How to Get Your Athlete to College Debt Free (and Where to Start) with Shellee Howard, College Ready
September 23, 2025 • 40 mins
Stressed thinking about scholarships, applications, and college costs? You’re not alone. Shellee Howard shares simple, practical advice that actually makes this process feel doable.
In this episode, you’ll hear about:
- How to set your athlete up for success academically and financially.
- Practical strategies for aiming for a debt-free education.
- Tips for athletes at every stage, from just starting high school to preparing for college.
- Real-life examples showing how small steps now can pay off big later.
Get ready to feel more confident and less stressed about the whole college journey!
Come hang out with Shellee:
- Instagram: @collegereadyplan
- Learn more & work with her: https://collegereadyplan.com/
- Guest interview inquiries: shellee@collegereadyplan.com
Episode Highlights:
[00:01:04] About Shellee Howard and College Ready. Shellee has spent nearly two decades helping families navigate the college admission process, and she’s walked the walk – her own four kids all went to college debt free!
[00:08:07] Biggest Mistake: Lacking a Plan. One of the biggest issues families face is putting all their hopes on an athletic scholarship without having backup plans in place for college funding.
[00:10:19] Viewing College as a Business. The availability of athletic scholarships depends a lot on whether the sport brings in money for the university, so it’s smart to think about academics and other scholarship options too.
[00:14:33] Finding the Right Academic and Athletic Fit. It’s not just about grades and scores—showing passion, leadership, and finding the right fit academically and socially can really open scholarship doors.
[00:18:56] Helping Athletes Determine College Fit. Rather than picking a school because it’s sunny or close to the beach, it’s important for students to start exploring their interests and values early to find a good college fit.
[00:23:59] College Prep Timeline: Start in Middle School. Starting as early as 7th or 8th grade gives students time to build their resume through community service, leadership, and other activities that will help them stand out.
[00:29:11] The “Brag Binder” Strategy. Keeping a binder or digital folder of all achievements and awards helps kids see their strengths and makes application prep easier down the line.
[00:32:05] Addressing Uncertainty About Majors and Careers. A lot of students don’t know what they want to study. Focusing on core values and strengths can help guide that decision without pressure.
[00:37:00] The Value of Neutral Mentors. Sometimes teens need a safe, judgment-free space to open up about their goals, and having a neutral coach or mentor can make all the difference.
[00:38:11] Additional Resources. There are great resources – books, websites, and personal coaching – that families can tap into for support with college prep and making it debt free.
Next Steps:
- Join our FREE Training for Sports Moms - How to Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter's Mental Game so She Believes in Herself as Much as You Do
- Visit our podcast website for more great episodes
Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission and leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome back to the RaisingElite Competitors podcast.
(00:02):
I'm Coach Bre, a mentalperformance coach for girl
athletes, and I'm so excitedthat you're here listening to
this episode, which is a veryspecial one because of the guest
we got to bring in that willhelp all parents of middle
school and high school athleteswho are wanting to go to
college.
So Shelly Howard is our guesttoday, and she is.
(00:26):
The best when it comes tohelping students be ready for
the next level.
So that includes when to applyfor colleges, what the
application process looks like,what you should be doing as a
parent of an eighth grader,ninth grader, 10th, 11th, 12th
grader, in order to be prepared.
For college admission and Shellyis the founder of College Ready.
(00:48):
She has spent the last 18 yearshelping thousands of families
get into the right colleges andgraduate debt free.
She's a mom to four herself.
And every one of her kids wentto college debt-free, including
schools like Harvard, Alabama,and international programs.
So in this episode, she'ssharing what every mom or dad
needs to know about the journeytowards a debt-free college
(01:11):
experience, how athletics canbolster academic scholarships
and what to do if your athleteisn't sure what she wants to
study yet.
And this isn't just aboutathletic scholarships, I'm
talking about.
All the other opportunities thatare out there for students to go
to college and not have that bigburden of debt when they
graduate.
(01:31):
I'm also really excited becauseShelly is actually working
closely with our athletes InsideDream team.
Dream team is our.
Highest touch six month groupcoaching and individual coaching
program for competitive girlathletes who are wanting to play
at the next level.
So they get mental gamethroughout those six months.
They learn next level strategiesto help give them a competitive
(01:51):
edge, but they also every monthget to work with a special
expert in an area that they needin order to level up.
And one of those areas is.
College prep.
So Shelly is actually cominginto dream team.
She actually just came in at thetime of this recording.
She had just come in and done aworkshop with our dream team
athletes and she is in their,right now in their group chat
(02:13):
answering questions and helpingathletes specifically on what
their college ready plan is andhow to go to college debt free.
A lot of these athletes insideDream team are chasing after.
Scholarships at the next level,and Shelly is walking alongside
them to help them know the bestpath forward.
So I'm really excited for you tolisten to this because this is
an episode that will apply toall parents of athletes in
(02:35):
middle school and in high schoolthat are looking to college as
the next step after graduation.
Now, before I get into it, Iwanna give a shout out to
actually one of our dream teamathletes.
Her name is Abby.
And recently she introducedherself, and this is what she
wrote.
She said, I'm so thankful to begiven the opportunity to be
supported by these wonderfulcoaches all around me in this
(02:56):
program.
I joined Dream Team so that Icould work on my mental game and
I can strive to be as good of aplayer on the mental and the
physical side of basketball.
My biggest goal right now is tobe a thousand point score in
high school and to be looked atand recruited by at least a
division two college.
But division one is.
The goal, I'm most excited andlooking forward to learning
about the recruitment process,college Prep and NIL deals.
(03:19):
But I'm also really lookingforward to the care and rest our
body needs so we can thrive andplay to the best of our
abilities.
And I just wanna say, I'm sothankful and blessed to be given
this opportunity to work withthis amazing program and to work
with these amazing coaches.
So that is Abby.
She's one of our dream teamathletes for this season.
Season one of Dream Team runsfrom September to February.
We will be opening up season twothat will run, for six months,
(03:40):
starting in February of 2026.
So if Dream Team is somethingthat you think your daughter
would be a good fit for, theseare mostly high school athletes
who are at the top of theirgame.
Meaning that they're playing ontop teams, they're looking to
play at the next level.
If that sounds like yourathlete, then dream team might
be a really great fit.
(04:01):
So you will learn more, and hearmore about it.
If you're on our email list andyou can get our email list by
going to.
Train her game.com and you'll bein the loop with the next season
of Dream Team when we open thatup in December for enrollment.
All right, without further ado,here is this episode with the
wonderful Shelly Howard, thefounder of College Ready.
(04:21):
Please enjoy as much as Ienjoyed interviewing her.
All right, Shelly, welcome tothe podcast.
So excited to share.
Thank you for having me.
Yes, I am pumped to have you onthe podcast because, well, for a
lot of reasons, but one of whichis that you get to pour into our
(04:43):
athletes inside Dream team thismonth.
So at the time of.
Episode posting, you'll be inour group hanging out with our
athletes who are in dream team,giving them all the information
about college prep and collegereadiness, and what they should
be doing to position themselvesin the best way possible to not
only play at the next level, butthrive and, you know, all the
(05:04):
check, all the boxes that theyneed for the admissions and, and
all those things.
So really excited to dive intoit with you also here.
Will you though kick us off withjust a little intro.
I know you've been on thepodcast before, but a little bit
of an intro as to what you doand who you help.
Absolutely.
So, so happy to be here as ascholar athlete, myself and a
(05:26):
female competitor.
When I first met you, I waslike, I so wish I had somebody
like you on my side.
So, as far as myself, my name isShelly Howard and I am the
founder and CEO of collegeready.
I've actually helped people forover the 18 years.
Do the admissions process to getinto college and to graduate
(05:49):
without debt.
So we'll talk about both ofthose.
I'm a mother of four, two boys,two girls.
My son, attended Harvard uc, SanDiego Medical, and UCLA
Orthopedic surgery.
He is now 31 and he was acompetitive soccer player and he
rode crew for Harvard, so healso was a scholar athlete.
(06:12):
My second was a competitivecheerleader, very elite
competitive cheerleader, and shewent to the University of
Alabama.
Her dream school graduated fromtheir debt-free and she's now a
pediatric emergency room nurse.
