May 16, 2023 • 28 mins
Happy Birthday Radically, Rachael! 🧁
Rachael celebrates her 33rd birthday, her "Jesus" year, with the debut of her podcast.
The 33rd year, is considered by some to be a special year: a re-birth or reinvention of sorts. Some call it an ego death...others call it a mid-life crisis. No matter how you look at it - it will be a RADICAL one, no doubt.
Rachael recounts. a recent experience working with Nereyda, a Spiritual Sound Practitioner. Nereyda explores the rings of Rachael's BioField and provides her some energetic attunement. Through this experience, we learn about Rachael's life from birth to 33.
Want more Radically, Rachael? Follow Rachael on Instagram and TikTok @RadicallyRachael
Interested in Tarot, Coaching or Reiki? Visit https://radicallyrachael.com/
Intro Music: Stream "SPIRIT" by Radically, Rachael.
https://open.spotify.com/track/0dciHn2Q55sDynrEAtNMVu?si=43056a15b4b44d46
Intro Music Created and Provided with Permission by BigWonder. Check out Big Wonder on Spotify and Apple Music.
https://open.spotify.com/artist/6Crz51fnR5565ugam8M3qG?si=-Vc5O965RLOUJoR_SVFJLA
Closing Music: "Radically Rachael" Provided with Permission by Fine Young Gamers. https://open.spotify.com/track/49SYLTC7cDvdxiP0iqezvI?si=eeb1ca006eb64df6
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
One day I woke up and realized that I wasn't happy.
(00:08):
But the best part about writing your own story is that you can change it whenever you want.
You are the main character and the author.
This is my life story, the spiritual awakening and sexual evolution of a wild woman.
(00:31):
May these stories help you to see and understand your own story better, awakening you to the
magic and synchronicity within your own life.
I know they will make you laugh, cry and cringe.
But they will also be a light in the darkness and a mirror to teach you more deeply about
(00:53):
who you are called to be.
I am Radically Rachael
(01:22):
Hello Kings and Queens and everything in between.
Suns, moons and stars, listeners near and listeners far.
Welcome to the Radically Rachael podcast.
I am your host, Rachael Wilde.
This is episode 2.
This podcast has been a long time in the making.
(01:45):
And by a long time in the making, I mean I've been talking about making this podcast for
a while.
Over the last three years, I can't recall the times, the amount of times and the amount
of people that I've told, I'm making a podcast.
Yeah, I'm working on a podcast.
I want to tell my story.
In fact, I even left my teaching career to do this.
(02:09):
I mean that's not the total entire reason why I left teaching, but I knew that I couldn't
be a public school teacher and also tell my true story.
All the things I know I want to share.
If you've been following me on social media for any part of time, or if you know me in
the real world, you know I've had a crazy life experience.
(02:34):
In fact, before I knew I was going to write a podcast or tell my story, I had a lot of
people tapping me on the shoulder telling me, Rachael, you've got to tell this story.
Rachael, you've got so many stories to share.
Rachael, you need to write a book.
It's funny how the universe guides us and gives other people the words and inspiration
(02:56):
and encouragement that we need sometimes.
I'm very thankful for anyone that's ever encouraged me along in this journey and believes
in me and believes that I have something to say and something worthy of listening to.
I'm launching this podcast on my birthday as I turn 33.
(03:17):
33 turns around the sun.
My Jesus year.
I've been seeing on TikTok that the 33rd year of your life is where you are reborn
in some sense.
Maybe it's a midlife crisis or an ego death.
Perhaps it's the year where you abandon old ways and start new.
(03:39):
I can't think of a better day, a better time to kick off this podcast than on my 33rd birthday,
my Jesus year.
The first few episodes of the podcast will really set the scene, set the stage, if you
will, of my life and to help get everybody caught up and on the same page, no matter
(04:00):
where you're jumping in from.
For today's episode, I'm going to tell you a story that will help you learn a little
bit more about my timeline, where I began, where I've been to where I am now.
Today's story is an inside look into a biofield tuning session that I had with a spiritual
(04:20):
practitioner.
She moves through my aura, my biofield and reveals things about me and about my past.
Let's dive in.
Just a few weeks ago, I got a text message from my friend, Ren.
(04:43):
Ren and I grew up going to church together.
