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(00:03):
Hey, welcome to real beauty withFD.
This is episode six and it ispart two of my conversation with
Dr.
Michael Lennox, which I am superexcited about.
Especially as I mentioned lastweek, my mom is currently out
(00:24):
staying with us, and this is theepisode where we touch on her.
Um, specific dreams.
So, um, I know she willdefinitely be tuning in for this
one.
So, Hey Dorothy, hope you enjoythis episode.
We will dedicate it to you.
Um, So anyone that listened tolast week, How have you been
(00:48):
analyzing your dreams?
I know it's not just me.
That you know, Google's themstraight after or like Michael.
Referenced.
It's a good opportunity to kindof have a note, pad and pen next
to your bad, and either drawthem or however much you
remember.
Or just kind of write them down.
(01:09):
And I'm forever Googling tounderstand what my subconscious
is trying to tell me.
And.
I was telling my husband theother day.
I had this odd dream that Ibought a pair of sunglasses,
which were fake.
And I went to a dinner party.
And the host, I don't know whoit was.
(01:32):
They were giving out free, fake,like dollar sunglasses.
And they were basically the onesI was wearing.
And I told They were like real,you know, like branded.
Um, which is odd, right?
And trust me, I've so many ofthese dreams.
But they always have a fashionreference.
(01:56):
Um, I think I spoke about acouple of things with Michael
and I can't remember if Phil'son the podcast or, um, if it was
just when I was kind of goingback and forth with them.
Um, but I constantly have dreamsthat someone comes and steals my
clothes.
Clearly I have fashion.
Trust issues.
Um, But anyway, I'm reallylooking forward to this episode.
(02:21):
We have more coming in thefutures.
I hope you enjoy it.
Um, We recently came back froman awesome kid-free trip to new
Orleans this weekend for one ofher best friend's weddings.
And it was the best fun.
Um, but I feel like it's justbeen non-stop over the last,
(02:43):
like four to six weeks.
Um, So I'm looking forward tosome kind of tilt up time.
But, um, anyway, without furtherado, I'm not going to continue
to chat.
I will pass it straight over,um, or straight back to Michael.
Thanks for listening.
(03:17):
Yeah.
Do do, do you ever think, um,there's so I was talking to my
mom last night, um, and I wasjust telling her about this
interview and we're very.
I would describe herself as veryspiritual, like very much into
crystals, very much into signsand just being conscious.
Again, I've always been into mydreams and she was saying that,
(03:40):
um, like most of the time forme, I have different dreams.
But I also have the ability whenI go to sleep and I will go to
sleep like in a second, I'venever an issue with going to
sleep.
I will think of stuff.
And then I start dreaming kindof early on.
Um, so I can, I don't know.
I feel like in a way I can kindof set the scene before I go to
(04:00):
sleep.
But my mom was saying that shekeeps on having a reoccurring
dream that she's.
Roof.
And she gets, you know, she getsdragged down the roof, which I
was like, oh God, mom, this isterrifying.
Anyway, dragged down the roof,she's holding onto the gutters.
And then she feels.
This is, oh my God.
(04:20):
She was telling me last out.
I said, mom, I don't wanna knowthis.
She then lets go.
Because she feels comfortablethat as she lets go, it's
actually into nothing.
I was like, oh, I need to bringthis up.
Cause no one told me like that.
Um, And so things like that.
And I was trying to think aboutit.
(04:41):
I was like, okay, what does thatmean?
Cause it's like, you'recomfortable.
You're great.
You like go into the unknown.
And she's also gone through adivorce as of like four years
ago.
So a part of me was thinking,well, this is, you know, a new
chapter, you know, it's scary.
You're letting go, but yeah,sure.
Um, but yeah, yeah, but thatdream is wild much, much richer.
(05:02):
Now listen.
You and your mom have aconversation about the dream and
you posit yeah.
This idea that you've had anassociation with.
Oh, mom, you're getting adivorce.
That's a little bit likesurrendering to change.
Surrendering is a little bitlike letting go of the gutter
and letting you feel like that.
So Brava, brilliant dream work.
(05:23):
Right.
That's good dream work.
now I go to a much deeper placewith these images.
Yeah.
Right.
First of all, the house is the.
Yeah, right.
We live in our homes.
We identify with them, um, inwaking life.
And so, yeah, when, um, when.
you know, when we're dreaming ofany kind of building that we
(05:46):
might live in, we're in someconsideration about ourselves.
Okay.
The roof is the highest thought,the closest to the divine, the
most, you know, elevated abilityto perceive and conceive of
where we are in the, you know,existence is the roof.
Mm-hmm Rain gutters.
Mm-hmm like what you're holdingonto the rain gutters is what we
(06:09):
do with excess emotion.
It's like rain is water, water'semotion.
And the unconscious, when itcomes flooding down, we have
these structures called guttersthat channel our emotional.
Now and dreamland channel ouremotional outpourings in such a
way that we're protected that itgoes well, we don't damage
anything.
(06:30):
Right.
So we start with your mother'scurrent, current structure of
highest thought and emotionalwellbeing, but she's got a
surrender.
Into the next chapter, whateverthat is.
Right.
And she's, she drops intonothing which to me, especially
(06:50):
after all of that buildup aboutmy mom's into crystal, she's
into synchronicity, she's intothis.
She said, well, the void, thevoid, the nothing is the most
sacred state.
There is.
And it's terrifying to people.
In fact, I hear all the timefrom people who might have sort
of some natural affinities forenergetic experience, they
(07:12):
meditate or they go tomeditation mm-hmm and they feel
themselves leaving their bodiesa little bit.
And they're like, ah, go that's.
Scary.
And I'm like, are you kiddingme?
It's the most delicious thing inthe world to have those
experiences, but naturallypeople are frightened of the
void because it's terrifying.
We're so used to controllingthings through ideas or knowing.
(07:33):
Yeah.
Um, so surrendering to the voidthen to me is a deeply, deeply.
Spiritual moment of surrender.
It might also correlate with adaily waking life thing of a
divorce and a new life that shemust surrender to mm-hmm but the
dream is telling me that hersalvation isn't in the practical
(07:55):
world of three dimensional form,her salvation is in her higher
thoughts.
The way she has constructed heremotional life to be able to
take outpourings of emotion andflow them where they need to go
and then surrender to the voidor the greater spiritual arms
that are embracing her.
(08:16):
Wow.
Oh my gosh.
That was great.
We, so this afternoon, we, Ilive in Houston.
Um, And we went to one of likethe crystal stores, like close
to us and she got a couple ofthings and, um, I have a nearly
four year old, so I was like,okay, Luna, go pick whatever
crystal.
Um, you wanna get for Nana?
(08:38):
And I wish I knew the name ofit, but it was very.
Um, it's like an orange crystaland it's one specific for
change, kind of that newchapter.
I was reading it and I was like,no way you know, to pick up that
particular one.
Um, but that's see in my world,of course that's what happens,
(08:58):
cuz everything's connected.
Nothing really separate andeverything reflects everything
else.
Yeah.
So do you believe in fate?
Oh my God.
What a question do I believe infate?
Well, yes I do.
I do.
Mm-hmm but, but, but not as anexclusive way that consciousness
(09:20):
unfolds, right?
