Episode 175 - Pete and the Pig

Dragonflies, a cool leprechaun story, Allie burps, hairballs, the Superman trailer, too many Christmas movies, and more top 10's!

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
From the top I'm. Going to start this episode off
with explicit language they could have.
Been button heads? We don't know.

(00:21):
We don't know what. Happened.
Would you like to do something for me?
Yeah, what? Kiss that Great.
Bean's the only person that wouldn't be insulted being
called the pig. No, absolutely.

(00:43):
He's our friends. They're very smart animals.
This pig this big? Yes, like 8 inches.
Are you kidding? It was huge.
Did it hurt like a little bit? It's just like 3 flushes to go.
Down. All right, here we go.

(01:06):
I give you quitters, never give up.
Quit repping for all of quitters.
Never give up. Check off.
Christopher check off Jen Pascorini, check off Lindsay.
Hello Drew. The great Ed Wid ladies and
gentlemen. I love him so much because I
said quitters never give up and he said that's all they do.
So I inhaled the banana quite frankly, and then.

(01:27):
Asked What isn't this much better than poop talk, boys and
girls? Everybody's complaining about
too much poop talk. I love party people.
It is Quitters Never Give Up episode 175.
But let's go ahead and say helloto all the quitters.
Here we go. First of all, fuck you, Eddie.
Hi Eddie, how you doing? I was pretty good before that.

(01:49):
Jen Serger was on one on the recent episode Let's Say Hello
to Jen. Fuck, I gotta get her.
I gotta get her. Like, I'm not thinking about
anything else. I'm just like, I gotta fucking
kill Jen. I gotta whammageddon, Jen.
I can do it, Jen. I'm good.
Hello party people. Let's see, that's that's cuz

(02:10):
they're playing Whammageddon. Are you guys playing it?
No. I've lost already.
I just love this caller. That's my favorite.
I got to say, let's say hello toLindsay.
Lindsay decided yesterday, hey, I'm going to fly back to
California. Hey, Lindsay.

(02:30):
Well, hello. Are you back in Cali?
I indeed decided to fly back to California.
Lindsay said. No, I'm not interested in doing
your program. That's you.
Daily. And who am I?
Hold on, Christopher. Chris Kringle, clap crisply.
Chris Kringle, clap crisply. Chris Kringle, clap crisply.
Oh, crisply. Yeah, that's as close as I'm

(02:53):
going to get. It's so.
Easy. I don't know.
I didn't get it well. Let's see how easy it is.
Let's see just how easy it is. Eddie, you're up.
Chris Kringle, clap crispy. Chris Kringle clap crispy.
Chris Kringle, clap Crispy. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Chris Kringle have Lesley Chris Kringle clap.

(03:17):
Kris Kringle clap crisply. Chris Kringle clap crisply.
Chris Kringle crap crisply. Crapped crisply.
Craps Crisply, crisply. All right, we're going to.
We're going to move on. All right, that that's me.

(03:40):
I snuck in an extra clip. What it?
Don't blame me. All right, flashback with no
introduction. Let's get this going.
All right. This was a request from listener
Edwin. It's.
Time for the voices. All right, trim the wheel or the
board or whatever you got there and let's find out what it's

(04:01):
going to land on. All right, come on.
Cattle herd and Beaver. Oh, the female dragonflies that
fake sudden death to avoid male advances.
All right, look, I know that nature is crazy and a lot of
animals out there just have to do what they can do to get by,

(04:21):
but this is a story out of Switzerland.
The University of Zurich in Switzerland, Rasim Khalifa has
been studying dragonflies for more than 10 years.
By the way, she recently witnessed a behavior for the
first time. The Moreland Hawker dragonfly
crash dive to the ground while being pursued by a horny male
dragonfly. Oh my gosh.

(04:42):
Then she lay motionless on her back and I guess the thought is
what? That he thinks she's dead or.
Something, yeah. So we'll move on.
So he flies away and then boom, she's up and she's out.
Oh. My goodness.
When the coast is clear, she's gone.
So that is the the researcher says she was very surprised.
She'd been 10 years sitting, dragonflies had never seen this
before. And now do we have her on the

(05:03):
phone? It doesn't say here, but I'm
hoping. We have, I assume so.
Doctor Khalifa from the University of Zurich,
Switzerland, is on the line. Are you there?
Hello. Yes.
Is this Raseem Khalifa? No.
It's. Not.
I thought you were the dragonflyexpert.
No, I'm a dragonfly. You're the actual dragonfly.

(05:28):
So are you the Lady Dragonfly? No, I'm.
A handsome, handsome male dragonfly.
OK. My name is Jean.
OK, I don't like the. Dragonfly I'm.
Not sure I approve of where thisis headed already, hey.
What, How? How can I help you?
Well, we're calling about this story that we saw that said that

(05:50):
it's it's, it's hard out there for a pimp.
Apparently you're Apparently theladies have figured out a way to
deceive you so that you don't think that they're interested.
What? What?
I've never heard of such a thing.
Because ladies love me. Oh, this one now.
Hello, my lovely lady. You're pretty.

(06:13):
Oh, no, I think she's dead. Oh, did.
She fall out of the sky, you hitthe ground.
Right out of the sky, there's another one.
Hello there, can I show you my pictures of corn?
Oh, that's odd. She died right in the right, in
the middle of the air. There.

(06:34):
Well, I would think that would be very upsetting for you to see
all this suicide happening. Luckily.
There's lots of other ladies, little lovely lady friends for
me to be with. My lovely ladies, right?
Oh, my lovely lady Dragonfly, would you like to hear the wreck
of the Advent Fitzgerald play iton my wings?

(06:57):
It seems like she died as well. This is not rough.
You're not having very good luckwith the women I've.
Never been with one but I hope to sometime in the future.
Well, it doesn't. Sound like my lovely lady lady
lovely. Lady, you like this, Go over to
this pancake with me and have a bite to eat and maybe some

(07:18):
chocolate milk. Oh, another. 1.
Wow, wow. A lot of sick women in this this
part of the slump. It does sound like it's on them.
It's not you. I think you're doing everything
right. Switch up the approach.
Do you think? What what ladies love me?
I don't. They might if I take a picture
of the back of you Love me, LadyDragonfly.

(07:43):
Another one. It is tough out there.
It's really is. Where did you find that
listener, Edwin? Oh, whenever Kevin and Bean are
off the air, I had these mega mixes I made and that's when I
saved and I would listen to whenthey were off the air.

