February 10, 2025 • 47 mins
Helping Ordinary Women Build Extraordinary Businesses, Brands, and Lives They Love While Unpacking Their Inner SHEEO with Episodes Enriching Your Mindset, Wealth, and Faith Factor
VISIT: RachelMedina.com or SHEEOX.com
FOLLOW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @RachelMedina101
PLUS: Listen to founders and experts share their entrepreneurial journey on bonus episodes featuring awe inspiring guests
Rachel Medina is an Entrepreneur, TEDx Speaker, Christianpreneur, Mommypreneur and an ordinary woman who ditched the C-suite for the SHE-suite by tapping into the new and exciting laptop lifestyle in the SHEconemy, and who built multiple businesses from home, after divorce, as a single mother over 40!
The Rachel Unpacked Podcast is here to help you avoid common mistakes by learning the lessons she learned along the way! Whether you're a corporate baddie wanting to ditch the grind or a single momma ready to learn a new money making skillset from home, the Rachel Unpacked podcast is for you.
Access resources mentioned on this show here www.rachelmedina.com or at SHEEOX.com
As seen on: TEDx , The Christian Channel, LATV's Get It Girl, Rompiendo El Silencio, David Meltzer's Playbook IG-LIVE, StartEmpire Wire Podcast, Jackie Hernandez Live, Canvas Rebel Magazine, SDvoyager Magazine, Keynote Women's Leadership Conference, to name a few
RACHEL UNPACKED, RACHEL MEDINA, SHEEO, SHEEOx, SHE,EOO,OOO
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome to another episode of the Rachel Unpacked podcast.
I am your host Rachel Medina andin every episode we talk about
mindset, wealth, building and faith for every girlie who is
looking to change and level up her life.
If you want to follow me on social media, you can do so at
Rachel Medina 101 or visit my website rachelmedina.com.
But if you are ready to build a business in a life that you
(00:23):
love, head on over to our new she eox.com site again, She EO
dot com where you are going to find a tribe of like minded
business building dream aspiringgirl.
He's just like you, connecting, learning and growing together.
And a new CEO X partnership program means we attract the
(00:43):
talented, experienced and successful women who are ready
to teach you how they did it so that you can succeed too.
Let's go. Welcome, Kara Alwell.
Thank you, Rachel, I'm so excited to be here and I can't
believe we tried to do this. You said six or seven months
ago. I feel like I was a different
person back then so I am so excited to be back and be here.
(01:05):
Cara 2 point O, Rachel 2 point Omoving into the New Years
together. So I'm really excited.
Yes. OK, so I ask everybody, tell us
what you do, who you do it for, and what is unique about what
you do? Yeah, I mean, that's kind of a
loaded question, right? Because I feel like I've been
doing this for so long and I've evolved so much in my own brand
(01:27):
and mission. But at the core, what I really
do is help women own their voice, own their story, amplify
their voice, and really put themselves out there in a way
that they feel excited about, inspired by, proud of.
I'm an author first and foremost.
I've written 10 books and those books have been translated all
over the world, which is honestly, I feel like if I die
(01:49):
tomorrow, I could die feeling like my legacy like has been
made. And like I've chill saying that
because I think that not a lot of people get to experience
that. And I've worked really hard to
make that happen. And just knowing that I've been
able to touch one woman, let alone millions is just so wild
to me. And I'm so, so grateful.
But really what I do is just, you know, help women, whether
(02:09):
it's through helping them write books and tell their stories on
Sub Stack or self publish their own books through their
podcasts, or just, you know, really kind of enhance their
personal brands and get themselves out there.
That is my mission in the world and nothing makes me happier.
Who were you before all of this?Before all of this, I was a
(02:32):
little girl that always wanted to be a writer.
I always knew that I was going to publish books.
I thought that I was going to publish fiction books.
It's so funny. I did a project in school and it
was a book. It was called The Cat Who
Couldn't Fit In. And I made it out of like
construction paper and felt. And I wrote in about the author
page and it's my class picture from like whatever grade I was
in grade or something. And I wrote that I'm a
(02:54):
children's book author and with a degree in psychology and I was
a teacher, I think. And it's about the author, this
fantasy that I had. But I always knew like that that
was what I was going to do. I always knew that I was a
storyteller. I used to dress up in my
grandmother's clothes when I waslittle.
Like she always had these like Boas and wigs.
And I would just like say that Iwas this actress from Hollywood.
So I always knew that I wanted to tell stories, but my path
(03:17):
didn't take me on that road perfectly.
Like I always say, it's never linear, whether we're talking
business, life, love, it is never a straight path to where
you want to go. But I'm really fortunate for
that. My path took me down the
corporate road and I was in the music industry and I love music.
It's like my second love. It's like writing and music.
Those two, they're, they're really the same in so many ways,
(03:37):
but they were just always my 2 great loves.
And I wound up working in the music business for a while, went
on and worked at MTV. And the higher I climbed, I
don't know if you can relate to this or anyone listening kind,
the higher that I climbed in corporate, the further I got
away from my true soul and my true creativity, right?
Like it looks great on paper. The money was coming, the office
(03:59):
was there, the staff was there, and I was just like, who the
hell am I? Like I just don't feel like me
anymore. So, you know, around the time I
I was probably in my mid to late20s and I was in this corporate
job in MTV. I was advertising and I was just
so miserable. And I started a blog.
This is when blogging was first taking off 2000 and seven, 2008.
And I just said if I could just help one woman with this blog
(04:23):
just by telling my stories at the time I was dating somebody
that was all wrong for me as we do in our 20s trying to figure
it out and is X and the city wasa big show at the time.
And I was like, I kind of want to write for the Sex and the
City Girlies, but I don't want to talk about dating.
Like I want to talk about yourself and personal growth and
development. And that's really where the
Champagne Diet, that's my formerblog came from.
(04:45):
And then through that became, itbecame a book.
And then, you know, now 10 booksand a podcast and a coaching
practice. And it's just that's kind of
where I started. Isn't it amazing when we talk
about, we're trying to adjust myhair myself here in case you
guys hear anything weird, But when you talk about the
corporate part of it, I was in the magazine industry.
So you were in music. Obviously MTV is a big deal at
(05:08):
the time and magazines were sortof really glamorized at the time
as well. And it is, it was like that
feeling I, I, I that lands with me about the closer you got to
sort of achieving these things in corporate, the further away
you get from your actual true sort of calling or your essence.
Because I got to the point whereI was able to see, I climbed
very quickly. I remember being in Los Angeles
(05:30):
and thinking, this is like the pinnacle of besides New York,
you know, LA is like, here I am in this high rise and I get to
ride these elevators and there'sa few radio radio stations and
television stations in that building.
So the elevator part was so fun to me.
I remember thinking, I'm going to write like elevator Diaries
or something because the people that I met were incredible.
But when I got to see in my corporate experience, the people
(05:53):
that were in the positions that I was striving for what it what
they were doing and who they were.
And I thought, if I have to do that or be that, then I guess I
don't want it because it was very distant from who I am and
what I believe or, and then people would say, you're so
(06:14):
lucky, Rachel, that you get to do this.
And I and there I'm like, no, I'm good at it.
Like they're like, oh, you love what you do.
I'm like, no, I'm good at what Ido.
There's a difference. And like you, I had my, you
know, little girl dreams and some Hollywood stuff.
And. But it's that what you just
said. I'm like, oh, no, It it you do
sometimes in striving for that, you get away from yourself for
(06:36):
sure. Yeah.
Totally. And I love what you said.
It's like who they were because I felt the same way.
I was like, I don't want to be this person.
I don't want to be these people that are just chasing money and
feeling so unfulfilled and like these shallow goals and sales
goals and numbers. And it just felt so like ick to
me. I was like, I have to get out of
here. And you were an AD girl as well,
right? So I, I start off in advertising
(06:57):
as well, you know, fun business.I used to come sack myself out,
which often you have to do to make money.
And it was like, well, I'm getting paid to make friends.
I'm getting paid to like go to the box suite and invite, you
know, my new professional friends, you know, to come hang
out the concert or whatever. Let's get into now that you who
are, let's get into like the first book that you wrote.
(07:18):
So you were doing some blogging.Where did you feel, at what
point of the blogging did you feel like this is an indication
that I'm ready to scale or this is an indication that I'm
succeeding and I'm ready to go to that next step?
So it was actually the opposite for me.
I knew I wanted to write a book 1st and then I started the blog
(07:39):
to build a platform and create like a, like a readership
essentially for the book. So I knew like I had gone
through this sort of like quarter life crisis, if you
will. And I, it's funny enough, I'll
make a very Long story short. I named it the champagne diet
because I was going through likemy own personal changes and I,
you know, I was on a diet for like the millionth time in my
(08:00):
life, like every woman, right? And I, one of my good friends
that I worked with at MCB, she was like, you're so crazy.
You do all this extreme dieting and you know, you should just
eat healthy. And if you're going to drink,
just drink champagne. Hi.
And she's like, well, champagne only has like 100 calories in
the glass. And it's what all the models
drink. And it's so sexy.
So I started ordering champagne when we went to our little happy
(08:21):
hours or brunches. And I started eating better.
And I was, you know, like takingbetter care of myself.
I left a toxic relationship and I would very tongue in cheek.
I called it the champagne diet. I was like, oh, I'm on the
champagne diet. As soon as I started drinking
champagne, my whole life changed.
And I I thought, this is, there's something to this, like,
this is, this is like catchy. This is a provocative title.
(08:42):
It's a little edgy, but it has like this deeper meaning.
And I knew I wanted to write thebook and, and I didn't know
anyone who would ever written a book, let alone had a blog or a
platform. Like, so all the research that I
did basically said, you know, this was the height of like
Bravo era and like reality showsand the Hills, all these shows
are all over MTV and I was working there, but I was on the
other side of it. And everything that I read and
(09:04):
everyone that I tried to speak to was like, well, you're a
nobody, You're not a celebrity. So, and they, I mean, it is a
very factual way. I wasn't a celebrity, you know,
so you're like, if you want to write a book, you have to
somehow become well known. And I was like, OK, I'll start a
blog. So that's really where the idea
came from. And then I just was like, OK,
once I started to develop those readers and feel like I got some
(09:26):
footing in that world and I started writing, then I was able
to publish the books. You know, I think when you come
from advertising, media, marketing, PR, any of those
areas, you do have sort of this keen sense of how to build,
whether it's authority, right audience notoriety.
I think that we get this look behind the curtain and we're
(09:47):
like, no, there's an actual formula to this.
Like there's people that literally compromise everything
from like their soul to like their, you know, ethics or their
morals to become famous. And some of us that work in
media understand, no, there's anactual sort of pathway you can
take. So I love that those of you that
are listening and understand youdon't got to do some crazy old
thing, but you can start with something like A blog and then
(10:11):
you can test, right, some of thecontent that you're putting out
there. Even social media is a wonderful
test to see as it is it getting traction?
Am I stuck in the 300 view, you know, jail?
Do I need to step up? Maybe the lighting, maybe it's
the topics of the content. Maybe it's the, you know,
inflection in my voice. There's a lot of great skill
(10:32):
building that comes from creating content and being able
to really start to, I call it panning for gold and not money,
but that audience, you know thatthat person that really
resonates with your content. Once you figure out who that is,
my gosh, can you really build onscale on that?