Her mom was the children's choir director and my parents were our Sunday school teachers.
Ren texted me and she said, are you interested in a biofield tuning session?
And without much context, I said, yes, because I'm an energy worker.
I'm a Reiki practitioner.
(05:05):
This woman that Ren connected me with is actually another woman we know from our church congregation
when we were young women.
She's the mother of a friend of ours, Nareda.
Nareda is from the Dominican Republic originally, and she was a medical doctor there.
When she emigrated here to the United States, she wasn't able to maintain the same certifications
(05:30):
and licensure, so she pursued other degrees and she became a music teacher and she taught
cello and other string instruments.
She's a very gifted, smart woman, and I knew that she was a gifted instrumentalist when
she would play in front of our church when I was a little girl.
(05:52):
I hadn't seen Nareda in probably 15 years or so.
She lives across the street from my childhood elementary school.
I arrived one evening dressed for comfort, not quite knowing what was on the other side
of the front door.
When I arrived at Nareda's house, she welcomed me in and we sat and we caught up a little
(06:16):
bit.
I shared with her that I also am an energy worker, and so I am fully open and I believe
wholeheartedly in whatever we were about to embark on.
She talked a little bit about the human biofield, what I know as our aura, but it is the energetic
field that exists and extends outside of our physical body.
(06:41):
The older you are, the bigger your field will be, the farther out it will be from you.
So if you think about sitting side by side on the couch with somebody, you both are sitting
in and bathing in somebody's biofield.
If you and your family are going in a car somewhere, you all are sitting within each
(07:01):
other's biofields.
That's either a pleasant experience sometimes or it might not be.
And that also explains how sometimes we can really influence and impact each other's
moods.
It's a vibrational thing happening outside of us.
Something clicked inside of me when I was an elementary school teacher.
(07:24):
I was teaching third grade and I was teaching students about what is happening when we rub
a balloon on our heads and we are creating static electricity.
I really began to understand energy, vibes, and vibrations on a different level.
A balloon resting by itself has both positive charges and negative charges, protons and
(07:50):
electrons.
And so do we, humans.
When you rub a balloon on your head, on your hair, you're creating some friction and that's
going to cause some of these protons and electrons to move.
You'll have an excess positive charge build up on your hair, on your head, and there will
(08:12):
be an excess negative charge built up on the balloon.
And these opposite charges attract and that is why the balloon will stick to your head
if you let go of it.
Over time, the protons and neutrons will jump from the balloon back to your head or from
the head to your balloon and they'll become more balanced and then that balloon will fall.
(08:35):
It will no longer remain more negatively charged and your hair will eventually stop being staticky
and it will no longer be positively charged.
We can't see the protons and electrons jumping around and we can't see them around our bodies,
but they're there.
And so every time we touch someone, hug someone, walk past someone, our protons and electrons
(09:01):
are moving and seeking balance.
Opposite charges are attracting.
It made sense when I thought about the way that you can walk into a room after negative
words have been exchanged.
You can feel the charge in the air is different or if there's been a conflict.
We can't see the vibrations and we can't see the vibes, but they're there.
(09:26):
We can't see the sound waves.
We can't see the light waves, but they're there.
We can see the evidence of them.
I can see the light visibly in the air, right?
Radiant energy, light energy.
I can feel temperature change.
I can feel thermal energy.
So the way that I come to understand spirituality in a deeper way really comes from my foundations
(09:52):
as a scientist first.
And the more I learn about science, the more I learn about spirit.
For me, I can't have spirituality without having the science and I can't have science
without believing in the spirituality of it.
That this universe, this galaxy is so huge.
(10:12):
It's so expansive.
And here we are in our tiny corner of it.
The primary tools used in a biofield tuning session are tuning forks.
Tuning forks that then are aligned with the musical scale or the energy frequencies related
(10:36):
to chakras.
She had me get comfortable on a massage table and then she placed different crystals on
or around my body or perhaps in my hands.
When I first laid down on Narada's table, she said, oh, you look just like your mom.
And I smiled knowingly as I get that a lot.
(10:58):
She of course knew my mom from my childhood church where we all attended.
And then she moved around me and would strike different tuning forks, working within the
sounds that we are hearing resounding in the room and working within her own connection
to spirit and her own intuition.
