April 24, 2025 • 44 mins
This week, we’re diving deeper—not just into outdated strategies that no longer serve us as runners over 40, but into the powerful role identity plays in our running journey.
As runners, we can define ourselves by pace, distance, or race goals. But over time, that performance-based mindset can start to feel limiting—or even discouraging. In this episode, we talk about what it means to step into a new identity: one that prioritizes long-term health, strength, and the joy of movement.
Angie and Kevin both share their own evolutions as runners, and together we offer practical tips for embracing the identity of a lifelong runner—someone who listens to their body, trains smarter, and finds meaning beyond the stopwatch. We also unpack the power of language and self-belief, and how the words we use can either reinforce old habits or help us create new ones.
If you're navigating this transition too, we invite you to reevaluate how you see yourself as a runner and align your strategies with where you are now—and where you want to go.
And don’t forget—we’ve got a free five-day running challenge starting May 12th! We’d love for you to join us.
00:58 Aging and Running: Embracing Change
01:42 Outdated Strategies and New Approaches
03:20 The Importance of Identity in Running
04:10 Personal Running Journeys
06:23 Redefining What It Means to Be a Runner
07:43 The Power of Self-Identity
12:20 Words and Identity: The Impact on Performance
19:40 Evolving as a Runner: New Identities and Strategies
24:19 Embracing the Concept of Training
25:53 Shifting from Running to Training
28:24 Training with Wisdom and Recovery
30:35 The Importance of Identity in Running
37:36 Evolving as a Lifelong Runner
Join the Team! --> https://www.realliferunners.com/team
Thanks for Listening!!
Be sure to hit FOLLOW on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or your favorite podcast player
Leave a review on Apple Podcasts. Your ratings and reviews really help and we read each one!
Come find us on Instagram and say hi!
Don't forget: The information on this website is not intended to treat or diagnose any medical condition or to provide medical advice. It is intended for general education in the areas of health and wellness. All information contained in this site is intended to be educational in nature. Nothing should be considered medical advice for your specific situation.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Angie (00:00):
Welcome to the Real Life Runners podcast, episode number
407.
Today we're continuing ourconversation about why running
is starting to feel different ifyou're a runner over 40, not
only just because you're usingoutdated strategies, but today
we're taking it one level deeperbecause if you don't change this
one thing that we talk abouttoday, there's no way that
you're going to get the resultsthat you're wanting.
(00:21):
So if that sounds interesting,stay tuned.
(00:51):
what's up runners?
Welcome back to the show today.
Kevin's with me.
Hello Kev.
Kevin (00:55):
Hello, Angie.
Angie (00:57):
Hello, Angie.
so today we're, continuing ourconversation about running as we
age, and this is one of thosethings that not a lot of people
like to talk about, but this isone of those things that's
literally happening every day.
We are getting older, but youcan change and you can.
Determine how you experienceaging as a runner from some of
(01:18):
the things that we've beentalking about over the past few
weeks.
And this is really just settingsome of the stage.
We've got some really excitingtrainings coming up.
Our five day challenge is comingback in May, so stay tuned for
that.
We're gonna be kicking that offMay 12th.
So mark your calendars and I'lllet you know when registration
is available for you to sign upfor our five day running
challenge.
(01:39):
It's coming back and it's gonnabe better than ever, but.
Over the last few weeks here onthe podcast, we've been talking
about outdated strategies.
So a couple episodes ago we weretalking about those things about
how our training and ournutrition need to change and
shift as we get older becauseour body's changing and so our
training needs to also, and theway that we are adapting.
(02:00):
All of this is changing, right?
Your body physiology isdifferent after 40 than it was
when you were in your twentiesand your thirties.
And so if you're still trying todo the same thing that you did,
then even if it worked for youare probably noticing that
things are different and you'renot getting the same results,
Kevin (02:14):
which is super unfortunate because it'd be
great if we could just keepdoing the same thing for year
upon year and just keep gettingphenomenal results out of it.
But that's just not the case.
And fighting against it is what?
That's a losing battle.
Angie (02:24):
It is.
And then last week, if youhaven't listened to last week's
episode, I highly suggest youpause this, come back to it and
go check out Cindy's story.
Because Cindy is a perfectexample of it's never too late
to start.
And as long as you do things ina way to honor your body, you
can run for as long as you wantand you can do all sorts of
(02:44):
things that you previouslythought were unattainable or n
maybe never even on your radaras long as you are.
Using the right strategy andhonoring your body.
Kevin (02:54):
Yeah.
I'm only partway into thatepisode.
I don't listen to the episodeswhere I have to hear my own
voice.
'cause I still, I can't standit.
Even though we've done 400 plusepisodes, you
Angie (03:02):
really can't stand your voice.
Kevin (03:03):
No.
Still can't.
I know.
Really.
I know.
We're this many episodes, wegotta work on that and all the
playback, it still drives menuts, but listening to just, I'm
only a little bit in,'cause I,I.
My run ended today.
but it's such a good episode.
You guys have to go back and ifyou've missed it, go back and
check out 4 0 6.
4 0 6.
That is such a good episode.
Angie (03:19):
Yes.
And so today we're going onelevel deeper because you guys
know we don't like to staysurface level around here.
And we can talk aboutstrategies, we can talk about
training, we can talk aboutnutrition, we can talk about all
of these things that are on thatsurface level, but.
But underlying all of that, ifwe ignore the underlying layer,
then those things, obviously,like you might start to see some
(03:42):
results, but you might not getthe full power of all of those
results.
And that thing that we'retalking about is your identity.
Your identity is how you seeyourself and how you.
See what's capable or whatyou're, what you are capable of,
like what you believe you arecapable of and what you think is
possible for you.
Because you can change yourplan, you can change your
(04:04):
workouts and your nutrition, butif your identity doesn't shift,
there's, you're always gonna beleaving something on the table.
And I know about this because Idid not use to think of myself
as a runner.
When I first started running, itwas simply to lose weight and
get in shape, and I was anathlete my whole life growing up
playing different sports andrunning was always punishment
and runners were always crazy'cause I couldn't understand how
(04:27):
someone would actually,genuinely enjoy.
I.
Just going out to run becauseespecially if there was no ball
involved, you're over herelaughing.
I,
Kevin (04:36):
I, because I got into running for literally the
opposite of that.
Yeah.
Like I, I got into runningbecause there, that's weird.
There were weird people whowanted to just go run and there
wasn't a ball involved.
I
Angie (04:45):
know.
It's the strangest thing to me.
When I first started running, itwas just a means to an end.
It was I wanted to have quoteunquote, the body of a runner,
and I thought running was goingto give that to me.
And then I met this crazy manstanding next to me and he liked
running just for running, and Idid not understand that, but he
was cute and he had dimples.
So I was like, okay, let mecheck this out and see if this
(05:07):
is something I could get into alittle bit, especially if it's
something that can help me stayin shape because I'm no longer a
part of.
An organized sports team.
And so for the longest time whenI was still out there running, I
still would not call myself arunner.
Yes, I ran, I did five Ks, I didother things, but I didn't think
of myself as a runner.
(05:28):
And I'm trying to think back andthink what, how I qualified my
definition of a runner and why Ididn't say that I was one.
And I'm not super clear on itbecause it was a very long time
ago, but I think that.
In some ways I felt like I hadto earn that title from a pace
or a distance.
(05:48):
And because I always saw Kevinas a runner and Kevin was much
faster than me, he enjoyedrunning more than I did and
would go out and run much longerthan I did.
So I was like, I'm none of thosethings, so I must not be a
runner.
And I don't think that this wason a conscious level.
I think all of that was on avery subconscious level.
Kevin (06:06):
Yeah, I'm sure that there was some comparison to me and
that was probably holding backyour.
Original adoption of I'm arunner because I was out there
doing, longer distances andfaster paces.
And so it's hard to not havethat immediate comparison.
Yeah.
'cause I helped spur you intothe whole running thing also.
Angie (06:22):
Yeah.
I think that one of my mainshifts I.
Really came when I started tosee running as a skill that
could be improved because for along time I didn't think that I
was a runner because I thoughtyou almost had to be born a
runner.
Like you're either good atrunning or you're not good at
running.
And I put myself as not good atrunning, so therefore I'm not a
(06:42):
runner.
Where I looked at people likeyou and saw how easily running
seemed to come for you, like youcould just go off and you loved
it and you were good at it andit.
That was never how I experiencedrunning.
So maybe that's how I wasdefining running was not only
are you good at it, but you alsoenjoy it.
And those are two things that Inever.
Considered myself, consideredtrue for me.
Kevin (07:04):
by the time you met me as a runner, I had already gone
through a whole running identitytransformation myself.
Oh
Angie (07:10):
really?
Kevin (07:11):
'cause I had, I ran in high school.
I was pretty good in highschool.
I walked on in college.
I was nowhere near as good asthe people that I was running
with.
I stopped running for a fewmonths.
And then I had to figure out howI wanted to run, but not be part
of an organized team, but stillrunning.
Oh yeah.
Like you flipped from being likea ball sport athlete and then
Running was gonna be like athing that you were doing, but
(07:31):
you were also doing likeintermural sports and other
things like that.
Yeah.
Like you still had otherathletic ventures.
I had to figure out how to run.
On my own, and that took a wholeidentity overhaul myself.
Angie (07:41):
yeah.
So we've both been through this.
Yeah.
And I think that's really goodbecause people listening you
listeners can hopefully identifywith either me or Kevin, because
that's really what we aretalking about today is how.
After 40, we really have tostart to shift our identity as a
runner.
And you are still a runner.
And this is really an importantthing that I want to hit home
(08:02):
before we move forward, which isyou are a runner if you run and
if you choose to take on thattitle.
And that's what one of thethings that I realized is that I
didn't have to.
Hit a certain time or hit acertain distance.
Becoming a runner was simply achoice to call myself one.
And once I made that choice tobecome a runner and to call
(08:22):
myself a runner, I then startedacting a lot more like a runner.
And I'm like, if I'm gonna be arunner, if I'm gonna call myself
a runner, then there's certainthings that I have to do because
in my mind, there's certainthings that runners do and they
go out and run and they try toget better and they try to get
faster.
And once I started to numberone, see running as a.
Skill that could be improved.
And then number two, actuallycall myself a runner Then.
(08:46):
I was able to start making allof these improvements that I
never would've imagined possiblefor myself.
And so if you're sitting therelistening to this and you don't
yet call yourself a runner, Iwould encourage you to start
there.
And I would encourage, or evenone step back, which is
understanding that running is askill that can be improved.
You're not born a runner or nota runner.
(09:07):
You're not born a good runner ornot a good runner.
You get to just decide.
You're gonna call yourself arunner and.
Then when you choose that, youthen start to do the things that
runners do.
So if you're thinking like, oh,I'm too slow to be a runner, or
I walk sometimes, or I've neverrun a race, or I only do five
Ks, or I don't look like arunner.
There's all these differentthoughts and beliefs that can
(09:30):
make us believe that we're not arunner.
And I think that this is areally big problem, and this is
one of the conversations thatKevin and I were just having
before we hit record.
Was that if you don't even quitebelieve that you're a runner
yet, you could still be tryingto prove that you are by doing
the things that you think realrunners quote unquote do.
(09:52):
Like pushing yourself reallyhard every day run, going out
and running more and more mileslike some of these mistakes are
these.
