October 16, 2022 • 20 mins
Teresa Janzen is talking with Jodi Thomas, a health and wellness coach, author, and adoptive mom. Jodi had a vision of how her family would look, but that’s not what happened. She soon had to face the reality of attachment disorder and other family challenges. God gave her a vision of a bird with broken wings. Listen in as we see God work more than one miracle in this family.
Jodi Thomas is familiar with life’s challenges. She and her husband, Peter, of over 30 years have faced many. They have stories of heartbreak to heart mending from adoption, infertility, illness, incarceration, and more. Despite life not working out the way she planned, she is passionate about sharing God’s hope, health and the abundant life available to women.
Connect with Jodi at: https://jodithomas.net
Connect with Teresa at https://teresajanzen.com
Learn more about Radical Abundance at Radical-Abundance.com
Teresa Janzen is your host. She ignites a passion for abundant living through radical service. Teresa is an international speaker, author, and coach of speakers and writers. Her experience in leadership and global ministry drives her to share inspiring stories with wit and insight. Her candid and personable style is sure to capture the heart of any audience.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:04):
Welcome to Radical Abundance.
I'm your host, TeresaJanzen, and today's
guest is Jodi Thomas.
Jodi is a health and wellnesscoach as well as a hope
dealer, and she knows allabout what it is to have
hope, because she first had tofind the one who gives hope.
Jodi, welcome toRadical Abundance.
(00:24):
It's great to haveyou on the show today.
It's great to be here.
Thanks for having me.
Theres.
Well, I want to just jumpright into your story because
I know anyone who can describethemselves as a hope dealer
and has, who has found purposein their life, their physical
life as a health and wellnesscoach, their spiritual
(00:44):
life, their emotional life.
It's never just happens.
There's always a journeythat takes people.
To that point.
So take us back a bit to thebeginning of that journey before
you had it all together and werethe totally collected and with
it woman I see before me today.
(01:04):
What was life likefor you back then?
Well, Life didn't turn outthe way I planned.
And one thing I wannatalk about is 25 years ago
we adopted two children.
My husband was a pastor of aninner city church in Nebraska.
And We had a dog, he was aChinese char, and we kept
(01:26):
him out on our fun porch andwe met our kids that way.
So never underestimatethe power of a dog.
God needs our dog to bringour two kids into our lives.
And long story short, we knewthem for several years and
we tried to help the birthmom for several years, get
treatment for various issues,and then when they were
(01:49):
homeless and they were gonna.
Have to go into foster care.
God led me to write a word,picture that about a bird, birds
and a mama bird taking care ofher baby birds and teaching how
to fly in the nest was the bestway for these kids to succeed.
And God used that word pictureto lead these kids to us.
(02:11):
And it's been a long journey.
And there, therewas some hopeless.
At times, but I'm here to sharethe hope of persevering through
what God has called you to do.
So the adoption journey Iknow can be one with a lot of
ups and downs, and a lot ofdifferent people experience
(02:32):
that at different stages,and it's very different.
Of course, every family isunique and every adoptive family
is also unique and there'sa difference between adopt.
A child as an infant,and as an older child.
Just share with us a bitmore about your journey.
Sure.
Well, I think what we wentinto it blindly, naively,
(02:54):
and especially because itwas a different avenue to
adoption, we knew the kidsand so I did not expect a
rejection, and especiallytowards a female because they
feel loyal to their birth mom.
So I just didn't experiencethat cuddly Welcome as an
Adopt a Mom that I thoughtthere was a lot of rejection.
(03:15):
There was chaos cuz thekids were just never
really had a stable home.
And looking back I realized justhow broken they were that had
broken hearts and broken wings.
And I wish I released thoseexpectations in hindsight.
And, I did serve him and lovehim, but I think if I had just
more realistic expectations,it would've been easier.
(03:38):
So there was just a lot of chaosand I remember taking them to
a counselor and the teacherwanted me to take our daughter
to a counselor to get assessedfor adhd, and they did have,
ADHD learning disabilities.
