October 15, 2024 • 40 mins
In this enlightening episode of Purpose Project, Leslie Pagel introduces Jiamia McCoy, a resilient woman who has navigated trauma to reclaim her power. Jiamia speaks about her role as a mother, her work with survivors of human trafficking, and her journey of self-discovery and healing. The episode delves into the importance of recognizing one's story, connecting with one's ancestry, and the transformative power of yoga in releasing trauma. The conversation emphasizes the significance of trust, community healing, and overcoming imposter syndrome through self-care routines and communal support. Tune in to learn about building resilient communities, overcoming personal obstacles, and the healing power of shared experiences.
00:00 Introduction to Purpose Project
00:30 Meet Jiamia McCoy
01:16 Jiamia's Background and Family
03:13 Motherhood and Personal Growth
05:48 Discovering Purpose Through Trauma
13:54 Yoga and Healing
19:07 Finding Community Support
19:49 Building Trust in Your Purpose
20:47 Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
22:29 Daily Affirmations and Self-Care
34:29 Future Goals and Aspirations
38:02 Final Reflections and Takeaways
Resources:
Follow @Bthehands on Instagram
Follow @Thefruityyogi on Instagram
Purpose Project is a research study on the topic of life's purpose. You can follow along in the making of Purpose Project:
Instagram: @purpose.project
LinkedIn: @purposeproject-media
TikTok: @purpose.project
Captions are auto-generated.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:04):
Welcome to Purpose Project.
My name is Leslie Pagel.
Thank you for being here today.
On the show, we have anincredible woman.
Her name is Jiamia McCoy.
Jiamia's story is all aboutresiliency.
It is about healing throughtrauma.
It is about reclaiming ourpower.
(00:26):
You're not going to want to missthis one.
Let's get started.
Leslie (00:30):
Jiamia, thank you so much for joining us today.
I am looking forward to hearingyour story and learning from
you.
Jiamia (00:39):
Thank you for having me.
I'm super excited to just be incommunity, but then also just
like talk about myself a littlebit.
Yeah.
We oftentimes don't feel like wehave a story.
story or a narrative to bring.
We just like go through life andyeah.
So it's good to have someonethat calls me back down to
earth.
Say, yeah,
Leslie (00:58):
we noticed you, you have a story.
Let's talk.
Absolutely.
Well, that's good to hearbecause that's exactly what
we're trying to do with PurposeProject is.
Pull out those stories, havethem reflect and share.
So thanks for sharing that.
Thank you too.
Thank you too.
Before we jump into life'spurpose, huge topic.
(01:22):
Tell us a little bit aboutyourself.
Who is Jiamia
Jiamia (01:25):
McCoy?
Yes.
Wow.
Well, I guess I can go with likethe typical information.
So I'll start by saying that I'ma Capricorn.
Okay.
Leslie (01:36):
So you're the first one to go there.
Jiamia (01:38):
That's like, just like my yogi brain and my celestial
brain really in the forefront.
Leslie (01:44):
Okay.
Jiamia (01:45):
So yeah, but nonetheless, big Capricorn, very
invested in just like family andreally a communal sense as an
individual.
So I was born in North Carolina,so I'm not an Indiana native.
I've been here for the longestpart of my life though.
Lived in Germany before with myfamily.
So my mom, she was in themilitary for 10 years.
(02:08):
Um, I want to say it was about10 years as a cook.
Yeah.
And then also just like beinginvolved in the army.
So yeah, she had us kids andout, you know, making sure that
her family was taken care of outthere.
And at that time, you know, justthriving as best as we could.
And then we came back here tothe States for family and landed
(02:28):
here in Indiana.
So I've been here ever since.
Did your
Leslie (02:33):
mom's travels bring you to Indiana.
Is that how you, you made yourway here?
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Jiamia (02:39):
Yes.
And like, again, just havingfamily here too.
And just like my grandmotherswere here, grandfathers, when
they were alive, they were alsohere as well.
So just being closer to familyand making sure that we are like
keeping those relationships asclosely.
As possible.
Yes.
Yes.
So that's as far as like, justlike my family makeup, there's a
(03:01):
lot of what makes me the personthat I am and even coming into
the forefront saying that I'm aCapricorn because my parents,
they're both Virgos and theywear it.
Oh really?
They wear it.
Oh man.
So, so yes, I'm also a mother.
I have two children.
Okay.
The ages of six and four.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Boy and girl.
(03:23):
So I have a six year old boy anda four year old girl.
I mean, it's so wild because,you know, when I was younger, I
actually didn't want to havekids.
I didn't see that in my future.
And even at that time, I justreally wanted to live my life
and have fun and be in thestreets.
And then when I got pregnant andrealized that, this is my life
(03:46):
and changing a lot of thedynamic of really where I knew I
would be moving forward.
It now suits me completely.
yes.
Suits me.
I just, now I'm like, I can seemyself.
What would life be with Yeah.
Yes.
Without being a mother.
So I'm a mother of many things.
I have fur babies, fish babies,plant babies, that I give a lot
(04:07):
of love and kindness in theirdrinks.
Aww.
Leslie (04:11):
So I'm not that familiar with Capricorns, but is that a
part of the Capricorn energy,the nurturing and, and loving
and mothering?
Jiamia (04:20):
100%.
And for people that are going tobe watching this and listening
in, they may say differently.
That's okay.
I'm here to tell you and confirmthat it is that way, that we are
very nurturing.
grounded spirits, but then alsojust like can be set in our ways
a little bit, but very logicaland just really come to
(04:42):
situations and The most groundedway, really.
Yeah, because especially beingearth signs, we will really try
to remain in that sense as well.
Right,
Leslie (04:53):
right.
Jiamia (04:56):
I'm trying to think of what else.
Oh yes.
So I also have a largebackground in nonprofit sectors,
so I've been working withsurvivors of crime for the last
eight years.
Specifically I was working withdomestic violence, sexual
assault, human traffickingsurvivors.
And now I've been working withhuman trafficking survivors
specifically for the last threeand a half years.
(05:17):
So, I mean, there's a largeassumption of what domestic
violence and sexual assault is,but not a lot of people really
know about what humantrafficking is and how thriving
it is here in Indiana.
So, yeah, I'm a statewidesurvivor's advocate.
I work with them alongsideattorneys in the legal justice
(05:38):
system.
And so, yeah, that's a largepart of just.
That's, you know, what alsodrives my purpose as an
individual.
I was wondering.
Leslie (05:47):
Yep.
Yep.
It's
Jiamia (05:48):
working with survivors, but then also just being a
survivor myself and having livedthrough a pretty traumatic
experience, and then also beinginvolved in just like an
interpersonal violent type ofrelationship that really
prompted me to realize, not onlyam I assisting people in this
way, but while I'm assistingpeople, I'm, naturally healing
(06:09):
myself.
And I actually didn't know thatI was in an abusive relationship
when I started the work that Iwas doing.
So I had no idea that that wasone, my real purpose and two
that I was actually goingthrough what I was going
through.
So it was.
Yeah, it was like an actualizingmoment and that was right around
the time that I had my son.
Wow.
So it just all came together atone time.
(06:32):
But then also just again, likegoing through that traumatic
experience myself and justfeeling like that, that's a part
of it.
You know, that's a part ofgrowth, right?
But then not having thatawareness.
That, that happening would leadinto the trajectory of what I'm
doing now and who I am now andeverything.
Leslie (06:52):
Yeah.
So you didn't know back thenthat you were going to be doing
what you're doing today?
Jiamia (06:57):
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
If someone would have told methat I would be working with
human trafficking survivors, Iwould have looked at them like
they didn't know what they weretalking about.
Like what do you mean?
Me?
No.
Whatever.
Like I had no realcomprehension.
Um, one of just like what waseven going on and what human
(07:18):
trafficking was, but then alsowhere I saw myself in all of
this, right?
How could I assist people?
I had my own things that I wasworking through my own trauma
that I still had to unpack.
But yeah.
Now wow.
I'm here and have been in thisfor eight years in this sector.
Wow.
Working with survivors.
(07:39):
Um, and even just feeling morecomfortable speaking out loud
and identifying that I am asurvivor as well.
Right.
And, yes, making space to beable to name that and call that
Leslie (07:51):
power back.
Right.
Wow.
That is powerful.
To be able to claim it and, andUse it as power.
Jiamia (08:02):
Yeah.
