February 25, 2025 • 16 mins
Can love endure the test of time? Join us on Real People, Real Life as we uncover the secrets to a 63-year-long marriage with our delightful guest, Nancy. In a candid conversation, Nancy shares the wisdom and principles that have sustained her and her husband Gerald's enduring partnership. Against the backdrop of today's declining marriage rates and negative societal perceptions, Nancy offers a refreshing perspective rooted in mutual respect, kindness, and unwavering support. Her heartfelt advice and insights, drawn from personal experiences and faith, provide a beacon of hope and guidance for both newlyweds and seasoned couples navigating the complexities of committed relationships.
Throughout our discussion, Nancy opens up about the challenges and rewards of marriage, offering practical tips inspired by her own journey and biblical teachings. She passionately addresses the roles and responsibilities within a marriage, emphasizing the importance of communication and understanding. Nancy's story is more than just a testament to love; it’s an invitation to listeners to rediscover the beauty and potential of partnership. Whether you're married, considering marriage, or simply intrigued by stories of enduring love, Nancy's words of wisdom are sure to resonate and inspire.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to Real People, real Life, where
everyday conversations lead toextraordinary insights.
We're all about digging intothe lives of regular people
who've achieved success on theirown terms.
From business andentrepreneurship to fitness,
politics, education and beyondwe cover it all.
(00:24):
This is Real People, real Life.
And now your host, ryan Sherow.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Well, good morning Nancy, good morning Ryan.
Thank you for taking the time.
We've actually enjoyed ourvisit here with you.
Thank you for opening up yourhouse.
Your generosity is alwaysamazing.
Hello there, copper, you wantto be part of the show.
So one of the things we talkedwith Gerald yesterday, your
wonderful husband, and I wantedto talk to you today about
(00:55):
something that's happening inAmerica pretty much, is marriage
rates are down significantlyand people, especially young men
, are not considering marriageup into their late 20s, early
30s, if at all, and part of thereason is divorce rates are so
(01:18):
high and so many people look atmarriage as they've been sold it
, as a terrible thing orsomething that is going to give
you problems in life andheadaches.
It's going to end up in divorce, they're going to lose all your
money, and so all this negativeinformation has been thrown at
young people and they prettymuch are steering clear from
(01:41):
marriage.
You and Gerald have beenmarried, going to be going on 63
years.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
Correct.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
What's the secret?
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Well, I attribute the secret to having respect for
one another, for one another,not taking each other for
granted and always being kind toone another and good to one
another.
(02:12):
And I've written something fornewlyweds.
I had a friend that her son wasgetting married and they knew
that Gerald and I had beenmarried for a long time married.
And they knew that Gerald and Ihad been married for a long
time and she thought it would benice for me to sit down and
write how that we've been ableto stay married for so long.
(02:33):
So I told her I would, and so Icame up with this letter that I
wrote and it says that we wouldlike to congratulate both of
you on your marriage.
So many young people havedecided to live together instead
of marriage, no commitments,which is not God's plan.
(02:55):
Your wedding vows probably saidfor better or worse, richer or
poorer, in sickness and inhealth, and to be faithful to
each other until death.
Do you part.
Hopefully that's a very longtime.
God's word in Ephesians 6, 31says For that cause shall a man
(03:15):
leave his father and mother andshall be joined unto his wife,
and the two shall be one flesh,wife, and the two shall be one
flesh.
Ephesians 6.25 says Husbandslove your wives, even as Christ
also loved the church and gavehimself for it.
Ephesians 6.28 says so oughtmen to love their wives as their
(03:38):
own bodies, that he that lovethhis wife loveth himself.
When husbands love their wives,he does not put her down, abuse
her, talk down to her or screamand degrade her.
Ephesians 6.22 says Wives,submit yourselves unto your own
husband as unto the Lord.
(04:00):
Wives need to remember that youare a help, lord.
Wives need to remember that youare a help.
Support, respect and encourageyour husband in all things.
Submit does not mean being putdown and walked on or being meek
and mild.
However, you need to rememberthat your husband is under a lot
(04:21):
of extra stress andresponsibility to provide and
care for his wife and herwell-being, as well as the
children that might come along.
He is responsible for makingsure his wife is safe and cared
for, as well as housing and herspiritual growth.
Wives have the responsibilityof making sure the household is
(04:45):
well maintained.
The wife sets the tone of calmor confusion, so it's important
to strive to have a calmingatmosphere for your husband to
come home to after a long day atwork and prepare well-balanced
meals, balanced meals for herfamily.