But I said to this counselor,I said, Do you think I'm
crazy for adopting these kids?
(03:58):
And her response was just whatI needed to hear at that time.
She said crazy.
You is what theworld needs more of.
And it was just an encouragementthat, that God brought these
kids into her life and wejust had to keep at it.
But there was then I tookthem, another counselor, and
it finally, they explainedattachment disorder to
me and just a lot of.
(04:19):
Things that our kids,experiences from unprocessed
trauma and their brokennessknow is just acted out in
the home of, not trusting,lying, stealing and it can
make the adoptive parentsfeel hopeless and angry
and depressed at times.
And I know parenting in generalis hard, but I wanna encourage.
People out there who wannagive up just to hang in
there cuz I'll get towhere we are today later.
(04:41):
Jody, that's a reallydangerous question that
you asked and anytime youask someone am I crazy too?
There . I know thatyou're thinking that.
What am I doing?
What did I get myself into?
Yeah.
And you talked aboutexpectations and Word about
expectations that I thinkleads people to a lot of
(05:05):
disappointment, frustration,all of those things.
We design what we thinkour family is going to
look like, what our familyshould look like, and how
people are going to behave.
We make that all up inour mind, and then when it
doesn't come out that way,that can be really hard.
(05:26):
And so what was your initialresponse to that in the
context of your family?
What did that look?
I think angry and which isreally, hurt is underneath
anger that I let fester asbitterness and hopelessness.
And I think, we're both allabout living abundantly, John
10 10, But the first partis that the thief comes to
(05:47):
steal, kill, and destroy.
But Jesus came togive us abundant life.
But I think I've been stuckin that bitter mode because
of my expectations and hurt.
But thanks be to God.
I'm not there now.
But it, it was very tough times.
And just when our dreams,I think we all have broken
dreams and broken hearts,and that can lead to bitterness.
(06:07):
So, Jody, when you saythat things got difficult,
give us an example.
Tell us a little.
How difficult you mean whenyou say things got difficult?
For when our son turned 19,instead of going to his high
school graduation, he endedup in the county jail, which
was right down the streetfrom the church where my
husband was a pastor at.
(06:28):
And that was very difficult.
He start, started hangingaround the wrong crowd and his
11th year of high school and Idid my best to try to fix him
and keep him out of trouble.
And, Sadly, he ended up inthe New Jersey Department of
Corrections where I had tovisit him through the plexiglass
and his orange outfit.
It was crushing seeing him with.
(06:50):
The shackles on his wristand behind his back, and
I didn't get to hug orhold him for four years.
We didn't get a familypicture for four years,
and it was very crushing.
My hopes and dreams werecrushed by those prison
doors and this sweet littleboy who we met through
our dog when he was five.
It just in my mind,didn't belong there.
(07:11):
But so my heart was broken then.
But God he's donewonderfully today.
I have to wonder, being apastor, family, pastor's,
wife, pastor kids, even though,they're adoptive and all that
stuff, there still can be alot of pressure in the church.
What was the response fromyour church family as well as
(07:34):
the general Christian family?
I'd say it was mixed.
But we did get a lot of support.
And there, there were otherfamilies in the church too
who had birth children whowere in the same prison.
And I think some people, didjudge us, but I think God did
put people who understood that.
In one of our churches,there was another family
(07:55):
who had adopted children andwho had struggled as well.
So I think there was support,although, I still think some
judge us cuz people don't reallyunderstand, that we didn't have
'em from birth and how, justthat there's a different set
of issues we were dealing with.
God gave us Godwings along the way.
At one point I, this wasway back in the beginning.
(08:17):
On Valentine's Day, Igot a package from my
mother-in-law's bible study.
She sends a care package.
Just cards.
And one card said,Stick with it.
In 10 years you'llbe glad you did it.
One person sent $20, go get someice cream for a family together.
And so it just, God gavelittle encouraging things,
even though, things weretough and some people didn't
(08:38):
always support and understand.