Oh, totally. I that's like the first thing
(10:53):
that I teach to all my personal branding clients.
I'm like, OK, what is your message?
First and foremost, 'cause I think a lot of people teach it
the other way. Find the audience, then create
the content. I'm like, no, find you.
Figure out who you are, what youwant to say, and then figure out
who cares? Like, who's going to care about
this? And then you go even deeper.
You're like, all right, now I found this woman.
This is my dream reader, my dream client.
(11:13):
What transformation am I guidingher through, right?
Where am I taking her? Where is she when she meets me?
And where do I want to take her?And here's a hint.
She's probably you five years ago, or 10 years ago, or six
months ago in some cases. That is the thing that even for
myself coming from media and everything, because I think when
you come from traditional media,it's very commercialized.
(11:37):
It's a very I come from a very aesthetically commercialized era
and now to be living in an era of like point and shoot from
like your car, you're like, hi guys, you know, sweaty from the
gym, like the level of authenticity that needs to come
through. I think that Bethenny and maybe
we can talk about this. Bethenny Frankel, you mentioned
kind of like housewives and stuff like that.
(11:59):
I think that when I observed some of these people that maybe
I didn't watch on television, I'm aware that they come from
television and I'm watching now and women of all different ages.
I mean, I'm knocking on 50 Bethenny.
I don't know her age, but she I from like this psychological
sort of marketing eye and I go, what is the magic?
What is it? What is it?
(12:20):
And then I go, oh, she's talkingto me like we're on FaceTime.
And that is a tough thing to like harness.
That's a tough thing to identifyif you don't really come from
all the different types of mediathat like you come from and I
come from, But I even myself with my experience, I have to
stop and really observe and go, what's the feeling I feel?
(12:43):
What is my brain doing? Like, why am I going?
Why do I stop and watch her whenI'm scrolling?
And then it's, it's not like, oh, her skin or oh, she's so
beautiful. It's nothing in particular.
It's sometimes not even the message because she's like, all
right, bitches, here's my outfitfor tonight or whatever.
I'm like, she's kind of rude to me.
OK, OK, I get it. But then I'm like, no, it's how
(13:03):
you would be with your friend. It's the authenticity.
Yeah, and it's the relatability,right?
I think people are so over anything that's too polished.
Like I, I say this again to my clients, think about when you
watch TV, especially when cable TV before all the streaming
stuff, right? What would happen when a
commercial came on? You would get up, you'd run to
the bathroom, you'd go get a snack, get a glass of wine, go
(13:24):
on your phone. Like do something to disconnect
because you knew it was a commercial.
You knew you were being sold to.Nobody wants to feel like
they're being sold to. You want to just feel like you
are naturally connecting with the person you're interested in,
what they have. My favorite way to be marketed
to or sold to is when somebody speaks very little about what
they're offering, right? Whether it's a coaching program
(13:45):
or a book. And I go down the rabbit hole
because I become obsessive and I'm like, Oh my God, this girl's
amazing. I want to know everything that
you've got going on. And I'm now researching her,
right? It's attraction marketing.
So that's what I think works andit's honestly the easiest thing
to do. It gets hard when we make it
hard. I everything in business and
entrepreneurship. Not everything, but like the the
(14:06):
social media part of it, the selling part should feel light.
It should feel playful. It should feel easy.
If there's too much heaviness around it, your audience is
going to feel that. Yeah, I think it's you're right.
It's, it's that balance of, you know, we talk about like even
here internally, you know, content pillars and all these
different things. And there's this whole debate of
(14:27):
what content pillars actually are.
But my thing is like, even if you just go broad strokes and
you go, OK, does this entertain?Does this educate?
Does this, you know, you know, build authority?
Like what is this doing? Is this connection?
So we're always kind of trying to put things in buckets instead
of throwing things against the wall to see what sticks.
(14:47):
We we try to be mindful, but notto too, you know, restrictive.
It's like, how do we feel today?What do we want to post?
Cool, let's do it. And but yet, you know, again,
you can see someone that you'll look at and go, Oh my God, she
looks like a hot mess and she's sitting in her car after getting
out of the gym and no filters and she's just telling the
(15:07):
story. And by the way, she's making
like a series out of it, hence the total TikTok thing.
And now it's like, whoa, millions of followers.
So it's like popcorn, you know, some pop, some don't.
And I've seen some brilliant content creators, players that
are not content creators are just women that you had the
courage to show up and put a camera on their face.
And the content is so good, but no one sees it.
So, you know, talk to us about being at the mercy of the
(15:31):
algorithm and a woman who's listening to this right now who
is like, I'm doing all the things Cara.
Like I have the decent lighting and I have good audio.
And I really thought about my message and I'm trying to be
authentic and but like no one's seen it.
I think that we have to let go of vanity metrics and numbers
(15:52):
and followers and likes because you're never going to win at
that game. So I would rather focus on who
was in front of me, who has beenfollowing me for some time.
I literally just was about to doa post before we got on because
most of my clients are repeat clients.
Like almost everybody comes back.
Literally, I just got a testimonial from somebody who's
like the second I saw this offer, I knew that I had to do
(16:14):
it because I did this course with you and that course with
you. She's been following me since
like 2010 and she does everything.
She's in all my programs and that's very common for me
because I nurture my warm audience.
The audience that's with me, that's it's my community and I
just talk to them every single day and I show up and I give to
them. And then anyone else that joins
is great. Like I don't focus on getting
(16:36):
new leads all the time. I don't focus on just gaining
followers. I've been a very slow and steady
growth on social media. My podcast, weirdly enough, has
been the thing that's really taken off like that's I don't
know where these 11 million people came from, but there's
11,000,000 downloads and, and counting.
But you know, it's interesting because like on social media,
like Instagram, I have like 100 and I don't know, 70 something
(16:59):
1000 followers. So it's nowhere near the podcast
number. So you just really don't know.
It's like the people that go viral on TikTok but not on
Instagram. Like there's no rhyme or reason.
But I think that we need to stopbeing so focused on how many
clicks we're getting, how many views we're getting and just
think about the fact that there's another human, even if
it's five people, five women have taken time out of their day
(17:20):
to pay attention to you and to read something that you wrote or
to watch a video you posted to maybe buy a book from you or a
coaching package or whatever it is that you're doing a product.
So like celebrate that, you know, like be excited, own it
and, and treat them like humans as opposed to like the numbers
and the algorithm. And I also think like spend time
(17:40):
on other places where the vibe is different.
I love sub stack. I've been on sub stack now for
like a year and a half and I'm obsessed and it's just such a
different energy. I was going to ask you about sub
stack in a minute because I haveto create an account and I'm
eyeing it. I'm eyeing it not just for
myself, but for CEO and I find it very interesting and very
dynamic with the off the tools that it has.
(18:02):
But I wanted to ask you really quick back to social media.
How and I agree with you. I feel like even when I my reels
for whatever, I don't nurture Instagram the way I should.
So I can't blame the algorithm for not giving me love because I
don't give it love. But I'll get like 5.
I have 11 point something 1000 followers.
(18:23):
It's not growing the number. It's weird.
I get like followers but like itdoesn't move.
But other than that, my reels don't get like a huge reach.
Sometimes it's a few thousand, sometimes a few 100.
But I always look at it that way.
Like you said, I look at it likeif I had 300 people in a room
right now or sitting outside of my house right now waiting for
me to come out and say something, that would be a
(18:44):
crowd. You guys like like I think of it
like that. I tell people, please don't look
at that 300 and and and have theick about It's not enough.
How like I'm I'm a Christian preneur.
I'm a I'm a praying girlie. But whatever you believe, think
about the energy behind you have300, your second 300 views and
(19:05):
you're going to be like, oh, it's not enough.
That energy is not the vibe at all.
Instead of like gratitude, like,Oh my God, there's a crowd here.
You guys, like 300 people watched my video.
You have to get in gratitude andand you have to really have
that. So even the reason I'm sharing
that is because even with my little baby views, sometimes on
(19:28):
social media, I get collabs. So I see friends of mine that
have way more followers than me and sometimes way more views,
but they don't get collabs. And so even if you're someone
who's like, I want to get to thepoint where I can start getting
brand collabs and I can start getting these certain things
don't like Carl, like you're saying, don't focus so much on
those metrics, the vanity metrics.
(19:49):
Just be true to what you are putting out there.
Like I always say, I'm, I'm pursuing impact instead of an
income. Like I'm not chasing the money
anymore. I'm chasing purpose and I'm
trying to create in purpose. And if, and if God says, you
know what, 100 people are going to look at it, then then thank
(20:09):
you for those 100 people. And like you said, then I'll go
to my podcast and I'll create anepisode.
But I think it's like, it's justme.
And then there's all these people that downloaded it and
I'm like, OK. And so then by the way,
opportunities come. So don't limit your thinking of
those of you that are listening.Like just to oh, how
embarrassing. I did a video and it only has
(20:30):
300 views. Like don't, don't delete it.
Like don't do that to yourself because you just never know of
those 300 who's watching. Yeah, And like, you've got to be
happy with your content. You know, like I again, like
when I made the shift over to Sub Stack and I chose to start
writing about relationship and dating content, it was right
after my divorce. And I was known for talking
about business and personal development for 15 years at that
(20:52):
point. And I was like, I just know that
it is on my heart to talk more about relationships and not only
to talk about them in a way, actually not at all in a way of
giving advice. I'm known for giving very
prescriptive advice. Here's what to do to feel more
confident. Here's how to do, to build, what
to do to publish a book, to build a brand.
I went in the complete opposite direction.
My new book is called Don't Do Anything.
(21:12):
I would do essays on dating, divorce, and romantic delusions
because I don't want you to do what I did.
I fucked it all up. I made opening mistakes.
I'm still making mistakes. So that to me was a big leap and
I knew my views were going to godown.
I knew they'd be lower. I knew not everybody was going
to get it. But I'll tell you something.
There are some posts that I lookat on my Instagram that I crack
(21:33):
up and laugh. They have like 39 likes, whereas
other things have 10,000 likes. And I don't care because I love
it. It's fun for me, it's playful,
it's creative. So let yourself be your own
barometer for success and let whoever gets it get it.
And the rest That's OK. There's millions of other people
in the world for them to connectwith.
I recently heard somebody say, and I'm gonna do a podcast
(21:55):
episode on this. I recently heard somebody say,
if you're gonna build community,you have to be willing to scare
the shit out of the people that are not your audience.
Like like you need to. I don't know what my hair is
doing, you guys, but I'm like over here trying to do all this
stuff, but you need to be willing to.
I guess it's on the unapologetically you content,
(22:16):
but be willing to like give themthe ick, like piss them off,
whatever the case may be, It's OK for them to leave.
It's OK for them to block unfollow like that.
Actually, when I heard that, I was like, Oh, and I think
because of corporate, there's this very sort of PC element to
the things that I do. And this is like a very, I'm
(22:37):
also a team leader and A, and a business owner.
So I'm very mindful of everybody's, you know, sort of
experiences and stuff like that.But I think when I heard that,
this was like a week ago and I heard it and I was like, oh, I
am going into 2025 and I'm goingto be like that meme that's like
prepared to be sick of me because it's true.
Like, what is she doing? But you have to enjoy it.
(23:00):
It can't feel like work. It has, there's already too many
things about it. That's kind of like work.
You have to be able to have fun.Any time a program that I launch
or a conversation that I'm having feels like work, I stop
doing it. That's it.
