June 4, 2024 • 33 mins
Rachel Radway is a high sensory introvert, coach, facilitator, and author of “Perceptive: The Power and Potential of High Sensory Perception” (2025).
Highly perceptive herself, Rachel has faced all the challenges that come with this trait (which affects around 20% of people) and she now coaches high sensory female leaders to lean into the gifts that this trait offers, so they can thrive professionally and personally.
During our conversation, we talk about leaning into our innate abilities, supporting our social wellbeing, exploring the Metaverse and reconnecting through letter writing.
Some platforms and communities we discuss on this podcast:
Johnson O'Connor Research Foundation https://www.jocrf.org/
SpatialChat https://www.spatial.chat/
Pavia.io https://pavia.io/
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Learn more about Rachel Radway
https://www.rercoaching.com/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/reradway/
https://www.youtube.com/@rachelradway-rercoaching/videos
Rachel Radway’s a certified leadership and executive coach with 25+ years’ leadership experience in tech startups and Fortune 500s, she’s passionate about helping other high-sensory women leaders learn to thrive professionally and personally.
Having lived in nine countries and changed careers a few times, Rachel knows the value of connection. Because so many of the women she works with have told her they feel alone, she created her mastermind, the G.R.I.T. Collaborative, to offer community and a safe space to share, learn, and grow.
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I hope our conversation inspires you to rediscover connection in your personal or professional life.
Subscribe now and let the magic unfold.
Love & sparkles,
✨Shelley
About Your Host
Hello you, I’m Shelley Doyle, founder of The Communiverse.
Through our 90-day program, The Social Wealth Roadmap, we empower remote and relocated leaders, founders, and creators build real-world social wealth—so they feel connected, trusted, and supported, both online and offline, no matter where they are in the world.
We also support hybrid and distributed teams, combining cutting-edge research on social well-being and social wealth with two decades in corporate communications to deliver mind-shifting talks, workshops, and programs around the world.
Find out more at TheCommuniverse.com or find me on LinkedIn.
Global Workshop Tour "Beyond Screens" is in full swing! Booking now for 2025
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hello and welcome to Rediscovering Connection.
I am your host, shelley Doyle,and before I introduce today's
guest, I would just love toshare a little bit about my
journey to here.
So this is about a year into mypodcast journey.
When I started working inconnection belonging a couple of
(00:22):
years ago, I kind of felt likeI was alone in this, doing this
work, helping people to createfriendships, connections,
particularly working with expats, people that move and people
that haven't naturally got acircle around them, because
that's how I was when I firstmoved to Canada.
I have now named what I do,which is always helpful.
(00:42):
So what I'm doing now is socialwell-being, and the reality is
that when I moved across theother side of the world, my
social well-being suffered bigtime.
Not only did I not haveconnections here, but I felt
disconnected with my friends, myfamily, my connections around
the world because we moved inthe middle of the pandemic.
(01:03):
My connections around the world, because we moved in the middle
of the pandemic not ideal.
So I am really thrilled that Ican now name what it is that I
do, which is to support socialwellbeing, working with
individuals and also going intothe workplace to help teams,
because loneliness is a bigcontributor to ill health.
It also contributes to a lackof engagement in organizations.
(01:25):
So this is something that I'mdelving deep into in my master's
thesis, which I've now begun.
I'm in my literature review andfinding some astounding
information which I'm reallylooking forward to share across
my different platforms.
So that's just a little bitabout my journey where I'm at at
the moment.
Now I will introduce you to myguest.
(01:46):
This is episode 23 ofRediscovering Connection, and
today's guest is Rachel Radway,who's based in California, and
Rachel specializes in workingwith high sensory leaders.
So I was really curious aboutthis high sensory leaders to
delve into what this is.
Am I a high sensory leader?
Are you this high sensoryleaders?
To delve into what this is?
Am I a high sensory leader?
Are you a high sensory leader?
(02:07):
So come with me on this journeyto understand what this is and
what's really brought Rachelinto this realm of supporting
these leaders to connect in newways.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
I'm thrilled to be here Thank you for having me,
and I'm excited about talkingabout this topic.
When I was about a youngteenager, an adolescent, and
people asked me what I wanted tobe when I grew up, I wanted to
find a company that wouldsponsor me to live in every
country in the world for sixmonths to a year so that I could
(02:41):
learn every language, so that Icould basically help people
communicate, and I have alwaysbeen a language person.
I've always been a cultureperson.
I've lived, like you.
I've lived abroad.
I've lived in nine differentcountries and studied nine
different languages, and I'vealways been really interested in
(03:03):
learning about other culturesand how people communicate with
each other and connect with eachother.
There have also been times inmy life where I felt very, very
disconnected, and I think theolder I get to it.
There was a long period of timewhere connection wasn't a
(03:23):
priority for me, and the older Iget, the more important it is,
and that's it's.
It's come around again tobecoming an important focus,
both personally andprofessionally.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Wow, I'm so envious of your language skills.
So is this something that'sinnate?
Do you think some people arejust particularly good at
languages?
Or is it just opening thatdoorway in your mind and then it
all kind of fits together?
Speaker 2 (03:57):
When I was a couple of years out of college, I had
this really, really random job.
I worked at this nationalnonprofit in the United States.
It's called the JohnsonO'Connor Research Foundation and
they are focused on people'sinnate abilities and we actually
talked a lot about this.
So there was a whole series oftests that we ran on people, and
(04:19):
they weren't paper and penciltests, they weren't the kinds of
things that you could know theanswer to, and I scored in the
99th percentile on the teststhat were associated with
language learning.
So I think there are differentpieces to it.
There are memories, differentkinds of memory.
(04:39):
There's a memory for wordlearning and there are memories
for rhythm and for sort of.
You know, people who aremusical often can learn
languages a little bit more.
So I think there's definitelyan innate ability to it, and
then, of course, when you havethat, when it comes more easily
(05:01):
to you, you get more excitedabout it, more enthusiastic
about it, and then you mightsort of get into it more.
Anybody can learn a language,but I also think if it's harder
for you, people sometimes startbuilding up resistance when it's
not as easy.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
So how about musical then?
Are you musical and have youlearned different instruments
simultaneously to the languages?
Speaker 2 (05:24):
I wish.
So I, let's see.
We had to study the recorder inseventh grade in music class.
I was pretty good and Iactually composed some music for
percussion instruments.
I never really learned aninstrument and I wish that was
something that I had startedwhen I was really young.
