August 11, 2025 • 24 mins
The Secret Life of Your Inner Monologue: Navigating and Harnessing Your Inner Voice
In this episode of PsyberSpace, host Leslie Poston explores the concept of the inner monologue, discussing its origins, functions, and variations across individuals and cultures. The episode digs into the impact of internal speech on decision making, emotional regulation, and self-identity. Leslie also addresses how disorders like ADHD and anxiety affect inner voices, offering practical strategies for managing critical self-talk and cultivating a more supportive inner dialogue. Listeners are encouraged to observe and reframe their inner thoughts to enhance mental wellbeing and performance.
00:00 Introduction: The Inner Monologue
00:49 The Role and Impact of Inner Speech
04:05 Development of Inner Speech
07:07 Variations in Inner Speech
09:34 Inner Speech and Mental Health
20:58 Transforming Your Inner Critic
24:18 Conclusion: Embracing Your Inner Voice
Research
Alderson-Day, B., & Fernyhough, C. (2015). Inner speech: Development, cognitive functions, phenomenology, and neurobiology. Psychological Bulletin, 141(5), 931–965. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4538954
Dahò, M., & Monzani, D. (2025). The multifaceted nature of inner speech: Neural and phenomenological perspectives. Cognitive Neuropsychology, 12(3), 145–167. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/40611622/
Gregory, D. (2020). Inner speech: New voices. Analysis, Volume 80, Issue 1, January 2020, Pages 164–173, https://doi.org/10.1093/analys/anz096
Gregory, D., & Langland-Hassan, P. (2023). Inner speech. Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy. https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/inner-speech/
Hurlburt, R. T., Heavey, C. L., & Kelsey, J. M. (2013). Toward a phenomenology of inner speaking. Consciousness and Cognition. 22(4) Pages 1477-1494
McCarthy-Jones, S., & Fernyhough, C. (2011). The varieties of inner speech: Links between quality of inner speech and psychopathological variables in a sample of young adults. Consciousness and Cognition, 20(4), 1586–1593. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21880511/
Morin, A. (2003). Inner speech and conscious experience. Science & Consciousness Review, No 4. https://journalpsyche.org/articles/0xc094.pdf
Nedergaard, J. S. K., & Lupyan, G. (2024). Not everybody has an inner voice: Behavioral consequences of anendophasia. Psychological Science, 35(4), 344–360. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/09567976241243004
Alderson-Day, B. & Pearson, A. (2023). What can neurodiversity tell us about inner speech, and vice versa? A theroetical perspectiv. Cortex, 168, Pages 193-202 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S001094522300206X
Vicente, A., & Martinez Manrique, F. (2011). Inner Speech: Nature and Functions. Philosophy Compass, 6, 209-219. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1747-9991.2010.00369.x
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Leslie Poston (00:12):
Welcome back to PsyberSpace. I'm your host,
Leslie Poston. Today, we'reasking, if your brain had
subtitles, would you beembarrassed or impressed? Most
of us live with a voice in ourhead. Sometimes it cheers us on,
and sometimes it narrateseverything we do.
Sometimes it's a little too meanfor comfort. And right now, even
(00:36):
as you're listening to this,there might be another
conversation happening entirelyin your mind. Maybe you're
thinking about what do you needto do later, or you're already
forming opinions about whatwe're talking about today. That
voice is your inner monologue.It's one of the most private and
powerful parts of yourpsychological world.
(00:57):
It helps you plan, reflect,regulate your emotions, and
rehearse your life. But it canalso trap you, bully you, or
talk you out of things you careabout. This episode is about the
secret life of that voice, howit forms, how it varies across
people and cultures, and how youmake peace with it or even make
(01:17):
it work for you. Because here'sthe thing, that voice isn't just
commentary on your life, It'sactively shaping who you become.
Your inner monologue is with youalmost constantly.
Right now, while you'relistening to me, a part of your
brain might be having a parallelconversation. You're not just
(01:40):
passively receiving information.You're responding to it,
questioning it, connecting it toyour own experiences. This is
what makes human cognition soremarkably sophisticated. We
don't just think.
We think about thinking. We talkourselves through tasks, imagine
conversations that haven'thappened yet, and replay ones
(02:02):
that have. We give ourselvesinstructions. Don't forget to
pick up milk. We offerencouragement.
You can handle thispresentation. We provide harsh
critiques. Why did you say that?Some people think primarily in
words with a constant stream ofverbal commentary running
(02:22):
through their mind. Others thinkmore in pictures, sounds, or
physical sensations.
But most of us have some form ofinternal speech even if we're
not always aware of it. What'sfascinating is how unconscious
this process usually is. Yourinner voice feels like the
background noise of being alive.It's so constant that you might
(02:46):
not notice it's there. It's likethe of an air conditioner.
You only become aware of it whenit stops. But this seemingly
automatic chatter plays aprofound role in how you make
decisions, regulate emotions,solve problems, and form your
sense of self. Think about thelast time you had to make a
(03:06):
difficult decision. Chances areyou didn't just weigh the option
silently. You probably hadentire conversations with
yourself.
