December 20, 2024 • 39 mins
Become a Relative & send some love
Brien Johnson joins us in a compelling conversation that peels back the layers of his latest musical project, "Life Before 16." From a youth entangled in gang affiliations and legal troubles, Brien shares a turning point at 15, when the stress he caused his mother led him to reassess his path. His candid reflections offer a glimpse into a life transformed by resilience and the absence of strong male role models, showing how a stint in juvenile detention became a pivotal chapter steering him away from crime.
The discussion unfolds the power of positivity and authenticity, particularly through the lens of music. He shares his own journey of rediscovery, moving to North Carolina and navigating co-parenting, which reignited his passion for music production. We delve into tracks like "Been Waiting For" and "Misguided," which echo the themes of longing and the struggles of growing up without role models, emphasizing how music serves as a conduit for personal expression and healing.
Marriage and fatherhood also take center stage, as we reflect on the lessons of commitment and the profound impact children have on our lives. Emphasizing the power of unconditional love and the importance of cherishing every moment, we share insights on patience and visualization, drawing inspiration from audiobooks like Charlamagne's "Get Honest or Die Lying." We invite you to explore our audiobook project, "The Waiting Room," as we weave stories that promise to inspire and resonate with anyone navigating their own life journeys.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
yes, sir, good, all right.
Oh, hey, we back season two,episode two.
Uh, I go by the name of tweezy.
Y'all know who I am, but to theleft of me who I?
I got Got Brian Brian, who,johnson, brian Johnson, brian
(00:27):
Johnson, bro, what's good man?
What's up?
We was just chatting, talkingit up, man, how we like been
knowing each other for like overfive plus years, so you got
something new out, yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
I got a lot of things new.
I got new music out.
Yeah, I got a lot of things new.
I got new music out.
Yeah.
And man, we're coming up on abook.
Man, my first book coming out,called the Waiting Room.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
The Waiting Room and we're going to get on that.
But you got something calledLife After 16?
Life Before 16.
Life Before 16.
Yeah, let's talk about it man,let's do it man.
Life Before 16, man.
What inspired 416, man?
Speaker 2 (01:03):
what inspired you to create this EP, man so with Life
Before 16, man, it had beenfour years since I dropped the
project and I was just at aplace where, you know, so much
had happened, man I got married,I had a kid and, at the end of
(01:26):
the day, man, still, I still gota story to tell and, um, you
know, I I was like man, I needto keep, keep working on my
craft and keep working.
So I was at a place where I gotmy studio set up in my own, my
own spot.
I was like, let you know, and Ihad started producing myself
and all that, I was like, let mestart making music again.
Um, and it just kind of, justkind of took off from there, man
, yeah, took me a couple ofmonths to knock it out, man, but
(01:47):
life before 16 is just likewhat?
The kind of kid that I was, thekind of person that I was before
I was 16, man, I was a wild kidman.
My story's wild man, you know,was banging.
All that stuff Got locked upbefore 16.
Was banging, all that stuff gotlocked up before 16?
(02:08):
And, you know, before, before Iwas, before, I, you know, gave
my life over to god, man, I justwanted to put that project out
man and um continue to tell thatstory you know.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
So when you, when you say you was, you was uh banging
and all of that like what was?
What was a normal day like thatbefore 16?
Speaker 2 (02:23):
shoot.
So, um, normal day for me, manwas, was a was an easy wake and
bake.
You know, easy wake and bake.
Uh, go to go to school, gothrough the front doors, out the
back doors, and I failed myhigh grade year.
Um, that's because I skippedschool every single day.
(02:43):
Man met up with the homies youknow what I'm saying and just
and just did whatever, whateverwe, whatever came up to it, you
know, came on our minds and doman, right, right, right, you um
you was Crip Blood, I wasCripping it was Crips out here
yeah, man Crips, traveling manright, that's uh what it was.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Crips out here yeah, man Crips was traveling man,
right, that's uh what Iunderstand.
Like the, the um, I guess youcould say the teeter-totter or
the uh transition.
What is something you feel likeyou needed to change from?
(03:25):
You know going from banging andskipping school and you know
normal wake and bake, like whathit you and said, hey, let's
switch it up 15 years old.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
15 years old and your mother comes and visits you.
You're in a orange suit and youlook at her, looking at all the
stress that you're putting herthrough her hair thinning, you
giving your own mother her firstgray hairs.
You know what I'm saying?
Like that for me was kind of myturning point.
(04:02):
I'm like yo you really trippingbro you know what?
I'm saying Before then Icouldn't take any accountability
for what I was doing.
It was everybody else's faultaround me.
And just got to that place, man, where my mom was visiting me
in jail, I was like yo, this hasgot to stop.
You know what I'm saying.
So that's kind of what it wasfor me, man.
(04:24):
You know what I'm saying.
So that's kind of what it wasfor me, man.
Gratefully man and I say thisall the time being going to a
juvenile detention center at 15,best thing that could have
happened.
Why do you say that I wouldhave ended up in jail or dead?
You know what I'm sayingBecause I mean legit was.
I mean you name it.
(04:45):
I was doing it, bro, fromrobbing, killing, fighting.
I had three felonies and threemisdemeanors by the time.
I was 15 years old.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
Deep.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So there really wasn't too manyother options where I would
have ended up at if I would havekept going in that route.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Yeah, so did you have any, like I know.
But like you got siblings right.
Yeah, I'm the youngest andyou're the youngest.
Where were your older siblings?
They were brothers.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I got.
I got one older brother that'sin Georgia and I have another
brother that's in Texas and bythat time I was doing that stuff
.
They really wasn't around likethat and they out of the house
at that point.
But at that point me mom and Igot an older sister, who's you
know closer to age, but I didn'treally have, no, I didn't
really have no male role modelsthere to yoke me up Like yo you
tripping.
So you know what I'm saying.
I just kind of left my owndevices.
(05:39):
Where was dad at?
Pops really was never in thepicture man, he also lived in
Georgia.
He didn't really become.
He didn't really become likeverbally there, even like until
after I got out where we kind ofrekindled a relationship at
(06:03):
that point.
But before then he kind ofknocked off.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
So like, like, do you feel like um your brother's not
being there and your and yourfather not being there could be
like a a result of like how youwere acting?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
all right I so, in hindsight, it definitely wasn't
from my brothers, and mybrothers, at the end of the day,
they I can't put that on them,they're not, you know, they're
not my parent, but definitelypops not being there, for sure,
man, you, you, you know, my momused to always be like you know,
brian, why do you think you'relike that was kicked out of
school.
I got kicked out of everyschool I was in, oh, nine yards
(06:40):
man, and she would be like, isit because your pops been there
and I would?
I would have this, this very um, like nonchalant, like man, I
can't miss what.
I don't never had type of typeof vibe to it, but the whole
time I was bro, I was, I was, Iwas feeling the absence of that
(07:00):
structure not being there, thatcorrection not being there, that
discipline not being so, thatcorrection not being there, that
discipline not being there.
So I didn't know it, you knowwhat I'm saying.
I couldn't put my finger on itas a teenager, but yeah for sure
, that definitely, thatdefinitely had an effect.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Okay, now, looking back at it, I know you said you
don't think your brothers had.
It wasn't their fault, wasn'treally getting at it like that.
It's more like they're normallythe ones that are looking after
you.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Taking you under the wing andtrying to show you the rope,
(07:33):
yeah, but not having them there.
And then your dad and youseeing your mom, you putting
your mom through all that stresswhen you hit 15 in that orange
jumpsuit, that was the switch.
That was the switch.
So when you got out, what didyou do, bro?
Speaker 2 (07:50):
by the time I got, out man, it had been 13 months.
So I did 13 months in thepublic and then I went down to
Richmond and did nine monthsdown there.
But by the time I got out, bro,I was locked in.
I was 16 by the time I got out.
I did my prom at 14, got lockedin at 15, got out at 16.
(08:11):
So this is all kind of threeyears, two and a half three
years span.
I locked in bro to like by thattime I was praying.
So I'm like oh God, whateveryou want me to do, whatever you
have for me, I'm doing it.
You know what I'm saying.
I'm not going back to thestreets, none of that.
So all the people that I wasconnected with I dropped.
(08:33):
You know what I'm saying.
First day I got out, one of thebig, one of the big homies set
me up like yo, you still down,are you still banging?
And I was like no, like had tostraight up tell him no, you
know what I'm saying.
And the conversation went likethis Like where were you at the
last 13 months of my life?
I ain't get no letters from you.
(08:54):
I ain't get no, you know whatI'm saying.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
I was about to ask that too.
Yeah, like did any of them getyou up?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Nope, and you know what I'm saying.
When you growing up, you hearthat man, you hear folk talk
about they at you know I'msaying it was, and it was like
that, like right, like the onlypeople that was really writing
me was my mama, some shorty, youknow what I'm saying.