(08:05):
So I just happened to come across that.
I saved it years ago because I thought it was great.
Oh. It's very funny.
Eddie's last week had top 10s, so let's do some top 10s.
This will be for 2009. All right.
It's one of K rock, world famousK rock.
It's 924. You are listening to the Kevin U
Bean show. We have been looking back on the

(08:26):
year almost past the best of 2009 stuff that's happened on
this program. By the way, everything that
we've done today in top 10, Internet roundups, top ten Omar
intros and songs, top ten moments with all that stuff is
going to be up at kevinubean.com, if it's not
already. It will be later on today.
You can also you have been able to for the past 24 hours you've
been able to go to kevin.com andvote on what you think the top

(08:46):
sound bite of 2009 should be. It's one of the things that we
enjoy most about this show are the little little drops and
little funny things that people say that we what we kemosabe.
Oh, how dare you. You are obsessed with the I
enjoy it. Do I enjoy it?
Yes, with the drop of sound that's I think live for I think
the listers like it too. In fact, we got hundreds and
hundreds and hundreds of votes already this morning since we've

(09:07):
been talking about the fact thatyou go on the website and we are
now going to countdown the top 10 sound bites of the Kevin and
Bean show of 2009. I hope you hear your favorite.
And at #10 this one has become not just a popular drop on the
program, it has become, frankly,a device we can't wait to be
built for real. Murder Button.
Murder button. Yeah, murder.

(09:28):
Yeah, the murder button, which was Ralph Garman's idea that
seriously somebody needs to comeup with because how many times
in your day-to-day activities could you use that?
So many people need to die, so many people #8 on the list of
your favorites, You hear this one often times in the showbiz
beat. If ever, oh I don't know, Ralph
brings up somebody like, shall we say, Khloe Kardashian, you
might hear this sound. You're welcome.

(09:53):
Just go ahead, you played it. Chewy.
It's funny, Chewy's been around since the mid 70s, yet he's
found a new life here on the Gavin to Beat show to represent
maybe, well, you know, Beasts Top 10 sound bites of 2009.
It wouldn't be a countdown without #7.
What? Nopey nopey the dog that says

(10:15):
Nope. Nope.
Yeah, nopey, the dog that only says no, that is Gumby's dog.
Nopey at #7 Here's number six. And it was tough to choose
because this guy gave us so manygreat choices to pick from, but
this is the one that made it to #6.
Christian Bale, one of the Oh, good for you.

(10:36):
Wow, that's a good guess, VictorFuentes.
It's my guess. OK.
I think Edwin went over this before.
He's got notes. Let's find out.
Good for you. He's in jail with the great
Christian film. It's so useful.
I mean, out of that whole rant, that's the one that really

(10:57):
shines. No, no, no, no.
It's good, though. No, no, no, it's good.
No, no, no. But I mean, there's a lot of
people screaming. No, I mean, you can get a lot of
violent. No, that is just beauty right
there. One of the one of the best
Hollywood stories ever was the Christian Bale Terminator Rep.
All right, we're into the top five now.
The best sound bites of 2009 by your vote at kevinandbean.com.
Here's another one that Ralph came up with that has got to be,

(11:18):
goddamn it, the catchiest Jingleever.
Would you like to take that back?
No, I think it's this is 2009. I don't know who am I kidding.
I can't tell you how many times in the course of a month I'll be
driving or sleeping or walking or in the shower and this will
come into my head. Would you like to take that

(11:39):
back? Would you like to?
Take. That back.
Tell me what you if you could you would you could you take
that back? Can't get away from it.
Very strong beauty of popcorn has nothing to do with me.
Popcorn is now and forever. All right #4 and I'm going to be
completely honest, I did not influence the voting here.
You picked it. It would have been my number one
if it was up to me. And I think you can imagine the

(12:00):
FBI. Come on, the great Edwin.
Ladies and gentlemen, I, I get emails several times a week from
people who want to know where the FBI came from, the business
lines bringing up the hook, too.I'm telling you, people love it.
It's from the film. That Darn Cat is where Edwin FBI
comes from, in case you want to see that.
All right. #3 and I have a feeling, Ralph, this would have

(12:23):
been #1 on your list. It certainly has been useful to
you as you do the showbiz beat throughout the year.
What's? Happened.
Yeah, Keyboard cat. Keyboard cat everybody.
Best thing ever to get played off by keyboard cat.
I believe I've been played off more than anybody, come to think
of it. Agree.
All right #2 happened fairly late in the year, but the

(12:45):
listeners love it. It's one of the most requested
sound files at kevinandbean.com.People want to put it on their
phones. They want it to in their, you
know, when they get a text. And it's our own Miss Cleo.
Clock is it. Clocks a clock with the clock
and it's those and similar. To.

(13:09):
Clock. This Cleo was trying to play a
game where she was getting somebody to come up with the
title of a song and she just froze.
It's one of those that you get as much joy the 10th time as you
did the first time hearing it. It is the Christmas gift that
keeps on giving. Yes, all right, we're at the top
of the mountain now. The number one most popular
sound bite of the Kevin and BeanShow for 2000.

(13:32):
I know. I mean, it doesn't The clocks.
There's some great stuff on thislist, but only one could be #1
and it again, is a very recent clip.
But I have a feeling that we're not just playing it now because
of the Tiger Woods story. Is it?
Is it? What's that again?
My favorite? I think we'll be playing his
mother-in-law on the 911 tape forever.

(13:54):
What happened? I mean, how many times in your
life do you walk into a situation and the only
appropriate question is? What happened?
So ladies and gentlemen, there it is, number one top 10 sound
bites of 2009. You can see all at
kevinandbean.com. Great year for sound drops.
Oh yeah, Speaking of recent sound drops, I have Eddie Pence

(14:18):
to think for me constantly just going why is it wet?
Why is it wet? All right, next one.
That was a good one. If we do the top ten haze of
2009, that one might even make it.
It's one O 6.7 KROQ. In fact, the world famous K

(14:40):
rock. At 8:40 you are listening to the
Kevin and Bean show. We are looking back on the year
almost passed the year of 2009. Next hour, by the way, we'll be
counting down the top 10 sound bites of 2009.
Will the FBI make the list? You can help decide.
Go to Kevin and beat dot Gob. Vote for that one and cast your
vote. We'll find out in less than an
hour what the top 10 sound bitesare for this show for 2009.

(15:03):
All right, in the recap department, Psycho Mike, you are
leading the next one. You are the keeper of the
moments with What do we need to know top ten moments with of
2009? We're going to start off the
list with Bean. At the very beginning of the
year, we had Mr. Tom Morello in here and Bean just fails trying
to ask him a question. And now a moment with Bean.

(15:24):
You I can't believe I totally forgot.
I had a really good question A long time since we've had one of
these happen, but I totally forgot.
Wow, that was a moment with being here.
Here's as in the words of Santa Carl here my whole thing.
Most people, they have a brain fart like that and it's gone and
they're never reminded of it again.
Everything we say is on a microphone and saved forever.

