The Sister Circle Talk: Setting Boundaries, Breaking Up & Healing in Friendships

Friendship breakups can be just as painful as romantic ones. Have you ever had to walk away from a friend? In this episode, we dive deep into the emotions, challenges, and lessons that come with ending a friendship. From setting boundaries to recognizing when a friendship no longer serves you, we share personal stories and expert insights on navigating friendship breakups with grace.

💬 What’s your experience with friendship breakups? Drop a comment below!

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#FriendshipBreakup #ToxicFriendships #pureintentionspodcast #SettingBoundaries #PureIntentionsPodcast #FriendshipGoals #EmotionalGrowth #SaturnReturn #FriendshipAdvice #PersonalGrowth #TheSisterCircle

Episode Transcript

Chrissy A. (00:00):
Let's talk about the friendship breakup.
Like mourning a friend is a lot.
I recently went throughfriendship breakups.
I lost a friend because of thispodcast, but the podcast had
nothing to do with her.
It's like a certain topic wewere talking about hit home and

(00:22):
she thought that we werespecifically talking about her.
Welcome to the Pure IntentionsPodcast, where real love, raw
emotions and intentionalrelationships come together.
Welcome back to the PureIntentions Podcast, where we
talk everything relationshipfrom an intentional point of
view.
I am your host, chrissy A, andtoday we don't have Sir Anthony

(00:43):
with us, but, however, we have alot of beautiful women here.
So we're going to talk aboutfriendship today.
We're going to start from thisend and everybody, just you know
, slowly, take a time andintroduce yourselves.

Taylor Iman (01:01):
Let's start here.
Oh, we're doing the mic thing.
Hey, I'm Taylor Iman.
Yeah, I'm a singer, actress,all those things.
So make sure you subscribe tomy YouTube channel, miss Taylor
Iman, taylor Iman.
Thanks Bye.

Erica (01:17):
Y'all know her.
That's E.
I am Erica.
I go by Lady E.
You can follow me on InstagramAt lady.
Underscore E underscore 312.

Jasmine (01:31):
My name is Jasmine.
I am a dancer, educator andvisual artist.
You can find me on Instagram atthe Jasmine Danielle.
That's T-H-E-E Jasmine, likethe flower Danielle.
Well, she stated T-H-E-EJasmine.

Christina (01:46):
Like the Flower, danielle.
Who would you ask for this?
Like the Flower?
Well, she stated I am Christina.
I'm just a mom and a dancerwhere I met all these beautiful
young ladies, and you don't haveto follow me, but my handle is
BrownSugarBaby S-U-G-A, babyB-A-B-I-E.
You know, on Instagram, youknow, I'm just living life.

Jazmine (02:07):
Period.
Hi, I am the other Jasmine.
I am a mom, a Afro-historophileand a educator, and I don't
have a handle because I can't behandled.

Chrissy A. (02:20):
So oh, clock it, clock.
It can't be handled.
So hi, I am Deja Nara.
Peoples, most people call meDeja.

Erica (02:42):
I am an educator, I'm a mom and I'm just here for a good
time, you know, with my girls.

Jasmine (02:46):
Yo, yo, yo.

Erica (02:46):
No, I'm kidding um, I am elena aka lele um, and I am a
dancer slash entrepreneur.
You can follow me definitely onall platforms.
At that's hawkins.
That's with a z period okay soOkay.

Chrissy A. (03:05):
So, like I said, you guys, we are going to talk
friendships today.
It might lean intorelationships because this deck
gets you into points where, okay, we're just going to get into
it to it.
So, like I said, we have thesister circle um card deck that

(03:26):
we brought out probably.
We introduced this two podcastsago, three maybe, um with Elena
and E, so now we have moreladies that we can talk about
this with and I'm so excited.
Um, she's going to randomlypull.

Christina (03:48):
Does anyone want to pull first?
Okay, sure.

Chrissy A. (03:56):
Okay.
It says how do you deal with afriend that feels negatively
about your partner?
Do you address it or do you letit slide?
Um, I answer okay, baby, Iain't letting this slide.

(04:16):
Sis, I'm sorry.
I'm gonna respect therelationship but as somebody who
loves you and who's in yourcorner, if I have an issue with
your partner, I'm gonna tell youwhy.
I'm not gonna treat yourpartner different.
I'm not gonna be disrespectfulto them.
But if I see or I noticeanything that kind of rubs me
the wrong way, especially ifI've been around you for a

(04:38):
significant amount of time and Ifeel like I know you and this
is it's safe for me to give myopinion I'm gonna do that for
show.
But even if you are notreceptive of whatever I have to
say again, no judgment, rightI'm still going to be there to
support you through the ups anddowns of that relationship and
I'm always going to treat yourpartner with respect.

(04:59):
But I'm definitely going to letyou know.
I'm definitely going to let youknow.
So what if it's like the otherway around and a friend comes to
you and say, hey, I reallydon't like the man that you're
with because of X, y and Z andhe did X, y and Z.
How would you take that?
I'm going to take it intoconsideration because, at the

(05:20):
end of the day, anybody that Ihave around me me, I know loves
me and cares about me right, andI'm big on energy, so I can
feel if you're being genuine ornot, or if you just probably got
your own issues and you'reprojecting.
So, at the end of the day, I'mgonna take it into consideration
because I know you love me andso at the end of the day, I'm
just like, okay, maybe there'ssome some reflecting that I need

(05:41):
to do, maybe I do need need to,maybe, you know, keep an eye
out for this or that, but at thesame time, I'm still going to
make my own decisions.
I'm a Taurus, I'm bullheaded,so you know I ain't gonna let
nobody talk to me about myrelationship and go home to they
man.

Jasmine (05:56):
You say my man, my man my man.

Chrissy A. (05:58):
But I'm going to take it into consideration for
sure.
Consideration for sure does itdepend on the friend that's
telling you this?
Um, yes, very much so.
If she's married, if she ain'tgot no man, I definitely ain't
listening to her.
You know no, but you know what.

(06:24):
It also depends on the natureof the advice.
Right, if we're talking, itjust depends on the nature.
If it's something that she'sexperienced, that I know she's
actually walked and been through, of course I'm going to take
that into consideration.
But if we're talking about,maybe, some future endeavors and
I know this is probablysomething that she hasn't yet
touched on I might be like I'mgoing to let her speak her piece

(06:45):
, but I'm going to be like, okay, I'll see when I cross that
path on my own.
You know when I cross thatbridge on my own.
So it just depends on thenature of the situation.
I feel like, when it comes tofriends and advice, we got to
have our own strong discernmentBecause, again, like I told you,
people will try to talk you outyour relationship and then go
home to their men or do the samethings that, or are doing the

(07:05):
same things that you're doing,but just won't speak on it, you
know, or, and then sometimes itcan come from a genuine place
because they, even thoughthey're going through it too,
they want better for you.
So we just got to be able to,you know, kind of weed out
what's what, what to adhere toand what to kind of like be like
.
Nah, I'm gonna just thank youfor that.
But no, thank you.
Period, did you?

(07:28):
You want to say something?
She said it oh, it's done.
At first she was like now shelike it's done.
Anybody else had to.
No, okay, period, period, youate, you ate.

Christina (07:44):
Who want to go next?

Jazmine (07:46):
If you looked over here , I guess we could eat it all
Period.

Christina (07:51):
Ooh, yankers, if a friend starts bringing toxic
energy or bad habits around you,how do you protect your peace?
This is so beautiful.
I guess you gotta um.
You gotta filter where they'recoming from.

(08:11):
Filter where they're comingfrom.
Um, it's not even so muchthey're bringing something to
you, it's just it's them.
It's them whatever they'regoing through.
If you're a person that doabsorb energy, you could feel it
and I am like that.
I can get sad.
When I'm not sad because it'ssomebody that's bringing
whatever.
So if it's a toxic thing orwhatever, sometimes it's you.
They're not your friend.