Like, but beyond, but beyondthat man, like the people and
(09:19):
folks that I was running aroundwith doing all that stuff, man,
they, there was nowhere to befound.
So when I got out, you want to?
You still down, you stillbanging, let's go do.
No, there's a no me.
You know what I'm saying.
So, um, you know, drop that.
And then, just I, I gotconnected to the church man,
which was the the best thingthat I think could have happened
.
Um, because it it gave me.
(09:42):
It gave me a reason to get up,gave me a reason to stay off the
streets, it gave me a reason tonot fall back into that same
cycle that I had been in priorto.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
You know, getting locked up, right right.
Well, church to me, man, I feellike a lot of your answers get
solved when you go to church.
Sometimes I think us as blackpeople, we kind of like kind of
try to steer away from it andtry to figure out our own our
(10:13):
own way.
Yeah, but we can't do it, yeah,we can't do it without the man
upstairs.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
I was.
So I was grateful enough thento where?
So my mom took me to churchgrowing up, but I was checked
out by the time I was eight,nine years old.
And here it is.
You got to have a.
You got to have a realrelationship, like it can't.
It can't be church, it can'tjust be you going to church and
listen to that, to the pastor,because if you ain't got your
(10:39):
own relationship with him, whathe's saying sounds like a
lottery ticket, you know whatI'm saying.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
It sounds like rambling a bunch of nothing Like
it.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Just it just don't, it just don't make sense, right?
So I was grateful enough towhere I had my, I had my own
relationship with God, to whereI was.
Like me, going to church was abyproduct, you know what I'm
saying, of my relationship withhim.
But you write them and I meanthat community, that faith, that
that what you need is it isfound, you know, right there in
that church.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Yeah, Because I mean, like for me, man, I just got
back.
Yeah, what was that?
Two months ago, kadeem, that'swhat's up, bro.
Yeah, like two months ago,that's what's up, bro.
You know what I mean.
Because it was like for me, itwas like, bro, I was lost.
Yeah, you know what I mean,because I did the Marine Corps
thing.
Yeah, you know, I made it backtwice, you know what I mean.
(11:32):
And my cousin Ro told me he'slike cuz, you know God, always
been with you.
I'm like, yeah, he been with me, but I ain't got no
relationship with him.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
Yeah, and I feel like you knowI needed me doing crashing out
and doing crazy stuff.
You know what I'm saying.
I'm like yo, I need to get myanswers answered and solved.
(11:55):
I need to go talk to him.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
So my best friend Quee, she introduced me you know
what I mean to her church.
Shout out to First Baptist,first Baptist shout out and from
there, man like I was going tochurch and listening and
everything that Pastor Jenkinswas saying it was hitting home.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
And when I looked I'm like man,yep, it's time, yeah, it's time
(12:23):
.
And then her mom like didn'tknow me from a can of paint.
Yeah, she prayed for me, likeshe's like, I just want to pray
for you.
I feel something from you.
I just want to pray for you,come on.
And I was just like, yes, no,yeah, she wanted me to go holler
.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
Yeah, holler at big God.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Yeah, so that's what I did, man.
I had my kids there.
Yeah, I relationship it's onyou you know what I'm saying to
build that relationship, but you, I'm bringing you with me, so
you, can see it.
Like I'm not giving up.
Yeah, you know what I mean,Because there's been times where
I was just like man, I don'teven know what I'm going to do
(12:59):
you know what I mean.
So it's good man in jail orwhatever and switching your life
around.
And I always tell kids, man,you never know Like they might
be going through something rightnow and when they see this,
when they drop, it might hitthem.
You know what I'm saying.
And I tell people all the timethere's nothing wrong with
having a relationship with God.
(13:20):
Nah, bro, I think that's thedopest thing to have.
You know what I'm saying.
That's going to defeat thepurpose of having that
relationship.
Yeah, I understand.
So that's that's.
I commend you on that for one.
Same to you bro, yeah,appreciate it and two like man,
you you always been a, aconnector, you and Frank man,
(13:55):
frank, like Frank, matter offact connected us.
He was like yo geez Holla atBrian man, he's dope.
But you and Frank man, y'allalways had that connection to
where it was always positive.
And I think that's what we'remissing sometimes in our
neighborhoods.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
Like it's positive.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
Everybody don't have to be sliding and doing all of
this negative stuff.
You know what I'm saying.
You still can do great thingsand still be dope out here.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
You can be yourself, man.
Yeah, be yourself and still,like you just said, be positive.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
Be positive, just be positive.
You know what I'm saying.
Yeah, and it's a lot of ways togo negative.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
It's definitely you can gonegative easy, and I always tell
my kids it's easy to get introuble, right, it's hard being
good.
Yeah, which one are you goingto do?
Yeah, you know what I'm saying,because the hard way ain't
(14:49):
going to get you nowhere andwhen it hit it ain't going to be
nice.
You know what I'm saying.
So, yeah, life before 16.
Yes, sir, you said you startedback producing because I was
going to ask you who produced it, because I listened to it.
Okay, I listened to it plentyof times, a couple times on the
way here.
Yeah, and I'm like who did thisproduction?
(15:09):
You know what I mean.
So you jumped back into yeah,that's me, man the whole joint,
the entire top to bottom.
How was it, man Like?
How was it getting back intothat realm of creating?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Man, oh my gosh.
So I'll tell you the truth, man, and I hit on it a little bit
in my book, but me and my ladyactually you know, me and my
wife actually separated.
We had separated for a coupleof months, man, and a lot of
people don't notice, but Iactually had moved.
I had moved out of the state,moved to North Carolina.
Yeah, I was doing the wholeco-parent thing for a while, man
(15:43):
, and during that time, man, Ididn't touch music.
I didn't touch music.
I was just down there grinding,man, make it back to the kid
whole nine yards.
And then, probably in May, weended up reconciling and I ended
up coming back home, like Isaid, the first thing that I did
was jump back into the music,into the craft, just got back
(16:08):
into it and, honestly, I waslike man, I felt like I had lost
it.
I was like man, I ain't, Idon't even know if I can do this
, blah, blah, blah and it justkind of.
I just kind of picked it backup where I left it at, man, um,
but yeah, man, I produced thewhole thing, man recorded it, um
, but it was, it was great.
Go the way that I created it.
You know the first track is usand I knew I wanted a synth to
(16:38):
introduce the project.
I don't know why, but I cameacross the synth.
I was like, okay, that's it,and it just kind of built from
there, man, and the rest of thetracks, man, just be kind of
exploring and coming across whatfelt good to me and just kind
of creating for me.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
So track two.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Been Waiting For.
Yes, sir.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
Where were?
What were you coming from?
What space you was coming from?
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Man.
So, with Been Waiting For man,that is like man, like this is
what I've been waiting for.
I've been waiting to make musiclike this, like all of my other
music before and there'snothing wrong with it was
produced by other people.
You know what I'm saying.
I got an amazing track with youthat was produced by you.
I got another project, but toreally like get to where I'm
(17:25):
producing my own stuff, writingmy own stuff, it just felt like
me.
You know what I'm saying.
Um, so I was like man, this iswhat I've been waiting for, to
put out music like this.
So that's kind of what beenwaiting for is man.
It's just like I've beenwaiting to make music like this.
I was since I was a kid, likeum, and I've been, I've been
dreaming of putting out uh anddoing it in this in this way,
(17:46):
man, uh, for a while, because Iwas, I had, I was always on a,
on a, on a fence about before,before I did this project I had
did.
The last thing was Time of myLife.
I think I had California upthere.
Like I said, it was produced byother people, but my journey of
(18:06):
man, of just like man, puttingout music that, I know, felt
authentic to me.
I I don't.
I didn't feel like I had donethat yet.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
So, um, been waiting for isthat like when I've been waiting
to put out music?
Speaker 1 (18:18):
okay, track three misguided misguided yeah, yeah,
(18:38):
all right.
So uh, track three.
Bro, misguided, what where youwas coming from on that track.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
Yeah, so with misguided man, it was everything
that I was telling you aboutman, just kind of.
I grew up misguided, no rolemodels, and you know what I'm
saying.
Nothing to model after man.
So misguided is that the chorustalks about.
I was a little misguided and alot more missing man.
I was out there out on amission, but that's really what
(19:05):
misguided is about talking aboutmisguided kids.
You know what I'm saying, justtrying to figure it out.
Okay, four change is like Isaid.
So everything I kind of toldyou from my little story that we
just talked about, I put all inthere man, about the life
before 16.
Change is that 15 year old kiduh, you know I talked about said
(19:27):
16 year old got them things onme.
16 year old got them chains onrun up.
You're going like, like goinglike 16-year-old in chains.
You know what I'm saying and Ijust talked about my whole
entire experience being lockedup.
