Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
And just by just by ticking off 1 littlepercent per day, we can get closer and closer
to it and the by the time you know it, you'llactually achieve what you wanted to.
So, yeah, I very resonate with that very muchresonate with that quote.
Are you ready to unlock your full potential andachieve your personal, professional, and
financial goals.
(00:20):
Welcome to remarkably simple.
The podcast dedicated to helping you do justthat.
I'm Monique Fields, and I believe that with theright strategies, anyone can achieve remarkable
results.
Whether you're a seasoned leader or juststarting a business.
This podcast is your guide to achieving yourgoals with simplicity and efficiency.
Let mark on this journey together and makesuccess simple.
(00:46):
Hi.
Welcome to this episode of remarkably simpleI'm excited to introduce you to my guest, Luke
Kingston.
He has many different things to many differentpeople, a brother, a friend, a coach, But what
separates Luke from others is what he standsfor.
He places heavy emphasis on self developmentgrowth and discovery.
(01:08):
Luke challenges himself daily through hisdedication and commitment to martial arts and
fitness always seeking new skills and knowledgeand pushing his limits through challenges and
competitions.
He does this while staying true to himself andspreading positivity to everyone he meets,
encouraging those around him to become morefulfilled versions of themselves.
(01:30):
This would not be possible without Luke'srelentless work ethic.
He aspires to get better every day.
And his discipline and sacrifice to improvementhas resulted in the creation of his coaching
business, which is committed to helping youbuild the bulletproof mindset that will become.
(01:52):
Self awareness.
Luke, thank you so much for joining me.
Thank you so much, Monique, for thatintroduction.
Yeah, pleasure to be here.
So I would love if you could, Just help us getstarted and give our audience a little bit of a
context for your background and the work thatyou're doing today.
(02:14):
Yeah.
So I guess it started a little while back in2022 is when I pulled trigger, and I really
said to myself, you know, what?
You've gotta do something with your life here.
And, before that, I was working in a prettyfamous Pop Chain in the UK.
I'm from the UK in London, calledWeatherspoons.
(02:37):
And I used to work there as a manager in chargeof the people, the training, and and and stuff
like that.
And that was my my favorite part of thebusiness, the training, helping people
progress, and the customer complaints, and thedealing with the plates, and the the food, and
the people, the com all the people the thecontractors, that side of thing.
It wasn't for me, but what I did find joy inthat within that business was the people side
(03:03):
of things.
And one day, I was kind of having aconversation with what the one of the customers
there called Cyrus who now is a very goodfriend of mine.
Who introduced me to life coaching, and he knewI was kind of in in and out with the training
and whatnot.
And he thought I would be good at life coachingand introduced me to a course with the Mo
(03:26):
Foundation, which is a charity that, gives lifecoaching courses And I I thought to myself, you
know what?
Why not just give it a go and and see how itgoes?
So I I went on the course was probably one ofthe youngest there.
Actually, I probably was the youngest there.
Very uncomfortable, but the more I got to gotto know the people around me, got to learn, the
(03:51):
the skills of coaching, the skills oflistening, the skills of asking questions,
structuring, helping people in a different kindof way.
Because I always saw myself as a person who wasgood to give an advice, but not as a person
that would actually know how to help them in ain a structured way, in a professional way.
And coaching gave me that.
And, yeah, ever since I completed that course,I I I feel like I saw the light, and I I I saw
(04:17):
my light and I went to get accredited.
My credits are coaching certifications.
I essentially didn't look back and and now I'mcreating my my personal business coaching
business, Kingston coaching.
I've I've helped a lot of youth, organizationswhat I'm doing right now.
(04:38):
And later this month later this year, sorry, Iwill be starting to go into into prisons to do
some coaching as well, which I'm very excitedabout.
So that's where I'm kind of at right now, andthe future has a lot of coaching for me, I
think.
Yeah.
So I love how you relate that you were in aleadership position.
(04:58):
I'm guessing you got there because you werereally good at your job focused, dedicated, and
bringing good energy to the work.
So you didn't know from outside of that rolethat maybe that just was not the way that you
were bent, but I also love how you relate thatbeing in that role really had a benefit for you
because it helped highlight and allowed you tosee how much you really enjoyed serving people.