I tried in my early 30s to pickup.
(05:47):
I wanted to play the fiddle, Iwanted to be Alison Krauss and
just do bluegrass and I foundcrazily enough.
I found a music teacher who waswilling to take me on at that
point and she said you know,most of my students are actually
six years old.
I said it's OK, I'm notplanning on getting on any
(06:10):
stages, I just want to, like Iwant to play fiddle in my living
room, like that's all I want.
But I quickly realized thatthat is one particular
instrument that you really needto start when you're like six
years old.
It didn't work very well, soused to sing, uh, in choirs,
although I'm I get serious stagefright.
But um, yeah, that's about theextent of my musical abilities.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
I actually just received an invitation this
morning.
My friend, maya uh, sings in arock choir so I've just received
an invitation to go watch therock choir in June, which which
I'm super excited about.
Maybe I'll put a link here foranyone in Victoria that wants to
come and visit the rock choir.
But I had heard about the rockchoir.
There were some friends in inHemel Hempstead that joined a
(06:54):
rock choir.
I think it's maybe a franchisearound the world and yeah, like
really fun current modern rocksongs in choir and there's
definitely something about theconnection that's formed in in
song singing together.
Right, it's what the churchdoes extremely well.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
That sounds really fun.
I'd love to learn more aboutthat.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
I need to go look it up after our after our call yes,
okay, so why don't we delve alittle bit bit into the work and
the method that you've created?
Is it called the GRIT method?
Speaker 2 (07:31):
So I have a small group mastermind that I
facilitate, and it is called theGRIT Collaborative.
Grit is an acronym for Grace,resilience, intuition and Trust,
which are the four foundationalelements that are really
important to me and to the womenthat I work with.
I work with women who have atrait that I call high sensory
(07:52):
perception, and it's a globaltrait, although that name is not
very well known.
About 20 to 30% of thepopulation have it.
70% of the people who have itare introverts, and, on top of
that, our brains work a littlebit differently.
We're wired a little bitdifferently, and the number one
(08:15):
thing that I hear from womenthat I work with clients, women
whom I talk with on a regularbasis is I feel so alone, I
don't have people that I cantalk with about this.
My brain doesn't work likeother people.
I'm at work and the situationcomes up and nobody else is
reacting the same way I am.
So I created this mastermindfor these women, to show them
(08:42):
that they're not alone, tocreate a really safe, supportive
community where they can betheir full selves, unmask and
learn and grow, embrace theirsuperpowers, because a lot of
women who have this trait don'teven realize that they have them
deal with some of thechallenges that come with it and
just really form a community.
(09:03):
It's the most important part, Iknow.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Know that's, I know it's your focus yes, so I've got
a couple of things coming upfor me.
One is so it is some of thatbeing that you're quite affected
by other people's energies.
Um, yeah, so I have spoken toquite a few people that have
really felt this like after thepandemic, when they were then
going back into the workplaceand they realized that that
(09:29):
sense it was kind of a sensoryoverload in a way, because you
you've stopped being used tothat environment and maybe
you're used to over so manyyears that you didn't
necessarily realize that therewas any anything wrong.
But then you're thrown backinto it and it's almost like we
then need to, we need to prepareourselves again for those
(09:50):
energies meshing.
Uh, I have also experienced thismyself as well, like in the
work that I do, um, connectingand kind of making new friends
and connections where I am inthis new place, and then I I
have the one-to-one connectionwith individuals, but then I
(10:10):
bring them all together intogroup environments and actually
sometimes the energies don'tmesh well and then I'm feeling
uneasy because there's some theenergies aren't working and
maybe people aren't seeing eachother in the way that I see them
(10:31):
, and then I'm uncomfortable andI'm unable to just be in the
environment because there'sthings going on in my head that
right is that I might, should Ibe in your circle.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
I would love to have you in my circle, shelly.
So there are a couple differentthings that come up for me
based on what you were saying.
Uh, for the first part of it, Ithink um, people who have this
trait, you typically have itfrom birth.
It's, it's a genetic thing, itis our.
Our brains are wired a littlebit differently, but people
(11:13):
handle that in different ways.
So for some people and it canbe both feeling other people's
energy and it can be externalstimuli like sound, like
lighting, like temperature, likesmells, if there's a kitchen in
your workplace and people aremicrowaving food there are
dozens and dozens of differentthings that people are sensitive
to or that people areperceiving, who have this trait,
(11:35):
and some people do learn tokind of block it all out after
you know, years trainingthemselves or in the workplace.
Some people never do.
I actually never really did,and after COVID I never ended up
going back into the workplace.
I've worked remotely for a longtime.
So people have different waysof kind of handling it and
(11:58):
different thresholds too for thedifferent stimuli.
Switching to the second part ofwhat you were talking about in
terms of the one-on-oneconnections and then bringing
people together in the group.
One of the things I've learnedis because I do have one-on-one
relationships with all of thepeople.
(12:19):
That came into my first when Iwas doing a beta of the
mastermind, and so I knew themall and I brought them together.
And the first session, silence.
I'm sitting there thinking, no,come on, I know all these women.
They're all super smart,they're all kind, they're all
(12:40):
warm, they're all empathetic.
This is going to work, and whatI realized is it really just
takes time, especially when youhave a group who are primarily
introverts.
It takes a lot of time to buildup that feeling of
psychological safety.
I may have assumed well, ofcourse it's safe because you
(13:02):
know I'm facilitating and I knowall these people, but they
don't know each other, of course, and you really have to not
only hold the space but createways for them to engage with
each other and for them to feelsafe, being vulnerable with each
(13:24):
other and sharing things thathelp them learn about each other
as human beings and not just asprofessionals in workplaces.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
And it can take a while, but then it starts to gel
yeah, this really speaks to towhat I'm doing, because we, with
what I am doing, like a lot ofit is social and not
professional, like in my ownlife, as well as professional
stuff that I do.
So, um, the last couple ofgroup activities that I brought
(13:56):
together, I did bring everybodyinto circle and then we would,
we were going around and sharing, so that definitely started to
help.
Prior to that, I was just kindof doing these social mixes and
people were coming together butbecause I wasn't charging for
them, because they're like mysocial connections, I almost
(14:17):
didn't feel in my power tofacilitate.
So I was bringing them together.
But then everyone was kind ofcoming together and not really
knowing what they're meant to bedoing.
