April 27, 2024 • 40 mins
Ever wondered how to infuse your daily grind with unadulterated joy and authenticity? That's exactly what we're embracing in our latest Proven Not Perfect episode with Lisa Kahn.
Lisa and I unpack the art of being fully present and the exhilaration of life's continuous evolution. Lisa and I celebrate the transformative process of personal growth and sanctuary.
As Lisa opens up about her journey as a female entrepreneur in the interior design realm, we're reminded of the significance of robust support networks like family and more formal networks that we develop along our journey.
We applaud the increasing role women are playing in shaking up traditionally male-dominated industries, and we celebrate mentorship that is welcoming and supportive.
The episode goes beyond the surface, examining how 2020 redefined our living spaces, igniting design trends that reflect our new normal. Lisa shares her personal quest for sanctuary amid life's storms and how this concept is intricately woven into the fabric of her design firm, offering listeners a blueprint for crafting spaces that are not only aesthetically pleasing but also deeply restorative.
Enjoy!
Shontra Powell, Proven Not Perfect™️
Drive, Ambition, Doing, Leading, Creating... all good until we forget about our own self-care. This Village of All-Stars pays it forward with transparency about misses and celebration in winning. We cover many topics and keep it 100. We are Proven Not Perfect™️
https://www.provennotperfect.com
Follow me on Instagram at: shontrapowell_provennotperfect
Check out Proven Not Perfect ™️ YouTube Channel as well. Join the community for ideas and events at www.provennotperfect.com.
I'd love to hear what you think!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, proving Not Perfect.
This is Chantra Powell, yourpodcast host.
I hope you're well.
I hope you're doing well.
Hey, look, I want to ask youguys something.
So I tend to go with these longform podcasts and sometimes it
can be a whole hour, sometimesit can be a little bit more, and
I love it because, if you know,you know, I am more free form,
(00:23):
organic in conversation.
What you hear between me and myguests is completely unscripted
.
I'm talking reality TV style,although actually sometimes that
feels like it's scripted.
So I'm not even going to saythat this is like for real.
For real, unscripted meaningI've been inspired to have a
conversation and I'm inspiredabout a topic, and nine times
(00:49):
out of 10, the actual topicconversation is a little bit
different.
But I tell you what.
They're always 100% real, 100%real.
And one of my favorite thingsis, before I post any of my
podcasts, I listen to it, not toedit it.
(01:11):
Cause if you're listening to mypodcast, one of the things you
are probably hearing is that Ido not edit it, I just do not,
um, I just don't and that's it.
And, uh, if you listen to it,when I listen to it, I get
reminded of the experience thatI had having the conversation
and smile just comes to my faceand all around my body.
(01:33):
But then the other thing is Iget excited, so excited to put
it out there at that point,because I'm like this person
needs to be heard, thisconversation needs to be
listened to, these nuggets needto be shared.
This inspiration is going tobless someone's soul and to the
glory of God.
That is the reason for Proven,not Perfect.
(01:55):
I tell you what I talk about itearlier on in the podcast
series.
I started this podcast afterrealizing that my motivators
were way on tilt.
I was so focused on theachievement and too little
focused on what it felt like inthe process and that needed to
(02:17):
flip.
It needed to flip for me, itneeded to flip for my family,
and I'm so grateful now to stillprobably do all the things,
probably even more of the things.
But I am so attuned to who I amshowing up as, what I'm leaving
behind, what I'm receiving inthe moment myself and how I'm
(02:40):
evolving at that very moment.
Evolving at that very momentbecause I've come to appreciate
that life is absolutely aboutchange and it's changed every
single second, every single newbreath that we take in.
And if you really really doubleclick and think about that for
a moment, it really holds youaccountable for choosing that
(03:02):
next breath, that next step, tobe the best one that you have
the ability to make at that time.
But it also holds up a mirrorand says what are you carrying
with you that you needed to letgo?
Do you hear me?
What are you carrying with youthat you need to let go?
Because if you truly believelife is living and changing at
(03:24):
all times, then we can choose tobe our best at all times, with
every next breath, every nextstep.
It is never too late, and theBible tells us that.
Right, but it also says that wegot to let some stuff go and
(03:45):
whatever that last breath was,whatever that last step was that
wasn't quite what we wanted itto be let it go.
It is in this place that youcan find center and you can find
peace, and that's what I wantedto share with you today.
So today's episode is with LisaConnell, and back to that, back
to the scheduled programming.
(04:05):
You're going to love her.
You're going to love her soul.
I'm not kidding you, you'regoing to love her soul.
And when you listen to thispodcast and stick around till
the better end.
You are going to hear her takeus to church when I say I
listened to this podcast justnow and I literally yelled out
in my living room preach Lisa,for real, for real, for real.
(04:28):
I did, for real.
I texted her and told her that,um, so enjoy the podcast.
Let me know on social media howyou're enjoying it.
You can find me on Facebook.
You can find me on Instagram,chantrapal.
Underscore proven not perfect orproven not perfect, um, either
one works.
You can also find me onLinkedIn, chantrapal.
(04:50):
And you can email me at provennot perfectcom.
Um, those are all the ways,right?
Dm me.
I just want to hear from you.
I want to hear, um, if you likethe long form.
If you don't, I want to hear ifyou want more than once a month
or if you want, yeah, I guessno less.
I guess no less, because if youtell me you want less than once
(05:12):
a month, then at that point I'mabout to tell you to change the
channel.
All right, I'm wishing you alllove.
Enjoy Proven not perfect.
And this is my conversationwith Lisa Kahn Allen.
Hi, lisa, hi, oh, my God, youlook beautiful, as usual.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Happy Friday.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Happy Friday.
Yes, Now you know, in podcastland it just may be Monday or
any other thing.
Somebody's listening to that,but it doesn't matter, because
whoever's listening will knowthat the vibes that are coming
together right now are Fridayvibes.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Yes, they are.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
That's electric.
It's Friday vibes, so no matterwhat day it is for you, just
think about the Friday vibes.
I'm so excited that you're inthis space with me, lisa, from
meeting you.
So I often like to sort of rollthe tape back and think about
my guests and how I met them andthe impression that they left
(06:17):
me with or made upon me and forme.
You and I were both at anannual business meeting for the
local chamber of commerce.
We just happened to be sittingat the same table, probably
drawn to the same people, but wedidn't know each other and you
(06:38):
just had such a presence aboutyourself, just a joyful Okay, so
here are the words.
What are the words in my mind?
You had like a joyful, creativespirit.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
That's what I felt.
Yes, thank you.
What a lovely thing to tell me.
I appreciate that.
Thank you Really honored to behere with you today.
Honestly, because when I firstmet you, you're electric, like
there's just something about youthat is so vibrant.
There's just something aboutyou that is so vibrant that I
just couldn't wait to get toknow you better, so really to be
in space with you too.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
All right.
So everybody knows this is likeGirl Fest, girl gang going on.
This is a treat, because so youstarted a business.
I don't know how long ago, butit is 2000.
You started Con Interior Design.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
Yep Con Design Group was what we called it in its
first iteration Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
So I want to go all the way back before we go all
the way forward, and I want tounderstand this joyful creative
that made this first impressionon me.
How did you come to be who youare today?
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Such a beautiful question.
You know, I grew up in a familyof entrepreneurs.
My dad owned a business that weall worked in when I was
growing up, and one of theaspects of that business was
interior design.
They also had retail stores anddid other things.