(05:22):
It sounds like it also perhaps gave someone whowas close to you the ability to see, this this
special spark that you had for serving otherswhere they made this suggestion that you
explore live coaching.
So I, you know, a lot of times when we are inthis place where we are serving and helping
(05:45):
others, to realize their fullest potential andaccomplish their goals.
I think it can be balanced with the personalchallenges that we have.
And I wonder how much your own individual workas a coach comes into play with the work that
you do with other people and how it is that youspeak about that.
(06:09):
Yeah.
So I guess I've had a lot of challenges, goinginto this space and and kind of throw myself
into this space.
I feel like one of those major challenges thatthat I thought that I, had was imposter
syndrome going into it.
And I think it's one of the things that a lotof people go through in in any path.
(06:32):
It's it's at the start.
You're not really fresh with what you're whatyou're talking about, what you're doing, and
you kind of feel like an outcast in the placethat you want to be.
And it's a very normal thing.
The the more I speak to people nowadays is isis is it's I'm finding that it's more and more
people going through the same thing, and it'sjust about navigating how to how to kind of
(06:55):
control those those those bad feelings insideof you, which could be seen as a positive
feeling as well because it's kind of where youwant to go.
So
Yeah.
I agree that the thing that you you you getthis message perhaps your body in a sensation
or from your mind in a, you know, a fearfulthought or self doubt, but that we sometimes
(07:18):
read those messages the wrong way.
We read them to mean we should retreat, that weshould retract, that we should slow down, that
we should stop, or go in a different direction.
And often, those, are prompts that let us knowthat we're headed in the right direction,
right, that they are mis mistaken for the kindsof messages and intuition that we receive when
(07:40):
we really are headed in the wrong direction.
When you it's like how you know you're gettingoutside of your comfort zone and that you're
growing when you're presented with this thesesensations that feel like this is
uncomfortable.
I I don't I don't feel comfortable here.
Right?
So having pushed through that, you've developeda passion and a focus for youth.
(08:04):
And you said that you're going to be, workingsoon in prisons.
I would love if you would just relate some ofthe things that you're seeing that youth are
struggling with and what it is that you teachor do to help them.
Yeah.
So I would definitely say, well, we can startwith imposter syndrome.
I we kind of touched on that, and it's one ofthose things where the person really wants to
(08:30):
do something with their life or wants to take astep in the right direction, but they don't
have enough evidence to support taken thatstep.
And I think it kinda links to that fear ofthere's a lot of different kind of fears.
There's fear of the unknown, the fear offailure, the fear of judgment, the fear of
success, even.
And all of these different types of fear arestuff that can hold us back because we don't
(08:56):
wanna, we don't wanna mess up.
We're kind of wired in a way to, to wanna beperfect, even though no one will ever perfect.
I will never be perfect, and I will say thathappily.
But the but what we need to work on is justconsistently trying to improve ourselves and
learn from our mistakes reflect and and learnfrom from what we've done maybe wrong in the
(09:18):
past because that's what's truly gonna make usgrow.
And relating that to the to the young peoplethat I work with, I feel like there's a lot of
pressure that they put on themselves to to dowell.
And they don't wanna let said maybe familydown, friends down, people around them that
maybe they feel like have a certain perceptionof them.
(09:41):
And taking that step might be it might it mightpush them in the right direction, but it might
have maybe a negative or or a setback in a waythat that can come from it so they don't wanna
go through that.
And maybe they haven't faced enough advice inthe past to know that they can actually get
through the the said uncomfortable situation.
(10:02):
And that's where maybe I would come in to to,you know, question them on any limited beliefs
that they may have because limited beliefs area real thing.
I've had them, a lot of people around me, hadthem.
I think everyone has some form of limitingbelief in their in their life, and it's about
working through them and understanding wherethey come from and how we can manage them
(10:25):
because, yeah, managing those those thoughtscan sometimes they can come out of nowhere They
can be distorted and they can be not fact, butthey can sometimes bring us down a little bit,
so it's about managing.
So you talk about those thoughts that can benot fact.
And I agree with you that in coaching youencounter, It sometimes is easier to help see
(10:48):
the very convincing, but not necessarilyaccurate thinking in someone else, and it's a
more, challenging practice, or you need to beconsistent with the practice order to develop
the ability to catch your own thinking when youare having those misleading thoughts.