And there was also the thingabout do we want to be talking
about personal life orprofessional life, because a lot
of them are solopreneurs yeahso it's like helping to guide
(14:38):
people on what the expectationis.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
It's really interesting.
I was just on a call thismorning.
I've just recently joined acommunity that is focused on
creating better workplaces, buta lot of the community A gets
(15:04):
together socially and B they'rejust it's.
It's a really warm, lovelygroup of people and they all do
different things.
Some of them are employees inin companies and some of them
are self-employed and they havethis monthly community call.
So today was my first one andit's interesting because it's
really uh, so today was my firstone and it's interesting
(15:33):
because it's really they'veobviously they've done this
several times and so I don'tknow whether they've tried
different formats.
It was a blend of out with astory that was a personal story
of his own, and then we got intobreakout groups and they
provided prompts and thebreakouts were three people and
you could either go with theprompts or not go with the
prompts and you could take theprompts either personally or
professionally.
So it was a lovely blend ofenough structure so that people
(15:57):
didn't feel too awkward and knewwhat to do, but also freedom so
that if the prompt didn't feellike didn't resonate or didn't
feel like something we couldreally have a conversation about
, we could always change it, soit worked really nicely, and I
could see that working in apurely social group as well, and
I could see that working in apurely social group as well.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
And as we're on the topic of social, why don't we go
into social well-being?
So the definition of socialwell-being is a feeling of being
connected and supported byothers.
So that might be in ourprofessional life, in our
personal life.
Social well-being doesn'tdecipher between these.
(16:41):
It's really how we're feelingin our life.
So I just wondered, thinking ofthose topics like what does
social wellbeing look like foryou?
Like when you're feelingconnected and supported, how
much social interaction do youneed?
And you mentioned about beingintroverts being a core market
for you.
Would you consider yourself anintrovert and does that play a
part in your social well-being?
Speaker 2 (17:01):
It absolutely does.
So I am definitely an introvert.
I also need more downtimebecause of the perceptiveness
that I was talking about.
I can easily go a day or twowith very little social
interaction and be fine with it.
After that I start to get alittle bit itchy.
(17:23):
I live alone and so you knowtoo much of it and I start
getting really isolated and I'mvery aware of that.
So I'm in an interestingsituation right now because I
live in a little tiny town whereI actually don't know very many
people.
There were very specific reasonsI moved here, questioning those
now or not questioning them.
(17:44):
They were the right things atthe time.
But now I'm really missinglocal community.
So I, first of all, I'm gettingout there, I'm starting to meet
more people locally andstarting to go to more events,
but I'm really not a big eventkind of person.
I'm getting out there, I'mstarting to meet more people
locally and starting to go tomore events, but I'm really not
a big event kind of person.
I'm more one-on-one.
So I have very consciouslychosen to I don't want to say
(18:09):
schedule my life, because that'snot it, but I reach out to
people that are friends or youknow that I really enjoy talking
with and make sure that I haveconnections scheduled every few
days, you know so, and theycould be all over the world,
which is great because I lovethat but just making sure that I
(18:32):
have both those personal socialconnections as well as my my
work connections.
I love working with my clients,but in between I also have to
schedule some of the people whoare my friends in New Zealand
and in the UK and in Spain andin Ireland and in lots of other
places whom I can't just sort ofrun out to see and have lunch
(18:53):
with easily.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
So I'm hearing that there is a piece missing there
and that is the in-person piece.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Very definitely and I am um.
I'm renting where I am at themoment and I have another bit on
my lease.
I haven't had another year here, but I am very actively um.
Looking at.
It was interesting when youwere talking about roots earlier
, before we got on the call.
I've really never had roots.
(19:22):
I've probably moved more than50 times in my life and I've
lived all over the world and allover the United States and I'm
really looking for my community.
I think I have a sense of where.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
I'm going to be moving, but I'm also.
You want to share it as anexclusive.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
The world is waiting to hear.
So there are some areas in theNorth Bay of San Francisco where
I still have a lot of friends Ilived.
I was born in San Francisco.
I did not grow up there.
I moved back there aftercollege.
I was born in San Francisco, Idid not grow up there.
I moved back there aftercollege.
I lived there for most of thenext 20 something years, took
six years out, moved to Seattle,moved back to California and
(20:12):
then moved away again and I wasjust back there visiting some
friends in April and that reallyprobably is home more than any
place else for me.
So I suspect that that's whereI'm going to be going back.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
So, my, I have a really big history of travel
myself.
Um, my father emigrated to NewZealand when I was 11 and
actually he just returned to theUK last year.
After 30 years he's returned tothe UK, so I think I am feeling
a bit more of a pull to the UKat the moment because both my
(20:49):
parents are now in the UK, so mykids grandparents are all there
and my partner's father's alsothere.
So, yeah, I'm definitelyfeeling a bit of this pull to
the UK, or at least to Europe,to be a bit closer, conscious
that, um, yeah, my parents areall in really good health right
(21:10):
now and I feel incrediblyblessed for that, because I've
got a lot of friends who's uhwho are going through um, a lot
with looking after their elderlyparents right now.
So I really want to embracethis time that we have, um, and
time just seems to go so, soquickly.
Um, so let's talk about digital.
So, um, spoken about, there'sdefinitely a gap missing in the
(21:34):
in-person.
So have you toyed with anydigital boundaries?
Um, leaning into kind ofplatforms that are filling you
up versus ones that aredepleting your energy?
Uh, having apps on your phoneand then taking them off,
deleting profiles, putting themback on does any of that
resonate it?
Speaker 2 (21:55):
it does.
I'm'm laughing because I havepretty clear boundaries as far
as my phone Again, because I canget overstimulated easily and
I'm very sensitive around sleep.
For example, if I'm doinganything digital late at night,
(22:17):
I don't sleep well at all.
So I also I learned this longago when I was in the corporate
world I put as few apps on myphone as possible.
I really don't spend a lot oftime on my phone.
I hate texting and when peopletry to have whole conversations
back and forth via text itdrives me nuts.
I'm just like pick up the phone, let's just have a phone call
(22:38):
and actually talk.
I am on WhatsApp because I dohave friends all over the world
and that's just the easiest wayto be able to connect with them.
But if we really want to have aconversation, we'll jump on a
Zoom call or on a WhatsApp calland not just do the you know,
the texting back and forth, themessaging.
I just let somebody know thismorning I don't do video calls
(23:05):
after 6 pm.