My third went to San FranciscoState.
He was a competitor in the worldof lifeguarding.
(06:34):
So all things water and waterpolo.
And, my fourth, she wantednothing to do with sports.
Okay.
And she wanted to go a totallydifferent path.
And so it was fun.
She ended up going to Prague,studying international business
in Europe.
(06:55):
All four have now graduatedcollege and I am now in my new
season of planning two weddings.
So, so excited parents to sharewith you all of the wisdom of
getting into college and how tobe a scholar athlete with, still
keeping your mind on your money.
Hmm.
I love that.
That sounds great.
Because I think parents that arelistening, we have kids of all
(07:19):
varying ages.
So if your daughter is or son isjust maybe even starting middle
school, we have listeners who,you know, they're just.
They're 12, 11, 12 years old,and they're listening.
And then we have some on theopposite end of the spectrum.
Like they're flying out thisyear or next year and so, and
everything in between.
So I'm hoping that what youshare today, and I know that it
will kinda be applicable to, youknow, wherever they are in the
(07:41):
journey.
I know that there's more, morepressure for those parents of
juniors and seniors, but I thinkthis is good knowledge for
everybody.
I wanna start out with, I mean,you've helped, like you said,
thousands of families navigatethis process.
What's one of the mistakes,what's some of the number one
mistakes that you see familiesof athletes or even non-athletes
make when it comes to planningfor college or the next step?
(08:05):
We start there for sure.
So we always have to start withthis painful one.
The best way I can help youthink of this, parents is
lacking the plan is.
Is really the biggest problem.
Mm-hmm.
So many people think that theirchild is the next greatest
thing.
And I did, all of my kids, Ithought they were amazing.
(08:28):
You know, you see'em on thesoccer field when they're three.
These, some kids just naturallyhave that athletic talent or the
academic talent, whichever.
And so at that point.
You might be thinking, we'rejust gonna chase an athletic
scholarship, or we're just goingto, you know, go in on one
sport, or what does that looklike?
(08:49):
So I would say the biggestmistake that I see for scholar
athletes is that they put all oftheir eggs in one basket instead
of having a plan A, A, B, and aC, or we call it D one, D two
and D three.
Yeah.
I mean, because obviously wehave a lot of athletes that are
in our community and in ourworld and time after time, you
(09:13):
know, we do kind of these, theseintake surveys of when they come
into the elite mental game and Iask them what your goals are,
and I would say 90% of them sayto play division one, whatever
their sport is and.
The statistics are just notthere, to support that.
You know, that most athletes arenot going to, and I'm not saying
(09:35):
that to like burst their bubblesbecause, a lot are, and
especially those athletes thatare inside Dream team with us,
like they are at that level, butfor the majority, it's probably
not going to be a full ridedivision one athletic
scholarship.
Correct.
What would it be instead?
So here's the thing I likefamilies to, to understand is
(09:56):
college is a business.
And I say this all of the timebecause if you really start to
think about college as abusiness and not as this dream
of the future, it's a lot easierto understand the thought
process that goes into it.
So if your sport generates moneyfor the university.
(10:17):
There's more money available forthat sport.
Mm-hmm.
If your sport doesn't generateany money for the university,
there's a lot less money.
Right.
It's just pure business, moneyin, money out.
So, and again, I never dissuadeor discourage ever for any
student, if that's their dream,go get it and go all in.
(10:41):
But I also am here to be honestwith families and say.
You can have the dream ofathletics, but with one injury,
that dream can fade awayquickly.
And what else are you gonna havea plan for?
So we call it plan A, plan B,plan C.
Plan A is let them dream, letthem go.
Full ride if that's what they'redreaming.
(11:02):
And then we know if they're notall League All State, if they're
not being sought after by a Done coach, they might need to
start really laying out D 2Dthree.
And that's not a bad thing.
But if you want money, you wannabe thinking they need to take
the S-A-T-A-C-T, they need tohave a high GPA.
(11:25):
They need to have a standoutstrategy.
So.
That's the, in a perfect world,that's what I'd recommend for
families is to be mindful of,yes, having a brilliant, you
know, athletic coach and usingthe dream team and what we're
talking about today.
But like anything else, we knowbetter that we need a backup
(11:47):
plan.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
And so even like, aside fromathletics at the college level.
Because some parents that arelistening are like, yeah, my
daughter actually, she probablywon't play her sport in college.
What else exists out there tohelp families go to college?
(12:07):
Graduate college debt free.
'cause that's a pretty amazingthing.
Right.
And if I didn't do it myself, Iprobably wouldn't believe it to
be true.
I was middle class family and,living in California and my kids
were blonde hair and blue whiteand really didn't have a
terrible life.
And so I'm thinking, who's gonnagive them money?
(12:28):
You know?
Yeah.
And what I realized when Ihelped my firstborn go through
this process, he applied to 12schools, got into 11, had seven
full rides.
So I'm gonna just tell yourlisteners, this is what it comes
down to.
What is on their resume again,college is a business.
If I come to you, listener and Isay, I really wanna work for
(12:52):
you, I wanna go so bad.
Like I, I'll do whatever ittakes.
And you say, great.
Show me your experience.
What have you done?
And I'm like, oh, wow.
Yeah.
Kind of too busy to build aresume.
Don't really have one, but Ireally, really, really wanna go
with you.
And you say, then I'll pay youminimum wage.
(13:12):
There's no scholarships.
Mm-hmm.
But child number two comes toyou and they say, I really wanna
work for you.
And you go, great.
How are you going to do when youget here and you go, oh, look at
three page resume.
I could run your company.
I have proof.
I've led, I've got servicehours.
(13:32):
I've I, I am the candidatethat's gonna make your life so
easy that you could truly leaveand go on vacation.
And they're like, wow, I have alot of money available to you.
Mm-hmm.
And college is the same way.
If your child has a high GPA anda high test score, that will get
them into a college, but that'snot gonna set them apart at an
(13:55):
elite college.
Mm-hmm.
At a, at a basic college, yes,that could be, but most of the
big money comes from picking theright college for the right
student.
That is the right academic fit,the social fit, the athletic
fit, and the financial fit.
So let's talk about the academicfit.
Do you want your student to bethe big fish in the small C or
(14:16):
the small fish in the big C?
Mm-hmm.
Do you want them to fight forevery A with every other genius
student at an Ivy League?
Right?
Is that something that's gonnabe mentally okay for them?
Some students, yes.
I have lots of them in myprogram and some of them, no way
that will sink their shit.
Then you have test scores.
(14:38):
Right.
Somebody's gonna have a highertest score.
Somebody's a lower, there's notest optional.
Don't believe it for a minute.
You need a good test scorebecause if you have a high GPA
and a low test score, collegesthink easy as cheating or
massive test TE test anxiety.
You don't want any of that to beconsidered.
(15:00):
Yeah.
So you need to have a solidplatform.
Those are two.
Now you wanna think what else isthere?
This is what gets youscholarships at what?
It's what gets you accepted.
And that is what is your passionwith purpose?
What have you done todemonstrate the major you wanna
(15:22):
go into or the career thatyou're dreaming of?
Or your future, what have youdone?
So I can be like, oh my gosh,they're gonna excel at my
university.
Mm-hmm.
So much so they're gonna comeand lead others to be great
here.
Guess who pays for that?
The university pays for that.
Mm-hmm.
(15:42):
It's like a, volleyball coach ata university.
If you come to them and you'revery tall and you're a spike.
Outside hitter and you have minikills, they're gonna pay for
that, right?
If you walk under the net likeme, they're not gonna probably
pay me much money because Iwould not be a good outside
(16:06):
hitter.
Mm-hmm.
So it all comes down to whathave you done to set yourself
apart.
The second thing is they aregonna ask, who are you?
Not you the parents.
The student.
Mm-hmm.
Because if the student canarticulate how amazing they are,
(16:27):
right?
How many records they've broke,how many stats they can share,
how fast they can run video, themore they can prove their
greatness, the more moneythere's available.
Mm-hmm.
So it really comes down to.
What do you wanna spend yourtime and energy on?
(16:48):
Do you wanna be the very, verybest, but you're too small for
your sport?
Mm-hmm.