My mom is a designer as well,and so I grew up kind of doing
this with her and it was very,it was a very natural thing for
(08:18):
me to want to continue, you know, in that legacy really, and you
know, my mom created the mostbeautiful spaces for us when we
were growing up, and it was justalways such a.
Our home was always a verynurturing, nourishing sort of a
place to spend time.
Everybody always wanted to comeover.
When I was a little girl, likeit was just one of those things,
and my dad really taught me thebusiness end, and so I knew
(08:43):
when I went to design schoolthat I would want to open a
business of my own at businessend, and so I knew when I went
to design school that I wouldwant to open a business of my
own at some point, and so when Ihit 2000, that was the year
just all the stars aligned.
I had worked for a builder inNaples for a few years after I
moved here, so I could kind oflearn you know the market, learn
the building process.
That was not something that waspart of the kind of design we
did back in Ohio where I grew up.
(09:04):
So you know I had some learningto do but it just has been the
most joyful path ofself-exploration that I can
possibly describe to you Like Ijust really have found myself
along the way of owning my ownbusiness.
It's been big.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Wow, so there's so much there.
So I wanted you to help us tounderstand a little bit about
growing up in a household withparents who were entrepreneurial
.
You know, having dipped thewater a little bit myself as an
entrepreneur, that's it is.
It is all, all consuming and Iwould imagine, for the, the
(09:48):
product, the children in thatfamily, you're probably
receiving some reallyinteresting messages early on,
because you know my kids happento be a bit older when we did,
you know our entrepreneurialventure but, but I know they
still got some things right.
They still got some, of course.
(10:09):
So what, so, what?
What did you see?
Like what?
What were the things that madeyou say I'm drawn to that, and
what were the things that yousort of were like I don't know
if I would ever want to do that.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Well, you know it is all consuming.
I mean, there's no doubt.
And you know, one of the thingsthat I grew up understanding is
that you know, when you ownyour own business, the health of
that business, the wellness andwellbeing of that business,
really it's a family member andso that gets as much play as
anybody else in the family andit really you know that business
(10:46):
sits at the dinner table everynight.
You sleep with it all the time,like it is really part of
living and breathing.
And my mom really understoodthat and she worked in the
business too, and so when my dadwould work really long hours
and he would work weekends andall those sorts of things, they
just had a really beautifulpartnership where they would
then whoever was there and ableto, would cover, you know,
(11:06):
school events and other thingswe were doing and, you know, be
there to monitor all the otheractivities that go along with a
busy family of, you know, threekids.
So it really I think thatentrepreneurship is like a fire.
It's like a fire inside you andit's something you either have
or you don't, and it reallytakes a dedication that goes far
(11:29):
beyond, you know, a 40 hourwork week.
It is a constant companion andyou're either drawn to that and
you want to commit to somethinglike that or you just really
don't.
And I did early on.
Really don't, and I did earlyon.
And it's funny because, havingall of us work in the business
together, my parents had one ofthose old fashioned wood paneled
(11:49):
station wagons.
You remember those?
Oh, I love that and so and onsummer days, you know, when we
were off of school, all five ofus would pile into that station
wagon, we would drive to thebusiness, we would all work
there all day together, and thenwe'd pile in that station wagon
and drive home and all havedinner together.
(12:10):
So you know it.
There's also a reallyparticular dynamic that goes
along with not just starting abusiness but a family business
where everybody works together.
And how do you, how do younavigate?
You know those issues and howdo you have enough of the
business but yet you know whento shut it off so that there can
also be family time and peopledon't get burned out.
(12:32):
And how do you really navigateall of that?
Because it's very possible andworking with your family members
can be, when it is in balanceand it's a good harmony, really
so powerful because no one elsewill care as much as your other
family members, Right, andreally take it on as much.
And so I went from being partof a family business to owning a
(12:55):
family business of my own, youknow, because my husband, Philip
, works with me here, my kidshave worked with me here at
different points, and so, yeah,it's, it's good.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Wow, I love that, so all right.
So let's take this a littlestep further and talk a little
bit about being a woman startinga business in an area that
you're relatively new to.
Back, when you got here anddecided that you'd invest in
this way, what was your journeylike as a female entrepreneur?
Speaker 2 (13:29):
You know it was an interesting one.
When I first started thebusiness, for the first maybe
five years the business existedas a subsidiary of my family's
business, of my father'sbusiness, and so I had that
support system going in.
And so when I wrote my initialbusiness plan and submitted it
to my dad and said this is whatI really want to do, and my mom
(13:52):
and I said, you know, would youguys be willing to give me some
seed money to get started?
I'll pay it back.
And I really had a supportsystem there from them and that
made a huge difference.
And also the Small BusinessAssociation is an incredibly
powerful organization and Isomebody put me in touch with
them I can't remember who andthey stepped in and really
helped me at different pointsand they have, through FGCU,
(14:16):
some free services that I hadaccess to as a minority owned
business that you know.
I don't know if all businessesdo, but it really helped me
learn how to read my financialfigures and you other things
that you don't necessarily comeinto owning a business knowing
as a designer.
So that was really big for me.
I will say that you knowinterior design in the way that
(14:38):
I do it.
It has a lot of buildinginvolved with it.
You know, the building industryis a very masculine dominated
industry and a lot of ways I'mseeing a lot more women.
It always makes me so happywhen I'm out on a job site and I
see like women plumbers, and Isee you know women, you know
spackling, drywall and painting.
It makes me glad.
You know we need more women outin the workforces.
(15:00):
But it it is a very interestingdynamic because you have to
learn how to handle yourself invarious situations and be able
to carry enough confidence andenough assurance and be able to
set boundaries in ways that wedo to the very, you know, much
more specific execution buildingaspects of our work business,
(15:31):
where we're meeting with tradesand we're out on the job sites
and it's just.
You know we have to navigate alot of different things because
of the nature of this business,but I enjoy that.
It keeps it fresh.
You know it's not boring.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I think that's really , really smart what you said,
because you know, yes, we areseeing women in spaces and
places where we were nottraditionally.
Right.
Even in my corporate journey,many of my experiences,
especially growing on theindustrial manufacturing
businesses very few and farbetween seeing, you know, women
(16:07):
colleagues, but now that'sincreasing.
But you know, it's funnybecause as much as we talk about
these spaces and places thatwere not traditionally for women
, I find that some of the peoplethat have helped me to
understand how to be successfulthe most have looked exactly the
(16:29):
opposite of me.
Right, They've been white menin some instances, many
instances.
Right, They've been white menin some instances, many
instances.
And you know, I don't, I don't,I don't know what what that says
, other than if you can show upas your authentic self, ready to
(16:51):
understand the place and spacewhere you are, there's highly
likely someone who's going tohave a heart to teach and mentor
.
Right.
And I think it takes awillingness and a give on both
parts.
Right, An acknowledgement thatyou might be different in the
(17:13):
space and place, but adetermination to learn and being
maybe the majority in the spaceand place, but recognizing
there's value in differentviewpoints.
Right, it takes both.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
Yeah, I love that you pointed that out.
You know and you're right, andI think it is showing up open.
It's asking a lot of questionsand it's being humble enough to
know that you might not know andreally it's hard to resist.
I find somebody who just comesin with no ego and just is like
please show me, I don't get it,so show me because I want to
(17:47):
know.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
That's right on.
Well, I think we just gave aclue to our women who are up and
coming in their own careers.
And you know, we are ininteresting times and we all do
have our strong opinions aboutvarious things.
But one of the strategies thatI think is time tested in, true
(18:11):
is humility and a genuinecuriosity.