But there, there weremany people who did
pray and encourage us.
So that was.
Well, I'm glad that you hadsome people who were encouraging
along the way, and one of thethings I had to learn myself the
hard way when it comes to ourchurch family is that each and
every person is at a differentpoint in their journey, and
(09:03):
their expectations also arethere and are interfering
with their relationships andthings like that sometimes.
And so when someone.
Doesn't respond the way thatyou anticipate that they may.
We have to remember thatthey're on their journey and
they are learning somethingthrough the process, and
(09:24):
we might be a part of that.
I've certainly hadexperiences even with my
kids who were not adopted.
I had them from birth, so Iwas their primary influence
and still, of course, they makechoices that are not the choices
I would've liked for them to.
They're human beings andthey're individual human beings
(09:46):
who have free will and willmake their own journey, and
that's part of their road thatGod will deal with them on.
And as a parent, oftentimes we.
Feel like our success orfailure as a parent is based
on our children's choices.
. And that's just nottrue, especially as
(10:10):
our kids get older.
So I'm glad that God gave yousome of those God wings, but
tell me a little bit more abouthow that journey then progressed
from that point, and how arethings going now in your family?
Sure.
So I remember sitting in churchand I, we had a guest preach
for, my husband didn't preachand our son had just kept
(10:31):
making worse and worse sit.
He kept ha gettingchances in the legal situ.
Legal situationsand kept messing up.
And then he ended in prisonand my heart just kept getting
broken and broken again.
And I remember justsaying, That's it.
I'm gonna give up cuzI can't stand the pain.
And this pastor looked at meduring a sermon and said, Some
of you wanna give up on yourkids and I'm telling you don't.
(10:54):
And like you said, it justnot only just adoptive.
Parenting, but justparents in general, kids
are gonna be frustrating.
And I wanted to give up, butGod just said, Surrender him
to me, but don't give up.
So we supported him and Iactually had to quit my job.
My husband was serving as apastor in South Dakota, so
we, I moved back to New Jerseyfor six months and helped him.
(11:18):
Graduate from intensivesupervised parole program,
whereas if he failed,he would've gone to
prison for four years.
. But through the grace ofGod and lots of prayers and
support, he graduated and movedout to South Dakota with us,
and now fast forward severalyears, he is a wonderful
husband, a wonderful father.
He has a three year old redhead.
(11:40):
We have a three year oldredheaded granddaughter.
And it's just wonderful to see.
He wrote a beautiful thingon my husband's Facebook
wall for Father's Day,just about thanking.
Thank you for adopting me.
Thank you for making meinto the man and father
and husband I am today.
So I just thankGod, but it took.
Took many years toget to that point.
(12:00):
We had to persevere andnot quit and surrender.
But I thank God thathe's doing so well today.
I think there are parentsout there listening to this
today who feel like theyhave not heard those words.
Thank you.
And that can be hard.
It's a hard season of parenthoodwhen you feel like, yes.
(12:23):
You are sacrificing a lotand you are giving a lot,
and you are trying yourbest and maybe not perfect,
but you're really trying.
, think it's important to hearfrom someone like you who
eventually the thank youcomes eventually, it sinks in
and so there's hope and yes.
(12:43):
How do you hold onuntil you get there?
Yeah, well I think we, wegotta hold on to God and look
at what God has done for us.
I had one counselor, tellme I had to relinquish
and surrender them.
So I already mentioned that,just how to continually
surrender your kids Lord.
But also, for me, Ijust wanna fix and.
(13:05):
Just to surrender, but becareful about not being
good dependent because I'vebeen there too, but just
surrendering and supporting.
But another counselorsaid, just that we adopted
these kids like God.
God adopts us as his children.
And I just wanted touchbriefly on What happened
with our daughter when shewas in her early twenties,
(13:26):
and that seems to be a toughtime for kids in general when
I've talked to biologicalparents or adoptive parents.
So we came down tosee our daughter.
And we hadn't seen her andwe wanted to take her to the
movies and go out to dinnerand she did not show up.