Old, outdated trainingstrategies that we've talked
about in past episodes thatwe'll touch on a little bit
today, but over training,pushing through pain, under
fueling yourself, restrictingcalories.
if you think that's what runnersdo and you're still trying to
(10:14):
prove to yourself that you're arunner, it's going to be very
easy to continue to fall intothose traps.
Kevin (10:19):
a hundred percent.
Let's go.
Like step by step down thesethoughts.
Do you have, I'm too slow.
So that means you're gonna goout and just push yourself way
too hard on all of your runs.
That's gonna be an issue.
I walk sometimes.
Maybe that's what you need to doto bring your heart rate back
down, to turn an easy run intoan easy run.
So if you're like, ah, if I walkever during my run, then I'm not
really a runner, so I just, Ican't.
Walk ever.
(10:39):
So now you're over training thatthing.
I've never run a race.
Great.
Signing up for race after race,but never actually giving
yourself time to train properlyfrom the race.
Yeah, that's gonna lead to awhole lot of disappointing race
results.
if you have these thoughts andthen you try to fight back and
really just push hard againstthem, it's setting you up for
not a great experience and thennot getting necessarily the
(10:59):
results that you want off ofthis.
So even though you're reallypushing and fighting for the,
the opposite of these phrases.
You are, you're using poorstrategies to try and get it.
And you can just simply say, I'ma runner because I'm going out
and running.
I am a runner.
I run, therefore I'm a runner.
And that's all you need.
Angie (11:16):
And so that's step one is to really claim that identity,
which most of you.
Can do right now without havingto prove or earn anything.
And then once you claim thatidentity, the question then
becomes, what kind of a runnerdo I want to be now?
So this next part applies to allof you, whether or not you
already think of yourself as arunner or whether or not that
(11:38):
last conversation made youslightly uncomfortable because
you're realizing that you don'tthink of yourself as a runner.
Choose right now to callyourself a runner because then
the rest of this conversationtoday will apply to you because
now you get to decide, now thatI am a runner, or those of you
that have been runners for 10,20, 30 years, you still get to
(11:59):
decide today what kind of arunner am I going to be moving
forward?
And this is where we really wantyou to start leaning into this
identity of real life runner orlifelong runner because your
identity.
Influences your decisions.
And this is why this is soimportant.
This is why we're going to godeeper on this and really hit
home.
'cause some people think tothemselves, this is just
(12:19):
semantics.
Like it doesn't really matterwhat I call yours, what I call
myself, but it definitely doesbecause your identity, who you
believe yourself to be.
Influences your decisions ontraining or running or taking a
rest day.
It influences your self-talk.
We all know that we have bothpositive and negative ways that
(12:39):
we talk to ourselves.
And who you believe yourself tobe and what you believe yourself
to be capable of is going toinfluence that level of
self-talk.
It's going to influence whatkind of goals you set for
yourself.
Whether you give yourselfpermission to try new things and
to fail and to keep going, or ifyou just choose to see yourself
as a failure and then quit.
All of these things areinfluenced by your identity.
Kevin (13:02):
I mean your identity.
People that suggest that it'ssemantics.
here's a setup for you.
Try and visualize this.
Your boss walks in'cause I, I'm.
Good friends with my boss also,I think if he is gonna have a
conversation with me and heopens it with Kevin, we need to
talk.
That's a very differentimmediate feeling that I go to
than, Hey Kev, can I talk toyou?
And he has called me by boththings, depending on the
(13:23):
particular conversation that weare about to have.
And one of them is much morelighthearted, And it is.
These that is my name.
And our name is so core to ouridentity, but having
conversations that opens withKevin, can we have a
conversation versus, Hey Kev,can we talk?
Is so it's semantics.
Yeah.
It's two letters it's in.
That's all it is.
(13:44):
But you can see that thedifference between the name
someone calls you is socritical.
So this is why the names that wecall ourselves.
Runner, not a runner.
Whatever adjective you wannathrow in front of runner once
you've fully adopted that you'rea runner is super critical to
every, all of the actions anddecisions that you're making
following that.
Angie (14:04):
Absolutely.
And I love that you point thatout because I think that a lot
of people can relate to that.
if you have a nickname, like mynickname is Angie, and I've been
Angie basically my entire life.
I actually had this conversationwith my mom the other day
because she was over here.
And, for, if you haven't beenfollowing me on Instagram, I
have been put.
Haven't been posting about it asmuch recently.
I need to post more about itbecause I just absolutely love
(14:27):
that.
My mom comes over three days aweek to work out with me now,
because for the longest time,we're talking years, I've tried
to get my mom to start workingout.
On a regular basis.
And finally I just said to her,mom, just come over to my house.
Come over to my house Monday,10:00 AM 11:00 AM whatever time
it was, and we'll just, we'll doa workout together.
We'll both work out.
I'll be there for you.
(14:48):
I'll instruct you, I'll, helpyou modify whatever is going on.
And we've been doing it this wayfor a couple of months now,
which has been so fantastic.
And so anyway, my mom was at myhouse the other day and I asked
her.
When did you start calling meAngie?
Because for a long time sheactually just brought over this
box.
this is what kind of spurredthis conversation.
So my mom brought over a boxlast week of old pictures'cause
(15:10):
she was going through picturesand stuff in her, the one closet
of her house and found all ofthese old pictures.
And so she separated all thesepictures into piles, like one
for me, one for my sister.
And so she brought over all thephotos of me and I was looking
through these photos and insideof that box also was a baby book
like.
The My Baby's first milestonesand I was slipping through that
(15:33):
and she referred to me as Angelain all of those things, and she
was writing about my firstChristmas and all of these
things, and how wonderful it isto have Angela here, and I
haven't gone by Angela.
I don't even know how long sinceI was little and I don't
remember really people callingme that ever.
And so I asked her, when did I.
Become Angie and she said prettyearly on in life.
(15:54):
And I said, okay.
I wasn't sure if it was like,when I actually had a say, did I
ask to be called Angie?
And then people started callingme that, or was it sooner than
that?
She said, no, it was earlierthan that.
And I.
So I know how it feels, and ifyou have a nickname, you
probably know this feeling aswell.
If someone calls you by yourformal name of Angela, there's
this disconnect that happens andI'm like, you either don't know
(16:18):
me at all, or you definitelydon't know me well enough to
know that I don't go by Angela.
I go by Angie, and I've alwaysbeen Angie.
And then there's people thatcall me Anang also, which I
love.
But.
That's this identity piece, of,immediately when someone calls
you by a certain name, thatmeans something.
So if someone calls me, Angela,I know you don't know me very
(16:40):
well at all, right?
If someone calls me Angie, thatmeans, okay, you clearly, you
know me well, or maybe not, butyou at least know enough to know
my real name.
To know what your name is,right?
To know my name.
Identity influences everything,and I think that's really
important because your identityspeaks to you on a subconscious
level.
It's not conscious.
sometimes it is, but it alsospeaks to you on a very
(17:01):
subconscious level.
Kevin (17:03):
Yeah.
So if someone comes up and says,hey fast runner, do you
immediately like wince at that?
Because I've said it to peopleon our cross country and track
team, I'm like, oh man, quitethe fast runner today.
And they're like, what are youkidding?
Like they, they immediately pushback over this.
Some of them will say thank you,and it's a matter of like, how
different does that phrase gowith the identity that they've
(17:23):
given themselves?
Angie (17:24):
So it's their own level of belief.
Kevin (17:26):
Yes.
And so'cause I look at a bunchof people and it's look, you're
pretty fast.
You go out.
you see these things, I dunno,for some reason in the last few
weeks, they're, they've hit myfeet on all the different social
medias of what is an average 5Ktime and an average marathon
time, like worldwide right now.
And it's oh, maybe you're fasterthan you think you are.
Or maybe you're closure toaverage than you think you are.
And it's, they're interestingthings to go out there.
But when you go up and tellsomebody who doesn't necessarily
(17:50):
categorize themselves as a fastrunner, and you're like, Hey,
looking really fast today.
It's very interesting to see theresponse that people get.
Because once you startclassifying yourself in
different categories withinrunner, that leads to different
decision making, differentactions.
Angie (18:05):
And isn't it interesting too, that you could go up and
say that to somebody and youcould intend it to be.
A compliment.
And if they don't have thatlevel of belief in themselves,
they could completely see thatas an insult.
Yeah.
As you making fun of them.
Yes.
Like really like that, that'ssarcasm.
Kevin (18:22):
Yeah.
and this is why I'm doing mybest to try to avoid sarcasm,
which is a lifelong process.
It is,
Angie (18:29):
it is.
And, but it's.
All goes back to who that personbelieves themselves to be.
Like your sentence and the wordsthat you say could be the same,
but the way that they interpretit is different based on their
own level of identity and theirown level of self-belief in that
statement.
Kevin (18:46):
Yeah.
Which is why words matter, butso does your own identity
because your identity is goingto affect how you hear the words
that you're saying to yourselfand the words that other people
are saying to you.
Angie (18:55):
So if you are still operating.
As a runner who believes thatmore is better, that thinner is
better, that in order for me toget better as a runner, I just
have to push harder and I'lljust keep pushing hard.
I'll rest later or I'll skiprest.
Then you are operating from thatoutdated identity because things
(19:15):
like that did work in yourtwenties and thirties like, and
it.
It depends on who you are andyour level of experience and all
sorts of different factors, butat some point those things stop
working and those are some ofthe things that we've been
talking about over the past fewweeks.
And all of those things go backto the identity of runner,
either the one that you'vealready accepted for yourself or
(19:38):
your belief.
What a runner should be, or whoa runner is, or what a runner
should be doing, because we allhave a different definition of
what a runner is or what a goodrunner is, and that's really
what we're asking you to startto question today and start to
look at a little bit differentlywhen it comes to.
Your old runner identity or yourold identity of maybe not a
(20:01):
runner to the new identity thatyou would like to step into.
And we're gonna give you guys acouple options and examples of
this.
And I would love for you to alsocome up with your own as you
listen to this podcast and asyou reflect on it afterwards.
To say, okay, how am Iidentifying and how am I
possibly operating from an oldidentity that is no longer
(20:24):
serving me?
Kevin (20:25):
Yeah.
I like the, the metaphor thatyou got here.
you said that trying to createnew results from an outdated
identity is like trying to pr inshoes that don't fit anymore.
I'd like to suggest that itmight also be like trying to pr
in shoes that don't have acarbon plate sometimes.
Sometimes things evolve and youhave to join the evolution or
you're just not going to be ableto produce at the same level
anymore.
Angie (20:45):
So you and I were just having this conversation last
week when I was looking at theBrooks website Yes.
At my shoes, and we were lookingat different racing shoes, and
you made that comment aboutracing flats and how you used.
To race.
Kevin (20:58):
There's not even a term called racing flats anymore.
Like Racing flats used to be soridiculously thin.
Underneath.
Yeah, because the foam was oneof the heavier parts of the
shoe.
Like you just try to make theshoes as light as possible in
order to do it.
They were just, they were hardto run on.
They took out a bunch of thefoam,'cause it made it lighter,
and so they called them flatsbecause they look like your
normal running shoes, butshorter and now.
(21:19):
Racing shoes.
There are shoes out there thatare, that pros can't race in
that you and I could go out andbuy, but they're illegal to try
and go out and set a record.
And they're illegal to go outand try and win prize money in
because the stack site stackheight is too high on them.
'cause it's just how muchspringy foam can we put
underneath?