But something you said earlier about the workthat you do with young people that very often
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they can't access or find enough examples orevidence of times when they have been
successful at a particular thing.
And I I don't know if you find this to be true,but I've observed that very often, as you said,
we're conditioned to find the evidence of whatwe can't do.
And I think it takes intentional training andpractice to learn to search for evidence that
(11:35):
we can.
And quite often it's just this simple shift in,you know, the the practice that you're working
with someone that they are building up the casefor the evidence of this thing that they feel
imposter with, and reinforcing for themselvesthis this belief.
But, I I don't know about you.
(11:56):
I learned that this comes from action that, youknow, our our tendency is to wait to hold back.
We think we're not ready and that when we'reready, we'll start doing the things, but it's
actually the reverse that we start doing thethings, and that's how we get ready.
Yeah.
I 100% agree with you on that one.
It's it's something that I had to learn thehardware.
(12:18):
I also thought that wasn't a hundred poundready, so I would put things off.
And then when I realized that I was taking theaction and I started to, then things were
actually going better for me.
And you can kind of look at it as, like, aglass of 4 and a glass of empty.
And a lot of the people A lot of people in theworld view the world as a negative place and
(12:42):
negative negative things happen, and they'reright.
Negative things do happen, but I I also believethere's an abundance for everyone to achieve
everyone, everything that they want oreverything that they desire.
And it's just about, like you said, taking theaction.
And by taking the action, you will feel a lotmore comfortable with the next step and the
(13:05):
next step and the next.
And Yeah.
It's until you do take the action and and anddo what you need to do, you're you're not gonna
feel ready.
No no one's ever gonna feel ready.
I wasn't ready to to to jump into a into acoaching role.
When I first started, but I had to throw myselfinto that kind of deep end in a way and and
(13:30):
learn how to swim.
I love when you talk about this analogy becauseif this, episode catches the ears of anyone who
worked with me as a teacher, when I was aschool administrator, this is an analogy that I
used very often that we needed to be the kindsof coaches who would put our students in the
deep end of the pool, And perhaps, yes, withthe little floaties on, but not on the edge
(13:52):
holding on to the side of the pool andpracticing our kicks, right, that we we would
we would develop that competency, the wholecompetency, much more efficiently, effectively,
and quickly if we have to do it in the fullcontext of the work.
So, when you relate this back to something likethe work that you and I do with coaching, it
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absolutely is true that at some point, you putthe textbook down and you have to reach out and
say to people, this is how I can help and offerwhat you can, but you also make this really
important, you know, analogy about one step ata time.
It's we're often thinking about the target.
And perhaps we want to function at a 100% andbe offering the best services out there.
(14:39):
But we won't ever get to that that place, if wedon't start where we are and improve
incrementally, whether it's at 1% or 2% or 3%with each action, But I I recently heard, one
expert who encourages people that he works withto make the target to improve by 1% every day.
(14:59):
Now when I heard someone say 2%, I was superexcited.
I thought everybody can make a 2% increase.
Everyone can improve by 2%.
Everyone could also improve by 1%.
And for those of us who have, you know,exceptional dreams and standards in like to
challenge ourselves, and we can set our targethowever we want to set our target, right?
But the key is about consistently taking thosesteps, and those actions that you're inclined
(15:25):
to do that really build toward the goal thatyou've identified.
And I think if you're helping Youth do this atwhatever age they are.
This has to be setting them up for success, andthat brings me to ask you the question about
any examples, for those of us who are dedicatedto and passionate about the young people and
(15:46):
the next generation, What are some examples of,for lack of a better word triumph that you're
seeing by applying these strategies with, youngpeople that you work with?
Yeah.
I I would definitely share 1, but I just wantedto quickly, just on your point of the 1%.
I I bit my tongue when you said that becausethat's something that that I really live by.
(16:08):
And I I try my best to to get hold of people tosee it as well.
The improvement of the 1% daily.
Because I just feel like there's the goals thatwe put out for ourselves are so high, and
there's so many steps that we need to gothrough.
And just by just by ticking off 1 littlepercent per day, we can get closer and closer
(16:30):
to it.
And by the by the time, you know, you'llactually achieve what you want too.