You know what I'm saying Inchains All right, home now.
So once you get out of jail,you home now.
You know what I'm saying.
Yeah, is like cookout vibe,like you know what I'm saying.
(19:49):
You go, you know, after youleave, come home from deployment
, man, you know you want to seeyour people.
You know what I'm saying.
You want to connect, boom, boom, boom.
So that's really what home nowis, man, it's just like kiss the
mama, kiss my baby, kiss mylady.
You know what I'm saying.
I've been gone for a minuteTrack six, Mrs White, Ms White
bro.
(20:09):
Yeah, ms White man.
Ms White, ah man, if anybodyhas a praying grandma, you'll
really vibe with Ms White man.
So Ms White was my babysitter.
She was my first babysitter Iever had.
She took me in probably likenine months, but what was
(20:33):
beautiful about that about thatwas a prayer warrior.
So, um, I think miss miss whitesaw something about my life
before I did.
Um, miss white would literallyget the oil and put it on my
head and pray for me and allthat stuff.
Man and, uh, I would run, Iwould run.
She, when I start acting up,she like she.
She called me bud like bud.
You want me to go get the oil?
I'd be like, no, you know whatI'm saying, don't get it.
(20:54):
You know what I'm sayingBecause I knew you get the oil.
You're getting God involved.
I didn't want no parts of it.
But, yeah, miss White, shepassed away, you know, some
years ago.
I'm into the things I'm doingnow, right, but yeah, man, I
wanted to make a song that youknow that paid homage to white
(21:14):
stuff.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
That's dope.
That's dope.
The last track right.
Is there a finish?
Speaker 2 (21:19):
line, finish line, man, finish line is actually a
track that I had dropped a yearago, but I was.
I knew that this was all kindof in the works.
But finish line is that, man,we're all on our own race, we're
all on our own journey and youknow, we got to hit that finish
(21:40):
line, we got to follow through,we got to make it to the finish
line.
So that's what finish line isabout.
Man, I kind of go into, youknow just kind of, what my last
year has looked like.
Man, like I said, me and mylady have separated.
Man, I was freaking, staying inhotels and you know what I'm
saying Just trying to getthrough the trenches, man.
But ultimately, man, I got tomake it to my finish line, I got
(22:04):
my own race that I got to runRight.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Yeah, what do you feel about the marriage?
Well, how do you feel about themarriage?
Well, how do you feel aboutmarriage?
Congrats on being married too.
Oh, thanks, bro, because Iremember you came to me and was
like, bro, yeah, what'd you tellme?
You was like, bro, I'm about toget married, I said.
He said don't do it.
Don't do it you sure?
(22:28):
Yeah, I said are you sure?
Right, don't do you sure, Isaid.
I said I said are you sure?
Don't do it unless you, unlessyou know for sure, I'm sure.
Yeah, I love you, sure.
And he was like, yeah, I'm sure.
I said all right.
I said, just know, it's goingto be bumpy.
Yes, sir, you know what I mean.
And sure enough, bro, you wasright, it's real.
(22:54):
And I was like I told you.
Yeah, I was like I told you,but you know, I'm glad to see
y'all working it out.
Yes, sir, because I don't wishyou know what I mean divorce on
anybody.
Yeah, you know what I'm sayingand it's great to have a partner
man, I talk about it so much,but you know I'm divorced, so
(23:15):
it's like I try to give y'allthe game on what not to do yeah,
yeah, facts and how you can fixit.
You know what I mean.
Try to like be more proactivethan reactive.
Yeah, yeah, but how does itfeel to be married and I not
only went through a littleturmoil, but you're back at it.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
Man, it feels.
It feels great.
Man, I think marriage is aboutcommitment.
You know what I'm saying.
Growing up, I didn't see whatcommitment was, especially when
you ain't got a father.
You know, you don't seecommitment being shown in life.
So when you get married and youcan't leave, that's it.
(23:56):
You're gonna learn commitment.
So, um, marriage has beenprobably the greatest teaching
tool, man, for me.
Man, um, me and my lady are,we're just different.
You know what I'm saying.
She's she, she's's a pastor'skid from Canada.
I'm a, I'm a southern, southernboy with split parents.
Man, and it's easy to thatthose two things clash.
(24:22):
But we're learning.
We're learning how to how to,how to how to work together, man
, how to keep God in the centerof our marriage and how to how
to keep moving.
Man, I got a son who needs me.
I got a son who needs me.
I got a wife who needs me and Igot two daughters, who you know
who needs me.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
So yeah, man, yeah.
How does it feel to be a dadnow?
Speaker 2 (24:39):
man, oh man, let me sit up when I say this.
It's the best thing ever, man,yeah, man, if I would have own
having my son, man, he teachesme so much.
He teaches me so much, man,he's teaching me.
He teaches me a lot.
(25:00):
You know, we keep talking aboutGod, but to me he teaches me a
lot about that relationship withGod and son.
Like I know I can't do nothingto make God not love me, I see
that when I see my son Right,the boy just pooped on the floor
last week, yeah, I still lovehim.
(25:21):
The boy just put his leg in thetoilet yesterday, yeah, I still
love him.
You know what I'm saying.
The boy I was trying to.
You know I'm holding his handto take him across the street.
You know what I'm saying.
He want to pull away andliterally say, dad, let me go.
You know what I'm saying.
But he don't know I'm keepinghim safe, Right, that's what God
does.
That's that loving relationshipwith God, man.
So my son taught me everything.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Man, I say he's the biggest blessing man, the best
thing that ever happened to me.
My two kids, my girls, like itcalmed me down a lot, yeah, and
it had me, like, look back atwhen I was a kid, yeah, and was
like, damn yeah, I was like this, yeah, or dang yeah, was I this
(26:02):
expressive?
Yeah, like you know what I mean.
And then you start looking backand you're like, okay, yeah,
alright, you know what I mean.
And I was telling, like on thelast episode, go ahead, express
yourself, yeah, tell me, yeah,you know it's girls like you got
a son, so you know.
I mean he's going to get tothat point where he wants to
express himself.
Yeah, let me understand yourworld.
Yeah, I mean like it'sdifferent man yeah, things are
(26:22):
way different yeah, things aremore expensive, yeah.
So it's like you know, you lookat them christmas lists and
you're like where?
Huh yeah, he's one.
You want what?
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Yeah, he's one right now.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
So I'm grateful.
So you good, I'm good right now.
You good, you got about five,six more years, yeah, and he
gonna be asking for someoutrageous stuff, right?
You know what I mean?
Yeah, but my kids man, like,it's like I'm going to grind
forward, yeah, but at the sametime, I'm going to just make
sure that we're good.
Yeah, like everything's good.
(26:53):
Yeah, and understanding them.
You know what I mean.
Yeah, kids will definitelychange you.
Oh, they, oh absolutely thebest way.
Yes, the best way.
So it's no negative connotationtowards that.
Yeah, I mean my kids, man,bring the best out of me.
Yeah, I mean, and it's like youseeing it on a day-to-day basis
(27:16):
, like how fast they grow, oh mygosh.
Yeah, because you're going toblink your eye.
I'm going to give you anotherone.
Yeah, you're going to blinkyour eye and you're going to be
like I don't see 10.
You know what I mean.
Don't say that it happens sofast, bro.
Yeah, man, because look his son10.
Yeah, tootie, about to be 10.
I'm like, wow, yeah, my oldestabout to be 13.
(27:37):
I'm like I remember racing down95 from Jersey to make sure I
was at the birth.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
You know what I'm saying.
And it felt like yesterday andit felt like yesterday.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
I remember flying from Cali to get back to DC.
You know what I mean To see myyoungest born, and it feels like
yesterday.
You know what I mean.
And it's great, though, becauseit's like when you actually
chill with them, hang with themand watch TV with them.
Now they got opinions.
Yeah, that's where it's likedamn, yeah, like they really
like having conversations.
(28:08):
Yeah, and you know, mj, hegonna be talking like real
sentences probably when he'slike two or three.
Yeah, he gonna be looking athim like what?
Yeah, what made you like howyou think like that, bro man,
this boy yeah, he already.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
he's already on that vibe man.
He already saying he saywhatever you want to say, he
tell.
I mean I credit Miss Rachel, Idon't know, if y'all know who
Miss Rachel is.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
Miss Rachel, the truth.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
Yeah, miss Rachel is the truth.
Yeah, I owe her some childsupport she be watching my kid
for me.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Miss Rachel is amazing.
Yeah, she's dope, but watchhe's telling you what he want to
eat now.
Mm-hmm, watch when he starttalking about having.
He gonna have a conversationThree years old and you're going
to be like, oh, that's hisbrain, that's him.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
Yeah, you're going to be like what?
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Yeah, this is crazy.
Yeah, man yeah man Fatherhoodhas been the best.
I love it.
It is, I love it.