And if we have the plate at theright angle, then we need to
mask it with enough squishy foamaround it that you're, you.
(21:41):
Aren't just in pain as you runthe whole thing.
Yeah, it's, yeah.
And that your Achilles doesn'tjust blow up on you.
that's a different conversationabout shoes, but let's not dive
into that one too much planter
Angie (21:49):
fascia as well.
So let's go over some possibleold identities and then the new
runner identity.
That you can choose to stepinto.
Because remember, your identityis a collection of your
thoughts, your actions, yourslash behaviors, and then the
results that you have.
Because all of the results thatyou have in your life stems from
(22:12):
the actions that you take, andyour actions come from the
thoughts and the beliefs thatyou have about yourself, which
all come from your identity.
So we're Moving this one stepbackwards, we, that's what we've
been doing over the past coupleof weeks.
we've talked about the results,we've talked about, the actions
and the behaviors.
Now we're taking it that stepback further to really get, dig
into some of those thoughts andbeliefs and then possibly the
(22:34):
identity behind those.
So if you have the idea of, Ihave to.
Earn the title of runner, thenyou might be going out ask
yourself, okay, if I believethat's true, what will that lead
me to do?
What kind of actions, if Ibelieve I have to earn this will
I do?
So a lot of runners, if theybelieve this, and I know this is
one of the things that Ibelieved when I was.
(22:56):
When I believed I wasn't arunner was that I just needed to
go out and push harder becauseobviously pushing harder was
going to make me faster, andthen if I was faster, then maybe
I could call myself a runner ormaybe people would see me that
way.
Kevin (23:09):
So then you've connected to earning the title based off
of a.
A number on a clock somewhere.
Which is a lot of what this isearning the title is a number on
a clock or the distance of arace that you've signed up to
run.
Or how long is your longesttraining run?
People put a number to thisthing.
And in order to get to whateverthat is, you have to push real
hard to get to it.
Yeah.
And often it leads to, I have topush all the time to get to it
(23:29):
as fast as possible.
'cause I really would like toearn that title.
Yeah.
Because we want it now.
Yes, we do.
So I'm going to go out and grindday upon day.
And will you.
You grind yourself into powder.
Angie (23:39):
And what if instead, like, how would your actions be
different if you decided I don'thave to earn the title, I just
choose to own it right now.
And in choosing this title formyself, in choosing to call
myself a runner, a real liferunner, a lifelong runner, that
means that I go out and I trainevery day.
(24:00):
And I would love to talk alittle bit too, a little on a
side note about the wordtraining because I was.
Talking to a friend of mine theother day and she was asking me,
do your, the people that you'retrying to reach and the people
that you're trying to help, dothey really call it training or
do they just call it running?
And I'm like, oh, that's areally good point.
Ooh, good one.
I love that idea.
(24:21):
And so as a little side note,you don't have to be training
for a race.
In order to call what you'redoing training.
I like to call it trainingbecause we are all working
towards a goal.
So yes, you can just go out andrun and if you're not working
towards any sort of goal,running would probably be a good
word for it.
(24:41):
But if you are trying to worktowards some goal, I love to
call it training, and I wouldlove to invite you to start
calling it training because whenyou start calling it training,
you think of yourself more as arunner and as an athlete, all of
a sudden, not only.
Do I go out and run, but now I'mtraining for something.
And again, it doesn't have to bea race.
It can be, I just want to feelbetter on my runs.
(25:04):
I just wanna be able to run alittle bit longer.
I wanna be able to walk lesswhen I go out and run.
All of those are goals thatyou're working toward, towards,
and all of those are very.
Worthwhile and valid goals thatmake you a runner because you're
using running as a tool to helpyou gain something in your life,
(25:24):
whether it's strength or betterhealth, or a PR or a new
distance, or breaking down andchallenging yourself.
Like breaking down an old beliefof I never thought I could do
this, and now I'm challengingmyself to be able to do this
thing.
You're training for something.
And so using the word trainingis a very powerful shift and
yes.
It's semantics, but you can seehow when we make that shift and
(25:47):
start using different words,that allows us to start thinking
about ourselves differently.
Kevin (25:52):
Yeah.
I'm gonna move to your next oneand then continue on this whole
training versus running idea.
'cause it goes right with thenext one.
Your outdated identity of I pushthrough pain versus a newer
identity of I train with wisdomand recovery.
You didn't say a run.
With wisdom and recovery.
I trained, I didn't go for a runyesterday, but that is part of
my training.
(26:13):
I literally planned to not havea run yesterday as part of an
overall training program.
Yes.
Not my running program, but mytraining program, yes.
Included that as an off day.
Like I did not have a hugeamount of physical activity
yesterday outside of a veryvigorous egg hunt.
but
Angie (26:29):
And cornhole game.
Kevin (26:30):
And a cornhole game.
Yeah.
I know.
I.
I had to limber up before thatone and get my shoulder ready
for it.
but it's a whole differentstory.
but it's a training involves allof your activities, whereas you
say, oh, running is just thissmall portion of a day.
And if you're not going for arun every day, and even at the
highest level, I would saysuggest taking an off day once a
(26:51):
week that.
Training can still happen onthat day.
Training happens throughout theday.
Training is not just this smallwindow where you lace up your
shoes.
Angie (27:00):
And that connects back to what we were saying before about
how you don't have to earn it.
Because if you think that onceyou hit a certain distance or a
certain time or some certainnumber, that in your head means
that you're a runner.
You don't acknowledge the wholeprocess that it took to get
there.
And by calling yourself arunner, now at the beginning,
(27:22):
you then can start toacknowledge the process as the
way for you to achieve the goal.
And it's going through thatprocess of, that's what actually
makes you into a runner.
It's going out for your runsseveral times per week.
It's putting in the strengthtraining and the mobility and
the rest, and the recovery daysand training in a way.
(27:43):
For your body to adapt and getstronger.
And if you just say, I'm not arunner until I hit that number,
then it completely ignores theentire process that was required
for you to get there, which isactually when you became a
runner overall.
Kevin (27:59):
Sure.
Yeah.
do you see what
Angie (28:01):
I'm saying?
Yeah.
Kevin (28:01):
you've, you are a runner 'cause you adopt the identity.
But then once you're doing, butyou still
Angie (28:05):
have to do things to re you still do
Kevin (28:06):
things to
Angie (28:06):
reinforce the identity.
Just get
Kevin (28:08):
in a shirt that says I'm a runner.
Doesn't count if you're sittingon the couch every day.
Angie (28:11):
Correct.
Like
Kevin (28:11):
that.
that's just a shirt.
Angie (28:12):
Exactly.
Like you can choose to bewhoever you are, but then.
After you choose your identity,you then have to do the actions
that reinforce that identity.
'cause it's a loop,
Kevin (28:22):
right?
Otherwise you get this weirddisconnect and you feel awkward.
But training with wisdom is alsoa good one.
This one I get up against whenI'm training the high school
kids all the time becausethey've got a lot of energy on
some days.
Some days they're exhaustedbecause they have three tests in
a day, but sometimes they have alot of energy.
And I'm like, all Here's ourworkout for the day and we're
doing eight reps of whatever thedistance is, and they finish it
(28:44):
and they're like, I'm not thattired.
Should we do a couple more?
I'm like, no, you're good.
And there's a wisdom involved inknowing that you don't have to
push yourself.
To a breaking point.
Yeah.
Even on a hard day, like a hardday doesn't mean that you
finish, it collapsed on theground.
that's not necessarily what youneed.
There is time where you shouldpush yourself.
You should try and stretchyourself a little bit.
(29:06):
pushing through pain is fine onoccasion.
It's not a day in mantra thatyou should adopt every single
time.
There needs to be a balance toyour training.
That's where the wisdom and theexperience comes in.
And listening to some guidancealong the way and being like,
all right, this is a day that Iwant to have a little bit still
left over at the end of it, it'sstill a good workout.
I'm still getting benefits fromthis, but I'm gonna be able to
(29:27):
come back and maintain theconsistency for the next day and
the next day, and the next day.
I.
Angie (29:32):
And so that's really then taking that long-term view over
what's possible for you as well,and understanding that I'm not
there yet.
And in order for me to getthere, I have to meet myself
where I am, and I have to trainin a way that's very smart so
that some days I can just goeasy and then other days I can
push myself a little bit harderbecause pushing outside of your
comfort zone.
(29:53):
Is what is going to help you getto the next level, but not if
you ignore recovery and not ifyou just keep pushing every
single day.
Because people hear this ideaof, you have to get outside your
comfort zone and you have topush beyond what you're
currently capable of if you wantto improve.
And that's true.
A little bit of the time.
Not every single time that yougo out for a run, not every
(30:15):
single time you go to the gym.
If you go to the gym and you tryto lift heavy and you try to PR
on every single time you lift,you are going to be injured in a
couple of weeks, maybe even bythe end of that week.
it depends on how much you'rereally doing there, but like
these are some of those outdatedstrategies that again, come from
that underlying identity of.
(30:35):
I'm not a runner yet, or I needto prove it, or I'm a slow
runner, or those types ofthings.
changing from this idea of, Ionly, it only counts if I'm fast
or I'm only a runner if I'm fastor I'm not worthwhile unless I'm
fast.
I know that kind of.
Sounds a little bit farfetched,but we might not say it that way
to our, to ourselves and ourheads, but we can be thinking
(30:57):
that on a subconscious level.
So instead of just thinkingabout speed, you wanna jump in
here?
Kevin (31:03):
Sometimes we do say that out loud.
Yeah.
It's like sometimes thattransition happens.
that happened to me.
when I was around 20.
Yeah.
Of, I'm not a runner'cause I'mnot fast.
it often had the word enoughthrown on the end of it.
Yeah.
but I wasn't, but I think
Angie (31:16):
that's what good.
Because not everyone says fast.
Just say fast enough.
Kevin (31:19):
Yeah.
Angie (31:20):
I'm not fast enough to keep up with those guys.
Kevin (31:22):
Suggesting that there's some barrier, there's some
number on, again, there's somenumber on a clock that
determines who counts and whodoesn't count.
Yeah.
And, especially as runners aremoving into their forties,
fifties, there's a number on aclock that might be harder to
hit than it was in your twentiesand thirties.
And so if at any point in timeyou've got that idea of, maybe
(31:42):
you fully embraced, I'm a runnernow because you hit whatever
that num arbitrary number wasthat you're like, oh, I did get
fast enough.
I'm a runner, but now thatnumber seems to be slipping
away.
Yeah.
That's a tricky identity.
That's a real tough one, becausemaybe you literally did overcome
this number you made.
Yeah.
And you said, I did it.
I can now call myself a runner.
(32:04):
But what if you don't have thatnumber anymore?
Angie (32:06):
because.
Ultimately it's going to slipaway at some point.
At some point, right?
Like it's just a matter of when,there is going to be a point in
every runner's journey that theystart, that they get slower
instead of faster, and thatthere is going to be a time
where you hit your last PR inthat distance.
And no, none of us know whenthat actually is, which is the
freaky part of it all.
(32:26):
It's like the last time, like meas a mom and having teenage
daughters right now, I have a15-year-old and a 12-year-old.
I think back, and you never knowwhen it's the last time that
you're going to give them abath, for example, or the last
time that you're going to strapthem into a car seat.
there's just certain things andcertain milestones that just
happen along the way that youdon't realize that's the last
(32:48):
time you're going to do thatthing.
