of you.
But every now and then, themkids will try your patience.
Oh, yeah.
And when they try yourpatience, you like, you you
don't know who I am for real.
Exactly.

(04:10):
You really don't know.
And in this moment, I realizedyou don't know who is parenting
you, and you don't understandyour safety is at risk.
Man, my mama, you find me onemore time.

Kitten (04:21):
I'm finna show you you.
My mom's favorite line, Ibrought you in this room, I take
you out.
And then it got to the pointwhere I had to tell her
sometimes like, man, okay, justgo ahead and take me out.
Because I'm tired of this.
Just take me out.
Just take me out.
But yeah, my thing was, like Isaid, I'm left-handed.
So left-handed people use, youknow, both sides of their
brains.
They gotta, I'm one of thempeople, don't just tell me,

(04:44):
don't tell me, don't touch thestuff without saying it's hot.
Because I'm that person, like,well, why not touch the stuff?
Then you say it's hot.
It might just be hot to you,not hot to me.
So I have to touch it.
I'm like, oh yeah, it is hot,you know.
But I'm just, that's just how Iam.
That's my personality.
You can't just say, do thisbecause I said so, because now I

(05:05):
want to know, well, why are yousaying that?
I've never been one of thoseones that um listen, I'm always
very hard-headed.
Just to put it out there, I'mhard-headed.
I had to find out my own whyI'm not supposed to do this, why
I'm not supposed to do that.
You know.
No disrespect to my mom, mygrandmom, or my, you know,
uncles, or anybody who claimedthey helped raise me.

(05:27):
No disrespect to them.
But, you know, you only livelife on your own because people
can tell you anything, but untilthey experience what you went
through or you experience ityourself, that's the only way
you're gonna truly learn, youknow, and respect the game.

So you went from being a fighter to
transitioning into actually atone point, anytime your family
had an issue, who did they call?
Me.

Kitten (05:55):
The little short Mighty Muscle.
There you go.
I was always detract, you know,when you know, um you used to
have like street battles.
If you didn't like in Edgewood,I lived in Edgewood for a
while.
If you weren't from Edgewood,you couldn't come to Edgewood.
And you definitely wasn'tcoming to Edgewood,
disrespecting Edgewood andleaving Edgewood untouched.

(06:16):
So the thing was, okay, you getyour five toughest people, we
get ours, you know.
So they always came and got mebecause I'm I'm the toughest
anyway, but I look like I'm theweakest.
So when they had the call outround, everybody would call me.
Oh, we won't hurt a little one.
Oh yeah, okay.
That's what we hope you said.
You know what I'm saying?
So when they call me, I'm like,well, okay, you called me, but

(06:38):
I want the toughest one.
Because normally when you fightthe toughest one, the rest of
them ain't gonna fight anyway.
If you beat that person, theyain't gonna fight you.
So that's how I got my name outhere.
I did that.
Rough and tumble, you know,shorty do why they call me all
kind of stuff.
So I get out there and handlemy business.
Now I'm an OG.
So sometimes when people run afight, they'll call me like,

(06:58):
hey, this is the situation.
I'm like, uh, that's nothing.
Let that go.
You know, sometimes I have totell them, go ahead and run it.
But, you know, now I'm tryingto be better.
I'll find Jesus again, changemy life around.
So I'm trying to be better.
But you can't forget where youcome from because if you do, you
might end up in the samesituation all over again.

So when you went from having a short temper,
being the one everybody reliedon as their protector and
defender, how did you make thatshift in those relationships to
say this this doesn't align withwho I am and who I'm becoming?
How did you draw that line inthe sand?

Kitten (07:38):
I had to because once um my cousin was murdered by the
SWAT team.
And that was like my security,my other right-hand man, you
know, and um once I seen thathappen, it changed me a little
bit because I had to think,like, okay, not only am I out
here without somebody I knowdefinitely got my back, even
though my little brother, myright hand, but uh, we were in

(08:00):
situations I would never put mybrother in.
So being the one that everybodylooked up to, being the one um
that was responsible foreverybody else, I had to make
sure that they knew this is notthe right way, you know.
Like when my mom used to say,um, do as I say, not as I do, I
never got that.
But then when I got to wherepeople was respecting me and

(08:21):
looking out, oh, if she's doingthis, I want to be like her, I
want to do this.
I had to say, well, hold on.
I don't want anybody to gothrough what I went through, so
I had to change it like that andjust tell them, hey, I messed
up.
I'm failing y'all.
You know, I need y'all to bebetter than me.
And that's what made me changemy life.