(15:46):
And boy do they come back to haunt you because it happens to
everybody. And you're thinking that'd be
motivation to not suck. Yes, you would think so.
You would think so. Here's another appearance by
being at #9 He tries to go with the common figure speech and
again just fails. And now a moment with I've given
all of these topics a lot of thought.
Yeah, I'm not coming in. I'm just talking off the hip

(16:07):
here, man. Or from the hip or wherever the
hitting from the hip. Yeah, you should.
Be talking off the. Top of your.
Hip pick one of the. Just talking from the hip here.
That was a moment with remember that Kali and Kevin's voice by
the way, when he realizes Kevin that the bean has screwed up as

(16:29):
badly as he usually does. Well, I'd like to point out
we're doing the top ten moments with which fails on this show
for the year so far. It's 100% beat.
So what's up with that? Stop sucking.
Here comes Kevin, here comes Kevin.
We were talking to a local weathercaster here in in LA.
His name is Doug Kriegel, and often Ralph will portray him and
and we'll talk to him about the rain here in Los Angeles.

(16:49):
And Kevin would like to say goodbye to Doug.
And it doesn't work out so well.And now it's time for a moment
with Kevin. All right, well, good reporting,
Craig. Craig, Doug, thank you, Steve.
That was a moment with. Kevin, that's.

(17:10):
Interesting, the audio on these a little low, very low.
Yeah. Can we boost that up a little
bit? Mike's not paying attention.
All right, we're up to what #7 now this is #7 Kevin is trying
to solicit for our very popular Miss Double D show, and he
cannot do that so well. And now it's time for a moment

(17:31):
with Kevin. Miss Double, Miss Double
December comes. What just happened?
What just happened? That was a moment with Captain.
Yeah, sure was. That's classic #6 Lisa May often
has to do advertisements in her traffic.

(17:51):
And those are very important because our advertisers, you
know, help pay for the radio station.
So it's, it's good that Lisa totally screws this one up.
And now a moment with Lisa May. Super Lotto plus or Mega
Millions plays and enter into a bogus straw I'm bonus straw.
That was a moment with Lisa May.It's you calling the lottery

(18:12):
bogus. Oh man, Holding's a sham.
I heard about that and. They're paying you to read that.
Come on. Top ten moments with on the
Kevin Abede show. We're up to #5 we made our way
to #5 Kevin screws up simple words.
So when he tries to go for long words, it's just it's a bad
scene. And now it's time for a moment
with Kevin. Well, she said she looked like

(18:35):
Ernest Borden 9. And that one is, remember,
that's fake self death for whatever.
Thank you. That was a moment with Kevin.
Wow, that's rough. I hope that future affiliates of
the Kevin and Bean Show are tuning in today to see how fine
this program is if they want to carry it out their station.
All right #4 earlier in the countdown, we heard Bean screw

(18:57):
up a common figure of speech. Now it's Kevin's turn, and now
it's time for a moment with Kevin.
I mean, if they start smelling money in the water, they're
going to start coming out of thewoodwork.
That was a moment, yeah, you know, that just happened very,
very recently. That was us talking about the
Tiger Woods story, the show biz beat with Ralph.

(19:18):
And here's how. Here's how inured we are to the
moments with anymore. None of us in the room or in the
office even noticed that when itwas a Lister who tipped us off.
And once we went back and saw how spectacular it was, it ended
up at #4 on the list. This is just a plain old brain
fart from Ralph. I don't know.
I can't really explain what happened, but it's Ralph's first
appearance on the top Ten moments with of 2009.

(19:43):
And now a moment with Ralph. Hey, what?
That was just a sound. Just some sound, kind of it
wasn't the beginning of a word, no sense or thought, just a
sound. Wow.
That was a moment with Ralph. I think it's the onset of early
Tourette's. Hey, hey.

(20:06):
All right, I'm getting very nervous.
What's left if this is what didn't make #2 and #1 but
what's, what's the next clip? Up number 2 is Kevin, and he
comes out of a song to give the name and numbers of our radio
station and doesn't do so well. And now it's time for a moment
with Kevin. 1O21O2 Wow 102. Do you know something we don't

(20:32):
know? No. 11 that one, a moment with
captain, that's the best. All right #1 there's a lot of
competition for this one. The number one moment with, I
mean this is like honestly, whenyou start thinking about the
number one moment with of the year, it's just like American
Idol. There are hundreds of thousands
competing to be #1 every year, but there could only be 1

(20:54):
champion. I'm terrified that it's going to
be me being you do take home thetrophy.
Really the moment with of 2009. Ralph was doing a voice bit
where he was portraying a Japanese girl.
I don't remember this voice bit,but it was about four or five
months ago from the from the date of the of the audio that I
pulled and you went to introduceher to the audience and I cannot

(21:15):
wrap my head around how much youscrewed.
I don't remember this at all. And now a moment with being
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome for the first time on
the Kevin to Bean show. And I hope that with many other
appearances, Miyuku Hata, Yoma yama.
There's no way I said that, right?
Hello. How are you?

(21:35):
Wait, who was that? That was worst intro ever.
That's terrible. Hello, how are you?

(21:56):
It's funny, yet also very, very sad.
See what you do for a living. I know we got an instant request
still to come. Plus, the top 10 sound bites of
2009 as the Kevin Abede show continues right after this.
Love it. Yeah, the top tens were fun.
Sprinkle some more of those throughout the year and that's

(22:17):
it for the flashback that needs no introduction.
Oh, I have a fun fact. I can do a fun fact.
Fun fact, Rapunzel syndrome is arare condition that occurs when
a large hairball gets lodged in the stomach and stretches to the
small intestine. An example of this happened in
2010 when surgeons removed a 1.6meter long hair strand from a

(22:41):
patient's gut. Josh from Hawthorne.
Wait, is that for a cat or a human?
Probably human. Yeah, I would imagine human, but
I couldn't imagine anything thatlong coming out of my butt.

(23:02):
Never heard of a human with a hairball though.
But wouldn't your stomach acid digest it or break it down?
No, not hair. There's actually a condition
where people eat their hair. And yeah, they'd sometimes will
have to get surgery for it. Weird hairs.
Resilient. Yeah.

(23:23):
All right, podcast roundup. Let's go.
Oh golly Gee, willikers. Nailed it when you.
Want her to put out your podcast?

(23:48):
Welcome to TikTok. Welcome to the podcast Roundup.
It is not TikTok. It is the Roundup.
Let's go ahead and start off with the Frank and Friends show.
He would brought up a bean and the earthquake FOMO.
Are you afraid or of earthquakesby any chance I mean.
I've never experienced. One, it's not relevant.