What was interesting is if she struck the tuning fork and we did not hear the note resound
(11:23):
out loud in the room for very long, that meant my body was really lacking that frequency
or that vibration, that note.
And so my body would be absorbing it.
And once your body is replenished or balanced, coherent in alignment, when you strike that
tuning fork, you will begin to hear the sound vibrate more loudly and fully in the room.
(11:51):
And that is how you know you can move on to a different part of your body or work with
a different note, a different fork entirely.
Fascinating stuff.
This is fascinating.
So for our first session, she wanted to work within the rings of my biofield and kind of
(12:11):
go back in my energetic timeline so that she could get familiar with my energy a bit and
do some tuning.
She picked up a fork and she stood next to my body and she told me she knew she needed
to work within my throat chakra.
And I said, that makes sense.
(12:31):
I'm working on putting a podcast together and I've been feeling very blocked in my throat
lately and I just haven't known how to start.
So she stood next to my throat space and moved maybe 20 to 25 feet away from me.
And she began to strike that fork.
And she would strike the fork and let the sound resound out in the room.
(12:54):
And she would slowly start to walk closer to me.
In doing so, when you hear a change in the sound, she could tell that is where my biofield
began, where my energy, how far out my energy went away from me.
So as I move through my biofield with you as the listener, we're going to be visualizing
(13:16):
these almost like tree rings extending away from our bodies.
So my oldest energy is farthest away from me and my most present energy is very close
to me.
So at this time, Nereida is 25 feet away from me and she discovers where my biofield begins.
(13:40):
She's closing her eyes and she's tuning in and she's listening to what spirit is revealing
to her about my energy and my vibration.
She says, okay, you're maybe one or two.
Here we are.
And you're sad, very sad.
(14:04):
You are a sad, a sad baby.
And I said, yes, I think when my sister was born, which would have been when I was two,
I think I had a very hard time with it.
I didn't really like having a little sister and I think that I was sad and I struggled
at that time.
(14:26):
She continued to step a little closer to me and she continued to emote about my early
years of life.
She said again, still so sad, so sad.
As she's taking steps closer to me, she calls out a few numbers out loud, perhaps, you know,
(14:51):
signaling different ages as she can tell maybe where she's at in my development, in my growth.
She again says, sadness, sadness, and I said, I think when I was little, I didn't feel wanted
by my parents.
I think that my mom and I had a lot of conflict when I was little and that some part of me
(15:16):
just didn't feel wanted and didn't feel loved by her or by my parents.
And she turned to me and said, oh, but you were wanted.
You were loved.
You do know that, right?
You were wanted here because here you are.
And I just nodded politely.
(15:38):
So at this time, she found my birth and it was a sad period of time.
And then she said, five years old, still very sad.
And then she's like, 10 years old, still sad.
I resonated with the understanding that I was deeply sad as a child.
I just know that's not what came out on the exterior.
(16:01):
And I said, I did experience a lot of sadness as a child.
I think for me that really presented itself as anger.
I would have called myself an angry child.
I was very loud and had outbursts and would be very aggressive.
And the narrator replied, how anger is not our normal natural state, nor sadness.
(16:28):
Happiness, joy, love, those are our natural states.
That is the natural state of a child.
So that even though I may have perceived myself as an angry kid, I wasn't.
I was just suffering.
(16:55):
She took another step closer to me and called out the age 12.
And she said, oh, the energy is so different.
Something life changing, your life changed here.
Maybe this is when you began your spiritual journey.
And tears began to roll down my face.
And I said, no, that's when I met my best friend.
(17:21):
We met when we were in sixth grade.
And I was so badly bullied in elementary school and so badly bullied that year, I wanted to
kill myself.
But my best friend, Kelsey, came to me at that age and that grade.
And we saved each other.
(17:43):
We desperately needed each other's friendship and sisterhood.
She stepped closer to me and the next age she said out loud was 15, 16.
She said high school, I had a lot of people in my life that were not real friends, not
true friends.
(18:04):
And I had a lot of people around me that were not good to me, which resonated as well.
And then she said, at 17, something happened.
And she clapped her hands.
She said something happened and then it didn't happen again.
And I looked at her and I knew that this was the moment.
(18:28):
I knew that I was at a choice point.