What's next for you, bro?
What's next?
Man you got a book coming up.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Yes, sir, yes, the waiting room.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Talk to me about it.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Man.
So the waiting room man, I hadhad somebody years ago ask me
was I ever going to write a book?
And I said, no, I'm not writinga book.
You know what I'm saying andI'll tell you the truth, man,
and I'll tell you how it cameabout.
But the last thing that waseven on my mind was writing a
book.
But yeah, I'm going to tell youhow that came about is, I was
(29:35):
literally sleeping.
I was in a dream and inside ofmy dream I was inside of a
waiting room and the cover ofthe book is actually what my
dream was Right.
So I'm in the dream and I hearGod say write a book.
And I was like no, like, firstof all, all I ain't got enough
(30:02):
life experience to write a book,yeah, I ain't made it yet.
Like, like, I don't know, likeI gave God all of these excuses
why I couldn't do what he toldme to do inside of the dream,
and um, but I heard back thatnow, yeah, but okay say no more.
But okay, say no more Say lessLike say no more, I ain't got
nothing.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Say less, yeah, I ain't got nothing else.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
So I woke up from that dream and sometimes, man,
sometimes when I dream you know,if I don't remember it, then to
me it doesn't matter but I wasdriving later on that day and it
popped back into my mind andI'm like, okay, let me take that
serious.
(30:41):
And that's really where it camefrom.
It's out of my dream.
Like I said, I was out of thiswaiting room and on the walls.
In the dream I saw the waitingroom on the wall.
So I'm like, okay, that's whatit is.
So I tried to make the cover asbest depicting that dream as I
possibly could.
But basically, what the waitingroom is about, man is, um, when
(31:03):
god gives you a promise, youknow, when god tells you like,
hey, something's gonna happen inyour life, like, um, this is
gonna happen.
From the time he gives you that, the time he delivers on that
promise, you're in the waitingroom.
You're in the waiting room.
You're in the waiting and a lotof us that's where I feel like
a lot of us are at we're in awaiting season to what we feel
(31:26):
like God is going to bring usinto or where God is staying to
us.
We can look at, like you knowin the Bible.
Look at Noah.
God told him to build his ark.
Look at, like you know in theBible.
Look at Noah.
God told him to build his ark.
It took 60, 70 years for thatflood to come.
From the first time he gaveNoah that hey, build his ark.
A flood's coming when thatflood actually came.
Think about that in betweentime.
(31:47):
What?
What did Noah go through?
He probably went through doubt,like, did God really tell me he
was going through this?
He brought his whole entirefamily on this thing.
He done, got all these animalsup here.
It's just 30, 30 years laterand there still ain't no flood.
Right 40 years later, therestill ain't no flood.
But god was preparing.
God was preparing noah.
God was preparing whatever forthat time.
(32:08):
Um, so that's really what thewaiting room is about.
Man is just like what do you doin your time of waiting, when
you're waiting god to deliver onyou?
Speaker 1 (32:19):
know nice.
Are you gonna do an audiobookfor it too?
Speaker 2 (32:22):
um, so I think it is, I think it does.
It comes out on kindle and itcomes out on amazon.
I want to say that there'll bean audiobook for it too I mean,
if you haven't recorded it, ohthen maybe not yeah, okay but
you can just record it, yeah,record the readings of it.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
I might need to get on that, because that's what I'm
big on audiobooks.
Yeah, because you know, I'malways in the whip, I'm always
in the car.
You know what I'm saying.
I'm always doing something,yeah, so I think the best way
(32:56):
for me to like hear a book, I'dvisualize it right then read it
and visualize, okay, yeah, I'msaying yeah, I think with me
with audiobooks, because I canhear where, where, where you're
coming from.
Yeah, that person who, whateverauthor, okay, is giving me the
description of it, or like, forinstance, um charlamagne, um,
his last book, uh, what is it?
Get honest or die lying wow,yeah, that book.
So like I can hear it in hisvoice on Get Honest or Die Lying
Wow, yeah, that book.
So like I can hear it in hisvoice on what he was going
(33:19):
through, what he was doingtherapy, that's dope, all of
these things.
And being truthful and honestabout his life, yeah, and I
think that was the dopest partof it, because I can visualize
it, I can see exactly where hewas at at these points and times
and these chapters of his life.
That's dope, and I think if youdo the same thing, that's going
to skyrocket you too.
(33:39):
Yeah, because what I noticedwith doing music, man, it's not
just music.
Right, you have to give aperson a vision.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:49):
It's not only the listening part.
The visual, yeah, it's theimagination, it's the creativity
.
Yeah, the visual it's theimagination, it's the the
creativity.
And I think if, when you stepoutside of the music and do a
book, that helps, like you'rebuilding your portfolio of you.
And that's why a lot of peoplewith me, they was like yo please
(34:10):
ain't doing music, no more,you're doing podcast.
I'm doing the same thing, right, never gonna stop music.
Yeah, but podcasting to me one,it helps me, they're
therapeutic to me.
Yeah, but sometimes I havethoughts and I want to get them
out Exactly.
So then when I share them withyou and you share me, your
thoughts, now we have aconversation and now it's more
(34:31):
of of like okay, I'm diving intoyour world, you're diving into
mine, so I can voice my concernor opinion or what I like.
There's different things and Ithink if you just do that for
your book the Waiting Room,which is dope to me because the
vision like I'm already seeingit, like you said, you was in a
hospital, in a waiting room.
(34:53):
The book on the desk said theWaiting Room.
The floor on the desk, yeah,said the waiting room, yeah.
Writing's on the walls, yeah,saying the waiting room, yeah.
And that's a heavy way to putthe concept because it's like
you're right, we are in awaiting, we're in a waiting
(35:13):
process.
Yeah, we are in a waiting.
Yeah, in a waiting process.
Yeah, when I'm gonna get tothat music exactly.
You know what I'm saying whenI'm gonna get to that when I'm
gonna get to that that, yes, Ifinally made it exactly.
But when I'm gonna get to that,yes, I finally made it on the
podcast.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
Yeah, you know what I mean and what is what's
happening right.
So when you get there, yeah,man, I got better because of
this.
I got better because of that.
No, I got better because of thetime that I had to wait.
You know what I'm saying.
How many no's, how many no's,exactly how many no's.
Like the process, man, and Iwrote about it in a book.
(35:45):
The process is so important.
Sometimes we do.
We want that immediate life,instant gratification.
We want that instantgratification.
We want instant gratificationout, we want to make it, we want
to.
But what, what like?
But the journey that that gotyou to that place, man, is
everything right.
Like you know and I'm gonna gobible one more time man like
david, you know, david wasanointed as king when he was a
(36:08):
kid.
Yeah, after he was anointed asking, as a kid, he didn't go and
start trying on robes andcrowns, he went back into the
field doing what he was doing,serving his purpose.
You know what I'm saying.
But if he would have steppedstraight into that role, it
would have killed him.
He would not have been able todo that, man.
So sometimes, when we havethese big dreams or these big
(36:29):
things, we're not even ready forit to be manifested, because
we've got so much characterbuilding, we got so much process
that needs to happen before weget to that place, and then he
gonna let you know when you'reready.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
You know what I mean.
So I learned that too.
Man, it's just don't be so in arush.
That's why I always tell mykids and anybody I was like yo,
slow down, calm down.
Yup, I was gonna, yo slow down.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
Yeah, yep, I was going to do that.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
Yep, that's why he went tripping.
Hmm, all right, back at it.
So for the audio book, I wouldsay, bro, just dive into it,
record it, yeah, and if you needhelp, let me know.
Yeah, and we.
(37:21):
You know what I mean.
You set it up and all you gotto do is just read your chapters
.
How many chapters you got?
It's eight chapters, eightchapters, yeah, okay, so it's
going to be a nice read, yeah,like straight to the point.
Straight to the point.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
Or straight to the point, it's only a hundred, a
little bit over a hundred pagesAbout two, two tick of a of a
read yeah, cool, cool, cool.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
Before we get out of here, I always do gym class.
Okay, gym class G-E-M Ooh, notG-Y-M, nice.
So what gym or gyms you cangive to the community, to the
relatives?
I call them the relatives.
Speaker 2 (37:59):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
What's that?
Relatives?
You know the family, yeah, sothe relatives.
What can you give the relativesout there in life?
Any gym that you think that canhelp them in their life?
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Let's see, man.
First of all, don't eat theyellow snow.
Second of all, um God first.
Third of all, man patient inthe waiting room.
If you grinding for something,go through the process.
Yeah, it'll make.
It'll make the other side worseit's yellow snow.
Speaker 1 (38:33):
Don't eat the yellow snow that one got me.
I ain't never heard that.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Hey, bro, it'll save you.
It'll save you a lot of time.
Yeah, it's a bad breath, man, Ipromise.