(08:31):
Essentially it could be a hate.
It's something you're doingthat they People tend to project
as humans.
You see something in somebodyand you don't know that you hate
them, but you want to have thelifestyle that you see, and a
lot of times that's where peoplecall it like um girl or women,
mess.
But it's like you.
It's inner hate.
It's inner hate.
You see something like well, Ican't have her life or her

(08:54):
happiness, why I can't look likeher, why I don't look like that
in them pants.
So you are diminishing yourself, you.
You lost yourself love and youwill get lost in a lot of people
like that and it ain't justfriends, it's family that does
that to you Sometimes siblings,somebody that's supposed to have
your back, and it hurts butthere's nothing you can do about

(09:15):
it.
You have to allow them to findthey self, and trying to fix
somebody like that will drainyou, hurt you.
You don't recover from it.
In a way, it's just you got tolet them be down, let them cross
certain bridges by themselves.
It's hard to tell somebody thatneeds to go through certain
phases.
It's like you remember what itwas like growing up Can nobody

(09:35):
tell you about your badboyfriend.
He ain't good for you, girl,you hating on me and then you
looking back 20 years later likehe wasn't no good for me.
I missed all the red flags, butwe can't talk each other
through that.
So somebody bad energy is justa phase they're going through.
It's hate, but we don't want tocall it that because of who
they are in our life.
But sometimes you just got tocut people loose.

(09:56):
Love them from a distance, yeah.

Chrissy A. (09:59):
So okay, so it's saying that if a friend brings
toxic energy, is there a pointwhere you might you may think
that that friend is bringingthat toxic energy because of
something that they might begoing through and they're like
trying to, like they probablysee signs in whatever you're

(10:21):
going through and say, hey, thisreminds me of something that I
go through.
How do you, how do you use yourlike she said discernment in
that regard like so it's youcould be open to.

Christina (10:37):
I guess you want to call it interpretation, but
people got to know when they canjust talk, and sometimes I
might just want to talk and vent, and if that's something you
need, just talk and vent.
But don't come and call out mysituation, because what you see
is just your perspective.
It's not even my real situation.
Or you might have seen one badthing because you have been
waiting on my situation to fallon the ground from the beginning

(11:00):
.
So you just looking, pickingpoking, you're not even there
for me.
So you bring your bad energybecause you just looking,
picking poking, you're not eventhere for me.
So you look, you bring your badenergy because you just don't
want me to be successful in whatI'm doing.

Erica (11:08):
Yeah, okay I think it depends just just for the I
think it depends on what exactlythe negative energy is like and
also who is the person.
If I don't traditionally knowthem to have negative energy,
then I'm gonna be like what'sgoing on?
You know, I'm gonna try tofigure out what's happening, you

(11:30):
know.
But for me, if, especially ifI'm just getting introduced to
you, you got about maybe threegood times for you to have
negative energy unexplainably,for me to be like, okay, let me
pull away.
You know what I mean.
But if you're my friend and Iknow you and you're like a part
of me, like I be attached to thepeople that I love, so it's

(11:54):
like if I know that you'resuddenly having bad energy, I'm
going to eventually be like you.
Good, you sure you know what Imean, because I just think
that's important.
Now, if somebody is more so towhat you were saying, like
they're kind of putting you downand what you got going on, um,

(12:14):
I think it's actually same sameanswer, because this is like if
I, if I know you and I reallymess with you, it's like why are
you putting this down?
What?
What do you see that I don'tsee?
And if you just a damn hater,and then and I'm just getting to
know you.

Christina (12:27):
I'm gonna be like, yeah, no, because I, I just I
can't yeah, separating yourrelationships like that do me a
favor, read the question onemore time if a friend starts
bringing toxic into your badhabits around you, how do you
protect your peace bad?

Chrissy A. (12:41):
habits.
So I kind of want to piggybackoff of what christina said.
I actually I'm gonna take apage out of chrissy and sir
anthony's book and be completelytransparent in this moment,
right, because I have a friend.
I'm actually going through thisright now and I'm actually in a

(13:04):
healing place in my life.
Right, I'm going through a lotof transition and, um, in this
moment there's somebody that isvery close to me, right, and
it's a difficult time for meright now, but it's also a
healing time.
So I'm in a positive place,right, even though I'm

(13:24):
experiencing so much right, butultimately, I just feel like the
energy that she brings is verynegative all the time and it's
not like towards me.
It's things that are going onin her life, but sometimes that
unloading on me while I'm in,while I'm trying to heal, right,
while I'm on a path, a healingjourney, right, and if I get

(13:46):
that call and it's like a bunchof unload, my chest gets tight,
right, I get anxiety and I'mlike I'm not there, like I can't
carry this with you, but it'slike I don't want to be selfish,
because I love you.
You know what I'm saying andI'm grateful that you're on that

(14:09):
.
You're a part of my life duringone of the most important times
in my life, right.
Um, while I'm prioritizing mymental health, I'm prioritizing
my finances, I'm I'm justrearranging everything in my
life and you're a part of that,but it's like there's so much
negative things that are goingon in your life right now and
it's like I can't carry that.
So I feel like it's it's asituation where you have to set
boundaries and you have to beokay to have difficult

(14:30):
conversations with your friends,and I feel like a lot of times
we don't want people to think,oh, I don't give a fuck about
what you're going through orwhat you got going on, so I'm
dismissing you.
But it's more so like I can'ttake that right now, like I love
you, but my energy and whereI'm at in my life I can't carry
that with you and that's justwhere I'm at in my life.

(14:51):
I can't carry that with you andthat's just where I'm at.
And it's not that I'm not herefor you, because I am, but that
unloading is too much for me.
So I feel like it's okay to setboundaries, right, and then, in
addition to that, with the badhabits, you just have to set
boundaries.
If you know I don't do certainstuff.
Don't do it around me.

(15:12):
That goes to show how much youlove me and respect me, no
matter what you do, right, justbe respectful of what I don't do
.

Erica (15:21):
What does setting boundaries look like?
Clear communication.
There we go.

Chrissy A. (15:26):
Clear communication.
Hey, this is a problem for me,right, being okay, like I said,
to have those difficultconversations with your friends,
because we okay sometimeshaving those difficult
conversations with our men,right?

Taylor Iman (15:37):
But with our friend .

Chrissy A. (15:38):
We'll go pillow talk with our man like this bitch
getting on my motherfuckingnerves.
I can't stand her.
She always calling me with thatbullshit, talking about that
nigga, but at the same time I'mgoing to tell that bitch too,
and as you should, becausethat's the you know.
So, at the end of the day, it'sjust being clear communication

(15:59):
and setting those boundaries,like man, stop talking to me
about him.
Um, what did I tell her?
I haven't told her anything yet.
You haven't set them boundaries.
And so I asked you that becauseI've been on the opposite end
of that spectrum.

Christina (16:09):
You haven't set some boundaries.
Clock it, clock it.
That's our intention.

Erica (16:11):
And so I ask you that because I've been on the
opposite end of that spectrum,right where I feel like had a
friend set boundaries,communicated, effectively
communicated instead of wentabout it in a different way,
where you completely silenced me, in a way that I was just kind
of like you are like the longestfriend that I've known my

(16:34):
entire life.
I can respect if you're goingthrough something, but what I
can't respect is you ghosting mebecause you're going through
something In your mind.
Everything that you said soundsperfectly fine to me.
I'm all about communication andtransparency, all that good
stuff.
So I just encourage you to havethat conversation.
I know it's a difficultconversation, but if that person

(16:55):
really means something to you,I think it's super important
because from my experience, itkind of tainted my relationship
with this person because thatconversation wasn't had.
Now we're cordial now, we'recool now, but it's still, if I
reflect on it, it's still alittle residue there.
I have to heal from that,because who's to say that's not

(17:16):
how you're going to move again?
All it took was youcommunicating and setting those
boundaries.

