January 20, 2023 • 27 mins
When Lori Ann Wood found her life drastically altered by a medical crisis, she learned it was a divine detour leading her to answer three urgent questions we all wrestle with. Wood's new book, Divine Detour, will release in February 2023.
Get Lori's free Resource, Hope for the Life You Didn't Choose at: https://lorieannwood.com/hope
Learn more about her upcoming book at https://loriannwood.com/books
Guest Bio:
Lori Ann Wood lives in the shadow of the Ozark Mountains in beautiful Bentonville, Arkansas, with her husband, the unsuspecting guy she chased all the way from 9th grade to grad school. She is mom to three world-changing young adults, one impressive son-in-law (who all live too far away) and a miniature dachshund named Pearl (who threatens to never leave). Her new favorite role is appropriately spoiling her granddaughter Hazel.
In addition to receiving the Frederick Buechner Narrative Essay Award from The Christian Century Magazine, her work has won awards from The Colorado Christian Writers Association and The Evangelical Press Association. Lori Ann has been published in numerous print journals including Just Between Us Magazine, The Joyful Life Magazine, Bella Grace Magazine, Heart Insight Magazine, and Sweet to the Soul FAITH Magazine. Her articles have also appeared on websites such as Pepperdine University Press, Yahoo Lifestyle, and MSN, and on blogs including Women | Faith & Story, Kindred Mom, WomenHeart, and The Mighty. Lori Ann also serves on the Blog Contributor Team for The Joyful Life Magazine.
But Lori Ann has not always been a writer.
A life detour reordered her priorities and rattled her faith.
In 2015, despite otherwise pristine health, Lori Ann almost died from heart failure from an unknown cause. Her heart was functioning at just 6%. She spent 14 days in ICU as doctors tried to save her life. Lori Ann was then transferred to the Cleveland Clinic where she became her doctor’s most critical patient for a year and a half. She was eventually implanted with a pacemaker and internal defibrillator. Against all medical odds, her heart function was initially restored sixteen months later. But as heart failure goes, her condition has experienced ups-and-downs since then. And as the Christian walk goes, so has her faith.
Having discovered this chronic, progressive condition almost too late, Lori Ann now writes to encourage difficult faith questions along the detours of life. Her passion is to connect with readers and help them hold onto their faith when they find themselves on a path they didn’t choose.
Her first book, Divine Detour: The Path You Didn’t Choose Can Lead to the Faith You’ve Always Wanted, will release in early 2023. Find her at https://loriannwood.com.
Learn more about Radical Abundance at Radical-Abundance.com
Teresa Janzen is your host. She ignites a passion for abundant living through radical service. Teresa is an international speaker, author, and coach of speakers and writers. Her experience in leadership and global ministry drives her to share inspiring stories with wit and insight. Her candid and personable style is sure to capture the heart of any audience.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:05):
Welcome to Radical Abundance.
I'm your host, Teresa Janssen.
You know what it's like?
Your life is going justthe way you want, and
suddenly there's a detour.
Today's guest is Lori AnnWood, and she's written a book
about those divine detours.
She's experienced adivine detour as a result
of a medical crisis.
We're gonna hear all aboutthe story and how it can lead
(00:26):
to even an extraordinary.
Welcome to Radical Abundance.
Lori, it's great tohave you on the show.
Thank you, Teresa.
It's so great to be here.
I'm excited.
Okay, Lori Ann, let'sstart off with that story.
What happened?
What was the big detourin your life that led you
eventually to write thisbook that'll come out in
February?
(00:47):
I had a shocking diagnosis, andit was about seven years ago.
I.
. The funny part about it wasI had a medical evaluation
and I was told that I hadless than 3% chance of ever
developing heart diseasebecause I had great cholesterol,
(01:07):
I had low blood pressure.
All my numbers were good.
I had no family history.
I had no lifestyle riskfactors, so I was a good bet
for not getting heart disease.
But then three weeks afterthat evaluation, . I was
in cardiac intensive carewith end stage heart failure
(01:29):
from an unknown cause.
I was broadsided.
, of course.
And what I had done is Iwas just feeling sluggish.
I didn't have any energy.
I felt like I had the flu.
I had no idea thatwas, there was anything
wrong with my heart.
That was the last thingon my list of things that
(01:52):
could be wrong with me.
And I went to my pcp, my familydoctor, and the words that he
said to me, I knew they weregonna be significant, but
I didn't know in what way.
But he listened to my heartand did all the things he
could do in the office.
And then he said, if we'relucky, it's pneumonia.
(02:13):
and my husband was with me.
And I remember looking athim thinking that was worst
case, that it was pneumonia.
And my doctor took me rightto get a chest x-ray and
found that my heart wasenlarged very enlarged.
And it was actuallyfunctioning at about 6%.
(02:34):
, I was just, I was direct,admitted into I C U from
that doctor's office, and Ispent 14 days there in I C U.
I had, d defibrillator padsstuck to my chest and a crash
cart right outside my door and.
. I just functioned there.
We lived in I C U fora couple of weeks.
(02:54):
They didn't want me togo home at that point
because they didn't thinkI could survive at home.
We didn't know this at thetime, but later learned.
, she probably won'tsurvive at home.
And once I left the hospital,I had an external defibrillator
vest on and I wore that 24hours a day for nine months and
(03:14):
within a couple of weeks flownto Cleveland Clinic and met with
the head of transplant there.