Speaker 1 (38:40):
Okay, all right yeah, all right, yeah, so don't eat
the yellow snow, don't eat theyellow sky.
First, guy first.
And and be patient in thewaiting room, be patient in the
wait.
Okay, all right, cool bro, butlike I always, man, I appreciate
you for coming.
Man, thanks for having me.
Congrats on your new drop, yourEP, life Before 16.
Life Before 16.
(39:01):
A waiting room book yes, sir,coming out.
Speaker 2 (39:04):
Yes, sir, when December 20th December.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
20th December 20th Okay so next Friday?
Yes, sir, so next Friday,December 20th, the Waiting Room
coming out.
yes, sir, good, all right.
Oh, hey, we back season two,episode two.
Uh, I go by the name of tweezy.
Y'all know who I am, but to theleft of me who I?
I got Got Brian Brian, who,johnson, brian Johnson, brian
(00:27):
Johnson, bro, what's good man?
What's up?
We was just chatting, talkingit up, man, how we like been
knowing each other for like overfive plus years, so you got
something new out, yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
I got a lot of things new.
I got new music out.
Yeah, I got a lot of things new.
I got new music out.
Yeah.
And man, we're coming up on abook.
Man, my first book coming out,called the Waiting Room.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
The Waiting Room and we're going to get on that.
But you got something calledLife After 16?
Life Before 16.
Life Before 16.
Yeah, let's talk about it man,let's do it man.
Life Before 16, man.
What inspired 416, man?
Speaker 2 (01:03):
what inspired you to create this EP, man so with Life
Before 16, man, it had beenfour years since I dropped the
project and I was just at aplace where, you know, so much
had happened, man I got married,I had a kid and, at the end of
(01:26):
the day, man, still, I still gota story to tell and, um, you
know, I I was like man, I needto keep, keep working on my
craft and keep working.
So I was at a place where I gotmy studio set up in my own, my
own spot.
I was like, let you know, and Ihad started producing myself
and all that, I was like, let mestart making music again.
Um, and it just kind of, justkind of took off from there, man
, yeah, took me a couple ofmonths to knock it out, man, but
(01:47):
life before 16 is just likewhat?
The kind of kid that I was, thekind of person that I was before
I was 16, man, I was a wild kidman.
My story's wild man, you know,was banging.
All that stuff Got locked upbefore 16.
Was banging, all that stuff gotlocked up before 16?
(02:08):
And, you know, before, before Iwas, before, I, you know, gave
my life over to god, man, I justwanted to put that project out
man and um continue to tell thatstory you know.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
So when you, when you say you was, you was uh banging
and all of that like what was?
What was a normal day like thatbefore 16?
Speaker 2 (02:23):
shoot.
So, um, normal day for me, manwas, was a was an easy wake and
bake.
You know, easy wake and bake.
Uh, go to go to school, gothrough the front doors, out the
back doors, and I failed myhigh grade year.
Um, that's because I skippedschool every single day.
(02:43):
Man met up with the homies youknow what I'm saying and just
and just did whatever, whateverwe, whatever came up to it, you
know, came on our minds and doman, right, right, right, you um
you was Crip Blood, I wasCripping it was Crips out here
yeah, man Crips, traveling manright, that's uh what it was.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Crips out here yeah, man Crips was traveling man,
right, that's uh what Iunderstand.
Like the, the um, I guess youcould say the teeter-totter or
the uh transition.
What is something you feel likeyou needed to change from?
(03:25):
You know going from banging andskipping school and you know
normal wake and bake, like whathit you and said, hey, let's
switch it up 15 years old.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
15 years old and your mother comes and visits you.
You're in a orange suit and youlook at her, looking at all the
stress that you're putting herthrough her hair thinning, you
giving your own mother her firstgray hairs.
You know what I'm saying?
Like that for me was kind of myturning point.
(04:02):
I'm like yo you really trippingbro you know what?
I'm saying Before then Icouldn't take any accountability
for what I was doing.
It was everybody else's faultaround me.
And just got to that place, man, where my mom was visiting me
in jail, I was like yo, this hasgot to stop.
You know what I'm saying.
So that's kind of what it wasfor me, man.
(04:24):
You know what I'm saying.
So that's kind of what it wasfor me, man.
Gratefully man and I say thisall the time being going to a
juvenile detention center at 15,best thing that could have
happened.
Why do you say that I wouldhave ended up in jail or dead?
You know what I'm sayingBecause I mean legit was.
I mean you name it.
(04:45):
I was doing it, bro, fromrobbing, killing, fighting.
I had three felonies and threemisdemeanors by the time.
I was 15 years old.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
Deep.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So there really wasn't too manyother options where I would
have ended up at if I would havekept going in that route.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Yeah, so did you have any, like I know.
But like you got siblings right.
Yeah, I'm the youngest andyou're the youngest.
Where were your older siblings?
They were brothers.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I got.
I got one older brother that'sin Georgia and I have another
brother that's in Texas and bythat time I was doing that stuff
.
They really wasn't around likethat and they out of the house
at that point.
But at that point me mom and Igot an older sister, who's you
know closer to age, but I didn'treally have, no, I didn't
really have no male role modelsthere to yoke me up Like yo you
tripping.
So you know what I'm saying.
I just kind of left my owndevices.
(05:39):
Where was dad at?
Pops really was never in thepicture man, he also lived in
Georgia.
He didn't really become.
He didn't really become likeverbally there, even like until
after I got out where we kind ofrekindled a relationship at
(06:03):
that point.
But before then he kind ofknocked off.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
So like, like, do you feel like um your brother's not
being there and your and yourfather not being there could be
like a a result of like how youwere acting?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
all right I so, in hindsight, it definitely wasn't
from my brothers, and mybrothers, at the end of the day,
they I can't put that on them,they're not, you know, they're
not my parent, but definitelypops not being there, for sure,
man, you, you, you know, my momused to always be like you know,
brian, why do you think you'relike that was kicked out of
school.
I got kicked out of everyschool I was in, oh, nine yards
(06:40):
man, and she would be like, isit because your pops been there
and I would?
I would have this, this very um, like nonchalant, like man, I
can't miss what.
I don't never had type of typeof vibe to it, but the whole
time I was bro, I was, I was, Iwas feeling the absence of that
(07:00):
structure not being there, thatcorrection not being there, that
discipline not being so, thatcorrection not being there, that
discipline not being there.
So I didn't know it, you knowwhat I'm saying.
I couldn't put my finger on itas a teenager, but yeah for sure
, that definitely, thatdefinitely had an effect.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Okay, now, looking back at it, I know you said you
don't think your brothers had.
It wasn't their fault, wasn'treally getting at it like that.
It's more like they're normallythe ones that are looking after
you.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Taking you under the wing andtrying to show you the rope,
(07:33):
yeah, but not having them there.
And then your dad and youseeing your mom, you putting
your mom through all that stresswhen you hit 15 in that orange
jumpsuit, that was the switch.
That was the switch.
So when you got out, what didyou do, bro?
Speaker 2 (07:50):
by the time I got, out man, it had been 13 months.
So I did 13 months in thepublic and then I went down to
Richmond and did nine monthsdown there.
But by the time I got out, bro,I was locked in.
I was 16 by the time I got out.
I did my prom at 14, got lockedin at 15, got out at 16.
(08:11):
So this is all kind of threeyears, two and a half three
years span.
I locked in bro to like by thattime I was praying.
So I'm like oh God, whateveryou want me to do, whatever you
have for me, I'm doing it.
You know what I'm saying.
I'm not going back to thestreets, none of that.
So all the people that I wasconnected with I dropped.
(08:33):
You know what I'm saying.
First day I got out, one of thebig, one of the big homies set
me up like yo, you still down,are you still banging?
And I was like no, like had tostraight up tell him no, you
know what I'm saying.
And the conversation went likethis Like where were you at the
last 13 months of my life?
I ain't get no letters from you.
(08:54):
I ain't get no, you know whatI'm saying.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
I was about to ask that too.
Yeah, like did any of them getyou up?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Nope, and you know what I'm saying.
When you growing up, you hearthat man, you hear folk talk
about they at you know I'msaying it was, and it was like
that, like right, like the onlypeople that was really writing
me was my mama, some shorty, youknow what I'm saying.
Like, but beyond, but beyondthat man, like the people and
(09:19):
folks that I was running aroundwith doing all that stuff, man,
they, there was nowhere to befound.
So when I got out, you want to?
You still down, you stillbanging, let's go do.
No, there's a no me.
You know what I'm saying.
So, um, you know, drop that.
And then, just I, I gotconnected to the church man,
which was the the best thingthat I think could have happened
.
Um, because it it gave me.
(09:42):
It gave me a reason to get up,gave me a reason to stay off the
streets, it gave me a reason tonot fall back into that same
cycle that I had been in priorto.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
You know, getting locked up, right right.