And it's really hard later whenyou do realize that.
But that's why it's importantfor us to value every single day
in every single moment, in everysingle race, which is really.
That consistency and the energythat you're putting into your
running and your training andyour identity as a runner or
(33:10):
even just as a healthy person.
I think that's a big part of ittoo, whether you call yourself a
runner or not.
Hopefully, after listening tothis episode, every single
person will raise their handwhen asked if they're runners,
but.
Maybe you really identify as ahealthy person or you want to be
a healthy person.
You have to start callingyourself that now in order for
you to do the things that aregoing to then reinforce that
(33:32):
identity.
Like going back to the reasonthat I started running, I ran to
burn calories.
It was simply a numbers game.
It was calories in, caloriesout.
I ran to burn more calories andThe reason that I wanted to run
longer was so that I could burnmore calories.
And the reason that I wanted topush harder and run faster was
because then I could burn morecalories in less time.
(33:53):
And that was my whole mindset,like I really didn't care how
long I ran.
other than that.
Number in the calorie boxbecause then that meant that,
not that I could eat more, butthat, I could create this
calorie deficit so that I couldlose weight, which ultimately
ended up backfiring, didn'treally work anyways.
And that's what a lot of runnersin this phase of life are
(34:15):
finding as well, is that ifyou're continuing to operate by
that idea of I'm running to burncalories, or I'm running to burn
off my food, your metabolismstarts to shift after the age of
40 because of all the way that.
The ways that your hormones areshifting.
It changes how your body usesglucose and uses insulin and
your cortisol levels, like allof the hormones are changing.
(34:36):
And so if you just keep thinkingabout restricting calories and
burning more calories, it'sgoing to start backfiring.
And I've been talking to so manywomen.
Who are still operating withthis idea of I exercise to burn
calories and then I restrict myfood so that my numbers and my
balance is correct, and they arejust continuing to gain weight.
(34:58):
They have no energy.
They're cranky, they're moody,and they just feel awful.
They have no energy for anythingand it's because their body's
not being nourished andsupported.
And so the, your body justdoesn't have not only what it
needs.
To get better, but just to evenmaintain where you are right
now.
And so a lot of women startdeclining in this phase of life
(35:18):
because they're still stuck inthis calorie burn mindset.
Kevin (35:22):
Alright, Instead of I run to burn calories.
What mindset are you taking onThat's a better frame off of
that one.
Something connected more towardshealthy.
Angie (35:30):
Yes, and strong.
Like I now value myself as astrong person, as a strong
runner.
Like I run to get stronger and Iuse running as really, I.
A part of my overall healthplan.
So my whole goal is to staystrong and actually to get
stronger.
I'm not just trying to maintainat this point in my life, I'm
trying to actually buildstrength and build endurance,
(35:53):
and it's also just a way for meto feel more alive and more
connected and to move my bodyand to honor my body and to
really.
Celebrate what my body's able todo.
And so instead of just thinkingabout burning calories, I am
seen running as a way that I cancontinue to get stronger, both
mentally and physically.
Kevin (36:10):
that's a much healthier approach towards, health, shall
we say.
Angie (36:14):
Yeah.
and it also allows me to.
on those days to honor my bodywhere I need rest today.
I, because I know that if I goout and I push myself, I'm
really just gonna be breaking mybody down even more and leaving
my body even more depleted,which is going to affect me
negatively in the long run.
Kevin (36:31):
they're all so connected that is the wisdom that you
train with.
Instead of pushing through pain,pushing through exhaustion, you
train with the wisdom that helpsmaintain your value of
consistency, that gives you theappropriate energy that then
leads to health.
It's interesting to me that youstarted getting into it to be
healthier.
Then you.
You got so focused on thenumbers, details.
And then you kinda were like,let's ignore the number detail
(36:53):
and just focus on the healthyaspect of it.
Yeah.
Like I got into running becauseI thought it was fun, and then I
got so bogged down in numbers ona clock.
Yeah.
And then I stopped being soworried about numbers on a
clock.
I still find them interesting.
I still like to keep track ofthem.
I'm so much more focused onrunning for the fun aspect of
it.
It goes back to, I think itoften goes back to where we came
(37:14):
in.
it's just a new evolution ofthat sort of framing that got us
into running in the first place.
Angie (37:20):
I really love that idea that it's almost like a
pendulum.
Pendulum swinging, right?
Like we started here, we swungover here for a while and now
we're coming back, but we'redoing it much more wise.
Wiser and with more intentionthat we're bringing into it?
Yes.
Kevin (37:35):
Far more intention.
Angie (37:36):
Yeah, because I think that's really what we can start
to hang onto is as we get olderand we start to embrace this
identity of a lifelong runner ora real life runner, that's not
something that fades with age.
It doesn't matter if my times.
Get slower because that's notwhat running is about for me
anymore.
yes, it's still fun to chasetimes.
It's still fun to go out and dospeed sessions and to go out and
(37:59):
sign up for races and see whereyou are right now.
And all of that is still fun andthat, and if you love.
Numbers, and you're a runnerthat likes the numbers.
I'm not telling you to get ridof that, like by all means, but
just decide what those numbersmean because we can attach
whatever meaning to thosenumbers that we want.
And so if you decide to take onthis identity of a lifelong
(38:21):
runner.
It's using your running and yourtraining as something that's
going to help you to getstronger and to help you
continue to grow as a person, tocontinue to help you stay
stronger.
just as a human and, That'snever gonna go away.
Kevin (38:36):
Yeah.
No, it's the lifelong healthyapproach, which you've adopted
for years now, and I think thatit's a constantly evolving thing
and sometimes you think thatyou've evolved past it.
you pointed out that if youwanna stick with the numbers,
you can hang on to some of thesenumbers, but just.
Make sure that none of them havetoo sticky of a connection to
your identity.
Yeah.
Like I know there's stillnumbers in my head that they're
(38:58):
gonna pop up that I'm like, oh,I'm not sure if I can hit that
number anymore and that might bean uncomfortable, day for me.
Yeah.
When that thing shows up.
'cause I'm like, oh, I didn'tthink that number meant anything
to me.
But apparently it does.
there's going to be.
Times just because you're like,oh, no, I've evolved.
I've got a more mature outlookon this thing.
It's gonna be fine.
There may still be things thatshow up sometimes, and that's
(39:18):
okay.
Yeah.
Like it doesn't have to beperfect all the time.
Sometimes new things come up andyou're like, oh, I thought I'd
moved past that part of myidentity.
Yeah.
Apparently I'm going to facethat right now.
Yeah.
Like it's gonna be all right.
Angie (39:29):
Yeah, because for a while for me, I would never have
believed that I was able to runa half marathon, and then I did
it and I became a halfmarathoner.
And then I said, I wonder if Icould be a sub two hour half
marathoner.
I wanted to be, have thatidentity, and that's very
numbers based.
You can't just decide you'regonna be, Like you, you can in a
way, right?
Because if you go by what we'vebeen talking about in this
(39:51):
episode, I had to decide that Iwas going to be, or that I was a
two hour marathon or halfmarathoner.
And then train in a way that asub two hour half marathoner
would train.
She would get up early, shewould fuel her body with good
nutrition.
She would strength train.
Like these are the things thatshe would do.
And that's really, that goesback to identity is a choice.
(40:13):
We have to make that choiceahead of time.
I had to start training that wayin order for me to have a chance
to get that result, which I thendid.
And then again, it's because, sothen that result and the.
reinforce the identity that Ihad already chosen for myself,
which was sub two hour halfmarathoner.
Kevin (40:31):
But you didn't have to wait for that, that, race
printout at the end of 1 50, 15, whatever the number is.
Afterwards, you had to
Angie (40:39):
accept 1 58, 59.
I know.
I think was my fir was my breaktwo hour.
Yes.
Yes, I was right there.
Yes it was.
Yeah.
Kevin (40:46):
but you didn't have to wait for that number.
You didn't, even standing on thestarting line.
You didn't have to wait twohours Yeah.
To be a sub two hour marathoner.
You had taken on, you hadadopted it, you had chosen that
identity months prior and thenput in the work to prove to
yourself that identity was infact Correct.
And even if you came across theline two minutes later as a 2 0
(41:07):
1 half marathoner did that too.
Angie (41:10):
I hit that time also.
It was after.
Because, and that's the thingtoo, is that your identity can
be fluid too.
Yeah.
and your results are also fluid.
And I did run a sub two hour,half marathon, and then I came
back and I ran a 2 0 1 afterwhat?
And I was like, wait a second.
I thought I was, and like thatwas a different race and I was
running that race for fun withfriends in Napa.
(41:32):
Not
Kevin (41:32):
a sub two hour, half marathoner.
Angie (41:34):
I know.
But it is funny that way, and Ithink that does happen to a lot
of people.
It's like they hit that goal andthen the next time they try it
and they don't achieve thatgoal, now it's all of a sudden
I'm questioning that thing.
It's no, it's just.
Didn't happen that day.
Yeah.
And that's
Kevin (41:46):
okay.
and, but that's the thing.
what if it doesn't happen thefirst time that you go for it
and what doesn't happen?
It didn't happen yet.
Yeah.
that's a thing.
You can still have that identityeven when the evidence in front
of you seems to be suggestingthe opposite.
It's not there yet.
Yeah.
it's just a process that you'regoing to, which is why you
always have to enjoy theprocess.
if you're not actually enjoyingthe journey to being sub two
(42:07):
hour on the half marathon Yeah.
Then are you really gonna enjoythe number on the clock when you
cross the finish line?
that's the thing.
Like you have to enjoy the stepsalong the way.
Angie (42:16):
Yeah.
Because that's what makes you arunner in the first place, or
that makes you whatever identityyou wanna step into.
Kevin (42:20):
Yeah.
A little weird.
Weird.
Angie (42:22):
it is a different way of thinking, and that's really why
we wanted to bring this podcast.
To you all today to just startgetting you thinking in this
direction of oh, wait, what?
Like I have to accept theidentity first.
I don't have to earn it.
I just get to choose it.
yes, it can be that simple, butthen you still have to do the
actions and the behaviors thatperson would do to then
(42:44):
reinforce that identity.
Because if you just choose anidentity and then you don't do
the things you're, there's, likeKevin said before, there's going
to be a disconnect in your brainand.
You're not gonna be able to holdonto that identity.
Kevin (42:55):
You either discard the identity or you have to start
doing the actions.
Which is why you have to sofully embrace the identity.
Because then that disconnectmakes you feel uncomfortable and
you start doing the actions.
Yeah.
If you're like, ah, yeah, Iidentify with this thing, but
then you don't do the actionsand the discomfort comes up,
you'll be like, eh, I guess I'mgonna discard that identity.
And that can be real, real easyif you're only lightly holding
(43:16):
onto the identity.
Angie (43:17):
Exactly.
So I hope this was helpful.
I would love to hear yourfeedback.
So if you haven't left us areview yet, please go ahead and
hit that five star review andleave us a little blurb of why
you liked this episode or shareit with a friend.
and if this episode did resonatewith you, I'd love for you to
join our five day runningchallenge coming up.
We start May 12th.
(43:38):
the registration for that willopen up the week before that.
So we're talking like probably,it'll probably open up either
somewhere between May.
First and May 5th.
so keep your eye out If youwanna get on our email list so
that you can be the first toknow when registration for that
is open.
You can go over to real liferunners.com and just scroll down
the page.