Chrissy A. (17:21):
But sometimes I know you say all it took was
communication.
Sometimes people don't know howto communicate.

Erica (17:27):
Exactly.

Chrissy A. (17:28):
And sometimes people are afraid of being, because
that's a sense of vulnerability,to say there's something here
that's not sitting well with meand to be able to tell you that,
and sometimes it's scary towhere it's like I don't know how
you're going to respond to it,but no disrespect.

Erica (17:49):
We're talking about sisterhood, we're about
friendship, yeah, but you got.
Relationship should meansomething, to the point where
you should know that you cancommunicate with me, even if you
said a little something like Ijust need space and.

Chrissy A. (18:06):
I would say like wait, taylor, because you ain't
got no mic.

Taylor Iman (18:09):
I'm sorry, um, I would say, like you can't
necessarily judge someone else'swound without having the
courage to to, uh, stare yoursin the face.
So I don't feel like that's anexcuse of like, oh, I don't feel
brave enough to communicate.
If you're going through yourhealing journey journal about it
, like, talk to God about it,whatever it is you need to do,
but don't judge someone for thespace that they're in, because I

(18:32):
remember when I would I've beenon both of those ends, but I
remember when I was at a pointwhere I didn't even know I was
complaining all the time, I waspushing, I was fighting to get
out of this, like depressivesadness, and this was my way of
like okay, I'm trying to tellyou that I'm not okay, but I
don't know how to say it, so I'mgonna just keep telling you

(18:54):
about all the stuff that's goingon, um, and then eventually,
once I finally got out of it nowthis person has resented me and
, like, held it in and nevertold me that this bothered me.
And now they're in some heatedargument when, wow, I felt
comfortable enough to to tellyou that I wasn't OK, but all
you heard was man, you thinkeverything is about you and it

(19:17):
was like nope, I'm really tryingto tell you that I'm always a
strong friend, and right now Ican't be the strong friend, and
it would have been better hadthat person been like hey, let's
, let's get some tools, becauseeverybody wants to talk about
like, oh yeah, I'm on, I'm onthis healing journey, but
oftentimes, let's be real, weheal when wounded, instead of

(19:41):
healing being a continuous toolthat we practice.

Chrissy A. (19:46):
And I do understand that.
So it's not like it's an excuse, it's just that everybody are
in different places in theirlives.
So it's like even showing alittle grace and saying, okay,
this person doesn't understandwhat's going on, let me tell you
, is there something wrong?
Communicate that with me.
Sometimes you have to tellpeople and you have to teach

(20:08):
them, because you never knowwhat somebody's situation and
story is like.
They probably never been taughtto communicate their feelings.
They probably live into in ahousehold where nobody
communicated and that's andthat's what they're used to.
So it's like understanding thatthere is grace there where you

(20:29):
say, okay, you're my friend, ifthere's something bothering, you
, communicate that with me.
And if they don't communicate,from that point then you set
those boundaries and it's justlike okay, well, I try with you,
I'm not mad at you, but I can'tdo this.
So I do want to say I do want tosay that I feel like even a lot

(20:50):
of times, just me personally,even in the situation since we,
you know, know that I'm actuallyexperiencing this right now I
have issues with assertingmyself right In the workplace,
in friendships, in myrelationship relationship,

(21:15):
because sometimes I just I havetrouble finding the right words
right, and I don't want to.
I know how sensitive people canbe and, like you said, people
can get defensive right, and Idon't ever want there to be a
situation where it's like wecan't come back from something
and there's a a wound there thatjust has it takes years to heal
, because I have had friendssince grammar school right, that
I recently cut off in my 20s,people that I mourn right now,

(21:36):
that are still living right,friends right.
So it's like I don't want it toget to that point.
So all of the things that I wastelling you guys, that's what
I'm processing, right, and soI'm preparing myself to have
that conversation.
But it's a scary conversation,you know, for me, because I have
had those boundaries crossingand those conversations have
been had and then we weren'table to come back.

(22:04):
You know what I'm saying?
Because, because sometimes itshows, like you said, people are
at different places in theirlives.
So then for some people it'slike you're not there, I'm here,
and so we just we don't haveanything in common right now,
and then that distance starts tocreate itself.

Taylor Iman (22:14):
Yeah, that's a whole other thing of like.
If you are just not aligned,that's a whole different
conversation.
Like that's a whole other thing.
I wouldn't even put it in thesame predicament, because if
we're not in alignment, then Imean there's then, then we don't
have to, you know, even we candistance ourselves.

(22:35):
But like, if we have decidedlike you are my person not to
get all Grey's Anatomy, but oh,definitely Grey's Anatomy but
you know, if we've decided like,like you know, uh Mayor would
never do that to Christina.

Chrissy A. (22:52):
Oh, but we're not talking about Miss Kierna
Springer.

Taylor Iman (22:54):
Okay, period, I'm there with you.
I'm there with you.
I'm there, okay.
But, molly, can I ask you, areyou in your late 20s?
Yes, 29.
Oh, so this is your Saturnreturn, okay, so that also makes
a lot of sense.
Yeah, that also makes a lot ofsense in the sense of, like, you

(23:16):
are going to go through thatphase of losing friends, because
right now you are in the stageof figuring out not only who you
are, but in your Saturn return,you're basically deciding, like
, is what I'm doing in life,working or not?
Turn you're.
You're basically deciding, likeit is what I'm doing in life,
working or not.
So right now you're at a pointof is the friends that I have
around working?
Because, if we're going to behonest, like you literally are

(23:37):
who you are, surrounded by um,and the quicker you learn that,
the quicker you start to let goof people.
So, if this person is average,do you want to be average girl?

Jasmine (23:47):
rich girl.

Erica (23:49):
Um, I second all of those emotions because, like, like, I
have that same sentiment offeeling, like I don't always
know how to express how I'mfeeling like sometimes I'd
rather just shut down and bedone with the situation as
opposed to being like havingthose difficult or
confrontational moments.
But it does depend on what thatrelationship means, because if I

(24:12):
shut down and I push you away,then that means, to an extent,
I'm okay with losing thatrelationship.
And now that I'm like acquiringfriendships and things that I
feel like really means somethingto me, then it's like okay, no,
now I got a woman up and figureout how to say this or say that
, and I think that's also why Isurround myself with women who

(24:32):
are very upfront and straight tothe point.
Because it's like no, what's upwith you.
We're going to have thisconversation.
And it's like some of us whoare more sensitive and more
soft-spoken need that.
You need a friend.
That's going to be like no, Ilove you.
What's going on?
You know what I mean.
So I think all of those thingsare factors for sure.

Chrissy A. (24:56):
Okay, okay.
You see what these cards do,you guys?
They bring out theconversations because we also
have to date our friends as well.
Like we sometimes takefriendships lightly, like I know
, when I was younger I'd likeyou my friend, you my friend,
real quick, without even knowingthis person.

(25:17):
And then you find out later onin life, you breaking up with
friendships that you had ingrammar school and let's talk
about the friendship breakup.
Like, like, mourning a friend isa lot.
I recently went throughfriendship breakups.

(25:37):
2024 was like a break, break,break everything.
It was a breakup year for me.
And you still have a love.
No, I'm.
No, I don't get me wrong.
I absolutely love my friendsthat I I have now because I feel
like, you know, sometimes youreach different points in your

(26:01):
life and sometimes people don'tmove with you.
It's just like relationships,like sometimes I'm growing and
your growth is different than mygrowth and it's just not
working, you know, and that'sokay, like it's okay, but in the
same sense you're still it'sstill a certain sadness there

(26:23):
because it's like, damn, thiswas my friend since college,
this was my friend since highschool and this is a girl I
thought was gonna be at mywedding.
This is, you know what I mean.
And it's like now I have tounthink about her, but I still

(26:46):
have thoughts about her and itit kind of unthinking okay, it
gets hard because I had thisconversation with y'all and um.
I lost a friend because of thispodcast and um and so in reality

(27:09):
in her it was because of thispodcast, but the podcast had
nothing to do with her.
It's like a certain topic wewere talking about hit home and
she thought that we werespecifically talking about her,
but it was just like no babythis was.
This was recorded way before me.