And I mean, just to that pointof being able to leverage it to
knowing that this has been whatI've been through, but then also
understanding that I find acommonality with other people
who have also been through asimilar or even maybe a
different experience, but canrelate to just knowing that
there's more.
There is more to this story thanjust the trauma, than just the
(08:28):
incident, the incidents, therelationships, all of it.
Like there's more to life.
Yeah.
So I really want to put anemphasis on that in any
connection I make, especiallywith survivors that like there
is more to life than what's beenmade normal that isn't safe or
kind to our spirits and ourhearts.
Leslie (08:48):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mm hmm.
So this is about purpose.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What would you say your purposein life is?
Jiamia (08:59):
Oh my gosh.
So I feel as though my purposein life resides a lot in the
power piece that I had justmentioned.
So calling my power back, butnot only my power cause it's not
just about me, me sitting herein this body, in this vessel is
(09:21):
simply.
continuation of what was alreadystarted way before me.
Leslie (09:26):
Okay,
Jiamia (09:27):
and I realized that my purpose is continuing the
movement of the liberation ofour people and especially for
survivors especially those whohave dealt with some type of
sexual abuse sexual violencesexual assault To know that they
are not the only ones that I amnot the only one But then also
(09:49):
that there are individuals whohave paved the way right for
healing right for liberation forcommunity many many many many
years before I got here right
Leslie (10:00):
right
Jiamia (10:00):
and Connecting more to that.
Yeah, so that ended what is it?
indigeneity.
That's the word.
Leslie (10:08):
Okay.
Jiamia (10:09):
Indigeneity.
So just connecting more withlike my roots and where I've
come from, but then also knowingthose roots is where I'm going
to continue to go.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yes, yes, yes.
Leslie (10:22):
So Here's what's here's what I'm thinking of as you're
saying this is I had a woman onthe podcast.
Tell me how we are never goingto know our truth in full
impact.
And this is another example ofthat because you're honoring
ancestors who started to pavethe way and you're, you're,
(10:46):
Carrying that forward andbringing that power forward.
And of course they don't know,you know, that impact that
they've had and how it'scontinuing beyond them.
Jiamia (10:57):
Yeah.
Yes.
And also knowing that it is.
a continuation that isn't justfor me to carry.
Like I don't have to be, andthat's oftentimes what we find,
especially for people whoidentify as black and African
American.
Um, they feel secluded, theyfeel isolated.
And then when there is a momentof Okay, I'm, I'm prevailing.
(11:19):
I'm making it happen.
I'm succeeding.
I know my story.
I see it.
Um, you isolate yourself becausethere is like this reclaiming of
power that you have to do.
It's a whole process.
But in that process, We oftenlose the community aspect of it.
Okay.
(11:39):
Yeah, the community aspect.
And that is what I realize istruly my purpose.
Uh huh.
Is building and being incommunity.
Leslie (11:49):
Right, right.
Right.
Why is that?
Is that a common thing forisolation?
Mm
Jiamia (11:55):
hmm.
Yeah.
And I mean, historic.
So I'm not going to go into awhole history lesson, but
historically it has been knownfor people, especially for black
and African American people tohave been isolated from each
other whenever they were findingmoments of liberation, whenever
they were being able to cometogether and talk about
movement, to talk about waysthat they could then prevail or
(12:18):
be able to reclaim their poweror just have access.
Whether that's food, schools,anything, whenever they did come
together and build community,they were locked up, shot down,
all of these things.
Leslie (12:33):
It's, it's a historical thing that has created new norms
in today's society.
Jiamia (12:41):
Yeah.
And this shows up in aninsidious way.
You know, it's not somethingthat we see in the forefront.
It is literally like we realizein the, in the forties and
fifties ages that we're, we'veisolated ourselves this whole
time.
And now, and the reason why Ican attest to this is because
Because as a lived experienceindividual, but then also
(13:03):
realizing that my parents and myfamily oftentimes isolated
themselves because they weredoing what they could for us.
Right.
And that is the same narrativethat we keep seeing and then the
story is forgotten.
The community is forgotten,because we're doing our absolute
best to reclaim that power.
Right,
Leslie (13:23):
right.
Wow.
Jiamia (13:25):
Yes.
Definitely.
Bye.
So yes.
That that purpose is realizingthat Uhhuh, embodying that, and
then naming that and reallyshowcasing that for all
individuals to know that this iswhat is essential to all of our
healing.
Leslie (13:43):
Right?
Community is
Jiamia (13:45):
community.
Yeah.
Leslie (13:46):
Mm-Hmm.
So talk about the discovery ofit.
How did you come to define thisand name this as your purpose?
Jiamia (13:53):
Oh man.
So I'm also a yoga instructor.
I've been practicing yoga forthe last eight years now, and
that's essentially when I reallyrealized.
Really?
Okay.
There's trauma stored in thebody.
You know, the body keeps thescore is what is said in the
social work world.
And to understand that is toknow that it's not just existing
(14:13):
at a cellular level, but likegenuinely our joints are holding
on to trauma.
Our breath is holding ontotrauma.
So when I started going intoyoga first, I'm like, What is a
downward facing dog?
I cannot keep up with thisteacher.
I, why am I here?
I was sweating.
Like it was a lot.
I did not, I was not feeling itat all.
What brought you
Leslie (14:33):
to the first class?
How did you get to that firstclass?
Jiamia (14:37):
So I want to give a huge shout out to Emily Hickman.
I'm sending you lots of love andcare.
right now.
And she is the person whoinvited me to her class.
She's a yoga instructor.
And at that time, that wasbefore I even had kids either.
And I was like a baby intern.
She was like, yeah, come toyoga.
(14:58):
And I just didn't know how thatcould serve me.
And I went to class and again,just like, this is whack.
I'm leaving and or just likecutting out early.
And then I continued to go backand.
And then realized that it wasn'tjust the physical part of the
release, but genuinely it wasthe breath that I didn't even
(15:20):
pay attention to and how I nolonger get sick as much or just
various things that come up thattrigger me that now I realize
that my breath stops.
So many people like experiencesomething, you see an accident
happen, your breath, it Juststops innately.
That's just what we do ashumans.
(15:41):
And especially when there's atrigger.
Our breath can be held at thattime too.
And so, that's when I realizedthat like, that was limiting my
accessibility to my own healing.
Genuinely.
Yeah.
Um, even on an emotional level.
So, yes.
started engaging in yoga.
Now I teach.
(16:01):
Yeah, that's what helped me tounderstand the purpose as well
because of the yoga piece.
And of course, I'm a student forlife.
But also now, as as apractitioner, I realized how
important it is for everybody.
Everybody's opportunity to be incommunity is so essential, just
(16:22):
being in a group class to beable to share energy together,
to be able to breathe with oneanother and release with one
another.
I've also realized that in theclasses that I've taught in the
classes that I've been part of.
So that's welcomed me into thispurpose of like, okay, I know
that I'm alive and breathing fora reason, but didn't necessarily
(16:46):
know for a very long time untilI really got into yoga.
Leslie (16:52):
So I'm hearing yoga helped you, understand your
trauma, release some of thatfrom your body and also
reinforced community for you.
Do you think that a part of thatwas about understanding
yourself?
Is that through yoga, you wereable to get a deep understanding
(17:16):
of self.
Jiamia (17:17):
Yes, 100%.
Leslie (17:19):
And then through that is this realization of purpose.
Jiamia (17:25):
Yes.
Yes, and I mean, a lot of it toois because, especially coming
from marginalized communitiesand especially individuals who
are dying at the highest ratesof suicide in the world, black
and African American people,especially youth and men.
You know, there's something tobe said about that.
(17:48):
And there's something to analyzeabout that.
Of what is prompting people tofeel like there is no more
reason to be here.
I need to go.
Leslie (17:57):
Yeah.
Jiamia (17:57):
Leave it to someone else.
And for me even, I've had thosethoughts.
And I realized that being inyoga, Being in community was
what helped me even like just ashort story So going through
yoga teacher training and shoutout to Nina as well So going
through yoga teacher trainingHaving two small children and of
(18:20):
course knowing that my capacitywas limited because I needed to
be in class I needed to go towork.
I needed to be a mom.
I felt about how much time I wastaking away from my kids and
being present with them anddoing my work and going to yoga
class and getting thecertification.
(18:40):
And Nina, she said, you know,It's okay for your village to
show up for you.
Like it's okay.
