Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Hey, welcome back to real beautywith Ft.
Season six.
And this is episode five.
I'm currently getting organized.
It is Sunday night.
I'm doing all the fun chores,such as changing the bad sheets
during the washing.
All that other fun stuff that wetypically do on a Sunday to
(00:24):
prepare for the week ahead.
And.
This afternoon, I went to one ofmy favorite places in old town
spring.
It's called T cattle cafe.
And they literally do the besthigh tea.
It's I really try and go asoften as I can.
Cause I miss gongs.
(00:45):
Clotted cream and fresh jam fromthe UK.
Of course.
So anyway, after we had.
Hi T we were celebrating mygirlfriends.
Birthday.
Me and Luna rose decided to justwander around old town spring,
which if you haven't and youlive in the Houston area.
(01:06):
It is such a cute place.
Firstly, if you're British likeme, they have the British store.
So of course it makes me want tobuy.
Super overpriced products thatyou would pay like a core of the
price for at home, but it'sthose kind of homely comforts
that remind you of likechildhood or different memories.
(01:29):
Anyway.
We also went to a place called.
On a whim.
And.
Oh, my gosh, they have such cuteitems.
It's a mixture of, um, like theyhave jewelry.
They also have some like coreCesarea.
Boots shoes.
Um, and then they also have likereally cool clothing.
(01:51):
So of course.
And I'm sitting, looking at itright now.
Hence reminded me IM.
Firstly.
I am addicted to buying.
Any like jewelry that has snakeson it.
I don't know why I don'tparticularly want to look into
X.
I can't imagine any of the,like, I can't imagine it's going
to be positive, but anyway, Ijust love it.
(02:13):
And it's really difficult tofind.
I think it's probably becauseof.
I remember years ago whenBulgari came out with this
snake, like necklace and thatcollection, which is like
iconic.
Um, I guess I'm just alwaystrying to find like a cheap
dude.
Cause clearly I'll never buildforward Bokhari, but anyway, So.
(02:33):
They had two sets of.
Adorable like chic snakeearrings.
Of course I bought them.
And then they had.
Great jackets with like fringe,especially as we're coming up to
rodeo season in Houston.
So I purchased a denim jacketand the back of it has fringe,
(02:57):
but it's like DMT.
fringe.
Which I was like, oh my God,we're going extra.
So I double check with Luna.
I was like, do you think Ishould purchase this?
And of course she said, yes,mama.
I'll do it.
So now I'm like, we're clearly.
Going to be terrible influenceson one another, but anyway, Um,
it was a really fun.
(03:18):
Afternoon.
So highly, highly recommend.
Just go check out old townspraying.
They also have a really cool barcalled plain and level where
it's like great wine, greatatmosphere, and they have kind
of tap pass.
So, um, yeah, it's a cool kindof different local place and
(03:38):
that we certainly love going to.
What else has happened thisweek?
Well, I finally finished theaudio book version of spare.
So prince Harry's.
Um, and I can only imagine ifyou are so bear with me with my
podcasts and I'm about to do.
(03:59):
Uh, post tonight about it.
Um, you'll either.
Love this.
And I agree.
Or I find there's no,in-between, you're going to
instantly hate me and follow me.
That's fine.
It's your own province, but.
And, uh, thankfully.
One of my colleagues at work.
(04:20):
She started a book club for usto kind of talk about this,
which has been awesome.
So finally finished it thismorning.
And it was so good.
Like I appreciate, there'sdefinitely split opinions out
there.
I think this was him writing thebook as a fuck you to the press.
(04:41):
A little bit of kind of selftherapy for himself.
And also, I think it was moreclearly like a bit of a kind of
fuck you to your family that.
You can't continue to go silentin these circumstances.
So it's too long for me to.
(05:01):
Go into firstly, if you don'tknow the background about the
whole situation, um, But you'vebeen seeing in the press.
Um, and you're probablythinking.
Oh, my gosh.
Why is her life?
So shit.
Why are they complaining?
I thought they didn't want to bein the press.
(05:22):
And now they're in the press andnow they're doing the
documentary and they did thatinterview with Oprah on like,
How dare they speak against theRoyal family.
So I see all these headlines andspecifically journalists, such
as like piers Morgan, likeclearly have.
Not enough going on in theirlife that they have to fully
just spend.
(05:43):
A lot of dedicated time toattack individuals, which I find
is really sad.
But.
To me, what I find kind of mostconcerning just reading it is.
The press in the UKspecifically.
I'm like, God, it's so bad.
So bad.
(06:04):
And I feel we've been livinghere for.
Nearly nine years and don't getme wrong.
The press in the us.
I mean.
Um, the press globally is notideal, but Jesus.
I just looking back, like someof the articles that have been
written against Meghan Markleand prince Harry, I'm like, it's
actually appalling.
(06:26):
And for anyone who I've kind ofhad.
A little bit of a debate aboutI'm like, Oh, you need to do is
look back and think, imagine ifyou were in that situation or
that was you and your gangpeople messaged you or like funk
cover of like establishedmagazines saying.
Does gusting, racist, horriblethings.
(06:51):
Um, it just instantly makes methink of.
Um, Caroline flack who, if, youknow, especially my more
American listeners, Carline,flack was a TV present in the
UK.
And the UK press were justrelentless.
It was just constant.
(07:11):
And she ended up taking her ownlife and her mom tried to.
Um, do campaigns.
And there was a lot of stuff onInstagram and on the web,
because I mean it trended sayinglike, be kind right.
Um, like be kind to each otherand then literally within a
month, everything just goes backto normal guy.
(07:32):
And I think.
Oh, God.
Why are people so fucking mean?
So.
If you are of the opinion, thenyou think it's all bollix.
And do you think he just needsto kind of get over himself?
And so does she, and they justneed to kind of go back in their
home and stop speaking aboutlike their life.
I would highly recommend.
(07:53):
Just instead of just reading theheadlines and taking that.
Like face value.
Do some research, like look intoit.
And maybe take yourself out ofthat.
Like your own bubble and putyourself in someone else's shoes
and think, well, That must kindof sock.
And I think.
Again, regardless of like thedetails at the end of the day,
(08:16):
that was his family thatremained silent.
And I think that's really sadand I've deep as empathy for
anyone that doesn't get theright love and support from
their family.
Because it really is sad.
And for me, at least Harry istrying to stop that generational
cycle.
He's doing something about it.
(08:36):
And hopefully he will be a lotbetter.
Father compared to what he'sreceived, but anyway, I'm going
to get off my home.
And I will save this for my bootclub and Friday.
Um, and if you are still thething.
I promise.
It's going to be a greatepisode.
Um, I'm really, really excitedabout speaking to, um, Richie,
(08:57):
who is the editor publisher ofLCA Houston international
society news magazine.
And also the founder host ofinternational mother's day
surgery.
So, um, we had such an awesomeconversation, but anyway, I just
want to touch on just kind of mythoughts after finishing that
book.
And I'm so glad I dedicated timeto listen to.
(09:21):
Here, what he had to say.
Anyway enjoy and have a greatweek
francene (09:45):
How's it going?
Runchi (09:47):
Good as usual.
Very was a Today was not thatcrazy.
Just lining up with, uh, themillion things that I do.
francene (09:56):
Oh my gosh.
When I was reading your bio, Iwas like, there's so many
different directions I want to
Runchi (10:02):
go in I know.
I said, so is my day-to-daylife.
And my mom said, you're in townfrom India.
Oh wow.
After four years pandemic andall of that and just, it's been
four years and part of I know,of course we'd be jumping and
one of the most interesting partof my work is figuring out what
(10:24):
will I be wearing?
Yeah.
the entire week at least.
Yeah.
I mean, it's nice if you likefashion, which I do, but it's
exhausting.
francene (10:35):
Yeah.
It's a lot.
So do you lay everything out?
Runchi (10:40):
I, I definitely try.
Yeah.
And then whenever I don't try orI don't plan, I have to like the
variations of my event.
Like just before this I was on amessage with this one of my
friends and, you know, clientsand Bridge Klay, she's chairing
the, uh, evening in the parkMemorial Hermann, uh,
fundraiser.
Yeah.
She's a very, very, they have,she and her has been very big
(11:01):
donors and she's also a verygood friend of mine.
And I have been with mymagazine, been part of many
mainstream Houston events andthese are like from Opera Ball,
ballet Symphony, tiger BallSociety.
Then they, you know, hum Park.
I mean these are not somethingyou just cannot get up and go,
you know, Oh, for sure.
Although I've been one of thosepeople, I do not believe in
(11:23):
fashion being keeping up withthe Joneses.
I don't.
Because A, I cannot, because mycircle is, everyone's like, eh,
they're at least a millionaireSo I'm like, okay, you're like,
cannot compete.
But I'm very lucky that in aprofession I am in that I work
with a lot of fashion houses andI work with a lot of brands that
(11:45):
either sometimes be sponsors orthey just give me outfits.
Like Bulgur has given me likethe hundred$50 necklace to wear.
francene (11:54):
Oh my gosh.
You are living the dream.
Runchi (11:59):
That's like, that's amazing.
But I plan outfits
francene (12:02):
definitely.
I love it.
Well, you always look fabulous.
The more I see your Instagramand after meeting you in person,
you're a fabulous person.
Runchi (12:12):
I love your outfit of the day.
I think it's really nice.