(24:10):
It's not. Relevant.
Yes. I don't know what to expect in
one. Apparently there's some people
they would have FOMO if they missed a major earthquake.
That's interesting. And I had to even text Bean and
say how by strange coincidence, in the 10 years that I lived in
Los Angeles, they were really technically 3 earthquakes with
two of them are on the same day.And maybe two years later was

(24:31):
another big one, the Northridge earthquake.
I was out of town for both of them.
OK, so I missed out and it was sort of a strange thing.
By coincidence, I had flown backto Northern Virginia to visit
family. Missed the 92 earthquake and
then missed again the 94 earthquake.
Did you feel like you missed outI.
Didn't want to be in the earthquake part, especially

(24:52):
considering there was significant damage in other
people's neighborhoods. We got back to our house and we
looked through the entire house trying to find anything that was
damaged. The only thing that broke was
this little leprechaun of did a header off the mantle and broke
on the bricks. Was the only thing interesting I
mean, and there were, I mean a. Couple of blocks from my house,
there are parking garages that have collapsed and pancaked the

(25:15):
cars. Crazy.
Mainly think I'm not really. I don't miss living out West.
I don't miss earthquakes. I don't, you know, I wouldn't
want to. Yeah, I don't think I really
want to. the Hurricanes and the Tornadoes are bad enough.
Yeah. So Frank doesn't have FOMO for
earthquakes but kind of does cuzhe missed the big ones.
Cool story. Right.

(25:40):
But yeah, so Frank wasn't there for the earthquakes, didn't
experience any of them, but stuff happened and a leprechaun
lost its life. Anyhow, let's go over to Not
Today. I was just curious who has a
leprechaun on their mantle? That's pretty interesting.
Only Frank, the most interestingman in the world.
Exactly, I don't know why you would have a leprechaun in your

(26:01):
on your mantle. Is it like elf on the shelf but
like for whiskey or something? I don't.
Know maybe a trooper on the pooper.
Now that Christopher will have. All right, let's go over to Not
Today and Jen Sturcher is not ready to be a MILF.

(26:24):
This happened to me at HalloweenHorror nights in Florida when I
was there with my girlfriends. We were in line and these guys,
these children I should say we're like Sup ladies.
So we celebrate MILF Mondays andI was like well it's a Friday so
should probably check your calendar but also fuck you.

(26:46):
MILF. Mondays MILF Mondays.
What's up ladies Friday. And these older gentlemen were
behind us in line and overheard these kids trying to holler at
us. And I looked over at them and I
was like, did you guys just watch my life leave my body?
I was like, I was. So I was like, I've just never.
Did you see reality come crashing into me?

(27:09):
Did you just witness that? Eddie, it hurt my soul so much.
And look, they were still telling me at the end of the day
I was hot, but it was still It'sold.
Hot. It's old.
Hot. It's MILF hot.
I don't like it. I'm not somebody's mom yet.
I thought that was hilarious because she's like in her 40s
now. She's like 42 I think.

(27:30):
Jen, you want to know what a MILF is?
Someone 42 saying they're mad atgetting old, I'm going to lose
it. Well, I think it's just a a
stage. I mean, everybody goes through
different things and I guess forwomen being turning into a MILF
is kind of a, a certain stage I guess.

(27:50):
I don't, I don't know, I I get again hooked up with somebody
who's 10 years younger than me. I can't seem to stay away from
the young UNS. You know nothing wrong with
that. I don't.
Think so? It's because you say young UNS.
Who could resist that? But the other part of that story

(28:11):
that I thought was interesting is that there was some older
guys next to them. So I think this is a con and it
gives me an idea. I got older kids.
I mean, I got boys that are in their 20s.
We can go somewhere, have them say those stupid things like,
you know, I have MILF Mondays and then I'm in, right?
That's my line. That's my line.
That's this. They're my wingman.
Yes, it is. I think that works.

(28:31):
Instead of wingman, you got wingkids, Yeah.
Put them to work. It'll kind of like have a
problem when I take them when I when I drive them home
afterwards, but it'll work out some way.
That's all right all right, let's go over to the Ralph
report. Everybody's talking to you
merch. Ralph has a new merch idea.

(28:52):
You guys remember L Sistine? Yes.
He he recommends this when you're drinking heavily because
you won't get a hangover if you take L Sistine beforehand.
Dean Margaritas, you're welcome for the L Sistine.
I too have been dipping into it this holiday season and it is a
life changer. It is.
It's a it's a game saver. No, it's a game changer, game

(29:15):
changer and a lifesaver. And there's every possibility
that the Ralph Report is going to be marketing its own L sisty
next year. What?
Yeah. Wow.
Look at that. Would you feel comfortable
ordering supplements from The Ralph Report?
Well, that's how every great podcast goes, right?
That's all the good ones. Let me tell you that what we're

(29:36):
going to do. We're going to tell you I got
some great supplements. You're going to love it.
It's going to be great. So Ralph report L cysteine
coming in 2025. It's only natural we go down
that with her. I agree, yes.
I think it should come with our own alcohol too, like the whole
kit. It's like from start to finish.
Sure, we should have Ralph report bourbon and we should

(29:57):
have L cysteine and shot glass. Everything you need vaccines.
We'll have our own vaccines. If you don't want polio, listen
to the Ralph report. I thought the polio joke at the
end was was a nice Topper, but Ican't.
Yeah, that's a great idea. If they start selling El Sistine
with bourbon, the Duke of Bourbon, bourbon and and the

(30:20):
shot glasses, I think it'll work.
I'll get some Ralph report. Duke of Bourbon Bourbon.
I would totally do it. Look at all the other
celebrities that have their own gin or vodkas or whatever.
They're coming for me for moon shining.
I'm not selling it, I swear to God.
Is this because Eddie had the idea to sell quitters?

(30:42):
Never give up crack cocaine. Maybe.
All right, let's see here. Let's go.
Oh, Speaking of the Seth MacFarlane party, Ralph was at
that party and they had open bars and so he was talking about
tipping and Eddie had to kind ofget involved.

(31:02):
Conclusion was. But they stiffed.
Them. I bet you they did.
Well, they tipped them in other ways, yeah.
They could. Showed their boobies.
Here you go, Mr. Bartender. God, what sound was?
That you know what it was You know what it was?
Nobody's licking boobies across the bar at a Christmas party.
You're. Free sucking them up.
You got them a straw on one of. Them suck on them titties stop

(31:25):
being you just for a while. Yeah, I don't recommend that.
That's that's not going to work out.
Superman trailer was playing came out and they discussed it
on the Ralph Report. Well, the reviews are in from
the Superman trailer that dropped yesterday morning and
everyone seems to be almost unanimous in that they they're

(31:50):
looking forward to the film. I'm looking forward to it.
I'm definitely looking forward. I think it looks great.
I am. I was super pleased with it.
Genius of James Gunn. By the way, to start the thing
off, this isn't a spoiler, but the very beginning of the
trailer you see Superman, a battle worn Superman beat up,
crash landing in the Arctic, andhe looks like hell.

