October 21, 2025 • 68 mins
This Evolution will be televised! Hello! My name is Jimmy Gonzalez and I am a Hypnotherapist, Energy Healer, Past Life Regressionist, Sound Healer, Mindset Coach, and a wonderful listener! WHY? Well, because I love people! I love story telling but I really enjoy listening to YOU! Not just about what is wrong with YOU but primarily what is right with YOU! These are the things that make us amazing, and these are the stories we should focus on! I started this show to inspire YOU! To make YOU think and to remind YOU that YOU are pretty BAD ASS! Well, YOU are! I produce, record all of my shows and I hope YOU like my show! If YOU do, please let me know what YOU think! If you don’t like my show! Please let me know! I love criticism!!! It is how I learn to better myself. :) If you do like my podcast I came across this service as a way for people to show their appreciation for my time. It is called Buy me a coffee! It is just as it sounds. If you would like to show thanks by listening to my podcast, I ask that you buy me a COFFEE! The link will take you to a site where you can do just that. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/noemahh Thank you for your support and please share my mission of inspiring you! If you would like to listen to my meditations, please visit: Mind’s Eye Meditations / @mindseyemeditation Subliminal Sessions • Subliminal Sessions Check out my first book! (Kindle version) Paperback is in the works for later this summer. You can download it right it now for under $5!!!! "The Reset Yourself Workbook"
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Please note this show contains adult language and themes and
is intended for mature audiences only.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Listener discretion is advised. Jerry Beloved, We're gathering here today
to get through this thing called like You are listening
(00:54):
to the Reset Yourself You Podcast with your host Jimmy Gunzolid.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Okay, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome.
Let me lower this Okay. In this weekly podcast, I
(01:18):
focus on sparking your inner confidence and igniting your belief
in yourself. I am your host of Gonzales, and I
am always extremely very thrilled to share my thoughts and
research with you as we go along on his journey together.
You I him can nurture a mindset that empowers us
to reach our fullest potential. I believe that I write
(01:41):
and record every episode to challenge our thinking and to
encourage us to reflect and inspire action. Were realistic thoughts
towards personal growth, whether you're facing your career transition, seeking
to overcome some challenge, are simply striving for great or
(02:01):
fulfillment in life. This podcast has been your go to
resource for motivation and practical insights for fifty nine countries
that's just I just looked that up. I was like, oh,
pretty cool, thank you. My inspiration to do this show
(02:23):
is to teach people to focus on more of what
they can can accomplish, so they do the things they
need to do when they need to do them, so
they ultimately get to do the things well, get to
receive the things they want when they want them. This
episode is dedicated to every single one of you and
(02:45):
your pets. Tell me what you want and I will
show you how to get it. The question is are
you willing to do the work? Seems to be such
an issue with many today today Today today, we are
tackling a topic that hits every single one of us. Worry.
(03:06):
But I'm not just gonna talk about worry. I'm going
to try to help you through it. That little voice
in the back of your mind whispering sometimes shouting about bills, work, relationships, health,
and especially all of the many what ifs in life
that don't even happen. Let's be honest, worry is a
part of being human. We all do it. We worry about,
(03:28):
like I said, our bills, work, the people we love,
and especially we're so good I mean, we are masters. You.
I know you are. You are a master of worrying
about stuff that you can't even control. And it's actually
not for you to worry about, but you so choose
to a little. Worry keeps us alert. That's fine, it's
(03:51):
our mind's way of saying, hey, pay attention. But when
worry becomes a daily soundtrack in your head and it's
just constantly worry, worry, worry, you wake up worry during
the day, it's filled with worry, and then you go
to bed and that you can't sleep, You toss and turn.
Why worry, and then it starts eating at you, eating
(04:15):
away at your piece, your focus, and even your health.
And that's scientifically proven. Finally, anxiety doesn't knock politely. When
it does, it just barges in uninvited and sits at
the table like it owns the place. Anxiety, depression, the past, anxiety,
the future. How could you be worried so much about
(04:41):
so much in the future. You don't know what's going
to happen in the future, so you're assuming that you're
going to feel You're assuming that you're going to do badly.
You're assuming that you're going to be sick, You're assuming
so you're going to allow yourself to worry, stress out,
and affect your health over something that hasn't even happened.
Instead of focusing on the present. You must learn to
(05:08):
be calm. You must learn to breathe. You must learn
to quiet the noise and take back control of your mind.
Coping isn't about pretending everything's fine. It's about learning how
to breathe through the storm instead of fighting against the
storm or running from the storm. Techniques like meditation, deep breathing, mindfulness,
(05:32):
those aren't just like new age wooy wooie words. Millions
of people and every year it grows, are using them
as anchors to help ground them because they realize the
most important thing in their lives is what their mind.
It's your mind. The more you practice these things, the
(05:56):
stronger your sense of calm becomes, and control over your
mind and the smaller problems actually start to feel. And
I improving that every single day you begin to realize
that most of what you worry about never even happens,
and when it does, they handle it because you've trained
yourself to face life with clarity and composure. This might
(06:19):
feel like something that's so unattainable, but do you all
know the word habit, correct habits. You guys know habits. Yes, okay,
it's creating a new habit. But the thing is, if
you think about it, whenever you think of habits. When
I had my office in Middletown and I had clients,
I would speak to them about I would ask them
(06:40):
specific questions in the beginning always, and one of them
was like, you know, what do you think of habits?
And I never had somebody say comparing the word habits
to good habits. It was always well over eating, over drinking,
over you know, smoking, pornography, spending too much money, gambling.
(07:00):
I'm like, you do realize that there are good habits?
And I would just get the stare. Really yeah, you
can create positive habits, positive habits of no longer being stressed,
positive habits of no longer worrying, positive habits of believing
in yourself, positive habits of waking up in the morning
(07:22):
and meditating, or just take one minute, sixty seconds, sixty
seconds when you wake up, you sit up in bed.
You don't get out of bed, don't put your feet down,
sit up in bed, look around the room and say
thank you, but be aware of it, feel it thank you.
(07:45):
You got up realizing that so many people won't, so
why you So you had the chance to get up,
so you can spend the rest of your day sitting
on your ass, watching mindless television and worrying about things
that may happen. That's a waste. Are you wasting your life?
(08:11):
I'm asking you, are you wasting your life? Right now?
Like even even with my podcast, it's funny, I have
I have a it's a growing group of people that
with my podcast, they will say, like, you made me
think or you made me realize certain aspects that I
(08:33):
never thought about, you know, and and and nothing that
I share it should be things that you're like, oh
my god. It should just be like he's reminding me,
or he's he's reframing a thought that I already knew,
but I just either forgot or I allowed allowed my
life to get lost. So I'm just like you know,
(08:54):
see me as in the type of the light top
of a lighthouse with just a light shining, go hey,
I'm over here. Here's reality. You don't have to live
in fear. You don't have to have bad habits. You
choose these bad habits and then you do them enough
and to become a habit. So you know, just like
with smoking and weight loss, I've had clients through hypnosis
(09:17):
end them immediately one session, couple sessions, and then what
we do is revisit it with positive habits to replace
that time that habit. You begin to realize that most
of what you worry about was a waste of your time.
(09:40):
I mean, I don't know about I don't know, but
I assume I would like to think that your time
is very, very valuable, It's very important. Why would you
want to waste it in fear? Because understand, fear isn't
just like I feel fear and that's that. No fear,
You feel it, and then it affects your body, It
(10:01):
affects your diet, it affects your health in general. Why
do you want to hurt yourself? Because that's what you're
doing when you're fearful, you're hurting yourself. And said you
handle it, you train yourself to face life with clarity
and composure. So the question isn't how do I stop
worrying completely? That's life. It's how do I learn to
(10:23):
live peacefully even when worry comes knocking. That's what we'll
talk about. We all worry. Like I said, I worry.
I mean it would be kind of weird. Worry is important.
Worry is there's danger. Okay, flight, fight, fight or flight,
but not you have a choice. You have worry, you
(10:44):
either fight or flight. You don't sit and just continue
to worry for six hours. That's not the way it works,
because that now it's proven scientifically, scientifically that that hurts you.
I don't care. If you're the calmest person in the world,
you still have things that press on your mind. It's normal.
(11:07):
In fact, worry has a purpose. It's our brain's way
of saying, pay attention, be alert. But like almost everything
in life, there's that tipping point when worry becomes a
constant companion, when it starts showing up at your dinner table,
in your dreams, or worse, as I said, impacting your health.
(11:28):
That's when it becomes just anxiety and anxiety left and
check doesn't go away. It multiplies and it multiplies and
it multiplies, and before you know it, it's stealing your
valuable peace time. So how do we face this? How
do we live in a world full of uncertainty and
(11:49):
still find calm? That's what we're going to talk about.
The first thing to understand is that coping with anxietnxiety
is not about ignoring it. It's not about pretending everything
is fine. In fact, pretending pretending only buries the worry deeper,
(12:12):
and before I know it, it comes back even louder. Coping
is about recognizing your anxiety and acknowledging and then learning
to mannagit. Imagine holding a rope tied to a wild horse.
You don't wrestle with the horse and try to pin
it down. You don't ignore it either. You learn how
to guide it, control it, and eventually ride it with confidence.
(12:38):
That's what coping with worry looks like. A powerful tool
for this mindfulness. Mindfulness is simply the practice of bringing
your awareness to the present moment. Sounds easy, right, Most
of our lives are always in the past or the future,
replaying regrets or forecasting disasters at me may happen. Mindfulness
(13:04):
teaches you to notice when you're spiraling into worry. It
allows you to step back and say, ah, that's just
the thought, but it doesn't have to control me. But
how do you start well? One of the simplest techniques
is breathing. Something that we do constantly, right, I think
(13:27):
you do. I mean I do. But it's not just
like breathing, as I say. It's actually sitting down somewhere
in your office, in the car and the train, go
and work anywhere in your backyard, in standing in the shower.
You don't even have to sit. You just take a
moment inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four,
(13:48):
pauls for four. That's called box breathing. What did he
just say, four four four four? Think about that? So
four you're counting number one two three four, So one
two three four. Now don't say the numbers, just you know,
(14:20):
see four counts in four counts, hold four counts out,
four counts. Pause, Repeat this just a few times, and
the many you feel danger, do that. Your heart automatically slows,
tension melts from your shoulders, and suddenly that worry isn't
(14:43):
that monster that's chasing you down. That monster was chasing
you now five minutes ago, it's no longer there. Another
important tool is perspective, seeing the danger. When anxiety grows,
it inflates problems until they feel completely and totally uncontrollable
(15:05):
and unmanageable. So step back out of your body almost
stand over there. See, the problem is in front of me.
I'm me. You're gonna take you and stand over there,
and you're gonna look at you from the side and
the problem. How likely? You're gonna ask yourself, how likely
is this worry to actually happen? What's the worst case scenario?
(15:34):
Can I actually handle that? You'll often find that the
thing you feared wasn't as big as your mind made
it out to be, and the thing that is real,
you can face it. You've done hard things before, trust me,
and you'll continue to do them again. That's a question
I have for my older listeners, and I'm like, you've
(15:55):
been living fifty sixty, seventy eighty years. By this time,
you should be a monk, because everything that's happening has
happened to you. Nothing is new. None of these fears
that I ask these people are things that are new
to them. They are things that have happened seven, eight, nine,
ten times over the past forty years, and they keep
(16:18):
getting out of it and they keep surviving it. So
when it happens again, by now you should be a
master of it and be like, oh, this is happening.
I'm prepared. There's no time for fear because I already
know what I need to do. I don't run from it,
I don't hide from it. Why do you keep hiding
from it? It doesn't help you, It hurts you. Like
you've ridden this rodeo a few times already, haven't you?
(16:42):
Are you still alive? Have you survived? Did anything happen?
Speaker 1 (16:46):
So?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Why would you continue to keep and saying I don't
know is not an answer. That's ignorance. Ignorance meaning you're
not looking it up, You're not asking true questions. Anxiety, boy,
things that happen happen makes problems feel completely unmanagement. It
(17:07):
really does. Professional help, psychiatrist, a psychologist, therapist, talk therapists,
hit and a therapist is part of coping. Talking with
a clinical psychologist or counselor, or a very good friend,
(17:29):
not an asshole. A good friend isn't a sign of weakness.