I'm like about to get emotionalIt's okay for your community to
show up for you like they needcommunity as well Not just you
they do and like you can trustyour community.
And it just goes back to thatisolation thing.
(19:00):
Like, we're trying to doeverything that we can to make
it happen and prevail.
And then we're like, oh, who dowe look to?
I have no one.
And she had to actualize thatfor me.
Of like, your community is here.
Lean on us.
Yes.
And I was so emotional that day.
I just like was a ball of tearsand needed to hear that.
(19:23):
Needed to hear that.
So yes, yes, yes, yes.
Definitely shout out to her andreally shout out to all of the
people who are villagers who aretaking care of the village
because that matters.
I mean it, it is monumental
Leslie (19:41):
What it enabled you to do that, but through your
community, through thevillagers.
Jiamia (19:47):
Yeah.
But then also it's just, youknow, building trust.
Building trust, becauseespecially when it comes to
purpose, that's when it's thetrust factor that comes into
play.
Like, we know there's apotential purpose.
And then when we actualize thatpurpose, we can attain it.
(20:07):
But then trusting as you'reexisting in your purpose,
trusting the moves that youmake, trusting the community
that's around you, that all tiesin to the purpose that is held
and that is put in front of you.
Um,
Leslie (20:22):
Can you speak into that a little bit more?
Because I believe that even whenwe can name our purpose, some
people hold back from pursuit ofit.
And I've thought of it as fear,but there's this trust factor
too.
(20:43):
How do you establish trust
Jiamia (20:44):
yes.
Yes.
I really love this question.
So I have it's like a two parteranswer.
So I'll say one piece is a lotof getting over imposter
syndrome and actually believingin yourself and believing your
purpose and believing the wholereason why you were here to
begin with yeah, and then justBelieving in the people around
(21:05):
you because inevitably when youare able to work through
imposter syndrome and trust inyourself and actualize who you
are meant to be and what you aremeant to do, then inevitably
you're able to extend that evenfurther to those around you.
And it's not a fake, it's not afacade, it's not like a cringey
moment.
(21:25):
You're just existing.
And what happens, happens.
And you trust that no matterwhat, you are doing the best you
can.
And that's all that matters.
Yeah.
At the day.
Leslie (21:34):
So how do you trust in yourself?
You know, I'm thinking of allthe times that voice in my head
has been there and been like,what are you doing here?
you can't do this.
How do you quiet that voice?
Oh man,
Jiamia (21:50):
I have many, many, many days.
I even, Believe the other nightI was teaching yoga and I've
been teaching for almost a yearnow.
And I even had that voice thatcame in and was just like, do
you even remember what the nextstep is?
See, you should have practicedmore.
Why didn't you practice thismorning?
Why did you have so much goingon today?
(22:10):
Or you would have been like allof these thoughts came in and
how I work through that is Ibreathe right when that happens.
I inhale through the nose and Iexhale through the nose.
I'm just like release it,release those voices and just do
the best you can.
And a lot of affirmations.
(22:30):
So I practice affirmations everyday, especially with my kiddos.
I'm like, we're divine.
We love ourselves.
We're amazing.
We're brave.
We're strong.
We're kind.
Just different aspects that asmuch as you repeat it to
yourself, it becomes a norm.
It becomes what is your normalviewpoint of yourself and others
(22:53):
around you.
Leslie (22:54):
It's like training that voice in the head to be saying
different things.
Like, you've got this.
You've done this before.
Right.
So are affirmations a part ofyour routine?
Yes, it is.
Yeah, and
Jiamia (23:08):
I enjoy it.
I mean even if it's just like awritten affirmation a verbal
affirmation It's definitelysomething I engage in without
it.
I still feel okay during the dayI will say though when I have my
affirmations, I'm like hoppingand skipping and like, yeah,
it's like one of thoseaccessibility points that allow
(23:30):
you to just be a little moreopen, especially when it comes
to the heart space because, youknow, even just describing what
I've been through and traumabeing held in the body.
A lot of us have heartburn orjust little things that happen
in the heart space, even withour lungs, our spleen.
that limit us from being able tojust like release impurities,
(23:53):
release toxins in our body thatthen fuel our nervous system,
which then fuel
Leslie (23:59):
those negative
Jiamia (24:00):
thoughts.
Leslie (24:01):
So I am sitting here thinking my morning routine is
affirmations.
Jiamia (24:08):
Yes.
Leslie (24:08):
Coffee's beautiful.
You know?
Jiamia (24:12):
And coffee's good.
I'm a tea drinker.
Okay.
But I, I do not, I do not judge.
And I love that there is likesome type of routine that
includes serving self.
That matters.
And I really feel like that'swhat builds trust as well.
It's just like.
Prioritizing your self care.
Prioritizing your selfdiscovery.
Right.
Because that matters more thananything in this world.
(24:34):
More than working.
More than putting the word outthere.
Anything.
What matters is your selfdiscovery.
That's the part of being human.
We were placed here to knowourselves.
Right.
Right.
Yes.
Leslie (24:47):
So we've talked about how you discovered your purpose
and the role that yoga hasplayed in helping you through
your trauma, helping youunderstand yourself, and you've
shared some tips on how we cando some of that for ourselves.
where are you at right now withyour purpose and actualizing it?
(25:08):
Hmm.
I love this question too.
Jiamia (25:10):
So where I'm at right now is, I mean, genuinely
yesterday we had the monumentalyoga.
So shout out to Indie YogaMovement.
All of these shout outs becauseI love y'all nonetheless.
Yes.
So Even just being able to bearound individuals and talk
(25:31):
about this more of how we'relooking to build a donation
based yoga program.
Okay.
So that payment shouldn't be abarrier for people to engage in
wellness.
Right.
So, just like various aspectsthat are increasing
accessibility for marginalizedcommunities.
So that's like one.
Pillar that I'm focusing on asfar as living in my purpose and
knowing my purpose but alsocreating something that's
(25:55):
Generational for my kids hasalso been a large part of my
purpose and my process and alsobeing able to know What is set
out and?
Me doing the setting of it Sonot just leaving it to the
universe not just leaving it outof my hands right hoping that
things will be different Butreally like holding on to the
(26:15):
reins Maintaining that power andthen also maintaining my own
sense of what brought me here tobegin with and what keeps me
going in this work.
So yeah, I would say that it'scontinuing to grow.
We're looking to potentiallyopen a
Leslie (26:34):
studio soon.
Really?
Okay, is this with the nonprofit that you mentioned?
Yes.
Okay, tell us a little bit moreabout that.
Jiamia (26:41):
Yes, so another shout out.
Okay.
Leslie (26:44):
Love all the shout outs.
Jiamia (26:46):
Yes.
So B The Hands RelaxationWellness is one of my partners
and this is also an individualthat I collaborate with to teach
donation based yoga.
Okay.
So what we're looking to do iscontinue to build community, but
then also increase thataccessibility to wellness.
So that's through just havingfood sovereignty, being able to
(27:07):
access what yoga classes andwellness classes, but then also.
engaging in solidarity withindividuals that look like them.
So yes, that's pretty much likejust a quick overview of really
the nonprofit space and whatwe're looking to grow in that
sense and continuing thatpurpose as well.
Leslie (27:28):
And if people who are listening want to support, how
would they do that?
Jiamia (27:33):
Yes.
So you can support by following@bthehands on Instagram.
And with that, definitely keepup with us.
You can also follow me onInstagram@thefruityyogi and that
is my personal page, but also myyoga page.
And then I also have my businesspage at jabofjuice.com.
Where I make all natural fruitand veggie juices for the
(27:56):
community as well.
I
Leslie (27:57):
didn't, we haven't
Jiamia (27:57):
talked about that either.
I'm like, I got like six, sevendifferent hats.
That's why I'm like all over theplace with my words.
Cause what are words?
Leslie (28:08):
It's, what's it called?
Jabba juice?
Jiamia (28:10):
Jab of juice.
Jab
Leslie (28:11):
of juice.
Yes.
Okay.
Yes.
Jiamia (28:14):
So JAB is actually, or are actually, the acronyms of
both of my children's names.
Oh, nice.
And, you know, I wanted tocreate something that I knew
would be able to, you know, helpcontinue to flourish in our
family.
Then also, this was a seed thatwas really planted during COVID.
Leslie (28:34):
Okay.
And I started
Jiamia (28:35):
realizing everyone's immunity was really out of
whack.
And then also just my ownpersonal healing journey that I
was working through.