So, yeah, I very resonate with that very muchresonate with that quote.
What you just said and I want you to share theexample too, but this made me think about some
because very often it's the inaction that keepsus from achieving the goal.
We start out making improvement by 1%, but Ithink that 1% gets compounded like most things
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over time.
When you're consistently, let's say that 1%looks like, improving your morning routine.
And I'm waking up with a specific intention towhat I like to call win the day.
And you have, particular strategies that you doto set yourself up for that.
For some people that looks like putting yourclothes out at night so that you're not having
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what I used to have, which is closet drama, Ican never side what I want to wear in the
morning.
There are too many choices.
I'm foggy in the brain.
I need to do it in the night.
And, you know, maybe that look like waking upfirst thing in the morning and having that goal
for the day as your intention and it expressinggratitude and getting up and taking on the day
(17:34):
with that attitude.
Well, at a certain point, you're not spendingenergy, producing that action in the morning,
it's like automatic.
So you get to take leaps.
It starts out as 1%.
That's all that you need to do to keep movingforward and improving, but I don't think that
it stays at 1%.
(17:54):
I think that over time, that 1% naturallyincreases because of the power and the
foundation that you've laid with thosepractices that you really, have embedded into
your routine and your character and yourattitude so that they are changing who you are
when you show up as a better person and you'reimproving by 1% It's really more than 1% is the
(18:15):
point that I wanna make.
And I think that that is, I'm I'm glad to hearthat that resonates with you because I think it
is so simple.
Very often, we are, making the goal so big inour mind that we tell ourselves it's not
possible.
When in actuality, not only is possible.
It's simple.
All we have to do is just get started doing thepart that we can right away.
(18:37):
Yeah.
Momentum.
Yes.
Absolutely.
Perfect word.
So tell us about examples where you get to seethis happening with young people, which is
really exciting.
Yeah.
Thinking back to I'm gonna share my my secondmy second client ever.
Who I met through a networking group, who was16 17 at the time, very socially not socially
(19:07):
awkward, but very socially shy and timid, andhis communication skills weren't the best.
And he didn't feel like he knew what he wantedto do in life.
He was quite smart and he he he didn't wannarebel against a school system or anything, but
he knew that his his his call in wasn't, say,academics.
Mhmm.
And he he came to me, and and I'm and we workedthrough a lot of different exercises.
(19:33):
We but the main philosophy was the philosophyof action, and the philosophy of taken
consistent steps week in week out.
And by the end of the 3 the 3 months that wespent together, he was essentially a complete
different person.
And they got to about the, like, the 8th or 9thsession out of 12, and he sent me a message
(19:54):
saying how he dealt with the situation.
How he would have dealt with how he would havedealt with the situation if he didn't of didn't
change his sort of personality or hiscommunication skills, and he was very proud to
sort of know that he he did change, and he didgoing through uncomfortable situations of
(20:16):
talking to different people, trying out newtechniques.
And we just recently had a FaceTime call Ithink a month or 2 ago, just a catch up, and he
then also sort of thanks me again, and and kindof told me about all the good things that will
happen in his life and all the opportunitiesthat he's got from these better communication
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skills.
And and now he's he's about to finish his alevels, which is just before you turn 18 in the
UK.
And he's got, like, role model sort of roles inschool ways mentoring and coaching the younger
children now, which I've just kind of, like,fulfills my heart and to know that he's doing
good things in his life.
(20:58):
So, yeah, I'll I'll mention him.
So this is such a great example of the powerthat each person holds by just becoming aware
of not only their patterns, but also theircapability.
It's like he's holding these 2 things, and heremembers vividly his old way of being and is
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now so consistently choosing this other optionthat he sees is accessible to him.
I I genuinely love that in a coachingrelationship, you have the opportunity to
partner with someone that you don't get todecide what their future is.
He's writing back to you, you know, monthsmonths or years years later to tell you about
(21:43):
what he is choosing for himself.
Right.
But that you got to participate in creatingthat space where it was safe for him to try out
this new identity, this new way of being thathe obviously had entertained and in some way
hoped for but perhaps didn't exactly know howto access.
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And now he owns it, which is so exciting.