So it was rejection again,we were there and we wanted
(13:48):
to do something with her.
And I just remember cryingin church and because
I just felt like ourlove was rejected again.
And it's amazing that throughthat time, God Wink was.
Was leading me through aBible study on Jose and his
redeeming love for his people,and again, encouraged me just
(14:09):
the right time that we needto keep loving Christina.
Like we had to keep loving ourson and not giving up on her.
And it really was a period ofabout five years where we were
very disconnected and did notsee her very much, did not
have a relationship with her.
And again hanging therefor parents who are going
(14:30):
through this, cuz thatwas the early twenties.
Now they're both in the earlythirties and we live an hour
from our daughter Christina.
And our granddaughter,she's an eight year old
and we just spent yesterdayraspberry picking with them.
And we talk severaltimes a week.
So again, that's a very shortoverview of just the difficulty
it's been, but how God hasbrought us through that.
(14:52):
And I think just looking to Godand what he's done for us and.
Staying true andpersevering when with
circumstances that are tough.
They say that love is a twoway street, sometimes it's not.
Sometimes it only goes one way.
Yeah.
And so, or it might be twoway, but it's not going
both ways at the same time.
Yeah.
And you have, and the way,it's not 50 50, it's a
(15:15):
hundred percent in there,or 110% in there when you
choose to love someone.
And it's, it can't beconditional based on them
loving you back and yet.
, tell me, Jody, how do youkeep from being a doormat in
the middle of all of this?
Yes.
Good point.
I think just, I have somegood friends who supported me
(15:35):
and talking with it, but alsojust, we need to, The serenity
of prayer is so important.
We do need to take care ofourselves and have that life
from God pour into us and help.
Plugging into God's strengthand surrounding ourselves
with support and, and justpraying to see, okay, where
am I, need to take care ofmyself along with parenting.
(15:57):
So I think just, just takingcare of yourself and finding fun
things to do and finding peopleto pour into you and plugging
into the power of God andletting God can obviously get
your strength and hope from him.
Well, I like what you saidabout taking care of yourself
and I don't know this cuz youand I haven't talked about
it, but it was all of thispart of where you really got
(16:17):
tuned into the whole healthand wellness area also has,
did this journey impact yourgoals and helping people
really take charge of theirphysical health in the midst?
Difficult circumstances.
Yeah, exactly.
I'm a health coach.
I've been in the health andwellness field over 20 years.
But I do wanna say that inhindsight, I think the stress
(16:40):
of trying to control thekids and trying to control a
situation if I had surrenderedit before and really letting
go of things that I couldn'tThat the stress of the kids
impacted my health negativelySo part of my passion for
health now is to as a healthcoach and being a personal
trainer, I've been the healthand wellness field for 20 years.
(17:01):
But part of it really is themindset and releasing that
stress and focusing on God.
Cuz it, it was very, itis difficult going through
very stressful situationsand not having it affect
your health negatively.
Because it does it.
It's not good for ourhealth and we try to
control things we can't.
?
That's right.
Absolutely.
It's not good for our health.
(17:22):
Well, I can't believe thatour time has just about come
to an end, but I want to giveyou an opportunity to deal a
little bit of hope before we go.
What do you wannaleave us with today?
Well, I wanna leaveyou with Psalm 34 18.
The Lord is close to thebrokenhearted and saves
those who question spirit.
Several years ago, our daughterwrote on her Facebook wall.
(17:45):
Thank you mom and dad for beingthe best parents I could ask for
and for teaching me how to fly.
. And so that goes backto the beginning.
Sorry, I still gettears in my eyes.
Just that when God's calledyou, if you're in a time of
suffering where you need topersevere or just, in, in a
circumstance that you feelover your head, just surrender.
Never quit.
(18:06):
And let God healyour broken heart.
And remember, Hebrew six 19,we have this hope as an anchor
for the soul firm, insecure.