Reality, some of us are just notbuilt, and that's why I use
myself as an example.
I love sand volleyball so much,but in the sand I lose about
another foot so I can reallywalk underneath the net.
(17:10):
And so I knew as much as I lovevolleyball.
I was never gonna play.
Never other than intramural oron the beach on the weekend.
Mm-hmm.
And that's okay.
I still want all of the studentsto know that they can do it, but
they need to be very carefulwhen they choose to only have
(17:31):
one plan.
A.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That, that's huge.
And don't think you canoveremphasize that.
And I know that we probably haveparents listening who are
wondering like about.
Their mind might go to, what'sthe recruiting process?
What's the difference betweenDivision one two?
We talked about that and that'swhy we, we have a recruiting
expert inside Dream team who ismore specific to those type of
(17:51):
questions, but what you'resaying is.
Honestly more important or youknow, just as if not more
important because you're alsotalking like fit for the
student.
And so what do you oftenrecommend parents do to help
their, child figure that out?
Like, where do they even start?
Because I hear, you know, inworking with kids, they're like,
I'm just gonna go, I'm gonna goto school in San Diego because I
(18:13):
love the beach.
Or like.
I'm gonna go to Florida becauseI wanna be on, I wanna be on the
beach, I wanna be sunny all thetime.
And that's like their basis forhow they choose schools, right?
And so the first thing I wouldhelp, families remember is
they're only 15, 16, 17, and 18.
I don't know about you parents,but I was a little squirrely
back then and I didn't have mywhole future figured out.
(18:37):
So the problem is colleges areforcing them.
To have it figured out.
So because we know that we, asadult, I say we as a village,
right?
It come, it comes down to whatyou're doing in the Dream team,
what I'm doing at college ready.
Mm-hmm.
And you, the parent, like, howdo we really support this young
(18:58):
person?
Because nobody at their highschool's gonna be helping them
do this.
Right.
If you think they are, ask themhow many times their high school
counselor talked about gettingrecruited at a college, or how
will the family pay for collegeor get scholarships?
You'll figure out very soon,this is up to you and them if
you wanna do it alone.
(19:19):
Otherwise you get support.
So here's the thing.
You wanna be mindful of how.
Do I help and support them?
Well, if they're a teenager andthey don't even wanna talk to
you about what they did atschool today or what they ate
for lunch, this is gonna beincredibly painful for your
family.
Yeah, I paid somebody to workwith my second daughter because
(19:43):
we had a little bit more of achallenging relationship when
she was a teenager.
My first three, not so much Icould talk about anything and
everything.
Different child, differentsituation.
So knowing your child is thefirst place you wanna start.
If you have a child that answersyou more than yes or no, let's
(20:06):
really get clarity there.
Yeah, that's right.
And they wanna share, right?
They're, they're like, thishappened and this happened, and
I, you know, that they're veryexcited to share with you.
Congratulations.
That's a wonderful thing.
And you wanna start asking them.
Open-ended questions, and here'sthe first one I always ask a
(20:26):
student, who are you?
If they look at you with bigeyes and shrug, you have a lot
of work ahead of yourself.
If they're, well, I'm yourdaughter, okay?
They recognize you as leadingtheir family, but that's not
what's gonna get them intocollege.
Or, I am a rugby player.
(20:49):
Okay, great.
That's, that's one of theiridentities.
But if they stop there, that'sjust as dangerous because if
they get injured and now theydon't have another identity,
they're gonna really strugglewith who am I?
Mm-hmm.
So helping them get clarity, andhere's what you're gonna ask
them if they get stuck on this,I want you to say, what would
(21:12):
your best friend tell me who youare?
Hmm.
And now they're like, oh yeah.
They would say, I'm considerate,I'm a great friend.
And oh, well, did they lie?
No, of course they wonderful.
Now what would your grandparentor aunt or uncle, tell you?
And they're like, oh, theyalways brag and it's so
(21:35):
embarrassing, and I'm like,great, that's what I wanna hear.
Tell me what they would say.
And they're like, okay.
And then they tell you andyou're like, did they lie?
And you're like, no, but it's soembarrassing.
I'm like, listen, if you can'ttell me how are you going to
tell colleges or a coach howamazing you are?
(21:57):
I know that we've taught you.
Don't brag, don't boast.
People don't like it.
And now we have to teach them,give us a reason.
To hire you, to bring you intoour team, to bring you into our
college because parents,colleges don't wanna hear from
you.
Yeah, they really don't either.
(22:17):
Just does the admissions office,and so if you reach out to the
admissions office, they make anote in your file.
The child's too immature.
That's not what we want on theirfile.
So hopefully did that answeryour question?
Yeah.
Yeah.
That is so helpful to just kindof start even the conversation
(22:37):
with your daughter, with yourson, about like what the
possibilities might open up.
Mm-hmm.
I am curious, can you give us alittle bit of a timeline if
we're talking like, we haveparents of eighth graders or
incoming freshmen, you know, allthe way through senior year.
What they should be consideringand doing at each of those
(23:00):
stages.
So number one is, we startworking with students in middle
school.
It could be seventh grade, itcould be eighth grade.
Mm-hmm.
It gives them a longer runway.
And what I mean by that is itgives them more time to start
doing this self-analysis, theself-realization, this ability
(23:20):
to talk about what they'veaccomplished.
Versus taking them at the veryend.
So I want to praise you ifyou're there, but let's get
real.
Not everybody's there.
I do this for a living and I'mmeeting with high school seniors
right now who still cannot picka college, and they're panicking
and they're absolutely terrifiedbecause applications are now
(23:42):
happening.
Mm-hmm.
And so I wanna speak to thewhole listener group.
And so the timeline looks likethis.
Colleges start to pay attention,they start allowing you to brag,
I guess is the right word, tostart to, get clarity when the
student promotes from eighthgrade.
(24:03):
So all of the community service,all of the extracurriculars, all
of the sports teams, club, so onand so forth.
That summer between eighth gradeand the freshman year in high
school is the one most studentsskip.
Mm-hmm.
They have fun.
They're enjoying the beach.
They're just really having agreat time.
(24:25):
And don't stop doing that.
Yeah.
But be mindful.
What else could they be doing toalso help them be thinking about
who am I, what do I wanna do formy future, and how am I gonna
get there?
And it could be super fun.
My daughter created Dress ofHope where her and her
girlfriends taught themself howto sew little dresses out of
(24:47):
pillowcase and send them allover the world because they
thought that every little girlshould know what it feels like
to wear a pretty little dress.
Aw.
That's what they did with theirsummer.
Is that like child labor?
No, they had.
So much fun pizza parties everyFriday night having a blast with
their friends.
So please know, I'm not sayingget intense about this.
(25:10):
I'm saying give themopportunities to explore.
And so that's step one.
That is a middle school.
They are exploring communityservice.
They're exploring leadership.
They're exploring their sport.
They are really starting to getclarity of what are my gifts and
what are my talents?
Okay?
Mm-hmm.
Then by the time they hit theirfreshman year, everybody's gonna
(25:34):
hit it different.
If you have a student who isstarting their freshman year in
algebra two, they're on a verydifferent path than a student
who is starting in algebra oneor math before that.
So just know that I can't speakspecifically on a podcast that
needs generalities, right?
(25:56):
But I want to all know I havestudents who take the SAT and
the A CT their freshman year andget a perfect score.
Is that every child?
No way.
I have some that need to takeit.
Multiple times throughout theiryears, and they're still taking
it their senior year.
So please know, we help studentsfrom a 2.8 GPA all the way to a
(26:16):
5.0.
So everybody has their own pathand we teach them to stay in
their own lane of greatness.
So what does that timeline looklike you wanna have your four
year academic plan set as soonas possible.
You wanna have your teststrategy.
What ap, IB and dual enrollmentwill you take?
(26:37):
When will you take theP-S-A-T-S-A-T and a CT?
You want to have a plan for whatCommunity service or passion
with purpose project that you'regoing to lead.
What are you gonna do for yourextracurriculars?
Remember, the common app asksfor 10 activities, honors and
awards that you see.
Application asks for 20.
(26:59):
And so if you wait, it is a verystressful time.
Yeah.
And then you get into letters ofrecommendation.
What teachers are you going toask?