Meaning it's the, I think it'slike, We, we have experiences
that are the divine planunfolding, but not only do we
have free will within whateverit is, you know, we choose to,
to guide our lives by, um,there's also the fundamental
(09:42):
principles of chaos andrandomness.
Yeah.
You know what?
We don't even, we're barely in aplace of understanding chaos and
random events.
It wasn't even until the sixtiesand seventies that we developed,
the math that describes chaosand random events, fractals were
discovered, and that fractalsled to, you know, patterns.
And there were patterns infractals, which were computer
(10:04):
generated that seemed to matchthe patterns of.
You know, really in your lungsand tree branches and mountain
ranges like, oh my God, there'sthis random and chaotic way that
nature expresses itself.
And holy shit, there's math.
Mm-hmm that describes it.
Mm-hmm so if there's chaos andrandomness, that's 50% of the
equation.
(10:25):
Then if there is such a thingcalled fate, it has to be
married to, to chaos and random.
right.
So I think what that means isthere's fate and there's luck.
There's fate and there'shappenstance.
Yeah.
There's fate and there's random.
There's fate.
And there's the, the thing thatisn't like didn't happen because
(10:49):
you attracted it.
Yeah.
It just like manifestation.
It's like, you can manifestanything you want.
Is that true?
Not in my world.
You can't manifest something.
You don't feel like you deserve,you can't manifest something
that is not in your scope oftalent.
Yeah.
And you can't manifestsomething.
If the random and chaotic natureof the world interferes with a
(11:09):
desire, you have to manifestthat thing at that time.
Yeah.
So the answer, I guess, I mean,I didn't know, this was my
answer to your question is yes.
I believe in fate and I believethat it is 50% of the equation.
Mm-hmm not a hundred.
Yeah, that's a great, um,explanation.
It's a, it's a hard question,right?
I was just curious, um, on yourthoughts, but even I'm all about
(11:34):
trying to create positive energyaround me.
So to your point where you'reright, unless you believe you
deserve something, unless youbelieve, you know, in that
happiness, it's really hard.
Pull that in, and then you couldlink that up to, you know,
sometimes people say it's luckover, um, you know, fate and it
(11:58):
depends on the timing and youknow, how you feel in that
moment.
If you're more confident to asksomeone, you know, for that job
or whatever it is, ask someoneout.
Um, so I think sometimes for me,it's all.
Mentally how I feel in thatmoment.
You know, one of the ways Igrappled with this was all of
the people I knew who wanted tobe in the entertainment
(12:20):
industry.
Mm oh yeah.
God, a fascinating world.
Well, it, it is amazing to mehow many people thought that
their goodness was gonna lead totheir career?
Mm-hmm like they got thisspiritual idea.
That being loving is a good,good idea.
Cause it is yeah.
(12:41):
Healing, your trauma and beingless reactive in the world is a
great idea.
And there are people who Icounseled when I was younger,
you know, uh, um, because youknow, I, before I was a
professional at this, I wasdoing this for everyone in my
circle.
Right.
I was counseling.
Oh, I'm sure they loved it.
Yeah.
At least I've been, my motherwas my first client when I was
five, you know?
So, um, so.
(13:03):
That was a paradigm that Ibumped into so frequently with
people I knew who had this ideathat if they had the talent and
that they were good in theirhearts, that that was gonna lead
to the career.
And then you would look at allof the assholes would become
very successful and see thatgoodness has nothing to do with
it.
Yeah.
(13:23):
Nor does not talent.
Yeah.
It's so true.
Nor does talent and ability.
So in that case, there has to beluck.
There has to be fortune.
There has to be happenstance.
There has to be that you getchosen and you don't, and it
doesn't mean anything.
It's just that 50% of ourexperience in is in this
mysterious existence, includesrandomness and chaos.
(13:47):
Mm-hmm.
How, um, like, I know youmentioned you worked at Playboy.
How did you find that side ofthe industry?
Especially at that time?
Cause I think so much haschanged, you know, over the
years and, um, everything else,but I can imagine it was a
difficult industry to be a partof.
(14:09):
You know, I was, I was fortunatefrom the difficulty of the
injury to be on the studio side.
Mm.
And the studio side of theentertainment industry is a
corporate atmosphere.
Mm, okay.
Okay.
It's yeah, it's the world ofproduction and the making of
product.
Mm-hmm, that all of the reallyjuicy, but I'll tell you in the
(14:31):
entertainment.
Even on the corporate side, it'sthe one place where having a
personality disorder will notkeep you from having a job,
right?
you could be a borderlinepersonality disorder, rageful,
crazy person and run a studio orrun an agency, or be a how high
powered executive.
And so I certainly saw a littlebit of that.
(14:53):
What was interesting in, in thefour years at Playboy, which.
The last place I worked as thison, we was rising up.
Playboy was a wonderful place towork.
The, the atmosphere was warm andjoyful and conscious.
And, um, not at all.
What people from the outsidemight well, you, I granted there
(15:14):
was a, it was a party atmosphereand I got laid off at the moment
where Chicago said, Los Angelesis a party.
We need to stop the party.
And 20 people got laid off andeverything changed.
Um, But it, it was not a placeof nefarious, difficult
entertainment industry stuff,but you know what we were
selling.
(15:35):
Right, right, right, right.
Was soul eating to me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So that was interesting to be ina place that was ultimately
about sex and sexuality, whichwas fine with me cuz I, I, you
know, sex and sexuality is my,you know, jam.
Yeah.
Um, um, Personally it was that Icould, I literally could see my
(15:59):
soul being eaten away because Iwasn't serving.
Or, or I wasn't serving.
I understood.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Understood.
And I guess as well, um, youknow, it's, it's, it's hard to,
you know, have a passion.
You obviously have a gift and tobe able to move forward and
build up that career where, toyour point, you're helping
(16:21):
people, you're teaching.
You're also doing something thatyou're passionate about.
It's.
It's I think that's more rarethat you think so many people
are kind of stuck in jobs andyou know, you end up just
continuing down and you're like,what's your hobbies?
What's your passions.
And the amount of my friends arelike, oh, I don't really have
one.
You're like, yeah.
And I'm not, I'm not findingjoy.
(16:42):
Yes.
Find the joy come on.
That's life.
You know, one of the things thatwas true for me about this.
Journey the path that the desireto get on the path and create a
life, a career and a businesswhere I could do what I loved to
be remunerated well for it.
Yeah.
Um, took a really long time.
Yeah.
(17:02):
That and, um, the experience ofhaving the world say no, Over
and over again, but knowing myyes was interesting because it
was wildly painful, but it, itwas clear as a bell.
Like there wasn't when I hadpainful, I had a moment.
(17:26):
It was after the television showwas canceled and.
And I had several opportunitiescame up for being, because I was
so visible for four or fivemonths on TV.
Right?
So there was a conference in NewYork city with a bunch of other
spiritual leaders.
There was a workshop insomewhere and there was another
workshop in somewhere else.
And within the space of threeweeks, each one was canceled for
(17:48):
lack of registration.
Oh, wow.
And I was all I barely gottenover the televis should show me
and canceled and I'm like, it'sgonna take me two years to build
up my career.
And then bam.
In the first of those two years,it was like, Nope.
Nope, Nope.
Yeah.
That's hard.
It was.
But you wanna know something,there was never a moment where
(18:12):
that no.