There's a place where you canenter your email just so that
you're on our mailing list, andwe'll be informed when, all of
(44:00):
our free trainings happen.
because I do free trainings allthe time, my goal is to get more
of this information out into theworld to help more people to
understand that.
There are different ways thatyou can choose to start looking
at your running and looking atyour training and different
things that you can do to startfeeling better and getting
stronger.
especially as we continue to getolder because all of us that's
(44:21):
happening every single day.
so head over to real liferunners.com, sign up for our
email list.
There.
we also have a bunch of freeresources and all sorts of fun
stuff, for you on the website.
And if you haven't startedfollowing us on Instagram yet, I
would love for you to send me aDM over at Real Life Runners on
Instagram, send me a d and tellme what you liked about this
episode as well.
And as always, thanks forspending this time with us.
(44:43):
This has been The Real LifeRunners podcast, episode number
407.
Now get out there and run yourlife.
Welcome to the Real Life Runners podcast, episode number
407.
Today we're continuing ourconversation about why running
is starting to feel different ifyou're a runner over 40, not
only just because you're usingoutdated strategies, but today
we're taking it one level deeperbecause if you don't change this
one thing that we talk abouttoday, there's no way that
you're going to get the resultsthat you're wanting.
(00:21):
So if that sounds interesting,stay tuned.
(00:51):
what's up runners?
Welcome back to the show today.
Kevin's with me.
Hello Kev.
Kevin (00:55):
Hello, Angie.
Angie (00:57):
Hello, Angie.
so today we're, continuing ourconversation about running as we
age, and this is one of thosethings that not a lot of people
like to talk about, but this isone of those things that's
literally happening every day.
We are getting older, but youcan change and you can.
Determine how you experienceaging as a runner from some of
(01:18):
the things that we've beentalking about over the past few
weeks.
And this is really just settingsome of the stage.
We've got some really excitingtrainings coming up.
Our five day challenge is comingback in May, so stay tuned for
that.
We're gonna be kicking that offMay 12th.
So mark your calendars and I'lllet you know when registration
is available for you to sign upfor our five day running
challenge.
(01:39):
It's coming back and it's gonnabe better than ever, but.
Over the last few weeks here onthe podcast, we've been talking
about outdated strategies.
So a couple episodes ago we weretalking about those things about
how our training and ournutrition need to change and
shift as we get older becauseour body's changing and so our
training needs to also, and theway that we are adapting.
(02:00):
All of this is changing, right?
Your body physiology isdifferent after 40 than it was
when you were in your twentiesand your thirties.
And so if you're still trying todo the same thing that you did,
then even if it worked for youare probably noticing that
things are different and you'renot getting the same results,
Kevin (02:14):
which is super unfortunate because it'd be
great if we could just keepdoing the same thing for year
upon year and just keep gettingphenomenal results out of it.
But that's just not the case.
And fighting against it is what?
That's a losing battle.
Angie (02:24):
It is.
And then last week, if youhaven't listened to last week's
episode, I highly suggest youpause this, come back to it and
go check out Cindy's story.
Because Cindy is a perfectexample of it's never too late
to start.
And as long as you do things ina way to honor your body, you
can run for as long as you wantand you can do all sorts of
(02:44):
things that you previouslythought were unattainable or n
maybe never even on your radaras long as you are.
Using the right strategy andhonoring your body.
Kevin (02:54):
Yeah.
I'm only partway into thatepisode.
I don't listen to the episodeswhere I have to hear my own
voice.
'cause I still, I can't standit.
Even though we've done 400 plusepisodes, you
Angie (03:02):
really can't stand your voice.
Kevin (03:03):
No.
Still can't.
I know.
Really.
I know.
We're this many episodes, wegotta work on that and all the
playback, it still drives menuts, but listening to just, I'm
only a little bit in,'cause I,I.
My run ended today.
but it's such a good episode.
You guys have to go back and ifyou've missed it, go back and
check out 4 0 6.
4 0 6.
That is such a good episode.
Angie (03:19):
Yes.
And so today we're going onelevel deeper because you guys
know we don't like to staysurface level around here.
And we can talk aboutstrategies, we can talk about
training, we can talk aboutnutrition, we can talk about all
of these things that are on thatsurface level, but.
But underlying all of that, ifwe ignore the underlying layer,
then those things, obviously,like you might start to see some
(03:42):
results, but you might not getthe full power of all of those
results.
And that thing that we'retalking about is your identity.
Your identity is how you seeyourself and how you.
See what's capable or whatyou're, what you are capable of,
like what you believe you arecapable of and what you think is
possible for you.
Because you can change yourplan, you can change your
(04:04):
workouts and your nutrition, butif your identity doesn't shift,
there's, you're always gonna beleaving something on the table.
And I know about this because Idid not use to think of myself
as a runner.
When I first started running, itwas simply to lose weight and
get in shape, and I was anathlete my whole life growing up
playing different sports andrunning was always punishment
and runners were always crazy'cause I couldn't understand how
(04:27):
someone would actually,genuinely enjoy.
I.
Just going out to run becauseespecially if there was no ball
involved, you're over herelaughing.
I,
Kevin (04:36):
I, because I got into running for literally the
opposite of that.
Yeah.
Like I, I got into runningbecause there, that's weird.
There were weird people whowanted to just go run and there
wasn't a ball involved.
I
Angie (04:45):
know.
It's the strangest thing to me.
When I first started running, itwas just a means to an end.
It was I wanted to have quoteunquote, the body of a runner,
and I thought running was goingto give that to me.
And then I met this crazy manstanding next to me and he liked
running just for running, and Idid not understand that, but he
was cute and he had dimples.
So I was like, okay, let mecheck this out and see if this
(05:07):
is something I could get into alittle bit, especially if it's
something that can help me stayin shape because I'm no longer a
part of.
An organized sports team.
And so for the longest time whenI was still out there running, I
still would not call myself arunner.
Yes, I ran, I did five Ks, I didother things, but I didn't think
of myself as a runner.
(05:28):
And I'm trying to think back andthink what, how I qualified my
definition of a runner and why Ididn't say that I was one.
And I'm not super clear on itbecause it was a very long time
ago, but I think that.
In some ways I felt like I hadto earn that title from a pace
or a distance.
(05:48):
And because I always saw Kevinas a runner and Kevin was much
faster than me, he enjoyedrunning more than I did and
would go out and run much longerthan I did.
So I was like, I'm none of thosethings, so I must not be a
runner.
And I don't think that this wason a conscious level.
I think all of that was on avery subconscious level.
Kevin (06:06):
Yeah, I'm sure that there was some comparison to me and
that was probably holding backyour.
Original adoption of I'm arunner because I was out there
doing, longer distances andfaster paces.
And so it's hard to not havethat immediate comparison.
Yeah.
'cause I helped spur you intothe whole running thing also.
Angie (06:22):
Yeah.
I think that one of my mainshifts I.
Really came when I started tosee running as a skill that
could be improved because for along time I didn't think that I
was a runner because I thoughtyou almost had to be born a
runner.
Like you're either good atrunning or you're not good at
running.
And I put myself as not good atrunning, so therefore I'm not a
(06:42):
runner.
Where I looked at people likeyou and saw how easily running
seemed to come for you, like youcould just go off and you loved
it and you were good at it andit.
That was never how I experiencedrunning.
So maybe that's how I wasdefining running was not only
are you good at it, but you alsoenjoy it.
And those are two things that Inever.
Considered myself, consideredtrue for me.
Kevin (07:04):
by the time you met me as a runner, I had already gone
through a whole running identitytransformation myself.
Oh
Angie (07:10):
really?
Kevin (07:11):
'cause I had, I ran in high school.
I was pretty good in highschool.
I walked on in college.
I was nowhere near as good asthe people that I was running
with.
I stopped running for a fewmonths.
And then I had to figure out howI wanted to run, but not be part
of an organized team, but stillrunning.
Oh yeah.
Like you flipped from being likea ball sport athlete and then
Running was gonna be like athing that you were doing, but
(07:31):
you were also doing likeintermural sports and other
things like that.
Yeah.
Like you still had otherathletic ventures.
I had to figure out how to run.
On my own, and that took a wholeidentity overhaul myself.
Angie (07:41):
yeah.
So we've both been through this.
Yeah.
And I think that's really goodbecause people listening you
listeners can hopefully identifywith either me or Kevin, because
that's really what we aretalking about today is how.
After 40, we really have tostart to shift our identity as a
runner.
And you are still a runner.
And this is really an importantthing that I want to hit home
(08:02):
before we move forward, which isyou are a runner if you run and
if you choose to take on thattitle.
And that's what one of thethings that I realized is that I
didn't have to.
Hit a certain time or hit acertain distance.
Becoming a runner was simply achoice to call myself one.
And once I made that choice tobecome a runner and to call
(08:22):
myself a runner, I then startedacting a lot more like a runner.
And I'm like, if I'm gonna be arunner, if I'm gonna call myself
a runner, then there's certainthings that I have to do because
in my mind, there's certainthings that runners do and they
go out and run and they try toget better and they try to get
faster.
And once I started to numberone, see running as a.
Skill that could be improved.
And then number two, actuallycall myself a runner Then.
(08:46):
I was able to start making allof these improvements that I
never would've imagined possiblefor myself.
And so if you're sitting therelistening to this and you don't
yet call yourself a runner, Iwould encourage you to start
there.
And I would encourage, or evenone step back, which is
understanding that running is askill that can be improved.
You're not born a runner or nota runner.
(09:07):
You're not born a good runner ornot a good runner.
You get to just decide.
You're gonna call yourself arunner and.
Then when you choose that, youthen start to do the things that
runners do.
So if you're thinking like, oh,I'm too slow to be a runner, or
I walk sometimes, or I've neverrun a race, or I only do five
Ks, or I don't look like arunner.
There's all these differentthoughts and beliefs that can
(09:30):
make us believe that we're not arunner.
And I think that this is areally big problem, and this is
one of the conversations thatKevin and I were just having
before we hit record.
Was that if you don't even quitebelieve that you're a runner
yet, you could still be tryingto prove that you are by doing
the things that you think realrunners quote unquote do.
(09:52):
Like pushing yourself reallyhard every day run, going out
and running more and more mileslike some of these mistakes are
these.
Old, outdated trainingstrategies that we've talked
about in past episodes thatwe'll touch on a little bit
today, but over training,pushing through pain, under
fueling yourself, restrictingcalories.
if you think that's what runnersdo and you're still trying to
(10:14):
prove to yourself that you're arunner, it's going to be very
easy to continue to fall intothose traps.
Kevin (10:19):
a hundred percent.
Let's go.
Like step by step down thesethoughts.
Do you have, I'm too slow.
So that means you're gonna goout and just push yourself way
too hard on all of your runs.
That's gonna be an issue.
I walk sometimes.
Maybe that's what you need to doto bring your heart rate back
down, to turn an easy run intoan easy run.
So if you're like, ah, if I walkever during my run, then I'm not
really a runner, so I just, Ican't.
Walk ever.
(10:39):
So now you're over training thatthing.
I've never run a race.
Great.
Signing up for race after race,but never actually giving
yourself time to train properlyfrom the race.
Yeah, that's gonna lead to awhole lot of disappointing race
results.
if you have these thoughts andthen you try to fight back and
really just push hard againstthem, it's setting you up for
not a great experience and thennot getting necessarily the
(10:59):
results that you want off ofthis.