Have a plan now.
Don't wait until it's too late.
And then essays, are you a goodessay writer?
If you're not, you wanna be.
Mm-hmm.
So making sure that your childhas one enough essay topics to
(27:23):
write about, and two, that theywrite well.
Okay.
Colleges know if they use AIcolleges, know your parents
write it.
So don't think for a moment thatyou can get through this without
doing all of this on your own.
Yeah.
And I know that's somethingyou're gonna be helping our
(27:43):
dream team athletes withspecifically, because I think
it's too easy, too easy thattemptation of like, child GBT
write this for me.
But it's so, so easy to spotnowadays.
Okay.
That was all super informativeand awesome.
I can't remember if it was youthat recommended this, but I
remember, I don't know, itpopped into my head that I'm
gonna start doing with my kidsis like, make a binder.
(28:04):
Were you saying that with likemm-hmm.
The, yeah.
Can you explain that?
Like for the moms and dads whoare maybe earlier on in the
journey just to start working?
Sure, sure.
I think it's important.
So I started doing it in aboutthird grade, and I know that
seems really early, but why Idid it is so I could show my
child how amazing they are,right?
(28:26):
So many times they get the, thisaward for perfect attendance.
Which is so, it seems so little,but if that meant a lot for
them, put it in, I call it abrag binder.
Mm-hmm.
Put it in their brag binder andyou don't have to talk about it
all the time, but when they'refeeling low or they're feeling
like I'm not really smart, orI'm not very good, pull out the
(28:47):
brag binder and.
Did you not really accomplishthis?
So I started young just to helpthem to build that awareness.
Especially as an athlete, right?
I mean mm-hmm.
It the first yellow card my songot in soccer, I celebrated
parents.
I'm sorry if that seems wrong toyou.
Oh yeah.
But he was the most timid child.
(29:08):
He'd run away from any type ofcontact with other.
Children, well mm-hmm.
That's soccer.
And so I remember I took apicture of a yellow card and I
put it in there and I said, thatwas a big deal for you.
Yeah.
Like you learned how to play thegame.
Mm-hmm.
And so you do it for sports, youdo it for academia, but when you
(29:30):
start to do it for college iswhen they promote from eighth
grade and that's when you startto keep track of all of their
academic hours.
Or their academic awards, anytype of honor, any type of
community service, anything thatyou can show them.
Here's an example of when youled somebody.
Mm-hmm.
(29:50):
Here's an example of when youwere voted, best athlete to
coach, whatever that is.
Yeah.
And so a brag binder serves twopurposes.
One, it's your memory.
Let's be honest, parents, we'redriving our kids everywhere.
If you have more than one, it'sreally hard to keep track.
Even with one, it's hard to keeptrack.
(30:11):
And the other thing is, Istarted, now that we have our
phones with us everywhere, Istarted a, a photo folder that I
kept each of my children'shonors and awards and I just had
pictures.
And so I would keep all of theirpictures in one folder.
And that was a good way to notforget all of the amazing things
(30:32):
they've done.
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
I love that.
And super practical.
Okay.
This is great, chill.
I do have one more question foryou.
It's kind of a broad one becauseit was what we were chatting
about before we startedrecording.
It was something that, you know,you've been hearing from
parents.
I just asked you, what are you,what are you hearing from
parents in your community?
What are they worried about?
And I think it's a big one.
(30:52):
So can you explain what that isand kind of what your response
has been to the parents who areworried?
Absolutely.
So, for your listeners, and whenI'm on a podcast, I will.
Often give 30 minutes of my timeto answer specific questions.
So families call me up and or wehop on a zoom call, sorry.
(31:12):
And I will ask, you know, whatgot you on the call today?
And I would say right now,probably over the last six
months, nine outta 10 will startout by saying, my child doesn't
know what they want to major in.
They don't know what they wantfor a career.
They are feeling stressed outand overwhelmed and can you help
them?
(31:33):
And it's been pretty consistent.
And so when you asked meearlier, that was the first
thing that came to mind.
And parents, if you have thatchild or you're feeling that
way, go to college ready Planinfo.
It's the best way you get 30minutes with me where we get to
talk about that one questionthat you have that's been
(31:54):
burning or that support.
And I will, I will happily.
Answer that, but I'm gonna giveit to the majority of you and
then you can navigate it.
Mm-hmm.
So the very first thing you wantto be mindful of is, is your
child the kind of student whostudies really, really, really
(32:16):
hard for their be or do they, itlooks like they're never
studying and they get all As.
That, that's the first thing Iwant you to be thinking about.
Mm-hmm.
'cause you have to stay intheir, I call it their area of
genius, whatever that is.
If you have an academia studentwho is like, tell me more.
Give me another book.
(32:37):
Can we go to the library?
Like it's just relentless.
I had one of those and you'relike.
Just chill, like have fun, likewhat are you doing?
Because I wasn't like that.
And so I remember like itfeeling heavy, but it wasn't him
that was feeling heavy.
It was me.
Mm-hmm.
And I.
I'm like, wait a minute, this ismy issue, not his.
(33:01):
He's asking for this, not me.
And then I had my second childand she was like, I don't like
reading.
Why do you always make me read?
I wanna go out and play.
I wanna tumble, I wanna dogymnastics.
I want, she's a very physicalchild.
Mm-hmm.
And so I started looking at,wow, when we learn things, we
(33:23):
need to be in movement with her.
So, do you see where I'mheading?
Parents?
It's like knowing your child.
So then when it comes down tothe question that we were
talking about, how do we findthe right career, the right
major, I'll tell you how we doit.
The first thing we do is we helpthem figure out what are their
(33:44):
core values?
What are those things thatyou've instilled in them or that
they've come up with on theirown that is not gonna change by
the time they're in eighthgrade.
It is really rare.
That a core value will changeafter eighth grade.
So we wanna stay true to that,human being and keep them in
that area of, yes, this isimportant to me.
(34:08):
Then the next thing we do is wehelp them.
What are you really good at?
Mm-hmm.
And here's the challenge.
If you have a child that'sreally good at a lot of things,
this is a real thing.
It's harder for them to figurethis out.
Yeah, because they're reallygood at a lot of things and they
could go any which way for achild who's like, I am not
(34:30):
really good at much, but I'mreally super good at building
things, or I'm really great atdrawing, or they know this is a
superpower, it's a lot easier tohelp guide them.
But here's the thing.
I'm gonna be honest.
I'm a parent when I try to dothis with my own children.
They're like, you just don'twant me to be an artist, or you
(34:53):
just don't want me to be abotanist, or, you know, they,
they think it's me judging them,and it's really hard.
They're teenagers, right?
I, I don't wanna make this soundso easy that everybody's like,
great, I'm gonna just fix thisproblem.
That's not what's gonna happen.
So it's important to know yourchild.
(35:14):
If they will not open up to youand talk about why they wanna be
a botanist or why they wanna bean art artist, then you need to
have somebody else do it.
You need an a totally neutralparty to step in there to be
their coach, their mentor thatperson who has, I have no
(35:35):
opinion of what they wanna do.
Yeah.
And so they know.
If they tell me, I'm gonna belike, wow, that's really, that's
amazing.
Tell me more.
And they're like, oh yeah, so Iwanted da, da, da da da.
And before you know it, they'rejust downloading all of the
things that they're been keepingso pinned up.
They really do have a betteridea.
(35:56):
They're really scared thatsomebody's gonna judge them for
that idea and not, I'm notsaying parents, that's you, but
how they feel is their reality.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And that's what we need to givethem support with.
And that's why I love theprogram that you're doing.
Because it's offering a safespace for these young women,
(36:18):
young girls, young women, to askthe silly question, to not have
to know all the answers, to knowthat we're there as their
mentor, to support them withtheir dream and have no
judgment, right?
Mm-hmm.
None of us who's in this programis judging.
(36:38):
We're all leaning in going, howdo we get you there?
Yeah.
And that's why I think it'simportant that families know
sometimes it just can't be them.
Yeah.
So good.
So that is a perfect segue into,helping families know where they
can learn more to find more ofyour resources and, and all
(36:59):
that.
So, will you share, you know,what, what you've got as a next
step for them?
Absolutely.