Had any meaning for.
At all never good.
I was so clear of my yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That speaks to fate.
Yes.
Yes.
I could feel back then in 2004and five where I was barely
making a living and facing noafter no after no, I could feel
this life.
(18:34):
this life where, where I'msuccessful and abundant and
prosperous and, and loving, youknow, where my work has taken
me.
Um, and I could feel that Ithink a lot of people shrink
away from following their dreamsbecause the first no, or two,
yeah.
It's tells them that the worlddoesn't want what they have to
(18:55):
offer.
It's like, yeah, that's notreally accurate.
It's true.
Persistence is the key.
But it's having that confidenceas well to be like, no, I know
this is what I wanna do, or Iknow that this is what I'm good
at.
Um, so question switching it,um, a little bit.
So you obviously studiedastrology, you mentioned it at
(19:18):
the start of this call.
Um, and it was a full moon, butlast night.
Yeah.
Was it last?
Yeah.
Yesterday?
Yeah.
We're out for a walk and I waslike, damn like that.
Moon is incredible.
So tell me mm-hmm when there's afull moon, how.
Because I think again,sometimes, like we're not
conscious of, you know, howwe're feeling and we put it down
(19:40):
to, oh, yesterday was a busy dayor, you know, I'm stressed out
whatever it is, but I feel likethere's so much more in that
kinda cosmic raise of what'sgoing on in the universe and how
it affects us.
So, um, tell me more about it.
Ha well, first of all,energetically speaking, there is
an amplification of.
That we move through on amonthly basis.
(20:02):
And when the sun and the moonare in the same place, what we
called a new moon mm-hmm youknow, farmers used to plant
mm-hmm when the sun and the moonwere together.
But when you put thegravitational pull of these two
luminaries in the same place,they're yanking on the earth in
a very big way.
And they are pulling the waterof the earth downward.
(20:23):
Yep.
because the gravitational polescoming from one side, right.
Pens, tides change, right?
Yep.
And we are 70% water and we areexperiencing some pull down,
whatever that means.
Just words.
Right.
Mm-hmm words to describe a kindof energetic sense.
Yes.
(20:44):
Then as the lunar cycleprogresses and the moon crosses
the other side of the cosmos andnow the gravitational pull is
equal from both sides.
The water is not being pulleddown into the earth, but up into
the crops we have planted, whichis why we harvest in the full
moon.
Cuz all of the energy is up inthe wheat Berry.
(21:07):
Oh.
And so that same upwards wateryexpansion, we feel energetic.
While empirical studies mightnot show that certain events
happen more frequently during afull moon.
Talk to anybody works in, uh,um, a school or an emergency
(21:28):
room, you know, where they dayto day get to see the evidence
of sort of chaotic energy.
Then they will tell you thatit's always crazier in the full.
No, my, my word for this isamplified.
Okay.
Everything is amplified in afull moon mm-hmm right.
And so between this sort ofpolling energy at the new moon
(21:51):
and amplification of energy atthe full moon, we definitely
have an ability to say, oh, it'snot just that I had a crazy day
at work.
Mm-hmm that there's more goingon than meets the eye, but for
my money, The focus on new moonsand full moons is really much
more about a spiritual practice.
Okay.
Right.
Yeah.
That we plant seeds in new moonsand harvest in full moons than
(22:15):
the same thing to be said, canbe said about our conscious
attention on the desires that wehave to create.
Talking about manifestation.
Yes.
We manifest things by firstdeclaring our desire and our
intention to have them to createthem.
And that's what we do at everynew moon, because the energy of
(22:36):
the solar system is guiding usto do that.
And then when we're in the fullmoon, the, the culmination
moment.
That in farming looks like theharvest.
What happens when the harvest wetake the wheat Berry, but we
leave the CHF.
We don't want the CHF mm-hmm Andthen what happens with that
leave behind stuff is it can, itcan, um, decompensate and turn
(22:58):
into fertilizer for the nextcrop.
So at the full moon, we're doingthese two things.
We're lifting up that whichwe've created, and we're making
sure that we leave the.
Behind that doesn't serviceanymore.
And that shows up in full mooncelebration as gratitude and
release.
What am I grateful for?
(23:19):
What am I ready to release?
And then the signs in astrologythat the moon and the sun are in
can give some distinctions aboutwhat area of consciousness to
focus.
Right.
So the full moon that we're inor were in, you know, the other
day before we met today was incancer.
Mm-hmm cancer is the archetypeof the mother and the home and
(23:40):
the heart and family andintimacy and feelings and
tenderness and vulnerability.
And so these last couple ofdays, the full moon's gratitude
would be all the ways that youare practicing self care and,
and, and attending to thenurturing needs that you have,
because that's what the cancerarche.
Is all about, and then what therelease moment of this would be,
(24:02):
what, what gets in your way ofa, of, of sort of feeling more
whole complete and able to climbthe mountain of your ambitions,
where the sun is Capricorn, themountain that we climb up.
Yeah.
And so what we're letting go ofin a cancer moon is everything
about not taking care ofourselves, of not putting
ourselves first of runningaround the airplane, trying to
(24:23):
help everybody with their oxygenmask, but you haven't put yours
on yeah.
And so that's, that's the themearchetypally of the full moon
that we've just had.
And so as a spiritual practice,as a way of relating to this
existence, that we are a part ofhonoring the new moon in full
(24:43):
moon is natural because that'swhat the system is doing.
The system says our consciousand our unconscious is lining up
at the new moon.
And so it's a great time to bein both conscious awareness of
what you desire, but connectingto your unconscious where all
the manifestation juice happens.
And then two weeks later, we'rein this place of gratitude and
(25:04):
release.
And this is what our ancestorsdid, right?
Yeah.
Our first peoples.
Use the sun and seasons tocreate civilization because they
told you when to plant, when toreap, when to rest, when to move
mm-hmm and then the movement ofthe moon governed, the more sort
(25:25):
of inner communal experiences,um, and certain pagan rituals
developed over the years ofhonoring the P moon honoring the
full moon.
And so I like.
I respond to that as a way offeeling connected to the cycles
that we are already connectedto.
We might as well notice them andhonor them and work with them.
(25:47):
Oh, for sure.
I feel like I need to pay moreattention to, um, like the Fu
moon cycles.
Like I'm, so I'm a Scorpio andI'm obsessed with reading my
star sign.
I read it every week, everymonth.
Um, You know, I I'm very muchaware that you can read
something and connect it back ifyou want to.
(26:09):
Right.
Like you can say something andbe like, oh my God, that's so
me, but I'm very much my starsign.
The only thing I'm missing isthe jealousy part.
Um, but I get very possessiveover my friends, but, um, I am,
I feel all of that.
Like how we are kind of what ourmakeup is.
And I'm always very conscious tokind of keep aligned with the
(26:32):
weaknesses of my sign and.
Trying to use things or willmake me a little bit stronger,
but yeah, I think that'smarvelous.
I mean, that's part of the valueof astrology, even at that low
level of like, just beingcurious about your, about your
sunshine.
Yeah.
I'll tell you this.
I don't know your chart.
I've never looked at it, butI'll bet there's something in
(26:53):
there.
That allows you to more easilyconnect with, you know,
forgiveness and, and balance andharmony.