I could be my authentic self and tell my true story or I could just swallow it and keep
it inside.
I chose to tell the truth.
I looked at Nereida and I told her my mom was abusive, physically, emotionally, verbally.
(18:52):
And I think that that's the energy that you're picking up related to my sadness.
And this moment at 17, that was the last time my mom hit me.
We had an intense fight when I was a junior in high school.
(19:14):
And that is when I decided that I wasn't going to let her hit me anymore and that I was going
to defend myself.
After that time in my bio field, she reported that the energy was improving, that she could
(19:35):
tell that I was happier and doing better, but that there was still this deep underlying
sadness in my frequency and my vibration.
Things did improve for a few years once I moved out of my parents' home and I went away to
college, though it was short lived as I moved back home upon graduating just two years later.
(20:01):
In a year or so, I moved out with my then girlfriend, eventually wife, but I found myself
in the same energetic circumstance as I had been growing up.
I was in a home where I didn't feel safe.
There was lots of anger.
(20:21):
There was lots of conflict.
It was very emotionally turbulent and toxic.
Every time she took a few steps closer to me, we were moving up in age.
She reported higher vibrations and happiness and at this point, Narada was nearly standing
(20:48):
by my side as I laid on the table, so I knew that she was in my most current frequency,
my most current energy experiences.
She suddenly gasped and looked surprised and she looked at me and said, you have an enemy.
I said, I know, and I nodded knowingly.
(21:09):
She then looked even more surprised that I knew who my enemy was.
I told Narada that me and this woman live geographically two minutes from each other.
Our homes, our houses are so close.
And I said, sometimes I start to think certain thoughts or feel certain things and I know
(21:33):
it's not my own energy.
I know it's someone else directing it towards me.
As Narada moved through my field, she would say, I'm just going to tune that up.
I'm just going to tune that out.
And she would choose different tuning forks to use for the different parts of my past
and my journey.
So as she was standing here, she said, I'm just going to tune that too, speaking about
(21:57):
my enemy.
My time with Narada was beautiful and so special because she could see me, she could feel me,
she could hear my energy.
And I felt so peaceful leaving her house that night and I slept like a baby.
(22:21):
It was incredible.
Now all of those things are still things I carry with me.
All of those memories and all of those people and experiences are a part of my vibration
and are a part of my signature.
But I'm not as out of tune as I was.
(22:41):
Those notes now sound better as a part of my orchestration in the symphony.
I'm still going back to her regularly and doing some tuning work because I find it to
be very healing and helpful for me.
The reason why I chose to share this story with you today, because it would help highlight
(23:03):
for you some parts of my journey, some major parts of my life.
In my timeline, I grew up religious, a coming out journey, coming into my queer identity.
I had a traumatic childhood.
I suffered abuse.
(23:24):
That led me to also mirror that in an abusive marriage, a toxic relationship, divorce, the
challenges that I still face in the present as I navigate, rewiring my brain and unlearning
the unhealthy strategies that I used once to survive, but I don't need them anymore.
(23:52):
Go parenting, having a bonus life and a blended family.
These are all parts of my story that you will get to know and understand a little bit deeper,
a little bit better soon enough.
(24:14):
Thanks for joining me for this episode of Radically Rachael.
Today's affirmation is, I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
(24:40):
No matter your story, no matter where you've been, it's important to love yourself.
You are your own best friend and you're not going anywhere.
You're stuck with you, baby.
Accept yourself as you are, works and all.
We all have strengths.
We all have weaknesses.
We all have light and dark, sun and moon.
(25:03):
It's what makes us a whole being, having both parts, the shadow and the light.
And forgive yourself.
Nobody's perfect.
We all make mistakes.
But every day is a new chance.
Every day we get to make new choices.
New choices can change your life.
(25:26):
I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
Thanks for joining me.
Radically Rachael.
All music has been provided with permission.
Intro music by Big Wonder Music.
Check out Big Wonder on Spotify and iTunes.
(25:48):
Closing credits performed by Fine Young Gamers.
I wanna be brave.
I wanna be myself.
I don't wanna wake up every day as someone else.
I wanna be strong.
I wanna be soft.
(26:09):
I want every single thing that I've been dreaming of.