It's a sign of strength. It's like bringing in a
coach who can help you train your mind, develop strategies,
and give you tools that aren't always obvious, things like meditation,
structured mindfulness exercises, like the breathing that I you know
(17:51):
four four four four four four four four Box and
practical coping techniques can make a huge difference. Aren't you
worth it? The more you practice them, the easier it
becomes to perceive your challenges as manageable instead of overwhelming.
So instead of having the habit of something's going to
happen and I need to run and hide, you're like, no, oh,
(18:13):
It's time for me to practice my breathing. It's time
for me to make sure that I'm prepared. It's time
for me that I know exactly everything I need to do.
And before you know it, you realize there's nothing to
worry about. It's a waste of your time. A lot
of people get stuck thinking that stopping worry completely is
(18:35):
the goal. Wrong. You can't erase the human experience of concern.
Worry is natural, but you can learn to meet it
with calm, confidence, and clarity. You can create a mental
space where problems exist but they don't control you. They
don't dominate you. You can notice a worry, acknowledge it,
(18:57):
and let it pass like a cloud drifting across the sky.
Here's a practical way to start today. When you notice
yourself beginning to worry, write it down. Cheers, get a
pen and a paper and write it down. Seeing it
on paper helps your brain separate you from that emotion.
This is what's gonna happen, This is how I feel.
(19:20):
Then ask yourself, is this something that I can act
on right now? If yes, make a small plan. If no,
let it go for now. Tell yourself, I will revisit
this later as that worry comes closer for real. So
at least you're not worrying for the next four or
five six hours. You're training your mind to respond to
(19:41):
worry instead of reacting to it. We'll continue to explore
this in a minute.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
But.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
It's actually a tough, tough subject such a simple word worry.
Lifestyle choice, as daily habits and thought patterns all play
a role in managing anxiety. But for now, let's take
a deep breath, acknowledge your worries and remind yourself that
(20:10):
you are capable of handling more than you think, aren't you?
Aren't you capable of handling more than you think? How
old are you? Okay? That number is how many years
you've been alive? I think. I think unless you're like
three years old, you've accomplished quite a few things. You've
(20:32):
gone through a lot of doors. You've dealt with a
lot of assholes. You've had horrible moments, stressful moments, tearful moments,
painful moments, But you're still here. Think about that. Worry
doesn't just appear out of nowhere. That's not true. It
(20:55):
grows in the quiet corners of your day, the moments
when you're tired, oh, thinking, or running on empty. If
anxiety had a favorite food, it would be neglect. I'll
just put that, I'll put it over there and not
deal with it. When we neglect our body, arrest our peace,
that's when worries starts whispering louder and louder and louder.
(21:20):
So the first step in coping is to take care
of the machine you live in your body again. You
don't need to run marathons. You don't need to drink green,
nasty juice every morning with extra vitamins, or join a
gym and lift you know, a million pounds. You don't.
You just need to build consistency. A few minutes of
(21:43):
a few minutes every day of a walk, a stretch,
breathing fresh air can rewire your nervous system. When your
body feels strong, your mind follows suit If your mind
feels hazy, confused, that's probably what you're eating. And then,
(22:06):
of course rest sleep. Lack of rest is like leaving
your mind's front door wide open for worry to walk
in and make itself at home. If you find yourself
lying awake, replying today, replaying today, try this. Write down
your worries right before bed, right when you're going to bed.
I'm worried about this, I'm worried about that right down,
(22:27):
right next to your bed. Empty your head onto the paper.
It's not about fixing them right then. I'm not asking
you to fix them. I'm asking you to just dump them.
And then it's giving your mind permission to rest. You're saying,
I've put this somewhere safe, which I can do with
it tomorrow, and you will. It'll come back tomorrow, but
(22:48):
for the next few hours, hopefully as many as you can.
Now here's the part most people skip, which I mentioned
a little bit. Diet. Your body is a temple. Okay,
your body is a factory. Think of it just a factory.
Think of your body as a machine working all the cogs,
all the wheels. Everything is moving. What you consume, whatever
(23:12):
you eat mentally affects you. It's not just something you
eat and then you poop it out. That's not what's happening.
You have all these things in your body that need
nutrition and it affects you physically. Now here's the twist,
(23:34):
not just actual food, but constant news, social media, doom scrolling,
endless comparison to how everybody else in the world is
obviously doing a lot better than you. It all feeds anxiety.
I mean, if you are one of my wonderful listeners
(23:56):
that find yourself constantly complaining that you're poisoning your body.
If you start your day watching chaos, your brain believes
the world is chaos if you just focus on the
negative aspects of Like I think it's funny people will
say to me, oh, yeah, the world. You know, I
(24:16):
wouldn't want to bring a kid into this world. The
world is getting worse. And you know what's happening in
the it's like the world is ending and this and that.
You know, it's just, oh my god, things are just
it's the end of times. And then you have these stupid,
stupid people every couple of months, Oh the world is
coming to an end. On August thirteenth, Oh the world
is coming to end on January. Stupid people, you know,
(24:41):
it's funny, they say, and they get off on it
because all they're doing is creating fear for people that
are now flipping out. We have enough people dealing with
worry and fear and anxiety, and now let's put fear it,
which is what a lot of happens in social media. Fear.
Let's scare people. Think about it. If you start your
(25:04):
day complaining, and you go to bed complaining, and all
you do is compare how everybody else in the world
is doing better than you, and the world is coming
to an end because of the president or because of
who was president, or the president before him, or the
president before him. If you did some history, you'd realize
(25:28):
that this world has been in a lot worse situations
a lot, and we have survived. We do. That's one
thing about humans. I'll give you credit. We fight. We fight.
Guard your mental space. Read something uplifting, Listen to music
(25:52):
that feeds your spirit or sits in silence before you
invite the world into your mind to help poison it.
Another major player in coping is, like I said, routine.
Worry thrives an uncertainty, A routine gives your brain structure
and sense of predictability. Start small, small, small, a morning
(26:18):
ritual and evening wind down, even a regular time for reflection.
I have listeners that have told me what they do
is the last hour before they go to bed, no phone,
no TV, maybe some soft music in the background or silence.
I personally I love I prefer I like silence. I
like silence when I'm meda take, but I prefer soft
(26:40):
music in the background. In my room, I have a
noise machine that plays a sound of crickets always. Everybody's different.
Soft light in your house, not cold lighting's it affects
you start your morning slowly, cup of tea cup of coffee.
(27:05):
Actually you should always start with a cup of water first.
But you're not one of these people that you get up,
you race for the house because you're running late because
you overslept because you hit the stupid button sixteen times,
and then you're running through the shower, and then you're
getting to work, and chances are you're probably gonna have
a shitty day because that energy that you created. Not
(27:27):
I'm late because of work, No, you're late because you
chose to not wake up a half an hour earlier
to give yourself ten minutes. Notice, whenever I talk, it's
never like an hour, two, No, ten minutes, five minutes.
My Monday morning meditations, I have people there on Monday,
and I have people that it's religious. They will play
(27:47):
because now there's one hundred and yes of yesterday, one
hundred and seven. I think one hundred and seven. They
go back to the beginning again. I have people that
have gone through my Monday morning meditations over and over
and over and over. Of course, now I tell you, well,
if you listen to my Monday morning meditation and you
don't care for it, you don't like my voice, you
don't like the music, whatever. There are so many just
go to YouTube. There are women, there are men, there
(28:09):
are people from other countries. There's there's a side. There's
so many different types of meditation. It's not just guide
of meditation. There's just music. And they will, they will
they dedicate the first five minutes. Five think about it.
I'm saying that because I know somebody who does this.
Five minutes. They wake up, they grab their phone, okay,
which you shouldn't, but they're not scrolling with it. They
(28:30):
go to their YouTube. They they play something specific they
put it and they just sit there. And while you're
sitting there, of course, for white people who don't know
how to meditate, you might be like, well, what am
I supposed to think of the day? Your blessings, what
you hope to do, not what you can't do, not
(28:51):
your failures that you're going to commit today, the stupid
shit you're gonna do today. You're setting your yourself up.
My god, you're setting yourself up failure. You are your
worst enemy. Not your boss, not your wife or your husband,
your children, the nun in seventh grade. No, it's you.
You are your enemy. You create all this nonsense in
(29:13):
your head. Open your front door, make it a peaceful
place here. I open my front door, and I have
the sky. I mean I have the horizon as far
as I can see. I have the sky many of
you may see. I take pictures every morning. I post
it on my Facebook page because it's just meaningful to me.
And the first thing I do is I say to God,
thank you, thank you, thank you for getting me here
(29:41):
this far. Now, what am I gonna do tomorrow? No,
thank you for getting me to this day. And then
I think in my mind, what would I like to
accomplish by the end of the day, not what I
have to, because you don't do that. You don't tell
God what you're gonna do. You tell God what you're
gonna do. He's gonna laugh in your face. The things
I plan I'm doing today. I'm going to the gym.
(30:04):
I need to clean my gutters out again. If I
don't get to it, it's fine, I have some time.
But I start already planning. I need to get because
I got to get the big ladder, and I got
to go around the house, and I gotta make sure
there's the ground isn't too soft because the ladder gets
all weird. But I start preparing in my mind. But
(30:27):
don't confuse routine with rigidity. Okay, by the end of
the day, this hash to get done, and then all
of a sudden it doesn't get done, and you hate
yourself again. Life is going to throw you curveballs. I
don't know about your God, but my God, he's a
good picture, and he has nailed me in the face
(30:48):
with some curveballs just when I think things are in
or getting the rug pulled out from under me. Every
day every day, because here's the thing I had. I
had a podcast about this called you know, adapting to Me.
I know, it's funny. It's like people like to a
superpower is to fly, as superpower is to to do
(31:11):
you know, to to travel through space and time continue. No,
for me, as superpower is the power of adaptability. Anything
that happens, you go, okay, I can deal with it.
See And many of you are like that, it's not
a power, No, it is. It is because most of
you can't. The minute life throws a curveball at you,
you lose your ship, the minute you lose your job,
(31:33):
the minute you find out you have cancer, or you
have two weeks to die to live, or your your
your loved one is walking away from you, divorcing you.
You've lost the house in a storm. You're you're, you're, you're,
you're the closest person to you died, your pet dies.
(31:54):
I've lost it all, did you? Your heart is still
beating in your chest. That's what I mean by always
thinking worst case scenario. So many bad things have happened
to you and somehow magically you've beaten it. So at
this point in your life, why are you still Why
even worry anymore? You don't have to it should just
(32:16):
be a momentary. Worry happens and you think and you
plant it out. How am I gonna do with this?
Let's talk about thoughts that we carry. That's the real battlefield.
The real battlefield in our world is happening right here.
Worry lives in what might may happen, not what is happening.
(32:42):
The mind loves to predict the future, and anxiety loves
to exaggerate it. You have to learn to challenge those
thoughts when you catch yourself spiraling what if this goes wrong?
What if I feel? What if they leave? What if
blah blah blah, Oh my god, little violin playing stopping?
Counter it with and what if it goes right? What
(33:04):
if from this failure something amazing happens, Because at least
for me, God, it always does. Think of the last time,
for my big warriors, think of the last time you
were doing something, taking a class, doing something during that time,
were you worrying? No? Aha, superpower to those people. I say,
(33:28):
get a hobby. You're spending too much time in your head,
and most of the time you get to the point
that you allow other people to live in your head
rent free. Whenever you're driving listening to music and that moment,
for that one minute, are you worrying? No, So you're
proving to me that you have the power to control
(33:50):
your worries. Again, what if something goes wrong? What if
I fail? What if they leave? Oh my god? What
if I lose my job? Then you lose your job.