I just stop. I am not going to do it.
Even if you told me if you launch this program, it's going
to bring in 50K, I'd be like, I don't want to talk about that
(23:21):
anymore. I'm over it.
I'm going to launch the program.I really want to launch.
Maybe it'll bring in 10K. But I'm happy, you know, and
that's really truly how I've always run my business and it's
never failed. OK, so sub stack, sub stack,
pros, cons, anything. I know it's this is not
sponsored by sub stack, but whatwhat is?
I tell everyone I'm like, they're not paying me.
I mean, they should be because Iliterally convert everybody.
(23:43):
I teach courses on it. I coach her on it.
I just love it. I mean, honestly, for me, and
it's been such a creative escape.
It's been such a great place to go.
So for anyone that doesn't really know what it is, it is
the social media platform in a sense, but it's really truly
like a writing platform. That's what it started as.
It is a way to write, publish personal essays, personal
narratives. There's every topic is on sub
(24:05):
stack from humor to literature to politics to health, all of
the things finance. I mean, you, if you're into it,
there is somebody writing about it.
But what's really refreshing is it truly is about the words.
I mean, now they have a video platform, they have an audio
platform, so you can put a podcast on there.
You can live stream. But really, truly it's about the
words and the writing. And I think that for me has been
(24:26):
the biggest breath of fresh air because I don't have to show up
and look pretty everyday with makeup on and a cute outfit.
I don't have to perform in the sense of like stories, like face
to camera, which I only do when I feel like it.
Half the time I don't feel like it.
You really can, especially if you're a writer or you're
interested in writing, you can really flex that muscle and they
(24:46):
don't have to be perfectly polished pieces.
I saw the head of writer relations on a webinar once for
Sub Stack maybe like last year. And she's like, people subscribe
to your consciousness on Sub Stack.
And I thought that that was so cool because that's exactly what
I do. It's like I find someone on
there. I'm like, oh, she seems really
cool and kind of weird and interesting.
I'm going to follow her. And then I'm just reading the
(25:07):
most random posts. She's writing a poem one day,
she's writing a diary one day, she's writing a manifesto the
next day. So it really does give you
permission to play and define your audience.
And I and my case connects with them in a much more intimate
way, right? I'm not like giving you tips on
how to live your best life or orrun a business.
I'm really just like storytelling.
(25:29):
So it's like we get a glimpse into your diary almost, right?
Totally. And I've also serialized my new
book on there. So that I think is like the next
thing for people, especially in the self-publishing world.
I really think that that's what we're going to see a lot of.
I pay walled it. So for $7.00 a month, you get a
new chapter every week. You get behind the scenes look
(25:49):
at the book. So instead of getting paid one
time by Amazon $7.00 for a $12.00 book, I'm getting paid
every single month by hundreds of people who are coming there
for my content. So they're getting a book and
then they're staying for everything else.
That is brilliant. I am going to take a note on
that one because we're always looking at even today in our
little holiday party that we had, it was like, OK, what are
(26:11):
the monetization opportunities? Because it's so easy to get
caught up in all the fun aspectsof the work and the creative
aspects. And we don't want money to
become part of the limiting belief.
I, I, I did an episode on my podcast that a few months ago or
last year actually, and it was like, I've come to the
conclusion that money can also become a limited belief because
you'll sit there and say, Oh, wecan't do that until we have the
(26:31):
money. So what we we do is we think it
and we do it. We think it and we do it and we
think it and we do it. And then we look up and go, OK,
of all the things that we've done, is there anything that we
can that can generate US money And, and we've done it in that
order where every business I built before, I built A7 figure
business with my team before andit was very much we're not doing
it unless it makes money. Like the nature of that business
was very different, though it was with, it was a magazine and
(26:54):
digital magazine and all that. We did really well.
But and that's very like we're going to build it because it has
to make money. And so when I started with CEO
and we started building the sales, like I don't want money
to become any. I don't want to be limited by
the money. I want to see where our
creativity takes us as women. And I have partners in that
business and they're amazing women.
(27:15):
And to be able to come together and go OK, in a perfect today,
we did it. We did our little notebooks, OK
in 2025. If money is no object, what are
we doing for the business and the brand?
What are we doing for ourselves within the business?
And then what are we doing for the audience, the ladies that
come in and like, and we just wrote and wrote and wrote
together and then we prayed on our stack of notebooks and, and
(27:36):
got really intentional. But now being able to look up
and go, but we want to make money too.
So like where of all the things we love to do, which ones can
become gold? Yep, yeah.
And let yourself dream bigger than you dreamt before.
I think sometimes when we think about monetizing, we just look
at what's been done. But I look at what hasn't been
done and I'm like, OK, what boy do I want to fill?
(27:59):
What do I want to create that I haven't seen before?
That could first and foremost befun for me.
And then secondly, bring an income and don't be afraid to
try things like if you create a product or an offering and it
doesn't sell, like So what? Just move on due to something
new. You know, being able to market
something that you created is still authority building.
You guys like I, I, I look at itlike, OK, you know, racial pact.
(28:23):
It doesn't make me millions of dollars, but what it has lent
itself to do. It's a foundation to many
things, including CEO or gettinginterviewed on television or
whatever the case may be. And it's like things that you
that you create, they then become a brick in your
foundation to something else that you have no idea.
Dining's really great about thisSchultz say, oh, is this
(28:43):
foundational or is this a littleboat that's going to take us to
somewhere to the next island? And it's like, Oh yeah,
actually, that's a boat, but let's let's row it all the way.
Like even if we're not making money on it.
So I think that, yeah, with the money we want, everybody wants
millions of dollars and beyond. But I we have gotten really
great at saying money's nice, but it will come if you love and
(29:06):
believe in the work that you're doing. 100% And if you stop
freaking out about it, you know,like the hardest thing to do, I
think is quiet, all that money noise, especially when you're
not seeing what you want to see in your bank account when you've
got to pay bills. And it's like, how can I, how
can I be creative? But I'm stressed about the
money. You have to like almost trick
yourself and imagine it all being there because it is all
(29:27):
mindset. And I swear it's like magic,
like the second you can let go and just trust and be like I'm
taking care of God's got me. He's never failed me before.
You've never been. Hopefully people that are
listening tell yourself, I've never been evicted from my
apartment. I've never not had food on my
table. I've never not had an outfit to
wear. I've never not been able to get
on my cell phone. And, you know, go on Instagram
(29:48):
like most of us have had our basic needs met.
So if you can trust in that and lean into that and then say God
also would not have given me a vision on my heart if I wasn't
meant to execute it. Exactly.
So let me get to work and stop being crazy and overthinking and
overanalyzing and just do what I'm meant to do in this world.
When you were saying that we live in ourselves by what's
(30:09):
already been done. I have this conversation really
often with myself and others regarding the faith, sort of the
faith girlies. I don't have a ton of friends
that are super into their faith and I became really into my
faith later in life, you know, takes tragedy and all these kind
of hard things that happen. But but in that I have learned
that my prayers are so small. By the way, like when you think
(30:30):
of like, oh, if we could do 25,000 this month, are you
kidding? God's just sitting there like
this or like you're working 15 hours in a day because you're
hustle, you have that hustle energy and he's just sitting
there like, are you? Does she not see me, see her,
see, see me? Like, like it's so ridiculous.
And, and even as far as I go, OK, I want 10,000 and I want it
(30:50):
from here. It's like, who are you to say
where it's coming from? And the amount of blessings and
miracles that I have had come into my life that did not
require money. They require money normally did
not require for me to have that kind of money to be able to have
that experience. I can only attribute it to God.
And so it's like, stop praying small and get out of God's way.
(31:11):
And I'm going to give you guys an example that I shared before
and that is that I took my son for his birthday to an NFL game
in Los Angeles. And I thought to myself, I
really want to come to the NFL game.
I'm not sure what to which one to take them to, though.
And then my friend the next day or two days later was like, hey,
girl, like we're not going to use our tickets if you want to
use our tickets because they're season holders.
(31:31):
OK, cool. When we got there, it was on the
field. So I didn't know that they had
this special privilege in their tickets.
I mean, I should have known better, but I just didn't think
like that. I was like, cool seats.
No, you get to be on the field, like behind the net and watch
them warm up and all this kind of interesting stuff.
So when we were there, my son was like, wow, this amazing mom.
Like, I don't even know, like what this cost.
(31:52):
I'm like, it's not about the money because clearly I did not
spend money on this. And he's like, oh, so then he's
looking at the entire stadium. And I said everybody in life
chose their place in the stadium.
There's the people that chose tobe in the game and play.
There's the people that chose tocommentate on the game and
observe. There's the people that chose to
be a spectator. And then even in the spectator
side, there's the Nosebleed seats, you know, cheap seats.
(32:15):
And then there's like kind of the field seats where we're at.
But then there's those box suites.
And he said, I remember you taking us the box suites.
What do they cost? Anyways?
Long story short, I said all youhave to do is make the phone
calls. You're not going to know unless
you make the phone calls. Don't wait until you have money
to get a box suite to like send an e-mail inquiring of what that
(32:36):
looks like so that you get a sense of what it looks like.
And lo and behold, he sent me the e-mail.
I actually ended up sending sending the e-mail and the man
replied with Metallica or Beyoncé and I said, oh, I like
both actually, but I'll go Beyoncé.
And he said OK, how about September 4th because that's her
birthday. And I'm like what is happening?
(32:58):
Well, what he was doing was he was giving us a tour of the box
suite and he wanted it to be during the concert.
And so we ended up going to LA and by the way, well he pulled
up. The people were like do you oh,
you're going to that suite? It was the owner of the Rams NFL
team who Co owns Sofi Stadium. It was his suite.
(33:20):
So we were in the not just a suite, we were at the Beyoncé
concert lover or hater, but in the owner suite.
Did I pay for that? I did not.
I did not even pay for parking or anything.
So I showed my son like, see, you just have to decide what you
want and don't think, oh, when Ihave much stock money is a tool
(33:41):
that God or the universe, whatever you want to believe in,
uses to bring things forth. But that's not the only way that
he can bring them to you. Yeah, and it like this is the
thing too. I mean, I can talk about money
all day because this is something that I just get so
frustrated when I see people, men and women.
It's not just women, it's all ofus, right?
When I see people feeling guilt around asking for a lot of
(34:02):
money, you know, like I had thisconversation with somebody and,
you know, she was like, oh, I don't know, like I would just
feel so weird if like $1,000,000dropped into my bank account And
I said why? She's like, well, because I
just, I don't know. I would just, I wouldn't know
what to do with it would just gogross.
Like money for me has always been this thing where, you know,
people who have it are evil or bad or they're doing bad things
(34:22):
with it. And I'm like, but what if you
could take that money and pay off your parents home and retire
your husband and take care of your kids and buy your daughter
a car when she turns 16 and put her through college and set her
up in an apartment. And money amplifies people.
Money is opportunity, money is freedom.
Money is power to do the things you want to do in your life.
(34:44):
And even if that thing is buyingyourself 12 Birkins, go buy it.
Like no one's going to be mad atyou if you do this stuff.
It's all just so weirdly ingrained in us and everybody's
got a story about it. So I just really encourage
everybody to follow people. Anyone.
My good friend Amanda Francis teaches on money.
Like go look at her content, follow it.