Ephesians 6.23 says For thehusband is the head of the wife,
(05:08):
even as Christ is the head ofthe church.
Our former pastor's wife usedto say that he is the head, but
she was the neck that turned thehead.
Now I would like to give you alittle background on our lives
together and how we have beenable to have a long and
(05:31):
wonderful married life together.
Gerald and I have been happilymarried for 62 years.
June 9th it'll be 63 years.
We were childhood sweetheartsand met when Gerald was 14 and I
was 12.
We lived in the sameneighborhood.
Gerald quit school in the eighthgrade.
(05:53):
He was the only eighth gradershaving and driving at 16.
So he got his mother to signfor him to join the Army His
choice.
He served for three years andthree months.
He got his education and hisGED while he was in the Army.
(06:29):
He got out of.
I was in DCT, which is a workprogram.
I worked half a day at a bank.
I was 18 years old when wemarried.
I graduated on June the 5th andwe got married June the 9th
1962.
We had a big, beautiful churchwedding but no money or time for
(06:52):
a honeymoon because Gerald hadbeen sick just before the
wedding.
So we stopped at a Burger King.
Everyone had written justmarried all over the car.
So you can imagine all thelooks and the comments that we
got when Gerald went in to getour hamburgers and the comments
that we got when Gerald went into get our hamburgers.
(07:13):
We got our Whoppers and went toour apartment we had rented to
live in.
I'm not going to tell you thatit's been a bed of roses all the
time.
With those beautiful, rosescome thorns and difficult times.
Roses come thorns in difficulttimes.
(07:34):
However, you need to go intomarriage, your marriage with the
knowledge that this union is awork in progress and needs work
daily.
Nothing that is worth anythingcomes easy.
Go into your marriage life withlove, respect for each other
and a commitment to staytogether.
Never, ever, make fun orcriticize your mate in public,
(07:59):
in front of friends or family.
Always be encouraging andlifting up each other.
If there is something negativeyou need to discuss, this can be
done between the two of you,behind closed doors.
Never go to bed mad.
(08:23):
Talk it out and resolve theproblem that day.
Don't wait until later andnever walk out mad.
Agree to disagree.
Watch how you discuss theproblem.
Watch what you say, because youcan't take those hurtful words
back once they are said out loud.
You both may forgive, but youwill never forget.
It's like putting nails in afence you can pull the nails out
(08:47):
, but the holes are still there.
Fence, you can pull the nailsout, but the holes are still
there.
Never take each other forgranted.
Life will get complicated andhumdrum Same old thing day after
day.
You should make a specialeffort to make things exciting
for each other, keep each otherwondering what unexpected
pleasure or activity is next.
(09:10):
These don't always have to besomething big or expensive, just
a love note handwritten indifferent places, or a simple
unexpected hug and kiss with thewords whispered do you know how
much I love and respecteverything you do for me?
Do you know how much I love andrespect everything you do for
me?
You can't imagine how specialthis will make each other feel.
(09:35):
Some great advice that was givento Gerald and I was to wait
five years before we started ourfamily.
This would give us time toenjoy each other and get to know
each other, because once thefamily starts, it's all about
the kids.
We would leave after work onFridays and just drive somewhere
(09:58):
different.
We always kept a pair ofunderwear and a toothbrush and
toothpaste in the glove box ofour little Volkswagen, and so
we'd just take off and go.
We'd come back in time to go towork on Monday.
We didn't have any dogs orresponsibilities, so we were
free to go and do as we pleased.
(10:18):
It was wonderful and we enjoyedthat time together.
Our first daughter was borneight years later and we were
ready to settle down and enjoy.
Our children Always kiss eachother goodbye and welcome home
like it might be the last timethat you ever see them, and
welcome home like it might bethe last time that you ever see
them.
(10:38):
Continue holding hands, beingaffectionate with each other and
tell each other I love you eachday.
Gerald always likes to tease bytelling me that he takes me with
him everywhere he goes so hedoesn't have to kiss me goodbye
and also he likes to say I toldyou I loved you when I got
(11:01):
married and he would let me knowif anything changed.
He is so bad but I love hissense of humor and he is full of
it.
Never a dull moment with GeraldBrown.
May God bless your union andremember to put God first in
(11:23):
your relationship.
Stay in his will and he willdirect your path.
It's important to remember thatthrough the years of raising a
family and differentcircumstances in life, your
likes and interests will change.
Grow and change together andnot in different directions,
(11:45):
because when you are old andalone, you still need to be
interested in the same thingsand enjoy spending time and
interest together and intereststogether.
It is so easy, if you're notcareful, to develop separate
interests.