I do wanna say just I'mlooking forward to reading
your book, Radical Abundanceand all the stories of hope
and healing, cuz God, weneed to cling to his hope in
tough times and know that wecan live abundantly despite
(18:26):
the storms and challenges.
He has an abundance of a radicalabundance of hope for us.
And Jody, I do wish youa radically abundant day.
I hope you find that today, andyou have certainly brought some
radical hope into our lives.
Thank you.
Amen.
Thank you.
You too, Theresa.
Thank you.
(18:47):
You know that book thatJodi was just talking about?
Well, it's available right now.
Just head over tothere, janssen.com and
check out the bookshop.
Welcome to Radical Abundance.
I'm your host, TeresaJanzen, and today's
guest is Jodi Thomas.
Jodi is a health and wellnesscoach as well as a hope
dealer, and she knows allabout what it is to have
hope, because she first had tofind the one who gives hope.
Jodi, welcome toRadical Abundance.
(00:24):
It's great to haveyou on the show today.
It's great to be here.
Thanks for having me.
Theres.
Well, I want to just jumpright into your story because
I know anyone who can describethemselves as a hope dealer
and has, who has found purposein their life, their physical
life as a health and wellnesscoach, their spiritual
(00:44):
life, their emotional life.
It's never just happens.
There's always a journeythat takes people.
To that point.
So take us back a bit to thebeginning of that journey before
you had it all together and werethe totally collected and with
it woman I see before me today.
(01:04):
What was life likefor you back then?
Well, Life didn't turn outthe way I planned.
And one thing I wannatalk about is 25 years ago
we adopted two children.
My husband was a pastor of aninner city church in Nebraska.
And We had a dog, he was aChinese char, and we kept
(01:26):
him out on our fun porch andwe met our kids that way.
So never underestimatethe power of a dog.
God needs our dog to bringour two kids into our lives.
And long story short, we knewthem for several years and
we tried to help the birthmom for several years, get
treatment for various issues,and then when they were
(01:49):
homeless and they were gonna.
Have to go into foster care.
God led me to write a word,picture that about a bird, birds
and a mama bird taking care ofher baby birds and teaching how
to fly in the nest was the bestway for these kids to succeed.
And God used that word pictureto lead these kids to us.
(02:11):
And it's been a long journey.
And there, therewas some hopeless.
At times, but I'm here to sharethe hope of persevering through
what God has called you to do.
So the adoption journey Iknow can be one with a lot of
ups and downs, and a lot ofdifferent people experience
(02:32):
that at different stages,and it's very different.
Of course, every family isunique and every adoptive family
is also unique and there'sa difference between adopt.
A child as an infant,and as an older child.
Just share with us a bitmore about your journey.
Sure.
Well, I think what we wentinto it blindly, naively,
(02:54):
and especially because itwas a different avenue to
adoption, we knew the kidsand so I did not expect a
rejection, and especiallytowards a female because they
feel loyal to their birth mom.
So I just didn't experiencethat cuddly Welcome as an
Adopt a Mom that I thoughtthere was a lot of rejection.
(03:15):
There was chaos cuz thekids were just never
really had a stable home.
And looking back I realized justhow broken they were that had
broken hearts and broken wings.
And I wish I released thoseexpectations in hindsight.
And, I did serve him and lovehim, but I think if I had just
more realistic expectations,it would've been easier.
(03:38):
So there was just a lot of chaosand I remember taking them to
a counselor and the teacherwanted me to take our daughter
to a counselor to get assessedfor adhd, and they did have,
ADHD learning disabilities.
But I said to this counselor,I said, Do you think I'm
crazy for adopting these kids?
(03:58):
And her response was just whatI needed to hear at that time.
She said crazy.
You is what theworld needs more of.
And it was just an encouragementthat, that God brought these
kids into her life and wejust had to keep at it.
But there was then I tookthem, another counselor, and
it finally, they explainedattachment disorder to
me and just a lot of.
(04:19):
Things that our kids,experiences from unprocessed
trauma and their brokennessknow is just acted out in
the home of, not trusting,lying, stealing and it can
make the adoptive parentsfeel hopeless and angry
and depressed at times.