I think everyone should do it.
People who are working, um,whoever don't like it, I always
say they don't have to see it,but I enjoy it.
I'm like, I like to see like, metoo.
It's, it keeps you cause I'mnosy.
It keeps you motivated to lookgood.
I feel it does important people,some might say it's showing off.
(12:32):
I don't see it that way becauseit's kind of fun.
Yeah.
Girls have always loved becausewomen have always loved to dress
up so,
francene (12:39):
I agree.
Plus I always feel it gives me abit more inspiration.
Mm-hmm.
to see what other people arewearing.
And I'm like, oh, that's a greatidea.
Let me copy it.
Yeah.
Let me see if
Runchi (12:50):
I can imagine.
Reina, I am of course a creatorof my own madness with, despite
my crazy schedule, I will comeup with these things like, oh my
God, I wanna buy this brightyellow color dress or something.
Yeah.
francene (13:05):
Yes.
I'm all about the color.
I try and avoid black.
I like it.
Yeah.
Runchi (13:11):
I like black.
Like the evening gown black.
But I will not wear it all thetime.
No, I want colors
francene (13:16):
for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Me too.
Me too.
Um, well, hey, thank you so muchfor taking time to talk with me,
especially if your mom's intown.
Um, I'm also really lookingforward to Brun.
And catching
Runchi (13:29):
up.
It's a fashionable projectcourse.
So we try, we're trying tothink.
Me and my friend Mika will alsobe joining.
Yes.
So we are like, maybe we'll dofloral sorrys.
Maybe we'll do dresses.
She's like, let's do sorry.
At Butler house.
Oh my
francene (13:41):
God.
I love it.
I love it.
I cannot wait.
Um, so hey, welcome to RealBeauty.
Um, so I kick off every singlepodcast asking each guest, what
does beauty mean to
Runchi (13:55):
you?
Ooh, it's a good question.
Um, beauty to me, honestly, Iknow the cliche answers.
Inside.
Inside, of course, I have moreand more.
As you age, progress, mature inlife.
You do realize that, uh, beautyto me definitely is staying
(14:16):
healthy mentally and physic.
Yeah, because I, I did the crazyworkaholic situation I was in
and I was, I had the mostexpensive, not buying, but
getting it from whoever.
I had expensive clothes, but Iwas not feeling good.
You know, you cannot slap a TomFord on your, or, you know,
(14:37):
Chanel if you are not feelinggood.
Yeah.
And that's the number one rule.
And you can wear a target dressand look million dollars,
million bucks, uh, if you arereally feeling healthy.
And the size is not really neverimportant for me.
But yes, you know, you know yourheight, you know your weight,
you know, you know what'shealthy for you.
(14:59):
All that is extremely, extremelyimportant.
francene (15:02):
Yeah, I, I agree.
It's how you feel inside andhaving that confidence, cuz it's
so true.
You could wear the best dressever.
If you don't feel good.
Then I'm always conscious, I'malways, you know, kind of
covering my stomach if I don'tfeel good.
And then on other occasions I'mlike, Hey, Yeah,
Runchi (15:22):
no, and it's, I agree.
It's very true because I haveseen it again in the social
scene where I am mm-hmm.
uh, where everyone is, everyoneis in my situation, definitely I
feel way richer than me.
You know, they all have so muchmore wealth.
And my dad taught me one thingvery, at a very, very young age
(15:45):
that when you walk in a room,there'll always be someone
prettier, skinnier, andwealthier than you.
Yeah.
And you could never, you willnever be able to win with that
mindset if you're thinking ofupping them.
Because there will always besomeone like you cannot.
Yeah.
You know, bill Gates was, wasthe top one, and then there's
someone else will top him.
(16:05):
So, but, you know, at the sametime, but if you, you go and
walk in in your room as withyour confidence and what you can
offer.
francene (16:12):
Yeah.
Oh my God, I love that.
That's so true.
Um, so again, after reading yourawesome Bayou, um, bio, so you
started off, um, in journalism.
So you were a journalistreporter for Crime Beat, um, in
the Times of India, and you wereonly 20 and you covered
(16:37):
incredible stories and, andsubjects like se sex
trafficking, um, politicalcorruption scandals.
So how did you get into that?
Did you always want to be awriter?
Runchi (16:50):
So I grew up in India.
I came to the United States atthe age 23, 24.
Okay.
Okay.
And I was always very like, youknow, I was in seventh grade
when I kind of raised my hand.
You know, those teachers ask youthose questions, what do you
wanna be?
Mm-hmm.
And I always loved fashion.
This was just me as a firstgrader.
Mm-hmm.
I used to pull, you know, as akid, I used to pull my outfits
(17:13):
together and my mom was sofrustrated with me.
She's like, I can't wait for theuniform to start Cause this girl
drives me nuts.
And you, it's so funny.
That little girl in me, I havenot changed.
Oh, I love that.
I'm just grown.
But I am that same.
And I, even now, I look atmyself, I still remember the
same girls would get puttingherself ready for kindergarten,
(17:36):
That's awesome.
So the nice dress and all ofthat, But what she, what
happened was, I always likedfashion.
Uh, there's a very serious sidein me.
Like, it's so funny.
It's like in some part whenpeople see my social media, I
come across as a very like, youknow, passion and, which is
true, that's one facet of me,but I'm a very deep
(17:57):
philosophical over not aoverthinker spiritual person.
I love to talk about what is themeaning and you know, why are we
doing what we are doing andthings like deeper
conversations.
Yeah.
And this is just not today.
Even when I was in fifth, sixthgrade, I used to ask my mom,
growing up in India, I used tosee my peers not getting
(18:17):
bothered about us few things asin India, even though education
was fine for girls and common,you know, it's like we all girls
in middle, middle class or uppermiddle class, we all were
getting education.
But what changed in me was athought I would go to these
Indian weddings.
Hmm.
And.
It was like growing up in themid in, in the eighties, I would
(18:39):
see, I remember still like itwas 89, 88 or whatever year it
was.
And I was like, you know what?
And I went to the best school.
My dad was paying so much moneyfor that private school, and I
was looking at the, like, thesituation of, in the wedding,
the boys' family was like, youknow, so superior and the girl's
family.
And the girl was like, all itkind of, I came back asking 20
(19:03):
questions to my mom, ma I, and Iremember having that Lord Buddha
moment in me that, what is thepoint?
Yeah.
Why am I worth studying so hard?
Why are you asking me to dohomework?
Why are you asking me to studyBecause I told her, I said, if
this is gonna be my future inlike 10 years from now at 21,
22, whatever, um, what, what'sthe point?
(19:25):
Yeah.
Why, why are working?
So my mom would be like, I don'tknow, that's not true.
But I'm like, but I could seethat they were, they were
treated as lower class.
Like they were treated aslesser.
They were treated second classcitizens.
Mm-hmm.
Why?
Why?
She like, oh, these are justcustoms.
And really, I said, no, when Idon't understand.
Then I would read the newspaper.
Times of India, grew up readingthe Times of India.
(19:46):
I would get every morning thenewspaper thrown in the, you
know, the front yard.
Yeah.
And I read the newspaper and itwas filled with dowry, deads,
rape, abuse.
and it like, it just, I waslike, I was just functioning,
but I was not, I felt miserable.
Mm-hmm.
and the little girl in me was, Ithink that's what is good,
(20:09):
because I thought I could changethe world.
Yeah.
And I think it's a good feelingeven if you, no one, one person
can never do it, but it takesthat one person of course, to
try to always take that oneperson to feel that I will
change the world.
That even though if you can'tchange the world, you can change
your situation and that willchange your child, child
situation.
Hundred percent and so forth.
francene (20:30):
Yeah.
Runchi (20:31):
Yeah.
And that's the exact example.
And the, that's the motivationand that's what is my life
story.
I changed my story.
When I had arranged marriage, mydaughter is so proud of me and I
have a feeling she will not makethose kind of mistakes.
Sort of like, which I didn'tmake mistakes, but I got in a
situation where I had anarranged marriage.
(20:52):
Mm-hmm.
and I, things I didn't want tobe, you know, experiencing
happened to me.
I was not treated equally in themarriage.
I was considered, my voice wasnot heard.
I was considered, you know,unimportant only just to, uh,
um, give birth to a child.
Mm-hmm.
and my career was very importantand all of that.
(21:12):
And my, so I changed that.
I left my arranged marriagewith, uh, six month old baby in
my hand because she was thereason I left the marriage,
because I did not, I didn't feelrespected, I didn't feel loved.
I didn't, it didn't match any ofmy ethics and values.
That was the reason I left, andmy daughter is so proud of me
(21:36):
for doing that.
Why that I
francene (21:38):
can't even imagine how difficult that must
Runchi (21:40):
have been.
It was extremely difficult, butwhat would be very difficult
was, I feel, to stay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's my number one motto inlife is I wish we grew up more.
I wish I grew up even more withmy peers, grew up with this not
mentality that, uh, stay in themarriage for the sake of the
child.
No one should actually not stayin the marriage for the sake of
(22:01):
a child or children.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So that's my, yeah.
francene (22:06):
Yeah, I agree.
And how, um, so I guess withlike your peers and back then, I
can imagine from a societystandpoint, that must have also
been hard to It was very hard.
Runchi (22:18):
The wave.
Yeah.
They made me look like a badguy.
