Harmony in Heartache: Nancy Reeves' Journey of Healing Through Faith and Music

When the ground beneath you crumbles and your world is riddled with loss, where do you find the strength to navigate the uncharted waters of grief? Nancy Reeves, from Brentwood Presbyterian Church, bravely opens up about her personal story of heartache and the resilience of her spirit.  She shares a poignant reflection that tested her faith and how music that helped pave the path to healing.

In an episode that is as touching as it is insightful, Nancy discusses how the unexpected passing of her partner and mother within a short span shook the very foundations of her life. She explains how she found solace in the arts and the steadfast support of her church community. Her story is a profound reminder that amidst the depths of sorrow, there remains a hearth within our souls, a sanctuary where faith and love persist.  Through her testament, we're reminded of the enduring power of faith and the arts in guiding us through the darkest of times.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:08):
Welcome to Resilient Faith, the podcast.
Opportunities to find deeperresilience within ourselves can
come when life seems mostchallenging.
This podcast is to help youdevelop that resilience and
connection with God.
Being resilient and havingpower starts with faith.

Speaker 2 (00:41):
Hello, my name is Nancy Reeves and I have been an
active member of BrentwoodPresbyterian Church for more
than 20 years.
I am currently serving there asthe Director of Worship and
Arts.
I'd like to share with you inthis podcast some of my recent

(01:01):
journey through grief.
This past year brought fourlife-changing events within the
span of six months.
The first two were so positive.
I retired after 32 years ofteaching and then took on the

(01:23):
Worship and Arts Directorposition at the church.
But suddenly I lost my partnerof 22 years to a shocking cancer
diagnosis and not long afterthat lost my mother, just months
after her 90th birthday.
It was a very difficult time.

(01:45):
Suddenly I found a beautifulpoem written by Irish poet, john
O'Donohue, that describes someof what I experienced For grief
by John O'Donohue.
When you lose someone you love,your life becomes strange.

(02:09):
The ground beneath you becomesfragile, your thoughts make your
eyes unsure and some dead echodrags your voice down where
words have no confidence.
Your heart has grown heavy withloss, and though this loss has
wounded others too, no one knowswhat has been taken from you.

(02:33):
When the silence of absencedeepens Flickers of guilt,
kindle regret for all that wasleft unsaid or undone.
There are days when you wake uphappy again, inside the
fullness of life, until themoment breaks and you are thrown

(02:56):
back onto the black tide ofloss.
Days when you have your heartback, you are able to function
well until, in the middle ofwork or encounter suddenly, with
no warning, you are ambushed bygrief.
It becomes hard to trustyourself.

(03:18):
All you can depend on now isthat sorrow will remain faithful
to itself More than you.
It knows its way and will findthe right time to pull and pull
the rope of grief until thatcoiled hill of tears has reduced

(03:39):
to its last drop.
Gradually, you will learnacquaintance with the invisible
form of your departed and whenthe work of grief is done, the
wound of loss will heal and youwill have learned to wean your

(04:00):
eyes from that gap in the airand be able to enter the hearth
in your soul where your lovedone has awaited your return all
the time.

(04:20):
Grief like this was new to me.
I had never before felt thiskind of loss, losing my two
closest confidants just weeksapart.
It has been a struggle,especially when I come home to
an empty house and when I thinkabout calling mom to tell her
what happened in my day, butthere is a blessing in all of

(04:43):
this, even though I still mournand grieve.
The blessings that I havereceived throughout this time
are having God, my church,family and my dear friends
loving me throughout, and havingthe gift of music.
Music has always spoken to meunlike anything else.

(05:06):
It's the way I express myselfwhen words fail me, which they
often do.
I was enthralled by music at anearly age as I listened to my
mother practicing Chopin andRachmaninoff on the piano at
home.
It was the only subject inschool I felt comfortable with

(05:28):
and accomplished in, so I spentmy career teaching it, and now I
have the privilege to plan themusic for the worship services
at BPC.
I get to combine the two thingsthat I am most passionate about
my faith and music.
I felt a bit selfish actuallychoosing songs that are

(05:51):
meaningful to me, that arejoyful to me, and songs that are
helping me get through the painof my loss, but I know that I'm
not the only one going throughthis.
If these songs are speaking tome, then they are speaking to
others.
I almost feel like I'm usingchurch as a big therapy session.

(06:14):
I guess it's true we all do.
We gather together in ourcommunity to hear the good news
of God's promise to sing and topray with and for each other.
It is therapy.
So my work of grief is not done, my wound of loss has not

(06:37):
healed yet, but I do know that,the hearth of my soul, that's
where God resides, even though Imay forget at times and even
though I still grieve.
I leave you now with one of myfavorite hymns.
Thank you for listening.

Speaker 3 (07:01):
I will come to you in the silence.
I will lift you from all yourfear.
You will hear my voice.
I claim you as my choice.
Be still and know I am here.
Do not be afraid, I am with you.

(07:25):
I have called you each by name.
Come and follow me.
I will bring you home.
I love you and you are mine.

Speaker 1 (07:51):
You've been listening to Resilient Faith.
The podcast Resilient Faith issponsored by Brentwood
Presbyterian Church in West LosAngeles.
You can follow our church andthis podcast on Facebook at
BPCTeam and Instagram at BPCunderscore USA.

(08:11):
Make sure to subscribe on yourfavorite podcast platform and
thanks for listening.