(32:10):
And I think it's smart to show people that there are stakes in
this film and he's not going to be invulnerable and he's going
to be flying around. Everything's going to be okie
doke. I think that really is a good
way of gripping it. And you saw all the big players
you saw. Of course Lois Lane was in
there. Jimmy Olsen was in there.
Lex Luthor, Lex Luthor, Crypto, the Super dog.
Oh my God, Crypto. Crypto looks so much like a

(32:32):
Kelsey brother. I think he may be the lost
Kelsey brother. I think you have a Halloween
costume for next year. I think we do.
The Kelsey brother that he's referring to is their two dogs.
They have two new dogs that lookkind of like Crypto from the
Superman trailer. Did you guys watch the Superman
trailer? Well, you sent it to me, so yes,
I watched. It Yeah, I, I pulled a Kevin

(32:54):
Smith. I kind of actually cried during
this trailer. I don't know why.
That's just like Superman's back.
Who's playing Superman? Ornsworth something, something
somebody new. Yeah, kind of somebody.
Never really heard of who's playing Eddie.

(33:15):
Ornsworth, of course. That yeah, that is what you
said. Cornelius.
From Oh right, this is going to be a 10 year podcast.
Who's Lois Lane? That's the important thing.
The girl from woman from fuck? What was that show?

(33:36):
Oh, that show. The one where she's a comedian.
Misses Menzel. Marvelous Miss Menzel.
Missel Menzel. Idina Menzel.
Maisel. Maisel.
Marvelous misses. OK, does that help?
Does that really help? Yeah, I mean that's in.

(33:58):
I've got a David Cornswett who'sSuperman.
Rachel Brosnahan is Lois Lane. Lex Luthor is Nicholas Holt,
which I've never heard of. He's the guy, that and then
Beast. Yeah, and the other names in
here, I don't even the characternames, I don't know so.

(34:20):
Well, it's got Lex Luthor, it's got Mr. Terrific, it's got Hot
Girl. Yeah, but it doesn't have Zod.
That's gotta be Part 2 Neil before Zod I.
Hope so climbers going on. Last.
Game of the year, Brent. Can't hold anything back now I.

(34:42):
Know All right, Next we have Eddie Pence's Christmas
problems. Because over the years of having
a child, yeah, My wife and I, Tracy, we have, we've
accumulated this list of Christmas movies that we watch
every year before Christmas. Sure, everybody does.
And it's every year more movies get added to the list.
And so it becomes a longer viewing schedule.

(35:03):
And now we're trying to cram in all these movies within the next
week and a half. And it's getting stressful to
try to see every single one of these movies.
Wow. Your life.
It's a lot. You got some big problems.
Huge problems. You have to watch so many
Christmas movies. Well, just pick a day and just
binge. We've been we've been doing 6:00
AM and then just work your way through till midnight.

(35:23):
Just do power through it all three Santa Clauses, then then
the seat, the streaming show andthen we got a Jingle all the
way. We got a lot lot to do.
Well, I'm sorry to hear about the all your movie problems.
I'll keep you updated. I thought the way we sure hope
you kids get that figured out because maybe we can start a
GoFundMe or something for you guys that would be helpful to
buy some more screens. So you could have 3 or 4 movies
going at the same time. I could have 3 movies going at a

(35:45):
time. We can knock this out in two or
three days. My heart goes out to Eddie, you
know, having a wife and family, you know, not being divorced or
nothing, just having all those problems.
I'm waiting. I can't wait for the GoFundMe to
contribute. So what Christmas movies or

(36:05):
holiday movies do you guys watchevery year?
Definitely ELF. Yeah, but Christmas Carol.
Oh. Nice, I like the Mystery Science
theater ones. There's one Santa Claus Cocker's
The Martians. It's a legendarily bad movie, so
I watched that one. Nice.
Yeah, I always like the old Franken.

(36:26):
What is it? Rankin and Bess?
Rankin and Bess. Yeah, those are really good.
Yeah. Those are my favorite.
I should buy them because I justcounted on them just coming out
every year and then now they're nowhere to be found.
So I need to figure out how to get them.
But I don't have a DVD player anymore, so I'm gonna have to
maybe buy them from Amazon. I guess.
I don't know. What do you think, Lindsay?

(36:47):
Do you like those? I think Alzheimer's crisis is
doing great. But do you like the Rankin and
Bass 2D animation or their stop motion animation?
Well, the stop motion is classic.
That's the one you have to go with.
But they did have Frosty was pretty good.

(37:07):
That's the 12D animation that they did have.
It was pretty. I like that one.
Well. I like a year without a Santa
Claus because of Mr. White Christmas and Mr. Heat Miser.
That's right, the opening for Palpatina chat was a little
weird this week. Hey now.
Hey. Excuse me, what happened there?

(37:30):
What happened there? No, that is not how a young lady
behaves. Oh my God, I'm so sorry I.
Will send you to your room. There's no way to start a show.
Ally, what are you doing? I think we need to incorporate
that in our show. Lindsay, give us a nice burp.

(37:58):
Excellent. All right.
Does everybody remember Ally's parents napping?
Oh yeah. Like it came up, but not as not
with somebody that was related to the Kevin and Bean show.
How did it even come up? I don't even know.
I got an e-mail from my parents during lunch and I said, oh, my
parents are taking a nap and Valerie goes what?

(38:20):
And I said they just e-mail whenthey take a nap and she goes,
you know, that means they're fucking right.
And I said Valerie. She knew that too.
I. Said, no, it doesn't.
And this became a huge conversation on Kevin and Bean.
That's not what it means. Not what it means.
That's oh. It's we're just letting you
know, don't call for the next hour because I put in work.

(38:43):
Yes, No, can't answer the phone.Her hands and mouth are busy.
That's what is the e-mail. We get it.
It. Makes sense to me.
I don't know why ally's in denial.
It's obvious that that's what's going.
On right. There's a couple of calls from

(39:05):
people in the group, so I have to kind of pre empt my phone
call with the conversation that they had.
Ali brought up the show. Alice Lindsay.
Do you know what Alice is? Alice in Wonderland.
No, all of us holds it laughing like we know something special.
But Alice was a show in the 70s and in the 70s, eighties,

(39:26):
everybody had a catch phrase, and so she brought up the catch
phrase from Alice. At some point there's going to
be people that when you meet someone named Florence who goes
by Flow, they're not going to know what I mean when I say kiss
my grits. That's troubling to me.
Good. Example.
Eight people were like Alice Fan.
Yeah, good times. I told you when I got in trouble

(39:48):
at recess, I was going out to recess and our table was the
last to to get released for recess.
And I told my teacher to kiss mygrits and she called my mom.
Well, because that's dangerous language coming out of a
toddler's mouth, right I. Mean it made sense to me.
I had no idea Grits as Flo was saying it.
That meant her boobies, right? Oh, does it now?

(40:10):
Doesn't it kiss my grits I. Didn't think it was assigned to
any particular body part. I think it was just another way
of saying up yours or whatever. OK, but.
Yeah, maybe. Maybe it was.
Why did I always think it was boobs after that I don't.
Know. Could have been.
I don't know. I don't know.
I feel like that was a tangent we didn't need.
Or was it? I think.
I think that was a valuable tangent.

