Lesbians in Your Healing Era | Your Future Wife ICK LIST & WISH LIST #WLW Dating

Ways to work with The Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaker, Sophia Spallino:

💎Platinum Private Luxury Lesbian™ Matchmaking – For the woman who wants her Future Wife® delivered on a silver platter, I do all the screening so you can focus on falling in love.

Explore Private Matchmaking: https://queercountryclub.com/private-lesbian-matchmaking-service  

✨Exclusive Luxury Lesbian™ Retreat at Canyon Ranch – A blissful weekend with an intimate group of extraordinary single queer women… curated to spoil your senses and reignite your belief in love and possibility.

Join The Luxury Lesbian™ trip: https://queercountryclub.com/luxury-lesbian-retreat 

❤️The Queer Country Club® – Our premier dating platform for monogamous queer women who are living amazing lives, but missing just one thing… their Future Partner®.  

Apply to Join QCC: https://queercountryclub.com  

🌈 Private Rising Coaching Session - If you're unsure of your next step but know in your gut you're ready to call in love, deepen self-trust, or design a life you’re proud of, I’m here to guide you.

Reserve A Private Coaching Session: https://queercountryclub.com/private-coaching

💬Got Qs? DM on Instagram → @sophiaspallino https://instagram.com/sophiaspallino

🔺Get Wisp Kitty Care 🐱 Proud Partner

https://bit.ly/sophiawisp

Going through it now? If you ever desire 1:1 coaching with me to work through a breakup, just book a private session with me here: Sophia Spallino | Private Coaching

 

🏳️‍🌈❤️‍🩹I asked the queer women in my community to share breakup advice given to them by the older, wiser women in their lives. So I am gonna read it to you.

 

Then I share my best advice.

 

Lesbian dating and breakups are tough. But you are SOFT enough to feel it, heal it, and move along with your life!

Promise.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
OK, this video is for my lesbians, my delicate babies
that are going through a breakup, going through that
healing journey. Maybe you've been through the
breakup, but you're like, not yourself again and you need to
hear some words of wisdom to getup and remember who you are and
get back into the dating world. I asked some beautiful women in
my community to share what was the best breakup advice that

(00:20):
you've ever received, the best advice that got you to get up
and try again. And so I'm going to read that to
you today and at the end, share my own advice as a dating coach.
So let's get into it. The first thing that comes from
Katie is write down the qualities you want and then
embody them. You need to love yourself first.
Katie A 100% agree. Being who you want to date

(00:43):
allows you to attract that same level energy into your life.
The next one is from CB. You are worthy to be loved.
Her best friend told her about. And I think sometimes we all
need to remember that you are worthy to be loved.
Like you actually deserve a healthy relationship.
Some of us think like we don't deserve that.
Like our own inherent self worth.

(01:06):
Basic beingness becomes nothing after we've been in a bad, toxic
situation. So knowing, no, you're actually
worthy of love, of decency, of romance, of kindness, it's
important, Kathleen says. You can do better.
Foodie girl says God heard and saw things you didn't.

(01:27):
He was protecting you. Oh, that's so good.
That song, I think it's like a country song.
Some of God's greatest gifts or unanswered prayers.
Believe me, I am so grateful forevery breakup that I've ever
been through. I would not want to be with any
of my exes, and I'm just grateful that I ended things
before it got too far, before I was actually legally married to

(01:47):
any of those women. I'm glad that I get to try
again, get to choose better, getto be better myself.
Lucia says you never know who you marry until you divorce
them. True.
Casey says better late than never and RIP it off like a
Band-Aid. So it's better to just end
things, get it over with. Oh this is good from MCB.

(02:10):
There was life before her and there will be life after her.
Pick yourself up and make it happen.
That's some good kick ass advice.
Alyssa says everything you've been through has gotten you so
far and it's true. You're going to be good.
You are good through every past trial tribulation.
You will be fine again. Rayna says you'll have many

(02:32):
first kisses from her 10th grademath teacher.
I love when those teachers make a good impact on you.
A granny would always say you got to kiss a lot of frogs in my
exam and I'm tired of kissing a frog.
Martina says try again from my Mama.
My Mama just goes another one bites the dust.

