Conflict Decoded Podcast
On Conflict Decoded, we explore why it’s so common for those of us dedicated to social change to get mired in conflict within our teams and organizations and how to break free. Join host Katherine Golub (callingsandcourage.com) and guests as we explore the hidden, painful dynamics that undermine our good work and discover proven practices that can help you show up more effectively and experience more ease and joy in your work. Let’s move beyond frustration and disappointment and get on with our important work!
Episodes
February 24, 2026 • 24 mins
Resonance is what happens when Person A brings their caring, curious attention to Person B in an attempt to truly understand them, and Person B responds with—Yes, that's it! You get me!
In this week’s episode, I explore how resonance changes the brain and contributes to better communication and decision-making, and how to listen to people so they really feel heard.
If you’re longing for a deeper connection with yourself and the pe...
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February 18, 2026 • 16 mins
If you develop side-eyed skepticism when you hear people talking about listening to their bodies, you’re not alone.
Research shows that most people don’t believe that knowing what we feel makes any difference at all.
In today’s podcast episode—Why It's Important to Name Emotions, Even If You Don't Believe it—I’ll present to you four arguments for why noticing and naming what we feel in our bodies does indeed matter very much.
I h...
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February 11, 2026 • 14 mins
I invite you to recall an interaction you’ve had—either recently or farther in the past—where you came out wishing things had gone differently.
Now, imagine what you might have done before you entered the interaction that could have helped it get off to a better start and end in a better place.
This week, I’ll explore 10 factors that I’ve wished I’d considered before heading into difficult interactions in the past and that I consi...
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February 3, 2026 • 24 mins
Over the past thirteen years of coaching my clients, I’ve discovered one simple practice that consistently helps my clients lovingly move less-than-helpful parts take a backseat, reclaim the wheel of their lives, and engage challenging interpersonal dynamics effectively.
I return to this practice whenever I need to prepare for a challenging conversation. I call it the Discernment Pause.
In today’s podcast, I’ll walk you through the...
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January 28, 2026 • 13 mins
When clients first come to me, they often say they want to break a bad habit or develop the discipline to stop reacting in certain ways.
But discipline means punishment for the sake of correction, and trying to force, control, and self-dominate ourselves into change rarely works.
When we understand where our habitual reactions arise from and develop awareness of what’s happening in our bodies, it can be easier to take a far more e...
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January 20, 2026 • 60 mins
Friendship. It’s one of the most important ingredients of a well-lived life. And yet, real friendship in which we can show up as and share care for our full, authentic selves, can be so hard to find—and so hard to maintain—in these times. Especially interracially, especially between white women and black women.
That’s why I was so excited that my guests this week, Tanisha Arena and JAC Patrissi agreed to get real with me and share ...
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December 5, 2025 • 62 mins
When we look at the state of waning democracy and rising authoritarianism in the US, it can be so hard to know what to do. Because our power to impact national policy is so limited, for many of us, it can feel like our hands are tied.
Yes, we can attend rallies, boycott companies that support authoritarianism, and vote in local elections. But these actions can feel small compared to the federal government's incessant violence.
So, ...
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November 19, 2025 • 59 mins
If you ever feel overwhelmed by everything you read online, torn between wanting to keep up with what’s happening and wanting to protect your peace, or struggling in your relationship with online information in another way, my conversation with Danielle Reiff is for you.
Danielle and I talk about:
How to interact with online information in ways that diffuse rather than inflame conflict.
How we can stay informed in these times ...
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October 30, 2025 • 42 mins
If we are to have any chance of bringing forth a world in which all people have the power necessary to meet their needs, we must develop the governance structures necessary to wield our power effectively.
In this episode, I speak with Ted Rau, co-founder of Sociocracy for All, about ways to govern our groups and organizations that empower people to work together well. We talk about:
Why majority rules systems inevitably lead to ...
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October 14, 2025 • 10 mins
In this weeks episode of Conflict Decoded, I share:
One reason we often get stuck focusing on what doesn’t work,
How focusing on what’s good increases effectiveness,
Step-by-step instructions for facilitating Appreciative Interviews, and
2 quick questions to start team meetings with immediate connection.
