June 2, 2025 • 13 mins
❤️Meet Your Future Wife inside my LESBIAN DATING CLUB https://queercountryclub.com
☎️Want to be featured on the show? Call in! https://queerwomenrising.com/ask-sophia-spallino
🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner
✨Work with me as your COACH
💬Slide into my DMs
https://www.instagram.com/sophiaspallino
Today’s episode is your cheat sheet for getting a girl to actually respond to you in the DMs.
Save these. Copy/paste them. Send them. You’re welcome.
1️⃣ “You seem like someone who actually knows what she wants. Am I right or should I keep scrolling?”
Why it works: It flatters her decisiveness without being generic. And that playful little challenge? It makes her want to prove you right, or cheekily prove you wrong.
2️⃣ “Okay I have to ask… are you the big spoon, little spoon, or ‘depends on the night’?”
Why it works: This skips all the small talk. It’s cheeky, flirty, and dives into playful intimacy without being over the top. It’s irresistible to respond to.
3️⃣ “Something tells me you’re not the type to settle. What’s a green flag you always look for?”
Why it works: It makes her feel like a woman with high standards…which we love. It also gives her a moment to show emotional depth without needing to get super vulnerable too fast.
4️⃣ “I’d bet good money you’re a softie under that confident energy. Am I wrong?”
Why it works: This gently teases her while giving her the perfect opening to reveal more about herself. It’s confident, direct, and it invites a real connection.
5️⃣ “Your vibe feels intentional… what’s something you wish more women noticed about you right away?”
Why it works: This tells her you’re not just here for surface-level attraction. You want to see her. And that? That’s magnetic.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hi Sophia espino here welcome back to Queer women rising,
where we dodge the dating drama and attract emotionally
available women who are actuallyready for something real.
Today's episode What to say in the DMS to attract your future
wife. The five lesbian pick up lines
(00:21):
that actually work. Ladies and days and gays.
This episode is your CHEAT SHEETfor getting a girl to actually
respond to you idioms. Because let's be real, if you
don't slide in the DM smart enough, you really won't get a
response. People complain about it all the
(00:42):
time on regular dating apps. But beyond that, as the founder
of the Queer Country Club, thereare women who will still say,
oh, Sophia, I'm having trouble getting this girl to respond to
my DS. Your, your pick up line was
shit, Samantha. So let's talk about the five
ways you're going to slide in properly, whether it's on a
dating app, whether it's on my dating platform, the Queer
(01:04):
Country Club, Instagram, or wherever lesbians flirt these
days. So save this episode, save these
five pick up lines, copy paste them, send them.
You're welcome. OK, number one, you seem like
someone who actually knows what she wants.
Am I right? Or should I keep scrolling?
(01:27):
OK, the psychology of why this one works is it's flattering her
decisiveness without being too generic, and it's also offering
a playful challenge. It makes her want to prove you
right or prove you wrong, but itmakes her want to respond right.
(01:51):
So I'm going to repeat it again so you can write it down.
You seem like someone who actually knows what she wants.
Am I right or should I keep scrolling?
It's going to get her to respond#2 OK, I have to ask, are you
the big spoon, little spoon? Or does it depend on the night?
(02:14):
Now why is that pick up line going to work?
Because it does skip a lot of small talk and go straight to
bed, but in a cheeky, flirty, playful intimacy way that isn't
over the top too much too soon. It's cute.
It's irresistible to respond to.It's giving.
I don't care what you are, I just want to cuddle.
(02:35):
I just want someone to love. Where is my teddy bear?
Where is my Velcro lesbian? So I'm going to repeat it again
so you can have time to write itdown.
The pick up line goes, OK, I have to ask dot dot, dot, are
you the big spoon, the little spoon?
Or does it depend on the night? Love it.
(02:57):
OK, the third pick up line. Something tells me you're not
the type to settle. What's a green flag you always
look for? Now, why does this work?
It's going to immediately make her feel like a woman with high
standards. It's also going to let her in on
(03:18):
the fact that you are a woman with high standards who's doing
the work and understands what red flags and green flags are
and is looking for someone also healthy.
Because you are giving her a moment to show emotional depth
and putting it out there that you're looking for emotional
depth. And it doesn't force someone to
(03:39):
get really vulnerable really fast by asking them stories
about like red flags or anythinglike that that they've been
through. It's just what's a green flag
you always look for? It's another way of letting
someone say what's really important to them.