(02:52):
Every time I go through a breakup, she literally puts on I
think it's what queen and she'llgo another one bites the dust
and we like have a dance. Alex says RIP off the rearview
mirror. That's good because you don't
want to be looking back. If there's a reason that you've
consistently questioned you're worth the compatibility of a

(03:15):
relationship, how worth it is toyou to continue to invest time
and energy into this partnership.
You don't need to be looking back.
You've already thought it through enough.
You don't need another sign. You just need to break up and
listen good from Robbie. When God changes your direction,
it's his protection. He will send misses right half

(03:36):
faith so good. Gabby, who was one of my past
coaching clients says do the thing that makes your eyes shine
and your face glow. Take the job and Uganda.
That's so great. I just like, girl, go live your
dream. And she took the leap and she's
living her best life. I'm so happy to hear that,
Gabby. And my personal advice is to

(03:57):
take out your journal and on your journal, you're going to
have a page on the left and a page on the right.
On the page on the left, I want you to begin to think of all the
ICS. Create a iclist of your past
relationship that hurt your heart.
The things that you were like, never again can this happen to
me. I cannot do it anymore.
Also the little things that werejust icky, just I didn't hit

(04:22):
right. It made me feel less than it.
It made me feel like, I wish youwere doing this instead.
Write that down, OK? You're not asking for too much
to talk about what was not good enough.
OK, write it down then I want you to confidently on the next
page, know your worth and write down the opposite thing.

(04:42):
So if something really hurt yourheart or your partner used to
raise their voice at you, I liketo write it in present tense as
if it already exists. And thank the good Lord, the
divine, the whatever you want tomanifest it.
OK, so I like to say I am thankful that my future or I'm
thankful that my wife because wekeep it present.

(05:04):
I'm thankful that my wife never raises her voice to me and
always speaks to me with kindness and respect.
So if you take what was negativeand then write the positive as
if it exists in full gratitude. If someone cheated on you and it
really hurt you because it does,go ahead and write what hurt

(05:25):
your heart. And on the opposite page, I'm so
grateful for my wife that is loyal, communicates well, and
never makes me look over my shoulder.
She is so in love with me. You're going to go down your
entire list and by the end of that exercise, you're going to
have a page of something that you want to start thanking the

(05:47):
universe for every single day. But most importantly, when you
begin to say these things out loud, you've got to believe it.
And if you can't believe it, it's because deep down inside,
you don't think you're worthy ofit.
And the way to overcome that is to think, why not me?

(06:08):
If other people can have this thing, I would be really good to
a partner. I would, you know, think of all
the reasons why you would be good.
If you were to be so blessed by the universe to have your dream
future wife land at your door, how would you treat her good?

(06:28):
So why not you? And really think about that.
Why not you? You will be so good.
You will be so good. You're getting better every day.
Be confident in that. Why not me?
Like, I'll be so amazing. And if you're not there yet, you
just keep doing that personal work, that personal growth,

(06:50):
until you deeply believe that and do the work to know that you
actually deserve something without doing anything.
You just are a good human, right?
If you can get to that place of why not me and really mean it,
you're able to say thank you anddeep down really believe it.
And while you're thanking the universe and you're reading

(07:12):
through your list, if you can get to the place of worthiness,
the next highest frequency that you can get to to manifest is
going to be gratitude. So remember a time, a thing that
made you feel really happy, likemaybe you're a mother.
So is the first time your baby was handed to you in the
hospital. Maybe you got into your dream

(07:33):
university or you got the e-mailthat you got this job that you
really wanted. Remember those feelings and the
way your shoulders drops, the way you became more at ease in
your nervous system because it was done, because you were
grateful for it, because you could take that deep breath and
it was finished. Done.
That's how you have to read thisfuture wife wishlist.

(07:55):
So you're going to make your future wife ickless.
Then your future wife wishlist. Do this exercise, share it every
day. Speak it out loud every single
day. It shouldn't take you long.
I literally do it at my table every single day with my morning
salt drink. And I don't know how to explain.

(08:18):
It's not for lack of desire of wanting a wife, but it's helping
me become all the things that I want a wife.
It helps hold me accountable to being the best version of myself
and being the energy that I wantto attract without pushing,
without pulling. Yes, dating takes effort.

(08:38):
I mean, as founder of the Queer Country Club, a monogamist
lesbian dating platform, you have to put effort.
You've got to like send women toends and you got to put yourself
out there. You're going to show up to meet
your future wife live speed dating but at the end of the
day, your energy shouldn't be strained to find your person.
Yes, dating is hard and may require some effort, but the

(09:02):
energy that you operate in the world with to attract your
future wife shouldn't be strained.
And that is going to be only possible when you have a solid
relationship with yourself and know your worth and what you
expect in your next relationship.
So get clear. Create your ick with ick that

(09:22):
was wispy. Create your ick list and then
your future wife wish list and let me know how it goes.
And if you liked videos like this, you'd probably love my
podcast. DM me pod if you want to join my
lesbian dating platform or inquire about my matchpicking
services. I'm a DM away.
Just DM me future wife. Hope you have a great day.

(09:44):
I know this is gonna help.