If I take this job, I'll makemore money, but the commute will
be terrible. And what if I hateit, but then again, staying here
means this internal dialogueisn't just reflecting your
(03:28):
thought process. It's actuallyorganizing your thoughts. It
helps you work throughcomplexity in a way that pure
intuition or emotion alone justcan't manage. As psychologists,
we define inner speech as thesilent internal use of language
to think and self regulate.
(03:51):
It's not the same as hearingvoices or auditory
hallucinations. This is your ownvoice generated by your own mind
talking to you in a process youcontrol even when it doesn't
always feel that way. But howdoes this extraordinary ability
develop? We're not born with aninner monologue. Babies don't
(04:12):
have little voices in theirheads giving them running
commentary of their whole day.
This capacity emerges through adevelopmental process that
transforms social interactioninto private thought. The
developmental pathway goessomething like this. Young
children talk out loudconstantly. They narrate their
(04:33):
play, giving themselvesinstructions, and working
through problems verbally outloud. Now I'm putting the red
block on top.
No. That doesn't work. I'll trythe blue one. If you've seen any
of the little kids skiing videoson TikTok and you've heard
parents put a mic in their kid'shelmet, you can hear these cute,
(04:53):
adorable three and four year oldchildren narrating their way
down the entire mountain whilethey ski. This isn't just cute
kid behavior.
It's cognitive scaffolding inaction. They're using language
as a tool to organize theirthinking and to guide their
behavior. As children develop,this external speech gradually
(05:14):
moves inward. First, they mightwhisper to themselves, then they
mouth their words silently.Finally, speech becomes fully
internal.
But here's a crucial part. Thefunction remains the same. That
inner voice is still serving asa cognitive tool, helping to
organize thought, maintainattention, and regulate
(05:37):
behavior. It's just moved fromthe outside world into the
private realm of consciousness.This process shows us something
profound about the nature ofhuman thinking.
We don't just use language tocommunicate with others. We use
it to communicate withourselves. We've essentially
internalized the social processof conversation and turned it
(05:59):
into a tool for individualcognition. Inner speech isn't
just a reflection of thought.It's actively shaping how we
think.
When you talk through a probleminternally, you're not just
describing your thought process.You're structuring it. The
linear sequential nature oflanguage is forcing you to
(06:20):
organize your ideas in real timeone after another. This can help
clarify confusing situations,work through logical sequences,
and hold multiple pieces ofinformation in working memory
simultaneously. But inner speechserves many functions beyond
problem solving.
(06:40):
It's how we rehearse for futureevents, process past
experiences, and regulate ouremotional responses. It's the
mechanism by which we giveourselves instructions,
encouragement, or criticism.It's also how we simulate social
interactions, imagining whatothers might think or say in
(07:00):
various situations. Here's wherethings get really interesting.
Not everyone experiences theinner monologue the same way.
This might come as a shock ifyou're someone with a constant
stream of verbal thought, butsome people have very little
internal dialogue. Others havenone at all. Research using
(07:23):
sophisticated sampling methodshas revealed enormous variation
in how people experience theirown minds. Some individuals
report rich constant internalnarratives like having a radio
talk show running in their headall day. Others experience inner
speech only occasionally whenworking through specific
(07:44):
problems or in particularsituations.
Still others report that theirthinking happens through images,
sensations, or abstract conceptswithout much verbal content at
all. This variation isn't justacademic curiosity. It has real
implications for how peoplenavigate the world. Someone
(08:04):
without much inner speech mightprocess information more
holistically or intuitively.They might be less likely to
second guess themselves or getcaught in loops of rumination.
On the flip side, they might notbenefit from the organizing and
regulatory functions that innerspeech can provide. Cultural
differences add another layer ofcomplexity. Different cultures
(08:27):
have varying attitudes towardintrospection and self
reflection. Some traditionsencourage detailed internal
dialogue as a path to wisdom andself understanding. Others view
excessive self focus aspotentially harmful, emphasizing
present moment awareness orcommunity oriented thinking
instead.
(08:48):
Language structure itselfinfluences inner speech
patterns. If you grew upbilingual or multilingual, you
might find that your innermonologue switches between
languages depending on context,emotion, or the type of thinking
you're doing. Some people reportthat different languages access
different aspects of theirpersonality or different types
(09:10):
of memories. These neurologicaland cultural variations remind
us of something critical. Theway you think internally is not
a moral trait or a sign ofintelligence.
It's simply one of manycognitive styles shaped by
biology, development, andculture. There's no right way to
have an inner voice or to nothave one. For people with ADHD
(09:35):
or anxiety disorders, innermonologues can feel less like a
helpful companion and more likea chaotic committee meeting
where everyone's talking atonce. Thoughts ricochet from
topic to topic. Tasks arestarted, narrated, interrupted
by other thoughts, abandoned,restarted with different
commentary, and then droppedagain for something entirely
(09:58):
new.
If you have ADHD, your innervoice might not provide the same
organizational support that itdoes for neurotypical brains. A
guide helping you through tasks.It might jump around and get
distracted by interestingtangents or simply fail to kick
in when you need it the most.You might find yourself needing
(10:18):
to talk out loud to organizecomplex tasks, essentially using
external speech because yourinternal speech is not providing
adequate cognitive scaffolding.This is not a character flaw or
a sign of laziness.
