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In her book When You Meet Your Match: My Match.com Marriage, Dee Dee Patterson shares what she’s learned from ten years of marriage after meeting her husband online. Prior to that online meeting, however, Dee Dee explains that she was actually in a relationship with someone else — someone she was planning to marry. But though Dee Dee loved the idea of getting married, she realized that she was settling for less than God’s best.
“I was in my late 20s and I wasn’t married yet, and so I was excited about the idea that someone wanted to marry me,” she explains. “But deep down inside, I felt like he did not have the qualities that I always dreamed of when I pictured my future husband.”
Trusting that God had a different plan, Dee Dee broke things off and spent some time enjoying being single. That was when she saw an advertisement for an online dating site. Although Dee Dee didn’t believe in online dating at the time, she decided to give it a try. But this time, she wasn’t going to settle.
“I did a search for my perfect guy,” she recalls. “And it was almost just to prove that it wouldn’t work.” To her surprise, however, one man on the site met all of her “perfect guy” criteria. At first, Dee Dee hesitated, not wanting to make the first move, but finally she reached out — and the rest is history.
Now, Dee Dee says she’s thankful she didn’t settle for someone who wasn’t exactly right for her. If she hadn’t listened to God’s prompting, she wouldn’t be in the amazing marriage she has today.
Dee Dee says she always wanted to share her story. But after writing an outline for the book that is now My Match.com Marriage, she put it aside for several years. Then Covid-19 hit, and Dee Dee found herself at home, out of work for four months.
Wanting to use the time for something productive, Dee Dee pulled out her outline, made a few changes, and started writing. When she was finished, she found an editor, who helped her improve the content and provided instructions for selling the book on Amazon.
“I was surprised at how easy it was,” Dee Dee says. “Because when you think of [writing and publishing a book], it's such a big task. But it didn't seem complicated once I did it.”
One reason the writing flowed so easily for Dee Dee was because she had that outline to work from. Pulling from her journalism background, she had chosen ten main points to write about, and structured the book so that each chapter focused on one of those points.
Not only does this kind of outline make the writing process easier (and often faster), but it also helps keep the book’s content organized so readers can navigate it easily and find the information they need.
Finally, Dee Dee made sure to get reliable feedback. In addition to hiring an editor and getting her husband’s perspective on the personal stories she was writing about, she also asked a trusted family member to read it and give constructive criticism. Dee Dee knew this person would be honest with her even if the book was terrible, which made their positive response even more encouraging.
Maybe you, like Dee Dee, have a story to share, but you’re hesitating to take that first step and get it out into the world. If that’s you, Dee Dee cautions you to remember that “life is short, and you might as well chase your dream
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