Ad (08:38):
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Parker.
It's not just about endings,it's about rediscovering who you
are, reclaiming your peace, andrising stronger than ever.
Because you're not justsurviving, you're becoming.
And that's a powerful follow atQueen BL Parker or at BF

(09:01):
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Don't forget to like, comment,share, and subscribe to
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Now back to our program.

So, how did the situation come about where you
saw the opportunity to startbecoming a mama pimp?
Tell me about your firstrecruit.

Kitten (09:23):
How that happened.
Okay, so as a kid, I wasmolested, you know, by family
members and people close to thefamily, and I didn't have any
protection.
You know, I went and told somepeople, like, hey, this is what
happened.
And I don't want to put out,you know, what side of family I
told or whatever, because um Ijust don't want to nobody coming

(09:46):
back questioning because I'myou know, that's part of my life
I'm over.
Right.
And I don't know how I mightrespond to that.
If you could depend on how youcome at me and ask, depends on
how I'm gonna respond.
But um, I went to people Ithought I could trust to tell
what happened, and they kind oflike swept it under the rug,
which made me look at themdifferently, but I had to
respect them because they werefamily.

(10:07):
So I'm like, okay, well, thishappened to me, you know, more
than once.
And um, at one time it's kindof abusive, and I didn't have
protection.
So I'm in the streets, andthat's that's when I made me go
to the streets, like, okay,well, if they're not gonna
protect me, I'm gonna find myown family's gonna help me, and
this will never happen to meagain.
So I had friends, and um, itwas the one girl, we just gonna

(10:29):
say Linda, I'm gonna call herLinda.
And um, she was just out there,just you know, getting abused,
and she was a beautiful girl,you know, before she got on
drugs and all that, but she wasgetting abused, getting beat up,
and all this and that, but sheliked sex.
So no matter what, she wasgonna have sex anyway.
And me being the entrepreneurthat I am, I'm like, well, hey,

(10:53):
I know somebody has an emptyroom, you know, empty house.
This is what you like to do.
We both might as well make somemoney.
Then you be safe.
You got a house, you ain't inthe alley, you're not in the
car.
And then I got a gun, I gotfamily out here, you know, my
hood family.
We can protect you and we canmake some money.
And she was down with it, soyou know, everybody that she was

(11:13):
having sex for free, that wasbeating her and doing her wrong,
yeah.
Now you got to pay.
And they couldn't understandit.
Okay, either you're gonna payor not.
And if you're not, we're gonnakeep it moving.
But um, I ain't gonna saylucky, lucky for us, but hey,
she was homeless.
So then I got a place to lay,you can wash up, you're getting

(11:34):
paid, I'm getting paid, we gotsecurity.
After that, you know, she hadfriends.
So they started like, hey, canwe get in on this deal?
Because she was, you know, wemade sure she ate, she was
clean, we didn't force her to doanything that she didn't want
to do.
Like I said, now you got aplace, you're not homeless.
So she went and startedrecruiting people, like, hey,
they doing the same thing.
Next thing I know, I had like10 girls.

(11:54):
Like, hey, I want to do this, Iwant to be there.
So then I kind of startedfeeling bad because it's like,
man, y'all got enough money now,y'all don't need to do this.
And like I said, Linda, she shekept on doing it, then I
stopped because my consciencewas like, yeah, say what I want
to do no more.
But um, I felt bad because shegot murdered, you know, not long

(12:16):
after that.
So, you know, I still I don'tfeel responsible because I did
tell them, you know, I was doneand she could stop anytime she
wanted to, but like I said, thatwas something that she liked to
do.
She ended up mur gettingmurdered, so you know, I left
that life alone.
But it is something I did, notsomething that I could say I was
actually proud of.

(12:37):
But in the while I'm doing it,I still gave them protection.
They ate every day, they werecleaned up, they went to the
doctors, they, you know, theyweren't out here in the streets
no more getting beat up and youknow, just getting robbed, so
you know.
And then it wasn't like I wastaking all their money, it was
like 50-50.

(12:57):
So, but yeah, I changed throughout.

So her losing her shifted something in you to
where it was just like, well,actually, no, your shift came
before she even died.
Because you were you weretrying to get them to say, okay,
now that I've got thisfoundation, let me move to the
next thing.
Right.
Was it that she didn't have aview or a hope for something

(13:28):
different, or was it that um shethis is this was good enough
for her?
What do you think?