It's a brain doing its best tomanage challenges with working
memory, attention regulation,and impulse control. The ADHD
(10:41):
brain is just wired differently,and sometimes that means the
usual cognitive tools, they workdifferently too. For people with
anxiety and some traumasurvivors, inner speech can
become dominated by worry,catastrophic thinking, or
hypervigilance. The inner voicemight consistently scan for
potential threats, replayembarrassing moments, or
(11:02):
generate endless what ifscenarios. What if I said that
wrong thing in that meeting?
What if my boss thinks I'mincompetent? Or what if I get
fired? Then what if I can't findanother job? This anxious inner
dialogue isn't choosing to beunhelpful. It's actually trying
to protect you.
The anxiety system is designedto help you prepare for and
(11:24):
avoid danger. The problem isthat in our modern world,
anxiety often goes intooverdrive, treating social
embarrassment or work stress asif they were life threatening
emergencies. Understanding thesepatterns is the first step
toward working with them ratherthan against them. For ADHD
brains, this might meanaccepting that you need external
(11:46):
supports. Writing things down,talking through problems out
loud, using apps or systems toprovide the organization that
inner speech might not supplyconsistently, or whatever method
works for you because as ADHDpeople will tell you, just
telling them to get a planner isnot the answer.
For anxious minds, it oftenmeans learning to recognize when
(12:08):
your inner voice has shiftedfrom helpful problem solving to
unproductive spinning. The goalisn't to eliminate the voice
entirely. Anxiety often containsuseful information about things
that need attention. It's aboutlearning to work with it more
skillfully. We've establishedthat we all talk to ourselves,
(12:29):
but what exactly are we saying,and does it matter?
Sports psychology has given usfascinating insights into how
inner speech influencesperformance. Athletes who use
positive instructional self talkconsistently outperform those
who don't. Keep your eye on theball. You've got this. Stay
relaxed through your shoulders.
(12:50):
Simple phrases like this do morethan just remind you of
technique. They actuallyactivate motivation centers in
your brain and help maintainfocus under pressure. But the
benefits extend far beyondathletics. The way you talk to
yourself influences everythingfrom your ability to persist
through difficult tasks to howquickly you recover from
(13:12):
setbacks. Encouraging self talkdoesn't just feel better.
It actually changes yourphysiological response to stress
and challenge. Unfortunately,for many of us, inner monologue
is anything but encouraging. Theinner voice can become a harsh
critic, constantly pointing outflaws, questioning decisions,
(13:32):
and predicting failure. Like,you always mess this up.
Everyone can see that you don'tknow what you're doing.
And why did you even try? Thiscritical inner voice often
develops for understandablereasons. Maybe you had parents
or teachers who were highlycritical of you. Maybe you
learned that being hard onyourself was a way to motivate
(13:53):
improvement or avoiddisappointing others. Maybe
criticism became a way to try tocontrol outcomes in an
unpredictable world.
But here's what research buthere's what research shows us.
Harsh self criticism is actuallycounterproductive from most
goals. It increases stresshormones, reduces cognitive
(14:15):
flexibility, and makes you morelikely to give up when faced
with difficulties. People whoare kind to themselves and their
inner dialogue show greaterresilience, more creativity in
problem solving, and better longterm performance across various
domains. The tone of your voicealso influences your sense of
(14:36):
identity.
When the internal commentary isconsistently negative, people
begin to believe that criticalnarrative represents truth
rather than habit. They start tosee themselves through the lens
of their harshest internalcritic, forgetting that this
voice is just one perspectiveamong many possible ones. This
(14:57):
is where the concept of selfcompassion becomes important.
Self compassion isn't aboutlowering standards or making
excuses. It's about changing theemotional tone of how you relate
to your own struggles andimperfections.
Instead of I'm such an idiot formaking that mistake, self
compassionate inner speech mightsay, well, that was
(15:18):
disappointing, but everyonemakes mistakes. So what can I
learn from this? One of the mostsophisticated functions of inner
speech is its role in socialsimulation. Your inner voice
doesn't just help you thinkabout tasks and problems. It
helps you navigate complexsocial world by allowing you to
(15:40):
imagine and rehearseinteractions before they happen.
Think about the last time youhad to have a difficult
conversation. Chances are youprobably ran through various
versions of it in your mindfirst. You might have imagined
what the other person would say,rehearsed your responses, and
even prepared for differentpossible outcomes. If they get
(16:00):
defensive, I'll say this. Ifthey seem negative, I'll say
that.
And if they seem receptive, Ican bring up this other issue as
well. This social rehearsalisn't just worry or
overthinking. It's asophisticated cognitive ability
that allows you to engage inperspective taking, empathy, and
strategic planning all at once.When you imagine how someone
(16:23):
might respond to your words,you're activating the same
neural networks involved inactual social interaction.
You're essentially runningsocial simulation to test
different approaches beforecommitting to an action.