I just you know if I try not todo any work related stuff after
6 pm, but I can get on a phonecall, especially if it's the
person who wanted to connect isa former client who I was very
close to, and so I really wantto catch up with her and we'll
just do a phone call.
There's a tension definitelybecause, being geographically
(23:27):
isolated, digital is how most ofmy connection is and at the
same time I'm, you know, zoomfatigue is a real thing.
So there are some connections.
I have a friend in the Bay Area, for example.
We talk every couple of months,we have a regularly scheduled
(23:48):
call, but we do it by phonerather than on Zoom, and we can
just.
Sometimes we'll go walkingaround and I live by the ocean
right now so I can go walk bythe beach while I'm talking to
her, go walk by the beach whileI'm talking to her.
So I experiment, but I try tomake it as warm and human as
possible within the digitalrealm.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Beautiful.
Yeah, it sounds like you've gotsome really healthy boundaries,
and something that's coming upfor me when you're just talking
about Zoom fatigue is justwondering have you explored any
metaverse platforms yet?
Because I have, and a recentcatch-up that I facilitated with
a group of friends that Istudied with 20 years ago.
I've been bringing themtogether in um, in group live,
(24:35):
uh virtual gatherings, probablyonce a quarter for the last 18
months or so, and the last onewas the first one we did in the
metaverse and I debriefed withone of the girls afterwards and
she just said how different itfelt and her feedback was that,
um, you kind of you still seeeach other, but you're, you have
(24:56):
it like you have a beautifulbackdrop and it's more like
you're in a bubble rather thanin a square box, and then your
bubbles are like overlapping.
So it was almost like we werehugging each other in real life
rather than being in thesesquare boxes where you're
literally not even touching eachother.
(25:17):
It really gave her a differentsensation of togetherness.
So I wonder if you've exploredany of these platforms yet so I
haven't gone out on my own toexplore them.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
I have participated in retreats and gatherings and
other things that have used afew different AR VR platforms
and I have to say I haven'tloved any them.
I'm not sure that I'veencountered one that is like
what you're describing.
Some of them you just haveavatars and you don't see the
(25:49):
faces at all.
Some of them you do see thefaces and they're in these.
You know other kinds ofenvironments, but some of the
environments don't, for me,don't spark intimacy or, or you
know, or warmth or anything likethat.
It's very funny because therewas one.
The company that I worked for afew years ago had a woman who
(26:10):
was absolutely amazing atcreating virtual retreats for
the entire company stellar, andthey were the best experiences I
can possibly imagine.
And I can't remember the nameof the, the metaverse that we
were in, the universe that wewere in.
But, um, I decided to go outone morning and get on the boat
(26:31):
in the in the AR, the VRuniverse, and I just went on the
speedboat and I went, you know,tooling around and bizarrely,
it actually felt like I hadtaken a little boat trip.
I don't know how.
It was a really strange thing,but the personal connection in
that world didn't feel the same.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
But were there people that you already knew?
Some of them, yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
From the office environment, yeah yeah, we had
still never met in personbecause we were from all over
the world.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
But you've been zooming together for some time,
so you're familiar with eachother in this space.
Exactly some of my events um inis spatial chat, which is very
simple.
It's free for up to five usersat one time.
Really easy to get in.
You don't need to set up anavatar or anything, you can just
(27:26):
jump in, which I think is theobstacle for some of the world.
It's like the setup andeverything you have to choose
your outfit and all that jazz.
So you don't need to do any ofthis.
It's a very, very simple andbasic one, but it's felt the
best one for me.
I have toyed with quite a fewand this one just feels nice for
social interactions.
Okay, and this is I.
(27:46):
I've been doing it personallywith people that I already know.
So, um, I'm actually startingwith a client in a couple of
weeks who wants to do this forhis own, for his own friends, so
I'm going to be kind of takinghim on tours to see which worlds
feel good for him to then sendvery compelling invitations to
(28:09):
his friends who he wants toreconnect with around the world,
to make it sound a bit moreyeah, a bit more exciting to
join, to see if it can reallyenhance his personal connections
.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Interesting.
Oh, that's fascinating.
I will look into it more and Iwill definitely look and see if
I can figure out which world theexperience was.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
You went on the speedboat.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Yes, it was very cool .
Speaker 1 (28:34):
I am invested in one of the worlds which I invested
off plan a couple of years ago.
It's a world called Pavia,based on an Italian town.
I did not anticipate investingI think it was February 2022,
and to still not be able to behosting events here.
So I'm really hoping that I canhave my space here.
(28:57):
So that's where I'm intendingto kind of have my headquarters
and be able to facilitatepersonal events and also have
clients facilitate their eventsin as well.
So watch this space.
I'm excited.
It looks very, very, very cooland lots of businesses are there
, so it's kind of going to be acool place to network with other
companies as well.
(29:17):
So I shall be inviting you intoa to an event in Pavia before
long, rachel.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
Watch your inbox sounds good, I will do that,
looking forward to it.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
Yeah, so I just want to, as we're wrapping up our
conversation, just wondering ifanything else is coming to you
on the topic of rediscoveringconnection in your own life or
personally or professionally.
Has any real key nugget droppedin for you that really helps
you to stay connected orpotentially really helps your
(29:52):
clients to feel connected again,when maybe they've really been
feeling this period ofdisconnection, when they come to
you?
Speaker 2 (30:02):
I think what comes up for me is just how common it is
for us to want more connectionand not necessarily know how to
find it.
And I also know, among a lot ofthe women that I work with,
(30:30):
because we are highly empatheticand highly sensitive to a lot
of details, we tend to overthinka lot and a lot of fears come
up around putting ourselves outthere sometimes and also around
reaching out to people that wemay not have been in contact
with for a while.
I had a client very recentlywho had lost touch with somebody
(30:52):
that had been a very, very,very dear friend who lives in
another country.
And when I asked about you know, we actually talked about
handwriting a letter and becausewriting is something that is
important to this person and shewas afraid that the person
might not want to get back intouch or that something would be
(31:13):
awkward, because you know thatthere would be blame or shame or
something around.
Well, I didn't get in touch andI didn't get in touch and we, we
build these things up in ourminds and and they tend to
snowball and, honestly, if youcan just get out of your own way
and take that first step,chances are that person is just
(31:39):
going to be thrilled that youreached out and you can create.
I've done this myself and youcan.
You can create and reconnect,recreate really wonderful
connections this way.
So I think just being a littlevulnerable and being, you know,
willing to put yourself outthere can bring such amazing
(32:04):
rewards.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Beautiful.