I don't know this person, and I'm just, youknow, like, vibrating with chills, just
thinking about what it means to be, insecureand feeling inadequate wherever that's gonna
take you and instead being the leader ofyourself and now turning around and
(22:27):
facilitating as a mentor the same experiencefor people younger than you, which is I think
exactly what those of us who hope the best forthe world want to see happening around us.
Yeah.
I agree.
And one of the questions that I always ask mymy clients or my coaches, at the start is if
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you don't say when we spoken about the idealfuture and what they want for themselves and
the idea of entertainment and what they desire,it's what what will happen if you don't go and
take the action now?
And I guess the the answer is pretty simple.
Nothing changes.
And when when the person kind of realizes thatif they don't actually take action and not and
(23:11):
nothing will change, will they be happy withthat kind of life?
And for for Ben's sake, it was it was no.
He didn't wanna be the same and and and stay inthat in that mindset or that that insecure,
way, but he he took action.
He worked on himself, and he became a 10 xbetter version of himself, which he is he's
(23:40):
truly proud of, and that wasn't because I toldhim what to do because that's not what I do.
It's because I was there.
I listened to him.
I I asked him questions that were thoughtprovoking and opened ended, and it kind of
helped him to find his own but he said his ownpath, his own destiny, and and he's still on a
a a massive journey of in in his life, but henow has the tools to to navigate a lot better
(24:05):
than if he didn't make the change in thebeginning.
So, yeah, and I'm very proud of him.
We could just piggyback off of each other onand on.
You just mentioned that the concept to next,which I think is all around the world that's
used in a variety of different ways, but itjust made me think about when we talked about
the practice that you do at the beginning ofyour coaching relationship, which is I would
(24:27):
say it's standard for you know, good coachingthat we just get clear on who you are and what
you want.
Right?
What what is it that you truly desire.
But I love that you ask him the question.
You ask him to visit the place, the worst casescenario, as I like to call it, as I've learned
to call it.
What it looks like if that is what happens.
(24:50):
If if it doesn't go well, if, you know, youtake no action, whatever that worst case
scenario looks like for you, and you startedout by envisioning what would be the best case
scenario.
So the math or or doing the math, right, forlife would be estimating the difference course,
(25:12):
it would be fantastic to achieve exactly thevision that you have or better.
But I think when we talk about the 10 xconcept, Whether you hit the exact target or
you surpass it is irrelevant because you areleagues beyond where you would have been if you
chosen if you had chosen to take no action orjust resigned to stay exactly where you were,
(25:34):
and that's so powerful.
But this is an example of what we justdiscussed.
About this compounding over time.
This now eighteen year old has these toolswhere he understands the power of his awareness
of himself, He has practiced with you callingout his insecurity and challenging himself to
step beyond those.
(25:55):
He practicing what it means to turn back andget even stronger with these skills by
supporting someone else as a mentor, and he hasthe rest of his life ahead of him.
To continue taking exactly these 2 things.
What do I really want?
What would happen if I choose to say exactlywhere I am?
At the at, you know, every crossroad from nowon.
(26:15):
And that to me is so fascinating becausethere's just, I'm gonna make up a word.
Maybe it is a word.
But inestimable potential for his team.
I locked up.
Yeah.
I just think that is so, exciting for me.
And I was just having a conversation with,someone in a consultation the other day, we
(26:38):
were talking about how You know, sometimespeople say life is a journey.
And for instance, for for sure, it takes alifetime to live, right?
But the change of a direction That's instant.
We can instantly change and decide justdeciding, do I want to stay the same or do I
want to improve?
(26:59):
And it's just that simple.
The rest, 1% at a time.
Staying the same?
Maybe it doesn't even require 1%.
It's easy.
Just be a couch potato.
So I think this is so so lovely and we havebeen talking for a little bit but one of the I
have a a question that I wanna ask you is wewrap up because it's a sort of futuristic one.
(27:21):
But tell me where would people find you if theywanted to know more about lieu and the the
services that he offers for children.
I'm over here in, the United States and you'rein the UK.
Perhaps people want to know how they would workwith you online, or what types of services you
offer?
Yeah.
So I do a lot of different type of things,predominantly coaching, for young people
(27:46):
anywhere from 15, 16 to about 30, and I havecoached people order than that as well.
And where you can find me is you can find me onmy website, www.kingstoncoaching.org.