And if you try it, if you sodare to try it, I believe what
you said is really true.
There are very few people whocan resist a one-on-one genuine
humility and desire.
Not saying it doesn't.
There will be spaces and placeswhere, no matter how you show
(18:34):
up, it might not be your fit,but I've also learned, and I'd
be curious about you, but I'vealso learned.
If that's the case, then it'sactually not my fit.
And you know what I got to do.
I got to go, I got to go.
That's so cool.
All right, talk about design inthe sense of what you think has
(19:06):
shifted since 2020.
And here's why I'm thinkingabout that, because I feel
pre-2020, we all had a differentrelationship, for sure, me with
my house, totally different.
And 2020, really, first of all,it had me in my house more than
I'd in one year, probablylonger than I'd ever, you know,
been in it for one period oftime in life, in life, right.
(19:30):
But it also really encouragedme to think differently about
maybe historical norms aroundwhat a room should be and what a
room should say, right, what myneeds were.
And it's so funny if I invitedyou in.
Now you're like well, I thinkthis is a living room, but she's
(19:53):
got a Peloton over there andshe's got a massive table over
here and a sitting room, like Ijust think so differently around
it.
Now, is that like a thing?
Like, are people thinking aboutinterior design a little bit
different post-2020 or am Icompletely out the water?
Speaker 2 (20:11):
No, you're completely spot on, honestly, because
they're all of our relationshipswith our living spaces and our
working spaces changed foreverThrough the pandemic.
It just really did, because,you're right, we all spent time
in our homes, unprecedentedamounts of time in our homes,
and I think that we got to seevery quickly what works and what
(20:32):
doesn't work.
We got to see that flexiblespaces are really the name of
the game, because you just neverknow Does your dining room need
to be a dining room or does itneed to be a makeshift school
room?
Maybe it needs to be a Zoomtheater for a board meeting?
It really could be any numberof things.
And I find myself, as a designer, designing differently, because
(20:52):
we want to make sure that we'rebeing.
We're designing spaces that arenimble, spaces that can shift,
spaces that can accommodatevarious things, and you know
it's.
Do we have enough storage to beable to have, like in a dining
room, so that we can have traysof things where we're switching?
Okay, now we're school, so wegrab out school trays and we put
(21:12):
them down and everybody canshow up and do their homework
and do their things.
Now we're going to put thoseaway and we're going to get out
trays of things for dinnerbecause we're all going to eat
together and you know it.
Really excuse me, it's thatsort of thing, but you know
there's a bigger story there andI wonder if you might let me
share with you something that ison an even deeper level.
(21:35):
You might let me share with yousomething that is on an even
deeper level.
So 2020 was an absolutelyfascinating time for all of us
and it brought to lightsomething that had come through
for me in 2010, if you canbelieve that.
So 10 years later, a greattruth that had come to me in
2010 really came to bear, andit's this.
So in 2010, my daughter was 10at the time and she is on the
(22:03):
autism spectrum.
She has many different issuesand things, and that was the
year that she started havingseizures out of the blue.
They just started happening atnight and I will tell you, as a
mother, it was probably the mostterrifying time of my blue.
They just started happening atnight and I will tell you as a
mother, it was probably the mostterrifying time of my life that
first year really learning tocope with those.
(22:23):
Every time your child has aseizure in the beginning, you're
sure they're going to die, likeit is such a deep and
frightening time I just can'teven tell you.
And they all happened, ofcourse, at night, so she would
wake me up in the middle ofsleeping and you're just jolted
into this space of you know, acomplete kind of freak out.
And now what am I going to do?
And in the beginning there werehospitals involved and then, as
(22:46):
we got medication, you know, westarted to learn to deal with
them at home, but it was stillterrifying nonetheless.
And then really trying tounderstand what was happening
with her and why these thingswere happening.
But as that was percolating here, I was also going through a
time in my business that wasvery I don't know.
We all go through burnoutsometimes and this was really a
(23:07):
time of deep burnout for me andI was divorcing my daughter's
father.
So there were all these thingsthat were happening and I was
just at one of those momentsChantra and I know we've all had
them where you're just likethis is my dark night of the
soul, like I do not know whereto turn right.
Something has to give.
(23:28):
That was just what I wasthinking in my mind.
I was out taking an earlymorning walk.
It was still dark, I was havingmy dog with me, we were walking
around the lake behind my houseand I was out taking an early
morning walk.
It was still dark, I was havingmy dog with me, we were walking
around the lake behind my houseand I was standing on a bridge.
I just paused for a momentbecause the sun was starting to
come up, like over the trees,and I just stopped for a moment,
very caught in my own suffering.
At that time, right, I'm justthinking, gosh, something's got
(23:50):
to give, because if it doesn'tgive, something's going to break
Like I.
Just I don't know how much moreI can take.
Send me a sign, sign, oh.
At that moment, the wind sorry,it's emotional right down the
lake and as that rosy glow iscoming up, my hair was long, it
(24:12):
lifted the ends of my hair, Ihad goosebumps, like head to toe
, and on the wind was whisperedthe word sanctuary Isn't that
the most beautiful word?
I was just like what?
That is what I need.
I need sanctuary.
Chloe, my daughter, needssanctuary.
She needs a safe place whereshe's not going to hurt herself,
(24:34):
where we can all recover right,where we can all deal with all
of these things that are goingon right now.
I need a sanctuary.
And so I walked my dog home andI thought what a moment have
that word come to me in that way, right From God's lips to my
ears?
Why have I been charged withthis amazing word and what does
(24:57):
it mean?
And so I really sat with thatand I got out my journal, made
an extra cup of coffee and Ijust started like writing what,
what a beautiful word, why didthis come to me?
And I spent the next yearsreally unpacking what that is,
and I started by making asanctuary for Chloe in our house
(25:19):
because, honestly, not only washer physical safety in danger
when she would have theseseizures, but mood disorders
often come with seizures, and soit would activate really
negative and unhappy behavior inher.
She started being mean to thepets, she was mean to our other
family members, like she justwas not her best self, and she
needed a zone where she couldregulate her emotions, get some
(25:42):
of that frustration out and thenbring a nicer version of
herself back out into the familyspace.
And we were all really ridingthis roller coaster of
unhappiness with her, and as Icreated that space for her, I
really thought about it, like,what would a sanctuary look like
for her?
You know we take in our spacesthrough our senses, right?
So what is it going to looklike?
(26:03):
Beauty matters, she needs to seethings that are familiar to her
.
Sound matters.
What is she hearing when she'sin this space?
So we made sure that she hadaccess to really calming,
beautiful music.
What is she smelling?
We added aromatherapy.
You know what is she touchingand feeling.
I put a big, thick plush carpetin there so when she would fall
down she wouldn't hurt herself.
(26:24):
We moved everything down toground level so there wasn't so
far to fall.
You know, I just really thoughtabout all of these things the
softest, yummiest blankets forher to cuddle up, with big,
comfy throw pillows that shecould just beat up when she was
feeling frustrated and screaminto if she needed to, but also
sit on them and watch a programon TV, a karaoke machine so she
(26:45):
could dance in her mirror andlaugh and find happy things too.
Like I really thought about allof that and I created within
her room a toolbox for her to beable to have everything that
she could need to kind of bringherself back to center, to go
from that outward, frustratedfocus to that inward focus where
she could kind of get back tothat more grounded, you know,
(27:06):
centered, harmonious place, andit worked so beautifully.
The entire tenor of our familychanged and I thought, you know,
she's not the only one thatneeds a sanctuary.