This isn't blind optimism. It's balance. It's reminding your brain
(34:12):
that possibilities aren't automatically negative. Mindfulness isn't about becoming a
monk or escaping the world and leaving it all behind
and everything is perfect and now it's about engaging with
more it more consciously. You can be mindful anywhere you
could be doing it. What wash dishes, which I do.
(34:35):
While I'm washing dishes, I count cows, feeding your animals,
seeing how much they care for you because you're feeding them, Driving,
listening to music, looking out the window, looking at the
for me, looking at the farms, looking at the barns,
looking at the cows, looking at the horses. The Amish
says to go by waving walking through my field. I
do this probably every other day. I walk through in
(34:56):
my entire property. It's a big property. It's the act
of being fully present in the moments when I'm walking
my property, I'm not Oh, I got to pay that bill.
I gotta make sure that I do X, Y and Z.
I'm learning about the soil here, which is mostly clay.
Where I am, I'm learning about the different types of bushes.
(35:17):
I'm learning about the different types of grasses. My horse
is usually falling right behind me, nudging me the whole time.
And I'm enjoying the moment. And of course, of course,
in the distance, I'm looking at the clouds over there,
the sun going down over there, the moon over here.
I'm not walking around worry, worry, worry, Oh my god,
this why Jesus Christ, give it, give it a break.
(35:43):
And you ask yourself, stuff, why does this matter? Because
worry can't live in the present, can't It only serves I.
It survives in the what if? What if this happens?
What if that happens. So the more time you spend
in the now, the less room there is for anxiety.
(36:04):
For example, taking a pottery class. While you're taking your
pottery class, are you still worrying? No, You're focusing on
trying to figure out how to hell to do this
thing without making a mess. Instead of saying I'm stressed
out about my job. Try I'm grateful I have work
that challenges me. It's not denial. That's one thing I'm
(36:25):
not saying, live in this weird like no, no, no, I'm
very realistic. It's just changing the directions of your thoughts.
I hate my job, all right, find another one. It's
not that easy. So you continue with negative. It is easy.
I didn't say quit. I said, while you have a
job that you know, you've decided this is not for me.
That's great. There you go. That's step one. Because I
(36:49):
know people that are like, I hate my jobs. Do
you well, I not sure, but it pays well. But
I hate this place. Oh but it's too hot. Okay,
But while you have a job and you're safe and
you have roof over your head and get a paycheck,
take that time. And there's no excuse. You don't have
to go buy a newspaper anymore. You go on your
phone and go on and indeed, you go on zip recruiter.
There's a million places, and you can just start at
(37:10):
lunchtime start looking through jobs. The best time to look
for a job is when you have one, not when
you don't. It's not denial. It's just readdirection. And when
you truly can't find peace, ready, get off your ass
and go outside and breathe. You're not escaping your problems,
(37:34):
you're not running from them. You're just creating a space
between you and them for now. Leave them, leave them
on the on the recliner at home, and then walk
out your door and then go for a brisk walk.
Notice I said brisk walk because the idea of walking
is you want to get your heart up. Okay, Sometimes
the best thing you can do isn't to think harder,
(37:58):
but to stop thinking for a little while, have a
conversation with a good friend, listen to some old music.
We all have those songs that we listen to that
just reconnect that nostalgia that you hear it and you
just forget about the world in front of you and
all you think about is that song. And with that
song comes that moment of where you were at that
(38:18):
time and the people you were with and how special
it was in the laughter and the music and the
dancing and whatever happened. It's a beautiful thing. I just
did it. Worry isn't just emotional, it's I'm sorry. Worry
isn't just mental, it's also emotional. It's that echo of fear,
(38:39):
the weight of the unknown, and the ache of wanting
control in a world that doesn't always play fair. You
know that. But emotions aren't your enemies either. They're just signals.
They're just little flags. They're not even big red flags.
They're just little ones. They tell you what matters, what's important.
(39:00):
When anxiety hits, ask yourself, what is this feeling trying
to tell me? Maybe it's pointing to something you've been avoiding,
a conversation, a decision, a boundary that needs setting. Worry
often hides deeper truths. If you can meet it with
curiosity instead of judgment or running from it in fear,
(39:22):
it can become a teacher. If there's something that worries
you and scares you, and you do this, the next
time it happens, you're gonna do this, and the next
time it happens, you're gonna do this, and stop. Stop.
You're hurting yourself, you're lying to yourself, you're cheating yourself.
Ask yourself, whoa what's going on? When is this little
(39:42):
red flag telling me? What do I need to do different?
Because I'm not doing it again, I'm not running again?
What am I doing differently? What do I need to
do to cope? You must realign your life. You sit
quietly and say what do I need right now? Maybe
a trust, it's honesty, Maybe it's courage, Maybe it's some laughter.
(40:02):
Maybe it's just a good cry or a good scream.
And when you answer truth, answer truthfully, sometimes it's uncomfortable
and you start to calm that innertention. Peace comes from congruence,
when you think, when what you think you feel do
(40:24):
they match? Or do you feel that you're all over
the place. It's just you can't breathe, so you run.
Running is not the answer unless you're running to it.
Here's the truth. Most people miss. Okay, this most this
is such a truth people miss. Peace is not a
(40:45):
personality trait. It's really not. It's a skill. Okay, even
monks had to practice it. They weren't just born super pete.
They're not. It's something you train like a muscle. You
don't become calm overnight. You practice it every time life
throws chaos your way. You start with the small stuff.
(41:08):
When someone cuts you off in traffic, you breathe. When
the line's long at the store, you relax your shoulders.
I laugh at this point in my life, like you
can consider me a monk basically compared to around most
people that I see. I'm in line at Kroger's and
the person in front of me is little daddling or yesterday,
oh no, David Free, I went to Walmart and I
was in the self check and it's funny. Walmart is
(41:31):
now mostly just self checked. There's like three cashiers, which
is sad, and they weren't anybody there but anyway, so
I couldn't go to them. But it's funny, like the
people behind me and the person in front of me
and the person behind me, they're both bohh. You know,
the foot is moving and the move food is moving,
and oh my god, what they're carrying is going from
(41:52):
left to right, from left to right. It's almost like
they're dancing. And I'm being serious, this actually happened, and
I'm looking so now it gets to the point that
the person in front of me feels the vibe and
the energy the stupidity of the person behind me. So
now they look at them and can you believe this, dude,
I can't believe this. I can't believe this. Jesus Christ
blah blah blah blah blah. And I'm just standing in
the middle, like, whether it takes five more minutes or
(42:17):
ten more minutes, it's gonna happen. It is what it is.
It's not like the person up there. Here's me goinghhh,
you sound like a broken engine. You sound like a moron. Honestly,
here's the thing. Nobody is that important. Because let me
tell you something. If something was that important, you wouldn't
(42:37):
be a Walmart. You Like, if it was an emergency,
I'd be in a car and an ambulance going to
where I need it to be, okay, because I have
actually seen people do that. And then all of a sudden,
I'm like, they happen to me in front of me
with the little receipt, And so I watched them and
they go in their car and they sit down and
they diddle that, and they sit in their car and
they're checking radio stage and I'm like, Wow, you're in
(42:58):
a rush to what used to shake you worry. You
shouldn't have the same power as you get older. You
should be able to respond instead of react. That's growth.
Should be able to think first before you act. Stupid
(43:21):
she's like stupid. I always look at them like you're stupid.
To make peace a daily practice. Make peace a daily practice.
Set small checkpoints during the day, morning, noon, and night.
Pause for thirty seconds here and there and ask yourself,
where's my mind right now? If it's racing, bring it back.
(43:42):
If it's tense, breathe, If it's peaceful, enjoy it. This
is how calm becomes your default, not through one big breakthrough,
but through small, repeated acts awareness. Ever drive down the
street and all of a sudden you see something so
beautiful on the distance. If there happens to be a
(44:03):
little spot where you can pull over for ten seconds, okay,
pull over, Just pull over and look at it again,
and just take it in. Let the people drive by
you savor that moment. Don't let it be just a
(44:24):
small part of what you view. Let it be the
entire aspect of what you experience. There will always be
things outside of your control. Weather you're not ever going
to control, so to stop running from it because you
can't other people. There are other people. Time. You can't
(44:45):
control time. Don't try stop fate. Fate you're not going
to control. You can stop life from happening. But you
can stop fighting what you can't change how you perceive it.
You when you release control, hmm, it's a beautiful thing.
(45:10):
You truly do leave it in God's hands, and you
make room for faith, faith that things will unfold as
they're meant to. I know so many people are like, oh,
I leave it in God's hands. I leave it in
God's hands. But they're always worried in stress, like they
are the biggest worriers of everything. And then if you
say something to oh, well, yeah, I leave it in
(45:30):
God's hands. Actually, no, you don't because you're running like
a coward because of something. You obviously don't have faith.
You don't believe in the higher being, and you don't
especially don't believe in yourself. You know, like, don't just
repeat words because it's what sounds good. It is what
it is. Then why are you running? Why are you afraid?
(45:53):
Why are you stressing? Why you worried? Like I said,
to have it after so many years of not just
saying it but actually leaving it. Oh, the world's coming
to an end, Okay, So what I need to do?
When when is the world coming in? Oh? In six days?
All right, So what do I need to do in
six days. I'm not going to sit there and start
screaming the world going to doing end? Why the world's
coming to an end? It's like you're going to die.
(46:18):
We're all going to die. So how are you going
to live? Not how are you going to die? How
are you going to live until you die? You're never
going to live life completely free of worry. You're not.
And again, peace, being peaceful isn't about escaping running from
(46:39):
the storm. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
I love that saying without fear. So today, take a
deep breath, release the weights you've been carrying, and remind
yourself you've made it through every hard day of your
life so far. And that means I guess your score
is pretty good. If you're a team, you're undefeated. One
(47:01):
of the most overlooked aspects of worry is our perspective
of life and how we see it. Anxiety often feels
like a reality, but it's it's not. Worry is a filter,
a lens that magnifies makes what's what we see worse,
what's uncomfortable, what we fear is worse. The trick is
(47:21):
learning to notice the difference between what is and what
your mind is actually creating. Here's a simple exercise that
you can do anytime. Label your thoughts. When you feel
worry rising, Ask yourself, is this a fact or is
this a story that my mind is telling me that
it is probably bullshit, because most of the time it's
(47:44):
It's a story. It's a story that you allow to
keep playing in your head like a film, over and
over and over. That doesn't change. The storm goes by
and again, your story. Here it comes again, fear, storm
comes by, Here it comes again, fear. You are the author,
even when the words feel automatic. Once you start catching
(48:06):
these stories, you can shift them. You can rewrite them,
you can perceive them differently. Instead of thinking I'm going
to fail, say I'm learning and each steps step moves
me forward. Instead of thinking I can't handle this, think
I've handled so many more worse than this, and I'll
(48:28):
handle this too. Your mind believes repetition, so feed it
empowering narratives, over and over and over and over and over.
Another powerful tool is emotional distancing. Imagine watching your worries
from above, as if their clouds floating across the sky,
keep them separate. Out there. You see them, but You
(48:48):
aren't them, You aren't tangled in this drama. You are
the observer. You see it over there. This small mental shift,
observing its instead of reacting it weakens anxiety's grip to you.
It's control on you. Worry. Worry thrives on an action.
(49:11):
When we overthink instead of doing, our anxiety grows. Action.
Even small action is a direct antidote. It doesn't have
to be monumental. It could be sending a single email,
making a phone call, taking a short walk, or tiding
up your house, clean your house clutter. Each steps, each
(49:32):
step proves to your mind I am capable and I
can handle this. Resilience is built in these tiny, consistent acts.
It's just like I said, like training a muscle, your
ability to face uncertainty strengthens over time. You get good
at it. You do the same. You get good at
being a coward, you get good at being strong. You
(49:53):
start to notice something incredible. The things that use to
terrify you become a lot more managed. The waves of
worry just lose their power. You've become so strong and
you begin to navigate life with confidence instead of fear. Mindfulness, mindfulness.