They made me look like the badperson.
They made me look like a badmom.
They made me look, uh, likeeverything I didn't from the
Indian community, it was like,uh, you know, what was I doing?
I all of that.
And going back to the questionof what made me start, so it was
literally reading thosenewspapers.
(22:38):
I was in seventh grade.
The teacher asked, what do youwanna do when you grow up?
And my, I raised my hand and Isaid, um, crime reporting.
And my thought process was, Iwant to write about dowry,
death's, abuse, and this wholemindset of stay in a marriage
and just kill your happiness.
(22:59):
Mm.
I'm a big believer of marriage.
I'm a big believer of love.
I am.
I'm one of the most hopelessromantic person on this planet,
but I am not a believer in abuseand staying in any abusive
relationship, but not just notmarriage, whether even in a
family, parents or siblings.
I feel, uh, it's just to methat's not love.
francene (23:20):
Yeah, I agree.
Yeah.
And especially if you're nothappy.
Yeah.
I think that's such a keymessage.
You know, happiness iseverything.
So how do you ensure that youcreate an environment that
allows you to be happy,especially if you have kids,
Runchi (23:35):
you know?
Exactly.
Yeah.
It's very Cause they'rewatching.
Yeah.
The most everything they learnis not, not so much from school
that we are, the parents are thefirst is what we teach.
Yeah.
And to some extent, I feel Itook a sort of abuse or
whatever, even though it wassuch a feisty journalist in me,
but somewhere deep grained waslike, I guess we need to
(23:58):
tolerate this.
Yeah.
Didn't you shake yourself fromthat dream that No, you don't
need to.
And do
francene (24:04):
you feel it's like the world's changed since then with
the outlook on marriage andensuring that, again, you get
yourself out of that abusivemarriage.
Um, do you feel like there's alot more support than it was
back then India?
Or?
(24:25):
Both because I guess you haveboth.
Um, yeah, I have.
Runchi (24:29):
Right.
3 22 and you know, it's likeinteresting.
Yeah.
Um, you know, uh, veryinteresting.
I still feel people are makingchanges.
And there's a lot of stigmas formen too, you know?
Mm-hmm.
like, uh, they being in abusiverelationships, men also
experience extremely abusiverelationships, financial abuse
(24:51):
from their spouses, theexperience.
Yeah.
Um, of course the physical abuseis typically they thought
processes that, that only womengo through, which is not true.
Right.
Men go through a lot of abuse aswell, and women actually have
way more support that way.
They can cry, they can, uh,typically they will be getting
more support than a man willget.
(25:12):
Mm-hmm.
and I have personally seen inmy, in my association with a lot
of, you know, whoever my friendsor boyfriend that I, they have
talked about or have not justtalked about a relationship they
were in.
I see how they deal with theexes even now.
Yeah.
That is how there's verbalabuse.
Um, and these things, women, weactually talk so openly.
(25:35):
We say, oh my god, red flag, hesaid this and she said that.
but men don't say it.
For example, I know a guy whoseex still calls him fat, ugly and
short.
Oh my gosh.
And to me, and they brush itoff.
We, we take it like we, but tome that's abuse.
And can, if you can imagine thisis ha this he, she says, when
(25:57):
they are not together, I canonly imagine when they were
together what level of emotionalabuse she must have done.
So having said that, but I stillhear a comment, which makes me
believe that has the societychanged as in, oh my god, we
have been together for 35 years.
(26:17):
Mm-hmm.
like I feel this is not a raceabout completing so many years.
Yeah.
But a journey of happiness.
Yes, that's what it should be.
But I do feel it is changing.
Good.
Uh, divorces are normalizing.
I am not, again, I've hate tosay it cause I, I don't be, when
you go in a relationship, you donot think of a splitting.
(26:39):
You know, you never think ofthat.
Of course.
Always think of, you know, arelationship being, you know,
forever.
But if you think about it,nothing in life, if we go with
the mindset of nothing isforever.
It's a good mindset.
Yeah.
It, because nothing is forever.
Whether our bodies, ourchildhood, our in the weather,
(27:00):
nothing is created forever.
India has come a long way, in myopinion.
Um, it has to still go a longway.
Mm-hmm.
because it's very, it's verydivor diverse and very intercom
complex.
India, in one hand, youspecifically, who is in the oil
and gas, you know?
Mm-hmm.
is the most, they produce themost educated men and women.
(27:22):
Oh yeah.
Literacy rate is really high.
Women are very educated.
There.
But the society mindset when itcomes to marriage, they still
talk about it is leaving as ifthe, the mindset is, if it's not
that bad, what's the reason?
Does he beat you?
Yeah.
Does he
francene (27:40):
knock on, does he, yeah.
Like there needs to be somethingmore.
Runchi (27:43):
Yeah, yeah.
So in my case, like I was luckyto have something more, so I was
like, oh, even then, justbecause he has a good job and he
was not someone who would comeacross as like, he's, he didn't
hit me or anything.
I'm like, okay, so can you workit out?
No.
You're like,
francene (28:00):
no, I don't want to.
No.
Yeah.
So,
Runchi (28:03):
um, I think it's coming.
Change is coming slowly andchange is never easy, but that's
when you have one.
The present generation have theway we talk to our children.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We need to talk more openly and,okay.
The reason I feel change iscoming and has come is because
of those stories and those, um,Disney stories that have been
(28:26):
produced.
Yeah.
That's the number one.
When we watch the, you know,where it's in Canto was loving.
Can I have been watching with myboyfriend's kids, all these
stories and movies?
Yeah.
And I watch and see.
I was talking to him and I said,oh my God, I grew up with
Cinderella and Prince Charming.
Every end of the mo story therewas a Prince Charming with a
shoe to save the day, or aladder climbing up and saving
(28:51):
me.
And, you know, you know, it'singrained in us.
It's ingrained me.
It's slowly changing, but it's,it's ingrained that the man will
give you something nice.
Only then you're valued.
Oh my God, a hundred percent.
and people, women still ask, ohmy God, what did he do for you
on that day?
Yeah.
What did he buy for you?
Because that is valued now withthese movies, I feel they're
(29:15):
talking about feelings,emotions, they're not making
stories, which are just, boy,girl, boy loves girl, and you
know, and then they livedhappily ever after.
They're, they're touching morereal topics.
Yeah, I
francene (29:27):
agree.
And more equalness with betweenmen and women too.
Yes.
Yeah.
More groups.
Yeah.
Um, because I even noticed thatwhen we had Luna and I went back
to work after three months, andthen I started going on business
trips at five months.
I went to Alaska, Canada.
And I remember the initialreaction from my girlfriends
(29:47):
was, Well, where's Luna gonnago?
I was like, well, she has afather at home, What do you
mean?
And they're like, is your momgonna come over and help?
I'm like, no, why would that bethe initial reaction?
But yet my husband travels andhas continued to travel.
No one ever questions.
Will Luna be okay?
Runchi (30:08):
No.
It just so funny, it's so funny,it's so annoying.
I say this all the time, I willgo to the gala and the first
question they would ask me, sowhere's Erica Uh, my daughter's
name?
Yeah.
I'm like, uh, with her dad?
Yeah.
Oh wow.
And
francene (30:24):
in my case, they, they're what a, what a great
Runchi (30:25):
guy.
Cause we're not together.
So they would be like, oh wow.
So you're so lucky that at leasthe watches his.
Oh my God.
When you're out
francene (30:33):
and about.
I know.
I can't, oh my God, I can't.
The amount of comments I getwith my social life and they're
like, you are so lucky.
Your husband's so supportive.
I'm like, um, we both have alife and we're both equal and
he's a founder
Runchi (30:45):
and God forbidden only for work.
We can also go for a little bitof fun too, you know?
I know,
francene (30:50):
I know.
I know.
Heaven, him forbid.
Runchi (30:54):
I mean, and I understand, but no one ever has.
I have in the social scene aclassic example, I've seen men,
single dads walk in and they'renever been asked.
Yeah, of course.
Where's your, but this is notupon the men.
This is upon the women.
Yeah.
Women ask these questions.
francene (31:11):
Oh, I agree.
It's always women.
To me, the guys never sayanything.
I've never had women being like,
Runchi (31:17):
ever ask me, where's your daughter?
Yeah.
How's your daughter?
They ask.
Yeah.
They've never asked.
Where's your daughter?
Yeah.
It has always been the women whoask me, Where's your daughter?
Oh my God, you are out every,and my job is every gala and
luncheon, I go, my God, you'reout every evening, And but the
(31:37):
way they say is like, I as ifI'm doing something wrong.
I know.
francene (31:41):
Yeah, I
Runchi (31:42):
know.
Yeah, it sucks.
And there's, right away thepraise is, oh my God, he, he's
at least.
I don't understand
francene (31:51):
that I don't understand either.
Like, I hope that that'ssomething that changes.
Runchi (31:56):
Yeah.
And that takes you suchprimitive thinking than you
think.
Oh, I know.
francene (32:00):
But again, to your point, I think it's ingrained in
us.
Yeah.
And it's only when you get thatreaction from people, like, I
would never have that reactionto someone because I've, I get
that reaction.
Yeah.
And I don't think that way, butit's how you make it a normal,
to your point with your kids,for them to be able to see it is
(32:23):
normal.
To have a life, to also have ajob and also do stuff with your,
you know, parents.