She's also very faith-based. I don't know if you're familiar
(35:05):
with her, but like it just depends When you surround
yourself with that kind of energy as opposed to that lack
mindset of there's not enough, you are going to mirror that
whether you want to or not or you think you are or not, you're
going to start to have those conversations.
And we have conversations. Universe is listening, and it
just gives us right back what we're saying out loud.
And I, I had a scenario, I was talking about it today where I
(35:28):
had I love Rolls Royces. I do not have one at the moment
yet, yet she is on her way. But I happen to love a
particular Rolls Royce. And again, in this theory of
like money in itself can be a limited belief depending on your
feeling around money, right? And so I am a, I'm a connector.
I'm a super connector. Like if I get to know you and I
know somebody that you can make money with, go here you 2 you,
(35:51):
you have what she needs and go get together.
So I have this guy friend and he's very wealthy and and I had
another friend that was in business and wealthy and he
needed what this guy had. And they didn't know each other.
So I put them together and they got into a business deal.
It didn't end up actually working out, but at the time it
seemed really, really good. And this friend of mine, his
(36:12):
name was Joe. He gives me a call and he says
Rachel and I go, yeah. And he says when this deal with
this deal goes the way it looks like it's going to go, he's
like, guess what I'm giving you?And I was like, what are you
giving me? Because I didn't ask for
anything in that whole thing. I don't believe in that.
I'm like, whoever, whatever's onyour heart to do, you do.
And he said, I'm going to give you the Rolls.
This man, I had never spoken thewords.
(36:33):
I want a Rolls Royce. I, I've been in his Rolls Royce,
beautiful car. He said, I'm going to give you
the Rolls. I don't know why.
I just thought I'm going to giveyou the, I'm going to give
Rachel the Rolls. And I was on speaker.
He was on speaker. And my other son was like, Oh my
God, my mom's getting a Rolls Royce.
And do you know, you guys listen, Cara, you're going to
slap me if you could. I was like, oh, but isn't the
insurance like $2500 a month? And isn't the duh and blah,
(36:57):
blah, blah and blah, blah. And he goes, Rachel, if I get
the deal, you're gonna get the car.
And I was like, OK, hangs up. And when I tell you for like a
week, I was stressing out about the liability.
Do I have room in the garage? Like, what am I going to do?
And then I mentioned it to my mom and she's like, oh, and then
you can't really drive it everywhere.
(37:17):
So we put so much heaviness around something so beautiful
that could have just been amazing.
And I and by the way, I didn't work for the car.
So if the car would have came in, I wouldn't have had the
other stuff would have been solved.
Yeah. Yeah, we do it all the time and
we do it right. Sometimes we do it when we get
the thing, we go sabotage it because we are not comfortable
(37:40):
holding what we want. You know, we think, oh, came
what if I lose it before I lose it, Let me go ruin it.
Let me go sabotage it. Let me put a block in.
I don't feel worthy. So really, this is like such a
good time as we move into the new year to just check all of
that stuff within your body, within your heart and your soul
and your mind. Like worthiness is such a big
thing. And I think that we're just so
(38:02):
trained by our parents, by society, our culture to feel
like I'm not worthy of those things.
Who am I to ask for that? Who am I to have a Rolls Royce,
you know, And then you go and ruin it before it even comes to
you and you block that manifestation.
I sure did I sure and I know I know I did OK, let's get into.
I know that we're going to wind down here a little bit.
Let's talk quickly about this new era of buying your blue
(38:27):
check and like paying to be on podcasts and like sort of the
fake it to make it. What's your take on that because
I know you're not a woman that had to do that.
I, I feel like I'm not a woman that had to do that.
I also don't want to make anybody feel bad if they did if
they do feel that that's the route they want to take.
But can you just share your thoughts on that?
Yeah, I mean, so I got a blue check through my publisher.
(38:50):
I, you know, I wound up self-publishing.
Then I got a book dealing, went back to self-publishing.
But for a period of time, I did have publisher.
They gave me the blue check. I didn't ask for it.
It was just one of those things where they're like, well, you're
on the cover of your book and you can potentially be
impersonated. So we worked with Instagram.
I got it overnight. It's literally based on my
contract and it was great and ithas helped me tremendously.
(39:10):
Now, that's much because anyone can buy it.
So it's like really not as special and no shade to anybody
that's bought it. Like do you?
I might have bought one at this point if I hadn't had one.
Who knows? But I will tell you that earning
something for me has always feltbetter.
You know, all of my PR and presshas come from organic press.
(39:31):
My feature in Oprah, my feature in Forbes, all the magazines
I've been in has all come from an editor that happened to
stumble upon me, love my podcast, read my books and write
something about me, quote me, put me on a listicle, whatever.
I had press through my publisher.
I got nothing notable through their entire publicity campaign
(39:51):
for my book. Nothing.
Some random business blogs that really meant nothing to me
offense, but they just didn't align.
And then I had a pub. I have a friend who's a
publicist who's pitched me out acouple of times and like nothing
ever came of that. So you know, you can play the
game, you can do the paper play thing.
I just personally feel so much better when it's authentic and
(40:14):
it's earns media. I feel the same as you.
I have yet in my entire media career, I've I've been invited
on stages to speak and articles written in television shows and
and all of these different things.
That is not like Oprah or Forbesor anything major like that, but
enough where it's easy to question why me?
This is interesting. I just say yes, and I go with
the flow. I had not knocked on doors like
(40:36):
I have not been like, hi, I don't have that pick me energy.
And if somebody does randomly spam me and they're like, Oh, we
want to feature you and the woman of the year.
It's only 2500. There's no part of me that
thinks that that's a good idea or that it's going to mean
anything. Like you, I am.
I'm an accomplishment girl. Like I'm very motivated by
(40:56):
achieving certain things and, and I do not as the time of this
recording, I do not have a blue check.
If you look at myself, I'm in all kinds of media and I just
haven't gotten it. And I applied a while back, you
know, on Instagram or whatever. Now people buy it and everyone's
like, Rachel, why don't you havea blue check?
So it seems weird to people thatI don't have one.
(41:17):
And then I see people that I know haven't done anything.
They're trying to, but then theyhave one.
And so I know that the day that it comes, it's going to be that.
I know that it's, it just, it came to me like I like, for
whatever reason, it just came. Not that it means as much to
anybody, but for me, I just can't see myself paying 15
bucks. And it's not even about the $15
or whatever it is. It's like I just go, I don't
(41:38):
know, like if it's meant to be, it'll happen.
It's like it's lost its meaning at this point.
You know, it kind of reminds me.I mean, maybe it's because you
and I are from a similar generation.
Like I did not come from the like, I was born in 1980.
I'm 44, gonna be 45 in April. I didn't come from the
generation where everybody got astar, where everybody got a
trophy. Like you worked for that shit.
Well, you got that promotion, you busted your ass like you did
(42:00):
what you needed to do. So I very much just like you,
thrive on authentic accomplishment.
You want to write about me, you want to promote me.
That's great. I'm getting there because I
worked for it, not because I felt like I wanted to be part of
something and and cheat my way, you know, to the top, like just
never. That doesn't excite me.
It's, it's really odd, but everybody, whatever you're
(42:20):
trying to do, do you, I can tellyou.
I have lots of clients that havebought it and that makes them
feel good. Like that's why it's it's such
an authentic thing. And I think especially when it
comes to business coaching, any sort of coaching, I'll never
tell somebody what to do. I'm like, here's somebody, I did
it. I want you to feel good about
what you're doing. And I never hate on another
woman for anything. So like I will just say that it
just wasn't my my journey. What would you do differently if
(42:46):
you were to start today and no one knew who you are and you
didn't have any of these things that you've already
accomplished? What steps would you take today
if you were starting at 0 and wanted to be where you are right
now? I mean, I would do everything
that I've done. It's interesting.
I started before Instagram existed.
(43:07):
Like I didn't even have Instagram when I first started.
So I started on my personal Facebook page and Twitter.
That's all we had at the time. I did local events in my
neighborhood. My first event, before I even
published a book, I called it a blog party instead of a book
party because I didn't have a book yet.
And I went to my local bookstore.
I didn't even know the girl who owned it at the time in
Brooklyn. And I said, hey, can I set up
(43:28):
here? I'll buy some cupcakes.
I'll buy a bottle of champagne. It was like a cheap bottle of
Corbell, whatever I could afford.
This is going way back. And I made little postcards from
Staples and they just had the name of my blog and a little
description. And anyone that walks in the
bookstore, I walked up to them and I handed them a little flyer
and I said, do you want a cupcake?
That's what I mean. This is who I am.
And like a local paper, which was a feeder paper I didn't
(43:51):
know, which is, you know, a paper that goes to other places,
wrote a story about it. It was like, could champagne be
the next, you know, big thing, champagne diet.
It got picked up in Glamour the next day in Cosmo, MSN,
Australia, the Daily Mail, and it just went everywhere.
So you just never know. And I tell that to everybody
from starting from zero because we've all started from zero.
Just talk about what you're doing right?
(44:12):
Like put yourself out there. Don't sleep on local businesses
to partner with, don't sleep on live events.
I, I personally think that people are so burnt out from the
Internet that they're starting to crave the in person
communities. So launch something, Don't wait
for somebody to pick you. Like, just like you, I am not
the pick me girl. Pick me up is not for me.
(44:32):
I am very much like, this is what I want to do.
So I'm doing it like when I started doing my readings and
storytelling. This is exactly.
So I feel like I almost did start from zero with, like, the
dating content because no one knew me for that.
And it was a new, the literary world was new for me.
I was in the personal development space.
So I went to a couple of readings here in New York City.
And, like, you know, they're typically in little dive bars.
(44:54):
You know, you find out who's hosting it, you don't get paid.
You show up, you read a piece and you leave.
Yeah. And I went to a couple of them.
And I remember feeling like people wanted me to come because
they saw that I had a big following, so they thought I'd,
like, promote their thing, whichis fine.
But then I was like, there's no more readings going on this
month, but I really want to readmy essays.
Like, what can I do? I just started my own.
(45:15):
I talked to a local bartender who had become a good friend who
runs a bar in Brooklyn, and I said, I want to do my own.
She's like, come into my space. All you have to do is make sure
the bartender gets tipped at theend of the night.
I started making pliers and I launched my own literary salon.
So like, it's don't wait around.I think that's like what I've
always done. It's the formula that I used 16
years ago that I still use today.
(45:36):
Create what you wish existed, you know, like, and also believe
in yourself enough to know that what you have is important.
Like, don't overthink it. You don't have to be perfect.
You're never going to feel like you're ready.
You just got to go. Is there a process that you can
attribute to you being able to go the long haul?
(45:57):
Because people go into business and they go out of business,
they they build some notoriety, then they they burn out.
What is something about your process that you can tell us
that is, like you think, a game changer?
Being able to pivot quickly and not get stuck and paralyzed when
you fail or when something gets messed up or you get afraid,
(46:17):
Like just if it doesn't work, ifit doesn't sell, if you don't
sell tickets, just pivot as quickly as possible.
Learn from whatever went wrong, but then just turn it around and
keep it moving. I think for me, like getting my
book rejected the first time by 19 publishers, I could have sat
there and really read all those rejection letters and cried and
said, you know what? I'm just meant to be in
corporate forever. I'm not meant to write this
(46:37):
book. But I was like, no, I was
keeping my eye on the self-publishing world at the
same time, reading all the blogs, reading everything coming
out around it. I went and self published.