I had that just ran right there. Mindfulness. Let's take
(50:17):
one step further. Gratitude isn't just a polite habit. It's
about rewiring of the mind when worry clouds your thoughts,
Intentionally noticing what's going well changes the chemistry of your brain. Yes, scientifically,
it changes the chemistry of your brain. What's going on
in there? You literally shift your nervous system from fight
(50:40):
or flight to calm. Focus. Start small, Start small. Notice
everything I say is small. It's realistic. Each morning, right
down three things you're grateful for, or just say them
while you're taking a shower or brushing your hair in
the mirror. What I love the mirror better because you
look at yourself. What are three things you're grateful for?
(51:03):
They don't have to be huge. They could be simply
the smell of fresh coffee, the laughter of a loved one,
the sun warming your skin. Over time, the practice creates
a mental environment where worry now fights to take roots,
and it can't because every time re worry happens, you
replace it with things you love, people you love. Reflection
(51:25):
is equally important. End your day by asking what went
well today? I've already said to you that the mind
goes into a deep state of sleep, similar to hypnosis
right before you go to bed. That's why you should
never go to bed angry. You should never go to
bed worried stress. Never go to bed being thankful and
(51:49):
thinking of the amazing things that you can do if
you have to think of the future. What did I
learn today, What did I notice? What did I do
well today? Pat yourself on the back. These reflections create
a feedback loop of growth, reinforcing resilience and reminding you
that you, my friends, are capable of handling life just
(52:11):
as it is, not as your mind predicts it will be.
Everyone's anxiety is unique, and your coping strategies should be too.
Think of it as assembling your own little toolkit of
what works with you. For some people, it's meditation. For
some people, it's for other people, that's walking their dogs.
For some people, that's riding horses. For other people, it's
the gym. For some people, it's running. For some people,
(52:34):
it's swimming, breathing exercises, journaling, music, hiking. For me, it's hiking.
Start by testing different techniques. Pay attention to what truly
calms your mind and what works for you. When worry
strikes you reach in your toolkit instead of your automatic
(52:57):
panic mode. Over time, this's because instinctive reactive, and your
toolkit grows stronger and more reliable. I have people that
used to come to my office and I would burn
incense and they always said this. Actually had a girl
recently just wrote to me from California that like my
office like just to smell the energy of the room.
(53:18):
So that's it. I have people that the minute they
get stressed out, they go in they light a stick
of incense. Now this doesn't mean that you're like, I'm
going to go try it too. It's not working for me. Okay,
it doesn't have to. It might be smelling flowers, it
might be walking your dog, it might be praying, it
might be going to church, walking, hiking, running, whatever. You
can also create your own little mini rituals that you
(53:39):
do intentional pauses throughout your day, even even sixty seconds,
again small amounts. Sixty seconds that's one minute of focused breathing,
remember four four four four, or a short walk outside
that can reset your nervous system. These small acts remind
your brain that calm is very possible even in the
(54:01):
midst of uncertainty. Human beings are wired for connection worry
often isolates us, making us feel alone within our fears.
Reach out to somebody you trust. Notice I said trust
A real friend, a good family member, a mentor, a
therapist can be incredibly powerful in your life. There are
(54:23):
so many people I know that have mentors. It's very important.
If you feel that you're alone, you should have a mentor.
And this not somebod you have to pay by the hour.
Could be like somebody that you can write to every
day with just a simple comment and they write back,
I believe in you or you got this. That's it.
I have quite a few of people that do that.
Simply sharing your thoughts, having someone listen without judgment releases
(54:48):
tension that can be alleviated by willpower. Alone. You don't
have to solve your problems for isolation, collaboration, guidance and
encouragement from others, but it's part of coping. This is
where resilience meets the community around you and where your
mind learns that you are supported, seen and not alone.
(55:11):
So what's to take away today? Jimmy? What did I learn?
What did you teach me? I didn't teach you anything.
I'm just sharing thoughts with you. You can't stop life
from throwing curveballs or pulling the rug out from under you.
And you can't erase worry entirely, nor should you. But
you can't choose how you respond to it. How you
(55:32):
can build habits, rituals, perspectives and tools that allow you
to live fully even with uncertainty. Piece is a skill,
and you are learning it. Anxiety will visit, oh it will,
but it won't take up permanent resonance. Each breath, each
moment of mindfulness, each intentional action, each bit of gratitude,
(55:52):
they are bricks in the foundation of your calm. The
most powerful truth to remember worry doesn't define you, your actions,
your awareness, and your resilience. Do if you can today, tomorrow,
at some point, do it with a friend. Write down
(56:16):
three worries that have been bothering you. Three things? Okay,
write them down. Then you first you ask yourself, can
you act on it right now? Is this something you
can resolve right now? Most of the time it's things
that you can't. You know, there's a bill I have
to pay. Oh my god, Okay, well when is it due?
Well it's not due until you know, the beginning the
(56:37):
middle of next month. Worrying about it now, has nothing
to do with it, you know what. Start worrying about
it the week before or the day before or the
day of, depending on what it is. But if you
can act on it now, then what do you need
to do to deal with it? But again, if not,
(56:58):
place it aside mentally or physically, like in a jar. Boxer,
Get a jar. Write your worries, put on a little
piece of paper, put them in the jar. Another thing,
which I already shared with you is box breathing, which
is very popular. Four counts okay, remember four four four four,
(57:20):
So it's four fours four inhale, so you can inhale
counting to four. Then you hold it for four, then
you exhale it for four, and then you pause for four.
(57:46):
Is that hard? Repeat that four times? I was gonna
say five to ten. No, repeat it four times, make
it easier. Something's gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (57:56):
Oh my god, the world is coming to an end.
Speaker 2 (58:16):
How about mindful moment. Choose one daily activity, washing dishes,
feeding animals, or just walking, and when you're doing it,
no cell phone, fully focus on it. Senses movement and breath.
Notice a difference in mental clarity when you do it
without having a stupid phone in your hand. When I
work on the barn and stuff, I don't have my
(58:36):
phone with me. Melissa gets mad at me because it
tells me my sugar, but I can't have it with me.
I need to disconnect. I want to really be with
my chickens, with my horse. I'm getting another animal soon,
surprise soon. Two. And then the journaling. I have many
(59:01):
people that do journal write those three things. Do it
every day. Three things that are bothering you, three things
that you love. Over time, you notice how things change
in your life when you do that, because you put
it away, you put it on a piece of paper,
and then your support checking This is important to me.
(59:21):
Reach out to one trusted person each week, share your
thoughts or struggles. Don't be afraid to talk to them.
If you do. If there's somebody in your life that
you're afraid to talk to, they're not your friend, they're
not close to you, don't think they are. A friend
is someone that you know that you can call them
at three in the morning and say I don't feel
good and they'll be like, oh, what's up, what happened?
And then you can just talk about it, clarify it,
(59:43):
get it off your chest, and then before you know it,
you're snoring. Share your thoughts or struggles with this person.
Connection reduces the weight of worry and strengthens your resilience. Last,
I want to give you five questions that I've been
working on for a while. I consider them thoughts provoking,
(01:00:05):
because you know, I always say I hope I made
you think. I think these will make you think. When
wor reappears in your life, how often are you reacting
automatically versus responding intentionally? Think about that. So, when something happens,
how quickly do you just react to it or do
(01:00:28):
you find yourself taking a moment and thinking about what
just happened and how you're gonna work through it? Which
do you tend to do? More? Hopefully you stop breathe
and think about it. Should never react reaction. People that react,
Those are the people that are in jail because they reacted.
(01:00:51):
They got pissed because I went to a bar and
some guy just said something to my girl and I
shot him and killed him. So now she's free, he's free,
and I'm in jail for the I know, actually know
a lot of people like that. I know sad, but
I do, and they're still in jail. And this is
stuff that happened when I was in high school. I'm
fifty five. They're still in jail because they reacted instead
(01:01:15):
of thought. Next question, which worries are within your control
and which are not? What are you worried about that
you can control? And what are you worried about that
you can never? And then how can you just let
go of the things that you really can't anyway? Next,
(01:01:39):
what small daily actions can you take to reclaim calm
and peace? What can you do every day to take
back control and bring yourself calm and peace. What are
your routines in your habits currently right now that either
(01:02:04):
give you more stress or bring you more peace? What
are you doing? What are you doing wrong or right? Basically,
so in the beginning when I talked about habits bad habits,
and then I said, hey, guess what, there's good habits
And a lot of people are like, there's good habits. Yes,
there's good habits. They're the same thing. Do you have
more good or bad habits? What stories are you telling
(01:02:29):
yourself about your future? Do you see a positive future?
Do you see hope? Or you're already worried? About the
possibility of something that may happen in the next month.
Why and how can you reframe them to empower you
to figure it out, to prepare for it. If there's
(01:02:51):
something that's going to happen that you're worried about in
a month, but by the time it comes, you should
be ready, right, You're not gonna feel fear again because
even though right now you might turn the TV on
and forget about it, Oh, it's in your subconscious. So
there's this fear. Why is the fear not going away
because you haven't learn to like, what are you gonna do?
Think about that? How are you going to prepare? Because
(01:03:14):
once you prepare for it, the fear leaves. So if
the fear is still there and then it kind of
fades away, and then a month from now it happens
and you're like, oh my god, I'm fear. You're you're
a coward. You didn't prepare. Why would you do that
to yourself? So you don't like yourself. You should have
strengthened yourself, grounded yourself, believed in yourself. Believe in yourself,
(01:03:37):
like I believe in you because I know you can.
You may choose not to, but I don't understand why
why would you want to keep hurting yourself? Remember, your
worst enemy is in here. It's what you're telling yourself
every single day. And I hope I made you think.
(01:03:59):
I hope I made you question your existence, why you're alive,
and how amazing you can be if you choose to
and to appreciate every single tomorrow, every single today, and
to be grateful for all of the experiences of the
past that have made you who you are. Right now,
(01:04:20):
keep this in mind. Choose action over excuse, purpose over comfort,
and the work that matters over the distractions that don't.
Manyame is Jimmy Cazalees and this was your Well now
it's you reset yourself twenty two podcasts, go forward and
(01:04:41):
live your life to the fullest. Thank you so much
for listening, liking, and especially sharing with others. It means
a lot to me. Many blessings to you all. This
is actually episode one, Jesus, this one night, one ninety eight.
It's almost two hundred episodes and many of you, so
many of you, have been listening diligently through all of them,
(01:05:01):
and I appreciate that. I'm truly honored by that. It's
funny last week, Yes, last week I had people that
complained that I was late. Yes, because that for the
beginning of the week was very difficult for me. I
was doing quite a bit of running around and I
wrote everything out and I just couldn't find the time
to do this, and every time I tried, something happened,
(01:05:23):
and something happened. So I ended up not releasing that
podcast until like much later. And the funny thing is
so many people in thank you. So many people wrote
to me like are you okay? People are even calling
me through Facebook like is everything all right? Is there?
You know? And I appreciate that, which basically what it
means to me. People are listening, they're waiting, and they
expect this podcast. That happens with the meditation too. I
(01:05:46):
have people like if it's a little bit later in
the morning or in like a afternoon, people are going,
it's Monday morning, mind's eye, what are you doing it's
the afternoon, what's wrong with you? I'm sorry, I have
farm animals and I have a lot of stuff. I'm
trying to run around. I was actually thinking episode two
hundred to stop and not do it anymore. So I
don't know, I know a lot of made it. Maybe
(01:06:06):
if you're like, you know, no, don't do that, or
because realistically you have quite a bit of topics. I
have no problem continuing, but I have coming in the
next two or three months. I have a lot of
things coming up that are gonna take a lot of
my time, not all of it, but a lot of
my time. And I will always make time for this,
but it's gonna become a little bit more difficult for me.
(01:06:27):
But this is my passion, as you can imagine. But
I was contemplating it. Let me know what you think,
you know. If I don't get any answer, maybe I'll
just end it. And again, you have two hundred episodes
to enjoy to go back and forth from. But if not,
let me know. I appreciate you telling me like, no,
please keep going. Same thing with the meditations. So thank you,
(01:06:48):
thank you, thank you so very much for listening. I
appreciate you, guys, and so does so does Henry. See
have a wonderful week.