I couldn't put it better myself.
And as a build to that, I wouldjust say that when you're
thinking about doing this andtaking some initiative to
reconnect, put yourself in theplace of the receiver.
Imagine how beautiful it wouldbe to go to your letterbox and
to receive a letter from thisperson that you do have this
(32:28):
authentic connection with andthat can really help you to get
to the other side of it and gowow, this is a gift.
This is a gift that you'regiving.
Thank, rachel.
This has been such a pleasureto connect with you today and go
deep into this to learn aboutyour connection habits, and I
really do think that some ofthese insights are going to help
(32:48):
other people.
We will leave some links.
If there's one particular placethat people can find you, then
feel free to share it with ushere.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
I will do that.
My website is RERcoachingcom,and that's a great way to find
me.
I'm also Rachel Radway onLinkedIn, which is where I spend
most of my time, so I wouldlove to see your listeners there
, beautiful.
Thanks, Rachel Thank you somuch for having me, Shelley.
It's been a pleasure.
Hello and welcome to Rediscovering Connection.
I am your host, shelley Doyle,and before I introduce today's
guest, I would just love toshare a little bit about my
journey to here.
So this is about a year into mypodcast journey.
When I started working inconnection belonging a couple of
(00:22):
years ago, I kind of felt likeI was alone in this, doing this
work, helping people to createfriendships, connections,
particularly working with expats, people that move and people
that haven't naturally got acircle around them, because
that's how I was when I firstmoved to Canada.
I have now named what I do,which is always helpful.
(00:42):
So what I'm doing now is socialwell-being, and the reality is
that when I moved across theother side of the world, my
social well-being suffered bigtime.
Not only did I not haveconnections here, but I felt
disconnected with my friends, myfamily, my connections around
the world because we moved inthe middle of the pandemic.
(01:03):
My connections around the world, because we moved in the middle
of the pandemic not ideal.
So I am really thrilled that Ican now name what it is that I
do, which is to support socialwellbeing, working with
individuals and also going intothe workplace to help teams,
because loneliness is a bigcontributor to ill health.
It also contributes to a lackof engagement in organizations.
(01:25):
So this is something that I'mdelving deep into in my master's
thesis, which I've now begun.
I'm in my literature review andfinding some astounding
information which I'm reallylooking forward to share across
my different platforms.
So that's just a little bitabout my journey where I'm at at
the moment.
Now I will introduce you to myguest.
(01:46):
This is episode 23 ofRediscovering Connection, and
today's guest is Rachel Radway,who's based in California, and
Rachel specializes in workingwith high sensory leaders.
So I was really curious aboutthis high sensory leaders to
delve into what this is.
Am I a high sensory leader?
Are you this high sensoryleaders?
To delve into what this is?
Am I a high sensory leader?
Are you a high sensory leader?
(02:07):
So come with me on this journeyto understand what this is and
what's really brought Rachelinto this realm of supporting
these leaders to connect in newways.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
I'm thrilled to be here Thank you for having me,
and I'm excited about talkingabout this topic.
When I was about a youngteenager, an adolescent, and
people asked me what I wanted tobe when I grew up, I wanted to
find a company that wouldsponsor me to live in every
country in the world for sixmonths to a year so that I could
(02:41):
learn every language, so that Icould basically help people
communicate, and I have alwaysbeen a language person.
I've always been a cultureperson.
I've lived, like you.
I've lived abroad.
I've lived in nine differentcountries and studied nine
different languages, and I'vealways been really interested in
(03:03):
learning about other culturesand how people communicate with
each other and connect with eachother.
There have also been times inmy life where I felt very, very
disconnected, and I think theolder I get to it.
There was a long period of timewhere connection wasn't a
(03:23):
priority for me, and the older Iget, the more important it is,
and that's it's.
It's come around again tobecoming an important focus,
both personally andprofessionally.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Wow, I'm so envious of your language skills.
So is this something that'sinnate?
Do you think some people arejust particularly good at
languages?
Or is it just opening thatdoorway in your mind and then it
all kind of fits together?
Speaker 2 (03:57):
When I was a couple of years out of college, I had
this really, really random job.
I worked at this nationalnonprofit in the United States.
It's called the JohnsonO'Connor Research Foundation and
they are focused on people'sinnate abilities and we actually
talked a lot about this.
So there was a whole series oftests that we ran on people, and
(04:19):
they weren't paper and penciltests, they weren't the kinds of
things that you could know theanswer to, and I scored in the
99th percentile on the teststhat were associated with
language learning.
So I think there are differentpieces to it.
There are memories, differentkinds of memory.
(04:39):
There's a memory for wordlearning and there are memories
for rhythm and for sort of.
You know, people who aremusical often can learn
languages a little bit more.
So I think there's definitelyan innate ability to it, and
then, of course, when you havethat, when it comes more easily
(05:01):
to you, you get more excitedabout it, more enthusiastic
about it, and then you mightsort of get into it more.
Anybody can learn a language,but I also think if it's harder
for you, people sometimes startbuilding up resistance when it's
not as easy.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
So how about musical then?
Are you musical and have youlearned different instruments
simultaneously to the languages?
Speaker 2 (05:24):
I wish.
So I, let's see.
We had to study the recorder inseventh grade in music class.
I was pretty good and Iactually composed some music for
percussion instruments.
I never really learned aninstrument and I wish that was
something that I had startedwhen I was really young.
I tried in my early 30s to pickup.
(05:47):
I wanted to play the fiddle, Iwanted to be Alison Krauss and
just do bluegrass and I foundcrazily enough.
I found a music teacher who waswilling to take me on at that
point and she said you know,most of my students are actually
six years old.
I said it's OK, I'm notplanning on getting on any
(06:10):
stages, I just want to, like Iwant to play fiddle in my living
room, like that's all I want.
But I quickly realized thatthat is one particular
instrument that you really needto start when you're like six
years old.
It didn't work very well, soused to sing, uh, in choirs,
although I'm I get serious stagefright.
But um, yeah, that's about theextent of my musical abilities.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
I actually just received an invitation this
morning.
My friend, maya uh, sings in arock choir so I've just received
an invitation to go watch therock choir in June, which which
I'm super excited about.
Maybe I'll put a link here foranyone in Victoria that wants to
come and visit the rock choir.
But I had heard about the rockchoir.
There were some friends in inHemel Hempstead that joined a
(06:54):
rock choir.