I knew that I wanted to releasecertain things in my body that
didn't seem to keep flushing outwhen I was doing yoga.
And then I stumbled acrossjuicing and then I don't want to
not give credit where it's duebecause my mother really paved
(28:56):
the way for that She was theorganic cook.
She was the person who wasreally in a more live foods type
of agenda and cooking space shewas that type who cooked really
well for us and we appreciatedit.
And now that I'm here with thejuice business and of course
being community, I realized thatshe's also paved a lot of the
(29:18):
way for that.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
How
Leslie (29:21):
do you do all of this?
Jiamia (29:25):
I will say that I do get overwhelmed sometimes, you know,
it's just natural just to haveSeven different hats that are
being worn.
I'm also going to law school.
So it's just like, you know,what is all this?
How do I manage?
I will say though that I've beengetting a lot better with
managing my time.
I feel like that is a part of myown self care and my own self
(29:47):
discovery is to know that I dobetter when I don't
procrastinate.
I feel like that.
feel better when I am ahead ofthe game or feel better even
when I am managing my time rightin a proper way that serves me
too.
Right.
So I still make time to go getmy hair done.
Good.
I still make time to go getpedicures.
(30:07):
I still make time to be incommunity with my friends, not
just working, but literally wejust want to go hang out and
talk shit.
Like that's, that is importantto me.
And that's what helps me tothen.
continue the build and continuemy purpose as well.
Leslie (30:23):
Right.
Jiamia (30:24):
So yeah, yeah.
Hopefully I feel like that kindof answers how.
I
Leslie (30:29):
mean, I'm still wondering like, how does it, how
do you fit all that in a day?
Jiamia (30:34):
Yeah.
Leslie (30:35):
Um, yeah.
But what I heard you say is thatyou prioritize it and you, don't
procrastinate.
So that you're able to fit itin, in a way that serves you.
Yeah.
Jiamia (30:52):
Yeah.
And I mean, it's not easy.
It is not easy.
I have many days where I stay upvery late and then get up first
thing in the morning at 5am.
And my day does not stop allday.
And, you know, I do everythingthat I can to realize that it's
temporary.
Okay.
You know, I, I definitely feedthat to my nervous system all
(31:16):
the time.
This is temporary.
This is temporary.
Soon enough there will be, andthere are other individuals.
Who are continuing this work aswell, who are stepping in and
going to say, set it down.
I got it.
And, but then this is theCapricorn type A personality
that's like, I have it untilsomeone
Leslie (31:38):
does that.
Jiamia (31:41):
But it's okay.
It is.
Oh, okay.
We appreciate it.
And I'm grateful for what's beenset in front of me, you know, by
God, I will continue.
To make all of this happen andcontinue to serve my community
as well as be able to continuefor my own purpose as much as
what's already here because itwould not be here if it wasn't
(32:04):
meant to be.
Leslie (32:04):
Yeah.
,what has been the hardest partof, when you look back and you
think, wow, that, that has beenthe hardest part of my purpose
pursuit.
What is that for you?
Jiamia (32:19):
So I'll say that the hardest part that I worked
through, and this is just,public knowledge, but having
been in a relationship with mychildren's father for a very
long time and then releasingthat, we were engaged to be
married.
And I was prepared to be a wife.
I was prepared to like, have apartnership and do this all with
(32:42):
someone.
Um, and now being a single momand continuing this work by
myself.
Has been a huge adjustmentperiod.
And I'm, my daughter's four andI'm still trying to work through
that.
And just like managing it on myown.
Mm hmm.
I do the best I can.
Yeah.
But I will say that that's beenthe hardest.
(33:04):
Really get over since I'vestarted my healing journey is
just doing this in solitude andbuilding that community at the
same time.
Right.
But as far as like an intimaterelationship.
Leslie (33:15):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You don't have that kind ofpartner in life to, To lean on
Jiamia (33:24):
yeah, and that's so important.
I do not want that to gounacknowledged people that like
having a partner having someonewho lifts you up and even In an
intimate way, having someone whoshows care and compassion to you
does add to your self care.
(33:45):
Right.
It does add to your selfdiscovery.
That matters.
Leslie (33:49):
Yeah.
Jiamia (33:50):
Yeah, I feel like there's a bit of toxicity
happening in our culture thatmakes people feel like it's,
it's something that you shouldbe in solitude all the time and
that you just should be byyourself.
Uh huh.
And that's, that's, uh, It's thebest life to live and it's, as
human beings, no, that's afacade.
Our best life to live is when weare with each other.
(34:13):
And of course, continuing thatself discovery, continuing, if
you need to be in solitude, thatis your choice, but I don't want
it to go unrecognized howimportant it is to like connect
with people and to buildconnection with
Leslie (34:28):
people.
When you look forward intowhatever time horizon that is,
what do you see for yourpurpose?
What does that look like?
Jiamia (34:42):
Many things, actually.
So, basically, having graduatedfrom college, so I'll be
continuing my education with IUIndy, but then really being able
to start some type of resiliencycenter.
That gives back to the communityis, It's a major goal of mine.
I know that I had talked aboutthe yoga studio that I'm looking
(35:03):
to partner on and then buildingsuccession plans with every
business and every nonprofitthat I have my hand in.
So that is really where I seethings is, yes, having a
succession plan, having thesedifferent staples in the
community, and even if I'm notat the forefront of it.
Just being able to lift otherpeople up that then want to
(35:25):
continue that mission I'mwilling to pivot however I need
to, but knowing that I do wantto not just hold on to all of
this forever, but continue thisand set this down and, or allow
others to really take this on ortake whatever they'd like to on
(35:45):
and for me to be able to liftthem up.
Leslie (35:47):
Yeah.
What does progress for yourpurpose look like in that
horizon?
Jiamia (35:56):
Grant funding, funding for my businesses, but then also
the progress of it isessentially just broadening the
scope.
Um, really what is evenhappening.
So that's just continuing themission, but then also making it
where there's more community andmore districts that are being
(36:18):
touched by this ideology thatlike community is at the
forefront of our healing.
Right.
Um, yeah, that's what thatprogress would look like.
And it's not even the number ofpeople.
It's really just like the impactand
Leslie (36:31):
the quality of the community.
Jiamia (36:34):
Yes.
Leslie (36:34):
Yeah.
Mm-Hmm.
Yeah.
Jiamia (36:36):
I would say that's progress.
Leslie (36:37):
Absolutely.
Jiamia (36:38):
Lowering the amount of individuals that are committing
suicide in the black and AfricanAmerican community like that is
progress to me.
Mm-Hmm.
Mm-Hmm.
You know, so that, yes.
Yeah.
I would say that,
Leslie (36:49):
yeah.
When you think about how you areliving your life through your
purpose, how does that make youfeel?
Jiamia (37:01):
I feel like all warm inside and I just get giddy
because it's like cringy as itcan be.
And even just me getting stompeda couple times on this
conversation.
Just being like, Because it'slike the first time I've ever
really, like, spoken out loud alot of the trauma and sadness
that I've experienced.
At the same time, I feelextremely motivated and
(37:24):
encouraged because I know, Iknow, I know, that at the end of
the day, it is not about me.
I have children now and, and forthem to know and feel better
about themselves is mymotivator.
Right.
Beyond the community even, solike it's making sure that them
(37:47):
being in community as they getolder will be safer, will be
more comprehensive and, and willbe essentially and hopefully
really tailored to this youththat are coming into our world
and taking over.
Yeah.
Leslie (38:01):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, we've talked about a lot.
Is there anything left unsaidabout purpose and How you
discovered it, what you're doingto realize it.
Jiamia (38:14):
So I would say, don't shy away from knowledge, read,
read, read.
Allow your brain to expand andthat's what's really helped me
with my purpose as well and myown self discovery is that of
course journaling and writing,those are huge pillars that I
love to lean into, but reading.
Increasing my knowledge base ofwhat it is that's going on in
(38:39):
the world or knowing what couldbe my purpose is, yeah, it's
essential and also free alloppressed people because that is
a huge part of my purpose ismaking sure that the oppression
does not continue to kill us atthe rates that it is.
So yeah, that's pretty much allI wanted to say.
Leslie (39:00):
Thank you so much for being here.
I am going to be thinking aboutthis conversation, I know, for
many days ahead.
So thank you so much.
Jiamia (39:12):
Thank you for having me.
I really appreciate it.