Kitten (13:36):
Well, her she just, you know, she had been selling her
body, her mom and dad wereselling her out, you know, to
get their drugs, and that wasjust what she came accustomed
to.
So um, even like I got a job atMcDonald's, I'm trying to get
her a job at McDonald's, shedidn't want to work.
That's just what she was, youknow.
She figured that's what she wasgood at, and that was easy

(13:57):
money for her.
That's what she wanted.
So, you know, even when I toldher I was done with the security
and all this, I told her, youknow, you still gonna stay here,
you know, because you had thehouse.
I'm like, you can stay here,you gotta go to the streets, but
I'm done.
I'm not doing this anymore.
And she was like, oh, okay,it's fine.
And I told her, you know, I gota friend that's a manager at

(14:18):
McDonald's, you know, you cancome work with us.
She was like, oh no, this iswhat I do.
This is what I'm known for,that's how I make my money.
I'm good.
And maybe like, maybe three,four months.
Maybe maybe a little longer.
This has been a long time, butI think about four or five
months after that, we found outshe was dead.
And they found her in thealley, so I don't know what why

(14:38):
she gave up the house orwhatever, you know.
But like, you know, you can'tforce nobody to do something if
that's what she felt she wascool at doing.
Yeah.
You know.

Um, when I worked with um so women who have
been, you know, into humantrafficking, um, either as um
one of the leaders or just, youknow, going state to state
themselves.
One of the things that was hardto get them to transition from

(15:13):
being in the life was you wantme to go from making $500 a day
to $500 every two weeks.
Right.
One, I'm not getting thatimmediate feedback of this is
what I'm gonna get.
Right.
So now I gotta wait.
So there's that delayedgratification, and then it's not
really a reward.
Right.

(15:33):
So I commend you for being ableto get out.
Thank you.
And the fact that you were ableto take care of these people
that were struggling with theirown personal trauma, you know,
and it was bore out of the factthat you had your own trauma.
Right.
Um, because your desire toprotect other people came out of

(15:55):
the fact that you weren'tprotected.
Absolutely.
And so when that happens,sometimes we go above and beyond
to make sure everybody has whatwe didn't have.
Right.
But sometimes we don't do thatfor ourselves.

Kitten (16:09):
Right.

So what are some of the ways that you were able
to protect others, but felt likeyou were still leaving yourself
not as protected as you shouldhave been, even as an adult?

Kitten (16:19):
Um, I'm a fighter.
I'm a fighter.
So my thing is, like I said, Iwas a mom before I had children.
So um my thing, I protecteveryone else.
And I don't, I leave myself.
Far as like with me being sick,I'll make sure, oh, you need to
go to the doctor, you need todo this.
I'm telling everybody what theyneed to do, but when I'm sick,

(16:42):
I'm like, oh yeah, it's okay.
I'll go to the doctor tomorrow.
I'll go, I'll put off my ownthings I know I need to take
care of because if I'm not here,who's gonna take care of this
person?
You know, my mom used to say,You fight so hard for everybody
else, start fighting foryourself.
But it's like, man, I donelived my life.
You know, death is nothingthat's ever scared me.

(17:03):
You know, at a young age, Iused to pray to die, and I would
wake up and be like, uh, I'mstill here.
Like, oh my God.
You know.
So right now I'm just to thepoint where I live my life.
I did everything I ever wantedto do, you know.
So I'm not worried about dying.
Only thing I worry about islike I hope I die once my kids
are all grown, which they arenow, and but I want my grandkids

(17:25):
to grow and not forget aboutme.
But you know, I don't want themstruggling about nothing behind
me.
But you know, death has neverbeen something I was afraid of,
so I really don't fear that.
Okay.

So before we go, I want you to tell me where we
can find all your lovely Nalajawine.
Um, and because we're alsogonna go into a segment where we
talk about you finding yourbusiness.
So you guys stay tuned for ournext episode because we're gonna

(18:00):
talk a little bit about how wegot this amazing wine.
But I want to talk a little bitabout where can they find it,
where can they buy it?
2535 Roman Row, Akron, Ohio,44320.
And you ship out wine.
So what number do they call?
330-459-9090.

(18:20):
She has 31 flavors, y'all, andy'all have no hangover.

Kitten (18:24):
Right.
So ask her rabbin's of thehood.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you don't have hangovers oranything.
No one's ever complained aboutthat.
Yeah.
It's been for a year, so.
Yeah.
And it's delicious.
Thank you.
I I buy it by the case.
Yes, she will.
Um, so again, thank you fortaking the time to be here and

(18:48):
talking a little bit about yourstory and your transition from
being um one of the Akron kids,trying to survive and entering
into protecting other people asa way to also deal with your own
stuff.
But then in that, still findthe path to greatness, which is

(19:10):
your line that is dedicated toyour legacy as well.
Thank you.

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relationships that negativelyimpact your mental health.

Outro (19:51):
Powerfully broken, but never

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Episode 16: Mama Pimp” to Winery CEO: Survival, Street Rules & Legacy

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