Yeah.
But separately, like, that'sokay.
It's okay for the mom to go out
Runchi (32:34):
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
I mean, it's just, it's justmind boggling and how, you know,
you see that, but you know, likeyou said, it, it's, these are
things that you have to, items.
And I used to go in the verybeginning, it was a lot when the
Indians, whether it's in theIndian social scene or
non-Indian, both places I've gotthat, but Indian eyes would get
(32:57):
way more and I didn't, it didn'tscare me.
The whole point was not to bescared, be confident, and keep
doing Yeah.
And you know, and, but I have myown take on equality with men
and women and different takes Ihave.
Um, but yeah, that is, uh, Ithink it's fairy tales and the.
(33:18):
It's, you know, gender roles.
Yeah.
Which is okay, you know, in ahouse a mom can give more tender
love and, you know, it'scomforting to have a, you know,
mother and a female in the houseand then running to my dad when
I was sick.
I get that.
That's different.
Yeah.
But these questions make nosense if we are all working this
(33:40):
day and age.
Yeah, I,
francene (33:42):
I agree.
Um, and, you know, looking atall of your achievements over
the years, and as you continueto do so now, I mean even just
from getting your own column,um, for the Indian Statesman
publication and then going on tocover NASA Columbia Shuttle
(34:03):
disaster in 2003, um, alsocovering stories for Fox A, B,
C.
ESPN used one of your stories ina documentary.
I mean, it is incredible whatyou have accomplished.
Um, so how have you foundnavigating through this
industry, starting off in India,moving then to the States as a
(34:28):
female?
And I know that you are a bigadvocate and we'll go on to
discuss this for L C A indiversity, but how have you
found it?
Runchi (34:39):
Um, being female was not very challenging, uh, because
my, this community has beenextremely supportive of, uh, you
know, Like the, the people, thecommunities have, they believe
this, first of all, the way itworked is they saw my work
because I, yeah.
My mission was not to be asocialite, you know, I'm not a
(35:01):
socialite.
I am a journalist.
I am writing, I've beeninterviewing people from
different walks of life.
That was my profession.
Trained journalist, which turnedinto writing columns.
Yeah.
Then more, um, having amagazine, which made me more of
a business side.
Yeah.
So still going and attendingwhatever.
They kept seeing the good workand they loved the stories, and
(35:25):
the way I connected people wasincredible.
Mm-hmm.
and what our magazine has beendoing from day one.
So the support was coming very,you know, good people were
supporting right away.
What was challenging was, Beingfar from family.
Yeah.
With a small baby and likedinner, toddler, then like, you
(35:46):
know, all these stages.
I had no family here.
Like at times, I really don'tknow.
I don't have even the answer totell what, how I did.
I don't know.
Like I don't know how I did it.
So how do I scramble throughthis?
I guess it may, I mean, withErica being so little, three,
four, when I started theMother's Day school in Houston,
she was in first grade.
(36:08):
Oh my gosh.
Wow.
Yeah.
And I have no mom here.
No, my, my parents in India.
My sister's in my one sister,she's in India.
Um, just pretty her to bed atnine, uh, eight 30, but then she
goes to sleep, then I take offmy computer, then I start
writing stories and when she'sat school, then come meetings,
doing all that, coming home atthree 30.
(36:30):
Then after school program kindof helped me get a little bit
more time.
I What time with that?
Yeah.
Things like that.
What was very challenging.
I will say was the subtle, and Idon't that again, I am very
proud because there is no one inthe social scene as, as a
character or a person as me fortwo reasons.
(36:52):
Mm-hmm.
number one, I was not born andraised here.
Indian.
Mm-hmm.
So the ones who make it in themainstream community, most
likely as a gala scene coveringor attending, uh, either with a
backing of a rich parents Uhhuh,or they're married to very
wealthy husbands, or theythemselves like, you know,
doctors, engineers, or whatever.
(37:13):
Mm-hmm.
but they're also married to verywealthy people.
Then they get a foot in the doorto attend, invited, or cover or
not cover, attend the big galasand events, opera, whatever.
In my case, I was.
on top of it, I'm a brown girlwho came from India.
(37:34):
Mm-hmm.
who didn't have the Americanaccent, who was not born and
raised here.
Yeah.
There would be a huge support,big corporate supports.
But there's a subtle, uh,there's a subtle racism is
there, which is very, verysubtle.
But over time I have seen it.
Like they will be like, oh yeah,yeah, we will, we would love to,
(37:56):
but there will not be any seatfor you.
You know what I mean?
There will be some subtlemm-hmm.
I have noticed it in the, in themainstream, like having my
magazine get in opera ball,having my magazine, get in
ballet.
Even though my, some of mycaliber, what we've covered for
many years.
I covered the, um, when I was,this, this was way back in 2005.
(38:18):
I was what, 25?
I was 26 years old, 25, 26 yearsold.
And I covered, uh, the, uh, youknow, um, the Oscar z Brisky,
she got the best documentary forOscar.
Yeah.
I chased her down to do aninterview.
Oh my God, that's amazing.
With that kind of Calibanjournalism I have to talk to,
(38:41):
they will invite the HoustonChronicle, because Houston
Chronicle has a backing of thename.
Mm-hmm.
But, but they're journalistbecause it's just because of the
o o of the paper city orwhichever.
But they ha I have to, I have totell myself over and over, over
again who I am.
Yeah.
But then also I'm Indian.
So they're like, oh, you know,oh, so they will either pile me
(39:03):
with the Indian group ofmagazine.
It's interesting, it's subtle,but I don't give up easily.
I fight and I took my magazinesingle-handedly in the
mainstream forefront, and at thesame time, amazing amount of
supporters.
I cannot thank some bigcorporate people who don't care
(39:24):
what color of skin is.
And that's what Houston makesAmazing though.
Yeah.
I, I mean, I'm so support,thankful for the, uh, mainstream
media, a, b, C 13, K P R C, Fox26.
They have been my biggestsupporters.
They've loved me, they loved me,and so forth.
And, um, yeah.
But there is, it's, it was verytough, very tough without a
(39:48):
wealthy daddy or a wealthyhusband Oh, god, yeah.
In the name of, you know, theJohnsons or the, you know, yeah.
Being able to get an invitation.
but I did it all with my worth,with my work.
So God, that's so incredible.
I'm very part of that.
Like I, I didn't have to use arich man to take, hold my hand
(40:10):
and take me to the gala.
Yeah.
I took myself with my work I gotin invited for.
That's so, that's
francene (40:17):
so amazing.
Um, so do you find, I mean, thisis just my viewpoint, so moving
from the UK to Houston?
No, from India.
Oh.
So I am, I'm from Oh, from, yes.
Yeah.
From Oh, you grew from, from uk.
Yeah.
It's right here.
Yes.
And I found from moving fromthere to here, there's a lot
(40:40):
more opportunities in the us.
if you're willing to go getthem, and if you're willing to
be persistent and you know,network.
But I found that to me from aprofessional standpoint, there's
a lot more here.
Um, do you think the same sincemoving from India over here, if
(41:00):
you had continued your journeyover in India?
Runchi (41:03):
Oh no.
I would not.
I love, uh, my roots.
I am very proud of, uh, uh, myculture, my clothes, my food,
all of that.
Yeah.
But I a hundred percent agreewith you.
Yeah.
Um, I've never lived in the uk,uh, but I can assure that and
(41:25):
people will be like, oh, butyou've not lived there.
Well, maybe.
But I can assure that whatHouston, and even for that
matter, what America, you nailedit is absolutely true.
People in the United States arethe best.
More than anywhere in the world.
Yeah.
And they are, they are willingto applaud.
(41:48):
Yes, yes.
They're not pretentious.
We are not snobs.
They are, they are like, theyare so welcoming of other
communities.
No other country.
Yeah.
I mean in the big, I have thesupport of the second generation
of Indian Americans, mindIndian.
I do not, I am not scared to saythis.
(42:10):
I have the support of the secondgeneration Indian Americans for
my magazine and my brand or mywork.
Not the first generation ofIndian Americans who I actually
served way more.
Not one person came forward tosupport me financially or.
They're in their little groupand you know, if I have a
(42:32):
husband, a doctor, husband,maybe they will look at me, but
they are great on my face.
They love me.
I'm not gonna say that, but thesupport I get is from the second
generation of Indian Americanpeople.
Yeah.
The first generation is, youknow, they are doing their own
thing and they, they are, theylove to show America what
(42:55):
they've done.
Uh, but sadly they're very, um,concentrated and they will help
a few within their peers.
And to some extent, I feel Icome as an outsider to them
because I don't follow theirtrend of, you know, merit and,
you know, in that sense.
Yeah.
Or whatever that means.
(43:15):
And, uh, India.
I've never worked there.
I have, I might have been 23when I left, but, uh, I feel
like a baby there.
So I don't know.
And I don't even know now whatit'd be like for me, but I would
never choose any other countryand UK at the same matter.
I don't think so.
I've heard from my, my otherfriends and uh, people that the
(43:37):
way I see America and Houstonespecially Yeah.
You know, is generous.
Not just with, I'm not talkingabout financial generosity with
their, with their openness.
Yeah, I agree To
francene (43:49):
embrace.
Yeah.
Yes.
Yeah, I agree.
And so many different cultureshere, which is great.
And this is what I love aboutliving in Houston.