So even though you're reallypushing and fighting for the,
the opposite of these phrases.
You are, you're using poorstrategies to try and get it.
And you can just simply say, I'ma runner because I'm going out
and running.
I am a runner.
I run, therefore I'm a runner.
And that's all you need.
Angie (11:16):
And so that's step one is to really claim that identity,
which most of you.
Can do right now without havingto prove or earn anything.
And then once you claim thatidentity, the question then
becomes, what kind of a runnerdo I want to be now?
So this next part applies to allof you, whether or not you
already think of yourself as arunner or whether or not that
(11:38):
last conversation made youslightly uncomfortable because
you're realizing that you don'tthink of yourself as a runner.
Choose right now to callyourself a runner because then
the rest of this conversationtoday will apply to you because
now you get to decide, now thatI am a runner, or those of you
that have been runners for 10,20, 30 years, you still get to
(11:59):
decide today what kind of arunner am I going to be moving
forward?
And this is where we really wantyou to start leaning into this
identity of real life runner orlifelong runner because your
identity.
Influences your decisions.
And this is why this is soimportant.
This is why we're going to godeeper on this and really hit
home.
'cause some people think tothemselves, this is just
(12:19):
semantics.
Like it doesn't really matterwhat I call yours, what I call
myself, but it definitely doesbecause your identity, who you
believe yourself to be.
Influences your decisions ontraining or running or taking a
rest day.
It influences your self-talk.
We all know that we have bothpositive and negative ways that
(12:39):
we talk to ourselves.
And who you believe yourself tobe and what you believe yourself
to be capable of is going toinfluence that level of
self-talk.
It's going to influence whatkind of goals you set for
yourself.
Whether you give yourselfpermission to try new things and
to fail and to keep going, or ifyou just choose to see yourself
as a failure and then quit.
All of these things areinfluenced by your identity.
Kevin (13:02):
I mean your identity.
People that suggest that it'ssemantics.
here's a setup for you.
Try and visualize this.
Your boss walks in'cause I, I'm.
Good friends with my boss also,I think if he is gonna have a
conversation with me and heopens it with Kevin, we need to
talk.
That's a very differentimmediate feeling that I go to
than, Hey Kev, can I talk toyou?
And he has called me by boththings, depending on the
(13:23):
particular conversation that weare about to have.
And one of them is much morelighthearted, And it is.
These that is my name.
And our name is so core to ouridentity, but having
conversations that opens withKevin, can we have a
conversation versus, Hey Kev,can we talk?
Is so it's semantics.
Yeah.
It's two letters it's in.
That's all it is.
(13:44):
But you can see that thedifference between the name
someone calls you is socritical.
So this is why the names that wecall ourselves.
Runner, not a runner.
Whatever adjective you wannathrow in front of runner once
you've fully adopted that you'rea runner is super critical to
every, all of the actions anddecisions that you're making
following that.
Angie (14:04):
Absolutely.
And I love that you point thatout because I think that a lot
of people can relate to that.
if you have a nickname, like mynickname is Angie, and I've been
Angie basically my entire life.
I actually had this conversationwith my mom the other day
because she was over here.
And, for, if you haven't beenfollowing me on Instagram, I
have been put.
Haven't been posting about it asmuch recently.
I need to post more about itbecause I just absolutely love
(14:27):
that.
My mom comes over three days aweek to work out with me now,
because for the longest time,we're talking years, I've tried
to get my mom to start workingout.
On a regular basis.
And finally I just said to her,mom, just come over to my house.
Come over to my house Monday,10:00 AM 11:00 AM whatever time
it was, and we'll just, we'll doa workout together.
We'll both work out.
I'll be there for you.
(14:48):
I'll instruct you, I'll, helpyou modify whatever is going on.
And we've been doing it this wayfor a couple of months now,
which has been so fantastic.
And so anyway, my mom was at myhouse the other day and I asked
her.
When did you start calling meAngie?
Because for a long time sheactually just brought over this
box.
this is what kind of spurredthis conversation.
So my mom brought over a boxlast week of old pictures'cause
(15:10):
she was going through picturesand stuff in her, the one closet
of her house and found all ofthese old pictures.
And so she separated all thesepictures into piles, like one
for me, one for my sister.
And so she brought over all thephotos of me and I was looking
through these photos and insideof that box also was a baby book
like.
The My Baby's first milestonesand I was slipping through that
(15:33):
and she referred to me as Angelain all of those things, and she
was writing about my firstChristmas and all of these
things, and how wonderful it isto have Angela here, and I
haven't gone by Angela.
I don't even know how long sinceI was little and I don't
remember really people callingme that ever.
And so I asked her, when did I.
Become Angie and she said prettyearly on in life.
(15:54):
And I said, okay.
I wasn't sure if it was like,when I actually had a say, did I
ask to be called Angie?
And then people started callingme that, or was it sooner than
that?
She said, no, it was earlierthan that.
And I.
So I know how it feels, and ifyou have a nickname, you
probably know this feeling aswell.
If someone calls you by yourformal name of Angela, there's
this disconnect that happens andI'm like, you either don't know
(16:18):
me at all, or you definitelydon't know me well enough to
know that I don't go by Angela.
I go by Angie, and I've alwaysbeen Angie.
And then there's people thatcall me Anang also, which I
love.
But.
That's this identity piece, of,immediately when someone calls
you by a certain name, thatmeans something.
So if someone calls me, Angela,I know you don't know me very
(16:40):
well at all, right?
If someone calls me Angie, thatmeans, okay, you clearly, you
know me well, or maybe not, butyou at least know enough to know
my real name.
To know what your name is,right?
To know my name.
Identity influences everything,and I think that's really
important because your identityspeaks to you on a subconscious
level.
It's not conscious.
sometimes it is, but it alsospeaks to you on a very
(17:01):
subconscious level.
Kevin (17:03):
Yeah.
So if someone comes up and says,hey fast runner, do you
immediately like wince at that?
Because I've said it to peopleon our cross country and track
team, I'm like, oh man, quitethe fast runner today.
And they're like, what are youkidding?
Like they, they immediately pushback over this.
Some of them will say thank you,and it's a matter of like, how
different does that phrase gowith the identity that they've
(17:23):
given themselves?
Angie (17:24):
So it's their own level of belief.
Kevin (17:26):
Yes.
And so'cause I look at a bunchof people and it's look, you're
pretty fast.
You go out.
you see these things, I dunno,for some reason in the last few
weeks, they're, they've hit myfeet on all the different social
medias of what is an average 5Ktime and an average marathon
time, like worldwide right now.
And it's oh, maybe you're fasterthan you think you are.
Or maybe you're closure toaverage than you think you are.
And it's, they're interestingthings to go out there.
But when you go up and tellsomebody who doesn't necessarily
(17:50):
categorize themselves as a fastrunner, and you're like, Hey,
looking really fast today.
It's very interesting to see theresponse that people get.
Because once you startclassifying yourself in
different categories withinrunner, that leads to different
decision making, differentactions.
Angie (18:05):
And isn't it interesting too, that you could go up and
say that to somebody and youcould intend it to be.
A compliment.
And if they don't have thatlevel of belief in themselves,
they could completely see thatas an insult.
Yeah.
As you making fun of them.
Yes.
Like really like that, that'ssarcasm.
Kevin (18:22):
Yeah.
and this is why I'm doing mybest to try to avoid sarcasm,
which is a lifelong process.
It is,
Angie (18:29):
it is.
And, but it's.
All goes back to who that personbelieves themselves to be.
Like your sentence and the wordsthat you say could be the same,
but the way that they interpretit is different based on their
own level of identity and theirown level of self-belief in that
statement.
Kevin (18:46):
Yeah.
Which is why words matter, butso does your own identity
because your identity is goingto affect how you hear the words
that you're saying to yourselfand the words that other people
are saying to you.
Angie (18:55):
So if you are still operating.
As a runner who believes thatmore is better, that thinner is
better, that in order for me toget better as a runner, I just
have to push harder and I'lljust keep pushing hard.
I'll rest later or I'll skiprest.
Then you are operating from thatoutdated identity because things
(19:15):
like that did work in yourtwenties and thirties like, and
it.
It depends on who you are andyour level of experience and all
sorts of different factors, butat some point those things stop
working and those are some ofthe things that we've been
talking about over the past fewweeks.
And all of those things go backto the identity of runner,
either the one that you'vealready accepted for yourself or
(19:38):
your belief.
What a runner should be, or whoa runner is, or what a runner
should be doing, because we allhave a different definition of
what a runner is or what a goodrunner is, and that's really
what we're asking you to startto question today and start to
look at a little bit differentlywhen it comes to.
Your old runner identity or yourold identity of maybe not a
(20:01):
runner to the new identity thatyou would like to step into.
And we're gonna give you guys acouple options and examples of
this.
And I would love for you to alsocome up with your own as you
listen to this podcast and asyou reflect on it afterwards.
To say, okay, how am Iidentifying and how am I
possibly operating from an oldidentity that is no longer
(20:24):
serving me?
Kevin (20:25):
Yeah.
I like the, the metaphor thatyou got here.
you said that trying to createnew results from an outdated
identity is like trying to pr inshoes that don't fit anymore.
I'd like to suggest that itmight also be like trying to pr
in shoes that don't have acarbon plate sometimes.
Sometimes things evolve and youhave to join the evolution or
you're just not going to be ableto produce at the same level
anymore.
Angie (20:45):
So you and I were just having this conversation last
week when I was looking at theBrooks website Yes.
At my shoes, and we were lookingat different racing shoes, and
you made that comment aboutracing flats and how you used.
To race.
Kevin (20:58):
There's not even a term called racing flats anymore.
Like Racing flats used to be soridiculously thin.
Underneath.
Yeah, because the foam was oneof the heavier parts of the
shoe.
Like you just try to make theshoes as light as possible in
order to do it.
They were just, they were hardto run on.
They took out a bunch of thefoam,'cause it made it lighter,
and so they called them flatsbecause they look like your
normal running shoes, butshorter and now.
(21:19):
Racing shoes.
There are shoes out there thatare, that pros can't race in
that you and I could go out andbuy, but they're illegal to try
and go out and set a record.
And they're illegal to go outand try and win prize money in
because the stack site stackheight is too high on them.
'cause it's just how muchspringy foam can we put
underneath?
And if we have the plate at theright angle, then we need to
mask it with enough squishy foamaround it that you're, you.
(21:41):
Aren't just in pain as you runthe whole thing.
Yeah, it's, yeah.
And that your Achilles doesn'tjust blow up on you.
that's a different conversationabout shoes, but let's not dive
into that one too much planter
Angie (21:49):
fascia as well.
So let's go over some possibleold identities and then the new
runner identity.
That you can choose to stepinto.
Because remember, your identityis a collection of your
thoughts, your actions, yourslash behaviors, and then the
results that you have.
Because all of the results thatyou have in your life stems from
(22:12):
the actions that you take, andyour actions come from the
thoughts and the beliefs thatyou have about yourself, which
all come from your identity.
So we're Moving this one stepbackwards, we, that's what we've
been doing over the past coupleof weeks.
we've talked about the results,we've talked about, the actions
and the behaviors.
Now we're taking it that stepback further to really get, dig
into some of those thoughts andbeliefs and then possibly the
(22:34):
identity behind those.
So if you have the idea of, Ihave to.
Earn the title of runner, thenyou might be going out ask
yourself, okay, if I believethat's true, what will that lead
me to do?
