Ashlee K - Not the Plan: Birth, Trauma, and Postpartum Survival

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In this deeply moving episode of Quiet Connection, I’m connecting with Ashlee King, a mother whose path into parenthood was anything but smooth. Ashlee shares her harrowing journey through hyperemesis gravidarum, preeclampsia, HELLP syndrome, a traumatic emergency C-section, and multiple postpartum hemorrhages. Her daughter’s NICU stay was only the beginning of a long road of emotional and physical healing.

Ashlee’s vulnerability and strength shine as she discusses postpartum anxiety, mom rage, and the pressure to “be okay” when everything around her was falling apart. From living in a camper in the hospital parking lot to advocating fiercely for her daughter’s health and her own recovery, Ashlee’s story is a testament to maternal resilience and the power of community.

Whether you’ve faced postpartum challenges or want to better understand the realities many parents experience behind closed doors, this episode offers validation, connection, and hope.

 Key Takeaways

• Preeclampsia and HELLP syndrome can escalate quickly and may be mismanaged if symptoms are dismissed.
• Postpartum hemorrhage can happen days or even months after birth—and often isn’t discussed enough.
• Living in survival mode delays emotional processing, but healing can begin once safety and support are in place.
• NICU stays—regardless of length—are traumatic and isolating experiences that deserve recognition and support.
• “Mom rage” and numbness are real postpartum symptoms, often rooted in trauma, exhaustion, and unmet needs.
• Self-advocacy is crucial in birth and postpartum care—your intuition matters.
• Online communities can be lifelines when real-world support is lacking.

Soundbites

1. “I wasn’t just bleeding—I was watching it pour down my leg while I held my baby in the NICU.”
   
   
2. “I kept thinking… I survived everything, and now I’m going to die from a hemorrhage?”
   
   
3. “Everyone kept saying, ‘Just be happy, your baby’s okay.’ But I wasn’t okay.”
   
   
4. “We put up a front. We were strong for her—but deep down, we were so broken.”
   
   
5. “I wanted the birth in my living room, the perfect moment. Instead, I almost died.”
   
   
6. “Postpartum rage? I didn’t even know that was a thing until it started happening to me.”
   
   
7. “You know your baby. You know yourself. And you have the right to say no.”

If this episode resonated with you, feel free to connect with Ashlee through her Instagram account!

This episode discusses topics that may be triggering for some individuals. Please check the show notes for more information and be mindful of your own mental health and comfort levels.

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Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

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