I think it's maybe a franchisearound the world and yeah, like
really fun current modern rocksongs in choir and there's
definitely something about theconnection that's formed in in
song singing together.
Right, it's what the churchdoes extremely well.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
That sounds really fun.
I'd love to learn more aboutthat.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
I need to go look it up after our after our call yes,
okay, so why don't we delve alittle bit bit into the work and
the method that you've created?
Is it called the GRIT method?
Speaker 2 (07:31):
So I have a small group mastermind that I
facilitate, and it is called theGRIT Collaborative.
Grit is an acronym for Grace,resilience, intuition and Trust,
which are the four foundationalelements that are really
important to me and to the womenthat I work with.
I work with women who have atrait that I call high sensory
(07:52):
perception, and it's a globaltrait, although that name is not
very well known.
About 20 to 30% of thepopulation have it.
70% of the people who have itare introverts, and, on top of
that, our brains work a littlebit differently.
We're wired a little bitdifferently, and the number one
(08:15):
thing that I hear from womenthat I work with clients, women
whom I talk with on a regularbasis is I feel so alone, I
don't have people that I cantalk with about this.
My brain doesn't work likeother people.
I'm at work and the situationcomes up and nobody else is
reacting the same way I am.
So I created this mastermindfor these women, to show them
(08:42):
that they're not alone, tocreate a really safe, supportive
community where they can betheir full selves, unmask and
learn and grow, embrace theirsuperpowers, because a lot of
women who have this trait don'teven realize that they have them
deal with some of thechallenges that come with it and
just really form a community.
(09:03):
It's the most important part, Iknow.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Know that's, I know it's your focus yes, so I've got
a couple of things coming upfor me.
One is so it is some of thatbeing that you're quite affected
by other people's energies.
Um, yeah, so I have spoken toquite a few people that have
really felt this like after thepandemic, when they were then
going back into the workplaceand they realized that that
(09:29):
sense it was kind of a sensoryoverload in a way, because you
you've stopped being used tothat environment and maybe
you're used to over so manyyears that you didn't
necessarily realize that therewas any anything wrong.
But then you're thrown backinto it and it's almost like we
then need to, we need to prepareourselves again for those
(09:50):
energies meshing.
Uh, I have also experienced thismyself as well, like in the
work that I do, um, connectingand kind of making new friends
and connections where I am inthis new place, and then I I
have the one-to-one connectionwith individuals, but then I
(10:10):
bring them all together intogroup environments and actually
sometimes the energies don'tmesh well and then I'm feeling
uneasy because there's some theenergies aren't working and
maybe people aren't seeing eachother in the way that I see them
(10:31):
, and then I'm uncomfortable andI'm unable to just be in the
environment because there'sthings going on in my head that
right is that I might, should Ibe in your circle.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
I would love to have you in my circle, shelly.
So there are a couple differentthings that come up for me
based on what you were saying.
Uh, for the first part of it, Ithink um, people who have this
trait, you typically have itfrom birth.
It's, it's a genetic thing, itis our.
Our brains are wired a littlebit differently, but people
(11:13):
handle that in different ways.
So for some people and it canbe both feeling other people's
energy and it can be externalstimuli like sound, like
lighting, like temperature, likesmells, if there's a kitchen in
your workplace and people aremicrowaving food there are
dozens and dozens of differentthings that people are sensitive
to or that people areperceiving, who have this trait,
(11:35):
and some people do learn tokind of block it all out after
you know, years trainingthemselves or in the workplace.
Some people never do.
I actually never really did,and after COVID I never ended up
going back into the workplace.
I've worked remotely for a longtime.
So people have different waysof kind of handling it and
(11:58):
different thresholds too for thedifferent stimuli.
Switching to the second part ofwhat you were talking about in
terms of the one-on-oneconnections and then bringing
people together in the group.
One of the things I've learnedis because I do have one-on-one
relationships with all of thepeople.
(12:19):
That came into my first when Iwas doing a beta of the
mastermind, and so I knew themall and I brought them together.
And the first session, silence.
I'm sitting there thinking, no,come on, I know all these women.
They're all super smart,they're all kind, they're all
(12:40):
warm, they're all empathetic.
This is going to work, and whatI realized is it really just
takes time, especially when youhave a group who are primarily
introverts.
It takes a lot of time to buildup that feeling of
psychological safety.
I may have assumed well, ofcourse it's safe because you
(13:02):
know I'm facilitating and I knowall these people, but they
don't know each other, of course, and you really have to not
only hold the space but createways for them to engage with
each other and for them to feelsafe, being vulnerable with each
(13:24):
other and sharing things thathelp them learn about each other
as human beings and not just asprofessionals in workplaces.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
And it can take a while, but then it starts to gel
yeah, this really speaks to towhat I'm doing, because we, with
what I am doing, like a lot ofit is social and not
professional, like in my ownlife, as well as professional
stuff that I do.
So, um, the last couple ofgroup activities that I brought
(13:56):
together, I did bring everybodyinto circle and then we would,
we were going around and sharing, so that definitely started to
help.
Prior to that, I was just kindof doing these social mixes and
people were coming together butbecause I wasn't charging for
them, because they're like mysocial connections, I almost
(14:17):
didn't feel in my power tofacilitate.
So I was bringing them together.
But then everyone was kind ofcoming together and not really
knowing what they're meant to bedoing.
And there was also the thingabout do we want to be talking
about personal life orprofessional life, because a lot
of them are solopreneurs yeahso it's like helping to guide
(14:38):
people on what the expectationis.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
It's really interesting.
I was just on a call thismorning.
I've just recently joined acommunity that is focused on
creating better workplaces, buta lot of the community A gets
(15:04):
together socially and B they'rejust it's.
It's a really warm, lovelygroup of people and they all do
different things.
Some of them are employees inin companies and some of them
are self-employed and they havethis monthly community call.
So today was my first one andit's interesting because it's
really uh, so today was my firstone and it's interesting
(15:33):
because it's really they'veobviously they've done this
several times and so I don'tknow whether they've tried
different formats.
It was a blend of out with astory that was a personal story
of his own, and then we got intobreakout groups and they
provided prompts and thebreakouts were three people and
you could either go with theprompts or not go with the
prompts and you could take theprompts either personally or
professionally.