Well, church to me, man, I feellike a lot of your answers get
solved when you go to church.
Sometimes I think us as blackpeople, we kind of like kind of
try to steer away from it andtry to figure out our own our
(10:13):
own way.
Yeah, but we can't do it, yeah,we can't do it without the man
upstairs.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
I was.
So I was grateful enough thento where?
So my mom took me to churchgrowing up, but I was checked
out by the time I was eight,nine years old.
And here it is.
You got to have a.
You got to have a realrelationship, like it can't.
It can't be church, it can'tjust be you going to church and
listen to that, to the pastor,because if you ain't got your
(10:39):
own relationship with him, whathe's saying sounds like a
lottery ticket, you know whatI'm saying.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
It sounds like rambling a bunch of nothing Like
it.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Just it just don't, it just don't make sense, right?
So I was grateful enough towhere I had my, I had my own
relationship with God, to whereI was.
Like me, going to church was abyproduct, you know what I'm
saying, of my relationship withhim.
But you write them and I meanthat community, that faith, that
that what you need is it isfound, you know, right there in
that church.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Yeah, Because I mean, like for me, man, I just got
back.
Yeah, what was that?
Two months ago, kadeem, that'swhat's up, bro.
Yeah, like two months ago,that's what's up, bro.
You know what I mean.
Because it was like for me, itwas like, bro, I was lost.
Yeah, you know what I mean,because I did the Marine Corps
thing.
Yeah, you know, I made it backtwice, you know what I mean.
(11:32):
And my cousin Ro told me he'slike cuz, you know God, always
been with you.
I'm like, yeah, he been with me, but I ain't got no
relationship with him.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
Yeah, and I feel like you knowI needed me doing crashing out
and doing crazy stuff.
You know what I'm saying.
I'm like yo, I need to get myanswers answered and solved.
(11:55):
I need to go talk to him.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
So my best friend Quee, she introduced me you know
what I mean to her church.
Shout out to First Baptist,first Baptist shout out and from
there, man like I was going tochurch and listening and
everything that Pastor Jenkinswas saying it was hitting home.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
And when I looked I'm like man,yep, it's time, yeah, it's time
(12:23):
.
And then her mom like didn'tknow me from a can of paint.
Yeah, she prayed for me, likeshe's like, I just want to pray
for you.
I feel something from you.
I just want to pray for you,come on.
And I was just like, yes, no,yeah, she wanted me to go holler
.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
Yeah, holler at big God.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Yeah, so that's what I did, man.
I had my kids there.
Yeah, I relationship it's onyou you know what I'm saying to
build that relationship, but you, I'm bringing you with me, so
you, can see it.
Like I'm not giving up.
Yeah, you know what I mean,Because there's been times where
I was just like man, I don'teven know what I'm going to do
(12:59):
you know what I mean.
So it's good man in jail orwhatever and switching your life
around.
And I always tell kids, man,you never know Like they might
be going through something rightnow and when they see this,
when they drop, it might hitthem.
You know what I'm saying.
And I tell people all the timethere's nothing wrong with
having a relationship with God.
(13:20):
Nah, bro, I think that's thedopest thing to have.
You know what I'm saying.
That's going to defeat thepurpose of having that
relationship.
Yeah, I understand.
So that's that's.
I commend you on that for one.
Same to you bro, yeah,appreciate it and two like man,
you you always been a, aconnector, you and Frank man,
(13:55):
frank, like Frank, matter offact connected us.
He was like yo geez Holla atBrian man, he's dope.
But you and Frank man, y'allalways had that connection to
where it was always positive.
And I think that's what we'remissing sometimes in our
neighborhoods.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
Like it's positive.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
Everybody don't have to be sliding and doing all of
this negative stuff.
You know what I'm saying.
You still can do great thingsand still be dope out here.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
You can be yourself, man.
Yeah, be yourself and still,like you just said, be positive.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
Be positive, just be positive.
You know what I'm saying.
Yeah, and it's a lot of ways togo negative.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
It's definitely you can gonegative easy, and I always tell
my kids it's easy to get introuble, right, it's hard being
good.
Yeah, which one are you goingto do?
Yeah, you know what I'm saying,because the hard way ain't
(14:49):
going to get you nowhere andwhen it hit it ain't going to be
nice.
You know what I'm saying.
So, yeah, life before 16.
Yes, sir, you said you startedback producing because I was
going to ask you who produced it, because I listened to it.
Okay, I listened to it plentyof times, a couple times on the
way here.
Yeah, and I'm like who did thisproduction?
(15:09):
You know what I mean.
So you jumped back into yeah,that's me, man the whole joint,
the entire top to bottom.
How was it, man Like?
How was it getting back intothat realm of creating?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Man, oh my gosh.
So I'll tell you the truth, man, and I hit on it a little bit
in my book, but me and my ladyactually you know, me and my
wife actually separated.
We had separated for a coupleof months, man, and a lot of
people don't notice, but Iactually had moved.
I had moved out of the state,moved to North Carolina.
Yeah, I was doing the wholeco-parent thing for a while, man
(15:43):
, and during that time, man, Ididn't touch music.
I didn't touch music.
I was just down there grinding,man, make it back to the kid
whole nine yards.
And then, probably in May, weended up reconciling and I ended
up coming back home, like Isaid, the first thing that I did
was jump back into the music,into the craft, just got back
(16:08):
into it and, honestly, I waslike man, I felt like I had lost
it.
I was like man, I ain't, Idon't even know if I can do this
, blah, blah, blah and it justkind of.
I just kind of picked it backup where I left it at, man, um,
but yeah, man, I produced thewhole thing, man recorded it, um
, but it was, it was great.
Go the way that I created it.
You know the first track is usand I knew I wanted a synth to
(16:38):
introduce the project.
I don't know why, but I cameacross the synth.
I was like, okay, that's it,and it just kind of built from
there, man, and the rest of thetracks, man, just be kind of
exploring and coming across whatfelt good to me and just kind
of creating for me.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
So track two.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Been Waiting For.
Yes, sir.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
Where were?
What were you coming from?
What space you was coming from?
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Man.
So, with Been Waiting For man,that is like man, like this is
what I've been waiting for.
I've been waiting to make musiclike this, like all of my other
music before and there'snothing wrong with it was
produced by other people.
You know what I'm saying.
I got an amazing track with youthat was produced by you.
I got another project, but toreally like get to where I'm
(17:25):
producing my own stuff, writingmy own stuff, it just felt like
me.
You know what I'm saying.
Um, so I was like man, this iswhat I've been waiting for, to
put out music like this.
So that's kind of what beenwaiting for is man.
It's just like I've beenwaiting to make music like this.
I was since I was a kid, likeum, and I've been, I've been
dreaming of putting out uh anddoing it in this in this way,
(17:46):
man, uh, for a while, because Iwas, I had, I was always on a,
on a, on a fence about before,before I did this project I had
did.
The last thing was Time of myLife.
I think I had California upthere.
Like I said, it was produced byother people, but my journey of
(18:06):
man, of just like man, puttingout music that, I know, felt
authentic to me.
I I don't.
I didn't feel like I had donethat yet.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
So, um, been waiting for isthat like when I've been waiting
to put out music?
Speaker 1 (18:18):
okay, track three misguided misguided yeah, yeah,
(18:38):
all right.
So uh, track three.
Bro, misguided, what where youwas coming from on that track.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
Yeah, so with misguided man, it was everything
that I was telling you aboutman, just kind of.
I grew up misguided, no rolemodels, and you know what I'm
saying.
Nothing to model after man.
So misguided is that the chorustalks about.
I was a little misguided and alot more missing man.
I was out there out on amission, but that's really what
(19:05):
misguided is about talking aboutmisguided kids.
You know what I'm saying, justtrying to figure it out.
Okay, four change is like Isaid.
So everything I kind of toldyou from my little story that we
just talked about, I put all inthere man, about the life
before 16.
Change is that 15 year old kiduh, you know I talked about said
(19:27):
16 year old got them things onme.
16 year old got them chains onrun up.
You're going like, like goinglike 16-year-old in chains.
You know what I'm saying and Ijust talked about my whole
entire experience being lockedup.
You know what I'm saying Inchains All right, home now.
So once you get out of jail,you home now.
You know what I'm saying.
Yeah, is like cookout vibe,like you know what I'm saying.
(19:49):
You go, you know, after youleave, come home from deployment
, man, you know you want to seeyour people.
You know what I'm saying.
You want to connect, boom, boom, boom.
So that's really what home nowis, man, it's just like kiss the
mama, kiss my baby, kiss mylady.
You know what I'm saying.
I've been gone for a minuteTrack six, Mrs White, Ms White
bro.
(20:09):
Yeah, ms White man.
Ms White, ah man, if anybodyhas a praying grandma, you'll
really vibe with Ms White man.