(40:31):
Well I don't know why she thought it meant kiss my tits.
Oh I guess that's why. Cuz it said grits and tits.
Tits right? I don't know, probably a.
Yeah, it's just grits, you know?Ally, she got so excited about
this. Ally calm your grits.

(40:53):
You need to call call that one in.
Yep. OK, so this prompted calls to
come in and listen to this smooth voice, gentlemen.
Apparently we are the Alice TV show podcast of record.
Here's a call about a recent conversation that we had where
you brought up Alice. Hey Ali and Bean, it's Teabagger
Christopher and also fellow Alice fan.

(41:14):
I always thought kiss my grits was a euphemism for kiss my ass,
but that was just me. It made sense to me as a kid,
makes sense to me now. Anyhow, keep up the work and
kiss my grits. Did you hear from anybody else
who was helping you interpret what Kiss My Grits meant when
Alice said it back in the day? Everybody basically said it's
ass. It is ass.
You were thinking boobs, right? I was just thinking boobs

(41:35):
because I guess as a little kid I was thinking plural grits was
plural, but not right. Grits, obviously not plural
grits is just one thing. Listen, I was a very smart
child, sure. What happened?
Not sure. I think she had boobs in the
mind because of who the Helen? I think that's what it was.

(41:57):
Oh, that makes sense, yeah. I will say in the 70s all you
needed was a really dumb catch phrase.
Remember, welcome back Kotter. It was up your nose with a
rubber hose. Happy days, we'll sit on it.
Yeah. What's he talking about?
Yeah, I'm going to put in. I have to find the clip.
What I do with the clip. I didn't save it.
Oh, my God. Disaster struck.

(42:18):
I have. I have a clip of her mentioning
Edwin. Edwin, do you have that clip?
No, I don't have it. Damn it.
I'll put it in a post. Put it in a post, but she brings
up Edwin when she brings up Hooter Helen and it's pretty.
That's right, yes. Yeah, it's very interesting.
Edwin was excited. He's still excited.

(42:39):
He's turgid, I think. Let's move on before murder
button from Lindsay. Last one, Luke got a call in.
It's for Scrabble. Ali and beating what up?
It's Luke from Boulder here. You know how sometimes you guys
are doing a story and you complain about how the person
writing the story or the interviewer didn't ask all the

(43:01):
questions that you would have asked?
Well, that happened to me recently when I was listening to
a certain podcast that I listened to on Tuesdays,
Thursdays, and Saturdays. And I'm going to play a little
clip for you here, and then I'llcome back at you and it'll be
clear when the clip ends. Here goes.
So can he speak these languages?No, he just knows words.
He just, he doesn't even know what they mean.

(43:22):
But he doesn't need to, because he's playing Scrabble all He
doesn't. Know what they mean?
Because it's literally the definition of these words.
Yeah, Hey, it's Luke. I'm back.
So you guys were talking about aguy who plays Scrabble and he
plays it in languages that he doesn't speak or no what?
How does Scrabble work over at Ally's house?
You define all the words you actually like taking all the

(43:43):
letters and like defining out what the word is on the board.
Ally. It's just, it's just Scrabble.
You just play the words and if you have the letters and they
make up a full word, that's Scrabble.
I need more information. Luke.
How is this game played over in Maine for asking?
Your turn you can play the game however you want.
I play it in a way that I I I need you to define the word, use

(44:08):
it in a sentence, and do. We have to give you the country
of origin too. If that if that helps, yes.
OK. I don't know.
I don't know where that came from, Luke.
I retract it. And which means take back.
Oh, take back and say that. OK, I understand.
Yeah, that I don't what? I love that he brought his

(44:28):
receipts though. I love that he.
And it sounds better edited thanour show.
So Congrats, Luke, Could you possibly produce our show?
Thank you. Great idea, Could you replace me
is a better question by. Not true.
Luke and Ally, 2025 USAUSA. So once again, Luke has to, you
know, one up me, get his call inand then get a job offer.

(44:52):
Well, that was the podcast roundup.
It went long, but you know. Last game of the year.
Brent can't hold anything back now, so.
Ally, what do you think of the show?
This one seems pretty solid to me.
I am not pooping on this. Thanks.
That's good. Ralph, what do you think?
Just garbage garbage. Yeah, I love dividing the

(45:16):
country. That's just me, anyhow.
Edwin take over. Press the button, my friend.
Send me back into time. Edwin.
No, Edwin. Oh, I'm sorry.
It's a new day. Our feature presentation.
Come back to 2013 for you to getback in the DeLorean and get to

(45:38):
88 mph. It's an homage, The tribute.
Yeah. Yes, we're doing an homage to
the old Kevin and being show we're not just ripping it off.
So we're doing the week that wasDecember 16 to 18/20/13.

(45:58):
It was a short week for the guys.
Kevin was out of town and I can hear any Kevin here.
Oh wait, we got a call. Which is weird because we just
installed the phone line. Is this how we're going to be
great or unlistable? Well, we'll see.
Bean. This is the last days of the
Kevin Abean Show from 2013. They're doing Top 10s top 10

(46:20):
beer mug interview moments interview.
Moments, Interview moments. Interview moments.
It's outrageous when your mug's on the case, you'll stick it
like you're phone and you're famous questions.
He's got none. He just feels that is awesome.

(46:41):
And when you think that is it, he says that's fantastic.
Oh no, I mean he's got to talk here.
Like interview moments. Let's go.
So that's the intro. Really good stuff from Omar.
Again, what I did is got the final two, number two and one
for the year. These are ones that I remembered

(47:03):
even years later. Another classic beer mug moment
from the same MTVVMAS in New York City as he sees Oscar
winner Jennifer Hudson nearby and he decides he's got to get
her over. Jay Hutz, Jay Hutz guys sing a
song for you. Jay Hutz, Jay Hutz, Jay Hutz Jay
Hutz. I wonder why she didn't come

(47:25):
over. How could she not come over?
That's your your, your supple voice there just beckoning to
her like a siren to a sailor. And how does Jennifer Hudson
become J huts, by the way, is the other question that we we
often had. All right.
Well, I think it's I think it's clear.
Beer mug is on a roll for 2013. Here's his number one moment.

(47:47):
And again, how could this personnot have wanted to talk to him
on the red carpet? Anyone want to guess 2013 bear
mug? Lena.
Radio good, good catch. Selena, Miss Coleman, Selena,
God damn it, ladies and gentlemen, he's still got it.

(48:09):
He's still got it. Hail beer mug 10 Top beer mug In
a few moments, it's. Outrageous.
A more top 10 fun this was. Thanks for that tweet Bean.
I need today to be a cashew day.I've had too many Brazil nut
days this week. Come on Saturday, let's do this.