And I.
She told me recently, sheactually wrote the forward to my
book, but she told me recentlythat I was her most critical
patient for a year and a half.
And she was on pins and needlesthat whole time, and I was
(03:36):
just wearing my life vest,taking these high-powered
meds and holding on.
And then we would go inevery once in a while to get
evaluated and check my heartfunction and nothing happened.
I never improved.
In fact, I went 16 monthswith no improvement.
I did get an internal devicewithin that 16 months, but
(03:58):
still didn't really getany measurable improve.
And then out of nowhere really,I went in for something else
and they tested my heartand my heart function was
restored to normal at about16 months post-diagnosis.
To tell you the truth, Ithought that was my story.
(04:20):
I thought my story wasone of divine healing and
God's care and provision.
I was gonna tell that storyand that was gonna be what
God had in mind for my life.
But three years ago, myheart function dropped and
(04:40):
I found myself in activeheart failure again.
And I've learned throughthe course of this disease
and dealing with its effectsis that heart failure is a
chronic progressive disease.
For most people, medicalscience can manage the symptoms
with devices and medicationsand lifestyle changes.
(05:02):
For some, they can slow theprogression, but there really
is not a cure, and it reallyonly goes in one direction.
So right now I'm holdingsteady at a lower heart.
. And what I have found duringthat time is that I have taken
(05:23):
some risks and I have steppedout in ways that I wouldn't have
done in a safer, healthier life.
And so I was ableto write this book.
It was born at my diagnosis,but it's not primarily
about the medical events.
It's really a guide forpeople to confront question.
(05:44):
, I hear so much going on inyour story right now, and at
the time that you had thisdivine detour enter your
life, this medical crisis.
Of course, you have a lotof things going through your
mind, but you said that atthe time you didn't even
recognize where it was going.
You thought your story wasgoing to be that of divine
healing, yet a heart condit.
(06:07):
Is a chronic disease thatgoes one direction, not
towards healing, but towardsa steady decline, really.
So the story wasn't about thephysical, it was more spiritual
and it led you to the questions.
In fact, you told me therewere three questions that
we all have to answer.
Tell me more about thosethree questions and how.
(06:28):
even came to that.
There were three questionsI started writing.
Someone dropped off a journalearly on in my ICU room and
I was writing like lists ofpeople I need to write thank
you notes to, or reminders.
I still had kids at homereminder to, do this at
school or whatever it waswhile I was in the hospital
(06:49):
and my husband at one point.
We should be writing thisdown, or you should be
taking notes about what youknow, the what's going on.
And I didn't want to,because I didn't ever wanna
relive what was going on,but I started to write it
down and then those notesstarted to grow into a blog.
And then those blogsgrew into articles.
(07:11):
And then the articlesgrew into this book.
And what I found as I waswriting is that everything I
was wrestling, Was fallen intothese three categories or these
three questions, and the moreI studied about it and wrestled
with it, the more I realizedthat everyone is on a detour.
Because if you think aboutit, a detour is just,
(07:34):
you're going along on thisplanned route and all of a
sudden you can't anymore.
You're forced off of it.
It's not a choice you make.
You're forced off of it andit's not the prettiest road
or maybe the smoothest roador the most convenient road,
or even the shortest wayto get to your destination.
(07:58):
And that's what happens toall of us at some point.
And while we're on thatdetour, we start this
questioning process andthose three questions that
came out of it are the.
questions that Jesus hadto have wrestled with in
the desert when he facedthose three temptations.
(08:20):
The, there's a couple of placesin scripture where it talks
about Jesus going to the desert,but in Matthew chapter four,
the first time when Jesus,or the first temptation that
Jesus faced in the desertwas when the enemy said,
tell these stones to become.
If I'm thinking, if I'm Jesus,I'm thinking I'm really hungry.
I would love for thosestones to become bread.
(08:42):
Now, is that what I should do?
Is my survival and myphysical wellbeing the most
important thing in my life?
Because if it is, I should justgo ahead and eat that bread.
And that became to me a questionthat I call a question of worry.
(09:03):
and we all face that.
We wonder is this lifeall there is because that
reorders our priorities ifit is all there is, and I
think Jesus wrestled withthat as a man at that moment
with the enemy in the desert.
And we all do when we'redetoured into the desert
(09:24):
and we have physicalpain or relational.
We wonder if we need tojust be concerned with
our immediate life.
One of the things that cameout of it for me when I looked
at that question of worry,was I really had to be honest
with myself because I learnedthat my faith actually had
(09:45):
me at the center of it andmy wellbeing at the center of
it, and that was something Ineeded to work on and change.
But that question, helped tobring that to my attention.
Thiscame to you later, though, not
while you were in I C U, eventhough the journey started
there, you started, it was aprogressive revelation that
(10:05):
there were three questions.
At the point in time, youstarted questioning about
your life, your physicallife, and worrying about
those types of things.
What.
Did it make, when you beganto answer that question for
yourself, there were somany little sub-questions.
I would say within that questionof worry, things like loss
(10:28):
and uncertainty and fear andregret, which I explore all
of those in the book, but Iwas coming to terms with is
there something more valuable?
They were telling me I had avery short amount of time, so is
there something more valuable?
Than just this immediate life.
Does God have somethingmore for me than just this
(10:50):
moment in what I can see?