So just be quick on your feet, you know, be willing to take
that no and create your own yes out of it in whatever way makes
sense for you. Wonderful.
Where can they find you? Or can they listen to you, read
(47:00):
from you, follow you? OK.
So my website has everything. It's just carasaysitall.com.
So Cara with AC. That's also the name of my
podcast. We rebranded recently and my
Instagram is the champagne diet,so those are kind of like 3
spots. You can find me all my courses,
my coaching, everything is all on my website.
Good stuff, my blog. Wonderful.
(47:22):
That is it. We are good to go.
Thank you so much for being on the podcast and we look forward
to sharing it with the CEO community and you can share it
with yours. And it's been wonderful to have
you. Thank you so much, it's been so
fun.
Welcome to another episode of the Rachel Unpacked podcast.
I am your host Rachel Medina andin every episode we talk about
mindset, wealth, building and faith for every girlie who is
looking to change and level up her life.
If you want to follow me on social media, you can do so at
Rachel Medina 101 or visit my website rachelmedina.com.
But if you are ready to build a business in a life that you
(00:23):
love, head on over to our new she eox.com site again, She EO
dot com where you are going to find a tribe of like minded
business building dream aspiringgirl.
He's just like you, connecting, learning and growing together.
And a new CEO X partnership program means we attract the
(00:43):
talented, experienced and successful women who are ready
to teach you how they did it so that you can succeed too.
Let's go. Welcome, Kara Alwell.
Thank you, Rachel, I'm so excited to be here and I can't
believe we tried to do this. You said six or seven months
ago. I feel like I was a different
person back then so I am so excited to be back and be here.
(01:05):
Cara 2 point O, Rachel 2 point Omoving into the New Years
together. So I'm really excited.
Yes. OK, so I ask everybody, tell us
what you do, who you do it for, and what is unique about what
you do? Yeah, I mean, that's kind of a
loaded question, right? Because I feel like I've been
doing this for so long and I've evolved so much in my own brand
(01:27):
and mission. But at the core, what I really
do is help women own their voice, own their story, amplify
their voice, and really put themselves out there in a way
that they feel excited about, inspired by, proud of.
I'm an author first and foremost.
I've written 10 books and those books have been translated all
over the world, which is honestly, I feel like if I die
(01:49):
tomorrow, I could die feeling like my legacy like has been
made. And like I've chill saying that
because I think that not a lot of people get to experience
that. And I've worked really hard to
make that happen. And just knowing that I've been
able to touch one woman, let alone millions is just so wild
to me. And I'm so, so grateful.
But really what I do is just, you know, help women, whether
(02:09):
it's through helping them write books and tell their stories on
Sub Stack or self publish their own books through their
podcasts, or just, you know, really kind of enhance their
personal brands and get themselves out there.
That is my mission in the world and nothing makes me happier.
Who were you before all of this?Before all of this, I was a
(02:32):
little girl that always wanted to be a writer.
I always knew that I was going to publish books.
I thought that I was going to publish fiction books.
It's so funny. I did a project in school and it
was a book. It was called The Cat Who
Couldn't Fit In. And I made it out of like
construction paper and felt. And I wrote in about the author
page and it's my class picture from like whatever grade I was
in grade or something. And I wrote that I'm a
(02:54):
children's book author and with a degree in psychology and I was
a teacher, I think. And it's about the author, this
fantasy that I had. But I always knew like that that
was what I was going to do. I always knew that I was a
storyteller. I used to dress up in my
grandmother's clothes when I waslittle.
Like she always had these like Boas and wigs.
And I would just like say that Iwas this actress from Hollywood.
So I always knew that I wanted to tell stories, but my path
(03:17):
didn't take me on that road perfectly.
Like I always say, it's never linear, whether we're talking
business, life, love, it is never a straight path to where
you want to go. But I'm really fortunate for
that. My path took me down the
corporate road and I was in the music industry and I love music.
It's like my second love. It's like writing and music.
Those two, they're, they're really the same in so many ways,
(03:37):
but they were just always my 2 great loves.
And I wound up working in the music business for a while, went
on and worked at MTV. And the higher I climbed, I
don't know if you can relate to this or anyone listening kind,
the higher that I climbed in corporate, the further I got
away from my true soul and my true creativity, right?
Like it looks great on paper. The money was coming, the office
(03:59):
was there, the staff was there, and I was just like, who the
hell am I? Like I just don't feel like me
anymore. So, you know, around the time I
I was probably in my mid to late20s and I was in this corporate
job in MTV. I was advertising and I was just
so miserable. And I started a blog.
This is when blogging was first taking off 2000 and seven, 2008.
And I just said if I could just help one woman with this blog
(04:23):
just by telling my stories at the time I was dating somebody
that was all wrong for me as we do in our 20s trying to figure
it out and is X and the city wasa big show at the time.
And I was like, I kind of want to write for the Sex and the
City Girlies, but I don't want to talk about dating.
Like I want to talk about yourself and personal growth and
development. And that's really where the
Champagne Diet, that's my formerblog came from.
(04:45):
And then through that became, itbecame a book.
And then, you know, now 10 booksand a podcast and a coaching
practice. And it's just that's kind of
where I started. Isn't it amazing when we talk
about, we're trying to adjust myhair myself here in case you
guys hear anything weird, But when you talk about the
corporate part of it, I was in the magazine industry.
So you were in music. Obviously MTV is a big deal at
(05:08):
the time and magazines were sortof really glamorized at the time
as well. And it is, it was like that
feeling I, I, I that lands with me about the closer you got to
sort of achieving these things in corporate, the further away
you get from your actual true sort of calling or your essence.
Because I got to the point whereI was able to see, I climbed
very quickly. I remember being in Los Angeles
(05:30):
and thinking, this is like the pinnacle of besides New York,
you know, LA is like, here I am in this high rise and I get to
ride these elevators and there'sa few radio radio stations and
television stations in that building.
So the elevator part was so fun to me.
I remember thinking, I'm going to write like elevator Diaries
or something because the people that I met were incredible.
But when I got to see in my corporate experience, the people
(05:53):
that were in the positions that I was striving for what it what
they were doing and who they were.
And I thought, if I have to do that or be that, then I guess I
don't want it because it was very distant from who I am and
what I believe or, and then people would say, you're so
(06:14):
lucky, Rachel, that you get to do this.
And I and there I'm like, no, I'm good at it.
Like they're like, oh, you love what you do.
I'm like, no, I'm good at what Ido.
There's a difference. And like you, I had my, you
know, little girl dreams and some Hollywood stuff.
And. But it's that what you just
said. I'm like, oh, no, It it you do
sometimes in striving for that, you get away from yourself for
(06:36):
sure. Yeah.
Totally. And I love what you said.
It's like who they were because I felt the same way.
I was like, I don't want to be this person.
I don't want to be these people that are just chasing money and
feeling so unfulfilled and like these shallow goals and sales
goals and numbers. And it just felt so like ick to
me. I was like, I have to get out of
here. And you were an AD girl as well,
right? So I, I start off in advertising
(06:57):
as well, you know, fun business.I used to come sack myself out,
which often you have to do to make money.
And it was like, well, I'm getting paid to make friends.
I'm getting paid to like go to the box suite and invite, you
know, my new professional friends, you know, to come hang
out the concert or whatever. Let's get into now that you who
are, let's get into like the first book that you wrote.
(07:18):
So you were doing some blogging.Where did you feel, at what
point of the blogging did you feel like this is an indication
that I'm ready to scale or this is an indication that I'm
succeeding and I'm ready to go to that next step?
So it was actually the opposite for me.
I knew I wanted to write a book 1st and then I started the blog
(07:39):
to build a platform and create like a, like a readership
essentially for the book. So I knew like I had gone
through this sort of like quarter life crisis, if you
will. And I, it's funny enough, I'll
make a very Long story short. I named it the champagne diet
because I was going through likemy own personal changes and I,
you know, I was on a diet for like the millionth time in my
(08:00):
life, like every woman, right? And I, one of my good friends
that I worked with at MCB, she was like, you're so crazy.
You do all this extreme dieting and you know, you should just
eat healthy. And if you're going to drink,
just drink champagne. Hi.
And she's like, well, champagne only has like 100 calories in
the glass. And it's what all the models
drink. And it's so sexy.
So I started ordering champagne when we went to our little happy
(08:21):
hours or brunches. And I started eating better.
And I was, you know, like takingbetter care of myself.
I left a toxic relationship and I would very tongue in cheek.
I called it the champagne diet. I was like, oh, I'm on the
champagne diet. As soon as I started drinking
champagne, my whole life changed.
And I I thought, this is, there's something to this, like,
this is, this is like catchy. This is a provocative title.
(08:42):
It's a little edgy, but it has like this deeper meaning.
And I knew I wanted to write thebook and, and I didn't know
anyone who would ever written a book, let alone had a blog or a
platform. Like, so all the research that I
did basically said, you know, this was the height of like
Bravo era and like reality showsand the Hills, all these shows
are all over MTV and I was working there, but I was on the
other side of it. And everything that I read and
(09:04):
everyone that I tried to speak to was like, well, you're a
nobody, You're not a celebrity. So, and they, I mean, it is a
very factual way. I wasn't a celebrity, you know,
so you're like, if you want to write a book, you have to
somehow become well known. And I was like, OK, I'll start a
blog. So that's really where the idea
came from. And then I just was like, OK,
once I started to develop those readers and feel like I got some
(09:26):
footing in that world and I started writing, then I was able
to publish the books. You know, I think when you come
from advertising, media, marketing, PR, any of those
areas, you do have sort of this keen sense of how to build,
whether it's authority, right audience notoriety.
I think that we get this look behind the curtain and we're
(09:47):
like, no, there's an actual formula to this.
Like there's people that literally compromise everything
from like their soul to like their, you know, ethics or their
morals to become famous. And some of us that work in
media understand, no, there's anactual sort of pathway you can
take. So I love that those of you that
are listening and understand youdon't got to do some crazy old
thing, but you can start with something like A blog and then
(10:11):
you can test, right, some of thecontent that you're putting out
there. Even social media is a wonderful
test to see as it is it getting traction?
Am I stuck in the 300 view, you know, jail?
Do I need to step up? Maybe the lighting, maybe it's
the topics of the content. Maybe it's the, you know,
inflection in my voice. There's a lot of great skill
(10:32):
building that comes from creating content and being able
to really start to, I call it panning for gold and not money,
but that audience, you know thatthat person that really
resonates with your content. Once you figure out who that is,
my gosh, can you really build onscale on that?
Oh, totally. I that's like the first thing
(10:53):
that I teach to all my personal branding clients.
I'm like, OK, what is your message?
First and foremost, 'cause I think a lot of people teach it
the other way. Find the audience, then create
the content. I'm like, no, find you.
Figure out who you are, what youwant to say, and then figure out
who cares? Like, who's going to care about
this? And then you go even deeper.
You're like, all right, now I found this woman.
This is my dream reader, my dream client.
(11:13):
What transformation am I guidingher through, right?
Where am I taking her? Where is she when she meets me?
And where do I want to take her?And here's a hint.
She's probably you five years ago, or 10 years ago, or six
months ago in some cases. That is the thing that even for
myself coming from media and everything, because I think when
you come from traditional media,it's very commercialized.