But that takes courage
And that takes time
And a single moment to decide to change your mind
If you don't like the road you're on
Just turn around
You too can start living a radically different life
(26:33):
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Free in all the ways it matters
Nothing left to prove
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Lose yourself to find yourself
To find out what's true
Before anything was something
(26:54):
It first had to be a dream
And dreamers have to dream the worlds that no one else can see
Two eyes closed and one heart open
Straight for destiny
Following the path you chose, before you chose to be
You wanna be radical, don't you?
(27:17):
Free in all the ways it matters
Nothing left to prove
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Lose yourself to find yourself
To find out what's true
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Free in all the ways it matters
(27:39):
Nothing left to prove
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Lose yourself to find yourself
To find out what's true
One day I woke up and realized that I wasn't happy.
(00:08):
But the best part about writing your own story is that you can change it whenever you want.
You are the main character and the author.
This is my life story, the spiritual awakening and sexual evolution of a wild woman.
(00:31):
May these stories help you to see and understand your own story better, awakening you to the
magic and synchronicity within your own life.
I know they will make you laugh, cry and cringe.
But they will also be a light in the darkness and a mirror to teach you more deeply about
(00:53):
who you are called to be.
I am Radically Rachael
(01:22):
Hello Kings and Queens and everything in between.
Suns, moons and stars, listeners near and listeners far.
Welcome to the Radically Rachael podcast.
I am your host, Rachael Wilde.
This is episode 2.
This podcast has been a long time in the making.
(01:45):
And by a long time in the making, I mean I've been talking about making this podcast for
a while.
Over the last three years, I can't recall the times, the amount of times and the amount
of people that I've told, I'm making a podcast.
Yeah, I'm working on a podcast.
I want to tell my story.
In fact, I even left my teaching career to do this.
(02:09):
I mean that's not the total entire reason why I left teaching, but I knew that I couldn't
be a public school teacher and also tell my true story.
All the things I know I want to share.
If you've been following me on social media for any part of time, or if you know me in
the real world, you know I've had a crazy life experience.
(02:34):
In fact, before I knew I was going to write a podcast or tell my story, I had a lot of
people tapping me on the shoulder telling me, Rachael, you've got to tell this story.
Rachael, you've got so many stories to share.
Rachael, you need to write a book.
It's funny how the universe guides us and gives other people the words and inspiration
(02:56):
and encouragement that we need sometimes.
I'm very thankful for anyone that's ever encouraged me along in this journey and believes
in me and believes that I have something to say and something worthy of listening to.
I'm launching this podcast on my birthday as I turn 33.
(03:17):
33 turns around the sun.
My Jesus year.
I've been seeing on TikTok that the 33rd year of your life is where you are reborn
in some sense.
Maybe it's a midlife crisis or an ego death.
Perhaps it's the year where you abandon old ways and start new.
(03:39):
I can't think of a better day, a better time to kick off this podcast than on my 33rd birthday,
my Jesus year.
The first few episodes of the podcast will really set the scene, set the stage, if you
will, of my life and to help get everybody caught up and on the same page, no matter
(04:00):
where you're jumping in from.
For today's episode, I'm going to tell you a story that will help you learn a little
bit more about my timeline, where I began, where I've been to where I am now.
Today's story is an inside look into a biofield tuning session that I had with a spiritual
(04:20):
practitioner.
She moves through my aura, my biofield and reveals things about me and about my past.
Let's dive in.
Just a few weeks ago, I got a text message from my friend, Ren.
(04:43):
Ren and I grew up going to church together.
Her mom was the children's choir director and my parents were our Sunday school teachers.
Ren texted me and she said, are you interested in a biofield tuning session?
And without much context, I said, yes, because I'm an energy worker.
I'm a Reiki practitioner.
(05:05):
This woman that Ren connected me with is actually another woman we know from our church congregation
when we were young women.
She's the mother of a friend of ours, Nareda.
Nareda is from the Dominican Republic originally, and she was a medical doctor there.
When she emigrated here to the United States, she wasn't able to maintain the same certifications
(05:30):
and licensure, so she pursued other degrees and she became a music teacher and she taught
cello and other string instruments.
She's a very gifted, smart woman, and I knew that she was a gifted instrumentalist when
she would play in front of our church when I was a little girl.