I had been a Christian aslong as I can remember.
. But until I really faced thatupfront and really up close,
I hadn't really come to aconclusion about that in, in
the way that my heart was.
I think I still wantedeverything to resolve just
(11:11):
right for me, and it isjust the human condition.
I think in Jesus's example whenhe didn't do that and he could.
that was for me, something thatI started to learn about and
really changed my perspective.
Lorianne.
What I think is reallysignificant here is that you
were a person of faith evenat that time when you're
(11:34):
questioning, and oftentimesI think Christians really
feel guilty when theystart to question or worry
because we are told to havefaith and trust in God.
Yet Jesus himself faced thisquestion in the wilderness.
Of course he was, he'sperfect, but also as human.
How did you feel at that time?
(11:55):
, did you feel guilty as aChristian facing those doubts
and worrying about your lifeor were you able to just
say, you know that I havea relationship with God?
That's okay.
That I worry, I struggledwith questions.
I felt like that maybe was thereason that I wasn't getting
those first 16 months, and therewas no improvement I thought.
(12:19):
I don't have enough faith.
I'm not strong enough.
I'm letting my prayer warriorsdown that were praying
for me around the clock.
And I didn't realize atthe time how much questions
can strengthen your faithbecause I've learned over
those months and now years,that when we poke and prod
(12:42):
and question and wrestl.
, our faith gets stronger andit gets more defined, and
we can get our hands on it.
We choose God again and again,and we don't just choose him
once and put him on a shelf.
That to me, was the value ofthose questions is that it
(13:04):
was on my mind all the time.
He was on my mind.
My faith was on my mind all thetime because, Those questions
were nagging, and I thinksometimes, like you said, we
shy away from questions or thinkthat reflects badly on us, or
that God would be disappointedwith a question or other
people might be disappointed.
(13:24):
But in reality, Thequestions are what keeps
us bringing us back to him.
I can, I think that'scompletely true because a
faith that doesn't questionis a faith that doesn't grow.
But also those questionsshow that we are reasoning
and struggling and workingout our faith and not just
blindly accepting or buildingour faith on tradition.
(13:48):
Or family or our, thefaith of our parents.
When we struggle and really workthrough those issues, we come
out of it with a faith that'sproven and tested, and I think
that's really important and youfound a stronger faith on the
other side of those questions.
.
Yes.
And that reminds me of somethingthat I really clung to during
(14:10):
that time is that, the oppositeof faith we think of as
doubt, but really the oppositeof faith is indifference.
It's just walking away andsaying, I'm done with it.
I'm washing my hands of it.
I don't want anythingto do with it.
But when we doubt, whichhappens to be question number
two, , but when we doubt, webring him up again and again.
(14:33):
And he doesn't shyaway from that.
And scripture plays that outwith job and so many other
examples we have where wecan, questioning God's not
gonna punish us or back away.
He wants to just keepthat conversation going.
And so that was, like I said,that was the second question
(14:54):
because when Jesus wentinto the desert, that first
question was about tell thesestones to become breaded.
But the second question was,or the second temptation
was, throw yourself down andthe angels will protect you.
Float throw caution to thewind because God will not
let his beloved be harm.
(15:16):
. If he let you be harmed,then he must not love you.
He must have abandoned you.
And we formulate thisquestion in our mind.
Is God always good?
Because what's happeningin my life right now
doesn't feel good.
It doesn't feel like love.
(15:37):
Can I know that it is love?
Even when it doesn'tfeel like it is.
God always.
Good.
So I looked at things likeprotection and resilience
and vulnerability, and reallystarted to dig down into
whether the, my current pain,does my current pain indicate
(16:02):
God's level of care for.
Is that on par?
Just because I'm in pain,does that mean God is mad at
me or God is punishing me, orGod's turned his face from me?
And why doesn't, if he is aGod of love all the time, why
doesn't this feel like love?
One of the things that Ilearned is that God never
(16:24):
promised us that we won'texperience the worst that
this world has to offer.
But he did promise that ifwe do, we won't be alone.
And that's the, that is worthso much more than not having
the trouble in the first place.
Lorianne, one of thebiggest questions that.
(16:47):
, I've heard people say, keepsthem from faith is that
question of if God is good,why do bad things happen?
Or if God is powerful, whydoes he allow good things
or bad things to happen?
Why doesn't he intervene?
And so again, it's a questionwe can't shy away from because
we know this is a fallen worldand that there are bad things
(17:08):
that are going to happen.
It's not a question.
God allowing bad things tohappen, but it's a question
of the result of living in aworld that is dominated by sin
and yet God is sovereign, andhow do we come to a place of
being able to reconcile that?
(17:29):
in our own faith.
And how did that work outfor you, where you're going
through this real crisisand saying, God, why?
That's the bigquestion, isn't it?
When we're in themidst of it, why?
Where did you find that answer?
That was a big part ofit is why, and I think
as human beings, wewant things to resolve.
(17:49):
We want to know a reason,and we're thinking
people and creatures and.
Know enough to knowthat we don't know and
it really bothers us.
So I think what I'verealized is that God is
always a God of healing.
Sometimes he's heals on thisside of eternity, but he
(18:12):
always heals in the next.
And we look at our part ofthe story, we're all just one
little part of this huge storythat God's writing and we
look at our part of the story.