Honestly, I need one.
It's not always easy to be hermom owning this business,
running all the things that I do.
I need a space where I can getback to myself, and you know, so
does my son, so does my husband, you know he's a musician and
(27:27):
so really I wanted him to have aspecial place for that too, and
so I systematically workedthrough the house and created a
sanctuary for everyone, and Iwill tell you that our family
life transformed into thisbeautiful dynamic that just was
supportive for everyone, and Iloved it so much that I hired a
business coach.
(27:48):
I took this idea to her andshe's like Lisa, this is so
beautiful.
This has to be the message foryour design firm.
You need to talk aboutsanctuary, but you have to live
it, and so that's really what Iwas doing at home.
So I turned the house into alab, our sanctuary lab, and so
we just tried everything.
We tried all kinds of productsand scents and layouts and
(28:09):
things.
And I did the same thing at ourdesign studio and I talked to
my team about it and we reallystarted working these elements
of sanctuary into all theprojects that we were doing.
And you know, it's funnybecause in retrospect I had been
doing that already.
I just didn't have thevernacular you know, to talk
about it.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
And so it's always right there, right Whatever it
is, it's always right there.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
It is.
And I realized that, if all, ifyou could just fast forward and
I know I'm going to sound likeMiss Congeniality here for a
second but if you could fastforward and think, if everyone
could have a space of sanctuaryfor themselves, a place where
they could go and hide when theyneed to heal, when they need to
recharge their batteries it's,it's a battery pack for your
(28:57):
soul, right?
Where do you go?
And you plug in and you kind oflevel back up.
Imagine what the world would belike if that was true.
Imagine what we would bewatching on television, the
different experience we wouldhave just driving down the road,
running into people in grocerystores, like it just would be so
different.
I'm convinced of it, and sothat really is.
(29:18):
My work in the world is to seehow much I can.
I can only create so manysanctuaries because I'm one
designer with a team.
But putting this truth togetheris my next move.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
But Lisa, can't you scale, okay?
So, oh, my God.
So much there, and you'vetriggered the business thinker
in me.
I'm telling you what.
Speaker 2 (29:58):
So, yes, you are one designer and your business and
all that and it's a high touchbusiness.
But what I lens that you canview the entire world through
and it really makes youreconsider everything from the
way you treat your body, to thefood you eat, to the way you
spend your money, to the way youspend your time and who you
surround yourself with.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Like it really is, it's a whole thing and I know
it's a pivot from fromhistorical viewpoints right,
because you know there was atime where we would be
considered incredibly selfish,maybe even bordering on a
narcissistic tendency to thinkthat every space and place
(30:42):
needed to feel like a sanctuaryfor us right.
But I think that, inparticularly now that the world
has gotten so loud and so fastpaced that you know even baby
girl Chloe and her navigation ofthis condition, I feel like so
(31:05):
much of us are being propelledinto these ways of trying to
slow things down, that many ofthe same principles that saved
her, you know, so many peoplethat we see every day at the
grocery store and on the roadneed they do.
Speaker 2 (31:24):
They do, they're just .
It's profound.
And so just to fast forward tothe question that you asked me,
which is how have our spaces andthe way we look at our spaces
changed?
So I work on that for 10 years.
Right 2020 hits and all of asudden, I look around and I said
to my husband Philip, it's now,sanctuary is now, it has to be
(31:48):
now.
And so we started writing theblog every week, when we can,
every other week, and we startwhen do we all go read this?
Speaker 1 (31:59):
Okay, this is appreciate that.
Yeah, where do we?
Or what is?
Speaker 2 (32:05):
it.
Our blog is called FindingSanctuary and it actually
resides on my design website,which is at lisacondesignscom.
So it's right there.
And you know I love the writingthat we do and I cannot tell
you the outpouring that comesback to me every single week
that I do write from people whothese messages are resonating
(32:26):
with, because it isn't just.
I'm not just talking aboutspaces in that blog, I'm also
talking about that sanctuarylens through which we view the
world.
You know, gratitude is such afoundational practice of
sanctuary because it really putsus in such a grounded and
connected place.
I think that's one of thethings that's missing so much in
our world today is connectionconnection with the earth,
(32:48):
connection with ourselves,connection with each other,
connection with the divine, allof it.
And you know it really, peoplewant to read about that, People
want to read about good things,they want a hopeful message,
people want tools, right, Ireally think that they do, and
so I really have ratcheted upour messaging since the
beginning of the pandemic, andit is something that I am
(33:10):
finding just even this week, thepeople that I'm interviewing
with as potential design clients.
The message is landing so muchdifferently with them because
they're ready.
Finally people are ready.
You know I've been working onthis for so long where people
were just like what Sanctwellbeing in the home?
Okay, maybe, but now it's likefinally everything is gelling
(33:33):
and really coming together.
So sanctuary is also an answer,I think, to how I'm viewing our
spaces so differently and I'mreally sharing with clients and
everyone who will listen to metalk to them about it.
You know, when we view ourspaces whether it's our office
or our home, even our car as asanctuary, it is a very
(33:54):
different way to look at thosespaces Because instead of just
being a place to park our car,put our groceries, take a shower
and go to bed, you know this isan ensouled environment that is
here to nourish you and loveyou and embrace you and help you
, like this is, this is apartner in your life that is
really there, you know, for you,and this is a place that you
(34:18):
can go and be your truest, mostauthentic self.
This is where the mask comesoff.
We, you know we really get tobe our most genuine selves and
get back in touch.
It's, it's like a portal wherewe go from being in the outside
world to being in our innerworld, and you know.
The purpose of it is not tohave a beautiful space.
It's nice to have a beautifulspace.
(34:39):
The ultimate purpose, though,is to have this space that gives
us access to the inside space,because where we want, the true
sanctuary is inside.
Because when we have that inside, then that is what builds
resilience.
It's what allows us to dealwith all the things you know
life is going to do.
What life's going to do it'sgoing to bring us the things
(35:01):
that it's going to bring, it'sjust how well poised are we to
respond.
And I'm convinced that when wemove in that sanctuary way and
have that landing pad forourselves, it really helps us be
more resilient and it helps ushave that fortitude inside to be
able to respond in a way thatwe can be proud of.
We respond with love, werespond with honor, we respond
(35:23):
with grace to a world that isnot always kind and loving back
to us.
But we can be that change, youknow you are on fire, girl, you
are.
Speaker 1 (35:32):
You say I'm the energy, you're the energy as
well.
That's.
This is so amazing and I thinkit's so complimentary, because
I've been spending so much timerecently talking about health
and health matters in variousforums and longevity comes up
and all the things, the messagethat you're giving, really
(36:00):
underpinning this notion ofdesign and life design.
And in particular you talkingabout.
It can be your car, it can beyour office, it can be all the
things.
What comes to mind for me iswhen we are really still.
We're capable of being our bestselves, because we are
(36:25):
receiving all that we need tofind joy in, whatever the
situation is Right, Um, thescripture speaks about be still
right and know that I am God.
Um, so it takes the rush out ofit.
Right, Because if my car is asmuch a sanctuary driving me to
(36:49):
the meeting as my home was whenI left, my relationship with who
I am when I step out of the carand my readiness for whatever
I'm about to do, man, it's allaligned Right.
You got it.
You figured that out.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
And it's good, it's a tool.
Thank you, I know I love it somuch and you know I just I
really think that, um, that veryintentional approach to our
surroundings just makes all thedifference, because intentional,
yeah, intentional, yeah,intention is the thing.