So I'm a big giver, so I'm gonnagive you lots of opportunities.
Families, right now I have mytwo bestselling books.
How to Send Your Student ToCollege Without Losing Your Mind
or Your Money.
And the College Admissions Plansimplified both of them.
(37:20):
I have on Amazon at 99 cents foryou right now, so when this
drops, don't put.
Put it on the side, go and getit, because they will go back up
to, I think,$12.
So if you don't care, that'sokay.
Mm-hmm.
Then after that, college readyplan.com.
So it's college ready, PLAn.com.
(37:41):
That's our website.
I give a ton if you wanna knowwhere to get scholarships, if
you wanna know what they shoulddo over the summer, internships,
research projects, whatever thatis.
Go on that site.
If you're like, I just need 30minutes with you, or My child
needs 30 minutes with you,Shelly, go to college Ready Plan
info.
As I said, big giver.
(38:04):
And also in your program, I'mgiving two online classes.
One is called Passion with APurpose, and the other is
College Ready, debt free.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm excited for that.
So our dream team kiddos willget that this week.
They'll get to be with you livethis week.
You'll be in the, group chatwith us.
So really excited for all ofthat.
(38:25):
And also just thank you,Shelley, for being so generous
in sharing what you did ontoday's episode and also with
the other resources so thatparents can find more.
So thank you so much again.
It's been my pleasure.
Welcome back to the RaisingElite Competitors podcast.
(00:02):
I'm Coach Bre, a mentalperformance coach for girl
athletes, and I'm so excitedthat you're here listening to
this episode, which is a veryspecial one because of the guest
we got to bring in that willhelp all parents of middle
school and high school athleteswho are wanting to go to
college.
So Shelly Howard is our guesttoday, and she is.
(00:26):
The best when it comes tohelping students be ready for
the next level.
So that includes when to applyfor colleges, what the
application process looks like,what you should be doing as a
parent of an eighth grader,ninth grader, 10th, 11th, 12th
grader, in order to be prepared.
For college admission and Shellyis the founder of College Ready.
(00:48):
She has spent the last 18 yearshelping thousands of families
get into the right colleges andgraduate debt free.
She's a mom to four herself.
And every one of her kids wentto college debt-free, including
schools like Harvard, Alabama,and international programs.
So in this episode, she'ssharing what every mom or dad
needs to know about the journeytowards a debt-free college
(01:11):
experience, how athletics canbolster academic scholarships
and what to do if your athleteisn't sure what she wants to
study yet.
And this isn't just aboutathletic scholarships, I'm
talking about.
All the other opportunities thatare out there for students to go
to college and not have that bigburden of debt when they
graduate.
(01:31):
I'm also really excited becauseShelly is actually working
closely with our athletes InsideDream team.
Dream team is our.
Highest touch six month groupcoaching and individual coaching
program for competitive girlathletes who are wanting to play
at the next level.
So they get mental gamethroughout those six months.
They learn next level strategiesto help give them a competitive
(01:51):
edge, but they also every monthget to work with a special
expert in an area that they needin order to level up.
And one of those areas is.
College prep.
So Shelly is actually cominginto dream team.
She actually just came in at thetime of this recording.
She had just come in and done aworkshop with our dream team
athletes and she is in their,right now in their group chat
(02:13):
answering questions and helpingathletes specifically on what
their college ready plan is andhow to go to college debt free.
A lot of these athletes insideDream team are chasing after.
Scholarships at the next level,and Shelly is walking alongside
them to help them know the bestpath forward.
So I'm really excited for you tolisten to this because this is
an episode that will apply toall parents of athletes in
(02:35):
middle school and in high schoolthat are looking to college as
the next step after graduation.
Now, before I get into it, Iwanna give a shout out to
actually one of our dream teamathletes.
Her name is Abby.
And recently she introducedherself, and this is what she
wrote.
She said, I'm so thankful to begiven the opportunity to be
supported by these wonderfulcoaches all around me in this
(02:56):
program.
I joined Dream Team so that Icould work on my mental game and
I can strive to be as good of aplayer on the mental and the
physical side of basketball.
My biggest goal right now is tobe a thousand point score in
high school and to be looked atand recruited by at least a
division two college.
But division one is.
The goal, I'm most excited andlooking forward to learning
about the recruitment process,college Prep and NIL deals.
(03:19):
But I'm also really lookingforward to the care and rest our
body needs so we can thrive andplay to the best of our
abilities.
And I just wanna say, I'm sothankful and blessed to be given
this opportunity to work withthis amazing program and to work
with these amazing coaches.
So that is Abby.
She's one of our dream teamathletes for this season.
Season one of Dream Team runsfrom September to February.
We will be opening up season twothat will run, for six months,
(03:40):
starting in February of 2026.
So if Dream Team is somethingthat you think your daughter
would be a good fit for, theseare mostly high school athletes
who are at the top of theirgame.
Meaning that they're playing ontop teams, they're looking to
play at the next level.
If that sounds like yourathlete, then dream team might
be a really great fit.
(04:01):
So you will learn more, and hearmore about it.
If you're on our email list andyou can get our email list by
going to.
Train her game.com and you'll bein the loop with the next season
of Dream Team when we open thatup in December for enrollment.
All right, without further ado,here is this episode with the
wonderful Shelly Howard, thefounder of College Ready.
(04:21):
Please enjoy as much as Ienjoyed interviewing her.
All right, Shelly, welcome tothe podcast.
So excited to share.
Thank you for having me.
Yes, I am pumped to have you onthe podcast because, well, for a
lot of reasons, but one of whichis that you get to pour into our
(04:43):
athletes inside Dream team thismonth.
So at the time of.
Episode posting, you'll be inour group hanging out with our
athletes who are in dream team,giving them all the information
about college prep and collegereadiness, and what they should
be doing to position themselvesin the best way possible to not
only play at the next level, butthrive and, you know, all the
(05:04):
check, all the boxes that theyneed for the admissions and, and
all those things.
So really excited to dive intoit with you also here.
Will you though kick us off withjust a little intro.
I know you've been on thepodcast before, but a little bit
of an intro as to what you doand who you help.
Absolutely.
So, so happy to be here as ascholar athlete, myself and a
(05:26):
female competitor.
When I first met you, I waslike, I so wish I had somebody
like you on my side.
So, as far as myself, my name isShelly Howard and I am the
founder and CEO of collegeready.
I've actually helped people forover the 18 years.
Do the admissions process to getinto college and to graduate
(05:49):
without debt.
So we'll talk about both ofthose.
I'm a mother of four, two boys,two girls.
My son, attended Harvard uc, SanDiego Medical, and UCLA
Orthopedic surgery.
He is now 31 and he was acompetitive soccer player and he
rode crew for Harvard, so healso was a scholar athlete.
(06:12):
My second was a competitivecheerleader, very elite
competitive cheerleader, and shewent to the University of
Alabama.
Her dream school graduated fromtheir debt-free and she's now a
pediatric emergency room nurse.
My third went to San FranciscoState.
He was a competitor in the worldof lifeguarding.
(06:34):
So all things water and waterpolo.
And, my fourth, she wantednothing to do with sports.
Okay.
And she wanted to go a totallydifferent path.
And so it was fun.
She ended up going to Prague,studying international business
in Europe.
(06:55):
All four have now graduatedcollege and I am now in my new
season of planning two weddings.
So, so excited parents to sharewith you all of the wisdom of
getting into college and how tobe a scholar athlete with, still
keeping your mind on your money.
Hmm.
I love that.
That sounds great.
Because I think parents that arelistening, we have kids of all
(07:19):
varying ages.
So if your daughter is or son isjust maybe even starting middle
school, we have listeners who,you know, they're just.
They're 12, 11, 12 years old,and they're listening.
And then we have some on theopposite end of the spectrum.
Like they're flying out thisyear or next year and so, and
everything in between.
So I'm hoping that what youshare today, and I know that it
will kinda be applicable to, youknow, wherever they are in the
(07:41):
journey.
I know that there's more, morepressure for those parents of
juniors and seniors, but I thinkthis is good knowledge for
everybody.
I wanna start out with, I mean,you've helped, like you said,
thousands of families navigatethis process.