(48:33):
Yeah, that should be #1. That will only say you think
until you get to #1 they'll say,Oh my God, I've got a lot of
very memorable one. I got a lot of traction on my
nut scale with followers of my Twitter account at Clyde Tubman.
I just want you to doubt. Yeah, I remember that.
Cashews are a good nut. That's a quality nut.
Do you guys have a scale that's kind of unusual, unique to

(48:55):
yourselves? No.
No, OK, I got like my my Snappleday.
If it's a Peach day, a Peach Snapple day, that's a really
good day. Lemon.
Not as good. OK, we're going to move on.
This was a very good day. This was 12/18/13.

(49:16):
Kevin. Like I said, Kevin's gone.
Here's who came on the show. Steve Carell, Joe Rogan, Jimmy
Kimmel, Bobcat Goldthwait all came on the show.
Fantastic show. Look it up in the archives.
Throw a little something to to Kevin Stockdale for the great
archives. So let's start Jimmy Kimmel.
He relives a little bit of the old Kevin of being history and a

(49:38):
story. We just talked to Big Tad about
when being got stuck in his pickup truck.
But this was the worst time of the year for me, Christmas time,
because we always had the Christmas cassette, which was a
huge, huge pain in my ass. And Jimmy, for folks who don't
remember, Jimmy did the bulk of the work on the Kevin of being
Christmas albums. I mean, I'd say 90% of the

(50:00):
writing and organizing and recording was was Jimmy.
So yeah, it was a huge pain in the ass for you.
It's funny, I wonder how many people realize I even worked
here at there probably are people that don't know that, but
and so I did that and also the best of well, you guys were
preparing for vacations. You had to do the best.
Stuff yeah when I came in I was like your best of is it sounds

(50:22):
terrible. It's the worst.
It's actually not the best of soI went through all the tapes.
In fact, that's where I discovered the Armenian comedian
on one of your old like best of tapes unbelievable the stuff
that you remember Jim unbelievable.
I remember being getting trappedin his truck I.
Remember that. Which was, I don't think you
could ever do it justice by explaining it, but how long were

(50:44):
you being tried to crawl in the the window, You know, the kind
of window of his truck to, of Tad's truck.
This was Tad's truck. That's a truck.
That's right. Tad's truck.
Well, Tad had like this was wow,we're going back a ways here.
Back when Jimmy was on the show,we used to put out a holiday
album every year. We used to do these signings.
We'd show up. And at the time, mostly it was
like at Warehouse records. Yeah, a warehouse in like La
Brea or something. Right.

(51:05):
So we showed up and Tad, big dumb Tad picture beer mug plus
200 lbs. To give a reference to people
who weren't listening back when Tad was on the show, he locked
his keys in his truck and I saidhey, no problem, I've got long
arms, I'll help you out. So I'm trying to do Tad a favor.
So I climbed through the tiny little window in the cab of his
truck to try to reach the keys, and I got stuck in there and

(51:26):
stuck like sitcom stuck like your big ass in shorts.
I did not get out for like 45 minutes or so.
How did we ever get you out of there?
Somehow they figured out a way to get the window out of the
truck. So then I was able to step back.
And then I'm standing in the parking lot with the window
literally around my body. I had to shimmy out of it.
But what's amazing, and I don't.I can't imagine what year that

(51:49):
might have been, Jim. It must have been mid 90s,
right? Yeah, for sure.
Mid 90s. So I don't think we were quite
at everyone has a camera on their smartphone.
No, we weren't. And that's why, that's why there
is not a single photo of that. If we had a camera there, I
definitely would have raped you.God, I mean, just for posterity

(52:09):
sake, how is it that Tad is still working for you at the
Jimmy Kimmel Live? Not working for you That's come
on, how do you the real questionyou have a professional job for
a major American television network where there's a lot of
responsibility where you have people like like superstars
walking the halls to see you each night.

(52:31):
The keyword there is American and there is no one more
American than Tad. He lays around in his bed eating
chips, asking his mother to makehim food.
He posts on Facebook all day about how excited he is that the
Mcrib is back. This is the spirit of America
embodied in one enormous little boy as I still What does that?

(52:53):
What does that do for you on Jimmy Kimmel Live?
Tad is a security guard, so he'sjust muscle.
Well, I have to not. Really.
He's not muscle. He's a combination of different
tissues. Yeah, he could.
Sit on you. One thing about TAD and I really
thought about this and I thoughtabout it seriously.
I thought TAD is the only only one of our security guards that

(53:14):
would take a actually take a bullet for me.
Well, there's something to be said for that.
So I think I'm as more more of ahuman shield than a friend.
But Jimmy, here's what I here's what I don't understand about
you. I get the yucks of being in
radio and having a doofus like Tad and how that's entertaining
to you for a minute. But now you're Jimmy Kimmel, OK?
And now you're vacationing with Jennifer Aniston and your best

(53:37):
friends with Howard Stern, and you've got all these actual,
like friends. Yeah.
How do you have time in your your life to think about what
tads doing? Like how are you?
How do you literally have the time to follow what's going on
on today's Facebook page? I make the time being.
I make the time. It's called keeping it real.
Maybe you've heard of it. It's just it's astonishing to me

(53:59):
when you, when you fall in love with something, you fall in love
hard and you fall in love forever.
Yeah. It never really goes away.
And I'll say my uncle Andy, who's an uncle that I don't see
that much, when we did the show in New York last year, was kind
of observing what was going on. And he's looking at me and he
goes, you know, I think I figured something out.
You like to surround yourself with people that are a little

(54:19):
screwy. Speaking of that, give me, on a
scale of one to 10, your level of surprise that Doc on The Rock
is still doing news on the KevinAbean show?
I was just talking to Ralph about this.
I'm not surprised that Doc is still doing news.
I mean, I'm surprised by the way.
That's so funny. Give me that lecture about Tad
and I see Doc in the hall, but Doc is exactly the same as he

(54:43):
was. I mean, I think he's the same
age as he was. He doesn't look any different.
He looks, he looks a little bit younger than when I was here.
And he said to Ralph was like, how old is Doc now?
And he's like, like, you know, his 60s.
I was like, wasn't he in his 60swhen in the 90s when I was here?
I mean, it's, it's something's going on with him and he should

(55:04):
be examined. There is something about the
long time K rockers and rotting on the rock comes to mind too.
As somebody, if you saw a photo of him, you couldn't tell if it
was taken in 2013 or 1965. But there was something weird
about those people. It's not just them.
Lisa looks exactly the same, actually better than she did.
And you and Kevin, somehow I don't what?

