Recover Yourself: Out from Under the Influence

Recover Yourself: Out from Under the Influence

If you're done feeling lost or being let down by others it is time to start Recovering Yourself. Recovery might start for some of us at rock bottom but it doesn't have to for us to start moving in a new direction. If you're ready to do the work of awareness then you can start "Recovering To" today. This podcast covers the myriad of topics you'll face on a journey to recovering yourself. We explore the systems of justice, education, commerce, and much more all of which contribute to addictions we each carry. To Recover Yourself you first have to be aware of where you are not yourself. Support this podcast:


July 3, 2022 50 mins

Happy 4th of July!!! Now let's dig into the wound of Independence.

In this episode, I speak with Mary Wagstaff, a holistic alcohol coach for Women. She is radicalizing what it means to live alcohol-free through the lens of Women's empowerment for the aquarian age. We cover a lot of territories as we discuss masculine and feminine energy and the difference between independent and individual. "Independence" belongs to the group while...

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 Creating Chaos in our lives is easy, and we all do it. Every expectation we carry for ourselves or others creates chaos. In this episode, I am talking with Thomas FreeMe about how when we have expectations and lie to ourselves and others we are creating chaos. That, and how the system, that we look to for guidance is creating chaos as well.   

If you are interested in contacting Thomas FreeMe check out his work by g...

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May 1, 2022 71 mins

I recently returned from Guatemala where I spent 5.5 days in complete darkness at The Hermitage Retreats. This experience gave me a lot to think about and a lot to integrate into my life. Darkness has always been beautiful for me. When I was much younger I used to sit in a bathroom in the house I lived in which got no light in it unless the basement light was on. Sitting in there I had beautiful experiences of space breathing, what...

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November 14, 2021 34 mins

Awareness is a cumulative process. If you start right now and open yourself to becoming aware of something that you previously were not aware of, like “What are you avoiding doing?” Whether there is a clear answer or not matters less than being aware that the question may have an answer. That is how we become aware, we can simply start by asking a question about how we feel about something and approach it with curiosity.

Ann HInce ...

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November 7, 2021 54 mins

Harm reduction has been a huge focus of mine recently and I am happy to be conversing with Gretchen for this episode. I have to admit, I am a fan of toughness. That is not to say I am a fan of tough love, many people see my approach as one that stems from tough love but that’s not the case. Love, deep love, when we have it for ourselves and can offer it to others can very quickly look tough as it relates to the tough love movement,...

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October 31, 2021 40 mins

All of my work revolves around this concept of "Recovering To." Without hesitation, I believe that if we can each recover ourselves and stop living under the influence of others we will not only live amazing lives, we will contribute, love, inspire, and support everyone around us without even trying. Doing that will also help us naturally evade unnecessary conflict, stress, and health problems. But we first have to recognize where ...

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October 24, 2021 44 mins

In this episode With Jenna Velez, she mentions the phrase “Post Traumatic Growth” which I had not yet heard in my travels. It is such a great phrase for many of my experiences, because, yes, I have experienced trauma, but it was that trauma that I grew through. That is not to say I want others to experience that trauma as well but we, all of us on this planet, have resilience.

In a recent episode with Ken Bain he mentioned that we ...

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October 17, 2021 31 mins

The system of treatment as it relates to substance use has not followed the research. There is no other way to put it. If we were to examine the system related to its actions and the outcomes they claim to desire we can easily see that the system has a problem. It is not acting appropriately and continuing to perpetuate problems.   

This is not only the case for the addiction treatment world, unfortunately. We have alread...

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October 10, 2021 52 mins

NAD is a supplement. Similar to testosterone, if we are not producing enough, we want to supplement it. Well, NAD enhances the ability of Vitamin B3 to support cellular healing in the body. This is a naturally occurring element in the body in which production can decrease for several reasons. Substance abuse or any abuse the body suffers could potentially erode the production of this in our body, as well as aging.

I am talking with...