What's a little cue that some, someone has it, their life put
together, they know who they are, they're making the right
(04:00):
decisions. So I, I think this one is
really, really good if you're anemotionally mature lesbian who's
ready to just go deep quick because this is going to
immediately get you into the topic of conscious communication
and things that you want in a partner.
OK, so I'm going to repeat it one more time.
The 3rd pick up line is something tells me you're not
(04:23):
the type to settle. What's a green flag you always
look for Now for pick up line #4I bet good money you're a softy
under that confident energy, am I wrong?
That's cute, That's cute. Especially when you serve that
to a masked lesbian. That's so cute.
(04:45):
And it works because it's a little gentle tease that gives
you gives her the perfect opening to share who she really
is and kind of reveal her emotional side, a soft side
about her. It's pretty confident.
It's direct and it invites a real connection.
(05:06):
I think it's fun like, Oh yeah, I'd bet this or that about you.
But saying that they're a softy under confident energy is really
complimenting them on the image they put forward without
complimenting just their appearance.
It's about complimenting their energy.
And it also gives them a moment to say yeah you are wrong.
(05:29):
I'm actually just totally confident and not a softy which
I doubt someone would say but I think it gives them an open
space to share something cute vulnerable.
I would definitely try this on ahybrid, like a lesbian,
somewhere in between. Not like a super femme.
I would, I would, I would serve this to a mask who's ready for a
(05:51):
moment to be like, yeah, I'm a little golden retriever under
here. So I mean repeat that 4th pick
up line one more time. I'd bet good money you're a
softy under all that confident energy, am I wrong?
OK #5 your vibe feels intentional.
What's something you wish more women noticed about you right
(06:13):
away Now this one I think works on anyone with a profile that
they. You could tell they took time to
carefully curate, they took timeto share about themselves and
share what they're looking for. And this is a question that
(06:33):
asked them to go under that surface even more, but
compliments them on what they'vealready done, the best foot
they've already put forward, andlets them know that you paid
attention. When you say you've been
intentional, it's like, hey, I've read this and what you're
saying is important and I like it and I want to know more.
(06:55):
It's letting her know that you're not there for surface
level attraction. You really want to see someone
and that is magnetic. I'm telling you, when in doubt,
go into this number 5 suggestionright here and you will get a
response. OK, I'm going to give it to you
one more time, but OK. The the trick is you can't use
(07:16):
this on someone who hasn't had an intentional profile.
This can only be used on someonewho's really put depth into
their profile. But you will say your vibe feels
intentional. What's something you wish more
women noticed about you right away?
People love to talk about themselves.
People love to share about what they're really looking for, who
(07:39):
they really are, and asking someone what it is about
themselves that they wish more people notice.
I think it's a really deep placeto start without asking for too
much personal information. I like it.
I like it a lot, and I can tell you it works.
(08:00):
Now I know what you're thinking.Because if you're a lesbian,
just to be real, dating is hard.It is.
It's just hard. And it's my job to make it
easier. As a lesbian matchmaker, as the
founder of the Queer Country Club, as a lesbian who's been
through it herself, you might bewondering, do I always have to
(08:22):
do the sliding? Like, do I always have to be the
one to slide into the DMS? And no, you can let people come
to you. You absolutely can.
But if you're treating dating like a little hobby or something
you're not passionate about and you're just keeping it casual
and letting things come to you, you're, it's a numbers game.
(08:45):
It really is. There's so many lesbians in the
world. There's so many that are
actually your type. There's so many that are
actually your type that are actually into you as their type.
And at the end of the day, if you're not putting in the work,
if you were not reaching out to people, there is a lower chance
of you meeting your person. Yes.
(09:08):
Can you randomly just meet your person on the street?
Or she'd be the first match thatyou get inside of the Queer
Country Club? Yes.
But the more you put yourself out there, the more
opportunities you have. This goes for everything in
life, of course. It's the same for dating.
Also, if you're in the Queer Country Club, please be sure to
talk to our AI matchmaker Sapphic Sophie, because she
(09:30):
actually slides into the DMS foryou.
She will hear your preferences. She will start trying to find
someone who matches your vibe, your values, your vision so
you're not wasting time on womenwho aren't aligned with you.