Thank you, Jiamia, for being onthe show and thank you all for
tuning in.
I am leaving this conversation.
filled with new knowledge, newinsights that I'm going to take
forward with me.
Two of those are one, the powerof our breath and how our breath
(39:34):
can help us heal.
It can help us gain clarity.
It can give us insight intoourselves.
The other is the generationalimpact.
of living a life of purpose andhow those before us that live
their life of purpose paved theway for us and our opportunity
(39:54):
to live a life of purpose forthe generations to come.
Thank you all for tuning in.
Leslie (40:06):
Purpose project is brought to you for education and
for entertainment purposes.
This podcast is not intended toreplace the advice that you
would receive from a licensedtherapist or doctor or any other
qualified
Welcome to Purpose Project.
My name is Leslie Pagel.
Thank you for being here today.
On the show, we have anincredible woman.
Her name is Jiamia McCoy.
Jiamia's story is all aboutresiliency.
It is about healing throughtrauma.
It is about reclaiming ourpower.
(00:26):
You're not going to want to missthis one.
Let's get started.
Leslie (00:30):
Jiamia, thank you so much for joining us today.
I am looking forward to hearingyour story and learning from
you.
Jiamia (00:39):
Thank you for having me.
I'm super excited to just be incommunity, but then also just
like talk about myself a littlebit.
Yeah.
We oftentimes don't feel like wehave a story.
story or a narrative to bring.
We just like go through life andyeah.
So it's good to have someonethat calls me back down to
earth.
Say, yeah,
Leslie (00:58):
we noticed you, you have a story.
Let's talk.
Absolutely.
Well, that's good to hearbecause that's exactly what
we're trying to do with PurposeProject is.
Pull out those stories, havethem reflect and share.
So thanks for sharing that.
Thank you too.
Thank you too.
Before we jump into life'spurpose, huge topic.
(01:22):
Tell us a little bit aboutyourself.
Who is Jiamia
Jiamia (01:25):
McCoy?
Yes.
Wow.
Well, I guess I can go with likethe typical information.
So I'll start by saying that I'ma Capricorn.
Okay.
Leslie (01:36):
So you're the first one to go there.
Jiamia (01:38):
That's like, just like my yogi brain and my celestial
brain really in the forefront.
Leslie (01:44):
Okay.
Jiamia (01:45):
So yeah, but nonetheless, big Capricorn, very
invested in just like family andreally a communal sense as an
individual.
So I was born in North Carolina,so I'm not an Indiana native.
I've been here for the longestpart of my life though.
Lived in Germany before with myfamily.
So my mom, she was in themilitary for 10 years.
(02:08):
Um, I want to say it was about10 years as a cook.
Yeah.
And then also just like beinginvolved in the army.
So yeah, she had us kids andout, you know, making sure that
her family was taken care of outthere.
And at that time, you know, justthriving as best as we could.
And then we came back here tothe States for family and landed
(02:28):
here in Indiana.
So I've been here ever since.
Did your
Leslie (02:33):
mom's travels bring you to Indiana.
Is that how you, you made yourway here?
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Jiamia (02:39):
Yes.
And like, again, just havingfamily here too.
And just like my grandmotherswere here, grandfathers, when
they were alive, they were alsohere as well.
So just being closer to familyand making sure that we are like
keeping those relationships asclosely.
As possible.
Yes.
Yes.
So that's as far as like, justlike my family makeup, there's a
(03:01):
lot of what makes me the personthat I am and even coming into
the forefront saying that I'm aCapricorn because my parents,
they're both Virgos and theywear it.
Oh really?
They wear it.
Oh man.
So, so yes, I'm also a mother.
I have two children.
Okay.
The ages of six and four.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Boy and girl.
(03:23):
So I have a six year old boy anda four year old girl.
I mean, it's so wild because,you know, when I was younger, I
actually didn't want to havekids.
I didn't see that in my future.
And even at that time, I justreally wanted to live my life
and have fun and be in thestreets.
And then when I got pregnant andrealized that, this is my life
(03:46):
and changing a lot of thedynamic of really where I knew I
would be moving forward.
It now suits me completely.
yes.
Suits me.
I just, now I'm like, I can seemyself.
What would life be with Yeah.
Yes.
Without being a mother.
So I'm a mother of many things.
I have fur babies, fish babies,plant babies, that I give a lot
(04:07):
of love and kindness in theirdrinks.
Aww.
Leslie (04:11):
So I'm not that familiar with Capricorns, but is that a
part of the Capricorn energy,the nurturing and, and loving
and mothering?
Jiamia (04:20):
100%.
And for people that are going tobe watching this and listening
in, they may say differently.
That's okay.
I'm here to tell you and confirmthat it is that way, that we are
very nurturing.
grounded spirits, but then alsojust like can be set in our ways
a little bit, but very logicaland just really come to
(04:42):
situations and The most groundedway, really.
Yeah, because especially beingearth signs, we will really try
to remain in that sense as well.
Right,
Leslie (04:53):
right.
Jiamia (04:56):
I'm trying to think of what else.
Oh yes.
So I also have a largebackground in nonprofit sectors,
so I've been working withsurvivors of crime for the last
eight years.
Specifically I was working withdomestic violence, sexual
assault, human traffickingsurvivors.
And now I've been working withhuman trafficking survivors
specifically for the last threeand a half years.
(05:17):
So, I mean, there's a largeassumption of what domestic
violence and sexual assault is,but not a lot of people really
know about what humantrafficking is and how thriving
it is here in Indiana.
So, yeah, I'm a statewidesurvivor's advocate.
I work with them alongsideattorneys in the legal justice
(05:38):
system.
And so, yeah, that's a largepart of just.
That's, you know, what alsodrives my purpose as an
individual.
I was wondering.
Leslie (05:47):
Yep.
Yep.
It's
Jiamia (05:48):
working with survivors, but then also just being a
survivor myself and having livedthrough a pretty traumatic
experience, and then also beinginvolved in just like an
interpersonal violent type ofrelationship that really
prompted me to realize, not onlyam I assisting people in this
way, but while I'm assistingpeople, I'm, naturally healing
(06:09):
myself.
And I actually didn't know thatI was in an abusive relationship
when I started the work that Iwas doing.
So I had no idea that that wasone, my real purpose and two
that I was actually goingthrough what I was going
through.
So it was.
Yeah, it was like an actualizingmoment and that was right around
the time that I had my son.
Wow.
So it just all came together atone time.
(06:32):
But then also just again, likegoing through that traumatic
experience myself and justfeeling like that, that's a part
of it.
You know, that's a part ofgrowth, right?
But then not having thatawareness.
That, that happening would leadinto the trajectory of what I'm
doing now and who I am now andeverything.
Leslie (06:52):
Yeah.
So you didn't know back thenthat you were going to be doing
what you're doing today?
Jiamia (06:57):
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
If someone would have told methat I would be working with
human trafficking survivors, Iwould have looked at them like
they didn't know what they weretalking about.
Like what do you mean?
Me?
No.
Whatever.
Like I had no realcomprehension.
Um, one of just like what waseven going on and what human
(07:18):
trafficking was, but then alsowhere I saw myself in all of
this, right?
How could I assist people?
I had my own things that I wasworking through my own trauma
that I still had to unpack.
But yeah.
Now wow.
I'm here and have been in thisfor eight years in this sector.
Wow.
Working with survivors.
(07:39):
Um, and even just feeling morecomfortable speaking out loud
and identifying that I am asurvivor as well.
Right.
And, yes, making space to beable to name that and call that
Leslie (07:51):
power back.
Right.
Wow.
That is powerful.
To be able to claim it and, andUse it as power.
Jiamia (08:02):
Yeah.
And I mean, just to that pointof being able to leverage it to
knowing that this has been whatI've been through, but then also
understanding that I find acommonality with other people
who have also been through asimilar or even maybe a
different experience, but canrelate to just knowing that
there's more.
There is more to this story thanjust the trauma, than just the
(08:28):
incident, the incidents, therelationships, all of it.
Like there's more to life.
Yeah.
So I really want to put anemphasis on that in any
connection I make, especiallywith survivors that like there
is more to life than what's beenmade normal that isn't safe or
kind to our spirits and ourhearts.
Leslie (08:48):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mm hmm.
So this is about purpose.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What would you say your purposein life is?
Jiamia (08:59):
Oh my gosh.
So I feel as though my purposein life resides a lot in the
power piece that I had justmentioned.