So that mitigates the, thepersonal sense of jealousy that
might typically be associatedwith the Scorpio archetype.
Yes.
Yeah.
So that's, that's the value of,of like knowing your whole
chart?
Yeah.
Um, because it's very, veryreflective of who you are.
(27:16):
Mm-hmm mm-hmm it really is.
One of the reasons I think Ibecame an astrologer on a more
existential level is that mybody is so sensitive to energy
that I'm constantly havingsensations in my body that I now
know are simply based on theenergetic movement.
(27:38):
Because I've had 25 years ofbeing able to look at right how
the planets are moving and howmy body is feeling.
So for the first 38 years of mylife, I had a myth about myself
that there was something wrongwith me that I was probably sick
all the time and that I wasgonna die, horrible death
because my father had been veryill as a man.
(27:58):
He had a, he had a disease.
It had common variable immunedeficiency disorder had a
terrible, had terrible health.
And I had these terriblesensations all the time where I
would feel like sick, exceptthat it's not sick.
It's like what?
I now call moon sick.
So I can have moments where Idon't feel good in my body, but
(28:19):
it's just energy.
And if I look at the astrologyand see what I think is causing
it, the moment it passes, thefeeling goes away.
So I was just misinterpretingthe sensations of my body for
the first 40 years and learninghow to read the contextual tool
that told me why my body wasfeeling a certain way.
Energetically, do you ever, um,feel different energy from
(28:43):
different people?
I speak about this a lot withsome of my girlfriends that, you
know, if you're around, I, Idon't know.
And I don't wanna say you getlike a bad feeling about people,
but you know, sometimes it'sjust, I don't, I, I don't even
know how to describe it.
It's like sometimes I'm drawn topeople and I feel great when I
walk away and, you know, yes,you could say, it's your
personality, you know, beauty,whatever.
(29:05):
But there are other people thatis.
I don't know.
You just get, I don't, I, Idunno how to describe it.
I feel like it's just energy,but, well, it is just energy and
I, I know for myself that I canbe say out at a gathering, I am
extremely extroverted and, um,pretty sunny.
In my personality, right?
(29:26):
So when I am in that state, Ilike everybody.
And, and it'll be reallyinteresting to me to like, be at
a table for example, and besitting next to somebody and be
very aware.
I don't want to talk to you.
Right.
Right, right.
Right.
And then other people of fact, IThanksgiving, it's like, you
know, someone on my left,someone on my right.
(29:48):
It was like, Ooh, very differentexperiences.
now I didn't look at theircharts, but I betcha.
If I did, I would see aconnection energy between the
two charts where I felt.
Yummy in the energeticconnection and just something
that would be like friction inthe other.
Yes.
Yeah.
Cause I'm sure that woman was apure, fairly wonderful woman.
She was certainly friends withthe people in the crowd and it
(30:10):
was a lovely crowd.
So she's unlikely to behorrible.
It just, wasn't an energeticmatch.
Yeah.
And astrology reflects that.
God, that's so interesting.
I love this subject.
Um, so I really want to bemindful, um, of your time.
So I will ask one more question.
(30:30):
That's good.
Um, and then we have like aquick fire around and, uh, I
promise I will let you get backto your, um, everyday life.
So I ask every guest.
Um, to be honest, the reason Istarted this podcast was, um,
looking at what beauty means topeople and not just, you know,
makeup or skincare, but likedeep down, what makes you happy?
(30:53):
Like what makes you passionateand really trying to encourage
those types of conversations.
So I will ask you the same.
What does beauty mean to you?
Well, What an interestingquestion.
I can just say what came up forme when you asked is I am
reminded of how profound sharedlaughter is.
(31:18):
Yeah.
Life is painful.
It is painful to be here.
It's painful to be in a body.
Um, and life is wildly joyful.
Mm-hmm And I think that when Ithink about it's funny, because
even just beauty as superficialthings, that's a disconnector
(31:41):
like, yes, beauty might bebeauty in that manner, but that
beauty is something that is muchmore about let's, you know,
admire that from afar.
Yes.
You don't actually get to ownthat.
You get to observe that andmaybe be moved by it.
Mm-hmm But when.
When people share a moment ofdepth and intensity that erupts
(32:03):
into laughter then connectionoccurs.
Yes mm-hmm and that, I thinkthat's, what's beautiful is
connection.
I love that.
That's a great, great answer.
Um, okay.
Quick, far round.
So say whatever comes into yourhead.
Um, and don't judge me for thesequestions.
uh, so favorite cocktail.
(32:25):
I don't drink, but it was anapple Martin.
Oh, great.
Great cocktail.
Um, who would play you in amovie?
Robert Downey, Jr.
Oh, I love him.
Oh my God.
I love him so much.
I get mistaken for him a lot.
I could see that.
Yeah.
I definitely could see that.
Um, most used emoji, uh, mostused.
(32:50):
Golly, why am I stopping onthis?
I have to check.
probably a kissy face or a.
Smile.
That's good.
Let's say smile's If you couldbe anyone for a day, who would
you be?
Oh my God.
I, I know.
Oh my God.
(33:10):
I, oh my God.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Who would I be?
Somebody who can do somethingphysically spectacular, like an
athlete.
Yeah.
I'm not gonna, I can't, I can't,I can't grab one for you
specifically, but that I wouldwanna have the experience of
someone who can move in theirbody in some profound, like a
diver or a gym, a gymnast.
Oh, Yo.
No, that would be amazing.
(33:31):
Yeah.
Even just to be flexible.
um, if you could, oh wait, wait,wait a dancer, a ballet dancer,
an incredibly gifted male balletdancer who can jump and be
fabulous.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
That'd be great.
Um, if you could relive one ofyour dreams over and over, but
won, it would definitely involvesinging.
(33:56):
I'm a singer.
This is probably one of the mostjoyful expressions that there is
in my body is to sing.
I love to sing.
Yeah.
Um, I don't, I know this is sortof a, I, I don't know how.
It's it's easy to say as asinger, this is not a lightning
round.
I'm totally fucking up yourlighting round going Downing
this.
(34:17):
But like, I think in the olddays, it might have been like a
moment where I was performingfor a lot of people and, you
know, being giving.
But, you know, I had anexperience about six months ago
where I was, I sing every dayand I have tracks that I work in
and I live in a place with lotsof great acoustics and far
neighbors.
And I had a moment recentlywhere I was in a prayerful
experience of singing, likeconnected to mother.
(34:40):
And it was so spectacular if Icould live that over and over
and over again, that'll be alittle bit like being in heaven.
Yeah.
Oh, I love that.
Um, okay.
Last one.
Um, what is your life motto orfavorite phrase that you live
by?
I slept and dreamed that lifewas joy.
I woke and found that life wasservice.
(35:03):
I served and found that serviceis joy.
Oh wow.
That's amazing to gory his taggory.
Who's an Indian Saint.
Oh my gosh.
That's the most profound ideathat runs.
Wow.
That's incredible.
Um, Hey, thank you so much.
Um, I really, really appreciate,it's been a great conversation.
(35:27):
I can't wait to listen to thisback.
I also, can't my mom delight mypleasure Lenox.
Yes, we, hopefully we will keepin touch, but yeah.
Hey, thank you so much for yourtime.
I really, really appreciate it.
It was really my pleasure.
Thank you so much.