Hey, welcome back to real beautywith Ft.
Season six.
And this is episode five.
I'm currently getting organized.
It is Sunday night.
I'm doing all the fun chores,such as changing the bad sheets
during the washing.
All that other fun stuff that wetypically do on a Sunday to
(00:24):
prepare for the week ahead.
And.
This afternoon, I went to one ofmy favorite places in old town
spring.
It's called T cattle cafe.
And they literally do the besthigh tea.
It's I really try and go asoften as I can.
Cause I miss gongs.
(00:45):
Clotted cream and fresh jam fromthe UK.
Of course.
So anyway, after we had.
Hi T we were celebrating mygirlfriends.
Birthday.
Me and Luna rose decided to justwander around old town spring,
which if you haven't and youlive in the Houston area.
(01:06):
It is such a cute place.
Firstly, if you're British likeme, they have the British store.
So of course it makes me want tobuy.
Super overpriced products thatyou would pay like a core of the
price for at home, but it'sthose kind of homely comforts
that remind you of likechildhood or different memories.
(01:29):
Anyway.
We also went to a place called.
On a whim.
And.
Oh, my gosh, they have such cuteitems.
It's a mixture of, um, like theyhave jewelry.
They also have some like coreCesarea.
Boots shoes.
Um, and then they also have likereally cool clothing.
(01:51):
So of course.
And I'm sitting, looking at itright now.
Hence reminded me IM.
Firstly.
I am addicted to buying.
Any like jewelry that has snakeson it.
I don't know why I don'tparticularly want to look into
X.
I can't imagine any of the,like, I can't imagine it's going
to be positive, but anyway, Ijust love it.
(02:13):
And it's really difficult tofind.
I think it's probably becauseof.
I remember years ago whenBulgari came out with this
snake, like necklace and thatcollection, which is like
iconic.
Um, I guess I'm just alwaystrying to find like a cheap
dude.
Cause clearly I'll never buildforward Bokhari, but anyway, So.
(02:33):
They had two sets of.
Adorable like chic snakeearrings.
Of course I bought them.
And then they had.
Great jackets with like fringe,especially as we're coming up to
rodeo season in Houston.
So I purchased a denim jacketand the back of it has fringe,
(02:57):
but it's like DMT.
fringe.
Which I was like, oh my God,we're going extra.
So I double check with Luna.
I was like, do you think Ishould purchase this?
And of course she said, yes,mama.
I'll do it.
So now I'm like, we're clearly.
Going to be terrible influenceson one another, but anyway, Um,
it was a really fun.
(03:18):
Afternoon.
So highly, highly recommend.
Just go check out old townspraying.
They also have a really cool barcalled plain and level where
it's like great wine, greatatmosphere, and they have kind
of tap pass.
So, um, yeah, it's a cool kindof different local place and
(03:38):
that we certainly love going to.
What else has happened thisweek?
Well, I finally finished theaudio book version of spare.
So prince Harry's.
Um, and I can only imagine ifyou are so bear with me with my
podcasts and I'm about to do.
(03:59):
Uh, post tonight about it.
Um, you'll either.
Love this.
And I agree.
Or I find there's no,in-between, you're going to
instantly hate me and follow me.
That's fine.
It's your own province, but.
And, uh, thankfully.
One of my colleagues at work.
(04:20):
She started a book club for usto kind of talk about this,
which has been awesome.
So finally finished it thismorning.
And it was so good.
Like I appreciate, there'sdefinitely split opinions out
there.
I think this was him writing thebook as a fuck you to the press.
(04:41):
A little bit of kind of selftherapy for himself.
And also, I think it was moreclearly like a bit of a kind of
fuck you to your family that.
You can't continue to go silentin these circumstances.
So it's too long for me to.
(05:01):
Go into firstly, if you don'tknow the background about the
whole situation, um, But you'vebeen seeing in the press.
Um, and you're probablythinking.
Oh, my gosh.
Why is her life?
So shit.
Why are they complaining?
I thought they didn't want to bein the press.
(05:22):
And now they're in the press andnow they're doing the
documentary and they did thatinterview with Oprah on like,
How dare they speak against theRoyal family.
So I see all these headlines andspecifically journalists, such
as like piers Morgan, likeclearly have.
Not enough going on in theirlife that they have to fully
just spend.
(05:43):
A lot of dedicated time toattack individuals, which I find
is really sad.
But.
To me, what I find kind of mostconcerning just reading it is.
The press in the UKspecifically.
I'm like, God, it's so bad.
So bad.
(06:04):
And I feel we've been livinghere for.
Nearly nine years and don't getme wrong.
The press in the us.
I mean.
Um, the press globally is notideal, but Jesus.
I just looking back, like someof the articles that have been
written against Meghan Markleand prince Harry, I'm like, it's
actually appalling.
(06:26):
And for anyone who I've kind ofhad.
A little bit of a debate aboutI'm like, Oh, you need to do is
look back and think, imagine ifyou were in that situation or
that was you and your gangpeople messaged you or like funk
cover of like establishedmagazines saying.
Does gusting, racist, horriblethings.
(06:51):
Um, it just instantly makes methink of.
Um, Caroline flack who, if, youknow, especially my more
American listeners, Carline,flack was a TV present in the
UK.
And the UK press were justrelentless.
It was just constant.
(07:11):
And she ended up taking her ownlife and her mom tried to.
Um, do campaigns.
And there was a lot of stuff onInstagram and on the web,
because I mean it trended sayinglike, be kind right.
Um, like be kind to each otherand then literally within a
month, everything just goes backto normal guy.
(07:32):
And I think.
Oh, God.
Why are people so fucking mean?
So.
If you are of the opinion, thenyou think it's all bollix.
And do you think he just needsto kind of get over himself?
And so does she, and they justneed to kind of go back in their
home and stop speaking aboutlike their life.
I would highly recommend.
(07:53):
Just instead of just reading theheadlines and taking that.
Like face value.
Do some research, like look intoit.
And maybe take yourself out ofthat.
Like your own bubble and putyourself in someone else's shoes
and think, well, That must kindof sock.
And I think.
Again, regardless of like thedetails at the end of the day,
(08:16):
that was his family thatremained silent.
And I think that's really sadand I've deep as empathy for
anyone that doesn't get theright love and support from
their family.
Because it really is sad.
And for me, at least Harry istrying to stop that generational
cycle.
He's doing something about it.
(08:36):
And hopefully he will be a lotbetter.
Father compared to what he'sreceived, but anyway, I'm going
to get off my home.
And I will save this for my bootclub and Friday.
Um, and if you are still thething.
I promise.
It's going to be a greatepisode.
Um, I'm really, really excitedabout speaking to, um, Richie,
(08:57):
who is the editor publisher ofLCA Houston international
society news magazine.
And also the founder host ofinternational mother's day
surgery.
So, um, we had such an awesomeconversation, but anyway, I just
want to touch on just kind of mythoughts after finishing that
book.
And I'm so glad I dedicated timeto listen to.
(09:21):
Here, what he had to say.
Anyway enjoy and have a greatweek
francene (09:45):
How's it going?
Runchi (09:47):
Good as usual.
Very was a Today was not thatcrazy.
Just lining up with, uh, themillion things that I do.
francene (09:56):
Oh my gosh.
When I was reading your bio, Iwas like, there's so many
different directions I want to
Runchi (10:02):
go in I know.
I said, so is my day-to-daylife.
And my mom said, you're in townfrom India.
Oh wow.
After four years pandemic andall of that and just, it's been
four years and part of I know,of course we'd be jumping and
one of the most interesting partof my work is figuring out what
(10:24):
will I be wearing?
Yeah.
the entire week at least.
Yeah.
I mean, it's nice if you likefashion, which I do, but it's
exhausting.
francene (10:35):
Yeah.
It's a lot.
So do you lay everything out?
Runchi (10:40):
I, I definitely try.
Yeah.
And then whenever I don't try orI don't plan, I have to like the
variations of my event.
Like just before this I was on amessage with this one of my
friends and, you know, clientsand Bridge Klay, she's chairing
the, uh, evening in the parkMemorial Hermann, uh,
fundraiser.
Yeah.
She's a very, very, they have,she and her has been very big
(11:01):
donors and she's also a verygood friend of mine.
And I have been with mymagazine, been part of many
mainstream Houston events andthese are like from Opera Ball,
ballet Symphony, tiger BallSociety.
Then they, you know, hum Park.
I mean these are not somethingyou just cannot get up and go,
you know, Oh, for sure.
Although I've been one of thosepeople, I do not believe in
(11:23):
fashion being keeping up withthe Joneses.
I don't.
Because A, I cannot, because mycircle is, everyone's like, eh,
they're at least a millionaireSo I'm like, okay, you're like,
cannot compete.
But I'm very lucky that in aprofession I am in that I work
with a lot of fashion houses andI work with a lot of brands that
(11:45):
either sometimes be sponsors orthey just give me outfits.
Like Bulgur has given me likethe hundred$50 necklace to wear.
francene (11:54):
Oh my gosh.
You are living the dream.
Runchi (11:59):
That's like, that's amazing.
But I plan outfits
francene (12:02):
definitely.
I love it.
Well, you always look fabulous.
The more I see your Instagramand after meeting you in person,
you're a fabulous person.
Runchi (12:12):
I love your outfit of the day.
I think it's really nice.