And I know parenting in generalis hard, but I wanna encourage.
People out there who wannagive up just to hang in
there cuz I'll get towhere we are today later.
(04:41):
Jody, that's a reallydangerous question that
you asked and anytime youask someone am I crazy too?
There . I know thatyou're thinking that.
What am I doing?
What did I get myself into?
Yeah.
And you talked aboutexpectations and Word about
expectations that I thinkleads people to a lot of
(05:05):
disappointment, frustration,all of those things.
We design what we thinkour family is going to
look like, what our familyshould look like, and how
people are going to behave.
We make that all up inour mind, and then when it
doesn't come out that way,that can be really hard.
(05:26):
And so what was your initialresponse to that in the
context of your family?
What did that look?
I think angry and which isreally, hurt is underneath
anger that I let fester asbitterness and hopelessness.
And I think, we're both allabout living abundantly, John
10 10, But the first partis that the thief comes to
(05:47):
steal, kill, and destroy.
But Jesus came togive us abundant life.
But I think I've been stuckin that bitter mode because
of my expectations and hurt.
But thanks be to God.
I'm not there now.
But it, it was very tough times.
And just when our dreams,I think we all have broken
dreams and broken hearts,and that can lead to bitterness.
(06:07):
So, Jody, when you saythat things got difficult,
give us an example.
Tell us a little.
How difficult you mean whenyou say things got difficult?
For when our son turned 19,instead of going to his high
school graduation, he endedup in the county jail, which
was right down the streetfrom the church where my
husband was a pastor at.
(06:28):
And that was very difficult.
He start, started hangingaround the wrong crowd and his
11th year of high school and Idid my best to try to fix him
and keep him out of trouble.
And, Sadly, he ended up inthe New Jersey Department of
Corrections where I had tovisit him through the plexiglass
and his orange outfit.
It was crushing seeing him with.
(06:50):
The shackles on his wristand behind his back, and
I didn't get to hug orhold him for four years.
We didn't get a familypicture for four years,
and it was very crushing.
My hopes and dreams werecrushed by those prison
doors and this sweet littleboy who we met through
our dog when he was five.
It just in my mind,didn't belong there.
(07:11):
But so my heart was broken then.
But God he's donewonderfully today.
I have to wonder, being apastor, family, pastor's,
wife, pastor kids, even though,they're adoptive and all that
stuff, there still can be alot of pressure in the church.
What was the response fromyour church family as well as
(07:34):
the general Christian family?
I'd say it was mixed.
But we did get a lot of support.
And there, there were otherfamilies in the church too
who had birth children whowere in the same prison.
And I think some people, didjudge us, but I think God did
put people who understood that.
In one of our churches,there was another family
(07:55):
who had adopted children andwho had struggled as well.
So I think there was support,although, I still think some
judge us cuz people don't reallyunderstand, that we didn't have
'em from birth and how, justthat there's a different set
of issues we were dealing with.
God gave us Godwings along the way.
At one point I, this wasway back in the beginning.
(08:17):
On Valentine's Day, Igot a package from my
mother-in-law's bible study.
She sends a care package.
Just cards.
And one card said,Stick with it.
In 10 years you'llbe glad you did it.
One person sent $20, go get someice cream for a family together.
And so it just, God gavelittle encouraging things,
even though, things weretough and some people didn't
(08:38):
always support and understand.
But there, there weremany people who did
pray and encourage us.
So that was.
Well, I'm glad that you hadsome people who were encouraging
along the way, and one of thethings I had to learn myself the
hard way when it comes to ourchurch family is that each and
every person is at a differentpoint in their journey, and
(09:03):
their expectations also arethere and are interfering
with their relationships andthings like that sometimes.
And so when someone.
Doesn't respond the way thatyou anticipate that they may.
We have to remember thatthey're on their journey and
they are learning somethingthrough the process, and
(09:24):
we might be a part of that.