So calling my power back, butnot only my power cause it's not
just about me, me sitting herein this body, in this vessel is
(09:21):
simply.
continuation of what was alreadystarted way before me.
Leslie (09:26):
Okay,
Jiamia (09:27):
and I realized that my purpose is continuing the
movement of the liberation ofour people and especially for
survivors especially those whohave dealt with some type of
sexual abuse sexual violencesexual assault To know that they
are not the only ones that I amnot the only one But then also
(09:49):
that there are individuals whohave paved the way right for
healing right for liberation forcommunity many many many many
years before I got here right
Leslie (10:00):
right
Jiamia (10:00):
and Connecting more to that.
Yeah, so that ended what is it?
indigeneity.
That's the word.
Leslie (10:08):
Okay.
Jiamia (10:09):
Indigeneity.
So just connecting more withlike my roots and where I've
come from, but then also knowingthose roots is where I'm going
to continue to go.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yes, yes, yes.
Leslie (10:22):
So Here's what's here's what I'm thinking of as you're
saying this is I had a woman onthe podcast.
Tell me how we are never goingto know our truth in full
impact.
And this is another example ofthat because you're honoring
ancestors who started to pavethe way and you're, you're,
(10:46):
Carrying that forward andbringing that power forward.
And of course they don't know,you know, that impact that
they've had and how it'scontinuing beyond them.
Jiamia (10:57):
Yeah.
Yes.
And also knowing that it is.
a continuation that isn't justfor me to carry.
Like I don't have to be, andthat's oftentimes what we find,
especially for people whoidentify as black and African
American.
Um, they feel secluded, theyfeel isolated.
And then when there is a momentof Okay, I'm, I'm prevailing.
(11:19):
I'm making it happen.
I'm succeeding.
I know my story.
I see it.
Um, you isolate yourself becausethere is like this reclaiming of
power that you have to do.
It's a whole process.
But in that process, We oftenlose the community aspect of it.
Okay.
(11:39):
Yeah, the community aspect.
And that is what I realize istruly my purpose.
Uh huh.
Is building and being incommunity.
Leslie (11:49):
Right, right.
Right.
Why is that?
Is that a common thing forisolation?
Mm
Jiamia (11:55):
hmm.
Yeah.
And I mean, historic.
So I'm not going to go into awhole history lesson, but
historically it has been knownfor people, especially for black
and African American people tohave been isolated from each
other whenever they were findingmoments of liberation, whenever
they were being able to cometogether and talk about
movement, to talk about waysthat they could then prevail or
(12:18):
be able to reclaim their poweror just have access.
Whether that's food, schools,anything, whenever they did come
together and build community,they were locked up, shot down,
all of these things.
Leslie (12:33):
It's, it's a historical thing that has created new norms
in today's society.
Jiamia (12:41):
Yeah.
And this shows up in aninsidious way.
You know, it's not somethingthat we see in the forefront.
It is literally like we realizein the, in the forties and
fifties ages that we're, we'veisolated ourselves this whole
time.
And now, and the reason why Ican attest to this is because
Because as a lived experienceindividual, but then also
(13:03):
realizing that my parents and myfamily oftentimes isolated
themselves because they weredoing what they could for us.
Right.
And that is the same narrativethat we keep seeing and then the
story is forgotten.
The community is forgotten,because we're doing our absolute
best to reclaim that power.
Right,
Leslie (13:23):
right.
Wow.
Jiamia (13:25):
Yes.
Definitely.
Bye.
So yes.
That that purpose is realizingthat Uhhuh, embodying that, and
then naming that and reallyshowcasing that for all
individuals to know that this iswhat is essential to all of our
healing.
Leslie (13:43):
Right?
Community is
Jiamia (13:45):
community.
Yeah.
Leslie (13:46):
Mm-Hmm.
So talk about the discovery ofit.
How did you come to define thisand name this as your purpose?
Jiamia (13:53):
Oh man.
So I'm also a yoga instructor.
I've been practicing yoga forthe last eight years now, and
that's essentially when I reallyrealized.
Really?
Okay.
There's trauma stored in thebody.
You know, the body keeps thescore is what is said in the
social work world.
And to understand that is toknow that it's not just existing
(14:13):
at a cellular level, but likegenuinely our joints are holding
on to trauma.
Our breath is holding ontotrauma.
So when I started going intoyoga first, I'm like, What is a
downward facing dog?
I cannot keep up with thisteacher.
I, why am I here?
I was sweating.
Like it was a lot.
I did not, I was not feeling itat all.
What brought you
Leslie (14:33):
to the first class?
How did you get to that firstclass?
Jiamia (14:37):
So I want to give a huge shout out to Emily Hickman.
I'm sending you lots of love andcare.
right now.
And she is the person whoinvited me to her class.
She's a yoga instructor.
And at that time, that wasbefore I even had kids either.
And I was like a baby intern.
She was like, yeah, come toyoga.
(14:58):
And I just didn't know how thatcould serve me.
And I went to class and again,just like, this is whack.
I'm leaving and or just likecutting out early.
And then I continued to go backand.
And then realized that it wasn'tjust the physical part of the
release, but genuinely it wasthe breath that I didn't even
(15:20):
pay attention to and how I nolonger get sick as much or just
various things that come up thattrigger me that now I realize
that my breath stops.
So many people like experiencesomething, you see an accident
happen, your breath, it Juststops innately.
That's just what we do ashumans.
(15:41):
And especially when there's atrigger.
Our breath can be held at thattime too.
And so, that's when I realizedthat like, that was limiting my
accessibility to my own healing.
Genuinely.
Yeah.
Um, even on an emotional level.
So, yes.
started engaging in yoga.
Now I teach.
(16:01):
Yeah, that's what helped me tounderstand the purpose as well
because of the yoga piece.
And of course, I'm a student forlife.
But also now, as as apractitioner, I realized how
important it is for everybody.
Everybody's opportunity to be incommunity is so essential, just
(16:22):
being in a group class to beable to share energy together,
to be able to breathe with oneanother and release with one
another.
I've also realized that in theclasses that I've taught in the
classes that I've been part of.
So that's welcomed me into thispurpose of like, okay, I know
that I'm alive and breathing fora reason, but didn't necessarily
(16:46):
know for a very long time untilI really got into yoga.
Leslie (16:52):
So I'm hearing yoga helped you, understand your
trauma, release some of thatfrom your body and also
reinforced community for you.
Do you think that a part of thatwas about understanding
yourself?
Is that through yoga, you wereable to get a deep understanding
(17:16):
of self.
Jiamia (17:17):
Yes, 100%.
Leslie (17:19):
And then through that is this realization of purpose.
Jiamia (17:25):
Yes.
Yes, and I mean, a lot of it toois because, especially coming
from marginalized communitiesand especially individuals who
are dying at the highest ratesof suicide in the world, black
and African American people,especially youth and men.
You know, there's something tobe said about that.
(17:48):
And there's something to analyzeabout that.
Of what is prompting people tofeel like there is no more
reason to be here.
I need to go.
Leslie (17:57):
Yeah.
Jiamia (17:57):
Leave it to someone else.
And for me even, I've had thosethoughts.
And I realized that being inyoga, Being in community was
what helped me even like just ashort story So going through
yoga teacher training and shoutout to Nina as well So going
through yoga teacher trainingHaving two small children and of
(18:20):
course knowing that my capacitywas limited because I needed to
be in class I needed to go towork.
I needed to be a mom.
I felt about how much time I wastaking away from my kids and
being present with them anddoing my work and going to yoga
class and getting thecertification.
(18:40):
And Nina, she said, you know,It's okay for your village to
show up for you.
Like it's okay.
I'm like about to get emotionalIt's okay for your community to
show up for you like they needcommunity as well Not just you
they do and like you can trustyour community.
And it just goes back to thatisolation thing.
(19:00):
Like, we're trying to doeverything that we can to make
it happen and prevail.
And then we're like, oh, who dowe look to?
I have no one.
And she had to actualize thatfor me.
Of like, your community is here.
Lean on us.
Yes.
And I was so emotional that day.
I just like was a ball of tearsand needed to hear that.
(19:23):
Needed to hear that.
So yes, yes, yes, yes.
Definitely shout out to her andreally shout out to all of the
people who are villagers who aretaking care of the village
because that matters.
I mean it, it is monumental
Leslie (19:41):
What it enabled you to do that, but through your
community, through thevillagers.