What kind of actions, if Ibelieve I have to earn this will
I do?
So a lot of runners, if theybelieve this, and I know this is
one of the things that Ibelieved when I was.
(22:56):
When I believed I wasn't arunner was that I just needed to
go out and push harder becauseobviously pushing harder was
going to make me faster, andthen if I was faster, then maybe
I could call myself a runner ormaybe people would see me that
way.
Kevin (23:09):
So then you've connected to earning the title based off
of a.
A number on a clock somewhere.
Which is a lot of what this isearning the title is a number on
a clock or the distance of arace that you've signed up to
run.
Or how long is your longesttraining run?
People put a number to thisthing.
And in order to get to whateverthat is, you have to push real
hard to get to it.
Yeah.
And often it leads to, I have topush all the time to get to it
(23:29):
as fast as possible.
'cause I really would like toearn that title.
Yeah.
Because we want it now.
Yes, we do.
So I'm going to go out and grindday upon day.
And will you.
You grind yourself into powder.
Angie (23:39):
And what if instead, like, how would your actions be
different if you decided I don'thave to earn the title, I just
choose to own it right now.
And in choosing this title formyself, in choosing to call
myself a runner, a real liferunner, a lifelong runner, that
means that I go out and I trainevery day.
(24:00):
And I would love to talk alittle bit too, a little on a
side note about the wordtraining because I was.
Talking to a friend of mine theother day and she was asking me,
do your, the people that you'retrying to reach and the people
that you're trying to help, dothey really call it training or
do they just call it running?
And I'm like, oh, that's areally good point.
Ooh, good one.
I love that idea.
(24:21):
And so as a little side note,you don't have to be training
for a race.
In order to call what you'redoing training.
I like to call it trainingbecause we are all working
towards a goal.
So yes, you can just go out andrun and if you're not working
towards any sort of goal,running would probably be a good
word for it.
(24:41):
But if you are trying to worktowards some goal, I love to
call it training, and I wouldlove to invite you to start
calling it training because whenyou start calling it training,
you think of yourself more as arunner and as an athlete, all of
a sudden, not only.
Do I go out and run, but now I'mtraining for something.
And again, it doesn't have to bea race.
It can be, I just want to feelbetter on my runs.
(25:04):
I just wanna be able to run alittle bit longer.
I wanna be able to walk lesswhen I go out and run.
All of those are goals thatyou're working toward, towards,
and all of those are very.
Worthwhile and valid goals thatmake you a runner because you're
using running as a tool to helpyou gain something in your life,
(25:24):
whether it's strength or betterhealth, or a PR or a new
distance, or breaking down andchallenging yourself.
Like breaking down an old beliefof I never thought I could do
this, and now I'm challengingmyself to be able to do this
thing.
You're training for something.
And so using the word trainingis a very powerful shift and
yes.
It's semantics, but you can seehow when we make that shift and
(25:47):
start using different words,that allows us to start thinking
about ourselves differently.
Kevin (25:52):
Yeah.
I'm gonna move to your next oneand then continue on this whole
training versus running idea.
'cause it goes right with thenext one.
Your outdated identity of I pushthrough pain versus a newer
identity of I train with wisdomand recovery.
You didn't say a run.
With wisdom and recovery.
I trained, I didn't go for a runyesterday, but that is part of
my training.
(26:13):
I literally planned to not havea run yesterday as part of an
overall training program.
Yes.
Not my running program, but mytraining program, yes.
Included that as an off day.
Like I did not have a hugeamount of physical activity
yesterday outside of a veryvigorous egg hunt.
but
Angie (26:29):
And cornhole game.
Kevin (26:30):
And a cornhole game.
Yeah.
I know.
I.
I had to limber up before thatone and get my shoulder ready
for it.
but it's a whole differentstory.
but it's a training involves allof your activities, whereas you
say, oh, running is just thissmall portion of a day.
And if you're not going for arun every day, and even at the
highest level, I would saysuggest taking an off day once a
(26:51):
week that.
Training can still happen onthat day.
Training happens throughout theday.
Training is not just this smallwindow where you lace up your
shoes.
Angie (27:00):
And that connects back to what we were saying before about
how you don't have to earn it.
Because if you think that onceyou hit a certain distance or a
certain time or some certainnumber, that in your head means
that you're a runner.
You don't acknowledge the wholeprocess that it took to get
there.
And by calling yourself arunner, now at the beginning,
(27:22):
you then can start toacknowledge the process as the
way for you to achieve the goal.
And it's going through thatprocess of, that's what actually
makes you into a runner.
It's going out for your runsseveral times per week.
It's putting in the strengthtraining and the mobility and
the rest, and the recovery daysand training in a way.
(27:43):
For your body to adapt and getstronger.
And if you just say, I'm not arunner until I hit that number,
then it completely ignores theentire process that was required
for you to get there, which isactually when you became a
runner overall.
Kevin (27:59):
Sure.
Yeah.
do you see what
Angie (28:01):
I'm saying?
Yeah.
Kevin (28:01):
you've, you are a runner 'cause you adopt the identity.
But then once you're doing, butyou still
Angie (28:05):
have to do things to re you still do
Kevin (28:06):
things to
Angie (28:06):
reinforce the identity.
Just get
Kevin (28:08):
in a shirt that says I'm a runner.
Doesn't count if you're sittingon the couch every day.
Angie (28:11):
Correct.
Like
Kevin (28:11):
that.
that's just a shirt.
Angie (28:12):
Exactly.
Like you can choose to bewhoever you are, but then.
After you choose your identity,you then have to do the actions
that reinforce that identity.
'cause it's a loop,
Kevin (28:22):
right?
Otherwise you get this weirddisconnect and you feel awkward.
But training with wisdom is alsoa good one.
This one I get up against whenI'm training the high school
kids all the time becausethey've got a lot of energy on
some days.
Some days they're exhaustedbecause they have three tests in
a day, but sometimes they have alot of energy.
And I'm like, all Here's ourworkout for the day and we're
doing eight reps of whatever thedistance is, and they finish it
(28:44):
and they're like, I'm not thattired.
Should we do a couple more?
I'm like, no, you're good.
And there's a wisdom involved inknowing that you don't have to
push yourself.
To a breaking point.
Yeah.
Even on a hard day, like a hardday doesn't mean that you
finish, it collapsed on theground.
that's not necessarily what youneed.
There is time where you shouldpush yourself.
You should try and stretchyourself a little bit.
(29:06):
pushing through pain is fine onoccasion.
It's not a day in mantra thatyou should adopt every single
time.
There needs to be a balance toyour training.
That's where the wisdom and theexperience comes in.
And listening to some guidancealong the way and being like,
all right, this is a day that Iwant to have a little bit still
left over at the end of it, it'sstill a good workout.
I'm still getting benefits fromthis, but I'm gonna be able to
(29:27):
come back and maintain theconsistency for the next day and
the next day, and the next day.
I.
Angie (29:32):
And so that's really then taking that long-term view over
what's possible for you as well,and understanding that I'm not
there yet.
And in order for me to getthere, I have to meet myself
where I am, and I have to trainin a way that's very smart so
that some days I can just goeasy and then other days I can
push myself a little bit harderbecause pushing outside of your
comfort zone.
(29:53):
Is what is going to help you getto the next level, but not if
you ignore recovery and not ifyou just keep pushing every
single day.
Because people hear this ideaof, you have to get outside your
comfort zone and you have topush beyond what you're
currently capable of if you wantto improve.
And that's true.
A little bit of the time.
Not every single time that yougo out for a run, not every
(30:15):
single time you go to the gym.
If you go to the gym and you tryto lift heavy and you try to PR
on every single time you lift,you are going to be injured in a
couple of weeks, maybe even bythe end of that week.
it depends on how much you'rereally doing there, but like
these are some of those outdatedstrategies that again, come from
that underlying identity of.
(30:35):
I'm not a runner yet, or I needto prove it, or I'm a slow
runner, or those types ofthings.
changing from this idea of, Ionly, it only counts if I'm fast
or I'm only a runner if I'm fastor I'm not worthwhile unless I'm
fast.
I know that kind of.
Sounds a little bit farfetched,but we might not say it that way
to our, to ourselves and ourheads, but we can be thinking
(30:57):
that on a subconscious level.
So instead of just thinkingabout speed, you wanna jump in
here?
Kevin (31:03):
Sometimes we do say that out loud.
Yeah.
It's like sometimes thattransition happens.
that happened to me.
when I was around 20.
Yeah.
Of, I'm not a runner'cause I'mnot fast.
it often had the word enoughthrown on the end of it.
Yeah.
but I wasn't, but I think
Angie (31:16):
that's what good.
Because not everyone says fast.
Just say fast enough.
Kevin (31:19):
Yeah.
Angie (31:20):
I'm not fast enough to keep up with those guys.
Kevin (31:22):
Suggesting that there's some barrier, there's some
number on, again, there's somenumber on a clock that
determines who counts and whodoesn't count.
Yeah.
And, especially as runners aremoving into their forties,
fifties, there's a number on aclock that might be harder to
hit than it was in your twentiesand thirties.
And so if at any point in timeyou've got that idea of, maybe
(31:42):
you fully embraced, I'm a runnernow because you hit whatever
that num arbitrary number wasthat you're like, oh, I did get
fast enough.
I'm a runner, but now thatnumber seems to be slipping
away.
Yeah.
That's a tricky identity.
That's a real tough one, becausemaybe you literally did overcome
this number you made.
Yeah.
And you said, I did it.
I can now call myself a runner.
(32:04):
But what if you don't have thatnumber anymore?
Angie (32:06):
because.
Ultimately it's going to slipaway at some point.
At some point, right?
Like it's just a matter of when,there is going to be a point in
every runner's journey that theystart, that they get slower
instead of faster, and thatthere is going to be a time
where you hit your last PR inthat distance.
And no, none of us know whenthat actually is, which is the
freaky part of it all.
(32:26):
It's like the last time, like meas a mom and having teenage
daughters right now, I have a15-year-old and a 12-year-old.
I think back, and you never knowwhen it's the last time that
you're going to give them abath, for example, or the last
time that you're going to strapthem into a car seat.
there's just certain things andcertain milestones that just
happen along the way that youdon't realize that's the last
(32:48):
time you're going to do thatthing.
And it's really hard later whenyou do realize that.
But that's why it's importantfor us to value every single day
in every single moment, in everysingle race, which is really.
That consistency and the energythat you're putting into your
running and your training andyour identity as a runner or
(33:10):
even just as a healthy person.
I think that's a big part of ittoo, whether you call yourself a
runner or not.
Hopefully, after listening tothis episode, every single
person will raise their handwhen asked if they're runners,
but.
Maybe you really identify as ahealthy person or you want to be
a healthy person.
You have to start callingyourself that now in order for
you to do the things that aregoing to then reinforce that
(33:32):
identity.
Like going back to the reasonthat I started running, I ran to
burn calories.
It was simply a numbers game.
It was calories in, caloriesout.
I ran to burn more calories andThe reason that I wanted to run
longer was so that I could burnmore calories.
And the reason that I wanted topush harder and run faster was
because then I could burn morecalories in less time.
(33:53):
And that was my whole mindset,like I really didn't care how
long I ran.
other than that.
Number in the calorie boxbecause then that meant that,
not that I could eat more, butthat, I could create this
calorie deficit so that I couldlose weight, which ultimately
ended up backfiring, didn'treally work anyways.