And we want it toresolve in our lifetime.
And I think about the peopleyou know who didn't have that
(18:34):
resolved in their lifetime.
The apostles, Stephen John theBaptist, those stories did not
make sense in their lifetime,but they're part of this
bigger story arc and so are we.
So we have to realize.
We can't it'd be like readingone chapter of a book and
(18:57):
thinking that you couldunderstand the entire story
by reading one chapter.
And we don't get the, a lotof times, and maybe most of
us won't see the completed endof our story in our lifetime.
But that doesn't meanthat God is not good.
It doesn't mean that hewon't work out everything
for the good of his people.
(19:18):
It just means that in ourlifetime we not, we might
not make sense of it.
I love that.
Idea and especially relatingit to the idea of reading
one chapter in a bookand thinking that we'll
see the whole story arc.
Because we do just havea limited perspective and
we don't know where ourstory even intersects in
(19:39):
the lives of stories andpeople that we may not even.
Directly encounter that theremay be indirect encounters,
that God has the biggerpicture, and he's a big enough
God to accept our questions,our worries, our doubts.
And that brings me lorianne.
What's question number three?
(19:59):
Question number three, if youremember the account of Jesus
in the desert facing the enemy.
The third temptation in Matthewwas, Bow down to me and all of
these kingdoms will be yours.
What that meant for Jesuswas, I know what God's plan
is, but maybe there's abetter plan, or maybe God's
(20:22):
plan's not quite enough.
And we do that and it'sa question of control.
Is God's plan enough?
Can I help God's plan?
Can I tweak God's plan?
, what?
What's my part in that?
What I learned is that itwas just like we were talking
(20:44):
about, we're part of such abigger story than we have vision
to see, and that story is.
A story that is moreinterested in our destiny
than in our comfort.
And so when we say Godis in control, we're it's
(21:07):
God's plan is enough.
We have to wrestle withthings like disappointment
and waiting, which is a bigone in my story Failure.
When things don't happen, youget a bad test result or your
spouse leaves you or yourchild dies and trust, am I
still gonna trust in this plan?
(21:29):
That, to me, seems likeit's falling apart.
And that was the third questionand hard for me because I, I'm
a controller, I'm a planner.
And to say that God's plansenough and I'm just gonna
go with that . When you havea serious health diagnosis
or another problem that'sreally beyond your control,
(21:50):
you start to learn thatwhile maybe most of my life
I thought I was in control,I probably really wasn't.
When you wrestle with thatquestion of control and you're
looking at God's plan andyou're trying to be all in
you, you think about thingslike, am I wasting my life?
How do I know that onI'm on, God's plan and
(22:11):
that it's gonna be okay?
Because right now I justfeel like I'm on this
detour and maybe I'meven headed for a dead.
, I don't know.
And so that question was one ofthe more difficult ones for me.
I think just personality wise,I can certainly understand
that because I'm also alittle bit of a control freak.
Maybe not even just alittle bit, I really can
(22:33):
relate to that orient and Ithink a lot of people can.
In just a moment, Iwant to talk about how
people can get the book.
And I know that you.
Free offer for peopletoo, and we'll get to
that in just a moment.
But before we do, I think thatthere are some people listening
today who are strugglingwith some of these questions
and wrestling with them.
What advice would you giveto someone who's in the midst
(22:55):
of the struggle right now?
Things that seem like theydon't go together can be
true at the same time.
In other words, what'shappening to me can be true.
And God can still be good.
I can feel like I'm grievingover the loss of something
and I can still be gratefulfor something else.
(23:15):
I can be doubting and stillbe a faithful Christian.
For me one of the big one was,can I have been a Christian
for all of these years andstill have all these questions?
It was almost embarrassing.
And w what we do sometimesas Christians, because we w
(23:36):
don't want the questions, iswe put a bandaid over it and
we say things like, TrustGod and in God's timing or
choose joy, which are allgood things to think of.
As long as that's not wherewe stop, we have to go
deeper because we all knowthat when we put a bandaid
over a serious injury, itdoesn't really heal it.
(23:59):
It just keeps us from lookingat it . And if we peel back that
bandaid, , it's still there.
The injury is still there.
And what it really needsis sunlight and air
and room to breathe.
And our questionsare just like that.
We need to bring them outand let them breathe and give
(24:20):
them some air and sunlightand they'll start to heal.
And God has never, althoughwe think he, he doesn't like
questions, that's never been hisnature.
That's very true.
All right, Lorianne, tell usabout the book, how to Get
It, when's it coming out?
And I'll put links toeverything in the show notes.
(24:41):
Yes.
The book is coming out onFebruary 21st, and it's
called Divine Detour.
The path you'd never choosecan lead to the faith
you've always wanted.
It's it's a book of 40essays and it explores
these three questions.
The reason that I did them inessays is because I wanted them
(25:02):
to be, individuals standalonequestions and wanted the
reader to be able to resolvethat question, or at least
to be able to tackle thatquestion by itself before they
move on to a different essay.
And so they're standaloneessays, but they include some
of the really raw journalentries that I started in
(25:24):
the hospital, but they alsoinclude just stories from.
My childhood and, being amom and all the things that
everyone wrestles with.
So even if it's not ahealthy detour, you're on.
it would still be somethingthat would be beneficial.
You can get it by going tomy website@loriannwood.com
(25:48):
slash books and you can findall the information there.