Then, when you have nothing incommon and not enjoying spending
(12:06):
time together, when thishappens, you will probably want
to go your separate ways.
Don't give up.
Rekindle the fire and recommitto your vows and grow together
again.
It's never too late to honoryour vows.
I realize this is a lot ofinformation to take in right now
(12:29):
because you are newlyweds andall is new and well.
Keep this letter handy and readover it time to time in order
to see how you're doing.
Our prayers for you is that Godwill bless your marriage many,
many years.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
That's beautiful.
Keep it simple.
Keep it simple, live for theother person Right and show them
the respect and love instead ofbeing selfish.
I think we have complicated.
These generations havecomplicated things so much and
(13:09):
to the point where marriage is ascary thing, something that
they don't want to do.
Yeah, and they can take a biglesson on keeping it simple.
Success is all you need to see.
In 62, going on 63 years andI've seen it personally.
My wife has seen it personallythe level of love and respect
(13:30):
you guys are like newlyweds.
Gerald still loves you.
He sees you as his girlfriend.
His eyes light up when he seesyou and you know, like anything
in life, like you said, there'shard work, there's good times,
there's bad times and peopleneed not give up so quick in
(13:51):
everything.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
And it's so easy to do.
I mean, you get mad and you sayhurtful things and then it goes
bad to worse.
But you just need to workthrough it and not give up.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Pete, yeah, people have pushed back so hard over
the last few generations ontraditional marriage,
traditional values.
But it works.
You can push back all you want,but put God first in your life,
put your husband and wife firstin your life, fight together
(14:27):
through the hard times, findcommon ground.
Don't go to bed angry and keepit.
I said it again keep it simple.
It doesn't have to becomplicated.
Life will throw enoughcomplications at you to where
you don't need to add to it,right?
Well, I think that is.
(14:49):
That's a wonderful story, andpeople are going to hopefully
take that to heart and play itover and over again.
Hopefully thousands, if notmillions, of people will hear it
.
And have a happy marriage andmake their marriage happy.
Well, thank you, nancy.
That was really what I wantedto talk to you about, and I
(15:10):
wanted to get that letter outthere for everybody.
This will be short and sweet,but all the proof is there.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Yep.
We're still together, stillgoing strong.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Well, we'll do this again at 70 years.
Okay, all right, sounds good.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Well, thank you, you're welcome.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
All right.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
It's been a pleasure.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
You've been listening to Real People, Real Life.
Our passion is to have realconversations with real people
who've made it.
Real people who've made it, whodid it on their own terms.
Plus, we talk about business,fitness, politics, education.
Plus we don't shy away from ourthoughts on the controversial
(15:50):
issues of the day.
So if it's happening, you'llhear it here.
We'll be back soon, but in themeantime, catch us on Twitter or
X at RPRL podcast and onYouTube at real people, real
life podcast.
Welcome to Real People, real Life, where
everyday conversations lead toextraordinary insights.
We're all about digging intothe lives of regular people
who've achieved success on theirown terms.
From business andentrepreneurship to fitness,
politics, education and beyondwe cover it all.
(00:24):
This is Real People, real Life.
And now your host, ryan Sherow.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Well, good morning Nancy, good morning Ryan.
Thank you for taking the time.
We've actually enjoyed ourvisit here with you.
Thank you for opening up yourhouse.
Your generosity is alwaysamazing.
Hello there, copper, you wantto be part of the show.
So one of the things we talkedwith Gerald yesterday, your
wonderful husband, and I wantedto talk to you today about
(00:55):
something that's happening inAmerica pretty much, is marriage
rates are down significantlyand people, especially young men
, are not considering marriageup into their late 20s, early
30s, if at all, and part of thereason is divorce rates are so
(01:18):
high and so many people look atmarriage as they've been sold it
, as a terrible thing orsomething that is going to give
you problems in life andheadaches.
It's going to end up in divorce, they're going to lose all your
money, and so all this negativeinformation has been thrown at
young people and they prettymuch are steering clear from
(01:41):
marriage.
You and Gerald have beenmarried, going to be going on 63
years.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
Correct.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
What's the secret?
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Well, I attribute the secret to having respect for
one another, for one another,not taking each other for
granted and always being kind toone another and good to one
another.
(02:12):
And I've written something fornewlyweds.
I had a friend that her son wasgetting married and they knew
that Gerald and I had beenmarried for a long time married.
And they knew that Gerald and Ihad been married for a long
time and she thought it would benice for me to sit down and
write how that we've been ableto stay married for so long.