What's one of the mistakes,what's some of the number one
mistakes that you see familiesof athletes or even non-athletes
make when it comes to planningfor college or the next step?
(08:05):
We start there for sure.
So we always have to start withthis painful one.
The best way I can help youthink of this, parents is
lacking the plan is.
Is really the biggest problem.
Mm-hmm.
So many people think that theirchild is the next greatest
thing.
And I did, all of my kids, Ithought they were amazing.
(08:28):
You know, you see'em on thesoccer field when they're three.
These, some kids just naturallyhave that athletic talent or the
academic talent, whichever.
And so at that point.
You might be thinking, we'rejust gonna chase an athletic
scholarship, or we're just goingto, you know, go in on one
sport, or what does that looklike?
(08:49):
So I would say the biggestmistake that I see for scholar
athletes is that they put all oftheir eggs in one basket instead
of having a plan A, A, B, and aC, or we call it D one, D two
and D three.
Yeah.
I mean, because obviously wehave a lot of athletes that are
in our community and in ourworld and time after time, you
(09:13):
know, we do kind of these, theseintake surveys of when they come
into the elite mental game and Iask them what your goals are,
and I would say 90% of them sayto play division one, whatever
their sport is and.
The statistics are just notthere, to support that.
You know, that most athletes arenot going to, and I'm not saying
(09:35):
that to like burst their bubblesbecause, a lot are, and
especially those athletes thatare inside Dream team with us,
like they are at that level, butfor the majority, it's probably
not going to be a full ridedivision one athletic
scholarship.
Correct.
What would it be instead?
So here's the thing I likefamilies to, to understand is
(09:56):
college is a business.
And I say this all of the timebecause if you really start to
think about college as abusiness and not as this dream
of the future, it's a lot easierto understand the thought
process that goes into it.
So if your sport generates moneyfor the university.
(10:17):
There's more money available forthat sport.
Mm-hmm.
If your sport doesn't generateany money for the university,
there's a lot less money.
Right.
It's just pure business, moneyin, money out.
So, and again, I never dissuadeor discourage ever for any
student, if that's their dream,go get it and go all in.
(10:41):
But I also am here to be honestwith families and say.
You can have the dream ofathletics, but with one injury,
that dream can fade awayquickly.
And what else are you gonna havea plan for?
So we call it plan A, plan B,plan C.
Plan A is let them dream, letthem go.
Full ride if that's what they'redreaming.
(11:02):
And then we know if they're notall League All State, if they're
not being sought after by a Done coach, they might need to
start really laying out D 2Dthree.
And that's not a bad thing.
But if you want money, you wannabe thinking they need to take
the S-A-T-A-C-T, they need tohave a high GPA.
(11:25):
They need to have a standoutstrategy.
So.
That's the, in a perfect world,that's what I'd recommend for
families is to be mindful of,yes, having a brilliant, you
know, athletic coach and usingthe dream team and what we're
talking about today.
But like anything else, we knowbetter that we need a backup
(11:47):
plan.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
And so even like, aside fromathletics at the college level.
Because some parents that arelistening are like, yeah, my
daughter actually, she probablywon't play her sport in college.
What else exists out there tohelp families go to college?
(12:07):
Graduate college debt free.
'cause that's a pretty amazingthing.
Right.
And if I didn't do it myself, Iprobably wouldn't believe it to
be true.
I was middle class family and,living in California and my kids
were blonde hair and blue whiteand really didn't have a
terrible life.
And so I'm thinking, who's gonnagive them money?
(12:28):
You know?
Yeah.
And what I realized when Ihelped my firstborn go through
this process, he applied to 12schools, got into 11, had seven
full rides.
So I'm gonna just tell yourlisteners, this is what it comes
down to.
What is on their resume again,college is a business.
If I come to you, listener and Isay, I really wanna work for
(12:52):
you, I wanna go so bad.
Like I, I'll do whatever ittakes.
And you say, great.
Show me your experience.
What have you done?
And I'm like, oh, wow.
Yeah.
Kind of too busy to build aresume.
Don't really have one, but Ireally, really, really wanna go
with you.
And you say, then I'll pay youminimum wage.
(13:12):
There's no scholarships.
Mm-hmm.
But child number two comes toyou and they say, I really wanna
work for you.
And you go, great.
How are you going to do when youget here and you go, oh, look at
three page resume.
I could run your company.
I have proof.
I've led, I've got servicehours.
(13:32):
I've I, I am the candidatethat's gonna make your life so
easy that you could truly leaveand go on vacation.
And they're like, wow, I have alot of money available to you.
Mm-hmm.
And college is the same way.
If your child has a high GPA anda high test score, that will get
them into a college, but that'snot gonna set them apart at an
(13:55):
elite college.
Mm-hmm.
At a, at a basic college, yes,that could be, but most of the
big money comes from picking theright college for the right
student.
That is the right academic fit,the social fit, the athletic
fit, and the financial fit.
So let's talk about the academicfit.
Do you want your student to bethe big fish in the small C or
(14:16):
the small fish in the big C?
Mm-hmm.
Do you want them to fight forevery A with every other genius
student at an Ivy League?
Right?
Is that something that's gonnabe mentally okay for them?
Some students, yes.
I have lots of them in myprogram and some of them, no way
that will sink their shit.
Then you have test scores.
(14:38):
Right.
Somebody's gonna have a highertest score.
Somebody's a lower, there's notest optional.
Don't believe it for a minute.
You need a good test scorebecause if you have a high GPA
and a low test score, collegesthink easy as cheating or
massive test TE test anxiety.
You don't want any of that to beconsidered.
(15:00):
Yeah.
So you need to have a solidplatform.
Those are two.
Now you wanna think what else isthere?
This is what gets youscholarships at what?
It's what gets you accepted.
And that is what is your passionwith purpose?
What have you done todemonstrate the major you wanna
(15:22):
go into or the career thatyou're dreaming of?
Or your future, what have youdone?
So I can be like, oh my gosh,they're gonna excel at my
university.
Mm-hmm.
So much so they're gonna comeand lead others to be great
here.
Guess who pays for that?
The university pays for that.
Mm-hmm.
(15:42):
It's like a, volleyball coach ata university.
If you come to them and you'revery tall and you're a spike.
Outside hitter and you have minikills, they're gonna pay for
that, right?
If you walk under the net likeme, they're not gonna probably
pay me much money because Iwould not be a good outside
(16:06):
hitter.
Mm-hmm.
So it all comes down to whathave you done to set yourself
apart.
The second thing is they aregonna ask, who are you?
Not you the parents.
The student.
Mm-hmm.
Because if the student canarticulate how amazing they are,
(16:27):
right?
How many records they've broke,how many stats they can share,
how fast they can run video, themore they can prove their
greatness, the more moneythere's available.
Mm-hmm.
So it really comes down to.
What do you wanna spend yourtime and energy on?
(16:48):
Do you wanna be the very, verybest, but you're too small for
your sport?
Mm-hmm.
Reality, some of us are just notbuilt, and that's why I use
myself as an example.
I love sand volleyball so much,but in the sand I lose about
another foot so I can reallywalk underneath the net.
(17:10):
And so I knew as much as I lovevolleyball.
I was never gonna play.
Never other than intramural oron the beach on the weekend.
Mm-hmm.
And that's okay.
I still want all of the studentsto know that they can do it, but
they need to be very carefulwhen they choose to only have
(17:31):
one plan.
A.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That, that's huge.
And don't think you canoveremphasize that.
And I know that we probably haveparents listening who are
wondering like about.
Their mind might go to, what'sthe recruiting process?
What's the difference betweenDivision one two?
We talked about that and that'swhy we, we have a recruiting
expert inside Dream team who ismore specific to those type of
(17:51):
questions, but what you'resaying is.
Honestly more important or youknow, just as if not more
important because you're alsotalking like fit for the
student.
And so what do you oftenrecommend parents do to help
their, child figure that out?
Like, where do they even start?
Because I hear, you know, inworking with kids, they're like,
I'm just gonna go, I'm gonna goto school in San Diego because I
(18:13):
love the beach.
Or like.
I'm gonna go to Florida becauseI wanna be on, I wanna be on the
beach, I wanna be sunny all thetime.
And that's like their basis forhow they choose schools, right?