That's great.
I'm definitely goingto check it out.
Very excited to havethe launch of a.
First book.
That's very exciting.
So congratulations toyou, and I know you said
that you had a free offerfor our listeners today.
Tell us about that.
One of the things I realized isthat when you're on a detour,
(26:11):
if you're like me and you haveall these questions, and before
you really are embracing thefact that I should be asking
these questions and talkingto God about, I was giving
God the silent treatment.
I was like, wow, I've beena Christian this long and
this is how you treat me.
I'm just gonna shut you out.
And I had a hard time prayingduring those early days.
(26:34):
Thankfully, I hadprayer warriors and
prayer chains going.
But I had a hard time prayingfor myself, and so I created
a resource that's called FivePrayers and Promises When You
Can't Talk to God, and it'savailable for anyone that
would like to check it out.
It's just a prayer startermaybe some scriptures.
(26:58):
A story and a link to someother resources that might be
helpful if you find yourselfin that situation, and
listeners can get that by goingto lori ann wood.com/hope.
That's great.
Lori ann wood.com/hope.
That's wonderful.
We all need hope, especiallywhen we're in the midst
(27:19):
of questions in turmoil.
Lori Ann, I cannot believethat our time is over.
It has just flown by.
Thank you so much for beingon Radical Abundance, and
I wish you a radicallyabundant day.
Thank you, Teresa.
It was wonderful.
Welcome to Radical Abundance.
I'm your host, Teresa Janssen.
You know what it's like?
Your life is going justthe way you want, and
suddenly there's a detour.
Today's guest is Lori AnnWood, and she's written a book
about those divine detours.
She's experienced adivine detour as a result
of a medical crisis.
We're gonna hear all aboutthe story and how it can lead
(00:26):
to even an extraordinary.
Welcome to Radical Abundance.
Lori, it's great tohave you on the show.
Thank you, Teresa.
It's so great to be here.
I'm excited.
Okay, Lori Ann, let'sstart off with that story.
What happened?
What was the big detourin your life that led you
eventually to write thisbook that'll come out in
February?
(00:47):
I had a shocking diagnosis, andit was about seven years ago.
I.
. The funny part about it wasI had a medical evaluation
and I was told that I hadless than 3% chance of ever
developing heart diseasebecause I had great cholesterol,
(01:07):
I had low blood pressure.
All my numbers were good.
I had no family history.
I had no lifestyle riskfactors, so I was a good bet
for not getting heart disease.
But then three weeks afterthat evaluation, . I was
in cardiac intensive carewith end stage heart failure
(01:29):
from an unknown cause.
I was broadsided.
, of course.
And what I had done is Iwas just feeling sluggish.
I didn't have any energy.
I felt like I had the flu.
I had no idea thatwas, there was anything
wrong with my heart.
That was the last thingon my list of things that
(01:52):
could be wrong with me.
And I went to my pcp, my familydoctor, and the words that he
said to me, I knew they weregonna be significant, but
I didn't know in what way.
But he listened to my heartand did all the things he
could do in the office.
And then he said, if we'relucky, it's pneumonia.
(02:13):
and my husband was with me.
And I remember looking athim thinking that was worst
case, that it was pneumonia.
And my doctor took me rightto get a chest x-ray and
found that my heart wasenlarged very enlarged.
And it was actuallyfunctioning at about 6%.
(02:34):
, I was just, I was direct,admitted into I C U from
that doctor's office, and Ispent 14 days there in I C U.
I had, d defibrillator padsstuck to my chest and a crash
cart right outside my door and.
. I just functioned there.
We lived in I C U fora couple of weeks.
(02:54):
They didn't want me togo home at that point
because they didn't thinkI could survive at home.
We didn't know this at thetime, but later learned.
, she probably won'tsurvive at home.
And once I left the hospital,I had an external defibrillator
vest on and I wore that 24hours a day for nine months and
(03:14):
within a couple of weeks flownto Cleveland Clinic and met with
the head of transplant there.
And I.
She told me recently, sheactually wrote the forward to my
book, but she told me recentlythat I was her most critical
patient for a year and a half.
And she was on pins and needlesthat whole time, and I was
(03:36):
just wearing my life vest,taking these high-powered
meds and holding on.
And then we would go inevery once in a while to get
evaluated and check my heartfunction and nothing happened.
I never improved.
In fact, I went 16 monthswith no improvement.
I did get an internal devicewithin that 16 months, but
(03:58):
still didn't really getany measurable improve.
And then out of nowhere really,I went in for something else
and they tested my heartand my heart function was
restored to normal at about16 months post-diagnosis.
To tell you the truth, Ithought that was my story.
(04:20):
I thought my story wasone of divine healing and
God's care and provision.
I was gonna tell that storyand that was gonna be what
God had in mind for my life.
But three years ago, myheart function dropped and
(04:40):
I found myself in activeheart failure again.
And I've learned throughthe course of this disease
and dealing with its effectsis that heart failure is a
chronic progressive disease.
For most people, medicalscience can manage the symptoms
with devices and medicationsand lifestyle changes.
(05:02):
For some, they can slow theprogression, but there really
is not a cure, and it reallyonly goes in one direction.
So right now I'm holdingsteady at a lower heart.
. And what I have found duringthat time is that I have taken
(05:23):
some risks and I have steppedout in ways that I wouldn't have
done in a safer, healthier life.
