EP2 - Introducing Ola: Finding Hope in Stories of Struggle

What happens when life throws you challenges that seem insurmountable? Ola Moore, host of "Releasing Her," invites you to explore a journey of resilience, strength, and self-discovery as she shares her deeply personal story. Growing up in Grover, North Carolina, Ola faced a childhood marked by complexity and adversity, from navigating child abuse and toxic relationships to living with multiple sclerosis. Yet, through candid storytelling, she reveals how these experiences have forged her path toward emotional and mental recovery. Ola's narrative is not only a testament to the power of vulnerability but also an invitation to find joy in mindfulness and solace in spirituality.

Join Ola as she reflects on pivotal moments that shaped her desire to make a positive impact, particularly influenced by her brother's battle with addiction and the loss of her father. She explores how these events spurred her to embrace her own inner strength while balancing it with grace and compassion. Through the metaphor of a cruise ship navigating turbulent waters, Ola emphasizes our shared human experience and encourages listeners to release what holds them back. This episode is a heartfelt reminder that, together, we can find strength in our imperfect journeys and emerge as the people we were meant to be.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
My name is Ola Moore and you're listening to
Releasing Her.
Join me as I share my journeyof overcoming trauma, the power
of resilience and self-discovery.
My hope is to encourage andempower one to not give up.
Are you ready to heal andreclaim your power?

(00:22):
If so, let's be vulnerable andgrow together as we are
Releasing Her.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
Welcome back to Releasing Her podcast.
I'm Olamore.
Today I'm going to try to makethings light, as I am in the
process of trying to get thecourage to put my quote unquote
cape back on and dive into someof the deeper, darker episodes

(00:54):
that I have in store in regardsto my grieving.
So today I'm going to take thetime to make it light, a little
cheery hopefully and discuss andgo over who is Ola Moore?
Who exactly are you listeningto?
So I made a short interview ofmyself and here we go.

(01:15):
You may ask who exactly is OlaMoore.
You don't have to, because Ialready asked myself why would
anyone want to hear what I haveto say?
For some time now I've sharedsnippets of my life to people

(01:36):
I'm close with, and sometimesstrangers, if I felt like it
helped and, surprisingly, thefeedback I've always gotten is
share your story.
Someone needs to hear whatyou've been through.
I am from a small town calledGrover, north Carolina.

(01:57):
Some may see the signs if youride 85 north from Atlanta.
We had no stoplights in oneschool, which was the elementary
school.
I grew up running aroundoutside barefoot and, yes, I ate
grits and cornbread.
I do consider myself a countrygirl that is well-educated and

(02:24):
mannered.
I'm just a regular person thathas realized that my struggles
may help someone.
I have a fur baby named Charlie, who you may hear from time to
time because she doesn't like tolet me cry too much.
I consider myself a positiveperson and most people that I

(02:45):
know would say that I'm alwayssmiling.
I learned real early to focuson the positive and not dwell on
negative things.
That's all I had sometimes, youknow.
So, moving forward, today, I'mgoing to continue with this
interview and I ask myself whatwould most people think that

(03:13):
they know about Ola?
I believe most people would saythat I had a good life, being
that I grew up in a two-parenthousehold, again, graduated from
college, had a good career andI own my own house.
Those are really superficialand looks can be deceiving.

(03:36):
Yes, I have all those things,but the house I grew up in was a
tale of two parents, but thehouse I grew up in was a tale of
two parents.
I had a father who loved andadored me, and his unconditional

(03:59):
love was never a question.
Then there was my mother.
I know she loved me, but shedidn't know how to love me the
way I need it.
Her love was like giving me acouple full of water and what I
needed was the whole bottle.
At some point.

(04:22):
To me it just seems like shegave up and tapped out of being
a parent.
I cannot speak for my other twosiblings, but that's how I felt
.
I didn't grow up like thehustables, but more like the

(04:45):
brown version of the Connorsfrom Roseanne, with snippets
from Mommy Dearest from time totime.
I am not currently married.
Even with that and what I'vebeen through, I would definitely
love to be married and become amother.