Speaker 1 (01:07:20):
The show was brought to you by hypnosis and healing
and the Lies meditation, and to all those again every.
Speaker 2 (01:07:26):
Day as.
Speaker 1 (01:07:41):
If you are interested in learning more about the services
that Jimmy offers, visit www dot n O E M
A h h dot com. Jimmy offers a downloadable e
book and a link to its Mind's Eye meditation sessions,
which are both offered for free. Please consider it a
gift and for those that the do it yourself approach,
(01:08:01):
Jimmy also offers pre recorded self hypnosis sessions. If you
prefer the one on one approach, feel free to reach out.
You have been listening to the Reset Yourself twenty two
podcast
Please note this show contains adult language and themes and
is intended for mature audiences only.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Listener discretion is advised. Jerry Beloved, We're gathering here today
to get through this thing called like You are listening
(00:54):
to the Reset Yourself You Podcast with your host Jimmy Gunzolid.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Okay, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome.
Let me lower this Okay. In this weekly podcast, I
(01:18):
focus on sparking your inner confidence and igniting your belief
in yourself. I am your host of Gonzales, and I
am always extremely very thrilled to share my thoughts and
research with you as we go along on his journey together.
You I him can nurture a mindset that empowers us
to reach our fullest potential. I believe that I write
(01:41):
and record every episode to challenge our thinking and to
encourage us to reflect and inspire action. Were realistic thoughts
towards personal growth, whether you're facing your career transition, seeking
to overcome some challenge, are simply striving for great or
(02:01):
fulfillment in life. This podcast has been your go to
resource for motivation and practical insights for fifty nine countries
that's just I just looked that up. I was like, oh,
pretty cool, thank you. My inspiration to do this show
(02:23):
is to teach people to focus on more of what
they can can accomplish, so they do the things they
need to do when they need to do them, so
they ultimately get to do the things well, get to
receive the things they want when they want them. This
episode is dedicated to every single one of you and
(02:45):
your pets. Tell me what you want and I will
show you how to get it. The question is are
you willing to do the work? Seems to be such
an issue with many today today Today today, we are
tackling a topic that hits every single one of us. Worry.
(03:06):
But I'm not just gonna talk about worry. I'm going
to try to help you through it. That little voice
in the back of your mind whispering sometimes shouting about bills, work, relationships, health,
and especially all of the many what ifs in life
that don't even happen. Let's be honest, worry is a
part of being human. We all do it. We worry about,
(03:28):
like I said, our bills, work, the people we love,
and especially we're so good I mean, we are masters. You.
I know you are. You are a master of worrying
about stuff that you can't even control. And it's actually
not for you to worry about, but you so choose
to a little. Worry keeps us alert. That's fine, it's
(03:51):
our mind's way of saying, hey, pay attention. But when
worry becomes a daily soundtrack in your head and it's
just constantly worry, worry, worry, you wake up worry during
the day, it's filled with worry, and then you go
to bed and that you can't sleep, You toss and turn.
Why worry, and then it starts eating at you, eating
(04:15):
away at your piece, your focus, and even your health.
And that's scientifically proven. Finally, anxiety doesn't knock politely. When
it does, it just barges in uninvited and sits at
the table like it owns the place. Anxiety, depression, the past, anxiety,
the future. How could you be worried so much about
(04:41):
so much in the future. You don't know what's going
to happen in the future, so you're assuming that you're
going to feel You're assuming that you're going to do badly.
You're assuming that you're going to be sick, You're assuming
so you're going to allow yourself to worry, stress out,
and affect your health over something that hasn't even happened.
Instead of focusing on the present. You must learn to
(05:08):
be calm. You must learn to breathe. You must learn
to quiet the noise and take back control of your mind.
Coping isn't about pretending everything's fine. It's about learning how
to breathe through the storm instead of fighting against the
storm or running from the storm. Techniques like meditation, deep breathing, mindfulness,
(05:32):
those aren't just like new age wooy wooie words. Millions
of people and every year it grows, are using them
as anchors to help ground them because they realize the
most important thing in their lives is what their mind.
It's your mind. The more you practice these things, the
(05:56):
stronger your sense of calm becomes, and control over your
mind and the smaller problems actually start to feel. And
I improving that every single day you begin to realize
that most of what you worry about never even happens,
and when it does, they handle it because you've trained
yourself to face life with clarity and composure. This might
(06:19):
feel like something that's so unattainable, but do you all
know the word habit, correct habits. You guys know habits. Yes, okay,
it's creating a new habit. But the thing is, if
you think about it, whenever you think of habits. When
I had my office in Middletown and I had clients,
I would speak to them about I would ask them
(06:40):
specific questions in the beginning always, and one of them
was like, you know, what do you think of habits?
And I never had somebody say comparing the word habits
to good habits. It was always well over eating, over drinking,
over you know, smoking, pornography, spending too much money, gambling.
(07:00):
I'm like, you do realize that there are good habits?
And I would just get the stare. Really yeah, you
can create positive habits, positive habits of no longer being stressed,
positive habits of no longer worrying, positive habits of believing
in yourself, positive habits of waking up in the morning
(07:22):
and meditating, or just take one minute, sixty seconds, sixty
seconds when you wake up, you sit up in bed.
You don't get out of bed, don't put your feet down,
sit up in bed, look around the room and say
thank you, but be aware of it, feel it thank you.
(07:45):
You got up realizing that so many people won't, so
why you So you had the chance to get up,
so you can spend the rest of your day sitting
on your ass, watching mindless television and worrying about things
that may happen. That's a waste. Are you wasting your life?
(08:11):
I'm asking you, are you wasting your life? Right now?
Like even even with my podcast, it's funny, I have
I have a it's a growing group of people that
with my podcast, they will say, like, you made me
think or you made me realize certain aspects that I
(08:33):
never thought about, you know, and and and nothing that
I share it should be things that you're like, oh
my god. It should just be like he's reminding me,
or he's he's reframing a thought that I already knew,
but I just either forgot or I allowed allowed my
life to get lost. So I'm just like you know,
(08:54):
see me as in the type of the light top
of a lighthouse with just a light shining, go hey,
I'm over here. Here's reality. You don't have to live
in fear. You don't have to have bad habits. You
choose these bad habits and then you do them enough
and to become a habit. So you know, just like
with smoking and weight loss, I've had clients through hypnosis
(09:17):
end them immediately one session, couple sessions, and then what
we do is revisit it with positive habits to replace
that time that habit. You begin to realize that most
of what you worry about was a waste of your time.
(09:40):
I mean, I don't know about I don't know, but
I assume I would like to think that your time
is very, very valuable, It's very important. Why would you
want to waste it in fear? Because understand, fear isn't
just like I feel fear and that's that. No fear,
You feel it, and then it affects your body, It
(10:01):
affects your diet, it affects your health in general. Why
do you want to hurt yourself? Because that's what you're
doing when you're fearful, you're hurting yourself. And said you
handle it, you train yourself to face life with clarity
and composure. So the question isn't how do I stop
worrying completely? That's life. It's how do I learn to
(10:23):
live peacefully even when worry comes knocking. That's what we'll
talk about. We all worry. Like I said, I worry.
I mean it would be kind of weird. Worry is important.
Worry is there's danger. Okay, flight, fight, fight or flight,
but not you have a choice. You have worry, you
(10:44):
either fight or flight. You don't sit and just continue
to worry for six hours. That's not the way it works,
because that now it's proven scientifically, scientifically that that hurts you.
I don't care. If you're the calmest person in the world,
you still have things that press on your mind. It's normal.
(11:07):
In fact, worry has a purpose. It's our brain's way
of saying, pay attention, be alert. But like almost everything
in life, there's that tipping point when worry becomes a
constant companion, when it starts showing up at your dinner table,
in your dreams, or worse, as I said, impacting your health.
(11:28):
That's when it becomes just anxiety and anxiety left and
check doesn't go away. It multiplies and it multiplies and
it multiplies, and before you know it, it's stealing your
valuable peace time. So how do we face this? How
do we live in a world full of uncertainty and
(11:49):
still find calm? That's what we're going to talk about.
The first thing to understand is that coping with anxietnxiety
is not about ignoring it. It's not about pretending everything
is fine. In fact, pretending pretending only buries the worry deeper,
(12:12):
and before I know it, it comes back even louder. Coping
is about recognizing your anxiety and acknowledging and then learning
to mannagit. Imagine holding a rope tied to a wild horse.
You don't wrestle with the horse and try to pin
it down. You don't ignore it either. You learn how
to guide it, control it, and eventually ride it with confidence.
(12:38):
That's what coping with worry looks like. A powerful tool
for this mindfulness. Mindfulness is simply the practice of bringing
your awareness to the present moment. Sounds easy, right, Most
of our lives are always in the past or the future,
replaying regrets or forecasting disasters at me may happen. Mindfulness
(13:04):
teaches you to notice when you're spiraling into worry. It
allows you to step back and say, ah, that's just
the thought, but it doesn't have to control me. But
how do you start well? One of the simplest techniques
is breathing. Something that we do constantly, right, I think
(13:27):
you do. I mean I do. But it's not just
like breathing, as I say. It's actually sitting down somewhere
in your office, in the car and the train, go
and work anywhere in your backyard, in standing in the shower.
You don't even have to sit. You just take a
moment inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four,
(13:48):
pauls for four. That's called box breathing. What did he
just say, four four four four? Think about that? So
four you're counting number one two three four, So one
two three four. Now don't say the numbers, just you know,
(14:20):
see four counts in four counts, hold four counts out,
four counts. Pause, Repeat this just a few times, and
the many you feel danger, do that. Your heart automatically slows,
tension melts from your shoulders, and suddenly that worry isn't
(14:43):
that monster that's chasing you down. That monster was chasing
you now five minutes ago, it's no longer there. Another
important tool is perspective, seeing the danger. When anxiety grows,
it inflates problems until they feel completely and totally uncontrollable
(15:05):
and unmanageable. So step back out of your body almost
stand over there. See, the problem is in front of me.
I'm me. You're gonna take you and stand over there,
and you're gonna look at you from the side and
the problem. How likely? You're gonna ask yourself, how likely
is this worry to actually happen? What's the worst case scenario?
(15:34):
Can I actually handle that? You'll often find that the
thing you feared wasn't as big as your mind made
it out to be, and the thing that is real,
you can face it. You've done hard things before, trust me,
and you'll continue to do them again. That's a question
I have for my older listeners, and I'm like, you've
(15:55):
been living fifty sixty, seventy eighty years. By this time,
you should be a monk, because everything that's happening has
happened to you. Nothing is new. None of these fears
that I ask these people are things that are new
to them. They are things that have happened seven, eight, nine,
ten times over the past forty years, and they keep
(16:18):
getting out of it and they keep surviving it. So
when it happens again, by now you should be a
master of it and be like, oh, this is happening.
I'm prepared. There's no time for fear because I already
know what I need to do. I don't run from it,
I don't hide from it. Why do you keep hiding
from it? It doesn't help you, It hurts you. Like
you've ridden this rodeo a few times already, haven't you?
(16:42):
Are you still alive? Have you survived? Did anything happen?
Speaker 1 (16:46):
So?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Why would you continue to keep and saying I don't
know is not an answer. That's ignorance. Ignorance meaning you're
not looking it up, You're not asking true questions. Anxiety, boy,
things that happen happen makes problems feel completely unmanagement. It
(17:07):
really does. Professional help, psychiatrist, a psychologist, therapist, talk therapists,
hit and a therapist is part of coping. Talking with
a clinical psychologist or counselor, or a very good friend,
(17:29):
not an asshole. A good friend isn't a sign of weakness.
It's a sign of strength. It's like bringing in a
coach who can help you train your mind, develop strategies,
and give you tools that aren't always obvious, things like meditation,
structured mindfulness exercises, like the breathing that I you know
(17:51):
four four four four four four four four Box and
practical coping techniques can make a huge difference. Aren't you
worth it? The more you practice them, the easier it
becomes to perceive your challenges as manageable instead of overwhelming.