Hey, welcome to real beauty withFD.
This is episode six and it ispart two of my conversation with
Dr.
Michael Lennox, which I am superexcited about.
Especially as I mentioned lastweek, my mom is currently out
(00:24):
staying with us, and this is theepisode where we touch on her.
Um, specific dreams.
So, um, I know she willdefinitely be tuning in for this
one.
So, Hey Dorothy, hope you enjoythis episode.
We will dedicate it to you.
Um, So anyone that listened tolast week, How have you been
(00:48):
analyzing your dreams?
I know it's not just me.
That you know, Google's themstraight after or like Michael.
Referenced.
It's a good opportunity to kindof have a note, pad and pen next
to your bad, and either drawthem or however much you
remember.
Or just kind of write them down.
(01:09):
And I'm forever Googling tounderstand what my subconscious
is trying to tell me.
And.
I was telling my husband theother day.
I had this odd dream that Ibought a pair of sunglasses,
which were fake.
And I went to a dinner party.
And the host, I don't know whoit was.
(01:32):
They were giving out free, fake,like dollar sunglasses.
And they were basically the onesI was wearing.
And I told They were like real,you know, like branded.
Um, which is odd, right?
And trust me, I've so many ofthese dreams.
But they always have a fashionreference.
(01:56):
Um, I think I spoke about acouple of things with Michael
and I can't remember if Phil'son the podcast or, um, if it was
just when I was kind of goingback and forth with them.
Um, but I constantly have dreamsthat someone comes and steals my
clothes.
Clearly I have fashion.
Trust issues.
Um, But anyway, I'm reallylooking forward to this episode.
(02:21):
We have more coming in thefutures.
I hope you enjoy it.
Um, We recently came back froman awesome kid-free trip to new
Orleans this weekend for one ofher best friend's weddings.
And it was the best fun.
Um, but I feel like it's justbeen non-stop over the last,
(02:43):
like four to six weeks.
Um, So I'm looking forward tosome kind of tilt up time.
But, um, anyway, without furtherado, I'm not going to continue
to chat.
I will pass it straight over,um, or straight back to Michael.
Thanks for listening.
(03:17):
Yeah.
Do do, do you ever think, um,there's so I was talking to my
mom last night, um, and I wasjust telling her about this
interview and we're very.
I would describe herself as veryspiritual, like very much into
crystals, very much into signsand just being conscious.
Again, I've always been into mydreams and she was saying that,
(03:40):
um, like most of the time forme, I have different dreams.
But I also have the ability whenI go to sleep and I will go to
sleep like in a second, I'venever an issue with going to
sleep.
I will think of stuff.
And then I start dreaming kindof early on.
Um, so I can, I don't know.
I feel like in a way I can kindof set the scene before I go to
(04:00):
sleep.
But my mom was saying that shekeeps on having a reoccurring
dream that she's.
Roof.
And she gets, you know, she getsdragged down the roof, which I
was like, oh God, mom, this isterrifying.
Anyway, dragged down the roof,she's holding onto the gutters.
And then she feels.
This is, oh my God.
(04:20):
She was telling me last out.
I said, mom, I don't wanna knowthis.
She then lets go.
Because she feels comfortablethat as she lets go, it's
actually into nothing.
I was like, oh, I need to bringthis up.
Cause no one told me like that.
Um, And so things like that.
And I was trying to think aboutit.
(04:41):
I was like, okay, what does thatmean?
Cause it's like, you'recomfortable.
You're great.
You like go into the unknown.
And she's also gone through adivorce as of like four years
ago.
So a part of me was thinking,well, this is, you know, a new
chapter, you know, it's scary.
You're letting go, but yeah,sure.
Um, but yeah, yeah, but thatdream is wild much, much richer.
(05:02):
Now listen.
You and your mom have aconversation about the dream and
you posit yeah.
This idea that you've had anassociation with.
Oh, mom, you're getting adivorce.
That's a little bit likesurrendering to change.
Surrendering is a little bitlike letting go of the gutter
and letting you feel like that.
So Brava, brilliant dream work.
(05:23):
Right.
That's good dream work.
now I go to a much deeper placewith these images.
Yeah.
Right.
First of all, the house is the.
Yeah, right.
We live in our homes.
We identify with them, um, inwaking life.
And so, yeah, when, um, when.
you know, when we're dreaming ofany kind of building that we
(05:46):
might live in, we're in someconsideration about ourselves.
Okay.
The roof is the highest thought,the closest to the divine, the
most, you know, elevated abilityto perceive and conceive of
where we are in the, you know,existence is the roof.
Mm-hmm Rain gutters.
Mm-hmm like what you're holdingonto the rain gutters is what we
(06:09):
do with excess emotion.
It's like rain is water, water'semotion.
And the unconscious, when itcomes flooding down, we have
these structures called guttersthat channel our emotional.
Now and dreamland channel ouremotional outpourings in such a
way that we're protected that itgoes well, we don't damage
anything.
(06:30):
Right.
So we start with your mother'scurrent, current structure of
highest thought and emotionalwellbeing, but she's got a
surrender.
Into the next chapter, whateverthat is.
Right.
And she's, she drops intonothing which to me, especially
(06:50):
after all of that buildup aboutmy mom's into crystal, she's
into synchronicity, she's intothis.
She said, well, the void, thevoid, the nothing is the most
sacred state.
There is.
And it's terrifying to people.
In fact, I hear all the timefrom people who might have sort
of some natural affinities forenergetic experience, they
(07:12):
meditate or they go tomeditation mm-hmm and they feel
themselves leaving their bodiesa little bit.
And they're like, ah, go that's.
Scary.
And I'm like, are you kiddingme?
It's the most delicious thing inthe world to have those
experiences, but naturallypeople are frightened of the
void because it's terrifying.
We're so used to controllingthings through ideas or knowing.
(07:33):
Yeah.
Um, so surrendering to the voidthen to me is a deeply, deeply.
Spiritual moment of surrender.
It might also correlate with adaily waking life thing of a
divorce and a new life that shemust surrender to mm-hmm but the
dream is telling me that hersalvation isn't in the practical
(07:55):
world of three dimensional form,her salvation is in her higher
thoughts.
The way she has constructed heremotional life to be able to
take outpourings of emotion andflow them where they need to go
and then surrender to the voidor the greater spiritual arms
that are embracing her.
(08:16):
Wow.
Oh my gosh.
That was great.
We, so this afternoon, we, Ilive in Houston.
Um, And we went to one of likethe crystal stores, like close
to us and she got a couple ofthings and, um, I have a nearly
four year old, so I was like,okay, Luna, go pick whatever
crystal.
Um, you wanna get for Nana?
(08:38):
And I wish I knew the name ofit, but it was very.
Um, it's like an orange crystaland it's one specific for
change, kind of that newchapter.
I was reading it and I was like,no way you know, to pick up that
particular one.
Um, but that's see in my world,of course that's what happens,
(08:58):
cuz everything's connected.
Nothing really separate andeverything reflects everything
else.
Yeah.
So do you believe in fate?
Oh my God.
What a question do I believe infate?
Well, yes I do.
I do.
Mm-hmm but, but, but not as anexclusive way that consciousness
(09:20):
unfolds, right?