I've certainly hadexperiences even with my
kids who were not adopted.
I had them from birth, so Iwas their primary influence
and still, of course, they makechoices that are not the choices
I would've liked for them to.
They're human beings andthey're individual human beings
(09:46):
who have free will and willmake their own journey, and
that's part of their road thatGod will deal with them on.
And as a parent, oftentimes we.
Feel like our success orfailure as a parent is based
on our children's choices.
. And that's just nottrue, especially as
(10:10):
our kids get older.
So I'm glad that God gave yousome of those God wings, but
tell me a little bit more abouthow that journey then progressed
from that point, and how arethings going now in your family?
Sure.
So I remember sitting in churchand I, we had a guest preach
for, my husband didn't preachand our son had just kept
(10:31):
making worse and worse sit.
He kept ha gettingchances in the legal situ.
Legal situationsand kept messing up.
And then he ended in prisonand my heart just kept getting
broken and broken again.
And I remember justsaying, That's it.
I'm gonna give up cuzI can't stand the pain.
And this pastor looked at meduring a sermon and said, Some
of you wanna give up on yourkids and I'm telling you don't.
(10:54):
And like you said, it justnot only just adoptive.
Parenting, but justparents in general, kids
are gonna be frustrating.
And I wanted to give up, butGod just said, Surrender him
to me, but don't give up.
So we supported him and Iactually had to quit my job.
My husband was serving as apastor in South Dakota, so
we, I moved back to New Jerseyfor six months and helped him.
(11:18):
Graduate from intensivesupervised parole program,
whereas if he failed,he would've gone to
prison for four years.
. But through the grace ofGod and lots of prayers and
support, he graduated and movedout to South Dakota with us,
and now fast forward severalyears, he is a wonderful
husband, a wonderful father.
He has a three year old redhead.
(11:40):
We have a three year oldredheaded granddaughter.
And it's just wonderful to see.
He wrote a beautiful thingon my husband's Facebook
wall for Father's Day,just about thanking.
Thank you for adopting me.
Thank you for making meinto the man and father
and husband I am today.
So I just thankGod, but it took.
Took many years toget to that point.
(12:00):
We had to persevere andnot quit and surrender.
But I thank God thathe's doing so well today.
I think there are parentsout there listening to this
today who feel like theyhave not heard those words.
Thank you.
And that can be hard.
It's a hard season of parenthoodwhen you feel like, yes.
(12:23):
You are sacrificing a lotand you are giving a lot,
and you are trying yourbest and maybe not perfect,
but you're really trying.
, think it's important to hearfrom someone like you who
eventually the thank youcomes eventually, it sinks in
and so there's hope and yes.
(12:43):
How do you hold onuntil you get there?
Yeah, well I think we, wegotta hold on to God and look
at what God has done for us.
I had one counselor, tellme I had to relinquish
and surrender them.
So I already mentioned that,just how to continually
surrender your kids Lord.
But also, for me, Ijust wanna fix and.
(13:05):
Just to surrender, but becareful about not being
good dependent because I'vebeen there too, but just
surrendering and supporting.
But another counselorsaid, just that we adopted
these kids like God.
God adopts us as his children.
And I just wanted touchbriefly on What happened
with our daughter when shewas in her early twenties,
(13:26):
and that seems to be a toughtime for kids in general when
I've talked to biologicalparents or adoptive parents.
So we came down tosee our daughter.
And we hadn't seen her andwe wanted to take her to the
movies and go out to dinnerand she did not show up.
So it was rejection again,we were there and we wanted
(13:48):
to do something with her.
And I just remember cryingin church and because
I just felt like ourlove was rejected again.
And it's amazing that throughthat time, God Wink was.
Was leading me through aBible study on Jose and his
redeeming love for his people,and again, encouraged me just
(14:09):
the right time that we needto keep loving Christina.
Like we had to keep loving ourson and not giving up on her.
And it really was a period ofabout five years where we were
very disconnected and did notsee her very much, did not
have a relationship with her.