(05:06):
I'm just a natural nurturer.
I've been told plenty of timesthat I should have been a nurse
or a teacher.
My heart aches for those inneed and I can always see the
good in anyone.
At times it feels like that canbe a blessing and a curse.

(05:28):
As you will later find out, mypast has affected my timeline to
become a wife and a mom.
So this smile that I carry onmy face every day is genuine and
I earned it.
My smile is like my reward.

(05:50):
Many have tried, but no one cantake that from me.
The next question I ask formyself, for you, is why did I
choose the topics for thispodcast?
I chose these topics becausethey are what I am dealing with

(06:18):
as an adult and what I havedealt with as a child.
Have dealt with as a child.
My trauma is from the childabuse and neglect from my
childhood, toxic relationships.
As an adult and being diagnosedand living with a chronic

(06:39):
illness, which is multiplesclerosis.
And for a lot of people rightnow, this may be the first time
that you are finding out that Ihave MS.
I always just want everyone tosee me healthy and not weak, and

(07:03):
for those that are dealing withany health issues, you
understand that.
So now you know, I look backand I'm able to identify that I
was depressed a lot as a child.
Given my environment, I alsoexperienced depression after my
MS diagnosis Losing many lovedones, dreams that fell to the

(07:29):
wayside, lots of relationshipsand even jobs.
Recovery is something that I'mdealing with every day.
I did have the courage to askfor help.
I practiced mindfulness andself-awareness.
My relationship with God hasalso given me the strength to

(07:53):
not give up.
Now I could say I have fullyrecovered from all that.
I've been through that I'vebeen through, but I am able to
be honest and transparent withmyself and say I'm just a work
in progress.
Mental and emotional wellnesscan pretty much include all that

(08:19):
I have just mentioned.
This is something that I alsowork on daily, or at least try.
I always strive to be my bestemotional self.
You know, keeping a smile on myface is not easy.
I just want to maintain the joythat I've been given and earned

(08:42):
as I share my stories, andmaintain the joy that I've been
given and earned as I share mystories.
I will not only include whatI've gone through, but I can
reflect on what seemed to behappening to my parents, to my
friends and siblings.
I was telling my therapist theother day that I'm just tired of

(09:08):
always being the responsibleone but yet Always also get the
short end of the stick.
I'm tired of always beingstrong and I get to the point.
You know I just want to live.

(09:29):
Breaking cycles is a topic thatresonates with me.
I personally refer to it asbreaking generational curses.
That phrase, I know, is talkedabout a lot among African
Americans, especially inchurches.
So for those that are notfamiliar, when I say curse I

(09:52):
just mean bad habits or behaviorthat has been passed down from
generation to generation, andsometimes the people who have
raised us have unknowinglyplanted those habits in us
Because that's all they know.
And personal development thereis so much from keeping fit

(10:15):
eating habits, appearances andjust being healthy and fighting
this god awful sweet tooth Iinherited from my father.
It's not as bad as it used tobe, but every once in a while I
do want a cookie and I actuallywill drive to get to it.

(10:36):
And then there's finances, fromgetting out of debt to trying to
build that generational wealththat I desire for my family,
especially the children I knowand those in the community.
Unfortunately, childhood traumahas also affected my

(10:56):
relationship with money.
So I go to my next question Ola, what is your hardest challenge
?
My hardest challenge is justtrying to not let myself become
my worst enemy.
It's funny because I tellpeople this all the time.

(11:18):
I know it's a lot like callingyou know the old saying the pot,
calling the kettle black.
You see, when I was younger myparents had a lot on their plate
dealing with my older brother.
Unfortunately, he went down apath that my parents did not

(11:41):
prefer.
He went down a path that myparents did not prefer.
He got in a lot of trouble athome, at school, just in general
.
Basically he had a drug habitthat began at an early age and

(12:02):
it just seemed like once hestarted spiraling out of control
, he couldn't stop Seeing that,as a child, did something to me.
It's funny how children thinkthis because I took on that
burden of not being anotherburden ironically, especially to
my dad.
My father had so much to dealwith with my mom, my brother,

(12:26):
and still tried to be a supportto the family and friends he
grew up with.
So in my head as a child I justwanted my dad to see I was okay
.
I kind kinda felt like if mydad would've seen me break down

(12:50):
or if I told him that I neededhelp all the times that I did,
it would've some way made himless assured of himself.
I know it's crazy, but I feellike I needed it in some way to
protect him.