(27:29):
You had the conversation thatwe had it.
You know what I mean, and itshowed a different side of her
that I've never seen.
Like we were friends sincecollege and never got into an
argument until this came out.
And I'm the type of person withadvice for my friends.
This one I'll be like go prayabout it, like, meditate about

(27:57):
it.
And when you say period, whatGod?
She says that to me all thetime and I go and I take a beat
and I meditate, I pray, and thenI meditate to hear God's word
and he say it's just changingfor you, like it's shifting and
that's okay.
It's okay that there's a shifthappening, but there are moments

(28:18):
where something to pop you knowFacebook be, oh, facebook,
snapchat.
Like remember this, no, niggadelete, I don't want to remember
that Apple as well, apple aswell Apple, google and we did a

(28:39):
TikTok.
And the TikTok popped up in mymemories and it was just like oh
, this was a time where, youknow, we were happy together.
And it's like damn, I ain't gotthat friendship no more.
And you told me you was like oh, it's gonna take you a minute,
I'm, I'm just tough and shit.
I'm like, no, fuck that bitch.

(29:00):
I'm like I'm good, I ain'tthinking about who, what's her
name, you know.
But in reality, like I wasn'tthough.
I wasn't though, because when Isay we never argue, we never
argue.
And for it to be our firstdisagreement over something that

(29:22):
I hadn't done, that I was beingaccused of, it was just like
damn, but I had to take back andbe like this had nothing to do
with me and everything to dowith her situation, and she
needed somebody to take it outon.
And I was the person.
And she was like I'm very hurt,we are no longer friends.

(29:42):
No, no, that's not what shesaid.
She said our season has ended.
Oh, that hits so hard.
I'm like the season has ended.
Oh, that hits so hard.
I'm like the season has ended.
Was this via text.
Huh, was this via text or wasthis?
It was via text?
She called.
She called but we were filminga podcast so I couldn't answer.

(30:03):
But he was like setting up.
So the text message camethrough and I'm like okay, okay,
well, we just had thisconversation.
She's been going through stuffyou know in her relationship, so
maybe I should like look at thetext to make sure she's okay.
And I'm reading a text messageand I got broke up with.
So I'm like pause everythingand I call her like what's going

(30:25):
on?
You know what's going on andshe just went off.
So it's like your mind isalready made up.
You don't want to hear what Ihave to say.
You already made up the storyin your head did you send her
some receipts of shoot date?
I, it didn't matter to herbecause that's not what she, she
didn't care.
Maybe I'm just that petty, okay, no, because I told her.
I told her it's on this day, inthe middle of the, in the

(30:50):
middle of the conversation, Isaid I saw period Cause you know
, when you film off real camerasthey have timestamps, yeah.
So I was like that episode wasthe crazy part about it is I
didn't say a friend of mine, Ididn't say a girl, I know, yeah,
yeah, I just asked the questionof if you, if some, if somebody

(31:15):
was in this situation, whatwould you do?
It was a general and mostcouples go through it, which is
why it was a part of our podcast.
So it's like I just talked toyou about this last week.
So you think that I filmed,edited the same day and then

(31:36):
shot it out there the same day.

Erica (31:38):
There's no, there's no reason to try to understand.
Yeah, yeah, so it wasn't itwasn't even that she wanted to
understand yeah she had alreadymade in her mind because that's
what she needed.

Chrissy A. (31:52):
She needed that deflection to come on me.

Jasmine (31:54):
So her situation how did you work for her?

Chrissy A. (31:58):
um, I'm okay with our season ending, you know, I'm
perfectly okay with that.
Um, I wish you well.
I even sent her a new year's.
I sent all my friends newyear's notes telling them how
they impacted my life throughoutthe year.
And I'm sorry, granted, grantedyou, you are a newer friend, so

(32:29):
that's the only reason why yeah, let's talk about this later,
but I send all my friends, myold friends, new Year's notes,
telling them how they impactedmy year and whatever, and what

(32:50):
I've learned from ourrelationship.
And hers was still a nice noteand it was like I'm this isn't a
note to say that I want ourfriendship back, but I enjoyed
what we had when we had it, andthat was my culture I wanted you
to send her the time stamp, youknow what.

(33:10):
And I started to Like SirAnthony pulled it up.
He like babe, we shot it on, weshot it on this day, we shot it
on that day at this time, andhe gave me the exact thing.
And I'm just like why not let?

Erica (33:25):
her day crack, it didn't matter.

Jasmine (33:28):
Let me tell you why it didn't matter, because?

Erica (33:29):
even before that happened , the same situation happened in
a different way.

Chrissy A. (33:34):
Yeah, so people start looking for reasons to end
Start over yeah.
People start looking forreasons to end situations, and I
noticed that because, literally, it seemed like all of this is
my life.
That's why I listen to y'all.

Erica (33:49):
That's why.

Chrissy A. (33:49):
I listen to Pure Intentions because it's all my
life.
I'm living it.
Y'all not just living it, weall living it.
Take that as a soundbite Forreal, and that's why I love it
so much, because, honestly, I'mon the receiving end of that
right now and I've been on theother end of that right where

(34:15):
I've ended a friendship.
And then let's talk aboutregretting it.
Let's talk about breaking upwith a friend and regretting it.
Talk about it, you know, andabout mourning people and they
still alive, like it's.
It's hard, right, for real,because my I, I I broke up with
my sister from childhood peopleit's people to this day that
still think that we are bloodsisters and we were just best
friends from childhood.
Right, and it's hard.
She live in Nashville,tennessee, so it makes it easier

(34:36):
, but it's hard, it's very hard.
And we broke up because I wasengaged and I was getting
married and I chose another oneof my best friends to be my maid
of honor and not my sister, andshe was mad.
And she was mad and she waslike we had planned this all our
life.
I said, imani, we did not planthis.
You were going to be my matronof honor because you're older,

(34:57):
so you were going to get marriedfirst, but these were like
child plans that we made fromlike six and seven years old six
and, I'm sorry, six and nineyears old and because I didn't
adhere to that when we were inour 20s, it was like it was a
lot.
It was a lot.
It's like it's not ideal for youto be my maid of honor.
You're not in Chicago, you know.
You don't have the capacity tocome up here.

(35:19):
What about when I have to do acake tasting right away and you
can't be here?
Then what?
You can't just get that titlejust because you're my sister?
Yeah, yes, being a maid ofhonor is a job.
I'm like it's a financialsituation.
I'm like it's a lot that comeswith it, and she just didn't
understand that, so that had toend.

(35:40):
And then I regretted that.
I regretted that because I feltlike she took my moment and
made it about her you know whatwhat I'm saying?

Erica (35:47):
So I ended that.
Them the three that you gottalet go.
Yeah, I ended that.

Chrissy A. (35:52):
I ended that because I'm like you can't just be and
you know what's so crazy.
Tia and Tamera they wentthrough the same situation, yep.

Jasmine (35:58):
And that's what it reminded me of.

Chrissy A. (35:59):
I'm like, just be my sister, just be my sister.
So I'm like you don't have tobe my maid of honor, just be my
sister.
That's an important role too.
And even in me literally beingon the receiving end of a
breakup, I literally my bestfriend from college.
You brought the best friendfrom college.

(36:20):
She literally just ghosted me.
I don't know why.
She's the godmother of mychildren.
She was the beneficiary on mylife insurance policy.
She's in the will to get mychildren and she ghosted me.
I just took her off last week.
I just took her off last weekand she's an Aquarius.
Her birthday was a couple ofdays ago.