So Ms White was my babysitter.
She was my first babysitter Iever had.
She took me in probably likenine months, but what was
(20:33):
beautiful about that about thatwas a prayer warrior.
So, um, I think miss miss whitesaw something about my life
before I did.
Um, miss white would literallyget the oil and put it on my
head and pray for me and allthat stuff.
Man and, uh, I would run, Iwould run.
She, when I start acting up,she like she.
She called me bud like bud.
You want me to go get the oil?
I'd be like, no, you know whatI'm saying, don't get it.
(20:54):
You know what I'm sayingBecause I knew you get the oil.
You're getting God involved.
I didn't want no parts of it.
But, yeah, miss White, shepassed away, you know, some
years ago.
I'm into the things I'm doingnow, right, but yeah, man, I
wanted to make a song that youknow that paid homage to white
(21:14):
stuff.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
That's dope.
That's dope.
The last track right.
Is there a finish?
Speaker 2 (21:19):
line, finish line, man, finish line is actually a
track that I had dropped a yearago, but I was.
I knew that this was all kindof in the works.
But finish line is that, man,we're all on our own race, we're
all on our own journey and youknow, we got to hit that finish
(21:40):
line, we got to follow through,we got to make it to the finish
line.
So that's what finish line isabout.
Man, I kind of go into, youknow just kind of, what my last
year has looked like.
Man, like I said, me and mylady have separated.
Man, I was freaking, staying inhotels and you know what I'm
saying Just trying to getthrough the trenches, man.
But ultimately, man, I got tomake it to my finish line, I got
(22:04):
my own race that I got to runRight.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Yeah, what do you feel about the marriage?
Well, how do you feel about themarriage?
Well, how do you feel aboutmarriage?
Congrats on being married too.
Oh, thanks, bro, because Iremember you came to me and was
like, bro, yeah, what'd you tellme?
You was like, bro, I'm about toget married, I said.
He said don't do it.
Don't do it you sure?
(22:28):
Yeah, I said are you sure?
Right, don't do you sure, Isaid.
I said I said are you sure?
Don't do it unless you, unlessyou know for sure, I'm sure.
Yeah, I love you, sure.
And he was like, yeah, I'm sure.
I said all right.
I said, just know, it's goingto be bumpy.
Yes, sir, you know what I mean.
And sure enough, bro, you wasright, it's real.
(22:54):
And I was like I told you.
Yeah, I was like I told you,but you know, I'm glad to see
y'all working it out.
Yes, sir, because I don't wishyou know what I mean divorce on
anybody.
Yeah, you know what I'm sayingand it's great to have a partner
man, I talk about it so much,but you know I'm divorced, so
(23:15):
it's like I try to give y'allthe game on what not to do yeah,
yeah, facts and how you can fixit.
You know what I mean.
Try to like be more proactivethan reactive.
Yeah, yeah, but how does itfeel to be married and I not
only went through a littleturmoil, but you're back at it.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
Man, it feels.
It feels great.
Man, I think marriage is aboutcommitment.
You know what I'm saying.
Growing up, I didn't see whatcommitment was, especially when
you ain't got a father.
You know, you don't seecommitment being shown in life.
So when you get married and youcan't leave, that's it.
(23:56):
You're gonna learn commitment.
So, um, marriage has beenprobably the greatest teaching
tool, man, for me.
Man, um, me and my lady are,we're just different.
You know what I'm saying.
She's she, she's's a pastor'skid from Canada.
I'm a, I'm a southern, southernboy with split parents.
Man, and it's easy to thatthose two things clash.
(24:22):
But we're learning.
We're learning how to how to,how to how to work together, man
, how to keep God in the centerof our marriage and how to how
to keep moving.
Man, I got a son who needs me.
I got a son who needs me.
I got a wife who needs me and Igot two daughters, who you know
who needs me.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
So yeah, man, yeah.
How does it feel to be a dadnow?
Speaker 2 (24:39):
man, oh man, let me sit up when I say this.
It's the best thing ever, man,yeah, man, if I would have own
having my son, man, he teachesme so much.
He teaches me so much, man,he's teaching me.
He teaches me a lot.
(25:00):
You know, we keep talking aboutGod, but to me he teaches me a
lot about that relationship withGod and son.
Like I know I can't do nothingto make God not love me, I see
that when I see my son Right,the boy just pooped on the floor
last week, yeah, I still lovehim.
(25:21):
The boy just put his leg in thetoilet yesterday, yeah, I still
love him.
You know what I'm saying.
The boy I was trying to.
You know I'm holding his handto take him across the street.
You know what I'm saying.
He want to pull away andliterally say, dad, let me go.
You know what I'm saying.
But he don't know I'm keepinghim safe, Right, that's what God
does.
That's that loving relationshipwith God, man.
So my son taught me everything.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Man, I say he's the biggest blessing man, the best
thing that ever happened to me.
My two kids, my girls, like itcalmed me down a lot, yeah, and
it had me, like, look back atwhen I was a kid, yeah, and was
like, damn yeah, I was like this, yeah, or dang yeah, was I this
(26:02):
expressive?
Yeah, like you know what I mean.
And then you start looking backand you're like, okay, yeah,
alright, you know what I mean.
And I was telling, like on thelast episode, go ahead, express
yourself, yeah, tell me, yeah,you know it's girls like you got
a son, so you know.
I mean he's going to get tothat point where he wants to
express himself.
Yeah, let me understand yourworld.
Yeah, I mean like it'sdifferent man yeah, things are
(26:22):
way different yeah, things aremore expensive, yeah.
So it's like you know, you lookat them christmas lists and
you're like where?
Huh yeah, he's one.
You want what?
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Yeah, he's one right now.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
So I'm grateful.
So you good, I'm good right now.
You good, you got about five,six more years, yeah, and he
gonna be asking for someoutrageous stuff, right?
You know what I mean?
Yeah, but my kids man, like,it's like I'm going to grind
forward, yeah, but at the sametime, I'm going to just make
sure that we're good.
Yeah, like everything's good.
(26:53):
Yeah, and understanding them.
You know what I mean.
Yeah, kids will definitelychange you.
Oh, they, oh absolutely thebest way.
Yes, the best way.
So it's no negative connotationtowards that.
Yeah, I mean my kids, man,bring the best out of me.
Yeah, I mean, and it's like youseeing it on a day-to-day basis
(27:16):
, like how fast they grow, oh mygosh.
Yeah, because you're going toblink your eye.
I'm going to give you anotherone.
Yeah, you're going to blinkyour eye and you're going to be
like I don't see 10.
You know what I mean.
Don't say that it happens sofast, bro.
Yeah, man, because look his son10.
Yeah, tootie, about to be 10.
I'm like, wow, yeah, my oldestabout to be 13.
(27:37):
I'm like I remember racing down95 from Jersey to make sure I
was at the birth.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
You know what I'm saying.
And it felt like yesterday andit felt like yesterday.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
I remember flying from Cali to get back to DC.
You know what I mean To see myyoungest born, and it feels like
yesterday.
You know what I mean.
And it's great, though, becauseit's like when you actually
chill with them, hang with themand watch TV with them.
Now they got opinions.
Yeah, that's where it's likedamn, yeah, like they really
like having conversations.
(28:08):
Yeah, and you know, mj, hegonna be talking like real
sentences probably when he'slike two or three.
Yeah, he gonna be looking athim like what?
Yeah, what made you like howyou think like that, bro man,
this boy yeah, he already.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
he's already on that vibe man.
He already saying he saywhatever you want to say, he
tell.
I mean I credit Miss Rachel, Idon't know, if y'all know who
Miss Rachel is.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
Miss Rachel, the truth.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
Yeah, miss Rachel is the truth.
Yeah, I owe her some childsupport she be watching my kid
for me.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Miss Rachel is amazing.
Yeah, she's dope, but watchhe's telling you what he want to
eat now.
Mm-hmm, watch when he starttalking about having.
He gonna have a conversationThree years old and you're going
to be like, oh, that's hisbrain, that's him.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
Yeah, you're going to be like what?
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Yeah, this is crazy.
Yeah, man yeah man Fatherhoodhas been the best.
I love it.
It is, I love it.
What's next for you, bro?
What's next?
Man you got a book coming up.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Yes, sir, yes, the waiting room.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Talk to me about it.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Man.
So the waiting room man, I hadhad somebody years ago ask me
was I ever going to write a book?
And I said, no, I'm not writinga book.
You know what I'm saying andI'll tell you the truth, man,
and I'll tell you how it cameabout.
But the last thing that waseven on my mind was writing a
book.
But yeah, I'm going to tell youhow that came about is, I was
(29:35):
literally sleeping.
I was in a dream and inside ofmy dream I was inside of a
waiting room and the cover ofthe book is actually what my
dream was Right.