(05:52):
I hadn't seen Nareda in probably 15 years or so.
She lives across the street from my childhood elementary school.
I arrived one evening dressed for comfort, not quite knowing what was on the other side
of the front door.
When I arrived at Nareda's house, she welcomed me in and we sat and we caught up a little
(06:16):
bit.
I shared with her that I also am an energy worker, and so I am fully open and I believe
wholeheartedly in whatever we were about to embark on.
She talked a little bit about the human biofield, what I know as our aura, but it is the energetic
field that exists and extends outside of our physical body.
(06:41):
The older you are, the bigger your field will be, the farther out it will be from you.
So if you think about sitting side by side on the couch with somebody, you both are sitting
in and bathing in somebody's biofield.
If you and your family are going in a car somewhere, you all are sitting within each
(07:01):
other's biofields.
That's either a pleasant experience sometimes or it might not be.
And that also explains how sometimes we can really influence and impact each other's
moods.
It's a vibrational thing happening outside of us.
Something clicked inside of me when I was an elementary school teacher.
(07:24):
I was teaching third grade and I was teaching students about what is happening when we rub
a balloon on our heads and we are creating static electricity.
I really began to understand energy, vibes, and vibrations on a different level.
A balloon resting by itself has both positive charges and negative charges, protons and
(07:50):
electrons.
And so do we, humans.
When you rub a balloon on your head, on your hair, you're creating some friction and that's
going to cause some of these protons and electrons to move.
You'll have an excess positive charge build up on your hair, on your head, and there will
(08:12):
be an excess negative charge built up on the balloon.
And these opposite charges attract and that is why the balloon will stick to your head
if you let go of it.
Over time, the protons and neutrons will jump from the balloon back to your head or from
the head to your balloon and they'll become more balanced and then that balloon will fall.
(08:35):
It will no longer remain more negatively charged and your hair will eventually stop being staticky
and it will no longer be positively charged.
We can't see the protons and electrons jumping around and we can't see them around our bodies,
but they're there.
And so every time we touch someone, hug someone, walk past someone, our protons and electrons
(09:01):
are moving and seeking balance.
Opposite charges are attracting.
It made sense when I thought about the way that you can walk into a room after negative
words have been exchanged.
You can feel the charge in the air is different or if there's been a conflict.
We can't see the vibrations and we can't see the vibes, but they're there.
(09:26):
We can't see the sound waves.
We can't see the light waves, but they're there.
We can see the evidence of them.
I can see the light visibly in the air, right?
Radiant energy, light energy.
I can feel temperature change.
I can feel thermal energy.
So the way that I come to understand spirituality in a deeper way really comes from my foundations
(09:52):
as a scientist first.
And the more I learn about science, the more I learn about spirit.
For me, I can't have spirituality without having the science and I can't have science
without believing in the spirituality of it.
That this universe, this galaxy is so huge.
(10:12):
It's so expansive.
And here we are in our tiny corner of it.
The primary tools used in a biofield tuning session are tuning forks.
Tuning forks that then are aligned with the musical scale or the energy frequencies related
(10:36):
to chakras.
She had me get comfortable on a massage table and then she placed different crystals on
or around my body or perhaps in my hands.
When I first laid down on Narada's table, she said, oh, you look just like your mom.
And I smiled knowingly as I get that a lot.
(10:58):
She of course knew my mom from my childhood church where we all attended.
And then she moved around me and would strike different tuning forks, working within the
sounds that we are hearing resounding in the room and working within her own connection
to spirit and her own intuition.
What was interesting is if she struck the tuning fork and we did not hear the note resound
(11:23):
out loud in the room for very long, that meant my body was really lacking that frequency
or that vibration, that note.
And so my body would be absorbing it.
And once your body is replenished or balanced, coherent in alignment, when you strike that
tuning fork, you will begin to hear the sound vibrate more loudly and fully in the room.
(11:51):
And that is how you know you can move on to a different part of your body or work with
a different note, a different fork entirely.
Fascinating stuff.
This is fascinating.
So for our first session, she wanted to work within the rings of my biofield and kind of
(12:11):
go back in my energetic timeline so that she could get familiar with my energy a bit and
do some tuning.
She picked up a fork and she stood next to my body and she told me she knew she needed
to work within my throat chakra.