(36:41):
I knew that was coming out ofher mouth next.
I'm sorry I am a Aquarius,literally she's an Aquarius
hater.
I am a Aquarius hater.
Y'all hate they, so weird.
Not all of them, bro, she's themost beautiful person.

Erica (36:56):
I've ever met.

Chrissy A. (36:57):
I have some pretty close Aquarius friends.

Erica (36:59):
No.

Jasmine (36:59):
Yeah, I'm new card.

Jazmine (37:01):
What am I Wait before we?
We've been talking about this Iwill say before we we skip.

Erica (37:05):
It's a good topic because it resonates with me.
I don't even have to speak andeverything that everybody has
said hits home.
I've experienced it in so manydifferent shapes and forms
college friend, grammar schoolfriend and and being.
And then I feel, like you know,we don't get to choose our
family, but we get to choose ourfriends and even though, like,

(37:28):
yes, okay, I'm a Pisces people,what'd you say earlier I had to
cut my best friend off well,apparently people gravitate
towards the energy you know,we're adaptable, we're all signs
, we're all signs we get along alot of people, um, but these
were individuals where I feltlike I was an amazing friend too
.

(37:48):
And, to you guys' point, all ittook was a conversation, and it
showed me the way you were justgiving your heart out.
I was just pouring it out.
That's what we did and gotghosted.
And in another situation it wasbecause of business.
But we was like, let's not makeit personal, it's just business
.
But it turned into somethingdifferent and, to your point, I

(38:09):
was the godmother of child, maidof honor, all these things.
And so, also to your point, Ithink it was just a transitional
period for me.
They, in order for me to growin certain areas, I had to let
go of those situations or learnhow to let go of those
situations, because it wasreally hard for me, like if you

(38:30):
with me, we stuck, we stuck forlife.
And so when somebody turns adifferent leaf and goes that way
, I just I don't know.
It was always hard for me todeal with.
But now the advice that I gaveyou, I'm like you're going to go
through that.
You're not going to understandit, you're not going to know why
, but it's meant for a reasonlater on in life, is meant for a
reason later on in life.

Jasmine (38:49):
I'm a strong believer in the fact that the universe is
going to provide to youwhatever it is you need when you
need it right, and so itapplies to relationships, and
I'm seeing a lot of connection.
I'm hearing a lot of connectionwith what was brought up
earlier about these difficultconversations that we're not
necessarily comfortable having.
When you regularly practicehaving difficult conversations

(39:12):
with your loved ones, it kind ofseeps into every other area of
your life, including work.
But when we're talking aboutthese friendships right, like
when you regularly practicehaving these difficult
conversations the people thatare going through things and
project onto you and break upwith you without explanation,

(39:33):
usually because they're goingthrough things that they're not
necessarily comfortable sharingor don't know how to share when
you have those conversationsregularly, they can get there
Right.
And I'm not saying that youhave to chase after anybody, you
know I'm not saying that thatyou have to chase after anybody.
I'm not saying that.
But just being in practice ofhaving uncomfortable, difficult
conversations can open up a lotof different doors.

Erica (39:56):
That's the word, that's the advice from this
conversation.

Chrissy A. (39:59):
Okay, so I do want to change the topic a little bit
.
It might stay in the same kindof lane, because these cards are
about friends, but Jazz overhere hasn't said anything, so
let's roll a card.

Jazmine (40:13):
Okay, okay, what Okay?
You and your friend like thesame guy.
You're serious about the guy,but your friend sees him as just

(40:34):
a casual fling.
Do you talk to her about yourfeelings or keep them to
yourself?

Erica (40:44):
Is that your friend Is?

Jasmine (40:46):
that your friend, or is that your?

Jazmine (40:47):
associate this requires a second read.
You and your friend, like thesame guy, time out Keisha and
Ava like the same guy.
Keisha is serious about the guy, but Ava sees him as just a

(41:10):
casual fling.
Do you talk?

Jasmine (41:14):
to your friend.

Jazmine (41:15):
I am Keisha.
Am I talking to Ava about myfeelings or do I keep them to
myself?
You know I'm gonna pivot tosomebody in the audience.

Jasmine (41:27):
No, Keisha, keisha was Keisha, keisha was serious, but
Ava was playing.

Jazmine (41:35):
And Ava was playing.

Erica (41:36):
Keisha really liked it.
If you was Keisha, what wouldyou do?
Jazz, I have a valid question.

Jazmine (41:42):
Yes.

Erica (41:44):
Ava's not here.

Chrissy A. (41:46):
Let Keisha answer first she hasn't said anything
at all.
Okay.

Erica (41:49):
Keisha answer first, because she hasn't said anything
at all for Keisha about Ava.

Taylor Iman (41:55):
Ava has a valid question for Keisha about Ava.
My valid question is is Ava ahoe?

Erica (42:05):
before you answer.
We don't know if she's a hoe wejust know that she's okay.

Chrissy A. (42:11):
So they have, she got whole tennis they have.
They have an interest in thesame guy.
They're attracted to the sameguy.
However, you like the guy andsee potential relationship with
him, why the other girl just seehim as like a nice little fling
, like just something to playwith.
So, like, do you tell him, likelook like I know you just want

(42:31):
to play with him, but you know Ican't.
Like we actually vibe, like Ifeel a real connection here, but
that's the.
That's the question.
Do you say something?

Jazmine (42:40):
well, well, well, keisha does not congregate with
hoes, so Keisha would not, uh,be around those.
But I would say I think I knowmy friends pretty well and I
would hope that they know mepretty well.
So I think that would be a verysimple conversation.
And, you know, I think at theend of the day, if it's a good

(43:02):
friend and it is a friend I careabout, I'm not going to allow
our relationship to falter overa guy.
I just can't see myself arguing,especially if it's a very, very
good friend of mine and if theshoe was on the other foot.
If I'm just casually lookingfor something, I can look
elsewhere.
I think, and I feel like myfriend would have the same

(43:23):
concept.
I can find flings anywhere.
But if you're serious aboutthis particular person, then I'm
gonna be in your corner, I'mgonna be supportive of your
relationship and I'm gonna dowhat needs to be done to make
sure that you all have a healthyrelationship but what if she's
not serious?

Chrissy A. (43:37):
and you are like what if this person, if anybody
see you two together, it justmakes sense, like how y'all vibe
, how like, and you've neverfelt that before.
And she's just like I like,like she's more outspoken.
So she's talking to this guylike and telling you oh, I'm
going, I'm going to do this andthat in a third to him.
I ain't going to take himserious.

Jazmine (43:59):
Well, pre-salvation, I probably would have going a
different route, but postsalvation.
Those are, those are twodifferent.
Yeah, no, I think I think thenwe would have a serious
conversation.
I would have to, we would haveto sit down and really evaluate,
like the, the, the standardsand expectations in our

(44:20):
friendship, because obviouslysome communication got lost
somewhere.
Um, so I think we could.
That's a, that's a sit downconversation, and if that season
has passed for me and thatfriend, then so be it.

Christina (44:30):
Yeah.

Chrissy A. (44:35):
I'm going to just say I am grateful enough.
With almost 30 years on thisearth, me and my friends are not
attracted to the same type ofmen.
Even though the nigga might befat when he open up his mouth,
if he with her, he ain't my typeand that's just what it is.

(44:56):
Wow okay, and I'm grateful forthat, because I don't need that.
I don't need that in my life.
I don't like.
I don't like um creatingcompetition amongst me and my
friends, because women, we canbe just as um aggressive, right,
or even as they.
What do they call men?
Um?
They say that they are hunters.
We have hunter spirits in us aswell.

(45:18):
We have masculine energy thatdwells deep within us, that we
can, that we can make come aliveand and in that energy, when
we're dwelling in those moments,and when we're dwelling in
those moments, you know it'sjust like, yeah, I don't want to
be, I don't want.
No, what's for you is for youand what's for me is for me.