Meaning it's the, I think it'slike, We, we have experiences
that are the divine planunfolding, but not only do we
have free will within whateverit is, you know, we choose to,
to guide our lives by, um,there's also the fundamental
(09:42):
principles of chaos andrandomness.
Yeah.
You know what?
We don't even, we're barely in aplace of understanding chaos and
random events.
It wasn't even until the sixtiesand seventies that we developed,
the math that describes chaosand random events, fractals were
discovered, and that fractalsled to, you know, patterns.
And there were patterns infractals, which were computer
(10:04):
generated that seemed to matchthe patterns of.
You know, really in your lungsand tree branches and mountain
ranges like, oh my God, there'sthis random and chaotic way that
nature expresses itself.
And holy shit, there's math.
Mm-hmm that describes it.
Mm-hmm so if there's chaos andrandomness, that's 50% of the
equation.
(10:25):
Then if there is such a thingcalled fate, it has to be
married to, to chaos and random.
right.
So I think what that means isthere's fate and there's luck.
There's fate and there'shappenstance.
Yeah.
There's fate and there's random.
There's fate.
And there's the, the thing thatisn't like didn't happen because
(10:49):
you attracted it.
Yeah.
It just like manifestation.
It's like, you can manifestanything you want.
Is that true?
Not in my world.
You can't manifest something.
You don't feel like you deserve,you can't manifest something
that is not in your scope oftalent.
Yeah.
And you can't manifestsomething.
If the random and chaotic natureof the world interferes with a
(11:09):
desire, you have to manifestthat thing at that time.
Yeah.
So the answer, I guess, I mean,I didn't know, this was my
answer to your question is yes.
I believe in fate and I believethat it is 50% of the equation.
Mm-hmm not a hundred.
Yeah, that's a great, um,explanation.
It's a, it's a hard question,right?
I was just curious, um, on yourthoughts, but even I'm all about
(11:34):
trying to create positive energyaround me.
So to your point where you'reright, unless you believe you
deserve something, unless youbelieve, you know, in that
happiness, it's really hard.
Pull that in, and then you couldlink that up to, you know,
sometimes people say it's luckover, um, you know, fate and it
(11:58):
depends on the timing and youknow, how you feel in that
moment.
If you're more confident to asksomeone, you know, for that job
or whatever it is, ask someoneout.
Um, so I think sometimes for me,it's all.
Mentally how I feel in thatmoment.
You know, one of the ways Igrappled with this was all of
the people I knew who wanted tobe in the entertainment
(12:20):
industry.
Mm oh yeah.
God, a fascinating world.
Well, it, it is amazing to mehow many people thought that
their goodness was gonna lead totheir career?
Mm-hmm like they got thisspiritual idea.
That being loving is a good,good idea.
Cause it is yeah.
(12:41):
Healing, your trauma and beingless reactive in the world is a
great idea.
And there are people who Icounseled when I was younger,
you know, uh, um, because youknow, I, before I was a
professional at this, I wasdoing this for everyone in my
circle.
Right.
I was counseling.
Oh, I'm sure they loved it.
Yeah.
At least I've been, my motherwas my first client when I was
five, you know?
So, um, so.
(13:03):
That was a paradigm that Ibumped into so frequently with
people I knew who had this ideathat if they had the talent and
that they were good in theirhearts, that that was gonna lead
to the career.
And then you would look at allof the assholes would become
very successful and see thatgoodness has nothing to do with
it.
Yeah.
(13:23):
Nor does not talent.
Yeah.
It's so true.
Nor does talent and ability.
So in that case, there has to beluck.
There has to be fortune.
There has to be happenstance.
There has to be that you getchosen and you don't, and it
doesn't mean anything.
It's just that 50% of ourexperience in is in this
mysterious existence, includesrandomness and chaos.
(13:47):
Mm-hmm.
How, um, like, I know youmentioned you worked at Playboy.
How did you find that side ofthe industry?
Especially at that time?
Cause I think so much haschanged, you know, over the
years and, um, everything else,but I can imagine it was a
difficult industry to be a partof.
(14:09):
You know, I was, I was fortunatefrom the difficulty of the
injury to be on the studio side.
Mm.
And the studio side of theentertainment industry is a
corporate atmosphere.
Mm, okay.
Okay.
It's yeah, it's the world ofproduction and the making of
product.
Mm-hmm, that all of the reallyjuicy, but I'll tell you in the
(14:31):
entertainment.
Even on the corporate side, it'sthe one place where having a
personality disorder will notkeep you from having a job,
right?
you could be a borderlinepersonality disorder, rageful,
crazy person and run a studio orrun an agency, or be a how high
powered executive.
And so I certainly saw a littlebit of that.
(14:53):
What was interesting in, in thefour years at Playboy, which.
The last place I worked as thison, we was rising up.
Playboy was a wonderful place towork.
The, the atmosphere was warm andjoyful and conscious.
And, um, not at all.
What people from the outsidemight well, you, I granted there
(15:14):
was a, it was a party atmosphereand I got laid off at the moment
where Chicago said, Los Angelesis a party.
We need to stop the party.
And 20 people got laid off andeverything changed.
Um, But it, it was not a placeof nefarious, difficult
entertainment industry stuff,but you know what we were
selling.
(15:35):
Right, right, right, right.
Was soul eating to me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So that was interesting to be ina place that was ultimately
about sex and sexuality, whichwas fine with me cuz I, I, you
know, sex and sexuality is my,you know, jam.
Yeah.
Um, um, Personally it was that Icould, I literally could see my
(15:59):
soul being eaten away because Iwasn't serving.
Or, or I wasn't serving.
I understood.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Understood.
And I guess as well, um, youknow, it's, it's, it's hard to,
you know, have a passion.
You obviously have a gift and tobe able to move forward and
build up that career where, toyour point, you're helping
(16:21):
people, you're teaching.
You're also doing something thatyou're passionate about.
It's.
It's I think that's more rarethat you think so many people
are kind of stuck in jobs andyou know, you end up just
continuing down and you're like,what's your hobbies?
What's your passions.
And the amount of my friends arelike, oh, I don't really have
one.
You're like, yeah.
And I'm not, I'm not findingjoy.
(16:42):
Yes.
Find the joy come on.
That's life.
You know, one of the things thatwas true for me about this.
Journey the path that the desireto get on the path and create a
life, a career and a businesswhere I could do what I loved to
be remunerated well for it.
Yeah.
Um, took a really long time.
Yeah.
(17:02):
That and, um, the experience ofhaving the world say no, Over
and over again, but knowing myyes was interesting because it
was wildly painful, but it, itwas clear as a bell.
Like there wasn't when I hadpainful, I had a moment.
(17:26):
It was after the television showwas canceled and.
And I had several opportunitiescame up for being, because I was
so visible for four or fivemonths on TV.
Right?
So there was a conference in NewYork city with a bunch of other
spiritual leaders.
There was a workshop insomewhere and there was another
workshop in somewhere else.
And within the space of threeweeks, each one was canceled for
(17:48):
lack of registration.
Oh, wow.
And I was all I barely gottenover the televis should show me
and canceled and I'm like, it'sgonna take me two years to build
up my career.
And then bam.
In the first of those two years,it was like, Nope.
Nope, Nope.
Yeah.
That's hard.
It was.
But you wanna know something,there was never a moment where
(18:12):
that no.