And again hanging therefor parents who are going
(14:30):
through this, cuz thatwas the early twenties.
Now they're both in the earlythirties and we live an hour
from our daughter Christina.
And our granddaughter,she's an eight year old
and we just spent yesterdayraspberry picking with them.
And we talk severaltimes a week.
So again, that's a very shortoverview of just the difficulty
it's been, but how God hasbrought us through that.
(14:52):
And I think just looking to Godand what he's done for us and.
Staying true andpersevering when with
circumstances that are tough.
They say that love is a twoway street, sometimes it's not.
Sometimes it only goes one way.
Yeah.
And so, or it might be twoway, but it's not going
both ways at the same time.
Yeah.
And you have, and the way,it's not 50 50, it's a
(15:15):
hundred percent in there,or 110% in there when you
choose to love someone.
And it's, it can't beconditional based on them
loving you back and yet.
, tell me, Jody, how do youkeep from being a doormat in
the middle of all of this?
Yes.
Good point.
I think just, I have somegood friends who supported me
(15:35):
and talking with it, but alsojust, we need to, The serenity
of prayer is so important.
We do need to take care ofourselves and have that life
from God pour into us and help.
Plugging into God's strengthand surrounding ourselves
with support and, and justpraying to see, okay, where
am I, need to take care ofmyself along with parenting.
(15:57):
So I think just, just takingcare of yourself and finding fun
things to do and finding peopleto pour into you and plugging
into the power of God andletting God can obviously get
your strength and hope from him.
Well, I like what you saidabout taking care of yourself
and I don't know this cuz youand I haven't talked about
it, but it was all of thispart of where you really got
(16:17):
tuned into the whole healthand wellness area also has,
did this journey impact yourgoals and helping people
really take charge of theirphysical health in the midst?
Difficult circumstances.
Yeah, exactly.
I'm a health coach.
I've been in the health andwellness field over 20 years.
But I do wanna say that inhindsight, I think the stress
(16:40):
of trying to control thekids and trying to control a
situation if I had surrenderedit before and really letting
go of things that I couldn'tThat the stress of the kids
impacted my health negativelySo part of my passion for
health now is to as a healthcoach and being a personal
trainer, I've been the healthand wellness field for 20 years.
(17:01):
But part of it really is themindset and releasing that
stress and focusing on God.
Cuz it, it was very, itis difficult going through
very stressful situationsand not having it affect
your health negatively.
Because it does it.
It's not good for ourhealth and we try to
control things we can't.
?
That's right.
Absolutely.
It's not good for our health.
(17:22):
Well, I can't believe thatour time has just about come
to an end, but I want to giveyou an opportunity to deal a
little bit of hope before we go.
What do you wannaleave us with today?
Well, I wanna leaveyou with Psalm 34 18.
The Lord is close to thebrokenhearted and saves
those who question spirit.
Several years ago, our daughterwrote on her Facebook wall.
(17:45):
Thank you mom and dad for beingthe best parents I could ask for
and for teaching me how to fly.
. And so that goes backto the beginning.
Sorry, I still gettears in my eyes.
Just that when God's calledyou, if you're in a time of
suffering where you need topersevere or just, in, in a
circumstance that you feelover your head, just surrender.
Never quit.
(18:06):
And let God healyour broken heart.
And remember, Hebrew six 19,we have this hope as an anchor
for the soul firm, insecure.
I do wanna say just I'mlooking forward to reading
your book, Radical Abundanceand all the stories of hope
and healing, cuz God, weneed to cling to his hope in
tough times and know that wecan live abundantly despite
(18:26):
the storms and challenges.
He has an abundance of a radicalabundance of hope for us.
And Jody, I do wish youa radically abundant day.
I hope you find that today, andyou have certainly brought some
radical hope into our lives.
Thank you.
Amen.
Thank you.
You too, Theresa.
Thank you.
(18:47):
You know that book thatJodi was just talking about?
Well, it's available right now.
Just head over tothere, janssen.com and
check out the bookshop.
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