(45:41):
And then, if I was in thatsituation, I think honestly, I
would bow out gracefully becauseI'm not, you're going to be
here before that nigga, you'regoing to be here after that
nigga.
So if you really want thatnigga girl, have that nigga
Possibly.
Well, we just that's true.
That's true.
You said possibly.

Jasmine (46:03):
You said possibly.
I'm sitting around with a guyand I'm like what's he doing?
So?

Christina (46:05):
based on right.
So, based on how the car wasred, it sounds like one of them
wants something serious and theother one is already having the
fling with the guy.
No, no, that's what it soundslike.

Chrissy A. (46:20):
Well, what if it's not that way?
But what if so?
Let's pretend like it's notthat way okay.
And we had a conversation aboutthis nigga.
Like damn, we had a bar andlike he finds it says she sees
him as a casual funny okay.

Jasmine (46:38):
So they can be friends with him.

Chrissy A. (46:39):
Right, he could be in their circle and it's
supposed to be like.

Christina (46:43):
I always wanted a brother so even if y'all in a
general area cafeteria, coffeeshop, bar, whatever you having a

(47:08):
conversation about some guythat y'all see attractive, who
gets to pick, who gets the man?
The man has to, the man has to.
So why is the conversationserious?
Why is the conversationbecoming serious, and your
friendship down there on theline, about a guy that didn't
even pick neither one of y'allyet?
Okay, say that oh, you know.

Erica (47:33):
Um, I think what's dope about these cards in this
conversation is a repetitivetheme is people are saying well,
with my real friends, like whenyou know, I'm saying because
it's like in that conversation.
I think I've been in a similarsituation as this.
And if you like, oh, I'm justplaying around and she's like,
no, I really feel this, that andother, you can be like, oh,

(47:54):
girl, you got it, because I wasjust playing in a real
friendship with real feminineenergy, when they're really
bonded together.
You know what I'm saying?
What's up?

Taylor Iman (48:10):
Or just to kind of wait, or just to kind of
piggyback off of what you'resaying.
You were kind of going thisdirection, but maybe not really.
Or there's a difference betweenyour real friend and somebody
who's just your homegirl.
Yeah, no, for sure it's a wholedifferent kind of energy.

Erica (48:20):
Yeah, so you might not even feel the need to even have
it but I have a very strong lineof that because I'm because of
all of this that we talk aboutright now.
I really don't have a lot ofpeople that I consider a friend,
a real girlfriend, even withrelationships.
I'm the same way with men, likeif I suspect any of this weird

(48:41):
shit is going on, I'm, I keep acertain distance, even if I'm
cool with you.
So if you are my friend, I goabove and beyond to not cross
your boundaries and to alsocommunicate so that we don't
have any issues then you know,me.
Okay, I know you yeah, have Imet you before, do I know?

Chrissy A. (49:01):
no girl like you know I'm saying if we're
specific, know you love me, nogirl like you know what I'm
saying.

Erica (49:08):
If we're specific, and we were me and you, and you were
like, oh no, I really like him.
And I was just like oh girl, Iwas just looking around, go
ahead for sure, elena.

Taylor Iman (49:18):
Elena, I was just talking about this for real.
The question is, what if we?

Erica (49:21):
were both serious about this guy.

Jasmine (49:24):
That's a good question.

Christina (49:26):
OK, look at that point we should just be like you
know what?

Chrissy A. (49:30):
let's just not yes.

Erica (49:32):
That's going to get real sticky.

Taylor Iman (49:33):
Come on OK.
Meanwhile we don't even havethe same type of Lena's style
Chill.

Erica (49:38):
You don't know that, because that real, real tall man
you had one time, you know Ilike him tall.

Christina (49:44):
I know the truth, I always wanted a brother.

Jazmine (49:47):
Say that, say that I always wanted a brother.

Chrissy A. (49:48):
No, no, no, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

Erica (49:53):
I'm literally kidding because I don't know who that
man was.
I hate to sound ridiculous.

Taylor Iman (49:58):
I know Like you have been standing next to
somebody and I was just like doyou not know who that was?
And you were like yeah, I haveno clue.
I'm like Alayna.
That was the one that was theone.

Chrissy A. (50:11):
See, that's what I'm saying.
You were like that one Out often, you and your homegirl don't
or you and your best friendNine times out of ten.
You and your homegirl, you andyour best friend, y'all not

(50:32):
attracted to the same type ofmen.
Like I don't know.
It's like I don't know.
That's why I love being friendswith different women from
different signs and stuff likethat.
Like, honestly, me, being atourist, I don't vibe with
tourist women.
All of us are different.
I just don't.
I don't vibe with tourist women.
I will.
So if you don't like touristwomen, I get that.
I get that because also alsothe upbringing matters as well.
My mom's a Virgo, right, and mydad's a Scorpio, so that that

(50:56):
has a lot to do with you know mycultivation.
But at the same time I will say,like me and my friends, I just
don't see us being attracted tothe same man.
We're so different, our tasteis different.
Even if we both may agree thatthis man is handsome, once he
opens up his mouth, his morals,his values, what he likes to do,
what he doesn't like to do,we're not he going to line with

(51:18):
one of us, he's not going toalign with both of us and so,
like you said, at the end of theday it's about who he picks
also Also it's about who hepicks also.
Also, it's about who he picksbecause you gotta, you gotta be
like, you gotta be like.
Okay, well, he picked her andyou gotta, you gotta suck that
shit up.
You was not.
I'm kind of no, I'm kind ofcurious, because we say that we

(51:42):
don't like the same type of man.
But I'm kind of curious to knowwhat our types are, to even see
if we actually like the sametype of man.
But I'm kind of curious to knowwhat our types are, to even see
if we actually like the sametype of man or not.
Okay, like what's your?
Let's start here.

Erica (51:57):
What's your type?
Let's go Tall, dark andhandsome, okay.
Spiritual creative Okay.
Strong black man Okay.
Spiritual creative Okay.
Strong black man, okay.
No, honestly, I'm going to behonest, I ain't got no type.
Like they say with Swae Lee andthem I ain't got no type.

(52:19):
It's really about theconnection.
Bad bitches this the only thingI like.
You can be as fine as you wantto be.
You can be tall, you can berich.
I really don't care about noneof that stuff.
It's about the connection.
Can I be all types of myselfwith you?
Can I be the goofy me?
Can I be the sexy me?
Can I be the masculine versionof me, the feminine version of

(52:40):
me?
That's really what it's about.

Chrissy A. (52:42):
What if he 5'3"?
Damn.

Erica (52:44):
She's 5.
The Lord said he wouldn't dothat to me Me and the Lord got
two arrangements he will beblack and he will be at least
taller than me.
That's all we got going on.
You're a tall woman?
I am actually.
You guys are all short Clothes.

(53:09):
Look good on you.
I am actually.
You guys are all short.
All of you, all of you, exceptfor me and my girl.

Chrissy A. (53:16):
I don't know, I don't know what my type is.
I would say, out of my historyof men, my type is Gemini and
Scorpio, which are the two worsttypes.
Oh, I hate it for me so bad,for sure, that's scary.
Yeah, it is, it is.

(53:37):
It's very much so scary for me,but it's something about the
way that a Gemini man can spot aTaurus woman out of a crowd of
100,000 women, like it's just,they just, they see us as a mag.
They're predators, yeah, but soare Scorpios.
So are Scorpios, though, and sowith that energy, it's like I

(53:59):
don't know, but that's just what.
That's what I attract.
And so that's why I'm in ahealing.
That's why I'm in a healing.
That's why I'm in a healing.
It's phased in my life rightnow because you know what?
And that's my toxic trait.
My toxic trait is that I liketoxic niggas.

Erica (54:19):
So we definitely ain't fighting the same man.