Had any meaning for.
At all never good.
I was so clear of my yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That speaks to fate.
Yes.
Yes.
I could feel back then in 2004and five where I was barely
making a living and facing noafter no after no, I could feel
this life.
(18:34):
this life where, where I'msuccessful and abundant and
prosperous and, and loving, youknow, where my work has taken
me.
Um, and I could feel that Ithink a lot of people shrink
away from following their dreamsbecause the first no, or two,
yeah.
It's tells them that the worlddoesn't want what they have to
(18:55):
offer.
It's like, yeah, that's notreally accurate.
It's true.
Persistence is the key.
But it's having that confidenceas well to be like, no, I know
this is what I wanna do, or Iknow that this is what I'm good
at.
Um, so question switching it,um, a little bit.
So you obviously studiedastrology, you mentioned it at
(19:18):
the start of this call.
Um, and it was a full moon, butlast night.
Yeah.
Was it last?
Yeah.
Yesterday?
Yeah.
We're out for a walk and I waslike, damn like that.
Moon is incredible.
So tell me mm-hmm when there's afull moon, how.
Because I think again,sometimes, like we're not
conscious of, you know, howwe're feeling and we put it down
(19:40):
to, oh, yesterday was a busy dayor, you know, I'm stressed out
whatever it is, but I feel likethere's so much more in that
kinda cosmic raise of what'sgoing on in the universe and how
it affects us.
So, um, tell me more about it.
Ha well, first of all,energetically speaking, there is
an amplification of.
That we move through on amonthly basis.
(20:02):
And when the sun and the moonare in the same place, what we
called a new moon mm-hmm youknow, farmers used to plant
mm-hmm when the sun and the moonwere together.
But when you put thegravitational pull of these two
luminaries in the same place,they're yanking on the earth in
a very big way.
And they are pulling the waterof the earth downward.
(20:23):
Yep.
because the gravitational polescoming from one side, right.
Pens, tides change, right?
Yep.
And we are 70% water and we areexperiencing some pull down,
whatever that means.
Just words.
Right.
Mm-hmm words to describe a kindof energetic sense.
Yes.
(20:44):
Then as the lunar cycleprogresses and the moon crosses
the other side of the cosmos andnow the gravitational pull is
equal from both sides.
The water is not being pulleddown into the earth, but up into
the crops we have planted, whichis why we harvest in the full
moon.
Cuz all of the energy is up inthe wheat Berry.
(21:07):
Oh.
And so that same upwards wateryexpansion, we feel energetic.
While empirical studies mightnot show that certain events
happen more frequently during afull moon.
Talk to anybody works in, uh,um, a school or an emergency
(21:28):
room, you know, where they dayto day get to see the evidence
of sort of chaotic energy.
Then they will tell you thatit's always crazier in the full.
No, my, my word for this isamplified.
Okay.
Everything is amplified in afull moon mm-hmm right.
And so between this sort ofpolling energy at the new moon
(21:51):
and amplification of energy atthe full moon, we definitely
have an ability to say, oh, it'snot just that I had a crazy day
at work.
Mm-hmm that there's more goingon than meets the eye, but for
my money, The focus on new moonsand full moons is really much
more about a spiritual practice.
Okay.
Right.
Yeah.
That we plant seeds in new moonsand harvest in full moons than
(22:15):
the same thing to be said, canbe said about our conscious
attention on the desires that wehave to create.
Talking about manifestation.
Yes.
We manifest things by firstdeclaring our desire and our
intention to have them to createthem.
And that's what we do at everynew moon, because the energy of
(22:36):
the solar system is guiding usto do that.
And then when we're in the fullmoon, the, the culmination
moment.
That in farming looks like theharvest.
What happens when the harvest wetake the wheat Berry, but we
leave the CHF.
We don't want the CHF mm-hmm Andthen what happens with that
leave behind stuff is it can, itcan, um, decompensate and turn
(22:58):
into fertilizer for the nextcrop.
So at the full moon, we're doingthese two things.
We're lifting up that whichwe've created, and we're making
sure that we leave the.
Behind that doesn't serviceanymore.
And that shows up in full mooncelebration as gratitude and
release.
What am I grateful for?
(23:19):
What am I ready to release?
And then the signs in astrologythat the moon and the sun are in
can give some distinctions aboutwhat area of consciousness to
focus.
Right.
So the full moon that we're inor were in, you know, the other
day before we met today was incancer.
Mm-hmm cancer is the archetypeof the mother and the home and
(23:40):
the heart and family andintimacy and feelings and
tenderness and vulnerability.
And so these last couple ofdays, the full moon's gratitude
would be all the ways that youare practicing self care and,
and, and attending to thenurturing needs that you have,
because that's what the cancerarche.
Is all about, and then what therelease moment of this would be,
(24:02):
what, what gets in your way ofa, of, of sort of feeling more
whole complete and able to climbthe mountain of your ambitions,
where the sun is Capricorn, themountain that we climb up.
Yeah.
And so what we're letting go ofin a cancer moon is everything
about not taking care ofourselves, of not putting
ourselves first of runningaround the airplane, trying to
(24:23):
help everybody with their oxygenmask, but you haven't put yours
on yeah.
And so that's, that's the themearchetypally of the full moon
that we've just had.
And so as a spiritual practice,as a way of relating to this
existence, that we are a part ofhonoring the new moon in full
(24:43):
moon is natural because that'swhat the system is doing.
The system says our consciousand our unconscious is lining up
at the new moon.
And so it's a great time to bein both conscious awareness of
what you desire, but connectingto your unconscious where all
the manifestation juice happens.
And then two weeks later, we'rein this place of gratitude and
(25:04):
release.
And this is what our ancestorsdid, right?
Yeah.
Our first peoples.
Use the sun and seasons tocreate civilization because they
told you when to plant, when toreap, when to rest, when to move
mm-hmm and then the movement ofthe moon governed, the more sort
(25:25):
of inner communal experiences,um, and certain pagan rituals
developed over the years ofhonoring the P moon honoring the
full moon.
And so I like.
I respond to that as a way offeeling connected to the cycles
that we are already connectedto.
We might as well notice them andhonor them and work with them.
(25:47):
Oh, for sure.
I feel like I need to pay moreattention to, um, like the Fu
moon cycles.
Like I'm, so I'm a Scorpio andI'm obsessed with reading my
star sign.
I read it every week, everymonth.
Um, You know, I I'm very muchaware that you can read
something and connect it back ifyou want to.
(26:09):
Right.
Like you can say something andbe like, oh my God, that's so
me, but I'm very much my starsign.
The only thing I'm missing isthe jealousy part.
Um, but I get very possessiveover my friends, but, um, I am,
I feel all of that.
Like how we are kind of what ourmakeup is.
And I'm always very conscious tokind of keep aligned with the
(26:32):
weaknesses of my sign and.
Trying to use things or willmake me a little bit stronger,
but yeah, I think that'smarvelous.
I mean, that's part of the valueof astrology, even at that low
level of like, just beingcurious about your, about your
sunshine.
Yeah.
I'll tell you this.
I don't know your chart.
I've never looked at it, butI'll bet there's something in
(26:53):
there.
That allows you to more easilyconnect with, you know,
forgiveness and, and balance andharmony.