So it was a lovely blend ofenough structure so that people
(15:57):
didn't feel too awkward and knewwhat to do, but also freedom so
that if the prompt didn't feellike didn't resonate or didn't
feel like something we couldreally have a conversation about
, we could always change it, soit worked really nicely, and I
could see that working in apurely social group as well, and
I could see that working in apurely social group as well.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
And as we're on the topic of social, why don't we go
into social well-being?
So the definition of socialwell-being is a feeling of being
connected and supported byothers.
So that might be in ourprofessional life, in our
personal life.
Social well-being doesn'tdecipher between these.
(16:41):
It's really how we're feelingin our life.
So I just wondered, thinking ofthose topics like what does
social wellbeing look like foryou?
Like when you're feelingconnected and supported, how
much social interaction do youneed?
And you mentioned about beingintroverts being a core market
for you.
Would you consider yourself anintrovert and does that play a
part in your social well-being?
Speaker 2 (17:01):
It absolutely does.
So I am definitely an introvert.
I also need more downtimebecause of the perceptiveness
that I was talking about.
I can easily go a day or twowith very little social
interaction and be fine with it.
After that I start to get alittle bit itchy.
(17:23):
I live alone and so you knowtoo much of it and I start
getting really isolated and I'mvery aware of that.
So I'm in an interestingsituation right now because I
live in a little tiny town whereI actually don't know very many
people.
There were very specific reasonsI moved here, questioning those
now or not questioning them.
(17:44):
They were the right things atthe time.
But now I'm really missinglocal community.
So I, first of all, I'm gettingout there, I'm starting to meet
more people locally andstarting to go to more events,
but I'm really not a big eventkind of person.
I'm getting out there, I'mstarting to meet more people
locally and starting to go tomore events, but I'm really not
a big event kind of person.
I'm more one-on-one.
So I have very consciouslychosen to I don't want to say
(18:09):
schedule my life, because that'snot it, but I reach out to
people that are friends or youknow that I really enjoy talking
with and make sure that I haveconnections scheduled every few
days, you know so, and theycould be all over the world,
which is great because I lovethat but just making sure that I
(18:32):
have both those personal socialconnections as well as my my
work connections.
I love working with my clients,but in between I also have to
schedule some of the people whoare my friends in New Zealand
and in the UK and in Spain andin Ireland and in lots of other
places whom I can't just sort ofrun out to see and have lunch
(18:53):
with easily.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
So I'm hearing that there is a piece missing there
and that is the in-person piece.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Very definitely and I am um.
I'm renting where I am at themoment and I have another bit on
my lease.
I haven't had another year here, but I am very actively um.
Looking at.
It was interesting when youwere talking about roots earlier
, before we got on the call.
I've really never had roots.
(19:22):
I've probably moved more than50 times in my life and I've
lived all over the world and allover the United States and I'm
really looking for my community.
I think I have a sense of where.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
I'm going to be moving, but I'm also.
You want to share it as anexclusive.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
The world is waiting to hear.
So there are some areas in theNorth Bay of San Francisco where
I still have a lot of friends Ilived.
I was born in San Francisco.
I did not grow up there.
I moved back there aftercollege.
I was born in San Francisco, Idid not grow up there.
I moved back there aftercollege.
I lived there for most of thenext 20 something years, took
six years out, moved to Seattle,moved back to California and
(20:12):
then moved away again and I wasjust back there visiting some
friends in April and that reallyprobably is home more than any
place else for me.
So I suspect that that's whereI'm going to be going back.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
So, my, I have a really big history of travel
myself.
Um, my father emigrated to NewZealand when I was 11 and
actually he just returned to theUK last year.
After 30 years he's returned tothe UK, so I think I am feeling
a bit more of a pull to the UKat the moment because both my
(20:49):
parents are now in the UK, so mykids grandparents are all there
and my partner's father's alsothere.
So, yeah, I'm definitelyfeeling a bit of this pull to
the UK, or at least to Europe,to be a bit closer, conscious
that, um, yeah, my parents areall in really good health right
(21:10):
now and I feel incrediblyblessed for that, because I've
got a lot of friends who's uhwho are going through um, a lot
with looking after their elderlyparents right now.
So I really want to embracethis time that we have, um, and
time just seems to go so, soquickly.
Um, so let's talk about digital.
So, um, spoken about, there'sdefinitely a gap missing in the
(21:34):
in-person.
So have you toyed with anydigital boundaries?
Um, leaning into kind ofplatforms that are filling you
up versus ones that aredepleting your energy?
Uh, having apps on your phoneand then taking them off,
deleting profiles, putting themback on does any of that
resonate it?
Speaker 2 (21:55):
it does.
I'm'm laughing because I havepretty clear boundaries as far
as my phone Again, because I canget overstimulated easily and
I'm very sensitive around sleep.
For example, if I'm doinganything digital late at night,
(22:17):
I don't sleep well at all.
So I also I learned this longago when I was in the corporate
world I put as few apps on myphone as possible.
I really don't spend a lot oftime on my phone.
I hate texting and when peopletry to have whole conversations
back and forth via text itdrives me nuts.
I'm just like pick up the phone, let's just have a phone call
(22:38):
and actually talk.
I am on WhatsApp because I dohave friends all over the world
and that's just the easiest wayto be able to connect with them.
But if we really want to have aconversation, we'll jump on a
Zoom call or on a WhatsApp calland not just do the you know,
the texting back and forth, themessaging.
I just let somebody know thismorning I don't do video calls
(23:05):
after 6 pm.
I just you know if I try not todo any work related stuff after
6 pm, but I can get on a phonecall, especially if it's the
person who wanted to connect isa former client who I was very
close to, and so I really wantto catch up with her and we'll
just do a phone call.
There's a tension definitelybecause, being geographically
(23:27):
isolated, digital is how most ofmy connection is and at the
same time I'm, you know, zoomfatigue is a real thing.
So there are some connections.
I have a friend in the Bay Area, for example.
We talk every couple of months,we have a regularly scheduled
(23:48):
call, but we do it by phonerather than on Zoom, and we can
just.
Sometimes we'll go walkingaround and I live by the ocean
right now so I can go walk bythe beach while I'm talking to
her, go walk by the beach whileI'm talking to her.
So I experiment, but I try tomake it as warm and human as
possible within the digitalrealm.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Beautiful.
Yeah, it sounds like you've gotsome really healthy boundaries,
and something that's coming upfor me when you're just talking
about Zoom fatigue is justwondering have you explored any
metaverse platforms yet?
Because I have, and a recentcatch-up that I facilitated with
a group of friends that Istudied with 20 years ago.