(37:29):
It makes all the difference.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
Wow, lisa, honestly I feel like we could keep going,
but there is so much goodness tounpack in just what we've
talked about that I think we letit breathe.
Yeah, we circle back because, Iwould imagine, as folks began
(37:55):
to get acquainted with your workand follow some of your writing
and really start to explore thelife that they're building for
themselves in total, sprinkledwith design, I know that we're
going to have more things totalk about and consider.
So, oh, yeah, I see you comingback, I see this being a
(38:19):
conversation girl and us justtackling some, some points
together, because I just love, Ijust love your joyful
creativity.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Oh, thank you so much , Chantra.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
This has been a pleasure.
I'll see you soon.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
I look forward to it.
Speaker 1 (38:38):
All right, bye.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
Bye.
Hey, proving Not Perfect.
This is Chantra Powell, yourpodcast host.
I hope you're well.
I hope you're doing well.
Hey, look, I want to ask youguys something.
So I tend to go with these longform podcasts and sometimes it
can be a whole hour, sometimesit can be a little bit more, and
I love it because, if you know,you know, I am more free form,
(00:23):
organic in conversation.
What you hear between me and myguests is completely unscripted
.
I'm talking reality TV style,although actually sometimes that
feels like it's scripted.
So I'm not even going to saythat this is like for real.
For real, unscripted meaningI've been inspired to have a
conversation and I'm inspiredabout a topic, and nine times
(00:49):
out of 10, the actual topicconversation is a little bit
different.
But I tell you what.
They're always 100% real, 100%real.
And one of my favorite thingsis, before I post any of my
podcasts, I listen to it, not toedit it.
(01:11):
Cause if you're listening to mypodcast, one of the things you
are probably hearing is that Ido not edit it, I just do not,
um, I just don't and that's it.
And, uh, if you listen to it,when I listen to it, I get
reminded of the experience thatI had having the conversation
and smile just comes to my faceand all around my body.
(01:33):
But then the other thing is Iget excited, so excited to put
it out there at that point,because I'm like this person
needs to be heard, thisconversation needs to be
listened to, these nuggets needto be shared.
This inspiration is going tobless someone's soul and to the
glory of God.
That is the reason for Proven,not Perfect.
(01:55):
I tell you what I talk about itearlier on in the podcast
series.
I started this podcast afterrealizing that my motivators
were way on tilt.
I was so focused on theachievement and too little
focused on what it felt like inthe process and that needed to
(02:17):
flip.
It needed to flip for me, itneeded to flip for my family,
and I'm so grateful now to stillprobably do all the things,
probably even more of the things.
But I am so attuned to who I amshowing up as, what I'm leaving
behind, what I'm receiving inthe moment myself and how I'm
(02:40):
evolving at that very moment.
Evolving at that very momentbecause I've come to appreciate
that life is absolutely aboutchange and it's changed every
single second, every single newbreath that we take in.
And if you really really doubleclick and think about that for
a moment, it really holds youaccountable for choosing that
(03:02):
next breath, that next step, tobe the best one that you have
the ability to make at that time.
But it also holds up a mirrorand says what are you carrying
with you that you needed to letgo?
Do you hear me?
What are you carrying with youthat you need to let go?
Because if you truly believelife is living and changing at
(03:24):
all times, then we can choose tobe our best at all times, with
every next breath, every nextstep.
It is never too late, and theBible tells us that.
Right, but it also says that wegot to let some stuff go and
(03:45):
whatever that last breath was,whatever that last step was that
wasn't quite what we wanted itto be let it go.
It is in this place that youcan find center and you can find
peace, and that's what I wantedto share with you today.
So today's episode is with LisaConnell, and back to that, back
to the scheduled programming.
(04:05):
You're going to love her.
You're going to love her soul.
I'm not kidding you, you'regoing to love her soul.
And when you listen to thispodcast and stick around till
the better end.
You are going to hear her takeus to church when I say I
listened to this podcast justnow and I literally yelled out
in my living room preach Lisa,for real, for real, for real.
(04:28):
I did, for real.
I texted her and told her that,um, so enjoy the podcast.
Let me know on social media howyou're enjoying it.
You can find me on Facebook.
You can find me on Instagram,chantrapal.
Underscore proven not perfect orproven not perfect, um, either
one works.
You can also find me onLinkedIn, chantrapal.
(04:50):
And you can email me at provennot perfectcom.
Um, those are all the ways,right?
Dm me.
I just want to hear from you.
I want to hear, um, if you likethe long form.
If you don't, I want to hear ifyou want more than once a month
or if you want, yeah, I guessno less.
I guess no less, because if youtell me you want less than once
(05:12):
a month, then at that point I'mabout to tell you to change the
channel.
All right, I'm wishing you alllove.
Enjoy Proven not perfect.
And this is my conversationwith Lisa Kahn Allen.
Hi, lisa, hi, oh, my God, youlook beautiful, as usual.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Happy Friday.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Happy Friday.
Yes, Now you know, in podcastland it just may be Monday or
any other thing.
Somebody's listening to that,but it doesn't matter, because
whoever's listening will knowthat the vibes that are coming
together right now are Fridayvibes.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Yes, they are.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
That's electric.
It's Friday vibes, so no matterwhat day it is for you, just
think about the Friday vibes.
I'm so excited that you're inthis space with me, lisa, from
meeting you.
So I often like to sort of rollthe tape back and think about
my guests and how I met them andthe impression that they left
(06:17):
me with or made upon me and forme.
You and I were both at anannual business meeting for the
local chamber of commerce.
We just happened to be sittingat the same table, probably
drawn to the same people, but wedidn't know each other and you
(06:38):
just had such a presence aboutyourself, just a joyful Okay, so
here are the words.
What are the words in my mind?
You had like a joyful, creativespirit.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
That's what I felt.
Yes, thank you.
What a lovely thing to tell me.
I appreciate that.
Thank you Really honored to behere with you today.
Honestly, because when I firstmet you, you're electric, like
there's just something about youthat is so vibrant.
There's just something aboutyou that is so vibrant that I
just couldn't wait to get toknow you better, so really to be
in space with you too.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
All right.
So everybody knows this is likeGirl Fest, girl gang going on.
This is a treat, because so youstarted a business.
I don't know how long ago, butit is 2000.
You started Con Interior Design.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
Yep Con Design Group was what we called it in its
first iteration Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
So I want to go all the way back before we go all
the way forward, and I want tounderstand this joyful creative
that made this first impressionon me.
How did you come to be who youare today?
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Such a beautiful question.
You know, I grew up in a familyof entrepreneurs.
My dad owned a business that weall worked in when I was
growing up, and one of theaspects of that business was
interior design.
They also had retail stores anddid other things.
My mom is a designer as well,and so I grew up kind of doing
this with her and it was very,it was a very natural thing for
(08:18):
me to want to continue, you know, in that legacy really, and you
know, my mom created the mostbeautiful spaces for us when we
were growing up, and it was justalways such a.
Our home was always a verynurturing, nourishing sort of a
place to spend time.
Everybody always wanted to comeover.
When I was a little girl, likeit was just one of those things,
and my dad really taught me thebusiness end, and so I knew
(08:43):
when I went to design schoolthat I would want to open a
business of my own at businessend, and so I knew when I went
to design school that I wouldwant to open a business of my
own at some point, and so when Ihit 2000, that was the year
just all the stars aligned.
I had worked for a builder inNaples for a few years after I
moved here, so I could kind oflearn you know the market, learn
the building process.