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October 3, 2021 47 mins

Harm Reduction is exactly what it sounds like, the desire to reduce harm. If you are not actively wanting to do harm there is no reason to oppose the ideas around harm reduction. We are looking to have a system that treats people with more respect than it currently does. Does that mean when we get you to treat people better, we will stop, no it doesn’t. Because when you treat people a little better, we will ask you to once again re...

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I did bad in school. It’s no secret, but that experience kept me from seeking higher education. I also lived many years denying my own intelligence in an attempt to not have to face the pain of not fitting in. Many of you may know I do not enjoy reading, that is not an easy thing to own about oneself while surrounded by readers. It should be said that those who I surrounded myself with did love me, but it was my perceptions and fea...

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In this episode, I am speaking with Judy Grisel about the A and B processes. And this is something we all have to face. Have you ever drunk coffee to feel more awake and then, when it wears off you are more tired? That is the A and B process at work. The thing is though, as you hear in our conversation, that after a time, and increased use or abuse, the A process has to be used consistently just to feel normal. So, if you have been...

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June 6, 2021 53 mins

This episode is for Caregivers. If you are a parent, or a child caring for an elderly parent, a counselor, clinician, or even a sibling, this episode unpacks so much of the complex backdrop of caregiving. Over the past year, we have seen those in our lives who have usually been the most resistant, get taxed to their limit. This is because the normal resilient load has been multiplied, not only by more people but by more problems as...

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May 23, 2021 40 mins

Energy is all around us and we interact with it at every turn, in every moment. There are things that energetically lift us and other things that weigh us down. How we interact with energy is one thing we can look at whenever we experience any sort of malady we can think of, even being a victim.

This week I am talking with Dr. Marina Kostina about the energy of the choices we make. If everything we do has an energy cost associated ...

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So what is a pacifier? It is anything you do to soothe yourself when you are feeling uncomfortable. Some of these, like drugs, alcohol, or gambling have been known to cause serious problems in some people’s lives. That is primarily because people feel extreme levels of discomfort and want soothing. That, and the amount of dopamine, and other chemicals, these substances and activities are known to release, are such, that the person ...

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May 2, 2021 38 mins

Connect with Kaii on Instagram @KaiiMarie_LLC or through her website

It is so important for us to look inward especially as caregivers of any kind. We want so often to be of help simply because we may feel lost ourselves. When we look to help are we looking to solve the problems of others? Or are we looking to be a temporary post for them to lean on while they get their legs under them again?

I have spoke...

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The most important relationship we have is with ourselves. Now that I’ve said that let’s look at romantic relationships in recovery. You’re move to recovery was done for you; I hope. Your partner is going to experience a lot of benefits from your hard work but that doesn’t mean they don’t have work to do as well. In this episode I am talking with Chantal Jauvin about her new book Love Without Martinis which is all about relationshi...

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April 18, 2021 34 mins

The Long Game is not always something that is obvious. The world around us, especially here in the United States, wants us to focus on the Short Game. The Short Game gets us leaning on others, Google, status, money, and all sorts of things to help us feel more comfortable. We can fool ourselves into thinking the Short Game is the goal, like marriage. When the Long Game, which is hidden behind the Short Game, is where we are going t...

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April 11, 2021 45 mins

Zero Tolerance is kind of a big deal. Like trickle-down economics, it doesn’t work but we (our society) keep on working it. When we turn away from the facts around zero tolerance like it causes more harm than good, which has been proven time and again, we are just kicking the can down the road. You see, Zero Tolerance is a bill that is going to have to be paid, but, and this is just like addiction, if we don’t face it head-on and m...

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If we insist on waiting for the best time to do what we want to do or to do what is good for us, we’ll never get around to it. There is no perfect time to do anything. So, any time is the perfect time to do everything. I cannot tell you how frustrating it is to hear people use the phrase “Bucket List,” if you want to do something start doing it now. And that is no different when it comes to our vices.   

The last 2 years ...

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