Then she starts real conversations with the two of
you. If you're curious about joining
(09:51):
and you've never heard of Queer Country Club, my lesbian dating
platform, or you've been on the fence, I would encourage you to
apply to be a part of this. There's incredible women from
around the world. People always like, is there
anyone in my country that's there?
We have members all over the globe, of course, primarily so
(10:12):
many in America, but we have members from all over the globe.
And these are lesbians who are actually growth minded, doing
the work, monogamous, and ready for something completely real.
So if you want to know more, DM me.
Fine lesbian love and let's see if it's the right fit for you.
I'll send you an application link or you can just visit
(10:33):
queercountryclub.com, have a little video that tells you more
about it and you can decide if it's right for you.
Also, if you want to meet more lesbians in real life, you're
like Sophia. I want to hang out with people
in real life. One thing you should know about
me is I do not put on events that I would not want to go to
myself. I am a little recluse.
(10:56):
I don't know what type of neurospicy I am, but I
definitely like to be at home bymyself and going to huge events
makes me anxious. I can do like the other night I
went to a lesbian event. Ah gosh, like it started at
10:30 and I was like my baby grand myself cannot handle this.
But I did it and I will tell youI probably do something like
(11:18):
that once or twice a year. There's, there's no, what's the
word that people say? There's no social social battery
in me that works for those typesof events.
So I create events that I would actually want to go to, meaning
a very small luxurious event at a spa resort or a live virtual
(11:44):
speed dating event that you can join from your couch.
So if you want to do either one of those, get in touch with me.
When you join the Queer Country Club, you get access to our.
Meet your future wife live single lesbian speed dating
events online so fun and you literally don't have to move
from your couch and then your second option to hang out with
(12:07):
me and extraordinary lesbians are coming with us to my luxury
retreats. We have been hosting them at
Canyon Ranch. And if you don't know what that
is. I want you to think like
luxurious but very chill southwestern vibes.
Think spa, luxury accommodations, fine healthy
(12:27):
dining, and single lesbians who match your energy.
Everyone is there to make soul connections and you might even
find love. Of course, we can never
guarantee you're going to find love, but let's just say that
it's happened before and I hope that you're next.
That's always my goal when I host these things.
(12:48):
But the soul connections are wildly beautiful and the women
leave changed. I leave changed every time.
I genuinely enjoy this because it's not too many people at one
time. If you're neuro spicy like me,
you will love it. If you like the finer things in
life, you will love it. We do a massage, we do a facial,
(13:10):
a private session with me hanging out with queer women
doing light activities. If you want to know the details
about my next trip, DM me. Retreat now because only 7 to 10
women actually join me each time.
OK, I think that's it for today.I hope you took notes about the
five DMS that you can use the slide into a ladies DMS and let
(13:35):
me know how it goes. Shoot me Adm, let me know how it
goes. You know where to find me on
Instagram. And until next time, keep
sliding into those DMS and keep rising.
Hi Sophia espino here welcome back to Queer women rising,
where we dodge the dating drama and attract emotionally
available women who are actuallyready for something real.
Today's episode What to say in the DMS to attract your future
wife. The five lesbian pick up lines
(00:21):
that actually work. Ladies and days and gays.
This episode is your CHEAT SHEETfor getting a girl to actually
respond to you idioms. Because let's be real, if you
don't slide in the DM smart enough, you really won't get a
response. People complain about it all the
(00:42):
time on regular dating apps. But beyond that, as the founder
of the Queer Country Club, thereare women who will still say,
oh, Sophia, I'm having trouble getting this girl to respond to
my DS. Your, your pick up line was
shit, Samantha. So let's talk about the five
ways you're going to slide in properly, whether it's on a
dating app, whether it's on my dating platform, the Queer
(01:04):
Country Club, Instagram, or wherever lesbians flirt these
days. So save this episode, save these
five pick up lines, copy paste them, send them.
You're welcome. OK, number one, you seem like
someone who actually knows what she wants.
Am I right? Or should I keep scrolling?
(01:27):
OK, the psychology of why this one works is it's flattering her
decisiveness without being too generic, and it's also offering
a playful challenge. It makes her want to prove you
right or prove you wrong, but itmakes her want to respond right.
(01:51):
So I'm going to repeat it again so you can write it down.