That was not something that waspart of the kind of design we
did back in Ohio where I grew up.
(09:04):
So you know I had some learningto do but it just has been the
most joyful path ofself-exploration that I can
possibly describe to you Like Ijust really have found myself
along the way of owning my ownbusiness.
It's been big.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Wow, so there's so much there.
So I wanted you to help us tounderstand a little bit about
growing up in a household withparents who were entrepreneurial
.
You know, having dipped thewater a little bit myself as an
entrepreneur, that's it is.
It is all, all consuming and Iwould imagine, for the, the
(09:48):
product, the children in thatfamily, you're probably
receiving some reallyinteresting messages early on,
because you know my kids happento be a bit older when we did,
you know our entrepreneurialventure but, but I know they
still got some things right.
They still got some, of course.
(10:09):
So what, so, what?
What did you see?
Like what?
What were the things that madeyou say I'm drawn to that, and
what were the things that yousort of were like I don't know
if I would ever want to do that.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Well, you know it is all consuming.
I mean, there's no doubt.
And you know, one of the thingsthat I grew up understanding is
that you know, when you ownyour own business, the health of
that business, the wellness andwellbeing of that business,
really it's a family member andso that gets as much play as
anybody else in the family andit really you know that business
(10:46):
sits at the dinner table everynight.
You sleep with it all the time,like it is really part of
living and breathing.
And my mom really understoodthat and she worked in the
business too, and so when my dadwould work really long hours
and he would work weekends andall those sorts of things, they
just had a really beautifulpartnership where they would
then whoever was there and ableto, would cover, you know,
(11:06):
school events and other thingswe were doing and, you know, be
there to monitor all the otheractivities that go along with a
busy family of, you know, threekids.
So it really I think thatentrepreneurship is like a fire.
It's like a fire inside you andit's something you either have
or you don't, and it reallytakes a dedication that goes far
(11:29):
beyond, you know, a 40 hourwork week.
It is a constant companion andyou're either drawn to that and
you want to commit to somethinglike that or you just really
don't.
And I did early on.
Really don't, and I did earlyon.
And it's funny because, havingall of us work in the business
together, my parents had one ofthose old fashioned wood paneled
(11:49):
station wagons.
You remember those?
Oh, I love that and so and onsummer days, you know, when we
were off of school, all five ofus would pile into that station
wagon, we would drive to thebusiness, we would all work
there all day together, and thenwe'd pile in that station wagon
and drive home and all havedinner together.
(12:10):
So you know it.
There's also a reallyparticular dynamic that goes
along with not just starting abusiness but a family business
where everybody works together.
And how do you, how do younavigate?
You know those issues and howdo you have enough of the
business but yet you know whento shut it off so that there can
also be family time and peopledon't get burned out.
(12:32):
And how do you really navigateall of that?
Because it's very possible andworking with your family members
can be, when it is in balanceand it's a good harmony, really
so powerful because no one elsewill care as much as your other
family members, Right, andreally take it on as much.
And so I went from being partof a family business to owning a
(12:55):
family business of my own, youknow, because my husband, Philip
, works with me here, my kidshave worked with me here at
different points, and so, yeah,it's, it's good.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Wow, I love that, so all right.
So let's take this a littlestep further and talk a little
bit about being a woman startinga business in an area that
you're relatively new to.
Back, when you got here anddecided that you'd invest in
this way, what was your journeylike as a female entrepreneur?
Speaker 2 (13:29):
You know it was an interesting one.
When I first started thebusiness, for the first maybe
five years the business existedas a subsidiary of my family's
business, of my father'sbusiness, and so I had that
support system going in.
And so when I wrote my initialbusiness plan and submitted it
to my dad and said this is whatI really want to do, and my mom
(13:52):
and I said, you know, would youguys be willing to give me some
seed money to get started?
I'll pay it back.
And I really had a supportsystem there from them and that
made a huge difference.
And also the Small BusinessAssociation is an incredibly
powerful organization and Isomebody put me in touch with
them I can't remember who andthey stepped in and really
helped me at different pointsand they have, through FGCU,
(14:16):
some free services that I hadaccess to as a minority owned
business that you know.
I don't know if all businessesdo, but it really helped me
learn how to read my financialfigures and you other things
that you don't necessarily comeinto owning a business knowing
as a designer.
So that was really big for me.
I will say that you knowinterior design in the way that
(14:38):
I do it.
It has a lot of buildinginvolved with it.
You know, the building industryis a very masculine dominated
industry and a lot of ways I'mseeing a lot more women.
It always makes me so happywhen I'm out on a job site and I
see like women plumbers, and Isee you know women, you know
spackling, drywall and painting.
It makes me glad.
You know we need more women outin the workforces.
(15:00):
But it it is a very interestingdynamic because you have to
learn how to handle yourself invarious situations and be able
to carry enough confidence andenough assurance and be able to
set boundaries in ways that wedo to the very, you know, much
more specific execution buildingaspects of our work business,
(15:31):
where we're meeting with tradesand we're out on the job sites
and it's just.
You know we have to navigate alot of different things because
of the nature of this business,but I enjoy that.
It keeps it fresh.
You know it's not boring.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I think that's really , really smart what you said,
because you know, yes, we areseeing women in spaces and
places where we were nottraditionally.
Right.
Even in my corporate journey,many of my experiences,
especially growing on theindustrial manufacturing
businesses very few and farbetween seeing, you know, women
(16:07):
colleagues, but now that'sincreasing.
But you know, it's funnybecause as much as we talk about
these spaces and places thatwere not traditionally for women
, I find that some of the peoplethat have helped me to
understand how to be successfulthe most have looked exactly the
(16:29):
opposite of me.
Right, They've been white menin some instances, many
instances.
Right, They've been white menin some instances, many
instances.
And you know, I don't, I don't,I don't know what what that says
, other than if you can show upas your authentic self, ready to
(16:51):
understand the place and spacewhere you are, there's highly
likely someone who's going tohave a heart to teach and mentor
.
Right.
And I think it takes awillingness and a give on both
parts.
Right, An acknowledgement thatyou might be different in the
(17:13):
space and place, but adetermination to learn and being
maybe the majority in the spaceand place, but recognizing
there's value in differentviewpoints.
Right, it takes both.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
Yeah, I love that you pointed that out.
You know and you're right, andI think it is showing up open.
It's asking a lot of questionsand it's being humble enough to
know that you might not know andreally it's hard to resist.
I find somebody who just comesin with no ego and just is like
please show me, I don't get it,so show me because I want to
(17:47):
know.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
That's right on.
Well, I think we just gave aclue to our women who are up and
coming in their own careers.
And you know, we are ininteresting times and we all do
have our strong opinions aboutvarious things.
But one of the strategies thatI think is time tested in, true
(18:11):
is humility and a genuinecuriosity.
And if you try it, if you sodare to try it, I believe what
you said is really true.
There are very few people whocan resist a one-on-one genuine
humility and desire.
Not saying it doesn't.
There will be spaces and placeswhere, no matter how you show
(18:34):
up, it might not be your fit,but I've also learned, and I'd
be curious about you, but I'vealso learned.
If that's the case, then it'sactually not my fit.
And you know what I got to do.
I got to go, I got to go.
That's so cool.
All right, talk about design inthe sense of what you think has
(19:06):
shifted since 2020.
And here's why I'm thinkingabout that, because I feel
pre-2020, we all had a differentrelationship, for sure, me with
my house, totally different.
And 2020, really, first of all,it had me in my house more than
I'd in one year, probablylonger than I'd ever, you know,
been in it for one period oftime in life, in life, right.