Your inner voice also helps youprocess social experiences after
they happen. You replayconversations, analyze
(16:44):
interactions, and try tounderstand what went well or
what you might do differentlynext time. This post hoc
analysis helps you learn fromsocial experiences and refine
your understanding ofrelationship dynamics. The
social simulation function ofinner speech also connects you
to your sense of identity andbelonging. Much of our internal
(17:06):
dialogue involves imagining whatothers think of us, predicting
their reactions, or rehearsingexplanations for our behavior.
In a sense, we carryinternalized versions of
important people in our lives,and we have conversations with
these imagined others as wenavigate decisions and
challenges. This can beincredibly valuable for
developing empathy and socialskills, but it can also become
(17:30):
problematic when the imaginedvoices become overly critical or
when social simulation turnsinto obsessive rumination. Some
people get trapped in endlessloops of replaying past
conversations or imaginingfuture conflicts, spinning
scenarios that becomeincreasingly divorced from
reality. The key is learning touse the social simulation
(17:53):
function of inner speechskillfully, taking advantage of
its benefits for planning andempathy while recognizing when
it's shifted from helpfulpreparation to unproductive
worry. Sometimes our inner voiceisn't just occasionally
critical.
It becomes genuinely cruel. Forsome people, the internal
(18:15):
monologue sounds like an abusiverelationship happening entirely
within their own mind. The voicemight attack their appearance,
their capabilities, their worthas a person. It might predict
their failure, highlight everyflaw, and dismiss every success
as luck or fraud. This kind ofharsh inner criticism often has
(18:37):
roots in early experiences.
Children naturally internalizethe voices of important
caregivers. If those voices werefrequently critical, shaming, or
rejecting, that criticism canbecome part of their internal
landscape long into adulthood.The harsh parent or teacher
becomes an inner critic thatcontinues their work even when
(19:00):
the original person is no longerpresent. Trauma can also shape
inner speech patterns in complexways. People who've experienced
trauma might develophypervigilant inner voices that
constantly scan for danger,criticism, or signs of
rejection.
The inner monologue becomesdominated by threat detection
rather than supportive guidanceor neutral observation. Cultural
(19:25):
and systemic pressurescontribute as well. If you
belong to a marginalized group,your inner voice might
internalize societal messagesabout your worth or
capabilities. The broaderculture's prejudices can become
part of your internal dialogue,creating additional layers of
self criticism and doubt.Perfectionism often plays a role
(19:47):
as well.
The inner voice becomes focusedon impossible standards,
constantly pointing out howcurrent performance falls short
of some idealized version. Thisperfectionist inner critic often
masquerades as motivation, butit typically creates paralysis,
procrastination, and chronicdissatisfaction instead. When
(20:09):
inner speech becomes dominatedby cruelty and criticism, it
stops serving its adaptedfunction. Instead of helping
with problem solving andemotional regulation, it becomes
a source of additional stressand pain. People might start
avoiding challenges just toescape their own internal
criticism, or they might pushthemselves to exhaustion, trying
(20:31):
to appease an inner voice that'snever satisfied.
Recognizing when your innervoice has become toxic is the
first step toward changing thepattern. Often, people don't
realize how harsh their selftalk has become because it feels
normal to them. It's the onlyvoice they've ever known.
Learning to notice and nameinternal criticism can be the
(20:52):
beginning of developing adifferent relationship with your
mind. The good news about innerspeech is that it is not fixed.
Just as you develop your currentpatterns of self talk over time,
you can develop new ones. Yourbrain's capacity for
neuroplasticity means that theneural pathways underlying inner
(21:14):
speech can change with consciouspractice. The first step is
developing awareness. Startpaying attention to your inner
voice without trying to changeit immediately. Notice when it's
helpful versus when it's harsh.
Observe whether it sounds likeyou or like someone else from
your past. Pay attention to thetone, the content, and the
(21:37):
timing of your internalcommentary. Some people find it
helpful to actually write downwhat their inner voice says,
especially during difficultmoments. Seeing those thoughts
on paper can provide perspectiveon whether they're reasonable,
helpful, or unnecessarily cruel.You might be shocked by how
harsh the dialogue becomes whenyou're not consciously
(21:58):
monitoring it.
Another powerful technique islearning to respond to your
inner critic rather than simplyaccepting what it says. You can
literally argue back and say,that's not accurate. I've
succeeded at difficult thingsbefore, or you might try a
gentler approach. I know you'retrying to protect me from
failure, but this level ofcriticism isn't helpful. Some
(22:21):
people benefit from giving theirinner critic a name or a
persona.
This creates psychologicaldistance and reminds you that
the critical voice is just onepart of your mental landscape,
not the whole truth about whoyou are. You might imagine your
critic as a worried parent, adrill sergeant, or even as a
separate character entirely.Once you can see it as a part
(22:45):
rather than the whole, you canchoose when to listen to it and
when to set it aside. Developinga more compassionate inner voice
often requires concerted effort.You might need to actively
cultivate the tone you'd usewith a good friend facing the
same challenges.
What would you say to someoneyou cared about who was
struggling with the sameproblem? How would you encourage
(23:07):
them without dismissing thedifficulty of their situation?
Mindfulness practices can alsohelp by creating space between
you and your inner commentary.Instead of being completely
identified with whatever yourinner voice is saying, you can
learn to observe it with somedetachment. I notice I'm having
very critical thoughts about mypresentation tomorrow.