Jiamia (19:47):
Yeah.
But then also it's just, youknow, building trust.
Building trust, becauseespecially when it comes to
purpose, that's when it's thetrust factor that comes into
play.
Like, we know there's apotential purpose.
And then when we actualize thatpurpose, we can attain it.
(20:07):
But then trusting as you'reexisting in your purpose,
trusting the moves that youmake, trusting the community
that's around you, that all tiesin to the purpose that is held
and that is put in front of you.
Um,
Leslie (20:22):
Can you speak into that a little bit more?
Because I believe that even whenwe can name our purpose, some
people hold back from pursuit ofit.
And I've thought of it as fear,but there's this trust factor
too.
(20:43):
How do you establish trust
Jiamia (20:44):
yes.
Yes.
I really love this question.
So I have it's like a two parteranswer.
So I'll say one piece is a lotof getting over imposter
syndrome and actually believingin yourself and believing your
purpose and believing the wholereason why you were here to
begin with yeah, and then justBelieving in the people around
(21:05):
you because inevitably when youare able to work through
imposter syndrome and trust inyourself and actualize who you
are meant to be and what you aremeant to do, then inevitably
you're able to extend that evenfurther to those around you.
And it's not a fake, it's not afacade, it's not like a cringey
moment.
(21:25):
You're just existing.
And what happens, happens.
And you trust that no matterwhat, you are doing the best you
can.
And that's all that matters.
Yeah.
At the day.
Leslie (21:34):
So how do you trust in yourself?
You know, I'm thinking of allthe times that voice in my head
has been there and been like,what are you doing here?
you can't do this.
How do you quiet that voice?
Oh man,
Jiamia (21:50):
I have many, many, many days.
I even, Believe the other nightI was teaching yoga and I've
been teaching for almost a yearnow.
And I even had that voice thatcame in and was just like, do
you even remember what the nextstep is?
See, you should have practicedmore.
Why didn't you practice thismorning?
Why did you have so much goingon today?
(22:10):
Or you would have been like allof these thoughts came in and
how I work through that is Ibreathe right when that happens.
I inhale through the nose and Iexhale through the nose.
I'm just like release it,release those voices and just do
the best you can.
And a lot of affirmations.
(22:30):
So I practice affirmations everyday, especially with my kiddos.
I'm like, we're divine.
We love ourselves.
We're amazing.
We're brave.
We're strong.
We're kind.
Just different aspects that asmuch as you repeat it to
yourself, it becomes a norm.
It becomes what is your normalviewpoint of yourself and others
(22:53):
around you.
Leslie (22:54):
It's like training that voice in the head to be saying
different things.
Like, you've got this.
You've done this before.
Right.
So are affirmations a part ofyour routine?
Yes, it is.
Yeah, and
Jiamia (23:08):
I enjoy it.
I mean even if it's just like awritten affirmation a verbal
affirmation It's definitelysomething I engage in without
it.
I still feel okay during the dayI will say though when I have my
affirmations, I'm like hoppingand skipping and like, yeah,
it's like one of thoseaccessibility points that allow
(23:30):
you to just be a little moreopen, especially when it comes
to the heart space because, youknow, even just describing what
I've been through and traumabeing held in the body.
A lot of us have heartburn orjust little things that happen
in the heart space, even withour lungs, our spleen.
that limit us from being able tojust like release impurities,
(23:53):
release toxins in our body thatthen fuel our nervous system,
which then fuel
Leslie (23:59):
those negative
Jiamia (24:00):
thoughts.
Leslie (24:01):
So I am sitting here thinking my morning routine is
affirmations.
Jiamia (24:08):
Yes.
Leslie (24:08):
Coffee's beautiful.
You know?
Jiamia (24:12):
And coffee's good.
I'm a tea drinker.
Okay.
But I, I do not, I do not judge.
And I love that there is likesome type of routine that
includes serving self.
That matters.
And I really feel like that'swhat builds trust as well.
It's just like.
Prioritizing your self care.
Prioritizing your selfdiscovery.
Right.
Because that matters more thananything in this world.
(24:34):
More than working.
More than putting the word outthere.
Anything.
What matters is your selfdiscovery.
That's the part of being human.
We were placed here to knowourselves.
Right.
Right.
Yes.
Leslie (24:47):
So we've talked about how you discovered your purpose
and the role that yoga hasplayed in helping you through
your trauma, helping youunderstand yourself, and you've
shared some tips on how we cando some of that for ourselves.
where are you at right now withyour purpose and actualizing it?
(25:08):
Hmm.
I love this question too.
Jiamia (25:10):
So where I'm at right now is, I mean, genuinely
yesterday we had the monumentalyoga.
So shout out to Indie YogaMovement.
All of these shout outs becauseI love y'all nonetheless.
Yes.
So Even just being able to bearound individuals and talk
(25:31):
about this more of how we'relooking to build a donation
based yoga program.
Okay.
So that payment shouldn't be abarrier for people to engage in
wellness.
Right.
So, just like various aspectsthat are increasing
accessibility for marginalizedcommunities.
So that's like one.
Pillar that I'm focusing on asfar as living in my purpose and
knowing my purpose but alsocreating something that's
(25:55):
Generational for my kids hasalso been a large part of my
purpose and my process and alsobeing able to know What is set
out and?
Me doing the setting of it Sonot just leaving it to the
universe not just leaving it outof my hands right hoping that
things will be different Butreally like holding on to the
(26:15):
reins Maintaining that power andthen also maintaining my own
sense of what brought me here tobegin with and what keeps me
going in this work.
So yeah, I would say that it'scontinuing to grow.
We're looking to potentiallyopen a
Leslie (26:34):
studio soon.
Really?
Okay, is this with the nonprofit that you mentioned?
Yes.
Okay, tell us a little bit moreabout that.
Jiamia (26:41):
Yes, so another shout out.
Okay.
Leslie (26:44):
Love all the shout outs.
Jiamia (26:46):
Yes.
So B The Hands RelaxationWellness is one of my partners
and this is also an individualthat I collaborate with to teach
donation based yoga.
Okay.
So what we're looking to do iscontinue to build community, but
then also increase thataccessibility to wellness.
So that's through just havingfood sovereignty, being able to
(27:07):
access what yoga classes andwellness classes, but then also.
engaging in solidarity withindividuals that look like them.
So yes, that's pretty much likejust a quick overview of really
the nonprofit space and whatwe're looking to grow in that
sense and continuing thatpurpose as well.
Leslie (27:28):
And if people who are listening want to support, how
would they do that?
Jiamia (27:33):
Yes.
So you can support by following@bthehands on Instagram.
And with that, definitely keepup with us.
You can also follow me onInstagram@thefruityyogi and that
is my personal page, but also myyoga page.
And then I also have my businesspage at jabofjuice.com.
Where I make all natural fruitand veggie juices for the
(27:56):
community as well.
I
Leslie (27:57):
didn't, we haven't
Jiamia (27:57):
talked about that either.
I'm like, I got like six, sevendifferent hats.
That's why I'm like all over theplace with my words.
Cause what are words?
Leslie (28:08):
It's, what's it called?
Jabba juice?
Jiamia (28:10):
Jab of juice.
Jab
Leslie (28:11):
of juice.
Yes.
Okay.
Yes.
Jiamia (28:14):
So JAB is actually, or are actually, the acronyms of
both of my children's names.
Oh, nice.
And, you know, I wanted tocreate something that I knew
would be able to, you know, helpcontinue to flourish in our
family.
Then also, this was a seed thatwas really planted during COVID.
Leslie (28:34):
Okay.
And I started
Jiamia (28:35):
realizing everyone's immunity was really out of
whack.
And then also just my ownpersonal healing journey that I
was working through.
I knew that I wanted to releasecertain things in my body that
didn't seem to keep flushing outwhen I was doing yoga.
And then I stumbled acrossjuicing and then I don't want to
not give credit where it's duebecause my mother really paved
(28:56):
the way for that She was theorganic cook.
She was the person who wasreally in a more live foods type
of agenda and cooking space shewas that type who cooked really
well for us and we appreciatedit.
And now that I'm here with thejuice business and of course
being community, I realized thatshe's also paved a lot of the
(29:18):
way for that.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
How
Leslie (29:21):
do you do all of this?
Jiamia (29:25):
I will say that I do get overwhelmed sometimes, you know,
it's just natural just to haveSeven different hats that are
being worn.