I think everyone should do it.
People who are working, um,whoever don't like it, I always
say they don't have to see it,but I enjoy it.
I'm like, I like to see like, metoo.
It's, it keeps you cause I'mnosy.
It keeps you motivated to lookgood.
I feel it does important people,some might say it's showing off.
(12:32):
I don't see it that way becauseit's kind of fun.
Yeah.
Girls have always loved becausewomen have always loved to dress
up so,
francene (12:39):
I agree.
Plus I always feel it gives me abit more inspiration.
Mm-hmm.
to see what other people arewearing.
And I'm like, oh, that's a greatidea.
Let me copy it.
Yeah.
Let me see if
Runchi (12:50):
I can imagine.
Reina, I am of course a creatorof my own madness with, despite
my crazy schedule, I will comeup with these things like, oh my
God, I wanna buy this brightyellow color dress or something.
Yeah.
francene (13:05):
Yes.
I'm all about the color.
I try and avoid black.
I like it.
Yeah.
Runchi (13:11):
I like black.
Like the evening gown black.
But I will not wear it all thetime.
No, I want colors
francene (13:16):
for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Me too.
Me too.
Um, well, hey, thank you so muchfor taking time to talk with me,
especially if your mom's intown.
Um, I'm also really lookingforward to Brun.
And catching
Runchi (13:29):
up.
It's a fashionable projectcourse.
So we try, we're trying tothink.
Me and my friend Mika will alsobe joining.
Yes.
So we are like, maybe we'll dofloral sorrys.
Maybe we'll do dresses.
She's like, let's do sorry.
At Butler house.
Oh my
francene (13:41):
God.
I love it.
I love it.
I cannot wait.
Um, so hey, welcome to RealBeauty.
Um, so I kick off every singlepodcast asking each guest, what
does beauty mean to
Runchi (13:55):
you?
Ooh, it's a good question.
Um, beauty to me, honestly, Iknow the cliche answers.
Inside.
Inside, of course, I have moreand more.
As you age, progress, mature inlife.
You do realize that, uh, beautyto me definitely is staying
(14:16):
healthy mentally and physic.
Yeah, because I, I did the crazyworkaholic situation I was in
and I was, I had the mostexpensive, not buying, but
getting it from whoever.
I had expensive clothes, but Iwas not feeling good.
You know, you cannot slap a TomFord on your, or, you know,
(14:37):
Chanel if you are not feelinggood.
Yeah.
And that's the number one rule.
And you can wear a target dressand look million dollars,
million bucks, uh, if you arereally feeling healthy.
And the size is not really neverimportant for me.
But yes, you know, you know yourheight, you know your weight,
you know, you know what'shealthy for you.
(14:59):
All that is extremely, extremelyimportant.
francene (15:02):
Yeah, I, I agree.
It's how you feel inside andhaving that confidence, cuz it's
so true.
You could wear the best dressever.
If you don't feel good.
Then I'm always conscious, I'malways, you know, kind of
covering my stomach if I don'tfeel good.
And then on other occasions I'mlike, Hey, Yeah,
Runchi (15:22):
no, and it's, I agree.
It's very true because I haveseen it again in the social
scene where I am mm-hmm.
uh, where everyone is, everyoneis in my situation, definitely I
feel way richer than me.
You know, they all have so muchmore wealth.
And my dad taught me one thingvery, at a very, very young age
(15:45):
that when you walk in a room,there'll always be someone
prettier, skinnier, andwealthier than you.
Yeah.
And you could never, you willnever be able to win with that
mindset if you're thinking ofupping them.
Because there will always besomeone like you cannot.
Yeah.
You know, bill Gates was, wasthe top one, and then there's
someone else will top him.
(16:05):
So, but, you know, at the sametime, but if you, you go and
walk in in your room as withyour confidence and what you can
offer.
francene (16:12):
Yeah.
Oh my God, I love that.
That's so true.
Um, so again, after reading yourawesome Bayou, um, bio, so you
started off, um, in journalism.
So you were a journalistreporter for Crime Beat, um, in
the Times of India, and you wereonly 20 and you covered
(16:37):
incredible stories and, andsubjects like se sex
trafficking, um, politicalcorruption scandals.
So how did you get into that?
Did you always want to be awriter?
Runchi (16:50):
So I grew up in India.
I came to the United States atthe age 23, 24.
Okay.
Okay.
And I was always very like, youknow, I was in seventh grade
when I kind of raised my hand.
You know, those teachers ask youthose questions, what do you
wanna be?
Mm-hmm.
And I always loved fashion.
This was just me as a firstgrader.
Mm-hmm.
I used to pull, you know, as akid, I used to pull my outfits
(17:13):
together and my mom was sofrustrated with me.
She's like, I can't wait for theuniform to start Cause this girl
drives me nuts.
And you, it's so funny.
That little girl in me, I havenot changed.
Oh, I love that.
I'm just grown.
But I am that same.
And I, even now, I look atmyself, I still remember the
same girls would get puttingherself ready for kindergarten,
(17:36):
That's awesome.
So the nice dress and all ofthat, But what she, what
happened was, I always likedfashion.
Uh, there's a very serious sidein me.
Like, it's so funny.
It's like in some part whenpeople see my social media, I
come across as a very like, youknow, passion and, which is
true, that's one facet of me,but I'm a very deep
(17:57):
philosophical over not aoverthinker spiritual person.
I love to talk about what is themeaning and you know, why are we
doing what we are doing andthings like deeper
conversations.
Yeah.
And this is just not today.
Even when I was in fifth, sixthgrade, I used to ask my mom,
growing up in India, I used tosee my peers not getting
(18:17):
bothered about us few things asin India, even though education
was fine for girls and common,you know, it's like we all girls
in middle, middle class or uppermiddle class, we all were
getting education.
But what changed in me was athought I would go to these
Indian weddings.
Hmm.
And.
It was like growing up in themid in, in the eighties, I would
(18:39):
see, I remember still like itwas 89, 88 or whatever year it
was.
And I was like, you know what?
And I went to the best school.
My dad was paying so much moneyfor that private school, and I
was looking at the, like, thesituation of, in the wedding,
the boys' family was like, youknow, so superior and the girl's
family.
And the girl was like, all itkind of, I came back asking 20
(19:03):
questions to my mom, ma I, and Iremember having that Lord Buddha
moment in me that, what is thepoint?
Yeah.
Why am I worth studying so hard?
Why are you asking me to dohomework?
Why are you asking me to studyBecause I told her, I said, if
this is gonna be my future inlike 10 years from now at 21,
22, whatever, um, what, what'sthe point?
(19:25):
Yeah.
Why, why are working?
So my mom would be like, I don'tknow, that's not true.
But I'm like, but I could seethat they were, they were
treated as lower class.
Like they were treated aslesser.
They were treated second classcitizens.
Mm-hmm.
Why?
Why?
She like, oh, these are justcustoms.
And really, I said, no, when Idon't understand.
Then I would read the newspaper.
Times of India, grew up readingthe Times of India.
(19:46):
I would get every morning thenewspaper thrown in the, you
know, the front yard.
Yeah.
And I read the newspaper and itwas filled with dowry, deads,
rape, abuse.
and it like, it just, I waslike, I was just functioning,
but I was not, I felt miserable.
Mm-hmm.
and the little girl in me was, Ithink that's what is good,
(20:09):
because I thought I could changethe world.
Yeah.
And I think it's a good feelingeven if you, no one, one person
can never do it, but it takesthat one person of course, to
try to always take that oneperson to feel that I will
change the world.
That even though if you can'tchange the world, you can change
your situation and that willchange your child, child
situation.
Hundred percent and so forth.
francene (20:30):
Yeah.
Runchi (20:31):
Yeah.
And that's the exact example.
And the, that's the motivationand that's what is my life
story.
I changed my story.
When I had arranged marriage, mydaughter is so proud of me and I
have a feeling she will not makethose kind of mistakes.
Sort of like, which I didn'tmake mistakes, but I got in a
situation where I had anarranged marriage.
(20:52):
Mm-hmm.
and I, things I didn't want tobe, you know, experiencing
happened to me.
I was not treated equally in themarriage.
I was considered, my voice wasnot heard.
I was considered, you know,unimportant only just to, uh,
um, give birth to a child.
Mm-hmm.
and my career was very importantand all of that.
(21:12):
And my, so I changed that.
I left my arranged marriagewith, uh, six month old baby in
my hand because she was thereason I left the marriage,
because I did not, I didn't feelrespected, I didn't feel loved.
I didn't, it didn't match any ofmy ethics and values.
That was the reason I left, andmy daughter is so proud of me
(21:36):
for doing that.
Why that I
francene (21:38):
can't even imagine how difficult that must
Runchi (21:40):
have been.
It was extremely difficult, butwhat would be very difficult
was, I feel, to stay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's my number one motto inlife is I wish we grew up more.
I wish I grew up even more withmy peers, grew up with this not
mentality that, uh, stay in themarriage for the sake of the
child.
No one should actually not stayin the marriage for the sake of
(22:01):
a child or children.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So that's my, yeah.
francene (22:06):
Yeah, I agree.
And how, um, so I guess withlike your peers and back then, I
can imagine from a societystandpoint, that must have also
been hard to It was very hard.
Runchi (22:18):
The wave.
Yeah.
They made me look like a badguy.