I've been bringing themtogether in um, in group live,
(24:35):
uh virtual gatherings, probablyonce a quarter for the last 18
months or so, and the last onewas the first one we did in the
metaverse and I debriefed withone of the girls afterwards and
she just said how different itfelt and her feedback was that,
um, you kind of you still seeeach other, but you're, you have
(24:56):
it like you have a beautifulbackdrop and it's more like
you're in a bubble rather thanin a square box, and then your
bubbles are like overlapping.
So it was almost like we werehugging each other in real life
rather than being in thesesquare boxes where you're
literally not even touching eachother.
(25:17):
It really gave her a differentsensation of togetherness.
So I wonder if you've exploredany of these platforms yet so I
haven't gone out on my own toexplore them.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
I have participated in retreats and gatherings and
other things that have used afew different AR VR platforms
and I have to say I haven'tloved any them.
I'm not sure that I'veencountered one that is like
what you're describing.
Some of them you just haveavatars and you don't see the
(25:49):
faces at all.
Some of them you do see thefaces and they're in these.
You know other kinds ofenvironments, but some of the
environments don't, for me,don't spark intimacy or, or you
know, or warmth or anything likethat.
It's very funny because therewas one.
The company that I worked for afew years ago had a woman who
(26:10):
was absolutely amazing atcreating virtual retreats for
the entire company stellar, andthey were the best experiences I
can possibly imagine.
And I can't remember the nameof the, the metaverse that we
were in, the universe that wewere in.
But, um, I decided to go outone morning and get on the boat
(26:31):
in the in the AR, the VRuniverse, and I just went on the
speedboat and I went, you know,tooling around and bizarrely,
it actually felt like I hadtaken a little boat trip.
I don't know how.
It was a really strange thing,but the personal connection in
that world didn't feel the same.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
But were there people that you already knew?
Some of them, yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
From the office environment, yeah yeah, we had
still never met in personbecause we were from all over
the world.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
But you've been zooming together for some time,
so you're familiar with eachother in this space.
Exactly some of my events um inis spatial chat, which is very
simple.
It's free for up to five usersat one time.
Really easy to get in.
You don't need to set up anavatar or anything, you can just
(27:26):
jump in, which I think is theobstacle for some of the world.
It's like the setup andeverything you have to choose
your outfit and all that jazz.
So you don't need to do any ofthis.
It's a very, very simple andbasic one, but it's felt the
best one for me.
I have toyed with quite a fewand this one just feels nice for
social interactions.
Okay, and this is I.
(27:46):
I've been doing it personallywith people that I already know.
So, um, I'm actually startingwith a client in a couple of
weeks who wants to do this forhis own, for his own friends, so
I'm going to be kind of takinghim on tours to see which worlds
feel good for him to then sendvery compelling invitations to
(28:09):
his friends who he wants toreconnect with around the world,
to make it sound a bit moreyeah, a bit more exciting to
join, to see if it can reallyenhance his personal connections
.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Interesting.
Oh, that's fascinating.
I will look into it more and Iwill definitely look and see if
I can figure out which world theexperience was.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
You went on the speedboat.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Yes, it was very cool .
Speaker 1 (28:34):
I am invested in one of the worlds which I invested
off plan a couple of years ago.
It's a world called Pavia,based on an Italian town.
I did not anticipate investingI think it was February 2022,
and to still not be able to behosting events here.
So I'm really hoping that I canhave my space here.
(28:57):
So that's where I'm intendingto kind of have my headquarters
and be able to facilitatepersonal events and also have
clients facilitate their eventsin as well.
So watch this space.
I'm excited.
It looks very, very, very cooland lots of businesses are there
, so it's kind of going to be acool place to network with other
companies as well.
(29:17):
So I shall be inviting you intoa to an event in Pavia before
long, rachel.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
Watch your inbox sounds good, I will do that,
looking forward to it.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
Yeah, so I just want to, as we're wrapping up our
conversation, just wondering ifanything else is coming to you
on the topic of rediscoveringconnection in your own life or
personally or professionally.
Has any real key nugget droppedin for you that really helps
you to stay connected orpotentially really helps your
(29:52):
clients to feel connected again,when maybe they've really been
feeling this period ofdisconnection, when they come to
you?
Speaker 2 (30:02):
I think what comes up for me is just how common it is
for us to want more connectionand not necessarily know how to
find it.
And I also know, among a lot ofthe women that I work with,
(30:30):
because we are highly empatheticand highly sensitive to a lot
of details, we tend to overthinka lot and a lot of fears come
up around putting ourselves outthere sometimes and also around
reaching out to people that wemay not have been in contact
with for a while.
I had a client very recentlywho had lost touch with somebody
(30:52):
that had been a very, very,very dear friend who lives in
another country.
And when I asked about you know, we actually talked about
handwriting a letter and becausewriting is something that is
important to this person and shewas afraid that the person
might not want to get back intouch or that something would be
(31:13):
awkward, because you know thatthere would be blame or shame or
something around.
Well, I didn't get in touch andI didn't get in touch and we, we
build these things up in ourminds and and they tend to
snowball and, honestly, if youcan just get out of your own way
and take that first step,chances are that person is just
(31:39):
going to be thrilled that youreached out and you can create.
I've done this myself and youcan.
You can create and reconnect,recreate really wonderful
connections this way.
So I think just being a littlevulnerable and being, you know,
willing to put yourself outthere can bring such amazing
(32:04):
rewards.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Beautiful.
I couldn't put it better myself.
And as a build to that, I wouldjust say that when you're
thinking about doing this andtaking some initiative to
reconnect, put yourself in theplace of the receiver.
Imagine how beautiful it wouldbe to go to your letterbox and
to receive a letter from thisperson that you do have this
(32:28):
authentic connection with andthat can really help you to get
to the other side of it and gowow, this is a gift.
This is a gift that you'regiving.
Thank, rachel.
This has been such a pleasureto connect with you today and go
deep into this to learn aboutyour connection habits, and I
really do think that some ofthese insights are going to help
(32:48):
other people.
We will leave some links.
If there's one particular placethat people can find you, then
feel free to share it with ushere.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
I will do that.
My website is RERcoachingcom,and that's a great way to find
me.
I'm also Rachel Radway onLinkedIn, which is where I spend
most of my time, so I wouldlove to see your listeners there
, beautiful.
Thanks, Rachel Thank you somuch for having me, Shelley.
It's been a pleasure.
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