And that's what a lot of runnersin this phase of life are
(34:15):
finding as well, is that ifyou're continuing to operate by
that idea of I'm running to burncalories, or I'm running to burn
off my food, your metabolismstarts to shift after the age of
40 because of all the way that.
The ways that your hormones areshifting.
It changes how your body usesglucose and uses insulin and
your cortisol levels, like allof the hormones are changing.
(34:36):
And so if you just keep thinkingabout restricting calories and
burning more calories, it'sgoing to start backfiring.
And I've been talking to so manywomen.
Who are still operating withthis idea of I exercise to burn
calories and then I restrict myfood so that my numbers and my
balance is correct, and they arejust continuing to gain weight.
(34:58):
They have no energy.
They're cranky, they're moody,and they just feel awful.
They have no energy for anythingand it's because their body's
not being nourished andsupported.
And so the, your body justdoesn't have not only what it
needs.
To get better, but just to evenmaintain where you are right
now.
And so a lot of women startdeclining in this phase of life
(35:18):
because they're still stuck inthis calorie burn mindset.
Kevin (35:22):
Alright, Instead of I run to burn calories.
What mindset are you taking onThat's a better frame off of
that one.
Something connected more towardshealthy.
Angie (35:30):
Yes, and strong.
Like I now value myself as astrong person, as a strong
runner.
Like I run to get stronger and Iuse running as really, I.
A part of my overall healthplan.
So my whole goal is to staystrong and actually to get
stronger.
I'm not just trying to maintainat this point in my life, I'm
trying to actually buildstrength and build endurance,
(35:53):
and it's also just a way for meto feel more alive and more
connected and to move my bodyand to honor my body and to
really.
Celebrate what my body's able todo.
And so instead of just thinkingabout burning calories, I am
seen running as a way that I cancontinue to get stronger, both
mentally and physically.
Kevin (36:10):
that's a much healthier approach towards, health, shall
we say.
Angie (36:14):
Yeah.
and it also allows me to.
on those days to honor my bodywhere I need rest today.
I, because I know that if I goout and I push myself, I'm
really just gonna be breaking mybody down even more and leaving
my body even more depleted,which is going to affect me
negatively in the long run.
Kevin (36:31):
they're all so connected that is the wisdom that you
train with.
Instead of pushing through pain,pushing through exhaustion, you
train with the wisdom that helpsmaintain your value of
consistency, that gives you theappropriate energy that then
leads to health.
It's interesting to me that youstarted getting into it to be
healthier.
Then you.
You got so focused on thenumbers, details.
And then you kinda were like,let's ignore the number detail
(36:53):
and just focus on the healthyaspect of it.
Yeah.
Like I got into running becauseI thought it was fun, and then I
got so bogged down in numbers ona clock.
Yeah.
And then I stopped being soworried about numbers on a
clock.
I still find them interesting.
I still like to keep track ofthem.
I'm so much more focused onrunning for the fun aspect of
it.
It goes back to, I think itoften goes back to where we came
(37:14):
in.
it's just a new evolution ofthat sort of framing that got us
into running in the first place.
Angie (37:20):
I really love that idea that it's almost like a
pendulum.
Pendulum swinging, right?
Like we started here, we swungover here for a while and now
we're coming back, but we'redoing it much more wise.
Wiser and with more intentionthat we're bringing into it?
Yes.
Kevin (37:35):
Far more intention.
Angie (37:36):
Yeah, because I think that's really what we can start
to hang onto is as we get olderand we start to embrace this
identity of a lifelong runner ora real life runner, that's not
something that fades with age.
It doesn't matter if my times.
Get slower because that's notwhat running is about for me
anymore.
yes, it's still fun to chasetimes.
It's still fun to go out and dospeed sessions and to go out and
(37:59):
sign up for races and see whereyou are right now.
And all of that is still fun andthat, and if you love.
Numbers, and you're a runnerthat likes the numbers.
I'm not telling you to get ridof that, like by all means, but
just decide what those numbersmean because we can attach
whatever meaning to thosenumbers that we want.
And so if you decide to take onthis identity of a lifelong
(38:21):
runner.
It's using your running and yourtraining as something that's
going to help you to getstronger and to help you
continue to grow as a person, tocontinue to help you stay
stronger.
just as a human and, That'snever gonna go away.
Kevin (38:36):
Yeah.
No, it's the lifelong healthyapproach, which you've adopted
for years now, and I think thatit's a constantly evolving thing
and sometimes you think thatyou've evolved past it.
you pointed out that if youwanna stick with the numbers,
you can hang on to some of thesenumbers, but just.
Make sure that none of them havetoo sticky of a connection to
your identity.
Yeah.
Like I know there's stillnumbers in my head that they're
(38:58):
gonna pop up that I'm like, oh,I'm not sure if I can hit that
number anymore and that might bean uncomfortable, day for me.
Yeah.
When that thing shows up.
'cause I'm like, oh, I didn'tthink that number meant anything
to me.
But apparently it does.
there's going to be.
Times just because you're like,oh, no, I've evolved.
I've got a more mature outlookon this thing.
It's gonna be fine.
There may still be things thatshow up sometimes, and that's
(39:18):
okay.
Yeah.
Like it doesn't have to beperfect all the time.
Sometimes new things come up andyou're like, oh, I thought I'd
moved past that part of myidentity.
Yeah.
Apparently I'm going to facethat right now.
Yeah.
Like it's gonna be all right.
Angie (39:29):
Yeah, because for a while for me, I would never have
believed that I was able to runa half marathon, and then I did
it and I became a halfmarathoner.
And then I said, I wonder if Icould be a sub two hour half
marathoner.
I wanted to be, have thatidentity, and that's very
numbers based.
You can't just decide you'regonna be, Like you, you can in a
way, right?
Because if you go by what we'vebeen talking about in this
(39:51):
episode, I had to decide that Iwas going to be, or that I was a
two hour marathon or halfmarathoner.
And then train in a way that asub two hour half marathoner
would train.
She would get up early, shewould fuel her body with good
nutrition.
She would strength train.
Like these are the things thatshe would do.
And that's really, that goesback to identity is a choice.
(40:13):
We have to make that choiceahead of time.
I had to start training that wayin order for me to have a chance
to get that result, which I thendid.
And then again, it's because, sothen that result and the.
reinforce the identity that Ihad already chosen for myself,
which was sub two hour halfmarathoner.
Kevin (40:31):
But you didn't have to wait for that, that, race
printout at the end of 1 50, 15, whatever the number is.
Afterwards, you had to
Angie (40:39):
accept 1 58, 59.
I know.
I think was my fir was my breaktwo hour.
Yes.
Yes, I was right there.
Yes it was.
Yeah.
Kevin (40:46):
but you didn't have to wait for that number.
You didn't, even standing on thestarting line.
You didn't have to wait twohours Yeah.
To be a sub two hour marathoner.
You had taken on, you hadadopted it, you had chosen that
identity months prior and thenput in the work to prove to
yourself that identity was infact Correct.
And even if you came across theline two minutes later as a 2 0
(41:07):
1 half marathoner did that too.
Angie (41:10):
I hit that time also.
It was after.
Because, and that's the thingtoo, is that your identity can
be fluid too.
Yeah.
and your results are also fluid.
And I did run a sub two hour,half marathon, and then I came
back and I ran a 2 0 1 afterwhat?
And I was like, wait a second.
I thought I was, and like thatwas a different race and I was
running that race for fun withfriends in Napa.
(41:32):
Not
Kevin (41:32):
a sub two hour, half marathoner.
Angie (41:34):
I know.
But it is funny that way, and Ithink that does happen to a lot
of people.
It's like they hit that goal andthen the next time they try it
and they don't achieve thatgoal, now it's all of a sudden
I'm questioning that thing.
It's no, it's just.
Didn't happen that day.
Yeah.
And that's
Kevin (41:46):
okay.
and, but that's the thing.
what if it doesn't happen thefirst time that you go for it
and what doesn't happen?
It didn't happen yet.
Yeah.
that's a thing.
You can still have that identityeven when the evidence in front
of you seems to be suggestingthe opposite.
It's not there yet.
Yeah.
it's just a process that you'regoing to, which is why you
always have to enjoy theprocess.
if you're not actually enjoyingthe journey to being sub two
(42:07):
hour on the half marathon Yeah.
Then are you really gonna enjoythe number on the clock when you
cross the finish line?
that's the thing.
Like you have to enjoy the stepsalong the way.
Angie (42:16):
Yeah.
Because that's what makes you arunner in the first place, or
that makes you whatever identityyou wanna step into.
Kevin (42:20):
Yeah.
A little weird.
Weird.
Angie (42:22):
it is a different way of thinking, and that's really why
we wanted to bring this podcast.
To you all today to just startgetting you thinking in this
direction of oh, wait, what?
Like I have to accept theidentity first.
I don't have to earn it.
I just get to choose it.
yes, it can be that simple, butthen you still have to do the
actions and the behaviors thatperson would do to then
(42:44):
reinforce that identity.
Because if you just choose anidentity and then you don't do
the things you're, there's, likeKevin said before, there's going
to be a disconnect in your brainand.
You're not gonna be able to holdonto that identity.
Kevin (42:55):
You either discard the identity or you have to start
doing the actions.
Which is why you have to sofully embrace the identity.
Because then that disconnectmakes you feel uncomfortable and
you start doing the actions.
Yeah.
If you're like, ah, yeah, Iidentify with this thing, but
then you don't do the actionsand the discomfort comes up,
you'll be like, eh, I guess I'mgonna discard that identity.
And that can be real, real easyif you're only lightly holding
(43:16):
onto the identity.
Angie (43:17):
Exactly.
So I hope this was helpful.
I would love to hear yourfeedback.
So if you haven't left us areview yet, please go ahead and
hit that five star review andleave us a little blurb of why
you liked this episode or shareit with a friend.
and if this episode did resonatewith you, I'd love for you to
join our five day runningchallenge coming up.
We start May 12th.
(43:38):
the registration for that willopen up the week before that.
So we're talking like probably,it'll probably open up either
somewhere between May.
First and May 5th.
so keep your eye out If youwanna get on our email list so
that you can be the first toknow when registration for that
is open.
You can go over to real liferunners.com and just scroll down
the page.
There's a place where you canenter your email just so that
you're on our mailing list, andwe'll be informed when, all of
(44:00):
our free trainings happen.
because I do free trainings allthe time, my goal is to get more
of this information out into theworld to help more people to
understand that.
There are different ways thatyou can choose to start looking
at your running and looking atyour training and different
things that you can do to startfeeling better and getting
stronger.
especially as we continue to getolder because all of us that's
(44:21):
happening every single day.
so head over to real liferunners.com, sign up for our
email list.
There.
we also have a bunch of freeresources and all sorts of fun
stuff, for you on the website.
And if you haven't startedfollowing us on Instagram yet, I
would love for you to send me aDM over at Real Life Runners on
Instagram, send me a d and tellme what you liked about this
episode as well.
And as always, thanks forspending this time with us.
(44:43):
This has been The Real LifeRunners podcast, episode number
407.
Now get out there and run yourlife.
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
Ridiculous History
History is beautiful, brutal and, often, ridiculous. Join Ben Bowlin and Noel Brown as they dive into some of the weirdest stories from across the span of human civilization in Ridiculous History, a podcast by iHeartRadio.