(13:12):
Having that mindset, I just didnot ask for anything.
When I was asked, ola, are yougood?
I would always respond and sayyes, I got it.
I think really a lot of it wasjust the environment and some

(13:42):
was my personality was just theenvironment and some was my
personality.
I remember my mom was tellingme a story of me trying to walk
and she was trying to help me.
She said that I had snatched myhand and told her that I got it
.
As you see, I put my cape on asa super woman as a very, very

(14:12):
early age, and the cape grew asI got older.
I know for me the cape can bestrengthening and a hindrance at
the same time.
So when those times arise andI'm weak, it is hard to give

(14:37):
myself grace and compassion foranybody out there that feel the
same way.
When you agree.
My next question, ola, what haveyou learned about yourself
recently?
Now we'll say to this questionI answered this a year ago, so

(14:58):
I'm gonna read through it and Iinterject as needed.
I have.
Well, I've learned a few things.
I should have been in therapysooner rather than later.
I still agree with that.
Living through a lot of griefhas made me realize how short

(15:21):
life is, and I'm not one to putit with a lot of things like I
used to.
Unfortunately, sometimes a partof you dies as you lose someone
or something, and I can saythat's true for me and that

(15:42):
still applies.
Since I lost my father, I knowthat I want a strong man in my
life that can lead, protect andprovide, like he did trust me.
My daddy made sure that I wasvery independent and friend for
myself.
So a strong man is a want, nota need.

(16:04):
Okay, yes, I've learned thatI'm a lot stronger than I
realize.
For those that work out, it'slike going to the gym and
someone asks you to max out onthe exercise, like bench press
or squats.
You know you start and when youget past a certain weight

(16:27):
you're like oh my god, I didn'tknow I was this strong.
I've always known that I was astrong person, confident in
myself and very independent.
But over the last couple yearsI've had to learn who I am again

(16:47):
.
I had to really step back andsay who do I want Ola to
represent?
When people look at me or hearmy name, what do I want that

(17:08):
first thought to be?
I'm going to pause for a second, not necessarily pause.
I'm gonna pause for a second,not necessarily pause, but just
I want people to see me and hearmy name and say if she did it,

(17:30):
I can do it too.
If Ola went through that, I cando it too.
If Ola went through that, I canmake it.
That's why I'm here, sorry.

(17:50):
Next question, Ola whatmotivates you To get up in the
morning?
Just the simple fact that godblessed me with another day.
I can wake up every morning andsay god has something for me to
do, so I'm supposed to touch alife some way somehow.

(18:13):
And, yes, I get caught up inthe everyday hustle and bustle
quote unquote but at the end ofthe day, I want to be able to
contribute to the world andleave my footprint.
When my alarm clock goes off inthe morning, I pray, I thank God

(18:35):
for waking me up and I also askhim to put people or situations
in my life that is going tohelp fulfill the purpose that he
has for me, because withoutthat, everything else doesn't
make sense.
And my next question, ola, whatis one final thought that you

(19:08):
want to leave with yourlisteners?
And the only thing I can say isI'm just me.
This podcast, once again, isnot polished and I will have
hiccups.
I just want to be a messengerwhen you have those days or

(19:29):
random thoughts of not again.
Why me?
Or why can't I just catch abreak, as I've done myself so
many times in my life andsometimes?
it happens several times in aday or week.

(19:50):
I know that the details and thecircumstances may be different,
but I want to say this it'slike us being on a cruise ship
no matter what room or level youand I may be on, we're in the

(20:14):
same boat or somewhere you know,maybe in the boat with me, and
we're gonna ride this outtogether.
Hopefully, you can listen to mystories and relate, so that you
know you definitely know thatyou're not alone and that you're

(20:39):
not the only one.
Every time you tune in, I wantyou to release A little bit Of
whatever is holding you back, sothe real you Can be released,
and I say that to you as I'msaying it to myself Are you

(21:04):
ready to release her?
Bye.