They made me look like the badperson.
They made me look like a badmom.
They made me look, uh, likeeverything I didn't from the
Indian community, it was like,uh, you know, what was I doing?
I all of that.
And going back to the questionof what made me start, so it was
literally reading thosenewspapers.
(22:38):
I was in seventh grade.
The teacher asked, what do youwanna do when you grow up?
And my, I raised my hand and Isaid, um, crime reporting.
And my thought process was, Iwant to write about dowry,
death's, abuse, and this wholemindset of stay in a marriage
and just kill your happiness.
(22:59):
Mm.
I'm a big believer of marriage.
I'm a big believer of love.
I am.
I'm one of the most hopelessromantic person on this planet,
but I am not a believer in abuseand staying in any abusive
relationship, but not just notmarriage, whether even in a
family, parents or siblings.
I feel, uh, it's just to methat's not love.
francene (23:20):
Yeah, I agree.
Yeah.
And especially if you're nothappy.
Yeah.
I think that's such a keymessage.
You know, happiness iseverything.
So how do you ensure that youcreate an environment that
allows you to be happy,especially if you have kids,
Runchi (23:35):
you know?
Exactly.
Yeah.
It's very Cause they'rewatching.
Yeah.
The most everything they learnis not, not so much from school
that we are, the parents are thefirst is what we teach.
Yeah.
And to some extent, I feel Itook a sort of abuse or
whatever, even though it wassuch a feisty journalist in me,
but somewhere deep grained waslike, I guess we need to
(23:58):
tolerate this.
Yeah.
Didn't you shake yourself fromthat dream that No, you don't
need to.
And do
francene (24:04):
you feel it's like the world's changed since then with
the outlook on marriage andensuring that, again, you get
yourself out of that abusivemarriage.
Um, do you feel like there's alot more support than it was
back then India?
Or?
(24:25):
Both because I guess you haveboth.
Um, yeah, I have.
Runchi (24:29):
Right.
3 22 and you know, it's likeinteresting.
Yeah.
Um, you know, uh, veryinteresting.
I still feel people are makingchanges.
And there's a lot of stigmas formen too, you know?
Mm-hmm.
like, uh, they being in abusiverelationships, men also
experience extremely abusiverelationships, financial abuse
(24:51):
from their spouses, theexperience.
Yeah.
Um, of course the physical abuseis typically they thought
processes that, that only womengo through, which is not true.
Right.
Men go through a lot of abuse aswell, and women actually have
way more support that way.
They can cry, they can, uh,typically they will be getting
more support than a man willget.
(25:12):
Mm-hmm.
and I have personally seen inmy, in my association with a lot
of, you know, whoever my friendsor boyfriend that I, they have
talked about or have not justtalked about a relationship they
were in.
I see how they deal with theexes even now.
Yeah.
That is how there's verbalabuse.
Um, and these things, women, weactually talk so openly.
(25:35):
We say, oh my god, red flag, hesaid this and she said that.
but men don't say it.
For example, I know a guy whoseex still calls him fat, ugly and
short.
Oh my gosh.
And to me, and they brush itoff.
We, we take it like we, but tome that's abuse.
And can, if you can imagine thisis ha this he, she says, when
(25:57):
they are not together, I canonly imagine when they were
together what level of emotionalabuse she must have done.
So having said that, but I stillhear a comment, which makes me
believe that has the societychanged as in, oh my god, we
have been together for 35 years.
(26:17):
Mm-hmm.
like I feel this is not a raceabout completing so many years.
Yeah.
But a journey of happiness.
Yes, that's what it should be.
But I do feel it is changing.
Good.
Uh, divorces are normalizing.
I am not, again, I've hate tosay it cause I, I don't be, when
you go in a relationship, you donot think of a splitting.
(26:39):
You know, you never think ofthat.
Of course.
Always think of, you know, arelationship being, you know,
forever.
But if you think about it,nothing in life, if we go with
the mindset of nothing isforever.
It's a good mindset.
Yeah.
It, because nothing is forever.
Whether our bodies, ourchildhood, our in the weather,
(27:00):
nothing is created forever.
India has come a long way, in myopinion.
Um, it has to still go a longway.
Mm-hmm.
because it's very, it's verydivor diverse and very intercom
complex.
India, in one hand, youspecifically, who is in the oil
and gas, you know?
Mm-hmm.
is the most, they produce themost educated men and women.
(27:22):
Oh yeah.
Literacy rate is really high.
Women are very educated.
There.
But the society mindset when itcomes to marriage, they still
talk about it is leaving as ifthe, the mindset is, if it's not
that bad, what's the reason?
Does he beat you?
Yeah.
Does he
francene (27:40):
knock on, does he, yeah.
Like there needs to be somethingmore.
Runchi (27:43):
Yeah, yeah.
So in my case, like I was luckyto have something more, so I was
like, oh, even then, justbecause he has a good job and he
was not someone who would comeacross as like, he's, he didn't
hit me or anything.
I'm like, okay, so can you workit out?
No.
You're like,
francene (28:00):
no, I don't want to.
No.
Yeah.
So,
Runchi (28:03):
um, I think it's coming.
Change is coming slowly andchange is never easy, but that's
when you have one.
The present generation have theway we talk to our children.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We need to talk more openly and,okay.
The reason I feel change iscoming and has come is because
of those stories and those, um,Disney stories that have been
(28:26):
produced.
Yeah.
That's the number one.
When we watch the, you know,where it's in Canto was loving.
Can I have been watching with myboyfriend's kids, all these
stories and movies?
Yeah.
And I watch and see.
I was talking to him and I said,oh my God, I grew up with
Cinderella and Prince Charming.
Every end of the mo story therewas a Prince Charming with a
shoe to save the day, or aladder climbing up and saving
(28:51):
me.
And, you know, you know, it'singrained in us.
It's ingrained me.
It's slowly changing, but it's,it's ingrained that the man will
give you something nice.
Only then you're valued.
Oh my God, a hundred percent.
and people, women still ask, ohmy God, what did he do for you
on that day?
Yeah.
What did he buy for you?
Because that is valued now withthese movies, I feel they're
(29:15):
talking about feelings,emotions, they're not making
stories, which are just, boy,girl, boy loves girl, and you
know, and then they livedhappily ever after.
They're, they're touching morereal topics.
Yeah, I
francene (29:27):
agree.
And more equalness with betweenmen and women too.
Yes.
Yeah.
More groups.
Yeah.
Um, because I even noticed thatwhen we had Luna and I went back
to work after three months, andthen I started going on business
trips at five months.
I went to Alaska, Canada.
And I remember the initialreaction from my girlfriends
(29:47):
was, Well, where's Luna gonnago?
I was like, well, she has afather at home, What do you
mean?
And they're like, is your momgonna come over and help?
I'm like, no, why would that bethe initial reaction?
But yet my husband travels andhas continued to travel.
No one ever questions.
Will Luna be okay?
Runchi (30:08):
No.
It just so funny, it's so funny,it's so annoying.
I say this all the time, I willgo to the gala and the first
question they would ask me, sowhere's Erica Uh, my daughter's
name?
Yeah.
I'm like, uh, with her dad?
Yeah.
Oh wow.
And
francene (30:24):
in my case, they, they're what a, what a great
Runchi (30:25):
guy.
Cause we're not together.
So they would be like, oh wow.
So you're so lucky that at leasthe watches his.
Oh my God.
When you're out
francene (30:33):
and about.
I know.
I can't, oh my God, I can't.
The amount of comments I getwith my social life and they're
like, you are so lucky.
Your husband's so supportive.
I'm like, um, we both have alife and we're both equal and
he's a founder
Runchi (30:45):
and God forbidden only for work.
We can also go for a little bitof fun too, you know?
I know,
francene (30:50):
I know.
I know.
Heaven, him forbid.
Runchi (30:54):
I mean, and I understand, but no one ever has.
I have in the social scene aclassic example, I've seen men,
single dads walk in and they'renever been asked.
Yeah, of course.
Where's your, but this is notupon the men.
This is upon the women.
Yeah.
Women ask these questions.
francene (31:11):
Oh, I agree.
It's always women.
To me, the guys never sayanything.
I've never had women being like,
Runchi (31:17):
ever ask me, where's your daughter?
Yeah.
How's your daughter?
They ask.
Yeah.
They've never asked.
Where's your daughter?
Yeah.
It has always been the women whoask me, Where's your daughter?
Oh my God, you are out every,and my job is every gala and
luncheon, I go, my God, you'reout every evening, And but the
(31:37):
way they say is like, I as ifI'm doing something wrong.
I know.
francene (31:41):
Yeah, I
Runchi (31:42):
know.
Yeah, it sucks.
And there's, right away thepraise is, oh my God, he, he's
at least.
I don't understand
francene (31:51):
that I don't understand either.
Like, I hope that that'ssomething that changes.
Runchi (31:56):
Yeah.
And that takes you suchprimitive thinking than you
think.
Oh, I know.
francene (32:00):
But again, to your point, I think it's ingrained in
us.
Yeah.
And it's only when you get thatreaction from people, like, I
would never have that reactionto someone because I've, I get
that reaction.
Yeah.
And I don't think that way, butit's how you make it a normal,
to your point with your kids,for them to be able to see it is
(32:23):
normal.
To have a life, to also have ajob and also do stuff with your,
you know, parents.