And so I was ableto write this book.
It was born at my diagnosis,but it's not primarily
about the medical events.
It's really a guide forpeople to confront question.
(05:44):
, I hear so much going on inyour story right now, and at
the time that you had thisdivine detour enter your
life, this medical crisis.
Of course, you have a lotof things going through your
mind, but you said that atthe time you didn't even
recognize where it was going.
You thought your story wasgoing to be that of divine
healing, yet a heart condit.
(06:07):
Is a chronic disease thatgoes one direction, not
towards healing, but towardsa steady decline, really.
So the story wasn't about thephysical, it was more spiritual
and it led you to the questions.
In fact, you told me therewere three questions that
we all have to answer.
Tell me more about thosethree questions and how.
(06:28):
even came to that.
There were three questionsI started writing.
Someone dropped off a journalearly on in my ICU room and
I was writing like lists ofpeople I need to write thank
you notes to, or reminders.
I still had kids at homereminder to, do this at
school or whatever it waswhile I was in the hospital
(06:49):
and my husband at one point.
We should be writing thisdown, or you should be
taking notes about what youknow, the what's going on.
And I didn't want to,because I didn't ever wanna
relive what was going on,but I started to write it
down and then those notesstarted to grow into a blog.
And then those blogsgrew into articles.
(07:11):
And then the articlesgrew into this book.
And what I found as I waswriting is that everything I
was wrestling, Was fallen intothese three categories or these
three questions, and the moreI studied about it and wrestled
with it, the more I realizedthat everyone is on a detour.
Because if you think aboutit, a detour is just,
(07:34):
you're going along on thisplanned route and all of a
sudden you can't anymore.
You're forced off of it.
It's not a choice you make.
You're forced off of it andit's not the prettiest road
or maybe the smoothest roador the most convenient road,
or even the shortest wayto get to your destination.
(07:58):
And that's what happens toall of us at some point.
And while we're on thatdetour, we start this
questioning process andthose three questions that
came out of it are the.
questions that Jesus hadto have wrestled with in
the desert when he facedthose three temptations.
(08:20):
The, there's a couple of placesin scripture where it talks
about Jesus going to the desert,but in Matthew chapter four,
the first time when Jesus,or the first temptation that
Jesus faced in the desertwas when the enemy said,
tell these stones to become.
If I'm thinking, if I'm Jesus,I'm thinking I'm really hungry.
I would love for thosestones to become bread.
(08:42):
Now, is that what I should do?
Is my survival and myphysical wellbeing the most
important thing in my life?
Because if it is, I should justgo ahead and eat that bread.
And that became to me a questionthat I call a question of worry.
(09:03):
and we all face that.
We wonder is this lifeall there is because that
reorders our priorities ifit is all there is, and I
think Jesus wrestled withthat as a man at that moment
with the enemy in the desert.
And we all do when we'redetoured into the desert
(09:24):
and we have physicalpain or relational.
We wonder if we need tojust be concerned with
our immediate life.
One of the things that cameout of it for me when I looked
at that question of worry,was I really had to be honest
with myself because I learnedthat my faith actually had
(09:45):
me at the center of it andmy wellbeing at the center of
it, and that was something Ineeded to work on and change.
But that question, helped tobring that to my attention.
Thiscame to you later, though, not
while you were in I C U, eventhough the journey started
there, you started, it was aprogressive revelation that
(10:05):
there were three questions.
At the point in time, youstarted questioning about
your life, your physicallife, and worrying about
those types of things.
What.
Did it make, when you beganto answer that question for
yourself, there were somany little sub-questions.
I would say within that questionof worry, things like loss
(10:28):
and uncertainty and fear andregret, which I explore all
of those in the book, but Iwas coming to terms with is
there something more valuable?
They were telling me I had avery short amount of time, so is
there something more valuable?
Than just this immediate life.
Does God have somethingmore for me than just this
(10:50):
moment in what I can see?
I had been a Christian aslong as I can remember.
. But until I really faced thatupfront and really up close,
I hadn't really come to aconclusion about that in, in
the way that my heart was.
I think I still wantedeverything to resolve just
(11:11):
right for me, and it isjust the human condition.
I think in Jesus's example whenhe didn't do that and he could.
that was for me, something thatI started to learn about and
really changed my perspective.
Lorianne.
What I think is reallysignificant here is that you
were a person of faith evenat that time when you're
(11:34):
questioning, and oftentimesI think Christians really
feel guilty when theystart to question or worry
because we are told to havefaith and trust in God.
Yet Jesus himself faced thisquestion in the wilderness.
Of course he was, he'sperfect, but also as human.
How did you feel at that time?
(11:55):
, did you feel guilty as aChristian facing those doubts
and worrying about your lifeor were you able to just
say, you know that I havea relationship with God?
That's okay.
That I worry, I struggledwith questions.
I felt like that maybe was thereason that I wasn't getting
those first 16 months, and therewas no improvement I thought.
(12:19):
I don't have enough faith.
I'm not strong enough.
I'm letting my prayer warriorsdown that were praying
for me around the clock.
And I didn't realize atthe time how much questions
can strengthen your faithbecause I've learned over
those months and now years,that when we poke and prod
(12:42):
and question and wrestl.
, our faith gets stronger andit gets more defined, and
we can get our hands on it.