And I said, that makes sense.
(12:31):
I'm working on putting a podcast together and I've been feeling very blocked in my throat
lately and I just haven't known how to start.
So she stood next to my throat space and moved maybe 20 to 25 feet away from me.
And she began to strike that fork.
And she would strike the fork and let the sound resound out in the room.
(12:54):
And she would slowly start to walk closer to me.
In doing so, when you hear a change in the sound, she could tell that is where my biofield
began, where my energy, how far out my energy went away from me.
So as I move through my biofield with you as the listener, we're going to be visualizing
(13:16):
these almost like tree rings extending away from our bodies.
So my oldest energy is farthest away from me and my most present energy is very close
to me.
So at this time, Nereida is 25 feet away from me and she discovers where my biofield begins.
(13:40):
She's closing her eyes and she's tuning in and she's listening to what spirit is revealing
to her about my energy and my vibration.
She says, okay, you're maybe one or two.
Here we are.
And you're sad, very sad.
(14:04):
You are a sad, a sad baby.
And I said, yes, I think when my sister was born, which would have been when I was two,
I think I had a very hard time with it.
I didn't really like having a little sister and I think that I was sad and I struggled
at that time.
(14:26):
She continued to step a little closer to me and she continued to emote about my early
years of life.
She said again, still so sad, so sad.
As she's taking steps closer to me, she calls out a few numbers out loud, perhaps, you know,
(14:51):
signaling different ages as she can tell maybe where she's at in my development, in my growth.
She again says, sadness, sadness, and I said, I think when I was little, I didn't feel wanted
by my parents.
I think that my mom and I had a lot of conflict when I was little and that some part of me
(15:16):
just didn't feel wanted and didn't feel loved by her or by my parents.
And she turned to me and said, oh, but you were wanted.
You were loved.
You do know that, right?
You were wanted here because here you are.
And I just nodded politely.
(15:38):
So at this time, she found my birth and it was a sad period of time.
And then she said, five years old, still very sad.
And then she's like, 10 years old, still sad.
I resonated with the understanding that I was deeply sad as a child.
I just know that's not what came out on the exterior.
(16:01):
And I said, I did experience a lot of sadness as a child.
I think for me that really presented itself as anger.
I would have called myself an angry child.
I was very loud and had outbursts and would be very aggressive.
And the narrator replied, how anger is not our normal natural state, nor sadness.
(16:28):
Happiness, joy, love, those are our natural states.
That is the natural state of a child.
So that even though I may have perceived myself as an angry kid, I wasn't.
I was just suffering.
(16:55):
She took another step closer to me and called out the age 12.
And she said, oh, the energy is so different.
Something life changing, your life changed here.
Maybe this is when you began your spiritual journey.
And tears began to roll down my face.
And I said, no, that's when I met my best friend.
(17:21):
We met when we were in sixth grade.
And I was so badly bullied in elementary school and so badly bullied that year, I wanted to
kill myself.
But my best friend, Kelsey, came to me at that age and that grade.
And we saved each other.
(17:43):
We desperately needed each other's friendship and sisterhood.
She stepped closer to me and the next age she said out loud was 15, 16.
She said high school, I had a lot of people in my life that were not real friends, not
true friends.
(18:04):
And I had a lot of people around me that were not good to me, which resonated as well.
And then she said, at 17, something happened.
And she clapped her hands.
She said something happened and then it didn't happen again.
And I looked at her and I knew that this was the moment.
(18:28):
I knew that I was at a choice point.
I could be my authentic self and tell my true story or I could just swallow it and keep
it inside.
I chose to tell the truth.
I looked at Nereida and I told her my mom was abusive, physically, emotionally, verbally.
(18:52):
And I think that that's the energy that you're picking up related to my sadness.
And this moment at 17, that was the last time my mom hit me.
We had an intense fight when I was a junior in high school.
(19:14):
And that is when I decided that I wasn't going to let her hit me anymore and that I was going
to defend myself.
After that time in my bio field, she reported that the energy was improving, that she could
(19:35):
tell that I was happier and doing better, but that there was still this deep underlying
sadness in my frequency and my vibration.
Things did improve for a few years once I moved out of my parents' home and I went away to
college, though it was short lived as I moved back home upon graduating just two years later.