(02:33):
So I told her I would, and so Icame up with this letter that I
wrote and it says that we wouldlike to congratulate both of
you on your marriage.
So many young people havedecided to live together instead
of marriage, no commitments,which is not God's plan.
(02:55):
Your wedding vows probably saidfor better or worse, richer or
poorer, in sickness and inhealth, and to be faithful to
each other until death.
Do you part.
Hopefully that's a very longtime.
God's word in Ephesians 6, 31says For that cause shall a man
(03:15):
leave his father and mother andshall be joined unto his wife,
and the two shall be one flesh,wife, and the two shall be one
flesh.
Ephesians 6.25 says Husbandslove your wives, even as Christ
also loved the church and gavehimself for it.
Ephesians 6.28 says so oughtmen to love their wives as their
(03:38):
own bodies, that he that lovethhis wife loveth himself.
When husbands love their wives,he does not put her down, abuse
her, talk down to her or screamand degrade her.
Ephesians 6.22 says Wives,submit yourselves unto your own
husband as unto the Lord.
(04:00):
Wives need to remember that youare a help, lord.
Wives need to remember that youare a help.
Support, respect and encourageyour husband in all things.
Submit does not mean being putdown and walked on or being meek
and mild.
However, you need to rememberthat your husband is under a lot
(04:21):
of extra stress andresponsibility to provide and
care for his wife and herwell-being, as well as the
children that might come along.
He is responsible for makingsure his wife is safe and cared
for, as well as housing and herspiritual growth.
Wives have the responsibilityof making sure the household is
(04:45):
well maintained.
The wife sets the tone of calmor confusion, so it's important
to strive to have a calmingatmosphere for your husband to
come home to after a long day atwork and prepare well-balanced
meals, balanced meals for herfamily.
Ephesians 6.23 says For thehusband is the head of the wife,
(05:08):
even as Christ is the head ofthe church.
Our former pastor's wife usedto say that he is the head, but
she was the neck that turned thehead.
Now I would like to give you alittle background on our lives
together and how we have beenable to have a long and
(05:31):
wonderful married life together.
Gerald and I have been happilymarried for 62 years.
June 9th it'll be 63 years.
We were childhood sweetheartsand met when Gerald was 14 and I
was 12.
We lived in the sameneighborhood.
Gerald quit school in the eighthgrade.
(05:53):
He was the only eighth gradershaving and driving at 16.
So he got his mother to signfor him to join the Army His
choice.
He served for three years andthree months.
He got his education and hisGED while he was in the Army.
(06:29):
He got out of.
I was in DCT, which is a workprogram.
I worked half a day at a bank.
I was 18 years old when wemarried.
I graduated on June the 5th andwe got married June the 9th
1962.
We had a big, beautiful churchwedding but no money or time for
(06:52):
a honeymoon because Gerald hadbeen sick just before the
wedding.
So we stopped at a Burger King.
Everyone had written justmarried all over the car.
So you can imagine all thelooks and the comments that we
got when Gerald went in to getour hamburgers and the comments
that we got when Gerald went into get our hamburgers.
(07:13):
We got our Whoppers and went toour apartment we had rented to
live in.
I'm not going to tell you thatit's been a bed of roses all the
time.
With those beautiful, rosescome thorns and difficult times.
Roses come thorns in difficulttimes.
(07:34):
However, you need to go intomarriage, your marriage with the
knowledge that this union is awork in progress and needs work
daily.
Nothing that is worth anythingcomes easy.
Go into your marriage life withlove, respect for each other
and a commitment to staytogether.
Never, ever, make fun orcriticize your mate in public,
(07:59):
in front of friends or family.
Always be encouraging andlifting up each other.
If there is something negativeyou need to discuss, this can be
done between the two of you,behind closed doors.
Never go to bed mad.
(08:23):
Talk it out and resolve theproblem that day.
Don't wait until later andnever walk out mad.
Agree to disagree.
Watch how you discuss theproblem.
Watch what you say, because youcan't take those hurtful words
back once they are said out loud.
You both may forgive, but youwill never forget.
It's like putting nails in afence you can pull the nails out
(08:47):
, but the holes are still there.
Fence, you can pull the nailsout, but the holes are still
there.
Never take each other forgranted.
Life will get complicated andhumdrum Same old thing day after
day.
You should make a specialeffort to make things exciting
for each other, keep each otherwondering what unexpected
pleasure or activity is next.
(09:10):
These don't always have to besomething big or expensive, just
a love note handwritten indifferent places, or a simple
unexpected hug and kiss with thewords whispered do you know how
much I love and respecteverything you do for me?
Do you know how much I love andrespect everything you do for
me?
