NXIVM is back in the headlines after Allison Mack’s new podcast — but for survivors like Sarah Edmondson, the story never ended.
She was one of the faces of The Vow on HBO — the woman who blew the whistle on NXIVM’s “self-help” empire that turned into a full-blown notorious cult.
This episode is about what happened after the escape: healing from coercive control, rebuilding trust, and learning to believe your own voice again.
Sarah opens up about the psychological hangover of leaving NXIVM — how fear, shame, and identity unravel once the system is gone.
We unpack what freedom looks like after indoctrination, how cultish behavior shows up in everyday systems, and the slow process of learning safety again.
It’s a conversation about resilience, humor, and the long road back to self-trust.
If you haven't heard Part 1 yet, here you go! https://podcast.allisonhare.com/post/274
What You Will Learn:
- How Sarah Edmondson escaped the NXIVM cult and what freedom really looked like
- The psychology of coercive control and how to spot it early
- Why rebuilding trust is the hardest part after leaving a cult
- How cult dynamics show up in modern coaching and wellness spaces
- How to protect your agency without losing your sense of belonging
Resources Mentioned
Podcast: A Little Bit Culty hosted by Sarah Edmondson & Nippy Ames
Pre-Order new book: A Little Bit Culty
The Vow (HBO docuseries)
Scarred by Sarah Edmondson (book)
Sarah Edmondson’s website – sarahedmondson.com
Notable Quotables (from Sarah Edmondson)
“I see a woman who’s trying to right a wrong.” (02:20)
“When you’re in a cult, you don’t think you’re in a cult.” (13:34)
“Black-and-white thinking is culty thinking.” (11:58)
“Freedom isn’t a moment. It’s a practice.” (Paraphrased version you had before — confirmed not verbatim, remove it.)
Instead, use: “Leaving NXIVM was the easy part. Healing after was the work.” (09:33)
“If you’re in a group and your gut tells you something’s off — and the leader says you’re in resistance — leave.” (27:49)
“You can go on a seeking journey and want to better yourself, but you’re already whole.” (28:42)
Timestamps
- 0:00 Intro – NXIVM returns to headlines
- 3:50 What it took to finally walk away
- 10:42 The aftershock of coercive control
- 17:05 Rebuilding trust and identity
- 24:55 Modern cult behavior in everyday life
- 32:20 Freedom, humor, and healing
Takeaways
- Freedom after control starts with reclaiming your intuition.
- Coercive systems don’t end with cult leaders — they live in every space that punishes dissent.
- Recovery isn’t linear — it’s relearning trust one choice at a time.
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