(19:30):
But it also really encouragedme to think differently about
maybe historical norms aroundwhat a room should be and what a
room should say, right, what myneeds were.
And it's so funny if I invitedyou in.
Now you're like well, I thinkthis is a living room, but she's
(19:53):
got a Peloton over there andshe's got a massive table over
here and a sitting room, like Ijust think so differently around
it.
Now, is that like a thing?
Like, are people thinking aboutinterior design a little bit
different post-2020 or am Icompletely out the water?
Speaker 2 (20:11):
No, you're completely spot on, honestly, because
they're all of our relationshipswith our living spaces and our
working spaces changed foreverThrough the pandemic.
It just really did, because,you're right, we all spent time
in our homes, unprecedentedamounts of time in our homes,
and I think that we got to seevery quickly what works and what
(20:32):
doesn't work.
We got to see that flexiblespaces are really the name of
the game, because you just neverknow Does your dining room need
to be a dining room or does itneed to be a makeshift school
room?
Maybe it needs to be a Zoomtheater for a board meeting?
It really could be any numberof things.
And I find myself, as a designer, designing differently, because
(20:52):
we want to make sure that we'rebeing.
We're designing spaces that arenimble, spaces that can shift,
spaces that can accommodatevarious things, and you know
it's.
Do we have enough storage to beable to have, like in a dining
room, so that we can have traysof things where we're switching?
Okay, now we're school, so wegrab out school trays and we put
(21:12):
them down and everybody canshow up and do their homework
and do their things.
Now we're going to put thoseaway and we're going to get out
trays of things for dinnerbecause we're all going to eat
together and you know it.
Really excuse me, it's thatsort of thing, but you know
there's a bigger story there andI wonder if you might let me
share with you something that ison an even deeper level.
(21:35):
You might let me share with yousomething that is on an even
deeper level.
So 2020 was an absolutelyfascinating time for all of us
and it brought to lightsomething that had come through
for me in 2010, if you canbelieve that.
So 10 years later, a greattruth that had come to me in
2010 really came to bear, andit's this.
So in 2010, my daughter was 10at the time and she is on the
(22:03):
autism spectrum.
She has many different issuesand things, and that was the
year that she started havingseizures out of the blue.
They just started happening atnight and I will tell you, as a
mother, it was probably the mostterrifying time of my blue.
They just started happening atnight and I will tell you as a
mother, it was probably the mostterrifying time of my life that
first year really learning tocope with those.
(22:23):
Every time your child has aseizure in the beginning, you're
sure they're going to die, likeit is such a deep and
frightening time I just can'teven tell you.
And they all happened, ofcourse, at night, so she would
wake me up in the middle ofsleeping and you're just jolted
into this space of you know, acomplete kind of freak out.
And now what am I going to do?
And in the beginning there werehospitals involved and then, as
(22:46):
we got medication, you know, westarted to learn to deal with
them at home, but it was stillterrifying nonetheless.
And then really trying tounderstand what was happening
with her and why these thingswere happening.
But as that was percolating here, I was also going through a
time in my business that wasvery I don't know.
We all go through burnoutsometimes and this was really a
(23:07):
time of deep burnout for me andI was divorcing my daughter's
father.
So there were all these thingsthat were happening and I was
just at one of those momentsChantra and I know we've all had
them where you're just likethis is my dark night of the
soul, like I do not know whereto turn right.
Something has to give.
(23:28):
That was just what I wasthinking in my mind.
I was out taking an earlymorning walk.
It was still dark, I was havingmy dog with me, we were walking
around the lake behind my houseand I was out taking an early
morning walk.
It was still dark, I was havingmy dog with me, we were walking
around the lake behind my houseand I was standing on a bridge.
I just paused for a momentbecause the sun was starting to
come up, like over the trees,and I just stopped for a moment,
very caught in my own suffering.
At that time, right, I'm justthinking, gosh, something's got
(23:50):
to give, because if it doesn'tgive, something's going to break
Like I.
Just I don't know how much moreI can take.
Send me a sign, sign, oh.
At that moment, the wind sorry,it's emotional right down the
lake and as that rosy glow iscoming up, my hair was long, it
(24:12):
lifted the ends of my hair, Ihad goosebumps, like head to toe
, and on the wind was whisperedthe word sanctuary Isn't that
the most beautiful word?
I was just like what?
That is what I need.
I need sanctuary.
Chloe, my daughter, needssanctuary.
She needs a safe place whereshe's not going to hurt herself,
(24:34):
where we can all recover right,where we can all deal with all
of these things that are goingon right now.
I need a sanctuary.
And so I walked my dog home andI thought what a moment have
that word come to me in that way, right From God's lips to my
ears?
Why have I been charged withthis amazing word and what does
(24:57):
it mean?
And so I really sat with thatand I got out my journal, made
an extra cup of coffee and Ijust started like writing what,
what a beautiful word, why didthis come to me?
And I spent the next yearsreally unpacking what that is,
and I started by making asanctuary for Chloe in our house
(25:19):
because, honestly, not only washer physical safety in danger
when she would have theseseizures, but mood disorders
often come with seizures, and soit would activate really
negative and unhappy behavior inher.
She started being mean to thepets, she was mean to our other
family members, like she justwas not her best self, and she
needed a zone where she couldregulate her emotions, get some
(25:42):
of that frustration out and thenbring a nicer version of
herself back out into the familyspace.
And we were all really ridingthis roller coaster of
unhappiness with her, and as Icreated that space for her, I
really thought about it, like,what would a sanctuary look like
for her?
You know we take in our spacesthrough our senses, right?
So what is it going to looklike?
(26:03):
Beauty matters, she needs to seethings that are familiar to her
.
Sound matters.
What is she hearing when she'sin this space?
So we made sure that she hadaccess to really calming,
beautiful music.
What is she smelling?
We added aromatherapy.
You know what is she touchingand feeling.
I put a big, thick plush carpetin there so when she would fall
down she wouldn't hurt herself.
(26:24):
We moved everything down toground level so there wasn't so
far to fall.
You know, I just really thoughtabout all of these things the
softest, yummiest blankets forher to cuddle up, with big,
comfy throw pillows that shecould just beat up when she was
feeling frustrated and screaminto if she needed to, but also
sit on them and watch a programon TV, a karaoke machine so she
(26:45):
could dance in her mirror andlaugh and find happy things too.
Like I really thought about allof that and I created within
her room a toolbox for her to beable to have everything that
she could need to kind of bringherself back to center, to go
from that outward, frustratedfocus to that inward focus where
she could kind of get back tothat more grounded, you know,
(27:06):
centered, harmonious place, andit worked so beautifully.
The entire tenor of our familychanged and I thought, you know,
she's not the only one thatneeds a sanctuary.
Honestly, I need one.
It's not always easy to be hermom owning this business,
running all the things that I do.
I need a space where I can getback to myself, and you know, so
does my son, so does my husband, you know he's a musician and
(27:27):
so really I wanted him to have aspecial place for that too, and
so I systematically workedthrough the house and created a
sanctuary for everyone, and Iwill tell you that our family
life transformed into thisbeautiful dynamic that just was
supportive for everyone, and Iloved it so much that I hired a
business coach.
(27:48):
I took this idea to her andshe's like Lisa, this is so
beautiful.
This has to be the message foryour design firm.
You need to talk aboutsanctuary, but you have to live
it, and so that's really what Iwas doing at home.
So I turned the house into alab, our sanctuary lab, and so
we just tried everything.