(23:28):
This observer stance gives youmore this observer stance gives
you more choice about how torespond. Meditation is also good
for this, and you might thinkthat your inner voice is too
constant to meditate, but partof meditation is learning to let
a thought go. So incorporatethat into these techniques as
(23:48):
well. And remember, changinginner speech patterns takes time
and repetition. You areessentially rewiring neural
pathways that may have beenestablished for decades.
Be patient with the process andcelebrate small improvements.
The goal isn't to eliminate allnegative thoughts or criticism.
Some internal feedback isgenuinely useful. The goal is to
(24:11):
make your inner voice morebalanced, more accurate, and
ultimately more helpful inliving the life you want to
live. Your inner monologue isone of your most constant
companions.
With some attention andpractice, it can become a
supportive ally instead of aharsh critic. And it doesn't
have to be perfect. It justneeds to be honest, reasonably
kind, and genuinely helpful innavigating the complexities of
(24:35):
being a human. Thanks forlistening to this episode of
PsyberSpace. I'm your host,Leslie Poston, signing off.
Until next time, stay curious,and maybe even listen a little
more closely to the voice inyour head. You might be
surprised by what you hear. Anddon't forget to subscribe so you
never miss an episode, and sendit to a friend that you think
might enjoy it as well.
Welcome back to PsyberSpace. I'm your host,
Leslie Poston. Today, we'reasking, if your brain had
subtitles, would you beembarrassed or impressed? Most
of us live with a voice in ourhead. Sometimes it cheers us on,
and sometimes it narrateseverything we do.
Sometimes it's a little too meanfor comfort. And right now, even
(00:36):
as you're listening to this,there might be another
conversation happening entirelyin your mind. Maybe you're
thinking about what do you needto do later, or you're already
forming opinions about whatwe're talking about today. That
voice is your inner monologue.It's one of the most private and
powerful parts of yourpsychological world.
(00:57):
It helps you plan, reflect,regulate your emotions, and
rehearse your life. But it canalso trap you, bully you, or
talk you out of things you careabout. This episode is about the
secret life of that voice, howit forms, how it varies across
people and cultures, and how youmake peace with it or even make
(01:17):
it work for you. Because here'sthe thing, that voice isn't just
commentary on your life, It'sactively shaping who you become.
Your inner monologue is with youalmost constantly.
Right now, while you'relistening to me, a part of your
brain might be having a parallelconversation. You're not just
(01:40):
passively receiving information.You're responding to it,
questioning it, connecting it toyour own experiences. This is
what makes human cognition soremarkably sophisticated. We
don't just think.
We think about thinking. We talkourselves through tasks, imagine
conversations that haven'thappened yet, and replay ones
(02:02):
that have. We give ourselvesinstructions. Don't forget to
pick up milk. We offerencouragement.
You can handle thispresentation. We provide harsh
critiques. Why did you say that?Some people think primarily in
words with a constant stream ofverbal commentary running
(02:22):
through their mind. Others thinkmore in pictures, sounds, or
physical sensations.
But most of us have some form ofinternal speech even if we're
not always aware of it. What'sfascinating is how unconscious
this process usually is. Yourinner voice feels like the
background noise of being alive.It's so constant that you might
(02:46):
not notice it's there. It's likethe of an air conditioner.
You only become aware of it whenit stops. But this seemingly
automatic chatter plays aprofound role in how you make
decisions, regulate emotions,solve problems, and form your
sense of self. Think about thelast time you had to make a
(03:06):
difficult decision. Chances areyou didn't just weigh the option
silently. You probably hadentire conversations with
yourself.
If I take this job, I'll makemore money, but the commute will
be terrible. And what if I hateit, but then again, staying here
means this internal dialogueisn't just reflecting your
(03:28):
thought process. It's actuallyorganizing your thoughts. It
helps you work throughcomplexity in a way that pure
intuition or emotion alone justcan't manage. As psychologists,
we define inner speech as thesilent internal use of language
to think and self regulate.
(03:51):
It's not the same as hearingvoices or auditory
hallucinations. This is your ownvoice generated by your own mind
talking to you in a process youcontrol even when it doesn't
always feel that way. But howdoes this extraordinary ability
develop? We're not born with aninner monologue. Babies don't
(04:12):
have little voices in theirheads giving them running
commentary of their whole day.
This capacity emerges through adevelopmental process that
transforms social interactioninto private thought. The
developmental pathway goessomething like this. Young
children talk out loudconstantly. They narrate their
(04:33):
play, giving themselvesinstructions, and working
through problems verbally outloud. Now I'm putting the red
block on top.
No. That doesn't work. I'll trythe blue one. If you've seen any
of the little kids skiing videoson TikTok and you've heard
parents put a mic in their kid'shelmet, you can hear these cute,
(04:53):
adorable three and four year oldchildren narrating their way
down the entire mountain whilethey ski. This isn't just cute
kid behavior.