Chrissy A. (54:22):
We definitely ain't you ain't got nothing to worry
about.
But you know what, at the same,in full transparency, in full
transparency, in fulltransparency, it's not even the
toxicity that draws me to themwith a gemini man it's more so
like a he quiet, he, laid back.
You feel what I'm saying.
So I like that energy.
I want to see like out of allof me, like why are you, why are

(54:43):
you so quiet?
Like what you, what you gotgoing on?
Yeah, what you got going on.
And they and they like, theylike gemini men, like aggressive
women.
So tourist women, we'rebullheaded, we're very
aggressive.
So they, they welcome thatenergy.
A lot of men, they shy awayfrom that.
So that's why I, I, that's whyI fuck with gemini men.
And then scorpio men, they likea challenge, right, and tourist

(55:06):
women we are very sure ofourselves.
But scorpios, they got like amanipulative type of.
So they want to try to see it'sa challenge for them to try to
like get us to, to bend on whatwe think we stand on.
I fuck with.
It's like some mind shit, likeI don't know a scorpio.

Taylor Iman (55:24):
Yeah, I did.

Chrissy A. (55:24):
Yeah, I did say that , I did say that.
And they have strong family.
They have strong family idealstoo.
Scorpio men are very much sofamily-oriented I fucks with
that, I fucks with that.
So it's just their goodqualities, more or less than
their toxic qualities.
I'm being honest, you know, Istill don't understand why you

(55:45):
have a Scorpio on your chest.
My daughter is a Scorpio.
Okay Okay, my son is a Sag Tagcoming soon Another Sag.

Jazmine (55:57):
Crazy.
Okay, I don't know if I have atype to a CEO's point.
I think I look for spirituality, I look for creativeness, I
look for creativity.
Rather, um, you don't have tobe like a bibliophile, but you

(56:18):
need to have read something inthe last year and not just off
your phone.
Um, that'd be ideal.
And, um, you know, kind goodrelationship with your family?
Um says a lot about you.
Know, your ability tocommunicate and hold healthy
relationships.
Um, yeah, those would be likethe top ones.

(56:38):
Now, yeah, that's it, yeah,yeah, I'm gonna leave it at that
for media purposes.

Chrissy A. (56:46):
I guess, Right, I already got her, I got my man.
Y'all already know.

Taylor Iman (56:57):
Oh, he's back there blushing, look at him.

Erica (57:01):
You done passed the microphone.

Chrissy A. (57:03):
Because they know who he is.
We don't know your type If youdon't know time if you don't
know go back.
If you don't know, go back tothe previous episodes and you
will see what my type is whatabout cuz?

Erica (57:19):
we know who your man is, but we don't know what about him
as your type?

Chrissy A. (57:24):
well, everything that, everything that you said.
Basically he's family oriented,we have the same type.
Oh, okay, yeah, this is why Isaid that we always say our
friends don't have our same type, but let's find out if we do.
Literally everything you saidwas describing my man For the

(57:45):
record, jasmine.
For the record you brother.

Erica (57:53):
That's what I'm saying, because we all can say family
oriented, we all want to.

Chrissy A. (57:58):
Yeah, you know, like we just vibe well together.
It's just, it's like a certainspiritual bond that is
unexplainable and it's like fromthe first moment that I saw him
, I can't talk about nobody buthim being my type, because at

(58:20):
first I was just like I don'treally have a type.
But like he is strictly my type, like, yeah, he get on my
nerves, but I love him even whenhe getting on my nerves, like
he's just dope as fuck.
Like y'all got the beard goingon.
I love me a beard with a littlegray in it, you know.

(58:43):
And I got my heels on.
He's taller than me in my heels, you know.
So that works for me.
He has the muscles.
Okay, is the couch all right,you know?
Look, I tried to skip me buty'all wanted to hear it, so.

(59:03):
So I'm going to give it to you.
No, seriously, like you gothrough things in relationships.
For me, my biggest thing wascommunication and we're working
on it.
But he does communicateexceptionally well, more so than

(59:26):
most men I've ever dated.
So, yeah, and he's willing togo through life with me, like
we're now in the couples therapy, you guys.
Yeah, yeah, so so, yeah, mytype is someone who leads and
who also knows how to allow meto lead in moments where I'm

(59:49):
strong at.
So, my man, my man, my man.

Christina (59:55):
So I've been small most of my life.
I was like 90 pounds until Iwas probably going into my 20s
and so, growing up watching mygrandparents, my grandmother did
not have to work, but she wasable to, and so my grandfather
literally did everything fromthe house chores, work five days

(01:00:15):
a week, come home, give thegrandkids their allowance.
So I grew up with that, yeah,the man's supposed to literally
protect, provide and doeverything.
So I looked for that and Ialways liked bigger guys.
It made me like I like a teddybear.
So my baby is he a teddy bear?
I like to get up in there, getmy good spoon on.
But I also like a guy that whenwe talk and conversate I don't

(01:00:39):
always want to have aconversation where it feel like
we have to work on us so much orit feel like we always talking
about somebody else, like if wecould have a conversation about
nothing.
I love you because you find outhow many minutes can't talk.
For five fucking minutes you'dbe like, baby, we don't got
nothing to talk about.
You okay, you cute, but thisain't going nowhere other than

(01:01:02):
to a bed and see you later, baby.
But with my baby we could seesome bs on the commercial or
something.
We'd have a whole 10-minuteskit about it.
We'd have made up a wholenother life or whatever.
Because I don't want to have toalways, because when you talk
about somebody's life I feellike you're judging past a
certain point and everybodywants to be spiritual, religious
and all that.
When you talk too much aboutsomebody's life you are judging

(01:01:23):
it ain life you are judged, itain't for you to fix or talk
about.
If you're gonna fix on yourself, do that.
But I don't want to have tolook at you and talk about your
life.
I don't want to take my lifeinto somebody else uh life and
tell them all my problems.
So we talk about our life, butwe know how to table that and
then we could talk aboutanything else.
So that's why he my bag.

Jasmine (01:01:40):
I love physically, I don't know that I have a type,
but in terms of, like, what youbring to the table, and we're
talking about the table, thetable, um, let's see, must be
service oriented, must beintelligent and educated, um,

(01:02:03):
and preferably like.
I mean, I'm in school for myPhD, you ain't got to be on that
level, but I do want you to beable to have a conversation with
me and I you know like and asJazz said, like I love men who
read 48 laws.

Jazmine (01:02:19):
Of power does not count , and rich dad, poor dad, does
not count no, no, no, but theycan't be your personality.

Chrissy A. (01:02:35):
They cannot be your personality a lot of narcissists
read those books yeah, but verymuch service oriented, very,
very much detail-oriented.

Jasmine (01:02:51):
And I do appreciate open communication, but
sometimes it's nice to know thatsomebody's just paying
attention to the little things.
I love that.
I value that.
Let me see there's somethingelse that I'm missing Romance,
you.
You got to be romantic.
Like we have to go on dates.
Like I like spending qualitytime with you we could be in the

(01:03:12):
house, but I also likeadventure, um, and I have a
fitness background, sopreferably you would like like
to exercise and move your body.

Chrissy A. (01:03:27):
Yes, cuz that body is for the gods.

Jasmine (01:03:47):
But yeah, I'm just a girl when I'm with you.

Erica (01:03:49):
So I'm gonna be about the service you know and be a
protector.
I've been dying to hear this.
I want to hear my coach's titleyes, yes, lady.

Christina (01:04:01):
Keep it simple.
Keep it simple, yes.

Erica (01:04:03):
I plead the fifth.
No, no, I'm kidding, I I'mkidding, I have a mic, um crazy.
But I would echo wait a minute,right no, I think we all had a
moment, like you, like crazy no,no, no crazy moment, because
again the whole top or westarted this conversation to
basically debunk, if we like,the same type of man, right?