So I'm in the dream and I hearGod say write a book.
And I was like no, like, firstof all, all I ain't got enough
(30:02):
life experience to write a book,yeah, I ain't made it yet.
Like, like, I don't know, likeI gave God all of these excuses
why I couldn't do what he toldme to do inside of the dream,
and um, but I heard back thatnow, yeah, but okay say no more.
But okay, say no more Say lessLike say no more, I ain't got
nothing.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Say less, yeah, I ain't got nothing else.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
So I woke up from that dream and sometimes, man,
sometimes when I dream you know,if I don't remember it, then to
me it doesn't matter but I wasdriving later on that day and it
popped back into my mind andI'm like, okay, let me take that
serious.
(30:41):
And that's really where it camefrom.
It's out of my dream.
Like I said, I was out of thiswaiting room and on the walls.
In the dream I saw the waitingroom on the wall.
So I'm like, okay, that's whatit is.
So I tried to make the cover asbest depicting that dream as I
possibly could.
But basically, what the waitingroom is about, man is, um, when
(31:03):
god gives you a promise, youknow, when god tells you like,
hey, something's gonna happen inyour life, like, um, this is
gonna happen.
From the time he gives you that, the time he delivers on that
promise, you're in the waitingroom.
You're in the waiting room.
You're in the waiting and a lotof us that's where I feel like
a lot of us are at we're in awaiting season to what we feel
(31:26):
like God is going to bring usinto or where God is staying to
us.
We can look at, like you knowin the Bible.
Look at Noah.
God told him to build his ark.
Look at, like you know in theBible.
Look at Noah.
God told him to build his ark.
It took 60, 70 years for thatflood to come.
From the first time he gaveNoah that hey, build his ark.
A flood's coming when thatflood actually came.
Think about that in betweentime.
(31:47):
What?
What did Noah go through?
He probably went through doubt,like, did God really tell me he
was going through this?
He brought his whole entirefamily on this thing.
He done, got all these animalsup here.
It's just 30, 30 years laterand there still ain't no flood.
Right 40 years later, therestill ain't no flood.
But god was preparing.
God was preparing noah.
God was preparing whatever forthat time.
(32:08):
Um, so that's really what thewaiting room is about.
Man is just like what do you doin your time of waiting, when
you're waiting god to deliver onyou?
Speaker 1 (32:19):
know nice.
Are you gonna do an audiobookfor it too?
Speaker 2 (32:22):
um, so I think it is, I think it does.
It comes out on kindle and itcomes out on amazon.
I want to say that there'll bean audiobook for it too I mean,
if you haven't recorded it, ohthen maybe not yeah, okay but
you can just record it, yeah,record the readings of it.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
I might need to get on that, because that's what I'm
big on audiobooks.
Yeah, because you know, I'malways in the whip, I'm always
in the car.
You know what I'm saying.
I'm always doing something,yeah, so I think the best way
(32:56):
for me to like hear a book, I'dvisualize it right then read it
and visualize, okay, yeah, I'msaying yeah, I think with me
with audiobooks, because I canhear where, where, where you're
coming from.
Yeah, that person who, whateverauthor, okay, is giving me the
description of it, or like, forinstance, um charlamagne, um,
his last book, uh, what is it?
Get honest or die lying wow,yeah, that book.
So like I can hear it in hisvoice on Get Honest or Die Lying
Wow, yeah, that book.
So like I can hear it in hisvoice on what he was going
(33:19):
through, what he was doingtherapy, that's dope, all of
these things.
And being truthful and honestabout his life, yeah, and I
think that was the dopest partof it, because I can visualize
it, I can see exactly where hewas at at these points and times
and these chapters of his life.
That's dope, and I think if youdo the same thing, that's going
to skyrocket you too.
(33:39):
Yeah, because what I noticedwith doing music, man, it's not
just music.
Right, you have to give aperson a vision.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:49):
It's not only the listening part.
The visual, yeah, it's theimagination, it's the creativity
.
Yeah, the visual it's theimagination, it's the the
creativity.
And I think if, when you stepoutside of the music and do a
book, that helps, like you'rebuilding your portfolio of you.
And that's why a lot of peoplewith me, they was like yo please
(34:10):
ain't doing music, no more,you're doing podcast.
I'm doing the same thing, right, never gonna stop music.
Yeah, but podcasting to me one,it helps me, they're
therapeutic to me.
Yeah, but sometimes I havethoughts and I want to get them
out Exactly.
So then when I share them withyou and you share me, your
thoughts, now we have aconversation and now it's more
(34:31):
of of like okay, I'm diving intoyour world, you're diving into
mine, so I can voice my concernor opinion or what I like.
There's different things and Ithink if you just do that for
your book the Waiting Room,which is dope to me because the
vision like I'm already seeingit, like you said, you was in a
hospital, in a waiting room.
(34:53):
The book on the desk said theWaiting Room.
The floor on the desk, yeah,said the waiting room, yeah.
Writing's on the walls, yeah,saying the waiting room, yeah.
And that's a heavy way to putthe concept because it's like
you're right, we are in awaiting, we're in a waiting
(35:13):
process.
Yeah, we are in a waiting.
Yeah, in a waiting process.
Yeah, when I'm gonna get tothat music exactly.
You know what I'm saying whenI'm gonna get to that when I'm
gonna get to that that, yes, Ifinally made it exactly.
But when I'm gonna get to that,yes, I finally made it on the
podcast.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
Yeah, you know what I mean and what is what's
happening right.
So when you get there, yeah,man, I got better because of
this.
I got better because of that.
No, I got better because of thetime that I had to wait.
You know what I'm saying.
How many no's, how many no's,exactly how many no's.
Like the process, man, and Iwrote about it in a book.
(35:45):
The process is so important.
Sometimes we do.
We want that immediate life,instant gratification.
We want that instantgratification.
We want instant gratificationout, we want to make it, we want
to.
But what, what like?
But the journey that that gotyou to that place, man, is
everything right.
Like you know and I'm gonna gobible one more time man like
david, you know, david wasanointed as king when he was a
(36:08):
kid.
Yeah, after he was anointed asking, as a kid, he didn't go and
start trying on robes andcrowns, he went back into the
field doing what he was doing,serving his purpose.
You know what I'm saying.
But if he would have steppedstraight into that role, it
would have killed him.
He would not have been able todo that, man.
So sometimes, when we havethese big dreams or these big
(36:29):
things, we're not even ready forit to be manifested, because
we've got so much characterbuilding, we got so much process
that needs to happen before weget to that place, and then he
gonna let you know when you'reready.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
You know what I mean.
So I learned that too.
Man, it's just don't be so in arush.
That's why I always tell mykids and anybody I was like yo,
slow down, calm down.
Yup, I was gonna, yo slow down.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
Yeah, yep, I was going to do that.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
Yep, that's why he went tripping.
Hmm, all right, back at it.
So for the audio book, I wouldsay, bro, just dive into it,
record it, yeah, and if you needhelp, let me know.
Yeah, and we.
(37:21):
You know what I mean.
You set it up and all you gotto do is just read your chapters
.
How many chapters you got?
It's eight chapters, eightchapters, yeah, okay, so it's
going to be a nice read, yeah,like straight to the point.
Straight to the point.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
Or straight to the point, it's only a hundred, a
little bit over a hundred pagesAbout two, two tick of a of a
read yeah, cool, cool, cool.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
Before we get out of here, I always do gym class.
Okay, gym class G-E-M Ooh, notG-Y-M, nice.
So what gym or gyms you cangive to the community, to the
relatives?
I call them the relatives.
Speaker 2 (37:59):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
What's that?
Relatives?
You know the family, yeah, sothe relatives.
What can you give the relativesout there in life?
Any gym that you think that canhelp them in their life?
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Let's see, man.
First of all, don't eat theyellow snow.
Second of all, um God first.
Third of all, man patient inthe waiting room.
If you grinding for something,go through the process.
Yeah, it'll make.
It'll make the other side worseit's yellow snow.
Speaker 1 (38:33):
Don't eat the yellow snow that one got me.
I ain't never heard that.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Hey, bro, it'll save you.
It'll save you a lot of time.
Yeah, it's a bad breath, man, Ipromise.
Speaker 1 (38:40):
Okay, all right yeah, all right, yeah, so don't eat
the yellow snow, don't eat theyellow sky.
First, guy first.
And and be patient in thewaiting room, be patient in the
wait.
Okay, all right, cool bro, butlike I always, man, I appreciate
you for coming.
Man, thanks for having me.
Congrats on your new drop, yourEP, life Before 16.
Life Before 16.
(39:01):
A waiting room book yes, sir,coming out.
Speaker 2 (39:04):
Yes, sir, when December 20th December.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
20th December 20th Okay so next Friday?
Yes, sir, so next Friday,December 20th, the Waiting Room
coming out.
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