Fire rarely reignites in a noisy room. We bring in a veteran divorce mediator to show how quiet skills—neutrality, boundaries, and deep listening—turn high-conflict standoffs into agreements people can live with. From personal triggers to client blowups, he walks us through the real work behind “staying neutral” and why it’s not a stance but a job: set expectations, shut down disrespect, and come prepared with options that honor both the numbers and the nerves.
You’ll hear why drama often spikes when there’s less to divide, how confidentiality protects everyone, and what it takes to read the iceberg beneath each demand. Instead of positional bargaining—my way versus yours—he uses interest-based negotiation to find the option no one named but both can accept. Think Thai food when the room is stuck on burger versus pizza. Along the way, small affirmations and clear math lessons become turning points. When people feel seen and understand the tradeoffs, the thunderstorm passes and progress starts.
We also talk about the circle around the couple. Friends and family can help most by asking “How can I help?” and then sitting with the answer, even if it’s silence. Presence beats advice. The mediator shares why he sometimes ends a case to protect the process, how he prepares between sessions to save clients time and money, and why service above self starts with local acts of care. If you’re navigating divorce, leading a team through conflict, or just trying to argue less and understand more, these tools will steady your next hard conversation.
Want more resources and a steady guide? Visit equitablemediation.com for checklists, videos, and a free call where available. If this conversation helped, follow Reignite Resilience, share this episode with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review so others can find it too.
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Disclaimer: The information provided in this podcast is for general informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The co-hosts of this podcast are not medical professionals. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on this podcast. Reliance on any information provided by the podcast hosts or guests is solely at your own risk.
Pamela Cass is a licensed broker with Kentwood Real Estate
Natalie Davis is a licensed broker with Keller Williams Realty Downtown, LLC
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