So instead of having the habit of something's going to
happen and I need to run and hide, you're like, no, oh,
(18:13):
It's time for me to practice my breathing. It's time
for me to make sure that I'm prepared. It's time
for me that I know exactly everything I need to do.
And before you know it, you realize there's nothing to
worry about. It's a waste of your time. A lot
of people get stuck thinking that stopping worry completely is
(18:35):
the goal. Wrong. You can't erase the human experience of concern.
Worry is natural, but you can learn to meet it
with calm, confidence, and clarity. You can create a mental
space where problems exist but they don't control you. They
don't dominate you. You can notice a worry, acknowledge it,
(18:57):
and let it pass like a cloud drifting across the sky.
Here's a practical way to start today. When you notice
yourself beginning to worry, write it down. Cheers, get a
pen and a paper and write it down. Seeing it
on paper helps your brain separate you from that emotion.
This is what's gonna happen, This is how I feel.
(19:20):
Then ask yourself, is this something that I can act
on right now? If yes, make a small plan. If no,
let it go for now. Tell yourself, I will revisit
this later as that worry comes closer for real. So
at least you're not worrying for the next four or
five six hours. You're training your mind to respond to
(19:41):
worry instead of reacting to it. We'll continue to explore
this in a minute.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
But.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
It's actually a tough, tough subject such a simple word worry.
Lifestyle choice, as daily habits and thought patterns all play
a role in managing anxiety. But for now, let's take
a deep breath, acknowledge your worries and remind yourself that
(20:10):
you are capable of handling more than you think, aren't you?
Aren't you capable of handling more than you think? How
old are you? Okay? That number is how many years
you've been alive? I think. I think unless you're like
three years old, you've accomplished quite a few things. You've
(20:32):
gone through a lot of doors. You've dealt with a
lot of assholes. You've had horrible moments, stressful moments, tearful moments,
painful moments, But you're still here. Think about that. Worry
doesn't just appear out of nowhere. That's not true. It
(20:55):
grows in the quiet corners of your day, the moments
when you're tired, oh, thinking, or running on empty. If
anxiety had a favorite food, it would be neglect. I'll
just put that, I'll put it over there and not
deal with it. When we neglect our body, arrest our peace,
that's when worries starts whispering louder and louder and louder.
(21:20):
So the first step in coping is to take care
of the machine you live in your body again. You
don't need to run marathons. You don't need to drink green,
nasty juice every morning with extra vitamins, or join a
gym and lift you know, a million pounds. You don't.
You just need to build consistency. A few minutes of
(21:43):
a few minutes every day of a walk, a stretch,
breathing fresh air can rewire your nervous system. When your
body feels strong, your mind follows suit If your mind
feels hazy, confused, that's probably what you're eating. And then,
(22:06):
of course rest sleep. Lack of rest is like leaving
your mind's front door wide open for worry to walk
in and make itself at home. If you find yourself
lying awake, replying today, replaying today, try this. Write down
your worries right before bed, right when you're going to bed.
I'm worried about this, I'm worried about that right down,
(22:27):
right next to your bed. Empty your head onto the paper.
It's not about fixing them right then. I'm not asking
you to fix them. I'm asking you to just dump them.
And then it's giving your mind permission to rest. You're saying,
I've put this somewhere safe, which I can do with
it tomorrow, and you will. It'll come back tomorrow, but
(22:48):
for the next few hours, hopefully as many as you can.
Now here's the part most people skip, which I mentioned
a little bit. Diet. Your body is a temple. Okay,
your body is a factory. Think of it just a factory.
Think of your body as a machine working all the cogs,
all the wheels. Everything is moving. What you consume, whatever
(23:12):
you eat mentally affects you. It's not just something you
eat and then you poop it out. That's not what's happening.
You have all these things in your body that need
nutrition and it affects you physically. Now here's the twist,
(23:34):
not just actual food, but constant news, social media, doom scrolling,
endless comparison to how everybody else in the world is
obviously doing a lot better than you. It all feeds anxiety.
I mean, if you are one of my wonderful listeners
(23:56):
that find yourself constantly complaining that you're poisoning your body.
If you start your day watching chaos, your brain believes
the world is chaos if you just focus on the
negative aspects of Like I think it's funny people will
say to me, oh, yeah, the world. You know, I
(24:16):
wouldn't want to bring a kid into this world. The
world is getting worse. And you know what's happening in
the it's like the world is ending and this and that.
You know, it's just, oh my god, things are just
it's the end of times. And then you have these stupid,
stupid people every couple of months, Oh the world is
coming to an end. On August thirteenth, Oh the world
is coming to end on January. Stupid people, you know,
(24:41):
it's funny, they say, and they get off on it
because all they're doing is creating fear for people that
are now flipping out. We have enough people dealing with
worry and fear and anxiety, and now let's put fear it,
which is what a lot of happens in social media. Fear.
Let's scare people. Think about it. If you start your
(25:04):
day complaining, and you go to bed complaining, and all
you do is compare how everybody else in the world
is doing better than you, and the world is coming
to an end because of the president or because of
who was president, or the president before him, or the
president before him. If you did some history, you'd realize
(25:28):
that this world has been in a lot worse situations
a lot, and we have survived. We do. That's one
thing about humans. I'll give you credit. We fight. We fight.
Guard your mental space. Read something uplifting, Listen to music
(25:52):
that feeds your spirit or sits in silence before you
invite the world into your mind to help poison it.
Another major player in coping is, like I said, routine.
Worry thrives an uncertainty, A routine gives your brain structure
and sense of predictability. Start small, small, small, a morning
(26:18):
ritual and evening wind down, even a regular time for reflection.
I have listeners that have told me what they do
is the last hour before they go to bed, no phone,
no TV, maybe some soft music in the background or silence.
I personally I love I prefer I like silence. I
like silence when I'm meda take, but I prefer soft
(26:40):
music in the background. In my room, I have a
noise machine that plays a sound of crickets always. Everybody's different.
Soft light in your house, not cold lighting's it affects
you start your morning slowly, cup of tea cup of coffee.
(27:05):
Actually you should always start with a cup of water first.
But you're not one of these people that you get up,
you race for the house because you're running late because
you overslept because you hit the stupid button sixteen times,
and then you're running through the shower, and then you're
getting to work, and chances are you're probably gonna have
a shitty day because that energy that you created. Not
(27:27):
I'm late because of work, No, you're late because you
chose to not wake up a half an hour earlier
to give yourself ten minutes. Notice, whenever I talk, it's
never like an hour, two, No, ten minutes, five minutes.
My Monday morning meditations, I have people there on Monday,
and I have people that it's religious. They will play
(27:47):
because now there's one hundred and yes of yesterday, one
hundred and seven. I think one hundred and seven. They
go back to the beginning again. I have people that
have gone through my Monday morning meditations over and over
and over and over. Of course, now I tell you, well,
if you listen to my Monday morning meditation and you
don't care for it, you don't like my voice, you
don't like the music, whatever. There are so many just
go to YouTube. There are women, there are men, there
(28:09):
are people from other countries. There's there's a side. There's
so many different types of meditation. It's not just guide
of meditation. There's just music. And they will, they will
they dedicate the first five minutes. Five think about it.
I'm saying that because I know somebody who does this.
Five minutes. They wake up, they grab their phone, okay,
which you shouldn't, but they're not scrolling with it. They
(28:30):
go to their YouTube. They they play something specific they
put it and they just sit there. And while you're
sitting there, of course, for white people who don't know
how to meditate, you might be like, well, what am
I supposed to think of the day? Your blessings, what
you hope to do, not what you can't do, not
(28:51):
your failures that you're going to commit today, the stupid
shit you're gonna do today. You're setting your yourself up.
My god, you're setting yourself up failure. You are your
worst enemy. Not your boss, not your wife or your husband,
your children, the nun in seventh grade. No, it's you.
You are your enemy. You create all this nonsense in
(29:13):
your head. Open your front door, make it a peaceful
place here. I open my front door, and I have
the sky. I mean I have the horizon as far
as I can see. I have the sky many of
you may see. I take pictures every morning. I post
it on my Facebook page because it's just meaningful to me.
And the first thing I do is I say to God,
thank you, thank you, thank you for getting me here
(29:41):
this far. Now, what am I gonna do tomorrow? No,
thank you for getting me to this day. And then
I think in my mind, what would I like to
accomplish by the end of the day, not what I
have to, because you don't do that. You don't tell
God what you're gonna do. You tell God what you're
gonna do. He's gonna laugh in your face. The things
I plan I'm doing today. I'm going to the gym.
(30:04):
I need to clean my gutters out again. If I
don't get to it, it's fine, I have some time.
But I start already planning. I need to get because
I got to get the big ladder, and I got
to go around the house, and I gotta make sure
there's the ground isn't too soft because the ladder gets
all weird. But I start preparing in my mind. But
(30:27):
don't confuse routine with rigidity. Okay, by the end of
the day, this hash to get done, and then all
of a sudden it doesn't get done, and you hate
yourself again. Life is going to throw you curveballs. I
don't know about your God, but my God, he's a
good picture, and he has nailed me in the face
(30:48):
with some curveballs just when I think things are in
or getting the rug pulled out from under me. Every
day every day, because here's the thing I had. I
had a podcast about this called you know, adapting to Me.
I know, it's funny. It's like people like to a
superpower is to fly, as superpower is to to do
(31:11):
you know, to to travel through space and time continue. No,
for me, as superpower is the power of adaptability. Anything
that happens, you go, okay, I can deal with it.
See And many of you are like that, it's not
a power, No, it is. It is because most of
you can't. The minute life throws a curveball at you,
you lose your ship, the minute you lose your job,
(31:33):
the minute you find out you have cancer, or you
have two weeks to die to live, or your your
your loved one is walking away from you, divorcing you.
You've lost the house in a storm. You're you're, you're, you're,
you're the closest person to you died, your pet dies.
(31:54):
I've lost it all, did you? Your heart is still
beating in your chest. That's what I mean by always
thinking worst case scenario. So many bad things have happened
to you and somehow magically you've beaten it. So at
this point in your life, why are you still Why
even worry anymore? You don't have to it should just
(32:16):
be a momentary. Worry happens and you think and you
plant it out. How am I gonna do with this?
Let's talk about thoughts that we carry. That's the real battlefield.
The real battlefield in our world is happening right here.
Worry lives in what might may happen, not what is happening.
(32:42):
The mind loves to predict the future, and anxiety loves
to exaggerate it. You have to learn to challenge those
thoughts when you catch yourself spiraling what if this goes wrong?
What if I feel? What if they leave? What if
blah blah blah, Oh my god, little violin playing stopping?
Counter it with and what if it goes right? What
(33:04):
if from this failure something amazing happens, Because at least
for me, God, it always does. Think of the last time,
for my big warriors, think of the last time you
were doing something, taking a class, doing something during that time,
were you worrying? No? Aha, superpower to those people. I say,
(33:28):
get a hobby. You're spending too much time in your head,
and most of the time you get to the point
that you allow other people to live in your head
rent free. Whenever you're driving listening to music and that moment,
for that one minute, are you worrying? No, So you're
proving to me that you have the power to control
(33:50):
your worries. Again, what if something goes wrong? What if
I fail? What if they leave? Oh my god? What
if I lose my job? Then you lose your job.
This isn't blind optimism. It's balance. It's reminding your brain
(34:12):
that possibilities aren't automatically negative. Mindfulness isn't about becoming a
monk or escaping the world and leaving it all behind
and everything is perfect and now it's about engaging with
more it more consciously. You can be mindful anywhere you
could be doing it. What wash dishes, which I do.
(34:35):
While I'm washing dishes, I count cows, feeding your animals,
seeing how much they care for you because you're feeding them, Driving,
listening to music, looking out the window, looking at the
for me, looking at the farms, looking at the barns,
looking at the cows, looking at the horses. The Amish
says to go by waving walking through my field. I
do this probably every other day. I walk through in
(34:56):
my entire property. It's a big property. It's the act
of being fully present in the moments when I'm walking
my property, I'm not Oh, I got to pay that bill.