And so the first thing I wouldhelp, families remember is
they're only 15, 16, 17, and 18.
I don't know about you parents,but I was a little squirrely
back then and I didn't have mywhole future figured out.
(18:37):
So the problem is colleges areforcing them.
To have it figured out.
So because we know that we, asadult, I say we as a village,
right?
It come, it comes down to whatyou're doing in the Dream team,
what I'm doing at college ready.
Mm-hmm.
And you, the parent, like, howdo we really support this young
(18:58):
person?
Because nobody at their highschool's gonna be helping them
do this.
Right.
If you think they are, ask themhow many times their high school
counselor talked about gettingrecruited at a college, or how
will the family pay for collegeor get scholarships?
You'll figure out very soon,this is up to you and them if
you wanna do it alone.
(19:19):
Otherwise you get support.
So here's the thing.
You wanna be mindful of how.
Do I help and support them?
Well, if they're a teenager andthey don't even wanna talk to
you about what they did atschool today or what they ate
for lunch, this is gonna beincredibly painful for your
family.
Yeah, I paid somebody to workwith my second daughter because
(19:43):
we had a little bit more of achallenging relationship when
she was a teenager.
My first three, not so much Icould talk about anything and
everything.
Different child, differentsituation.
So knowing your child is thefirst place you wanna start.
If you have a child that answersyou more than yes or no, let's
(20:06):
really get clarity there.
Yeah, that's right.
And they wanna share, right?
They're, they're like, thishappened and this happened, and
I, you know, that they're veryexcited to share with you.
Congratulations.
That's a wonderful thing.
And you wanna start asking them.
Open-ended questions, and here'sthe first one I always ask a
(20:26):
student, who are you?
If they look at you with bigeyes and shrug, you have a lot
of work ahead of yourself.
If they're, well, I'm yourdaughter, okay?
They recognize you as leadingtheir family, but that's not
what's gonna get them intocollege.
Or, I am a rugby player.
(20:49):
Okay, great.
That's, that's one of theiridentities.
But if they stop there, that'sjust as dangerous because if
they get injured and now theydon't have another identity,
they're gonna really strugglewith who am I?
Mm-hmm.
So helping them get clarity, andhere's what you're gonna ask
them if they get stuck on this,I want you to say, what would
(21:12):
your best friend tell me who youare?
Hmm.
And now they're like, oh yeah.
They would say, I'm considerate,I'm a great friend.
And oh, well, did they lie?
No, of course they wonderful.
Now what would your grandparentor aunt or uncle, tell you?
And they're like, oh, theyalways brag and it's so
(21:35):
embarrassing, and I'm like,great, that's what I wanna hear.
Tell me what they would say.
And they're like, okay.
And then they tell you andyou're like, did they lie?
And you're like, no, but it's soembarrassing.
I'm like, listen, if you can'ttell me how are you going to
tell colleges or a coach howamazing you are?
(21:57):
I know that we've taught you.
Don't brag, don't boast.
People don't like it.
And now we have to teach them,give us a reason.
To hire you, to bring you intoour team, to bring you into our
college because parents,colleges don't wanna hear from
you.
Yeah, they really don't either.
(22:17):
Just does the admissions office,and so if you reach out to the
admissions office, they make anote in your file.
The child's too immature.
That's not what we want on theirfile.
So hopefully did that answeryour question?
Yeah.
Yeah.
That is so helpful to just kindof start even the conversation
(22:37):
with your daughter, with yourson, about like what the
possibilities might open up.
Mm-hmm.
I am curious, can you give us alittle bit of a timeline if
we're talking like, we haveparents of eighth graders or
incoming freshmen, you know, allthe way through senior year.
What they should be consideringand doing at each of those
(23:00):
stages.
So number one is, we startworking with students in middle
school.
It could be seventh grade, itcould be eighth grade.
Mm-hmm.
It gives them a longer runway.
And what I mean by that is itgives them more time to start
doing this self-analysis, theself-realization, this ability
(23:20):
to talk about what they'veaccomplished.
Versus taking them at the veryend.
So I want to praise you ifyou're there, but let's get
real.
Not everybody's there.
I do this for a living and I'mmeeting with high school seniors
right now who still cannot picka college, and they're panicking
and they're absolutely terrifiedbecause applications are now
(23:42):
happening.
Mm-hmm.
And so I wanna speak to thewhole listener group.
And so the timeline looks likethis.
Colleges start to pay attention,they start allowing you to brag,
I guess is the right word, tostart to, get clarity when the
student promotes from eighthgrade.
(24:03):
So all of the community service,all of the extracurriculars, all
of the sports teams, club, so onand so forth.
That summer between eighth gradeand the freshman year in high
school is the one most studentsskip.
Mm-hmm.
They have fun.
They're enjoying the beach.
They're just really having agreat time.
(24:25):
And don't stop doing that.
Yeah.
But be mindful.
What else could they be doing toalso help them be thinking about
who am I, what do I wanna do formy future, and how am I gonna
get there?
And it could be super fun.
My daughter created Dress ofHope where her and her
girlfriends taught themself howto sew little dresses out of
(24:47):
pillowcase and send them allover the world because they
thought that every little girlshould know what it feels like
to wear a pretty little dress.
Aw.
That's what they did with theirsummer.
Is that like child labor?
No, they had.
So much fun pizza parties everyFriday night having a blast with
their friends.
So please know, I'm not sayingget intense about this.
(25:10):
I'm saying give themopportunities to explore.
And so that's step one.
That is a middle school.
They are exploring communityservice.
They're exploring leadership.
They're exploring their sport.
They are really starting to getclarity of what are my gifts and
what are my talents?
Okay?
Mm-hmm.
Then by the time they hit theirfreshman year, everybody's gonna
(25:34):
hit it different.
If you have a student who isstarting their freshman year in
algebra two, they're on a verydifferent path than a student
who is starting in algebra oneor math before that.
So just know that I can't speakspecifically on a podcast that
needs generalities, right?
(25:56):
But I want to all know I havestudents who take the SAT and
the A CT their freshman year andget a perfect score.
Is that every child?
No way.
I have some that need to takeit.
Multiple times throughout theiryears, and they're still taking
it their senior year.
So please know, we help studentsfrom a 2.8 GPA all the way to a
(26:16):
5.0.
So everybody has their own pathand we teach them to stay in
their own lane of greatness.
So what does that timeline looklike you wanna have your four
year academic plan set as soonas possible.
You wanna have your teststrategy.
What ap, IB and dual enrollmentwill you take?
(26:37):
When will you take theP-S-A-T-S-A-T and a CT?
You want to have a plan for whatCommunity service or passion
with purpose project that you'regoing to lead.
What are you gonna do for yourextracurriculars?
Remember, the common app asksfor 10 activities, honors and
awards that you see.
Application asks for 20.
(26:59):
And so if you wait, it is a verystressful time.
Yeah.
And then you get into letters ofrecommendation.
What teachers are you going toask?
Have a plan now.
Don't wait until it's too late.
And then essays, are you a goodessay writer?
If you're not, you wanna be.
Mm-hmm.
So making sure that your childhas one enough essay topics to
(27:23):
write about, and two, that theywrite well.
Okay.
Colleges know if they use AIcolleges, know your parents
write it.
So don't think for a moment thatyou can get through this without
doing all of this on your own.
Yeah.
And I know that's somethingyou're gonna be helping our
(27:43):
dream team athletes withspecifically, because I think
it's too easy, too easy thattemptation of like, child GBT
write this for me.
But it's so, so easy to spotnowadays.
Okay.
That was all super informativeand awesome.
I can't remember if it was youthat recommended this, but I
remember, I don't know, itpopped into my head that I'm
gonna start doing with my kidsis like, make a binder.
(28:04):
Were you saying that with likemm-hmm.
The, yeah.
Can you explain that?
Like for the moms and dads whoare maybe earlier on in the
journey just to start working?
Sure, sure.
I think it's important.
So I started doing it in aboutthird grade, and I know that
seems really early, but why Idid it is so I could show my
child how amazing they are,right?
(28:26):
So many times they get the, thisaward for perfect attendance.
Which is so, it seems so little,but if that meant a lot for
them, put it in, I call it abrag binder.
Mm-hmm.