We choose God again and again,and we don't just choose him
once and put him on a shelf.
That to me, was the value ofthose questions is that it
(13:04):
was on my mind all the time.
He was on my mind.
My faith was on my mind all thetime because, Those questions
were nagging, and I thinksometimes, like you said, we
shy away from questions or thinkthat reflects badly on us, or
that God would be disappointedwith a question or other
people might be disappointed.
(13:24):
But in reality, Thequestions are what keeps
us bringing us back to him.
I can, I think that'scompletely true because a
faith that doesn't questionis a faith that doesn't grow.
But also those questionsshow that we are reasoning
and struggling and workingout our faith and not just
blindly accepting or buildingour faith on tradition.
(13:48):
Or family or our, thefaith of our parents.
When we struggle and really workthrough those issues, we come
out of it with a faith that'sproven and tested, and I think
that's really important and youfound a stronger faith on the
other side of those questions.
.
Yes.
And that reminds me of somethingthat I really clung to during
(14:10):
that time is that, the oppositeof faith we think of as
doubt, but really the oppositeof faith is indifference.
It's just walking away andsaying, I'm done with it.
I'm washing my hands of it.
I don't want anythingto do with it.
But when we doubt, whichhappens to be question number
two, , but when we doubt, webring him up again and again.
(14:33):
And he doesn't shyaway from that.
And scripture plays that outwith job and so many other
examples we have where wecan, questioning God's not
gonna punish us or back away.
He wants to just keepthat conversation going.
And so that was, like I said,that was the second question
(14:54):
because when Jesus wentinto the desert, that first
question was about tell thesestones to become breaded.
But the second question was,or the second temptation
was, throw yourself down andthe angels will protect you.
Float throw caution to thewind because God will not
let his beloved be harm.
(15:16):
. If he let you be harmed,then he must not love you.
He must have abandoned you.
And we formulate thisquestion in our mind.
Is God always good?
Because what's happeningin my life right now
doesn't feel good.
It doesn't feel like love.
(15:37):
Can I know that it is love?
Even when it doesn'tfeel like it is.
God always.
Good.
So I looked at things likeprotection and resilience
and vulnerability, and reallystarted to dig down into
whether the, my current pain,does my current pain indicate
(16:02):
God's level of care for.
Is that on par?
Just because I'm in pain,does that mean God is mad at
me or God is punishing me, orGod's turned his face from me?
And why doesn't, if he is aGod of love all the time, why
doesn't this feel like love?
One of the things that Ilearned is that God never
(16:24):
promised us that we won'texperience the worst that
this world has to offer.
But he did promise that ifwe do, we won't be alone.
And that's the, that is worthso much more than not having
the trouble in the first place.
Lorianne, one of thebiggest questions that.
(16:47):
, I've heard people say, keepsthem from faith is that
question of if God is good,why do bad things happen?
Or if God is powerful, whydoes he allow good things
or bad things to happen?
Why doesn't he intervene?
And so again, it's a questionwe can't shy away from because
we know this is a fallen worldand that there are bad things
(17:08):
that are going to happen.
It's not a question.
God allowing bad things tohappen, but it's a question
of the result of living in aworld that is dominated by sin
and yet God is sovereign, andhow do we come to a place of
being able to reconcile that?
(17:29):
in our own faith.
And how did that work outfor you, where you're going
through this real crisisand saying, God, why?
That's the bigquestion, isn't it?
When we're in themidst of it, why?
Where did you find that answer?
That was a big part ofit is why, and I think
as human beings, wewant things to resolve.
(17:49):
We want to know a reason,and we're thinking
people and creatures and.
Know enough to knowthat we don't know and
it really bothers us.
So I think what I'verealized is that God is
always a God of healing.
Sometimes he's heals on thisside of eternity, but he
(18:12):
always heals in the next.
And we look at our part ofthe story, we're all just one
little part of this huge storythat God's writing and we
look at our part of the story.
And we want it toresolve in our lifetime.
And I think about the peopleyou know who didn't have that
(18:34):
resolved in their lifetime.
The apostles, Stephen John theBaptist, those stories did not
make sense in their lifetime,but they're part of this
bigger story arc and so are we.
So we have to realize.
We can't it'd be like readingone chapter of a book and
(18:57):
thinking that you couldunderstand the entire story
by reading one chapter.
And we don't get the, a lotof times, and maybe most of
us won't see the completed endof our story in our lifetime.
But that doesn't meanthat God is not good.
It doesn't mean that hewon't work out everything
for the good of his people.
(19:18):
It just means that in ourlifetime we not, we might
not make sense of it.
I love that.
Idea and especially relatingit to the idea of reading
one chapter in a bookand thinking that we'll
see the whole story arc.
Because we do just havea limited perspective and
we don't know where ourstory even intersects in
(19:39):
the lives of stories andpeople that we may not even.
Directly encounter that theremay be indirect encounters,
that God has the biggerpicture, and he's a big enough
God to accept our questions,our worries, our doubts.
And that brings me lorianne.
What's question number three?
(19:59):
Question number three, if youremember the account of Jesus
in the desert facing the enemy.
The third temptation in Matthewwas, Bow down to me and all of
these kingdoms will be yours.
What that meant for Jesuswas, I know what God's plan
is, but maybe there's abetter plan, or maybe God's
(20:22):
plan's not quite enough.