(55:24):
What is going on here? Something weird.
And the water. And I'll tell you another thing,
I There's nothing that interestsme more than driving over and
hearing Bean have an extended conversation with Joe Rogan
about the UFC. It's like you can't possibly
have any interest in the UFC andyet you know all the guys in it

(55:46):
and you know what's going on with it.
It's like hearing C3PO talk about sex.
What relationship? UFC has become very popular.
I am aware of that alien who's observing us and taking a lot of
notes, but there's no possible way you're watching.
Are you paying for that? Do you rent?
You get that pay-per-view at your farm or wherever the hell

(56:08):
you're moving to now. I like to stay courage.
Can you imagine being watching the UFC fight?
Does not compute as being might say.
OK, Next up is Bobcat Goldthwait.
He came on the show. I had kind of forgotten this.
He directed an episode of Marin's old TV show with some

(56:31):
DJs called Pete and the Pig. So they were trying to give
Bobcat some grief for that. Now, the Pete and the Pig
reference that Ralph is making, I think bears some explaining
for, you know, I thought we werejust gonna skate around that.
I don't even think we're gonna bring that up.
But I, I direct, I'm one of the directors over on the Marc Maron
show, the Maron program on IFC, and I love that show.

(56:54):
Very funny. Well, I don't know how long
you're gonna love it, but alright, tell me why Bob 'cause
I'm a little bit nervous. Just answer what Ralph has told
her. There's a a a morning team that
gets kind of made fun of perhapson the show and there is one of
the part of the team lives in Seattle and does the show

(57:15):
remote. But yes, it has nothing to do
with you Beam. There's no connection.
These two like 2 guys do not like each other.
One does the show in Los Angeles, the other one does it
remotely from Seattle. Come on.
I'm kind of drunk. Pete and the pig.
Now listen, and but, you know, can I?
I'm about to throw Ralph under the bus.
Come on. Just before we did, I go, hey,

(57:36):
man, you want to change this? You know, you got to work with
the guy. You know, I I could change it.
We could change it. And he's like, no, let's do
this. All right, now, hold on.
I need some. I need some explanation here.
I need I need a heads up before this thing hits the air.
Ralph, are you playing Kevin or are you playing Bean in this
imaginary scenario? Well, neither.
I mean, I'm an actor. I created my whole character,

(57:58):
you know, my own character out of whole cloth Neither.
But I'll have you know that Peteis the one who works in Los
Angeles and the pig is the one who works from Seattle.
So I guess your again, and I'm Pete.
I'm Pete in Los Angeles. And again, your name is big, so
it couldn't possibly be you. No, your name's Bean.
So it has nothing to do with a pig.

(58:18):
No, it has nothing to do with a pig.
That you of course, own and lovepigs and live in.
Who plays me? Although Camel said that Bean's
the only person that wouldn't beinsulted being called the pig.
No, absolutely exact friends. They're very smart animals.
So why? Anyway, that's your question.
The magical Tom Kenny, the legendary voice over artist, of
course. SpongeBob and many other takes.

(58:40):
The clown. Hello.
That's where I know him best from.
Yeah, the other projects. So wait, he's the pig that
really hurt. Just that when he.
Said. Shakes the clouds like I'm
really going to shatter this relationship.
Why is why is Marin picking on us?
No, it's not. It's a it's an homage, right?
It's an homage. It's a tribute.

(59:01):
Yeah. You know, the only, the only
rib, like Super Diamond. Like Super Diamond loves Neil
Diamond so much that they they do a cover man.
Tom Kenny loves Bean. Loves Bean.
So Marion has to spend the morning with these morning DJs
and he's having a hard time. Why don't I ruin the episode of
you folks? But but it doesn't go well.

(59:22):
And also he's very confused because he can't see them, so I
wouldn't know what that would belike.
Yeah, I'm going to cut it a little bit short.
There was a fantastic segment and I went online and I found
the episode. I used to love the old Marin
show boy dark humor just right up my street.

(59:42):
So here's the clip of Marin being on the Pete and the Pig
Show. Am I going to see the pig's face
or what? No.
See. Where's that?
In the studio? No, they're not here.
They do the show remotely. What?
Yeah, they hate each other. Oh, the pig does it from his
home studio up in Seattle, and Pete is in Los Angeles.

(01:00:03):
I can't believe they're not bestfriends.
And now we're joined by comedianand podcaster Mark Marron, who
is at Uncle Morty's Ha Ha Cafe tonight.
Mark, welcome. We had Henry Cho in here last
week. Funny guy.
He's Asian, but he doesn't talk like one.
Yeah, that's that's exactly whatHenry Cho is.

(01:00:26):
Mark, can you give our porsters a taste of what they'll be
getting tonight? What do you want me to do?
Material. You want me to do bits.
Is that what you want me to do? Lay it on us, baby.
It is the pig talk. Oh, wow.
Tom Kenny, Ralph is in there. That's Ralph as Pete and Marin.

(01:00:51):
It was like a a fever dream thatI had.
But no, I really haven't. But.
What's the name of the show? He's just called Marin.
The Marc Maron Show. Oh, it's a Marc Maron.
OK, Thank you. It.
Used to be on IFC. I'm sure there's a lot of people
out there that thought it was Maron Dungy show.
Yeah. Nowadays, yeah.
So, yeah, you should look it up,people.

(01:01:12):
It's on Apple Plus, or you couldbuy it on Prime.
So I actually bought the episodebecause I wanted that clip so
bad. Very funny episode.
And that was the week that was in 2013.
Nice. What?
This was this year. No, Lisa, this was 2013.
I just said that. Oh, wait.
Lisa, what do you think of the ending?

(01:01:34):
I never would have guessed this ending.
I thought maybe Viagra and then a heart attack.
Oh, that's later. That's New Year's.
So back to you, Steve. Nice, I found the clip, let me
play it for you. Here's the thing, Edwin, I need
you to calm down. Her Hooters are fine.

(01:01:55):
Had nothing. Yeah, yeah.
Had nothing to do with her boobies.
They are fine. There you go, Edwin.
I was sweating bullets there fora while.
Oh, Edwin's never even seen thiswoman.
That's all I got to say. OK, before we say goodbye, I
just want to ask the folks that how did this get made, What they

(01:02:16):
thought of our show? Everybody looked not their best.
Do we want it because they were having explosive diarrhea?
Anybody want to say anything else that we have in liquid?
Fart blast. Yes, like hot wet dumps.
We gotta, we gotta do, we gotta do better, guys.
All right, Fancy. Say bye, bye.

(01:02:39):
Everyone. Hi, everybody.
Happy New Year. Is that all that you got to say
to me? Yeah.
Is that all you got to tell me? No, Mel, there's one more thing.
What? Kiss my grand?
I don't really want to shame myself.

(01:03:04):
Forever, I really think. I'm going to shame myself up
again. The only thing I do I go poo.
You got to promise. Not the fresh dinner I.
Say. You am because it's safe.

(01:03:40):
This right? You want the real deal?
That's what this is. Wake up.
You're in the middle of it. You want to run?
Go ahead. No one's stopping you.
Stop complaining. Santa doesn't come to little
Jewish children's houses. Santa Claus is coming.
What the What's? Going on here, Cut and cut and

(01:04:05):
abort, abort, cut. It's a wrap.
It's a wrap on this conversation, OK?
This has been a quitters never give up presentation.