You seem like someone who actually knows what she wants.
Am I right or should I keep scrolling?
It's going to get her to respond#2 OK, I have to ask, are you
the big spoon, little spoon? Or does it depend on the night?
(02:14):
Now why is that pick up line going to work?
Because it does skip a lot of small talk and go straight to
bed, but in a cheeky, flirty, playful intimacy way that isn't
over the top too much too soon. It's cute.
It's irresistible to respond to.It's giving.
I don't care what you are, I just want to cuddle.
(02:35):
I just want someone to love. Where is my teddy bear?
Where is my Velcro lesbian? So I'm going to repeat it again
so you can have time to write itdown.
The pick up line goes, OK, I have to ask dot dot, dot, are
you the big spoon, the little spoon?
Or does it depend on the night? Love it.
(02:57):
OK, the third pick up line. Something tells me you're not
the type to settle. What's a green flag you always
look for? Now, why does this work?
It's going to immediately make her feel like a woman with high
standards. It's also going to let her in on
(03:18):
the fact that you are a woman with high standards who's doing
the work and understands what red flags and green flags are
and is looking for someone also healthy.
Because you are giving her a moment to show emotional depth
and putting it out there that you're looking for emotional
depth. And it doesn't force someone to
(03:39):
get really vulnerable really fast by asking them stories
about like red flags or anythinglike that that they've been
through. It's just what's a green flag
you always look for? It's another way of letting
someone say what's really important to them.
What's a little cue that some, someone has it, their life put
together, they know who they are, they're making the right
(04:00):
decisions. So I, I think this one is
really, really good if you're anemotionally mature lesbian who's
ready to just go deep quick because this is going to
immediately get you into the topic of conscious communication
and things that you want in a partner.
OK, so I'm going to repeat it one more time.
The 3rd pick up line is something tells me you're not
(04:23):
the type to settle. What's a green flag you always
look for Now for pick up line #4I bet good money you're a softy
under that confident energy, am I wrong?
That's cute, That's cute. Especially when you serve that
to a masked lesbian. That's so cute.
(04:45):
And it works because it's a little gentle tease that gives
you gives her the perfect opening to share who she really
is and kind of reveal her emotional side, a soft side
about her. It's pretty confident.
It's direct and it invites a real connection.
(05:06):
I think it's fun like, Oh yeah, I'd bet this or that about you.
But saying that they're a softy under confident energy is really
complimenting them on the image they put forward without
complimenting just their appearance.
It's about complimenting their energy.
And it also gives them a moment to say yeah you are wrong.
(05:29):
I'm actually just totally confident and not a softy which
I doubt someone would say but I think it gives them an open
space to share something cute vulnerable.
I would definitely try this on ahybrid, like a lesbian,
somewhere in between. Not like a super femme.
I would, I would, I would serve this to a mask who's ready for a
(05:51):
moment to be like, yeah, I'm a little golden retriever under
here. So I mean repeat that 4th pick
up line one more time. I'd bet good money you're a
softy under all that confident energy, am I wrong?
OK #5 your vibe feels intentional.
What's something you wish more women noticed about you right
(06:13):
away Now this one I think works on anyone with a profile that
they. You could tell they took time to
carefully curate, they took timeto share about themselves and
share what they're looking for. And this is a question that
(06:33):
asked them to go under that surface even more, but
compliments them on what they'vealready done, the best foot
they've already put forward, andlets them know that you paid
attention. When you say you've been
intentional, it's like, hey, I've read this and what you're
saying is important and I like it and I want to know more.
(06:55):
It's letting her know that you're not there for surface
level attraction. You really want to see someone
and that is magnetic. I'm telling you, when in doubt,
go into this number 5 suggestionright here and you will get a
response. OK, I'm going to give it to you
one more time, but OK. The the trick is you can't use
(07:16):
this on someone who hasn't had an intentional profile.
This can only be used on someonewho's really put depth into
their profile. But you will say your vibe feels
intentional. What's something you wish more
women noticed about you right away?
People love to talk about themselves.
People love to share about what they're really looking for, who
(07:39):
they really are, and asking someone what it is about
themselves that they wish more people notice.
I think it's a really deep placeto start without asking for too
much personal information. I like it.
I like it a lot, and I can tell you it works.