And we do that and it'sa question of control.
Is God's plan enough?
Can I help God's plan?
Can I tweak God's plan?
, what?
What's my part in that?
What I learned is that itwas just like we were talking
(20:44):
about, we're part of such abigger story than we have vision
to see, and that story is.
A story that is moreinterested in our destiny
than in our comfort.
And so when we say Godis in control, we're it's
(21:07):
God's plan is enough.
We have to wrestle withthings like disappointment
and waiting, which is a bigone in my story Failure.
When things don't happen, youget a bad test result or your
spouse leaves you or yourchild dies and trust, am I
still gonna trust in this plan?
(21:29):
That, to me, seems likeit's falling apart.
And that was the third questionand hard for me because I, I'm
a controller, I'm a planner.
And to say that God's plansenough and I'm just gonna
go with that . When you havea serious health diagnosis
or another problem that'sreally beyond your control,
(21:50):
you start to learn thatwhile maybe most of my life
I thought I was in control,I probably really wasn't.
When you wrestle with thatquestion of control and you're
looking at God's plan andyou're trying to be all in
you, you think about thingslike, am I wasting my life?
How do I know that onI'm on, God's plan and
(22:11):
that it's gonna be okay?
Because right now I justfeel like I'm on this
detour and maybe I'meven headed for a dead.
, I don't know.
And so that question was one ofthe more difficult ones for me.
I think just personality wise,I can certainly understand
that because I'm also alittle bit of a control freak.
Maybe not even just alittle bit, I really can
(22:33):
relate to that orient and Ithink a lot of people can.
In just a moment, Iwant to talk about how
people can get the book.
And I know that you.
Free offer for peopletoo, and we'll get to
that in just a moment.
But before we do, I think thatthere are some people listening
today who are strugglingwith some of these questions
and wrestling with them.
What advice would you giveto someone who's in the midst
(22:55):
of the struggle right now?
Things that seem like theydon't go together can be
true at the same time.
In other words, what'shappening to me can be true.
And God can still be good.
I can feel like I'm grievingover the loss of something
and I can still be gratefulfor something else.
(23:15):
I can be doubting and stillbe a faithful Christian.
For me one of the big one was,can I have been a Christian
for all of these years andstill have all these questions?
It was almost embarrassing.
And w what we do sometimesas Christians, because we w
(23:36):
don't want the questions, iswe put a bandaid over it and
we say things like, TrustGod and in God's timing or
choose joy, which are allgood things to think of.
As long as that's not wherewe stop, we have to go
deeper because we all knowthat when we put a bandaid
over a serious injury, itdoesn't really heal it.
(23:59):
It just keeps us from lookingat it . And if we peel back that
bandaid, , it's still there.
The injury is still there.
And what it really needsis sunlight and air
and room to breathe.
And our questionsare just like that.
We need to bring them outand let them breathe and give
(24:20):
them some air and sunlightand they'll start to heal.
And God has never, althoughwe think he, he doesn't like
questions, that's never been hisnature.
That's very true.
All right, Lorianne, tell usabout the book, how to Get
It, when's it coming out?
And I'll put links toeverything in the show notes.
(24:41):
Yes.
The book is coming out onFebruary 21st, and it's
called Divine Detour.
The path you'd never choosecan lead to the faith
you've always wanted.
It's it's a book of 40essays and it explores
these three questions.
The reason that I did them inessays is because I wanted them
(25:02):
to be, individuals standalonequestions and wanted the
reader to be able to resolvethat question, or at least
to be able to tackle thatquestion by itself before they
move on to a different essay.
And so they're standaloneessays, but they include some
of the really raw journalentries that I started in
(25:24):
the hospital, but they alsoinclude just stories from.
My childhood and, being amom and all the things that
everyone wrestles with.
So even if it's not ahealthy detour, you're on.
it would still be somethingthat would be beneficial.
You can get it by going tomy website@loriannwood.com
(25:48):
slash books and you can findall the information there.
That's great.
I'm definitely goingto check it out.
Very excited to havethe launch of a.
First book.
That's very exciting.
So congratulations toyou, and I know you said
that you had a free offerfor our listeners today.
Tell us about that.
One of the things I realized isthat when you're on a detour,
(26:11):
if you're like me and you haveall these questions, and before
you really are embracing thefact that I should be asking
these questions and talkingto God about, I was giving
God the silent treatment.
I was like, wow, I've beena Christian this long and
this is how you treat me.
I'm just gonna shut you out.
And I had a hard time prayingduring those early days.
(26:34):
Thankfully, I hadprayer warriors and
prayer chains going.
But I had a hard time prayingfor myself, and so I created
a resource that's called FivePrayers and Promises When You
Can't Talk to God, and it'savailable for anyone that
would like to check it out.
It's just a prayer startermaybe some scriptures.
(26:58):
A story and a link to someother resources that might be
helpful if you find yourselfin that situation, and
listeners can get that by goingto lori ann wood.com/hope.
That's great.
Lori ann wood.com/hope.
That's wonderful.
We all need hope, especiallywhen we're in the midst
(27:19):
of questions in turmoil.
Lori Ann, I cannot believethat our time is over.
It has just flown by.
Thank you so much for beingon Radical Abundance, and
I wish you a radicallyabundant day.
Thank you, Teresa.
It was wonderful.
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