I gotta make sure that I do X, Y and Z.
I'm learning about the soil here, which is mostly clay.
Where I am, I'm learning about the different types of bushes.
(35:17):
I'm learning about the different types of grasses. My horse
is usually falling right behind me, nudging me the whole time.
And I'm enjoying the moment. And of course, of course,
in the distance, I'm looking at the clouds over there,
the sun going down over there, the moon over here.
I'm not walking around worry, worry, worry, Oh my god,
this why Jesus Christ, give it, give it a break.
(35:43):
And you ask yourself, stuff, why does this matter? Because
worry can't live in the present, can't It only serves I.
It survives in the what if? What if this happens?
What if that happens. So the more time you spend
in the now, the less room there is for anxiety.
(36:04):
For example, taking a pottery class. While you're taking your
pottery class, are you still worrying? No, You're focusing on
trying to figure out how to hell to do this
thing without making a mess. Instead of saying I'm stressed
out about my job. Try I'm grateful I have work
that challenges me. It's not denial. That's one thing I'm
(36:25):
not saying, live in this weird like no, no, no, I'm
very realistic. It's just changing the directions of your thoughts.
I hate my job, all right, find another one. It's
not that easy. So you continue with negative. It is easy.
I didn't say quit. I said, while you have a
job that you know, you've decided this is not for me.
That's great. There you go. That's step one. Because I
(36:49):
know people that are like, I hate my jobs. Do
you well, I not sure, but it pays well. But
I hate this place. Oh but it's too hot. Okay,
But while you have a job and you're safe and
you have roof over your head and get a paycheck,
take that time. And there's no excuse. You don't have
to go buy a newspaper anymore. You go on your
phone and go on and indeed, you go on zip recruiter.
There's a million places, and you can just start at
(37:10):
lunchtime start looking through jobs. The best time to look
for a job is when you have one, not when
you don't. It's not denial. It's just readdirection. And when
you truly can't find peace, ready, get off your ass
and go outside and breathe. You're not escaping your problems,
(37:34):
you're not running from them. You're just creating a space
between you and them for now. Leave them, leave them
on the on the recliner at home, and then walk
out your door and then go for a brisk walk.
Notice I said brisk walk because the idea of walking
is you want to get your heart up. Okay, Sometimes
the best thing you can do isn't to think harder,
(37:58):
but to stop thinking for a little while, have a
conversation with a good friend, listen to some old music.
We all have those songs that we listen to that
just reconnect that nostalgia that you hear it and you
just forget about the world in front of you and
all you think about is that song. And with that
song comes that moment of where you were at that
(38:18):
time and the people you were with and how special
it was in the laughter and the music and the
dancing and whatever happened. It's a beautiful thing. I just
did it. Worry isn't just emotional, it's I'm sorry. Worry
isn't just mental, it's also emotional. It's that echo of fear,
(38:39):
the weight of the unknown, and the ache of wanting
control in a world that doesn't always play fair. You
know that. But emotions aren't your enemies either. They're just signals.
They're just little flags. They're not even big red flags.
They're just little ones. They tell you what matters, what's important.
(39:00):
When anxiety hits, ask yourself, what is this feeling trying
to tell me? Maybe it's pointing to something you've been avoiding,
a conversation, a decision, a boundary that needs setting. Worry
often hides deeper truths. If you can meet it with
curiosity instead of judgment or running from it in fear,
(39:22):
it can become a teacher. If there's something that worries
you and scares you, and you do this, the next
time it happens, you're gonna do this, and the next
time it happens, you're gonna do this, and stop. Stop.
You're hurting yourself, you're lying to yourself, you're cheating yourself.
Ask yourself, whoa what's going on? When is this little
(39:42):
red flag telling me? What do I need to do different?
Because I'm not doing it again, I'm not running again?
What am I doing differently? What do I need to
do to cope? You must realign your life. You sit
quietly and say what do I need right now? Maybe
a trust, it's honesty, Maybe it's courage, Maybe it's some laughter.
(40:02):
Maybe it's just a good cry or a good scream.
And when you answer truth, answer truthfully, sometimes it's uncomfortable
and you start to calm that innertention. Peace comes from congruence,
when you think, when what you think you feel do
(40:24):
they match? Or do you feel that you're all over
the place. It's just you can't breathe, so you run.
Running is not the answer unless you're running to it.
Here's the truth. Most people miss. Okay, this most this
is such a truth people miss. Peace is not a
(40:45):
personality trait. It's really not. It's a skill. Okay, even
monks had to practice it. They weren't just born super pete.
They're not. It's something you train like a muscle. You
don't become calm overnight. You practice it every time life
throws chaos your way. You start with the small stuff.
(41:08):
When someone cuts you off in traffic, you breathe. When
the line's long at the store, you relax your shoulders.
I laugh at this point in my life, like you
can consider me a monk basically compared to around most
people that I see. I'm in line at Kroger's and
the person in front of me is little daddling or yesterday,
oh no, David Free, I went to Walmart and I
was in the self check and it's funny. Walmart is
(41:31):
now mostly just self checked. There's like three cashiers, which
is sad, and they weren't anybody there but anyway, so
I couldn't go to them. But it's funny, like the
people behind me and the person in front of me
and the person behind me, they're both bohh. You know,
the foot is moving and the move food is moving,
and oh my god, what they're carrying is going from
(41:52):
left to right, from left to right. It's almost like
they're dancing. And I'm being serious, this actually happened, and
I'm looking so now it gets to the point that
the person in front of me feels the vibe and
the energy the stupidity of the person behind me. So
now they look at them and can you believe this, dude,
I can't believe this. I can't believe this. Jesus Christ
blah blah blah blah blah. And I'm just standing in
the middle, like, whether it takes five more minutes or
(42:17):
ten more minutes, it's gonna happen. It is what it is.
It's not like the person up there. Here's me goinghhh,
you sound like a broken engine. You sound like a moron. Honestly,
here's the thing. Nobody is that important. Because let me
tell you something. If something was that important, you wouldn't
(42:37):
be a Walmart. You Like, if it was an emergency,
I'd be in a car and an ambulance going to
where I need it to be, okay, because I have
actually seen people do that. And then all of a sudden,
I'm like, they happen to me in front of me
with the little receipt, And so I watched them and
they go in their car and they sit down and
they diddle that, and they sit in their car and
they're checking radio stage and I'm like, Wow, you're in
(42:58):
a rush to what used to shake you worry. You
shouldn't have the same power as you get older. You
should be able to respond instead of react. That's growth.
Should be able to think first before you act. Stupid
(43:21):
she's like stupid. I always look at them like you're stupid.
To make peace a daily practice. Make peace a daily practice.
Set small checkpoints during the day, morning, noon, and night.
Pause for thirty seconds here and there and ask yourself,
where's my mind right now? If it's racing, bring it back.
(43:42):
If it's tense, breathe, If it's peaceful, enjoy it. This
is how calm becomes your default, not through one big breakthrough,
but through small, repeated acts awareness. Ever drive down the
street and all of a sudden you see something so
beautiful on the distance. If there happens to be a
(44:03):
little spot where you can pull over for ten seconds, okay,
pull over, Just pull over and look at it again,
and just take it in. Let the people drive by
you savor that moment. Don't let it be just a
(44:24):
small part of what you view. Let it be the
entire aspect of what you experience. There will always be
things outside of your control. Weather you're not ever going
to control, so to stop running from it because you
can't other people. There are other people. Time. You can't
(44:45):
control time. Don't try stop fate. Fate you're not going
to control. You can stop life from happening. But you
can stop fighting what you can't change how you perceive it.
You when you release control, hmm, it's a beautiful thing.
(45:10):
You truly do leave it in God's hands, and you
make room for faith, faith that things will unfold as
they're meant to. I know so many people are like, oh,
I leave it in God's hands. I leave it in
God's hands. But they're always worried in stress, like they
are the biggest worriers of everything. And then if you
say something to oh, well, yeah, I leave it in
(45:30):
God's hands. Actually, no, you don't because you're running like
a coward because of something. You obviously don't have faith.
You don't believe in the higher being, and you don't
especially don't believe in yourself. You know, like, don't just
repeat words because it's what sounds good. It is what
it is. Then why are you running? Why are you afraid?
(45:53):
Why are you stressing? Why you worried? Like I said,
to have it after so many years of not just
saying it but actually leaving it. Oh, the world's coming
to an end, Okay, So what I need to do?
When when is the world coming in? Oh? In six days?
All right, So what do I need to do in
six days. I'm not going to sit there and start
screaming the world going to doing end? Why the world's
coming to an end? It's like you're going to die.
(46:18):
We're all going to die. So how are you going
to live? Not how are you going to die? How
are you going to live until you die? You're never
going to live life completely free of worry. You're not.
And again, peace, being peaceful isn't about escaping running from
(46:39):
the storm. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
I love that saying without fear. So today, take a
deep breath, release the weights you've been carrying, and remind
yourself you've made it through every hard day of your
life so far. And that means I guess your score
is pretty good. If you're a team, you're undefeated. One
(47:01):
of the most overlooked aspects of worry is our perspective
of life and how we see it. Anxiety often feels
like a reality, but it's it's not. Worry is a filter,
a lens that magnifies makes what's what we see worse,
what's uncomfortable, what we fear is worse. The trick is
(47:21):
learning to notice the difference between what is and what
your mind is actually creating. Here's a simple exercise that
you can do anytime. Label your thoughts. When you feel
worry rising, Ask yourself, is this a fact or is
this a story that my mind is telling me that
it is probably bullshit, because most of the time it's
(47:44):
It's a story. It's a story that you allow to
keep playing in your head like a film, over and
over and over. That doesn't change. The storm goes by
and again, your story. Here it comes again, fear, storm
comes by, Here it comes again, fear. You are the author,
even when the words feel automatic. Once you start catching
(48:06):
these stories, you can shift them. You can rewrite them,
you can perceive them differently. Instead of thinking I'm going
to fail, say I'm learning and each steps step moves
me forward. Instead of thinking I can't handle this, think
I've handled so many more worse than this, and I'll
(48:28):
handle this too. Your mind believes repetition, so feed it
empowering narratives, over and over and over and over and over.
Another powerful tool is emotional distancing. Imagine watching your worries
from above, as if their clouds floating across the sky,
keep them separate. Out there. You see them, but You
(48:48):
aren't them, You aren't tangled in this drama. You are
the observer. You see it over there. This small mental shift,
observing its instead of reacting it weakens anxiety's grip to you.
It's control on you. Worry. Worry thrives on an action.
(49:11):
When we overthink instead of doing, our anxiety grows. Action.
Even small action is a direct antidote. It doesn't have
to be monumental. It could be sending a single email,
making a phone call, taking a short walk, or tiding
up your house, clean your house clutter. Each steps, each
(49:32):
step proves to your mind I am capable and I
can handle this. Resilience is built in these tiny, consistent acts.
It's just like I said, like training a muscle, your
ability to face uncertainty strengthens over time. You get good
at it. You do the same. You get good at
being a coward, you get good at being strong. You
(49:53):
start to notice something incredible. The things that use to
terrify you become a lot more managed. The waves of
worry just lose their power. You've become so strong and
you begin to navigate life with confidence instead of fear. Mindfulness, mindfulness.
I had that just ran right there. Mindfulness. Let's take
(50:17):
one step further. Gratitude isn't just a polite habit. It's
about rewiring of the mind when worry clouds your thoughts,
Intentionally noticing what's going well changes the chemistry of your brain. Yes, scientifically,
it changes the chemistry of your brain. What's going on
in there? You literally shift your nervous system from fight
(50:40):
or flight to calm. Focus. Start small, Start small. Notice
everything I say is small. It's realistic. Each morning, right
down three things you're grateful for, or just say them
while you're taking a shower or brushing your hair in
the mirror. What I love the mirror better because you
look at yourself. What are three things you're grateful for?