(08:00):
Now I know what you're thinking.Because if you're a lesbian,
just to be real, dating is hard.It is.
It's just hard. And it's my job to make it
easier. As a lesbian matchmaker, as the
founder of the Queer Country Club, as a lesbian who's been
through it herself, you might bewondering, do I always have to
(08:22):
do the sliding? Like, do I always have to be the
one to slide into the DMS? And no, you can let people come
to you. You absolutely can.
But if you're treating dating like a little hobby or something
you're not passionate about and you're just keeping it casual
and letting things come to you, you're, it's a numbers game.
(08:45):
It really is. There's so many lesbians in the
world. There's so many that are
actually your type. There's so many that are
actually your type that are actually into you as their type.
And at the end of the day, if you're not putting in the work,
if you were not reaching out to people, there is a lower chance
of you meeting your person. Yes.
(09:08):
Can you randomly just meet your person on the street?
Or she'd be the first match thatyou get inside of the Queer
Country Club? Yes.
But the more you put yourself out there, the more
opportunities you have. This goes for everything in
life, of course. It's the same for dating.
Also, if you're in the Queer Country Club, please be sure to
talk to our AI matchmaker Sapphic Sophie, because she
(09:30):
actually slides into the DMS foryou.
She will hear your preferences. She will start trying to find
someone who matches your vibe, your values, your vision so
you're not wasting time on womenwho aren't aligned with you.
Then she starts real conversations with the two of
you. If you're curious about joining
(09:51):
and you've never heard of Queer Country Club, my lesbian dating
platform, or you've been on the fence, I would encourage you to
apply to be a part of this. There's incredible women from
around the world. People always like, is there
anyone in my country that's there?
We have members all over the globe, of course, primarily so
(10:12):
many in America, but we have members from all over the globe.
And these are lesbians who are actually growth minded, doing
the work, monogamous, and ready for something completely real.
So if you want to know more, DM me.
Fine lesbian love and let's see if it's the right fit for you.
I'll send you an application link or you can just visit
(10:33):
queercountryclub.com, have a little video that tells you more
about it and you can decide if it's right for you.
Also, if you want to meet more lesbians in real life, you're
like Sophia. I want to hang out with people
in real life. One thing you should know about
me is I do not put on events that I would not want to go to
myself. I am a little recluse.
(10:56):
I don't know what type of neurospicy I am, but I
definitely like to be at home bymyself and going to huge events
makes me anxious. I can do like the other night I
went to a lesbian event. Ah gosh, like it started at
10:30 and I was like my baby grand myself cannot handle this.
But I did it and I will tell youI probably do something like
(11:18):
that once or twice a year. There's, there's no, what's the
word that people say? There's no social social battery
in me that works for those typesof events.
So I create events that I would actually want to go to, meaning
a very small luxurious event at a spa resort or a live virtual
(11:44):
speed dating event that you can join from your couch.
So if you want to do either one of those, get in touch with me.
When you join the Queer Country Club, you get access to our.
Meet your future wife live single lesbian speed dating
events online so fun and you literally don't have to move
from your couch and then your second option to hang out with
(12:07):
me and extraordinary lesbians are coming with us to my luxury
retreats. We have been hosting them at
Canyon Ranch. And if you don't know what that
is. I want you to think like
luxurious but very chill southwestern vibes.
Think spa, luxury accommodations, fine healthy
(12:27):
dining, and single lesbians who match your energy.
Everyone is there to make soul connections and you might even
find love. Of course, we can never
guarantee you're going to find love, but let's just say that
it's happened before and I hope that you're next.
That's always my goal when I host these things.
(12:48):
But the soul connections are wildly beautiful and the women
leave changed. I leave changed every time.
I genuinely enjoy this because it's not too many people at one
time. If you're neuro spicy like me,
you will love it. If you like the finer things in
life, you will love it. We do a massage, we do a facial,
(13:10):
a private session with me hanging out with queer women
doing light activities. If you want to know the details
about my next trip, DM me. Retreat now because only 7 to 10
women actually join me each time.
OK, I think that's it for today.I hope you took notes about the
five DMS that you can use the slide into a ladies DMS and let
(13:35):
me know how it goes. Shoot me Adm, let me know how it
goes. You know where to find me on
Instagram. And until next time, keep
sliding into those DMS and keep rising.
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