It's cognitive scaffolding inaction. They're using language
as a tool to organize theirthinking and to guide their
behavior. As children develop,this external speech gradually
(05:14):
moves inward. First, they mightwhisper to themselves, then they
mouth their words silently.Finally, speech becomes fully
internal.
But here's a crucial part. Thefunction remains the same. That
inner voice is still serving asa cognitive tool, helping to
organize thought, maintainattention, and regulate
(05:37):
behavior. It's just moved fromthe outside world into the
private realm of consciousness.This process shows us something
profound about the nature ofhuman thinking.
We don't just use language tocommunicate with others. We use
it to communicate withourselves. We've essentially
internalized the social processof conversation and turned it
(05:59):
into a tool for individualcognition. Inner speech isn't
just a reflection of thought.It's actively shaping how we
think.
When you talk through a probleminternally, you're not just
describing your thought process.You're structuring it. The
linear sequential nature oflanguage is forcing you to
(06:20):
organize your ideas in real timeone after another. This can help
clarify confusing situations,work through logical sequences,
and hold multiple pieces ofinformation in working memory
simultaneously. But inner speechserves many functions beyond
problem solving.
(06:40):
It's how we rehearse for futureevents, process past
experiences, and regulate ouremotional responses. It's the
mechanism by which we giveourselves instructions,
encouragement, or criticism.It's also how we simulate social
interactions, imagining whatothers might think or say in
(07:00):
various situations. Here's wherethings get really interesting.
Not everyone experiences theinner monologue the same way.
This might come as a shock ifyou're someone with a constant
stream of verbal thought, butsome people have very little
internal dialogue. Others havenone at all. Research using
(07:23):
sophisticated sampling methodshas revealed enormous variation
in how people experience theirown minds. Some individuals
report rich constant internalnarratives like having a radio
talk show running in their headall day. Others experience inner
speech only occasionally whenworking through specific
(07:44):
problems or in particularsituations.
Still others report that theirthinking happens through images,
sensations, or abstract conceptswithout much verbal content at
all. This variation isn't justacademic curiosity. It has real
implications for how peoplenavigate the world. Someone
(08:04):
without much inner speech mightprocess information more
holistically or intuitively.They might be less likely to
second guess themselves or getcaught in loops of rumination.
On the flip side, they might notbenefit from the organizing and
regulatory functions that innerspeech can provide. Cultural
differences add another layer ofcomplexity. Different cultures
(08:27):
have varying attitudes towardintrospection and self
reflection. Some traditionsencourage detailed internal
dialogue as a path to wisdom andself understanding. Others view
excessive self focus aspotentially harmful, emphasizing
present moment awareness orcommunity oriented thinking
instead.
(08:48):
Language structure itselfinfluences inner speech
patterns. If you grew upbilingual or multilingual, you
might find that your innermonologue switches between
languages depending on context,emotion, or the type of thinking
you're doing. Some people reportthat different languages access
different aspects of theirpersonality or different types
(09:10):
of memories. These neurologicaland cultural variations remind
us of something critical. Theway you think internally is not
a moral trait or a sign ofintelligence.
It's simply one of manycognitive styles shaped by
biology, development, andculture. There's no right way to
have an inner voice or to nothave one. For people with ADHD
(09:35):
or anxiety disorders, innermonologues can feel less like a
helpful companion and more likea chaotic committee meeting
where everyone's talking atonce. Thoughts ricochet from
topic to topic. Tasks arestarted, narrated, interrupted
by other thoughts, abandoned,restarted with different
commentary, and then droppedagain for something entirely
(09:58):
new.
If you have ADHD, your innervoice might not provide the same
organizational support that itdoes for neurotypical brains. A
guide helping you through tasks.It might jump around and get
distracted by interestingtangents or simply fail to kick
in when you need it the most.You might find yourself needing
(10:18):
to talk out loud to organizecomplex tasks, essentially using
external speech because yourinternal speech is not providing
adequate cognitive scaffolding.This is not a character flaw or
a sign of laziness.
It's a brain doing its best tomanage challenges with working
memory, attention regulation,and impulse control. The ADHD
(10:41):
brain is just wired differently,and sometimes that means the
usual cognitive tools, they workdifferently too. For people with
anxiety and some traumasurvivors, inner speech can
become dominated by worry,catastrophic thinking, or
hypervigilance. The inner voicemight consistently scan for
potential threats, replayembarrassing moments, or
(11:02):
generate endless what ifscenarios. What if I said that
wrong thing in that meeting?
What if my boss thinks I'mincompetent? Or what if I get
fired? Then what if I can't findanother job? This anxious inner
dialogue isn't choosing to beunhelpful. It's actually trying
to protect you.
The anxiety system is designedto help you prepare for and
(11:24):
avoid danger. The problem isthat in our modern world,
anxiety often goes intooverdrive, treating social
embarrassment or work stress asif they were life threatening
emergencies. Understanding thesepatterns is the first step
toward working with them ratherthan against them. For ADHD
brains, this might meanaccepting that you need external
(11:46):
supports. Writing things down,talking through problems out
loud, using apps or systems toprovide the organization that
inner speech might not supplyconsistently, or whatever method
works for you because as ADHDpeople will tell you, just
telling them to get a planner isnot the answer.