We tried all kinds of productsand scents and layouts and
(28:09):
things.
And I did the same thing at ourdesign studio and I talked to
my team about it and we reallystarted working these elements
of sanctuary into all theprojects that we were doing.
And you know, it's funnybecause in retrospect I had been
doing that already.
I just didn't have thevernacular you know, to talk
about it.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
And so it's always right there, right Whatever it
is, it's always right there.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
It is.
And I realized that, if all, ifyou could just fast forward and
I know I'm going to sound likeMiss Congeniality here for a
second but if you could fastforward and think, if everyone
could have a space of sanctuaryfor themselves, a place where
they could go and hide when theyneed to heal, when they need to
recharge their batteries it's,it's a battery pack for your
(28:57):
soul, right?
Where do you go?
And you plug in and you kind oflevel back up.
Imagine what the world would belike if that was true.
Imagine what we would bewatching on television, the
different experience we wouldhave just driving down the road,
running into people in grocerystores, like it just would be so
different.
I'm convinced of it, and sothat really is.
(29:18):
My work in the world is to seehow much I can.
I can only create so manysanctuaries because I'm one
designer with a team.
But putting this truth togetheris my next move.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
But Lisa, can't you scale, okay?
So, oh, my God.
So much there, and you'vetriggered the business thinker
in me.
I'm telling you what.
Speaker 2 (29:58):
So, yes, you are one designer and your business and
all that and it's a high touchbusiness.
But what I lens that you canview the entire world through
and it really makes youreconsider everything from the
way you treat your body, to thefood you eat, to the way you
spend your money, to the way youspend your time and who you
surround yourself with.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Like it really is, it's a whole thing and I know
it's a pivot from fromhistorical viewpoints right,
because you know there was atime where we would be
considered incredibly selfish,maybe even bordering on a
narcissistic tendency to thinkthat every space and place
(30:42):
needed to feel like a sanctuaryfor us right.
But I think that, inparticularly now that the world
has gotten so loud and so fastpaced that you know even baby
girl Chloe and her navigation ofthis condition, I feel like so
(31:05):
much of us are being propelledinto these ways of trying to
slow things down, that many ofthe same principles that saved
her, you know, so many peoplethat we see every day at the
grocery store and on the roadneed they do.
Speaker 2 (31:24):
They do, they're just .
It's profound.
And so just to fast forward tothe question that you asked me,
which is how have our spaces andthe way we look at our spaces
changed?
So I work on that for 10 years.
Right 2020 hits and all of asudden, I look around and I said
to my husband Philip, it's now,sanctuary is now, it has to be
(31:48):
now.
And so we started writing theblog every week, when we can,
every other week, and we startwhen do we all go read this?
Speaker 1 (31:59):
Okay, this is appreciate that.
Yeah, where do we?
Or what is?
Speaker 2 (32:05):
it.
Our blog is called FindingSanctuary and it actually
resides on my design website,which is at lisacondesignscom.
So it's right there.
And you know I love the writingthat we do and I cannot tell
you the outpouring that comesback to me every single week
that I do write from people whothese messages are resonating
(32:26):
with, because it isn't just.
I'm not just talking aboutspaces in that blog, I'm also
talking about that sanctuarylens through which we view the
world.
You know, gratitude is such afoundational practice of
sanctuary because it really putsus in such a grounded and
connected place.
I think that's one of thethings that's missing so much in
our world today is connectionconnection with the earth,
(32:48):
connection with ourselves,connection with each other,
connection with the divine, allof it.
And you know it really, peoplewant to read about that, People
want to read about good things,they want a hopeful message,
people want tools, right, Ireally think that they do, and
so I really have ratcheted upour messaging since the
beginning of the pandemic, andit is something that I am
(33:10):
finding just even this week, thepeople that I'm interviewing
with as potential design clients.
The message is landing so muchdifferently with them because
they're ready.
Finally people are ready.
You know I've been working onthis for so long where people
were just like what Sanctwellbeing in the home?
Okay, maybe, but now it's likefinally everything is gelling
(33:33):
and really coming together.
So sanctuary is also an answer,I think, to how I'm viewing our
spaces so differently and I'mreally sharing with clients and
everyone who will listen to metalk to them about it.
You know, when we view ourspaces whether it's our office
or our home, even our car as asanctuary, it is a very
(33:54):
different way to look at thosespaces Because instead of just
being a place to park our car,put our groceries, take a shower
and go to bed, you know this isan ensouled environment that is
here to nourish you and loveyou and embrace you and help you
, like this is, this is apartner in your life that is
really there, you know, for you,and this is a place that you
(34:18):
can go and be your truest, mostauthentic self.
This is where the mask comesoff.
We, you know we really get tobe our most genuine selves and
get back in touch.
It's, it's like a portal wherewe go from being in the outside
world to being in our innerworld, and you know.
The purpose of it is not tohave a beautiful space.
It's nice to have a beautifulspace.
(34:39):
The ultimate purpose, though,is to have this space that gives
us access to the inside space,because where we want, the true
sanctuary is inside.
Because when we have that inside, then that is what builds
resilience.
It's what allows us to dealwith all the things you know
life is going to do.
What life's going to do it'sgoing to bring us the things
(35:01):
that it's going to bring, it'sjust how well poised are we to
respond.
And I'm convinced that when wemove in that sanctuary way and
have that landing pad forourselves, it really helps us be
more resilient and it helps ushave that fortitude inside to be
able to respond in a way thatwe can be proud of.
We respond with love, werespond with honor, we respond
(35:23):
with grace to a world that isnot always kind and loving back
to us.
But we can be that change, youknow you are on fire, girl, you
are.
Speaker 1 (35:32):
You say I'm the energy, you're the energy as
well.
That's.
This is so amazing and I thinkit's so complimentary, because
I've been spending so much timerecently talking about health
and health matters in variousforums and longevity comes up
and all the things, the messagethat you're giving, really
(36:00):
underpinning this notion ofdesign and life design.
And in particular you talkingabout.
It can be your car, it can beyour office, it can be all the
things.
What comes to mind for me iswhen we are really still.
We're capable of being our bestselves, because we are
(36:25):
receiving all that we need tofind joy in, whatever the
situation is Right, Um, thescripture speaks about be still
right and know that I am God.
Um, so it takes the rush out ofit.
Right, Because if my car is asmuch a sanctuary driving me to
(36:49):
the meeting as my home was whenI left, my relationship with who
I am when I step out of the carand my readiness for whatever
I'm about to do, man, it's allaligned Right.
You got it.
You figured that out.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
And it's good, it's a tool.
Thank you, I know I love it somuch and you know I just I
really think that, um, that veryintentional approach to our
surroundings just makes all thedifference, because intentional,
yeah, intentional, yeah,intention is the thing.
(37:29):
It makes all the difference.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
Wow, lisa, honestly I feel like we could keep going,
but there is so much goodness tounpack in just what we've
talked about that I think we letit breathe.
Yeah, we circle back because, Iwould imagine, as folks began
(37:55):
to get acquainted with your workand follow some of your writing
and really start to explore thelife that they're building for
themselves in total, sprinkledwith design, I know that we're
going to have more things totalk about and consider.
So, oh, yeah, I see you comingback, I see this being a
(38:19):
conversation girl and us justtackling some, some points
together, because I just love, Ijust love your joyful
creativity.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Oh, thank you so much , Chantra.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
This has been a pleasure.
I'll see you soon.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
I look forward to it.
Speaker 1 (38:38):
All right, bye.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
Bye.
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