(20:01):
In a year or so, I moved out with my then girlfriend, eventually wife, but I found myself
in the same energetic circumstance as I had been growing up.
I was in a home where I didn't feel safe.
There was lots of anger.
(20:21):
There was lots of conflict.
It was very emotionally turbulent and toxic.
Every time she took a few steps closer to me, we were moving up in age.
She reported higher vibrations and happiness and at this point, Narada was nearly standing
(20:48):
by my side as I laid on the table, so I knew that she was in my most current frequency,
my most current energy experiences.
She suddenly gasped and looked surprised and she looked at me and said, you have an enemy.
I said, I know, and I nodded knowingly.
(21:09):
She then looked even more surprised that I knew who my enemy was.
I told Narada that me and this woman live geographically two minutes from each other.
Our homes, our houses are so close.
And I said, sometimes I start to think certain thoughts or feel certain things and I know
(21:33):
it's not my own energy.
I know it's someone else directing it towards me.
As Narada moved through my field, she would say, I'm just going to tune that up.
I'm just going to tune that out.
And she would choose different tuning forks to use for the different parts of my past
and my journey.
So as she was standing here, she said, I'm just going to tune that too, speaking about
(21:57):
my enemy.
My time with Narada was beautiful and so special because she could see me, she could feel me,
she could hear my energy.
And I felt so peaceful leaving her house that night and I slept like a baby.
(22:21):
It was incredible.
Now all of those things are still things I carry with me.
All of those memories and all of those people and experiences are a part of my vibration
and are a part of my signature.
But I'm not as out of tune as I was.
(22:41):
Those notes now sound better as a part of my orchestration in the symphony.
I'm still going back to her regularly and doing some tuning work because I find it to
be very healing and helpful for me.
The reason why I chose to share this story with you today, because it would help highlight
(23:03):
for you some parts of my journey, some major parts of my life.
In my timeline, I grew up religious, a coming out journey, coming into my queer identity.
I had a traumatic childhood.
I suffered abuse.
(23:24):
That led me to also mirror that in an abusive marriage, a toxic relationship, divorce, the
challenges that I still face in the present as I navigate, rewiring my brain and unlearning
the unhealthy strategies that I used once to survive, but I don't need them anymore.
(23:52):
Go parenting, having a bonus life and a blended family.
These are all parts of my story that you will get to know and understand a little bit deeper,
a little bit better soon enough.
(24:14):
Thanks for joining me for this episode of Radically Rachael.
Today's affirmation is, I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
(24:40):
No matter your story, no matter where you've been, it's important to love yourself.
You are your own best friend and you're not going anywhere.
You're stuck with you, baby.
Accept yourself as you are, works and all.
We all have strengths.
We all have weaknesses.
We all have light and dark, sun and moon.
(25:03):
It's what makes us a whole being, having both parts, the shadow and the light.
And forgive yourself.
Nobody's perfect.
We all make mistakes.
But every day is a new chance.
Every day we get to make new choices.
New choices can change your life.
(25:26):
I radically love, accept and forgive myself.
Thanks for joining me.
Radically Rachael.
All music has been provided with permission.
Intro music by Big Wonder Music.
Check out Big Wonder on Spotify and iTunes.
(25:48):
Closing credits performed by Fine Young Gamers.
I wanna be brave.
I wanna be myself.
I don't wanna wake up every day as someone else.
I wanna be strong.
I wanna be soft.
(26:09):
I want every single thing that I've been dreaming of.
But that takes courage
And that takes time
And a single moment to decide to change your mind
If you don't like the road you're on
Just turn around
You too can start living a radically different life
(26:33):
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Free in all the ways it matters
Nothing left to prove
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Lose yourself to find yourself
To find out what's true
Before anything was something
(26:54):
It first had to be a dream
And dreamers have to dream the worlds that no one else can see
Two eyes closed and one heart open
Straight for destiny
Following the path you chose, before you chose to be
You wanna be radical, don't you?
(27:17):
Free in all the ways it matters
Nothing left to prove
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Lose yourself to find yourself
To find out what's true
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Free in all the ways it matters
(27:39):
Nothing left to prove
You wanna be radical, don't you?
Lose yourself to find yourself
To find out what's true
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