You can't imagine how specialthis will make each other feel.
(09:35):
Some great advice that was givento Gerald and I was to wait
five years before we started ourfamily.
This would give us time toenjoy each other and get to know
each other, because once thefamily starts, it's all about
the kids.
We would leave after work onFridays and just drive somewhere
(09:58):
different.
We always kept a pair ofunderwear and a toothbrush and
toothpaste in the glove box ofour little Volkswagen, and so
we'd just take off and go.
We'd come back in time to go towork on Monday.
We didn't have any dogs orresponsibilities, so we were
free to go and do as we pleased.
(10:18):
It was wonderful and we enjoyedthat time together.
Our first daughter was borneight years later and we were
ready to settle down and enjoy.
Our children Always kiss eachother goodbye and welcome home
like it might be the last timethat you ever see them, and
welcome home like it might bethe last time that you ever see
them.
(10:38):
Continue holding hands, beingaffectionate with each other and
tell each other I love you eachday.
Gerald always likes to tease bytelling me that he takes me with
him everywhere he goes so hedoesn't have to kiss me goodbye
and also he likes to say I toldyou I loved you when I got
(11:01):
married and he would let me knowif anything changed.
He is so bad but I love hissense of humor and he is full of
it.
Never a dull moment with GeraldBrown.
May God bless your union andremember to put God first in
(11:23):
your relationship.
Stay in his will and he willdirect your path.
It's important to remember thatthrough the years of raising a
family and differentcircumstances in life, your
likes and interests will change.
Grow and change together andnot in different directions,
(11:45):
because when you are old andalone, you still need to be
interested in the same thingsand enjoy spending time and
interest together and intereststogether.
It is so easy, if you're notcareful, to develop separate
interests.
Then, when you have nothing incommon and not enjoying spending
(12:06):
time together, when thishappens, you will probably want
to go your separate ways.
Don't give up.
Rekindle the fire and recommitto your vows and grow together
again.
It's never too late to honoryour vows.
I realize this is a lot ofinformation to take in right now
(12:29):
because you are newlyweds andall is new and well.
Keep this letter handy and readover it time to time in order
to see how you're doing.
Our prayers for you is that Godwill bless your marriage many,
many years.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
That's beautiful.
Keep it simple.
Keep it simple, live for theother person Right and show them
the respect and love instead ofbeing selfish.
I think we have complicated.
These generations havecomplicated things so much and
(13:09):
to the point where marriage is ascary thing, something that
they don't want to do.
Yeah, and they can take a biglesson on keeping it simple.
Success is all you need to see.
In 62, going on 63 years andI've seen it personally.
My wife has seen it personallythe level of love and respect
(13:30):
you guys are like newlyweds.
Gerald still loves you.
He sees you as his girlfriend.
His eyes light up when he seesyou and you know, like anything
in life, like you said, there'shard work, there's good times,
there's bad times and peopleneed not give up so quick in
(13:51):
everything.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
And it's so easy to do.
I mean, you get mad and you sayhurtful things and then it goes
bad to worse.
But you just need to workthrough it and not give up.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Pete, yeah, people have pushed back so hard over
the last few generations ontraditional marriage,
traditional values.
But it works.
You can push back all you want,but put God first in your life,
put your husband and wife firstin your life, fight together
(14:27):
through the hard times, findcommon ground.
Don't go to bed angry and keepit.
I said it again keep it simple.
It doesn't have to becomplicated.
Life will throw enoughcomplications at you to where
you don't need to add to it,right?
Well, I think that is.
(14:49):
That's a wonderful story, andpeople are going to hopefully
take that to heart and play itover and over again.
Hopefully thousands, if notmillions, of people will hear it
.
And have a happy marriage andmake their marriage happy.
Well, thank you, nancy.
That was really what I wantedto talk to you about, and I
(15:10):
wanted to get that letter outthere for everybody.
This will be short and sweet,but all the proof is there.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Yep.
We're still together, stillgoing strong.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Well, we'll do this again at 70 years.
Okay, all right, sounds good.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Well, thank you, you're welcome.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
All right.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
It's been a pleasure.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
You've been listening to Real People, Real Life.
Our passion is to have realconversations with real people
who've made it.
Real people who've made it, whodid it on their own terms.
Plus, we talk about business,fitness, politics, education.
Plus we don't shy away from ourthoughts on the controversial
(15:50):
issues of the day.
So if it's happening, you'llhear it here.
We'll be back soon, but in themeantime, catch us on Twitter or
X at RPRL podcast and onYouTube at real people, real
life podcast.
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