(11:37):
It's a very I come from a very aesthetically commercialized era
and now to be living in an era of like point and shoot from
like your car, you're like, hi guys, you know, sweaty from the
gym, like the level of authenticity that needs to come
through. I think that Bethenny and maybe
we can talk about this. Bethenny Frankel, you mentioned
kind of like housewives and stuff like that.
(11:59):
I think that when I observed some of these people that maybe
I didn't watch on television, I'm aware that they come from
television and I'm watching now and women of all different ages.
I mean, I'm knocking on 50 Bethenny.
I don't know her age, but she I from like this psychological
sort of marketing eye and I go, what is the magic?
What is it? What is it?
(12:20):
And then I go, oh, she's talkingto me like we're on FaceTime.
And that is a tough thing to like harness.
That's a tough thing to identifyif you don't really come from
all the different types of mediathat like you come from and I
come from, But I even myself with my experience, I have to
stop and really observe and go, what's the feeling I feel?
(12:43):
What is my brain doing? Like, why am I going?
Why do I stop and watch her whenI'm scrolling?
And then it's, it's not like, oh, her skin or oh, she's so
beautiful. It's nothing in particular.
It's sometimes not even the message because she's like, all
right, bitches, here's my outfitfor tonight or whatever.
I'm like, she's kind of rude to me.
OK, OK, I get it. But then I'm like, no, it's how
(13:03):
you would be with your friend. It's the authenticity.
Yeah, and it's the relatability,right?
I think people are so over anything that's too polished.
Like I, I say this again to my clients, think about when you
watch TV, especially when cable TV before all the streaming
stuff, right? What would happen when a
commercial came on? You would get up, you'd run to
the bathroom, you'd go get a snack, get a glass of wine, go
(13:24):
on your phone. Like do something to disconnect
because you knew it was a commercial.
You knew you were being sold to.Nobody wants to feel like
they're being sold to. You want to just feel like you
are naturally connecting with the person you're interested in,
what they have. My favorite way to be marketed
to or sold to is when somebody speaks very little about what
they're offering, right? Whether it's a coaching program
(13:45):
or a book. And I go down the rabbit hole
because I become obsessive and I'm like, Oh my God, this girl's
amazing. I want to know everything that
you've got going on. And I'm now researching her,
right? It's attraction marketing.
So that's what I think works andit's honestly the easiest thing
to do. It gets hard when we make it
hard. I everything in business and
entrepreneurship. Not everything, but like the the
(14:06):
social media part of it, the selling part should feel light.
It should feel playful. It should feel easy.
If there's too much heaviness around it, your audience is
going to feel that. Yeah, I think it's you're right.
It's, it's that balance of, you know, we talk about like even
here internally, you know, content pillars and all these
different things. And there's this whole debate of
(14:27):
what content pillars actually are.
But my thing is like, even if you just go broad strokes and
you go, OK, does this entertain?Does this educate?
Does this, you know, you know, build authority?
Like what is this doing? Is this connection?
So we're always kind of trying to put things in buckets instead
of throwing things against the wall to see what sticks.
(14:47):
We we try to be mindful, but notto too, you know, restrictive.
It's like, how do we feel today?What do we want to post?
Cool, let's do it. And but yet, you know, again,
you can see someone that you'll look at and go, Oh my God, she
looks like a hot mess and she's sitting in her car after getting
out of the gym and no filters and she's just telling the
(15:07):
story. And by the way, she's making
like a series out of it, hence the total TikTok thing.
And now it's like, whoa, millions of followers.
So it's like popcorn, you know, some pop, some don't.
And I've seen some brilliant content creators, players that
are not content creators are just women that you had the
courage to show up and put a camera on their face.
And the content is so good, but no one sees it.
So, you know, talk to us about being at the mercy of the
(15:31):
algorithm and a woman who's listening to this right now who
is like, I'm doing all the things Cara.
Like I have the decent lighting and I have good audio.
And I really thought about my message and I'm trying to be
authentic and but like no one's seen it.
I think that we have to let go of vanity metrics and numbers
(15:52):
and followers and likes because you're never going to win at
that game. So I would rather focus on who
was in front of me, who has beenfollowing me for some time.
I literally just was about to doa post before we got on because
most of my clients are repeat clients.
Like almost everybody comes back.
Literally, I just got a testimonial from somebody who's
like the second I saw this offer, I knew that I had to do
(16:14):
it because I did this course with you and that course with
you. She's been following me since
like 2010 and she does everything.
She's in all my programs and that's very common for me
because I nurture my warm audience.
The audience that's with me, that's it's my community and I
just talk to them every single day and I show up and I give to
them. And then anyone else that joins
is great. Like I don't focus on getting
(16:36):
new leads all the time. I don't focus on just gaining
followers. I've been a very slow and steady
growth on social media. My podcast, weirdly enough, has
been the thing that's really taken off like that's I don't
know where these 11 million people came from, but there's
11,000,000 downloads and, and counting.
But you know, it's interesting because like on social media,
like Instagram, I have like 100 and I don't know, 70 something
(16:59):
1000 followers. So it's nowhere near the podcast
number. So you just really don't know.
It's like the people that go viral on TikTok but not on
Instagram. Like there's no rhyme or reason.
But I think that we need to stopbeing so focused on how many
clicks we're getting, how many views we're getting and just
think about the fact that there's another human, even if
it's five people, five women have taken time out of their day
(17:20):
to pay attention to you and to read something that you wrote or
to watch a video you posted to maybe buy a book from you or a
coaching package or whatever it is that you're doing a product.
So like celebrate that, you know, like be excited, own it
and, and treat them like humans as opposed to like the numbers
and the algorithm. And I also think like spend time
(17:40):
on other places where the vibe is different.
I love sub stack. I've been on sub stack now for
like a year and a half and I'm obsessed and it's just such a
different energy. I was going to ask you about sub
stack in a minute because I haveto create an account and I'm
eyeing it. I'm eyeing it not just for
myself, but for CEO and I find it very interesting and very
dynamic with the off the tools that it has.
(18:02):
But I wanted to ask you really quick back to social media.
How and I agree with you. I feel like even when I my reels
for whatever, I don't nurture Instagram the way I should.
So I can't blame the algorithm for not giving me love because I
don't give it love. But I'll get like 5.
I have 11 point something 1000 followers.
(18:23):
It's not growing the number. It's weird.
I get like followers but like itdoesn't move.
But other than that, my reels don't get like a huge reach.
Sometimes it's a few thousand, sometimes a few 100.
But I always look at it that way.
Like you said, I look at it likeif I had 300 people in a room
right now or sitting outside of my house right now waiting for
me to come out and say something, that would be a
(18:44):
crowd. You guys like like I think of it
like that. I tell people, please don't look
at that 300 and and and have theick about It's not enough.
How like I'm I'm a Christian preneur.
I'm a I'm a praying girlie. But whatever you believe, think
about the energy behind you have300, your second 300 views and
(19:05):
you're going to be like, oh, it's not enough.
That energy is not the vibe at all.
Instead of like gratitude, like,Oh my God, there's a crowd here.
You guys, like 300 people watched my video.
You have to get in gratitude andand you have to really have
that. So even the reason I'm sharing
that is because even with my little baby views, sometimes on
(19:28):
social media, I get collabs. So I see friends of mine that
have way more followers than me and sometimes way more views,
but they don't get collabs. And so even if you're someone
who's like, I want to get to thepoint where I can start getting
brand collabs and I can start getting these certain things
don't like Carl, like you're saying, don't focus so much on
those metrics, the vanity metrics.
(19:49):
Just be true to what you are putting out there.
Like I always say, I'm, I'm pursuing impact instead of an
income. Like I'm not chasing the money
anymore. I'm chasing purpose and I'm
trying to create in purpose. And if, and if God says, you
know what, 100 people are going to look at it, then then thank
(20:09):
you for those 100 people. And like you said, then I'll go
to my podcast and I'll create anepisode.
But I think it's like, it's justme.
And then there's all these people that downloaded it and
I'm like, OK. And so then by the way,
opportunities come. So don't limit your thinking of
those of you that are listening.Like just to oh, how
embarrassing. I did a video and it only has
(20:30):
300 views. Like don't, don't delete it.
Like don't do that to yourself because you just never know of
those 300 who's watching. Yeah, And like, you've got to be
happy with your content. You know, like I again, like
when I made the shift over to Sub Stack and I chose to start
writing about relationship and dating content, it was right
after my divorce. And I was known for talking
about business and personal development for 15 years at that
(20:52):
point. And I was like, I just know that
it is on my heart to talk more about relationships and not only
to talk about them in a way, actually not at all in a way of
giving advice. I'm known for giving very
prescriptive advice. Here's what to do to feel more
confident. Here's how to do, to build, what
to do to publish a book, to build a brand.
I went in the complete opposite direction.
My new book is called Don't Do Anything.
(21:12):
I would do essays on dating, divorce, and romantic delusions
because I don't want you to do what I did.
I fucked it all up. I made opening mistakes.
I'm still making mistakes. So that to me was a big leap and
I knew my views were going to godown.
I knew they'd be lower. I knew not everybody was going
to get it. But I'll tell you something.
There are some posts that I lookat on my Instagram that I crack
(21:33):
up and laugh. They have like 39 likes, whereas
other things have 10,000 likes. And I don't care because I love
it. It's fun for me, it's playful,
it's creative. So let yourself be your own
barometer for success and let whoever gets it get it.
And the rest That's OK. There's millions of other people
in the world for them to connectwith.
I recently heard somebody say, and I'm gonna do a podcast
(21:55):
episode on this. I recently heard somebody say,
if you're gonna build community,you have to be willing to scare
the shit out of the people that are not your audience.
Like like you need to. I don't know what my hair is
doing, you guys, but I'm like over here trying to do all this
stuff, but you need to be willing to.
I guess it's on the unapologetically you content,
(22:16):
but be willing to like give themthe ick, like piss them off,
whatever the case may be, It's OK for them to leave.
It's OK for them to block unfollow like that.
Actually, when I heard that, I was like, Oh, and I think
because of corporate, there's this very sort of PC element to
the things that I do. And this is like a very, I'm
(22:37):
also a team leader and A, and a business owner.
So I'm very mindful of everybody's, you know, sort of
experiences and stuff like that.But I think when I heard that,
this was like a week ago and I heard it and I was like, oh, I
am going into 2025 and I'm goingto be like that meme that's like
prepared to be sick of me because it's true.
Like, what is she doing? But you have to enjoy it.
(23:00):
It can't feel like work. It has, there's already too many
things about it. That's kind of like work.
You have to be able to have fun.Any time a program that I launch
or a conversation that I'm having feels like work, I stop
doing it. That's it.
I just stop. I am not going to do it.
Even if you told me if you launch this program, it's going
to bring in 50K, I'd be like, I don't want to talk about that
(23:21):
anymore. I'm over it.
I'm going to launch the program.I really want to launch.
Maybe it'll bring in 10K. But I'm happy, you know, and
that's really truly how I've always run my business and it's
never failed. OK, so sub stack, sub stack,
pros, cons, anything. I know it's this is not
sponsored by sub stack, but whatwhat is?
I tell everyone I'm like, they're not paying me.
I mean, they should be because Iliterally convert everybody.
(23:43):
I teach courses on it. I coach her on it.
I just love it. I mean, honestly, for me, and
it's been such a creative escape.
It's been such a great place to go.