I'm also going to law school.
So it's just like, you know,what is all this?
How do I manage?
I will say though that I've beengetting a lot better with
managing my time.
I feel like that is a part of myown self care and my own self
(29:47):
discovery is to know that I dobetter when I don't
procrastinate.
I feel like that.
feel better when I am ahead ofthe game or feel better even
when I am managing my time rightin a proper way that serves me
too.
Right.
So I still make time to go getmy hair done.
Good.
I still make time to go getpedicures.
(30:07):
I still make time to be incommunity with my friends, not
just working, but literally wejust want to go hang out and
talk shit.
Like that's, that is importantto me.
And that's what helps me tothen.
continue the build and continuemy purpose as well.
Leslie (30:23):
Right.
Jiamia (30:24):
So yeah, yeah.
Hopefully I feel like that kindof answers how.
I
Leslie (30:29):
mean, I'm still wondering like, how does it, how
do you fit all that in a day?
Jiamia (30:34):
Yeah.
Leslie (30:35):
Um, yeah.
But what I heard you say is thatyou prioritize it and you, don't
procrastinate.
So that you're able to fit itin, in a way that serves you.
Yeah.
Jiamia (30:52):
Yeah.
And I mean, it's not easy.
It is not easy.
I have many days where I stay upvery late and then get up first
thing in the morning at 5am.
And my day does not stop allday.
And, you know, I do everythingthat I can to realize that it's
temporary.
Okay.
You know, I, I definitely feedthat to my nervous system all
(31:16):
the time.
This is temporary.
This is temporary.
Soon enough there will be, andthere are other individuals.
Who are continuing this work aswell, who are stepping in and
going to say, set it down.
I got it.
And, but then this is theCapricorn type A personality
that's like, I have it untilsomeone
Leslie (31:38):
does that.
Jiamia (31:41):
But it's okay.
It is.
Oh, okay.
We appreciate it.
And I'm grateful for what's beenset in front of me, you know, by
God, I will continue.
To make all of this happen andcontinue to serve my community
as well as be able to continuefor my own purpose as much as
what's already here because itwould not be here if it wasn't
(32:04):
meant to be.
Leslie (32:04):
Yeah.
,what has been the hardest partof, when you look back and you
think, wow, that, that has beenthe hardest part of my purpose
pursuit.
What is that for you?
Jiamia (32:19):
So I'll say that the hardest part that I worked
through, and this is just,public knowledge, but having
been in a relationship with mychildren's father for a very
long time and then releasingthat, we were engaged to be
married.
And I was prepared to be a wife.
I was prepared to like, have apartnership and do this all with
(32:42):
someone.
Um, and now being a single momand continuing this work by
myself.
Has been a huge adjustmentperiod.
And I'm, my daughter's four andI'm still trying to work through
that.
And just like managing it on myown.
Mm hmm.
I do the best I can.
Yeah.
But I will say that that's beenthe hardest.
(33:04):
Really get over since I'vestarted my healing journey is
just doing this in solitude andbuilding that community at the
same time.
Right.
But as far as like an intimaterelationship.
Leslie (33:15):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You don't have that kind ofpartner in life to, To lean on
Jiamia (33:24):
yeah, and that's so important.
I do not want that to gounacknowledged people that like
having a partner having someonewho lifts you up and even In an
intimate way, having someone whoshows care and compassion to you
does add to your self care.
(33:45):
Right.
It does add to your selfdiscovery.
That matters.
Leslie (33:49):
Yeah.
Jiamia (33:50):
Yeah, I feel like there's a bit of toxicity
happening in our culture thatmakes people feel like it's,
it's something that you shouldbe in solitude all the time and
that you just should be byyourself.
Uh huh.
And that's, that's, uh, It's thebest life to live and it's, as
human beings, no, that's afacade.
Our best life to live is when weare with each other.
(34:13):
And of course, continuing thatself discovery, continuing, if
you need to be in solitude, thatis your choice, but I don't want
it to go unrecognized howimportant it is to like connect
with people and to buildconnection with
Leslie (34:28):
people.
When you look forward intowhatever time horizon that is,
what do you see for yourpurpose?
What does that look like?
Jiamia (34:42):
Many things, actually.
So, basically, having graduatedfrom college, so I'll be
continuing my education with IUIndy, but then really being able
to start some type of resiliencycenter.
That gives back to the communityis, It's a major goal of mine.
I know that I had talked aboutthe yoga studio that I'm looking
(35:03):
to partner on and then buildingsuccession plans with every
business and every nonprofitthat I have my hand in.
So that is really where I seethings is, yes, having a
succession plan, having thesedifferent staples in the
community, and even if I'm notat the forefront of it.
Just being able to lift otherpeople up that then want to
(35:25):
continue that mission I'mwilling to pivot however I need
to, but knowing that I do wantto not just hold on to all of
this forever, but continue thisand set this down and, or allow
others to really take this on ortake whatever they'd like to on
(35:45):
and for me to be able to liftthem up.
Leslie (35:47):
Yeah.
What does progress for yourpurpose look like in that
horizon?
Jiamia (35:56):
Grant funding, funding for my businesses, but then also
the progress of it isessentially just broadening the
scope.
Um, really what is evenhappening.
So that's just continuing themission, but then also making it
where there's more community andmore districts that are being
(36:18):
touched by this ideology thatlike community is at the
forefront of our healing.
Right.
Um, yeah, that's what thatprogress would look like.
And it's not even the number ofpeople.
It's really just like the impactand
Leslie (36:31):
the quality of the community.
Jiamia (36:34):
Yes.
Leslie (36:34):
Yeah.
Mm-Hmm.
Yeah.
Jiamia (36:36):
I would say that's progress.
Leslie (36:37):
Absolutely.
Jiamia (36:38):
Lowering the amount of individuals that are committing
suicide in the black and AfricanAmerican community like that is
progress to me.
Mm-Hmm.
Mm-Hmm.
You know, so that, yes.
Yeah.
I would say that,
Leslie (36:49):
yeah.
When you think about how you areliving your life through your
purpose, how does that make youfeel?
Jiamia (37:01):
I feel like all warm inside and I just get giddy
because it's like cringy as itcan be.
And even just me getting stompeda couple times on this
conversation.
Just being like, Because it'slike the first time I've ever
really, like, spoken out loud alot of the trauma and sadness
that I've experienced.
At the same time, I feelextremely motivated and
(37:24):
encouraged because I know, Iknow, I know, that at the end of
the day, it is not about me.
I have children now and, and forthem to know and feel better
about themselves is mymotivator.
Right.
Beyond the community even, solike it's making sure that them
(37:47):
being in community as they getolder will be safer, will be
more comprehensive and, and willbe essentially and hopefully
really tailored to this youththat are coming into our world
and taking over.
Yeah.
Leslie (38:01):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, we've talked about a lot.
Is there anything left unsaidabout purpose and How you
discovered it, what you're doingto realize it.
Jiamia (38:14):
So I would say, don't shy away from knowledge, read,
read, read.
Allow your brain to expand andthat's what's really helped me
with my purpose as well and myown self discovery is that of
course journaling and writing,those are huge pillars that I
love to lean into, but reading.
Increasing my knowledge base ofwhat it is that's going on in
(38:39):
the world or knowing what couldbe my purpose is, yeah, it's
essential and also free alloppressed people because that is
a huge part of my purpose ismaking sure that the oppression
does not continue to kill us atthe rates that it is.
So yeah, that's pretty much allI wanted to say.
Leslie (39:00):
Thank you so much for being here.
I am going to be thinking aboutthis conversation, I know, for
many days ahead.
So thank you so much.
Jiamia (39:12):
Thank you for having me.
I really appreciate it.
Thank you, Jiamia, for being onthe show and thank you all for
tuning in.
I am leaving this conversation.
filled with new knowledge, newinsights that I'm going to take
forward with me.
Two of those are one, the powerof our breath and how our breath
(39:34):
can help us heal.
It can help us gain clarity.
It can give us insight intoourselves.
The other is the generationalimpact.
of living a life of purpose andhow those before us that live
their life of purpose paved theway for us and our opportunity
(39:54):
to live a life of purpose forthe generations to come.
Thank you all for tuning in.
Leslie (40:06):
Purpose project is brought to you for education and
for entertainment purposes.
This podcast is not intended toreplace the advice that you
would receive from a licensedtherapist or doctor or any other
qualified
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com