Yeah.
But separately, like, that'sokay.
It's okay for the mom to go out
Runchi (32:34):
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
I mean, it's just, it's justmind boggling and how, you know,
you see that, but you know, likeyou said, it, it's, these are
things that you have to, items.
And I used to go in the verybeginning, it was a lot when the
Indians, whether it's in theIndian social scene or
non-Indian, both places I've gotthat, but Indian eyes would get
(32:57):
way more and I didn't, it didn'tscare me.
The whole point was not to bescared, be confident, and keep
doing Yeah.
And you know, and, but I have myown take on equality with men
and women and different takes Ihave.
Um, but yeah, that is, uh, Ithink it's fairy tales and the.
(33:18):
It's, you know, gender roles.
Yeah.
Which is okay, you know, in ahouse a mom can give more tender
love and, you know, it'scomforting to have a, you know,
mother and a female in the houseand then running to my dad when
I was sick.
I get that.
That's different.
Yeah.
But these questions make nosense if we are all working this
(33:40):
day and age.
Yeah, I,
francene (33:42):
I agree.
Um, and, you know, looking atall of your achievements over
the years, and as you continueto do so now, I mean even just
from getting your own column,um, for the Indian Statesman
publication and then going on tocover NASA Columbia Shuttle
(34:03):
disaster in 2003, um, alsocovering stories for Fox A, B,
C.
ESPN used one of your stories ina documentary.
I mean, it is incredible whatyou have accomplished.
Um, so how have you foundnavigating through this
industry, starting off in India,moving then to the States as a
(34:28):
female?
And I know that you are a bigadvocate and we'll go on to
discuss this for L C A indiversity, but how have you
found it?
Runchi (34:39):
Um, being female was not very challenging, uh, because
my, this community has beenextremely supportive of, uh, you
know, Like the, the people, thecommunities have, they believe
this, first of all, the way itworked is they saw my work
because I, yeah.
My mission was not to be asocialite, you know, I'm not a
(35:01):
socialite.
I am a journalist.
I am writing, I've beeninterviewing people from
different walks of life.
That was my profession.
Trained journalist, which turnedinto writing columns.
Yeah.
Then more, um, having amagazine, which made me more of
a business side.
Yeah.
So still going and attendingwhatever.
They kept seeing the good workand they loved the stories, and
(35:25):
the way I connected people wasincredible.
Mm-hmm.
and what our magazine has beendoing from day one.
So the support was coming very,you know, good people were
supporting right away.
What was challenging was, Beingfar from family.
Yeah.
With a small baby and likedinner, toddler, then like, you
(35:46):
know, all these stages.
I had no family here.
Like at times, I really don'tknow.
I don't have even the answer totell what, how I did.
I don't know.
Like I don't know how I did it.
So how do I scramble throughthis?
I guess it may, I mean, withErica being so little, three,
four, when I started theMother's Day school in Houston,
she was in first grade.
(36:08):
Oh my gosh.
Wow.
Yeah.
And I have no mom here.
No, my, my parents in India.
My sister's in my one sister,she's in India.
Um, just pretty her to bed atnine, uh, eight 30, but then she
goes to sleep, then I take offmy computer, then I start
writing stories and when she'sat school, then come meetings,
doing all that, coming home atthree 30.
(36:30):
Then after school program kindof helped me get a little bit
more time.
I What time with that?
Yeah.
Things like that.
What was very challenging.
I will say was the subtle, and Idon't that again, I am very
proud because there is no one inthe social scene as, as a
character or a person as me fortwo reasons.
(36:52):
Mm-hmm.
number one, I was not born andraised here.
Indian.
Mm-hmm.
So the ones who make it in themainstream community, most
likely as a gala scene coveringor attending, uh, either with a
backing of a rich parents Uhhuh,or they're married to very
wealthy husbands, or theythemselves like, you know,
doctors, engineers, or whatever.
(37:13):
Mm-hmm.
but they're also married to verywealthy people.
Then they get a foot in the doorto attend, invited, or cover or
not cover, attend the big galasand events, opera, whatever.
In my case, I was.
on top of it, I'm a brown girlwho came from India.
(37:34):
Mm-hmm.
who didn't have the Americanaccent, who was not born and
raised here.
Yeah.
There would be a huge support,big corporate supports.
But there's a subtle, uh,there's a subtle racism is
there, which is very, verysubtle.
But over time I have seen it.
Like they will be like, oh yeah,yeah, we will, we would love to,
(37:56):
but there will not be any seatfor you.
You know what I mean?
There will be some subtlemm-hmm.
I have noticed it in the, in themainstream, like having my
magazine get in opera ball,having my magazine, get in
ballet.
Even though my, some of mycaliber, what we've covered for
many years.
I covered the, um, when I was,this, this was way back in 2005.
(38:18):
I was what, 25?
I was 26 years old, 25, 26 yearsold.
And I covered, uh, the, uh, youknow, um, the Oscar z Brisky,
she got the best documentary forOscar.
Yeah.
I chased her down to do aninterview.
Oh my God, that's amazing.
With that kind of Calibanjournalism I have to talk to,
(38:41):
they will invite the HoustonChronicle, because Houston
Chronicle has a backing of thename.
Mm-hmm.
But, but they're journalistbecause it's just because of the
o o of the paper city orwhichever.
But they ha I have to, I have totell myself over and over, over
again who I am.
Yeah.
But then also I'm Indian.
So they're like, oh, you know,oh, so they will either pile me
(39:03):
with the Indian group ofmagazine.
It's interesting, it's subtle,but I don't give up easily.
I fight and I took my magazinesingle-handedly in the
mainstream forefront, and at thesame time, amazing amount of
supporters.
I cannot thank some bigcorporate people who don't care
(39:24):
what color of skin is.
And that's what Houston makesAmazing though.
Yeah.
I, I mean, I'm so support,thankful for the, uh, mainstream
media, a, b, C 13, K P R C, Fox26.
They have been my biggestsupporters.
They've loved me, they loved me,and so forth.
And, um, yeah.
But there is, it's, it was verytough, very tough without a
(39:48):
wealthy daddy or a wealthyhusband Oh, god, yeah.
In the name of, you know, theJohnsons or the, you know, yeah.
Being able to get an invitation.
but I did it all with my worth,with my work.
So God, that's so incredible.
I'm very part of that.
Like I, I didn't have to use arich man to take, hold my hand
(40:10):
and take me to the gala.
Yeah.
I took myself with my work I gotin invited for.
That's so, that's
francene (40:17):
so amazing.
Um, so do you find, I mean, thisis just my viewpoint, so moving
from the UK to Houston?
No, from India.
Oh.
So I am, I'm from Oh, from, yes.
Yeah.
From Oh, you grew from, from uk.
Yeah.
It's right here.
Yes.
And I found from moving fromthere to here, there's a lot
(40:40):
more opportunities in the us.
if you're willing to go getthem, and if you're willing to
be persistent and you know,network.
But I found that to me from aprofessional standpoint, there's
a lot more here.
Um, do you think the same sincemoving from India over here, if
(41:00):
you had continued your journeyover in India?
Runchi (41:03):
Oh no.
I would not.
I love, uh, my roots.
I am very proud of, uh, uh, myculture, my clothes, my food,
all of that.
Yeah.
But I a hundred percent agreewith you.
Yeah.
Um, I've never lived in the uk,uh, but I can assure that and
(41:25):
people will be like, oh, butyou've not lived there.
Well, maybe.
But I can assure that whatHouston, and even for that
matter, what America, you nailedit is absolutely true.
People in the United States arethe best.
More than anywhere in the world.
Yeah.
And they are, they are willingto applaud.
(41:48):
Yes, yes.
They're not pretentious.
We are not snobs.
They are, they are like, theyare so welcoming of other
communities.
No other country.
Yeah.
I mean in the big, I have thesupport of the second generation
of Indian Americans, mindIndian.
I do not, I am not scared to saythis.
(42:10):
I have the support of the secondgeneration Indian Americans for
my magazine and my brand or mywork.
Not the first generation ofIndian Americans who I actually
served way more.
Not one person came forward tosupport me financially or.
They're in their little groupand you know, if I have a
(42:32):
husband, a doctor, husband,maybe they will look at me, but
they are great on my face.
They love me.
I'm not gonna say that, but thesupport I get is from the second
generation of Indian Americanpeople.
Yeah.
The first generation is, youknow, they are doing their own
thing and they, they are, theylove to show America what
(42:55):
they've done.
Uh, but sadly they're very, um,concentrated and they will help
a few within their peers.
And to some extent, I feel Icome as an outsider to them
because I don't follow theirtrend of, you know, merit and,
you know, in that sense.
Yeah.
Or whatever that means.
(43:15):
And, uh, India.
I've never worked there.
I have, I might have been 23when I left, but, uh, I feel
like a baby there.
So I don't know.
And I don't even know now whatit'd be like for me, but I would
never choose any other countryand UK at the same matter.
I don't think so.
I've heard from my, my otherfriends and uh, people that the
(43:37):
way I see America and Houstonespecially Yeah.
You know, is generous.
Not just with, I'm not talkingabout financial generosity with
their, with their openness.
Yeah, I agree To
francene (43:49):
embrace.
Yeah.
Yes.
Yeah, I agree.
And so many different cultureshere, which is great.
And this is what I love aboutliving in Houston.
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