Put it in their brag binder andyou don't have to talk about it
all the time, but when they'refeeling low or they're feeling
like I'm not really smart, orI'm not very good, pull out the
(28:47):
brag binder and.
Did you not really accomplishthis?
So I started young just to helpthem to build that awareness.
Especially as an athlete, right?
I mean mm-hmm.
It the first yellow card my songot in soccer, I celebrated
parents.
I'm sorry if that seems wrong toyou.
Oh yeah.
But he was the most timid child.
(29:08):
He'd run away from any type ofcontact with other.
Children, well mm-hmm.
That's soccer.
And so I remember I took apicture of a yellow card and I
put it in there and I said, thatwas a big deal for you.
Yeah.
Like you learned how to play thegame.
Mm-hmm.
And so you do it for sports, youdo it for academia, but when you
(29:30):
start to do it for college iswhen they promote from eighth
grade and that's when you startto keep track of all of their
academic hours.
Or their academic awards, anytype of honor, any type of
community service, anything thatyou can show them.
Here's an example of when youled somebody.
Mm-hmm.
(29:50):
Here's an example of when youwere voted, best athlete to
coach, whatever that is.
Yeah.
And so a brag binder serves twopurposes.
One, it's your memory.
Let's be honest, parents, we'redriving our kids everywhere.
If you have more than one, it'sreally hard to keep track.
Even with one, it's hard to keeptrack.
(30:11):
And the other thing is, Istarted, now that we have our
phones with us everywhere, Istarted a, a photo folder that I
kept each of my children'shonors and awards and I just had
pictures.
And so I would keep all of theirpictures in one folder.
And that was a good way to notforget all of the amazing things
(30:32):
they've done.
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
I love that.
And super practical.
Okay.
This is great, chill.
I do have one more question foryou.
It's kind of a broad one becauseit was what we were chatting
about before we startedrecording.
It was something that, you know,you've been hearing from
parents.
I just asked you, what are you,what are you hearing from
parents in your community?
What are they worried about?
And I think it's a big one.
(30:52):
So can you explain what that isand kind of what your response
has been to the parents who areworried?
Absolutely.
So, for your listeners, and whenI'm on a podcast, I will.
Often give 30 minutes of my timeto answer specific questions.
So families call me up and or wehop on a zoom call, sorry.
(31:12):
And I will ask, you know, whatgot you on the call today?
And I would say right now,probably over the last six
months, nine outta 10 will startout by saying, my child doesn't
know what they want to major in.
They don't know what they wantfor a career.
They are feeling stressed outand overwhelmed and can you help
them?
(31:33):
And it's been pretty consistent.
And so when you asked meearlier, that was the first
thing that came to mind.
And parents, if you have thatchild or you're feeling that
way, go to college ready Planinfo.
It's the best way you get 30minutes with me where we get to
talk about that one questionthat you have that's been
(31:54):
burning or that support.
And I will, I will happily.
Answer that, but I'm gonna giveit to the majority of you and
then you can navigate it.
Mm-hmm.
So the very first thing you wantto be mindful of is, is your
child the kind of student whostudies really, really, really
(32:16):
hard for their be or do they, itlooks like they're never
studying and they get all As.
That, that's the first thing Iwant you to be thinking about.
Mm-hmm.
'cause you have to stay intheir, I call it their area of
genius, whatever that is.
If you have an academia studentwho is like, tell me more.
Give me another book.
(32:37):
Can we go to the library?
Like it's just relentless.
I had one of those and you'relike.
Just chill, like have fun, likewhat are you doing?
Because I wasn't like that.
And so I remember like itfeeling heavy, but it wasn't him
that was feeling heavy.
It was me.
Mm-hmm.
And I.
I'm like, wait a minute, this ismy issue, not his.
(33:01):
He's asking for this, not me.
And then I had my second childand she was like, I don't like
reading.
Why do you always make me read?
I wanna go out and play.
I wanna tumble, I wanna dogymnastics.
I want, she's a very physicalchild.
Mm-hmm.
And so I started looking at,wow, when we learn things, we
(33:23):
need to be in movement with her.
So, do you see where I'mheading?
Parents?
It's like knowing your child.
So then when it comes down tothe question that we were
talking about, how do we findthe right career, the right
major, I'll tell you how we doit.
The first thing we do is we helpthem figure out what are their
(33:44):
core values?
What are those things thatyou've instilled in them or that
they've come up with on theirown that is not gonna change by
the time they're in eighthgrade.
It is really rare.
That a core value will changeafter eighth grade.
So we wanna stay true to that,human being and keep them in
that area of, yes, this isimportant to me.
(34:08):
Then the next thing we do is wehelp them.
What are you really good at?
Mm-hmm.
And here's the challenge.
If you have a child that'sreally good at a lot of things,
this is a real thing.
It's harder for them to figurethis out.
Yeah, because they're reallygood at a lot of things and they
could go any which way for achild who's like, I am not
(34:30):
really good at much, but I'mreally super good at building
things, or I'm really great atdrawing, or they know this is a
superpower, it's a lot easier tohelp guide them.
But here's the thing.
I'm gonna be honest.
I'm a parent when I try to dothis with my own children.
They're like, you just don'twant me to be an artist, or you
(34:53):
just don't want me to be abotanist, or, you know, they,
they think it's me judging them,and it's really hard.
They're teenagers, right?
I, I don't wanna make this soundso easy that everybody's like,
great, I'm gonna just fix thisproblem.
That's not what's gonna happen.
So it's important to know yourchild.
(35:14):
If they will not open up to youand talk about why they wanna be
a botanist or why they wanna bean art artist, then you need to
have somebody else do it.
You need an a totally neutralparty to step in there to be
their coach, their mentor thatperson who has, I have no
(35:35):
opinion of what they wanna do.
Yeah.
And so they know.
If they tell me, I'm gonna belike, wow, that's really, that's
amazing.
Tell me more.
And they're like, oh yeah, so Iwanted da, da, da da da.
And before you know it, they'rejust downloading all of the
things that they're been keepingso pinned up.
They really do have a betteridea.
(35:56):
They're really scared thatsomebody's gonna judge them for
that idea and not, I'm notsaying parents, that's you, but
how they feel is their reality.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And that's what we need to givethem support with.
And that's why I love theprogram that you're doing.
Because it's offering a safespace for these young women,
(36:18):
young girls, young women, to askthe silly question, to not have
to know all the answers, to knowthat we're there as their
mentor, to support them withtheir dream and have no
judgment, right?
Mm-hmm.
None of us who's in this programis judging.
(36:38):
We're all leaning in going, howdo we get you there?
Yeah.
And that's why I think it'simportant that families know
sometimes it just can't be them.
Yeah.
So good.
So that is a perfect segue into,helping families know where they
can learn more to find more ofyour resources and, and all
(36:59):
that.
So, will you share, you know,what, what you've got as a next
step for them?
Absolutely.
So I'm a big giver, so I'm gonnagive you lots of opportunities.
Families, right now I have mytwo bestselling books.
How to Send Your Student ToCollege Without Losing Your Mind
or Your Money.
And the College Admissions Plansimplified both of them.
(37:20):
I have on Amazon at 99 cents foryou right now, so when this
drops, don't put.
Put it on the side, go and getit, because they will go back up
to, I think,$12.
So if you don't care, that'sokay.
Mm-hmm.
Then after that, college readyplan.com.
So it's college ready, PLAn.com.
(37:41):
That's our website.
I give a ton if you wanna knowwhere to get scholarships, if
you wanna know what they shoulddo over the summer, internships,
research projects, whatever thatis.
Go on that site.
If you're like, I just need 30minutes with you, or My child
needs 30 minutes with you,Shelly, go to college Ready Plan
info.
As I said, big giver.
(38:04):
And also in your program, I'mgiving two online classes.
One is called Passion with APurpose, and the other is
College Ready, debt free.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm excited for that.
So our dream team kiddos willget that this week.
They'll get to be with you livethis week.
You'll be in the, group chatwith us.
So really excited for all ofthat.
(38:25):
And also just thank you,Shelley, for being so generous
in sharing what you did ontoday's episode and also with
the other resources so thatparents can find more.
So thank you so much again.
It's been my pleasure.
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