So for anyone that doesn't really know what it is, it is
the social media platform in a sense, but it's really truly
like a writing platform. That's what it started as.
It is a way to write, publish personal essays, personal
narratives. There's every topic is on sub
(24:05):
stack from humor to literature to politics to health, all of
the things finance. I mean, you, if you're into it,
there is somebody writing about it.
But what's really refreshing is it truly is about the words.
I mean, now they have a video platform, they have an audio
platform, so you can put a podcast on there.
You can live stream. But really, truly it's about the
words and the writing. And I think that for me has been
(24:26):
the biggest breath of fresh air because I don't have to show up
and look pretty everyday with makeup on and a cute outfit.
I don't have to perform in the sense of like stories, like face
to camera, which I only do when I feel like it.
Half the time I don't feel like it.
You really can, especially if you're a writer or you're
interested in writing, you can really flex that muscle and they
(24:46):
don't have to be perfectly polished pieces.
I saw the head of writer relations on a webinar once for
Sub Stack maybe like last year. And she's like, people subscribe
to your consciousness on Sub Stack.
And I thought that that was so cool because that's exactly what
I do. It's like I find someone on
there. I'm like, oh, she seems really
cool and kind of weird and interesting.
I'm going to follow her. And then I'm just reading the
(25:07):
most random posts. She's writing a poem one day,
she's writing a diary one day, she's writing a manifesto the
next day. So it really does give you
permission to play and define your audience.
And I and my case connects with them in a much more intimate
way, right? I'm not like giving you tips on
how to live your best life or orrun a business.
I'm really just like storytelling.
(25:29):
So it's like we get a glimpse into your diary almost, right?
Totally. And I've also serialized my new
book on there. So that I think is like the next
thing for people, especially in the self-publishing world.
I really think that that's what we're going to see a lot of.
I pay walled it. So for $7.00 a month, you get a
new chapter every week. You get behind the scenes look
(25:49):
at the book. So instead of getting paid one
time by Amazon $7.00 for a $12.00 book, I'm getting paid
every single month by hundreds of people who are coming there
for my content. So they're getting a book and
then they're staying for everything else.
That is brilliant. I am going to take a note on
that one because we're always looking at even today in our
little holiday party that we had, it was like, OK, what are
(26:11):
the monetization opportunities? Because it's so easy to get
caught up in all the fun aspectsof the work and the creative
aspects. And we don't want money to
become part of the limiting belief.
I, I, I did an episode on my podcast that a few months ago or
last year actually, and it was like, I've come to the
conclusion that money can also become a limited belief because
you'll sit there and say, Oh, wecan't do that until we have the
(26:31):
money. So what we we do is we think it
and we do it. We think it and we do it and we
think it and we do it. And then we look up and go, OK,
of all the things that we've done, is there anything that we
can that can generate US money And, and we've done it in that
order where every business I built before, I built A7 figure
business with my team before andit was very much we're not doing
it unless it makes money. Like the nature of that business
was very different, though it was with, it was a magazine and
(26:54):
digital magazine and all that. We did really well.
But and that's very like we're going to build it because it has
to make money. And so when I started with CEO
and we started building the sales, like I don't want money
to become any. I don't want to be limited by
the money. I want to see where our
creativity takes us as women. And I have partners in that
business and they're amazing women.
(27:15):
And to be able to come together and go OK, in a perfect today,
we did it. We did our little notebooks, OK
in 2025. If money is no object, what are
we doing for the business and the brand?
What are we doing for ourselves within the business?
And then what are we doing for the audience, the ladies that
come in and like, and we just wrote and wrote and wrote
together and then we prayed on our stack of notebooks and, and
(27:36):
got really intentional. But now being able to look up
and go, but we want to make money too.
So like where of all the things we love to do, which ones can
become gold? Yep, yeah.
And let yourself dream bigger than you dreamt before.
I think sometimes when we think about monetizing, we just look
at what's been done. But I look at what hasn't been
done and I'm like, OK, what boy do I want to fill?
(27:59):
What do I want to create that I haven't seen before?
That could first and foremost befun for me.
And then secondly, bring an income and don't be afraid to
try things like if you create a product or an offering and it
doesn't sell, like So what? Just move on due to something
new. You know, being able to market
something that you created is still authority building.
You guys like I, I, I look at itlike, OK, you know, racial pact.
(28:23):
It doesn't make me millions of dollars, but what it has lent
itself to do. It's a foundation to many
things, including CEO or gettinginterviewed on television or
whatever the case may be. And it's like things that you
that you create, they then become a brick in your
foundation to something else that you have no idea.
Dining's really great about thisSchultz say, oh, is this
(28:43):
foundational or is this a littleboat that's going to take us to
somewhere to the next island? And it's like, Oh yeah,
actually, that's a boat, but let's let's row it all the way.
Like even if we're not making money on it.
So I think that, yeah, with the money we want, everybody wants
millions of dollars and beyond. But I we have gotten really
great at saying money's nice, but it will come if you love and
(29:06):
believe in the work that you're doing. 100% And if you stop
freaking out about it, you know,like the hardest thing to do, I
think is quiet, all that money noise, especially when you're
not seeing what you want to see in your bank account when you've
got to pay bills. And it's like, how can I, how
can I be creative? But I'm stressed about the
money. You have to like almost trick
yourself and imagine it all being there because it is all
(29:27):
mindset. And I swear it's like magic,
like the second you can let go and just trust and be like I'm
taking care of God's got me. He's never failed me before.
You've never been. Hopefully people that are
listening tell yourself, I've never been evicted from my
apartment. I've never not had food on my
table. I've never not had an outfit to
wear. I've never not been able to get
on my cell phone. And, you know, go on Instagram
(29:48):
like most of us have had our basic needs met.
So if you can trust in that and lean into that and then say God
also would not have given me a vision on my heart if I wasn't
meant to execute it. Exactly.
So let me get to work and stop being crazy and overthinking and
overanalyzing and just do what I'm meant to do in this world.
When you were saying that we live in ourselves by what's
(30:09):
already been done. I have this conversation really
often with myself and others regarding the faith, sort of the
faith girlies. I don't have a ton of friends
that are super into their faith and I became really into my
faith later in life, you know, takes tragedy and all these kind
of hard things that happen. But but in that I have learned
that my prayers are so small. By the way, like when you think
(30:30):
of like, oh, if we could do 25,000 this month, are you
kidding? God's just sitting there like
this or like you're working 15 hours in a day because you're
hustle, you have that hustle energy and he's just sitting
there like, are you? Does she not see me, see her,
see, see me? Like, like it's so ridiculous.
And, and even as far as I go, OK, I want 10,000 and I want it
(30:50):
from here. It's like, who are you to say
where it's coming from? And the amount of blessings and
miracles that I have had come into my life that did not
require money. They require money normally did
not require for me to have that kind of money to be able to have
that experience. I can only attribute it to God.
And so it's like, stop praying small and get out of God's way.
(31:11):
And I'm going to give you guys an example that I shared before
and that is that I took my son for his birthday to an NFL game
in Los Angeles. And I thought to myself, I
really want to come to the NFL game.
I'm not sure what to which one to take them to, though.
And then my friend the next day or two days later was like, hey,
girl, like we're not going to use our tickets if you want to
use our tickets because they're season holders.
(31:31):
OK, cool. When we got there, it was on the
field. So I didn't know that they had
this special privilege in their tickets.
I mean, I should have known better, but I just didn't think
like that. I was like, cool seats.
No, you get to be on the field, like behind the net and watch
them warm up and all this kind of interesting stuff.
So when we were there, my son was like, wow, this amazing mom.
Like, I don't even know, like what this cost.
(31:52):
I'm like, it's not about the money because clearly I did not
spend money on this. And he's like, oh, so then he's
looking at the entire stadium. And I said everybody in life
chose their place in the stadium.
There's the people that chose tobe in the game and play.
There's the people that chose tocommentate on the game and
observe. There's the people that chose to
be a spectator. And then even in the spectator
side, there's the Nosebleed seats, you know, cheap seats.
(32:15):
And then there's like kind of the field seats where we're at.
But then there's those box suites.
And he said, I remember you taking us the box suites.
What do they cost? Anyways?
Long story short, I said all youhave to do is make the phone
calls. You're not going to know unless
you make the phone calls. Don't wait until you have money
to get a box suite to like send an e-mail inquiring of what that
(32:36):
looks like so that you get a sense of what it looks like.
And lo and behold, he sent me the e-mail.
I actually ended up sending sending the e-mail and the man
replied with Metallica or Beyoncé and I said, oh, I like
both actually, but I'll go Beyoncé.
And he said OK, how about September 4th because that's her
birthday. And I'm like what is happening?
(32:58):
Well, what he was doing was he was giving us a tour of the box
suite and he wanted it to be during the concert.
And so we ended up going to LA and by the way, well he pulled
up. The people were like do you oh,
you're going to that suite? It was the owner of the Rams NFL
team who Co owns Sofi Stadium. It was his suite.
(33:20):
So we were in the not just a suite, we were at the Beyoncé
concert lover or hater, but in the owner suite.
Did I pay for that? I did not.
I did not even pay for parking or anything.
So I showed my son like, see, you just have to decide what you
want and don't think, oh, when Ihave much stock money is a tool
(33:41):
that God or the universe, whatever you want to believe in,
uses to bring things forth. But that's not the only way that
he can bring them to you. Yeah, and it like this is the
thing too. I mean, I can talk about money
all day because this is something that I just get so
frustrated when I see people, men and women.
It's not just women, it's all ofus, right?
When I see people feeling guilt around asking for a lot of
(34:02):
money, you know, like I had thisconversation with somebody and,
you know, she was like, oh, I don't know, like I would just
feel so weird if like $1,000,000dropped into my bank account And
I said why? She's like, well, because I
just, I don't know. I would just, I wouldn't know
what to do with it would just gogross.
Like money for me has always been this thing where, you know,
people who have it are evil or bad or they're doing bad things
(34:22):
with it. And I'm like, but what if you
could take that money and pay off your parents home and retire
your husband and take care of your kids and buy your daughter
a car when she turns 16 and put her through college and set her
up in an apartment. And money amplifies people.
Money is opportunity, money is freedom.
Money is power to do the things you want to do in your life.
(34:44):
And even if that thing is buyingyourself 12 Birkins, go buy it.
Like no one's going to be mad atyou if you do this stuff.
It's all just so weirdly ingrained in us and everybody's
got a story about it. So I just really encourage
everybody to follow people. Anyone.
My good friend Amanda Francis teaches on money.
Like go look at her content, follow it.
She's also very faith-based. I don't know if you're familiar
(35:05):
with her, but like it just depends When you surround
yourself with that kind of energy as opposed to that lack
mindset of there's not enough, you are going to mirror that
whether you want to or not or you think you are or not, you're
going to start to have those conversations.
And we have conversations. Universe is listening, and it
just gives us right back what we're saying out loud.
And I, I had a scenario, I was talking about it today where I
(35:28):
had I love Rolls Royces. I do not have one at the moment
yet, yet she is on her way. But I happen to love a
particular Rolls Royce. And again, in this theory of
like money in itself can be a limited belief depending on your
feeling around money, right? And so I am a, I'm a connector.
I'm a super connector. Like if I get to know you and I
know somebody that you can make money with, go here you 2 you,
(35:51):
you have what she needs and go get together.