(01:04:25):
Yeah, that pause was just alittle too much.
I'm sorry, but we're echoing alot of the same things here.
Um, same thing, physicalquality I have, I would say,
matured.
Um, because you know, I'm ashort girly, about five feet,
and what I used to want wassomeone six feet tall and it's,

(01:04:47):
it's cool, it's cool and all but, um, it doesn't matter to me
anymore.
Um, however, I am athletic anddancer, so I need I'm not gonna
stand up, but, yes, um, physicalphysique is, or just fitness,

(01:05:09):
wellness, fitness is importantto me.
Family oriented I know we'vespoke on before Someone who's
super supportive and grounded,because I am a water sign and I
like to flow like water.
So sometimes I need somebody tobring me back to life in
reality.
Definitely ambitious, someonewho reads, someone who's

(01:05:34):
goal-oriented.
I'm very determined, I'm morelike the executor.
I feel like If you have an idea, I'm going to be the one that
kind of brings it to life.
But I need you to have thatambition too.
Yes, definitely, providerprotector, and you got to be a
little strong-minded a littlebit and also understand how to

(01:05:56):
deal with me, because I can be alittle sassy and feisty and not
take that personally.
You know I need somebody thatcan, yes, handle me and not look
at it like a challenge or or um, they gonna soften that up real

(01:06:17):
good.
You know, I'm saying, yes, berespectful about it because I
could be submissive, but youjust gotta know how to talk to
me, right?
Just ask that you can't tell mewhat to do.

Chrissy A. (01:06:30):
You can tell me what to do.

Erica (01:06:32):
Exactly, and I feel like.
Also, I am a chameleon, so likeI adapt to a lot of different
environments and situations, soyou just got to know that about
me and just move with me, isthat?
It about me and just it movedwith me yeah.

Christina (01:06:55):
You ain't know Nigga trying to get the money for the
rent.

Erica (01:07:02):
You ain't know, man, we can kind of make a gas penny
spend, yeah it be a whole lot ofmoney, a whole lot of bitches
talking shit yeah.
All right, hey guys, how's itgoing, missy Mom.

Taylor Iman (01:07:23):
Actually not.
I know y'all going to be likeboo, but me personally, I don't
say my type on camera, um,because, because, um, I don't
like people pretending to besomething that they're not and
then they change and all of asudden there's somebody

(01:07:46):
completely different, um, andalso like with my following that
I have people have put me inuncomfortable situations, so you
do not have to worry about me,you do not have to worry about
me.

Jasmine (01:08:03):
Well, do you have a physical type?

Chrissy A. (01:08:05):
That people can't change.

Taylor Iman (01:08:07):
That people can't change.
So tell us that, yeah, it'smuscles.

Chrissy A. (01:08:11):
Muscles.
I didn't say my physical type.

Taylor Iman (01:08:15):
I'm going to speak on my physical type Keep going
Muscles.

Erica (01:08:19):
You're not getting off the hook that easily.

Taylor Iman (01:08:21):
One Pisces to another.
Who did not want?

Erica (01:08:23):
to share.
She was already muscles.

Chrissy A. (01:08:27):
Listen y'all.
Well, I want to include y'allmy close friends.

Taylor Iman (01:08:29):
I'm like y'all.
It's been some wild thingsthat's been out there um you're,
you're listen.
Well, yeah, I know, I knowy'all are my close friends.
Hello, hello 16.
Okay, I'm sorry I gotdistracted um you want me to ask
you a question again dark skin,light skin oh, I don't think, I

(01:08:51):
don't think I.
I don't think I have a likecomplexion thing.
I don't think that's not um, Iwould absolutely prefer black
man, okay you know, doeseveryone prefer a black man?

Chrissy A. (01:09:05):
wait, you ain't say nothing.
This is a colors, only you know.
Does everyone prefer a blackman?
Wait, you ain't say nothing.
Okay, now if the Lord sayotherwise you know, sometimes,
sometimes, you get blessed withsomething else, I was engaged to

(01:09:27):
an Arab and he was actuallyArab and Puerto Rican.

Erica (01:09:30):
Engaged.

Chrissy A. (01:09:30):
I was engaged to him .
He was a Pisces, though Pisces.

Taylor Iman (01:09:33):
Toxic.

Chrissy A. (01:09:35):
No, he wasn't toxic at all.
He's not toxic at all.
I heard women he wasn't blackSay that.

Taylor Iman (01:09:43):
Say that, say that, when I've seen women be like oh
, you're a Pisces, oh, and Ijust be like I get it, I get it.

Erica (01:09:50):
I got it.
I know, I'm just kidding.

Taylor Iman (01:09:53):
For.
Pisces men, pisces men, thePisces men Born in March,
specifically Um, okay, sorry, Iwill say I'm also just, I'm not
a Like water sign as my partner.
It's just not my thing at all.
So there's that you might fuckhim.

(01:10:13):
Nope, we will not drowntogether.

Erica (01:10:16):
Never Did you have to learn that.

Taylor Iman (01:10:18):
We will not drown together.
So let me tell you, this isreally random.
Let me tell you about my firstdate on like my first Scorpio
date ever and this was just likeI don't want to say traumatized
, but it was so weird.
This man was just like, yeah,like you are so caring and
nurturing and my mom died when Iwas young and my stepmom used

(01:10:39):
to make me live underneath thesteps and I just feel like you
could heal that for me.

Chrissy A. (01:10:42):
And I said what Check please?

Taylor Iman (01:10:53):
I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go, but yeah, yeah,
no, I, I don't need.
You know, scorpios representdeath and rebirth and all those
things.

Jasmine (01:10:56):
It's just, you know, no , no, thank, no, no, thank no
thank you for me um, in terms ofethnicity, though, I will say
that I have dated outside myrace and it's for me, at this
point, it's not ideal,especially because what I've
experienced I had to do a lot ofexplaining and I've had to deal
with a lot of racism within myrelationships and so for me,

(01:11:20):
like I'm not necessarily closedoff to dating outside of my race
, but I would prefer to be witha black man, we have to get into
our Galentine's night.

Chrissy A. (01:11:30):
We are celebrating Galentine's today, you guys.
It's your birthday.
Happy birthday, Chrissy.

Taylor Iman (01:11:38):
Happy birthday to you.
Break it down.
Happy birthday to you.

Erica (01:11:43):
Break it down Happy birthday One time for the
birthday.
One time for the birthday.

Chrissy A. (01:11:49):
Two times for the birthday.
Three times for the birthday.
No, I have morals and standards.
I can't shake my ass in frontof everybody online.
My man is watching.
I am conservative.
Everybody online, my man iswatching.

Christina (01:12:11):
I am conservative.

Chrissy A. (01:12:14):
Well, that's what happens when you listen to that
song.
You start twerking.
Okay, so we're going to wrapthis up.
I want to thank you, ladies,for joining me in this episode.
This has been absolutelyamazing.
I'm getting to know a lot ofyou guys, which this is fun.
It's fun getting to know y'all.

(01:12:35):
But, just to wrap this up, youguys, this was just like an
example of what the SisterCircle cards are about.
We always talk aboutrelationships when it comes to
men and women, or whatever yourpreference is.
However, I do feel like thereis a certain power where you do
need to date your friends andyou need to get people, get to

(01:12:57):
know people on a personal level,and I feel like these cards do
just that.
Even off pulling, how many didwe do?
Three, three cards.
We had a long conversationabout them and I think if I
didn't stop them, we would stillbe be talking right now.
Um, so you guys can find thesecards on our website at

(01:13:18):
wwwpureintentions314.com.
Um, yeah, and they're yellow.
The yellow is for friendship,if no one knew that.
So if you guys buy your friendsroses, buy yellow roses because
it's for yes, it's forfriendship.
Um, but thank you guys fortuning in to another parentages

(01:13:42):
podcast and we will see you nextweek.