If you long for your team to experience greater cohesion, joy, and resilience in these times, then 'Appreciative Interv...
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September 30, 2025 • 50 mins
Do you have family or friends in the religious right or with vastly different political views than you?
Knowing how to disagree with people you love is crucial in these situations.
If so, this one is for you.
About Sara:
For the first four decades of her life, Sara was a devout Mormon. Then, a series of realizations called her to change course. Since then, Sara has helped thousands of high-achieving women as a master certified life...
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September 17, 2025 • 49 mins
Research shows that the highest-performing teams give each other about five positive comments for every one negative comment. And yet, when things are uncertain, the stakes are high, and we feel frustrated by others' actions, it can be challenging to focus on what’s good.
This week, Lana Jelenjev and I discuss how to restore this balance. We explore:
Why focusing on appreciation is so challenging,
How to build a habit of celeb...
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September 2, 2025 • 60 mins
We often blame ourselves for the tensions of modernity.
But we can become much more effective—and feel better—when we focus on the root causes of our problems.
In this week’s episode of Conflict Decoded, I talk with @Donnie Maclurcan, Co-Founder and Director of Strategy at the Post-Growth Institute. We explore:
The difference between capitalist and post-capitalist economies (which will likely surprise many listeners)
How capit...
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If we are to reclaim collective power, redistribute it equitably, and cultivate the multiracial multicultural democracies we long for. We must develop the ability to read power in our institutions and our lives.
We must become power literate.
In this week’s episode of Conflict Decoded, I talk with the brilliant Karla Monterroso about what power actually is. How the internet and demographic shift are changing it, our relationship to...
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August 5, 2025 • 57 mins
We are currently in a collective battle of the imagination.
While the power of the 99% may be limited. We grow our power when we reclaim our ability to imagine from dominant narratives.
As Desiree Adaway shares in this episode, imagining the world we long for is one of the most powerful and radical acts there is. Even if we do not live to see the fruits of our imagination, the billionaire class does not get to tell us what is possi...
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July 21, 2025 • 60 mins
The daughter of Vanessa Andreotti (author of Hospicing Modernity: Facing Humanity’s Wrongs and The Implications for Social Activism).
Giovanna de Oliveira Andreotti grew up facing the ongoing predicament of collapse.
In this episode, Giovanna shares how facing the reality of collapse no longer destabilizes her. Instead, the wisdom she’s gleaned—and her commitment to inquiry—are helping her to acknowledge reality. Notice the ways it...
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July 8, 2025 • 39 mins
Heather Plett—facilitator, trainer, and author known globally for her work in holding space—and Katherine explore how activists often get sucked into the victim - rescuer - perpetrator vortex. They also discuss how to break free from it.
This model supported Katherine, Heather, and many others to shift from white saviorism to a posture of more true solidarity.
Bio:
Heather Plett, is the author of the award-winning book The Art of H...
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June 25, 2025 • 42 mins
Shiree Teng—community organizer, storyteller, and healer. She believes that love and courage will lead the way towards our collective liberation.
Shiree speaks with Katherine about how to center radical love in our work for change.
With a mixture of grace and conviction, Shiree offers guidance for how to align your life with your truth and a fierce love for yourself and others.
Without cultivating love for ourselves and each other...
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June 10, 2025 • 63 mins
If we are to survive the current and looming environmental and economic emergencies and grow communities in which we thrive, we need to be able to relate and work together across difference.
In this episode, Carmen Spagnola teaches the building blocks for cultivating secure attachment—the ability to help ourselves and others feel safe, seen, secure, and soothed—even with people we’re most challenged by.
About Carmen Spagnola:
Carme...
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May 26, 2025 • 38 mins
We have good reason to feel scared about what’s happening nationally and globally.
And yet, as Sulma Arias, Executive Director of Peoples’ Action, reminds us in this week’s podcast, there are so many incredible opportunities for change in our own local communities.
Whether it’s removing lead from the school playground or installing a stop sign where the kids are playing, we often have the most power to create change at home. And wh...
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