For anxious minds, it oftenmeans learning to recognize when
(12:08):
your inner voice has shiftedfrom helpful problem solving to
unproductive spinning. The goalisn't to eliminate the voice
entirely. Anxiety often containsuseful information about things
that need attention. It's aboutlearning to work with it more
skillfully. We've establishedthat we all talk to ourselves,
(12:29):
but what exactly are we saying,and does it matter?
Sports psychology has given usfascinating insights into how
inner speech influencesperformance. Athletes who use
positive instructional self talkconsistently outperform those
who don't. Keep your eye on theball. You've got this. Stay
relaxed through your shoulders.
(12:50):
Simple phrases like this do morethan just remind you of
technique. They actuallyactivate motivation centers in
your brain and help maintainfocus under pressure. But the
benefits extend far beyondathletics. The way you talk to
yourself influences everythingfrom your ability to persist
through difficult tasks to howquickly you recover from
(13:12):
setbacks. Encouraging self talkdoesn't just feel better.
It actually changes yourphysiological response to stress
and challenge. Unfortunately,for many of us, inner monologue
is anything but encouraging. Theinner voice can become a harsh
critic, constantly pointing outflaws, questioning decisions,
(13:32):
and predicting failure. Like,you always mess this up.
Everyone can see that you don'tknow what you're doing.
And why did you even try? Thiscritical inner voice often
develops for understandablereasons. Maybe you had parents
or teachers who were highlycritical of you. Maybe you
learned that being hard onyourself was a way to motivate
(13:53):
improvement or avoiddisappointing others. Maybe
criticism became a way to try tocontrol outcomes in an
unpredictable world.
But here's what research buthere's what research shows us.
Harsh self criticism is actuallycounterproductive from most
goals. It increases stresshormones, reduces cognitive
(14:15):
flexibility, and makes you morelikely to give up when faced
with difficulties. People whoare kind to themselves and their
inner dialogue show greaterresilience, more creativity in
problem solving, and better longterm performance across various
domains. The tone of your voicealso influences your sense of
(14:36):
identity.
When the internal commentary isconsistently negative, people
begin to believe that criticalnarrative represents truth
rather than habit. They start tosee themselves through the lens
of their harshest internalcritic, forgetting that this
voice is just one perspectiveamong many possible ones. This
(14:57):
is where the concept of selfcompassion becomes important.
Self compassion isn't aboutlowering standards or making
excuses. It's about changing theemotional tone of how you relate
to your own struggles andimperfections.
Instead of I'm such an idiot formaking that mistake, self
compassionate inner speech mightsay, well, that was
(15:18):
disappointing, but everyonemakes mistakes. So what can I
learn from this? One of the mostsophisticated functions of inner
speech is its role in socialsimulation. Your inner voice
doesn't just help you thinkabout tasks and problems. It
helps you navigate complexsocial world by allowing you to
(15:40):
imagine and rehearseinteractions before they happen.
Think about the last time youhad to have a difficult
conversation. Chances are youprobably ran through various
versions of it in your mindfirst. You might have imagined
what the other person would say,rehearsed your responses, and
even prepared for differentpossible outcomes. If they get
(16:00):
defensive, I'll say this. Ifthey seem negative, I'll say
that.
And if they seem receptive, Ican bring up this other issue as
well. This social rehearsalisn't just worry or
overthinking. It's asophisticated cognitive ability
that allows you to engage inperspective taking, empathy, and
strategic planning all at once.When you imagine how someone
(16:23):
might respond to your words,you're activating the same
neural networks involved inactual social interaction.
You're essentially runningsocial simulation to test
different approaches beforecommitting to an action.
Your inner voice also helps youprocess social experiences after
they happen. You replayconversations, analyze
(16:44):
interactions, and try tounderstand what went well or
what you might do differentlynext time. This post hoc
analysis helps you learn fromsocial experiences and refine
your understanding ofrelationship dynamics. The
social simulation function ofinner speech also connects you
to your sense of identity andbelonging. Much of our internal
(17:06):
dialogue involves imagining whatothers think of us, predicting
their reactions, or rehearsingexplanations for our behavior.
In a sense, we carryinternalized versions of
important people in our lives,and we have conversations with
these imagined others as wenavigate decisions and
challenges. This can beincredibly valuable for
developing empathy and socialskills, but it can also become
(17:30):
problematic when the imaginedvoices become overly critical or
when social simulation turnsinto obsessive rumination. Some
people get trapped in endlessloops of replaying past
conversations or imaginingfuture conflicts, spinning
scenarios that becomeincreasingly divorced from
reality. The key is learning touse the social simulation
(17:53):
function of inner speechskillfully, taking advantage of
its benefits for planning andempathy while recognizing when
it's shifted from helpfulpreparation to unproductive
worry. Sometimes our inner voiceisn't just occasionally
critical.
It becomes genuinely cruel. Forsome people, the internal
(18:15):
monologue sounds like an abusiverelationship happening entirely
within their own mind. The voicemight attack their appearance,
their capabilities, their worthas a person. It might predict
their failure, highlight everyflaw, and dismiss every success
as luck or fraud. This kind ofharsh inner criticism often has
(18:37):
roots in early experiences.