And I also put out I've just recently put out afew YouTube videos as well on YouTube Kingston
(28:06):
Coaching, and I post oninstagramkingston.coaching, and I'm on LinkedIn
as well.
So you can find me on those kind of platformand Kingston Coach and Luke Kingston will
probably be there somewhere.
Yeah.
That's fantastic.
So You told us at the start of our conversationthat one of the things that you're excited
(28:27):
about that's coming for you in the future issome work in prisons.
And I don't know if it's appropriate for you todetail the kind of work that you'll be doing or
just what it is that you're after by targetingthose individuals.
But it's very intriguing to me as, I've hadvery close family members, parents who were
(28:47):
young people, and, you know, fell into, habitsor practices that landed them learning some
hard lesson, so to speak, So I would love tohear about what it is that you, are up to or
after with, the project that's gonna bestarting in later part of the year.
(29:07):
Yeah.
So I recently just completed my training.
So, essentially, how it works is we do a veryWe deliver a very powerful 3 day workshop
called the hero's journey.
The hero's journey is quite a, popular in in inthe book or in movies, but it's it's about self
(29:28):
awareness and it's about change.
And it's about understanding that change isalways happening, and it will never stop.
And it's about embracing the change andaccepting the change rather than, Nick acting
it or declining it.
And there's very personal exercises there thathelp you to understand who you are better.
(29:49):
Within a group, within, like, a a safeenvironment, even though it's in the prison is
in a an enclosed group with with a safeenvironment led by myself and another workshop
facilitator.
And then after that, we do, one to one coachingfor the participants of that workshop.
If if if they desire, if they don't, thenthat's fine.
(30:11):
And the way our coach, the the prison, thepeople, the prisoners, will be the exact same,
my coach.
Anyone else, it's I I won't judge them.
It's it's it's more about finding what theywant for themselves, seeing where they are
right now, and what's the action that they needto take And the reason that I wanted to do this
(30:33):
was because I wanted to work with people thatno one was to work with And growing up in
London, I've been around a lot of differenttype of people.
Some people that have been down, led down thewrong path.
And I kind of can resonate with how it goeslike that and how it is.
So I wanted to be a part of the change, and Ifeel like if, if and when I can go there and
(31:00):
deliver change and help someone turn their lifearound, that will just add to to my
fulfillment.
It's it's it's it's kind of a selfish way ofsaying I wanna make a change to make me happy.
Is it if if that's being selfish, then they'refair enough, but that's that's how it is in my
my heart.
Yeah.
I think, it's beautiful.
(31:22):
And the hero's journey sounds like a compellingway for an individual to experience
transformation and I think the context whereyou want to deliver that, the first thought in
my mind was that you had a captive audience andthat this perhaps you know, in a in a time of
isolation or hardship, loneliness, we can be,perhaps more reflective than at other times.
(31:46):
And I I then I challenged myself that thatenvironment really is not that that there are
conflicts just like there are in the worldoutside of those institutions, however
different and perhaps contained differently.
And you identify something very important thatperhaps every person who encounters this
(32:09):
training is not going to be, ready or willingto to make to make that transition and to do
the work, which is exactly the same as with youand I, ultimately our development, our life,
our thinking and way of being is our choice.
And, I think that it's very honorable that youare serving yourself in a way that, is really
(32:35):
all about empowering other people and helpingthem get access to the tools that they have to
be, really empowered in their own life.
And, thank you in advance for that.
It sounds very worthwhile and, again, honorableto serve individuals who perhaps are not on the
(32:56):
long list of agencies and organizations thatwant to.
Maybe even sometimes people have given up onthose being a worthy cause.
And, I look forward to being in contact withyou to hear how that's going once it gets
started.
Yeah.
It's gonna be a a a journey.
Absolutely.
(33:17):
So, this has been such an intriguingconversation.
And again, I look forward to, being able tofollow your work and hear more stories about,
the contribution that you are making to otherpeople's growth.
And I just wanna thank you for, taking thistime with me and sharing our conversation with
(33:39):
the audience who will listen today.
Thank you so much, Monique, for having me.
It was actually very, very fun for me to to behere today.
So, yeah, just wanna say thank you one moretime.
Alright.
Have a great day, everybody.