(51:03):
They don't have to be huge. They could be simply
the smell of fresh coffee, the laughter of a loved one,
the sun warming your skin. Over time, the practice creates
a mental environment where worry now fights to take roots,
and it can't because every time re worry happens, you
replace it with things you love, people you love. Reflection
(51:25):
is equally important. End your day by asking what went
well today? I've already said to you that the mind
goes into a deep state of sleep, similar to hypnosis
right before you go to bed. That's why you should
never go to bed angry. You should never go to
bed worried stress. Never go to bed being thankful and
(51:49):
thinking of the amazing things that you can do if
you have to think of the future. What did I
learn today, What did I notice? What did I do
well today? Pat yourself on the back. These reflections create
a feedback loop of growth, reinforcing resilience and reminding you
that you, my friends, are capable of handling life just
(52:11):
as it is, not as your mind predicts it will be.
Everyone's anxiety is unique, and your coping strategies should be too.
Think of it as assembling your own little toolkit of
what works with you. For some people, it's meditation. For
some people, it's for other people, that's walking their dogs.
For some people, that's riding horses. For other people, it's
the gym. For some people, it's running. For some people,
(52:34):
it's swimming, breathing exercises, journaling, music, hiking. For me, it's hiking.
Start by testing different techniques. Pay attention to what truly
calms your mind and what works for you. When worry
strikes you reach in your toolkit instead of your automatic
(52:57):
panic mode. Over time, this's because instinctive reactive, and your
toolkit grows stronger and more reliable. I have people that
used to come to my office and I would burn
incense and they always said this. Actually had a girl
recently just wrote to me from California that like my
office like just to smell the energy of the room.
(53:18):
So that's it. I have people that the minute they
get stressed out, they go in they light a stick
of incense. Now this doesn't mean that you're like, I'm
going to go try it too. It's not working for me. Okay,
it doesn't have to. It might be smelling flowers, it
might be walking your dog, it might be praying, it
might be going to church, walking, hiking, running, whatever. You
can also create your own little mini rituals that you
(53:39):
do intentional pauses throughout your day, even even sixty seconds,
again small amounts. Sixty seconds that's one minute of focused breathing,
remember four four four four, or a short walk outside
that can reset your nervous system. These small acts remind
your brain that calm is very possible even in the
(54:01):
midst of uncertainty. Human beings are wired for connection worry
often isolates us, making us feel alone within our fears.
Reach out to somebody you trust. Notice I said trust
A real friend, a good family member, a mentor, a
therapist can be incredibly powerful in your life. There are
(54:23):
so many people I know that have mentors. It's very important.
If you feel that you're alone, you should have a mentor.
And this not somebod you have to pay by the hour.
Could be like somebody that you can write to every
day with just a simple comment and they write back,
I believe in you or you got this. That's it.
I have quite a few of people that do that.
Simply sharing your thoughts, having someone listen without judgment releases
(54:48):
tension that can be alleviated by willpower. Alone. You don't
have to solve your problems for isolation, collaboration, guidance and
encouragement from others, but it's part of coping. This is
where resilience meets the community around you and where your
mind learns that you are supported, seen and not alone.
(55:11):
So what's to take away today? Jimmy? What did I learn?
What did you teach me? I didn't teach you anything.
I'm just sharing thoughts with you. You can't stop life
from throwing curveballs or pulling the rug out from under you.
And you can't erase worry entirely, nor should you. But
you can't choose how you respond to it. How you
(55:32):
can build habits, rituals, perspectives and tools that allow you
to live fully even with uncertainty. Piece is a skill,
and you are learning it. Anxiety will visit, oh it will,
but it won't take up permanent resonance. Each breath, each
moment of mindfulness, each intentional action, each bit of gratitude,
(55:52):
they are bricks in the foundation of your calm. The
most powerful truth to remember worry doesn't define you, your actions,
your awareness, and your resilience. Do if you can today, tomorrow,
at some point, do it with a friend. Write down
(56:16):
three worries that have been bothering you. Three things? Okay,
write them down. Then you first you ask yourself, can
you act on it right now? Is this something you
can resolve right now? Most of the time it's things
that you can't. You know, there's a bill I have
to pay. Oh my god, Okay, well when is it due?
Well it's not due until you know, the beginning the
(56:37):
middle of next month. Worrying about it now, has nothing
to do with it, you know what. Start worrying about
it the week before or the day before or the
day of, depending on what it is. But if you
can act on it now, then what do you need
to do to deal with it? But again, if not,
(56:58):
place it aside mentally or physically, like in a jar. Boxer,
Get a jar. Write your worries, put on a little
piece of paper, put them in the jar. Another thing,
which I already shared with you is box breathing, which
is very popular. Four counts okay, remember four four four four,
(57:20):
So it's four fours four inhale, so you can inhale
counting to four. Then you hold it for four, then
you exhale it for four, and then you pause for four.
(57:46):
Is that hard? Repeat that four times? I was gonna
say five to ten. No, repeat it four times, make
it easier. Something's gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (57:56):
Oh my god, the world is coming to an end.
Speaker 2 (58:16):
How about mindful moment. Choose one daily activity, washing dishes,
feeding animals, or just walking, and when you're doing it,
no cell phone, fully focus on it. Senses movement and breath.
Notice a difference in mental clarity when you do it
without having a stupid phone in your hand. When I
work on the barn and stuff, I don't have my
(58:36):
phone with me. Melissa gets mad at me because it
tells me my sugar, but I can't have it with me.
I need to disconnect. I want to really be with
my chickens, with my horse. I'm getting another animal soon,
surprise soon. Two. And then the journaling. I have many
(59:01):
people that do journal write those three things. Do it
every day. Three things that are bothering you, three things
that you love. Over time, you notice how things change
in your life when you do that, because you put
it away, you put it on a piece of paper,
and then your support checking This is important to me.
(59:21):
Reach out to one trusted person each week, share your
thoughts or struggles. Don't be afraid to talk to them.
If you do. If there's somebody in your life that
you're afraid to talk to, they're not your friend, they're
not close to you, don't think they are. A friend
is someone that you know that you can call them
at three in the morning and say I don't feel
good and they'll be like, oh, what's up, what happened?
And then you can just talk about it, clarify it,
(59:43):
get it off your chest, and then before you know it,
you're snoring. Share your thoughts or struggles with this person.
Connection reduces the weight of worry and strengthens your resilience. Last,
I want to give you five questions that I've been
working on for a while. I consider them thoughts provoking,
(01:00:05):
because you know, I always say I hope I made
you think. I think these will make you think. When
wor reappears in your life, how often are you reacting
automatically versus responding intentionally? Think about that. So, when something happens,
how quickly do you just react to it or do
(01:00:28):
you find yourself taking a moment and thinking about what
just happened and how you're gonna work through it? Which
do you tend to do? More? Hopefully you stop breathe
and think about it. Should never react reaction. People that react,
Those are the people that are in jail because they reacted.
(01:00:51):
They got pissed because I went to a bar and
some guy just said something to my girl and I
shot him and killed him. So now she's free, he's free,
and I'm in jail for the I know, actually know
a lot of people like that. I know sad, but
I do, and they're still in jail. And this is
stuff that happened when I was in high school. I'm
fifty five. They're still in jail because they reacted instead
(01:01:15):
of thought. Next question, which worries are within your control
and which are not? What are you worried about that
you can control? And what are you worried about that
you can never? And then how can you just let
go of the things that you really can't anyway? Next,
(01:01:39):
what small daily actions can you take to reclaim calm
and peace? What can you do every day to take
back control and bring yourself calm and peace. What are
your routines in your habits currently right now that either
(01:02:04):
give you more stress or bring you more peace? What
are you doing? What are you doing wrong or right? Basically,
so in the beginning when I talked about habits bad habits,
and then I said, hey, guess what, there's good habits
And a lot of people are like, there's good habits. Yes,
there's good habits. They're the same thing. Do you have
more good or bad habits? What stories are you telling
(01:02:29):
yourself about your future? Do you see a positive future?
Do you see hope? Or you're already worried? About the
possibility of something that may happen in the next month.
Why and how can you reframe them to empower you
to figure it out, to prepare for it. If there's
(01:02:51):
something that's going to happen that you're worried about in
a month, but by the time it comes, you should
be ready, right, You're not gonna feel fear again because
even though right now you might turn the TV on
and forget about it, Oh, it's in your subconscious. So
there's this fear. Why is the fear not going away
because you haven't learn to like, what are you gonna do?
Think about that? How are you going to prepare? Because
(01:03:14):
once you prepare for it, the fear leaves. So if
the fear is still there and then it kind of
fades away, and then a month from now it happens
and you're like, oh my god, I'm fear. You're you're
a coward. You didn't prepare. Why would you do that
to yourself? So you don't like yourself. You should have
strengthened yourself, grounded yourself, believed in yourself. Believe in yourself,
(01:03:37):
like I believe in you because I know you can.
You may choose not to, but I don't understand why
why would you want to keep hurting yourself? Remember, your
worst enemy is in here. It's what you're telling yourself
every single day. And I hope I made you think.
(01:03:59):
I hope I made you question your existence, why you're alive,
and how amazing you can be if you choose to
and to appreciate every single tomorrow, every single today, and
to be grateful for all of the experiences of the
past that have made you who you are. Right now,
(01:04:20):
keep this in mind. Choose action over excuse, purpose over comfort,
and the work that matters over the distractions that don't.
Manyame is Jimmy Cazalees and this was your Well now
it's you reset yourself twenty two podcasts, go forward and
(01:04:41):
live your life to the fullest. Thank you so much
for listening, liking, and especially sharing with others. It means
a lot to me. Many blessings to you all. This
is actually episode one, Jesus, this one night, one ninety eight.
It's almost two hundred episodes and many of you, so
many of you, have been listening diligently through all of them,
(01:05:01):
and I appreciate that. I'm truly honored by that. It's
funny last week, Yes, last week I had people that
complained that I was late. Yes, because that for the
beginning of the week was very difficult for me. I
was doing quite a bit of running around and I
wrote everything out and I just couldn't find the time
to do this, and every time I tried, something happened,
(01:05:23):
and something happened. So I ended up not releasing that
podcast until like much later. And the funny thing is
so many people in thank you. So many people wrote
to me like are you okay? People are even calling
me through Facebook like is everything all right? Is there?
You know? And I appreciate that, which basically what it
means to me. People are listening, they're waiting, and they
expect this podcast. That happens with the meditation too. I
(01:05:46):
have people like if it's a little bit later in
the morning or in like a afternoon, people are going,
it's Monday morning, mind's eye, what are you doing it's
the afternoon, what's wrong with you? I'm sorry, I have
farm animals and I have a lot of stuff. I'm
trying to run around. I was actually thinking episode two
hundred to stop and not do it anymore. So I
don't know, I know a lot of made it. Maybe
(01:06:06):
if you're like, you know, no, don't do that, or
because realistically you have quite a bit of topics. I
have no problem continuing, but I have coming in the
next two or three months. I have a lot of
things coming up that are gonna take a lot of
my time, not all of it, but a lot of
my time. And I will always make time for this,
but it's gonna become a little bit more difficult for me.
(01:06:27):
But this is my passion, as you can imagine. But
I was contemplating it. Let me know what you think,
you know. If I don't get any answer, maybe I'll
just end it. And again, you have two hundred episodes
to enjoy to go back and forth from. But if not,
let me know. I appreciate you telling me like, no,
please keep going. Same thing with the meditations. So thank you,
(01:06:48):
thank you, thank you so very much for listening. I
appreciate you, guys, and so does so does Henry. See
have a wonderful week.
Speaker 1 (01:07:20):
The show was brought to you by hypnosis and healing
and the Lies meditation, and to all those again every.
Speaker 2 (01:07:26):
Day as.
Speaker 1 (01:07:41):
If you are interested in learning more about the services
that Jimmy offers, visit www dot n O E M
A h h dot com. Jimmy offers a downloadable e
book and a link to its Mind's Eye meditation sessions,
which are both offered for free. Please consider it a
gift and for those that the do it yourself approach,
(01:08:01):
Jimmy also offers pre recorded self hypnosis sessions. If you
prefer the one on one approach, feel free to reach out.
You have been listening to the Reset Yourself twenty two
podcast
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