Children naturally internalizethe voices of important
caregivers. If those voices werefrequently critical, shaming, or
rejecting, that criticism canbecome part of their internal
landscape long into adulthood.The harsh parent or teacher
becomes an inner critic thatcontinues their work even when
(19:00):
the original person is no longerpresent. Trauma can also shape
inner speech patterns in complexways. People who've experienced
trauma might develophypervigilant inner voices that
constantly scan for danger,criticism, or signs of
rejection.
The inner monologue becomesdominated by threat detection
rather than supportive guidanceor neutral observation. Cultural
(19:25):
and systemic pressurescontribute as well. If you
belong to a marginalized group,your inner voice might
internalize societal messagesabout your worth or
capabilities. The broaderculture's prejudices can become
part of your internal dialogue,creating additional layers of
self criticism and doubt.Perfectionism often plays a role
(19:47):
as well.
The inner voice becomes focusedon impossible standards,
constantly pointing out howcurrent performance falls short
of some idealized version. Thisperfectionist inner critic often
masquerades as motivation, butit typically creates paralysis,
procrastination, and chronicdissatisfaction instead. When
(20:09):
inner speech becomes dominatedby cruelty and criticism, it
stops serving its adaptedfunction. Instead of helping
with problem solving andemotional regulation, it becomes
a source of additional stressand pain. People might start
avoiding challenges just toescape their own internal
criticism, or they might pushthemselves to exhaustion, trying
(20:31):
to appease an inner voice that'snever satisfied.
Recognizing when your innervoice has become toxic is the
first step toward changing thepattern. Often, people don't
realize how harsh their selftalk has become because it feels
normal to them. It's the onlyvoice they've ever known.
Learning to notice and nameinternal criticism can be the
(20:52):
beginning of developing adifferent relationship with your
mind. The good news about innerspeech is that it is not fixed.
Just as you develop your currentpatterns of self talk over time,
you can develop new ones. Yourbrain's capacity for
neuroplasticity means that theneural pathways underlying inner
(21:14):
speech can change with consciouspractice. The first step is
developing awareness. Startpaying attention to your inner
voice without trying to changeit immediately. Notice when it's
helpful versus when it's harsh.
Observe whether it sounds likeyou or like someone else from
your past. Pay attention to thetone, the content, and the
(21:37):
timing of your internalcommentary. Some people find it
helpful to actually write downwhat their inner voice says,
especially during difficultmoments. Seeing those thoughts
on paper can provide perspectiveon whether they're reasonable,
helpful, or unnecessarily cruel.You might be shocked by how
harsh the dialogue becomes whenyou're not consciously
(21:58):
monitoring it.
Another powerful technique islearning to respond to your
inner critic rather than simplyaccepting what it says. You can
literally argue back and say,that's not accurate. I've
succeeded at difficult thingsbefore, or you might try a
gentler approach. I know you'retrying to protect me from
failure, but this level ofcriticism isn't helpful. Some
(22:21):
people benefit from giving theirinner critic a name or a
persona.
This creates psychologicaldistance and reminds you that
the critical voice is just onepart of your mental landscape,
not the whole truth about whoyou are. You might imagine your
critic as a worried parent, adrill sergeant, or even as a
separate character entirely.Once you can see it as a part
(22:45):
rather than the whole, you canchoose when to listen to it and
when to set it aside. Developinga more compassionate inner voice
often requires concerted effort.You might need to actively
cultivate the tone you'd usewith a good friend facing the
same challenges.
What would you say to someoneyou cared about who was
struggling with the sameproblem? How would you encourage
(23:07):
them without dismissing thedifficulty of their situation?
Mindfulness practices can alsohelp by creating space between
you and your inner commentary.Instead of being completely
identified with whatever yourinner voice is saying, you can
learn to observe it with somedetachment. I notice I'm having
very critical thoughts about mypresentation tomorrow.
(23:28):
This observer stance gives youmore this observer stance gives
you more choice about how torespond. Meditation is also good
for this, and you might thinkthat your inner voice is too
constant to meditate, but partof meditation is learning to let
a thought go. So incorporatethat into these techniques as
(23:48):
well. And remember, changinginner speech patterns takes time
and repetition. You areessentially rewiring neural
pathways that may have beenestablished for decades.
Be patient with the process andcelebrate small improvements.
The goal isn't to eliminate allnegative thoughts or criticism.
Some internal feedback isgenuinely useful. The goal is to
(24:11):
make your inner voice morebalanced, more accurate, and
ultimately more helpful inliving the life you want to
live. Your inner monologue isone of your most constant
companions.
With some attention andpractice, it can become a
supportive ally instead of aharsh critic. And it doesn't
have to be perfect. It justneeds to be honest, reasonably
kind, and genuinely helpful innavigating the complexities of
(24:35):
being a human. Thanks forlistening to this episode of
PsyberSpace. I'm your host,Leslie Poston, signing off.
Until next time, stay curious,and maybe even listen a little
more closely to the voice inyour head. You might be
surprised by what you hear. Anddon't forget to subscribe so you
never miss an episode, and sendit to a friend that you think
might enjoy it as well.
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