So that mitigates the, thepersonal sense of jealousy that
might typically be associatedwith the Scorpio archetype.
Yes.
Yeah.
So that's, that's the value of,of like knowing your whole
chart?
Yeah.
Um, because it's very, veryreflective of who you are.
(27:16):
Mm-hmm mm-hmm it really is.
One of the reasons I think Ibecame an astrologer on a more
existential level is that mybody is so sensitive to energy
that I'm constantly havingsensations in my body that I now
know are simply based on theenergetic movement.
(27:38):
Because I've had 25 years ofbeing able to look at right how
the planets are moving and howmy body is feeling.
So for the first 38 years of mylife, I had a myth about myself
that there was something wrongwith me that I was probably sick
all the time and that I wasgonna die, horrible death
because my father had been veryill as a man.
(27:58):
He had a, he had a disease.
It had common variable immunedeficiency disorder had a
terrible, had terrible health.
And I had these terriblesensations all the time where I
would feel like sick, exceptthat it's not sick.
It's like what?
I now call moon sick.
So I can have moments where Idon't feel good in my body, but
(28:19):
it's just energy.
And if I look at the astrologyand see what I think is causing
it, the moment it passes, thefeeling goes away.
So I was just misinterpretingthe sensations of my body for
the first 40 years and learninghow to read the contextual tool
that told me why my body wasfeeling a certain way.
Energetically, do you ever, um,feel different energy from
(28:43):
different people?
I speak about this a lot withsome of my girlfriends that, you
know, if you're around, I, Idon't know.
And I don't wanna say you getlike a bad feeling about people,
but you know, sometimes it'sjust, I don't, I, I don't even
know how to describe it.
It's like sometimes I'm drawn topeople and I feel great when I
walk away and, you know, yes,you could say, it's your
personality, you know, beauty,whatever.
(29:05):
But there are other people thatis.
I don't know.
You just get, I don't, I, Idunno how to describe it.
I feel like it's just energy,but, well, it is just energy and
I, I know for myself that I canbe say out at a gathering, I am
extremely extroverted and, um,pretty sunny.
In my personality, right?
(29:26):
So when I am in that state, Ilike everybody.
And, and it'll be reallyinteresting to me to like, be at
a table for example, and besitting next to somebody and be
very aware.
I don't want to talk to you.
Right.
Right, right.
Right.
And then other people of fact, IThanksgiving, it's like, you
know, someone on my left,someone on my right.
(29:48):
It was like, Ooh, very differentexperiences.
now I didn't look at theircharts, but I betcha.
If I did, I would see aconnection energy between the
two charts where I felt.
Yummy in the energeticconnection and just something
that would be like friction inthe other.
Yes.
Yeah.
Cause I'm sure that woman was apure, fairly wonderful woman.
She was certainly friends withthe people in the crowd and it
(30:10):
was a lovely crowd.
So she's unlikely to behorrible.
It just, wasn't an energeticmatch.
Yeah.
And astrology reflects that.
God, that's so interesting.
I love this subject.
Um, so I really want to bemindful, um, of your time.
So I will ask one more question.
(30:30):
That's good.
Um, and then we have like aquick fire around and, uh, I
promise I will let you get backto your, um, everyday life.
So I ask every guest.
Um, to be honest, the reason Istarted this podcast was, um,
looking at what beauty means topeople and not just, you know,
makeup or skincare, but likedeep down, what makes you happy?
(30:53):
Like what makes you passionateand really trying to encourage
those types of conversations.
So I will ask you the same.
What does beauty mean to you?
Well, What an interestingquestion.
I can just say what came up forme when you asked is I am
reminded of how profound sharedlaughter is.
(31:18):
Yeah.
Life is painful.
It is painful to be here.
It's painful to be in a body.
Um, and life is wildly joyful.
Mm-hmm And I think that when Ithink about it's funny, because
even just beauty as superficialthings, that's a disconnector
(31:41):
like, yes, beauty might bebeauty in that manner, but that
beauty is something that is muchmore about let's, you know,
admire that from afar.
Yes.
You don't actually get to ownthat.
You get to observe that andmaybe be moved by it.
Mm-hmm But when.
When people share a moment ofdepth and intensity that erupts
(32:03):
into laughter then connectionoccurs.
Yes mm-hmm and that, I thinkthat's, what's beautiful is
connection.
I love that.
That's a great, great answer.
Um, okay.
Quick, far round.
So say whatever comes into yourhead.
Um, and don't judge me for thesequestions.
uh, so favorite cocktail.
(32:25):
I don't drink, but it was anapple Martin.
Oh, great.
Great cocktail.
Um, who would play you in amovie?
Robert Downey, Jr.
Oh, I love him.
Oh my God.
I love him so much.
I get mistaken for him a lot.
I could see that.
Yeah.
I definitely could see that.
Um, most used emoji, uh, mostused.
(32:50):
Golly, why am I stopping onthis?
I have to check.
probably a kissy face or a.
Smile.
That's good.
Let's say smile's If you couldbe anyone for a day, who would
you be?
Oh my God.
I, I know.
Oh my God.
(33:10):
I, oh my God.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Who would I be?
Somebody who can do somethingphysically spectacular, like an
athlete.
Yeah.
I'm not gonna, I can't, I can't,I can't grab one for you
specifically, but that I wouldwanna have the experience of
someone who can move in theirbody in some profound, like a
diver or a gym, a gymnast.
Oh, Yo.
No, that would be amazing.
(33:31):
Yeah.
Even just to be flexible.
um, if you could, oh wait, wait,wait a dancer, a ballet dancer,
an incredibly gifted male balletdancer who can jump and be
fabulous.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
That'd be great.
Um, if you could relive one ofyour dreams over and over, but
won, it would definitely involvesinging.
(33:56):
I'm a singer.
This is probably one of the mostjoyful expressions that there is
in my body is to sing.
I love to sing.
Yeah.
Um, I don't, I know this is sortof a, I, I don't know how.
It's it's easy to say as asinger, this is not a lightning
round.
I'm totally fucking up yourlighting round going Downing
this.
(34:17):
But like, I think in the olddays, it might have been like a
moment where I was performingfor a lot of people and, you
know, being giving.
But, you know, I had anexperience about six months ago
where I was, I sing every dayand I have tracks that I work in
and I live in a place with lotsof great acoustics and far
neighbors.
And I had a moment recentlywhere I was in a prayerful
experience of singing, likeconnected to mother.
(34:40):
And it was so spectacular if Icould live that over and over
and over again, that'll be alittle bit like being in heaven.
Yeah.
Oh, I love that.
Um, okay.
Last one.
Um, what is your life motto orfavorite phrase that you live
by?
I slept and dreamed that lifewas joy.
I woke and found that life wasservice.
(35:03):
I served and found that serviceis joy.
Oh wow.
That's amazing to gory his taggory.
Who's an Indian Saint.
Oh my gosh.
That's the most profound ideathat runs.
Wow.
That's incredible.
Um, Hey, thank you so much.
Um, I really, really appreciate,it's been a great conversation.
(35:27):
I can't wait to listen to thisback.
I also, can't my mom delight mypleasure Lenox.
Yes, we, hopefully we will keepin touch, but yeah.
Hey, thank you so much for yourtime.
I really, really appreciate it.
It was really my pleasure.
Thank you so much.
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