So I have this guy friend and he's very wealthy and and I had
another friend that was in business and wealthy and he
needed what this guy had. And they didn't know each other.
So I put them together and they got into a business deal.
It didn't end up actually working out, but at the time it
seemed really, really good. And this friend of mine, his
(36:12):
name was Joe. He gives me a call and he says
Rachel and I go, yeah. And he says when this deal with
this deal goes the way it looks like it's going to go, he's
like, guess what I'm giving you?And I was like, what are you
giving me? Because I didn't ask for
anything in that whole thing. I don't believe in that.
I'm like, whoever, whatever's onyour heart to do, you do.
And he said, I'm going to give you the Rolls.
This man, I had never spoken thewords.
(36:33):
I want a Rolls Royce. I, I've been in his Rolls Royce,
beautiful car. He said, I'm going to give you
the Rolls. I don't know why.
I just thought I'm going to giveyou the, I'm going to give
Rachel the Rolls. And I was on speaker.
He was on speaker. And my other son was like, Oh my
God, my mom's getting a Rolls Royce.
And do you know, you guys listen, Cara, you're going to
slap me if you could. I was like, oh, but isn't the
insurance like $2500 a month? And isn't the duh and blah,
(36:57):
blah, blah and blah, blah. And he goes, Rachel, if I get
the deal, you're gonna get the car.
And I was like, OK, hangs up. And when I tell you for like a
week, I was stressing out about the liability.
Do I have room in the garage? Like, what am I going to do?
And then I mentioned it to my mom and she's like, oh, and then
you can't really drive it everywhere.
(37:17):
So we put so much heaviness around something so beautiful
that could have just been amazing.
And I and by the way, I didn't work for the car.
So if the car would have came in, I wouldn't have had the
other stuff would have been solved.
Yeah. Yeah, we do it all the time and
we do it right. Sometimes we do it when we get
the thing, we go sabotage it because we are not comfortable
(37:40):
holding what we want. You know, we think, oh, came
what if I lose it before I lose it, Let me go ruin it.
Let me go sabotage it. Let me put a block in.
I don't feel worthy. So really, this is like such a
good time as we move into the new year to just check all of
that stuff within your body, within your heart and your soul
and your mind. Like worthiness is such a big
thing. And I think that we're just so
(38:02):
trained by our parents, by society, our culture to feel
like I'm not worthy of those things.
Who am I to ask for that? Who am I to have a Rolls Royce,
you know, And then you go and ruin it before it even comes to
you and you block that manifestation.
I sure did I sure and I know I know I did OK, let's get into.
I know that we're going to wind down here a little bit.
Let's talk quickly about this new era of buying your blue
(38:27):
check and like paying to be on podcasts and like sort of the
fake it to make it. What's your take on that because
I know you're not a woman that had to do that.
I, I feel like I'm not a woman that had to do that.
I also don't want to make anybody feel bad if they did if
they do feel that that's the route they want to take.
But can you just share your thoughts on that?
Yeah, I mean, so I got a blue check through my publisher.
(38:50):
I, you know, I wound up self-publishing.
Then I got a book dealing, went back to self-publishing.
But for a period of time, I did have publisher.
They gave me the blue check. I didn't ask for it.
It was just one of those things where they're like, well, you're
on the cover of your book and you can potentially be
impersonated. So we worked with Instagram.
I got it overnight. It's literally based on my
contract and it was great and ithas helped me tremendously.
(39:10):
Now, that's much because anyone can buy it.
So it's like really not as special and no shade to anybody
that's bought it. Like do you?
I might have bought one at this point if I hadn't had one.
Who knows? But I will tell you that earning
something for me has always feltbetter.
You know, all of my PR and presshas come from organic press.
(39:31):
My feature in Oprah, my feature in Forbes, all the magazines
I've been in has all come from an editor that happened to
stumble upon me, love my podcast, read my books and write
something about me, quote me, put me on a listicle, whatever.
I had press through my publisher.
I got nothing notable through their entire publicity campaign
(39:51):
for my book. Nothing.
Some random business blogs that really meant nothing to me
offense, but they just didn't align.
And then I had a pub. I have a friend who's a
publicist who's pitched me out acouple of times and like nothing
ever came of that. So you know, you can play the
game, you can do the paper play thing.
I just personally feel so much better when it's authentic and
(40:14):
it's earns media. I feel the same as you.
I have yet in my entire media career, I've I've been invited
on stages to speak and articles written in television shows and
and all of these different things.
That is not like Oprah or Forbesor anything major like that, but
enough where it's easy to question why me?
This is interesting. I just say yes, and I go with
the flow. I had not knocked on doors like
(40:36):
I have not been like, hi, I don't have that pick me energy.
And if somebody does randomly spam me and they're like, Oh, we
want to feature you and the woman of the year.
It's only 2500. There's no part of me that
thinks that that's a good idea or that it's going to mean
anything. Like you, I am.
I'm an accomplishment girl. Like I'm very motivated by
(40:56):
achieving certain things and, and I do not as the time of this
recording, I do not have a blue check.
If you look at myself, I'm in all kinds of media and I just
haven't gotten it. And I applied a while back, you
know, on Instagram or whatever. Now people buy it and everyone's
like, Rachel, why don't you havea blue check?
So it seems weird to people thatI don't have one.
(41:17):
And then I see people that I know haven't done anything.
They're trying to, but then theyhave one.
And so I know that the day that it comes, it's going to be that.
I know that it's, it just, it came to me like I like, for
whatever reason, it just came. Not that it means as much to
anybody, but for me, I just can't see myself paying 15
bucks. And it's not even about the $15
or whatever it is. It's like I just go, I don't
(41:38):
know, like if it's meant to be, it'll happen.
It's like it's lost its meaning at this point.
You know, it kind of reminds me.I mean, maybe it's because you
and I are from a similar generation.
Like I did not come from the like, I was born in 1980.
I'm 44, gonna be 45 in April. I didn't come from the
generation where everybody got astar, where everybody got a
trophy. Like you worked for that shit.
Well, you got that promotion, you busted your ass like you did
(42:00):
what you needed to do. So I very much just like you,
thrive on authentic accomplishment.
You want to write about me, you want to promote me.
That's great. I'm getting there because I
worked for it, not because I felt like I wanted to be part of
something and and cheat my way, you know, to the top, like just
never. That doesn't excite me.
It's, it's really odd, but everybody, whatever you're
(42:20):
trying to do, do you, I can tellyou.
I have lots of clients that havebought it and that makes them
feel good. Like that's why it's it's such
an authentic thing. And I think especially when it
comes to business coaching, any sort of coaching, I'll never
tell somebody what to do. I'm like, here's somebody, I did
it. I want you to feel good about
what you're doing. And I never hate on another
woman for anything. So like I will just say that it
just wasn't my my journey. What would you do differently if
(42:46):
you were to start today and no one knew who you are and you
didn't have any of these things that you've already
accomplished? What steps would you take today
if you were starting at 0 and wanted to be where you are right
now? I mean, I would do everything
that I've done. It's interesting.
I started before Instagram existed.
(43:07):
Like I didn't even have Instagram when I first started.
So I started on my personal Facebook page and Twitter.
That's all we had at the time. I did local events in my
neighborhood. My first event, before I even
published a book, I called it a blog party instead of a book
party because I didn't have a book yet.
And I went to my local bookstore.
I didn't even know the girl who owned it at the time in
Brooklyn. And I said, hey, can I set up
(43:28):
here? I'll buy some cupcakes.
I'll buy a bottle of champagne. It was like a cheap bottle of
Corbell, whatever I could afford.
This is going way back. And I made little postcards from
Staples and they just had the name of my blog and a little
description. And anyone that walks in the
bookstore, I walked up to them and I handed them a little flyer
and I said, do you want a cupcake?
That's what I mean. This is who I am.
And like a local paper, which was a feeder paper I didn't
(43:51):
know, which is, you know, a paper that goes to other places,
wrote a story about it. It was like, could champagne be
the next, you know, big thing, champagne diet.
It got picked up in Glamour the next day in Cosmo, MSN,
Australia, the Daily Mail, and it just went everywhere.
So you just never know. And I tell that to everybody
from starting from zero because we've all started from zero.
Just talk about what you're doing right?
(44:12):
Like put yourself out there. Don't sleep on local businesses
to partner with, don't sleep on live events.
I, I personally think that people are so burnt out from the
Internet that they're starting to crave the in person
communities. So launch something, Don't wait
for somebody to pick you. Like, just like you, I am not
the pick me girl. Pick me up is not for me.
(44:32):
I am very much like, this is what I want to do.
So I'm doing it like when I started doing my readings and
storytelling. This is exactly.
So I feel like I almost did start from zero with, like, the
dating content because no one knew me for that.
And it was a new, the literary world was new for me.
I was in the personal development space.
So I went to a couple of readings here in New York City.
And, like, you know, they're typically in little dive bars.
(44:54):
You know, you find out who's hosting it, you don't get paid.
You show up, you read a piece and you leave.
Yeah. And I went to a couple of them.
And I remember feeling like people wanted me to come because
they saw that I had a big following, so they thought I'd,
like, promote their thing, whichis fine.
But then I was like, there's no more readings going on this
month, but I really want to readmy essays.
Like, what can I do? I just started my own.
(45:15):
I talked to a local bartender who had become a good friend who
runs a bar in Brooklyn, and I said, I want to do my own.
She's like, come into my space. All you have to do is make sure
the bartender gets tipped at theend of the night.
I started making pliers and I launched my own literary salon.
So like, it's don't wait around.I think that's like what I've
always done. It's the formula that I used 16
years ago that I still use today.
(45:36):
Create what you wish existed, you know, like, and also believe
in yourself enough to know that what you have is important.
Like, don't overthink it. You don't have to be perfect.
You're never going to feel like you're ready.
You just got to go. Is there a process that you can
attribute to you being able to go the long haul?
(45:57):
Because people go into business and they go out of business,
they they build some notoriety, then they they burn out.
What is something about your process that you can tell us
that is, like you think, a game changer?
Being able to pivot quickly and not get stuck and paralyzed when
you fail or when something gets messed up or you get afraid,
(46:17):
Like just if it doesn't work, ifit doesn't sell, if you don't
sell tickets, just pivot as quickly as possible.
Learn from whatever went wrong, but then just turn it around and
keep it moving. I think for me, like getting my
book rejected the first time by 19 publishers, I could have sat
there and really read all those rejection letters and cried and
said, you know what? I'm just meant to be in
corporate forever. I'm not meant to write this
(46:37):
book. But I was like, no, I was
keeping my eye on the self-publishing world at the
same time, reading all the blogs, reading everything coming
out around it. I went and self published.
So just be quick on your feet, you know, be willing to take
that no and create your own yes out of it in whatever way makes
sense for you. Wonderful.
Where can they find you? Or can they listen to you, read
(47:00):
from you, follow you? OK.
So my website has everything. It's just carasaysitall.com.
So Cara with AC. That's also the name of my
podcast. We rebranded recently and my
Instagram is the champagne diet,so those are kind of like 3
spots. You can find me all my courses,
my coaching, everything is all on my website.
Good stuff, my blog. Wonderful.
(47:22):
That is it. We are good to go.
Thank you so much for being on the podcast and we look forward
to sharing it with the CEO community and you can share it
with yours. And it's been wonderful to have
you. Thank you so much, it's been so
fun.
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