May 29, 2025 • 58 mins
What does it truly mean to live with chronic illness? Join us as we explore this profound question with Alyssa Mortel, author of "Invisible Warriors." At 23, Alyssa was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, a condition that nearly broke her spirit but ultimately fueled her journey of resilience and hope. Discover how she transformed her personal struggles into a mission to foster empathy and understanding for those battling invisible illnesses.
On today's episode of "Retreat to Peace," Alyssa shares her heartfelt story and the motivations behind her book, which aims to demystify chronic illness for those who haven't experienced it. We discuss the spoon theory, a powerful metaphor for energy and fatigue, and the challenges Alyssa faced in helping her father understand her condition. Highlighting themes of self-worth and overcoming isolation, Alyssa's journey is a testament to the power of joy and academic pursuit even in the darkest of times.
We also delve into the emotional and psychological toll of chronic illness, especially in the context of COVID-19. Alyssa emphasizes the importance of mental health, the gut-brain connection, and the impact of social media on our well-being. Tune in for an inspiring conversation about breaking the cycle of isolation, embracing compassion, and living authentically despite life's challenges. Don't miss this opportunity to gain a deeper understanding of chronic illness and the strength of the human spirit.
Please visit us at: http://retreattopeace.com to find out more about the shows you love to listen to, the upcoming retreats we have planned and your favorite merchandise to help support those in need. Also, send us your testimonial of how the show or Catherine has helped you. We would love to share your story on the air.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Catherine Daniels (00:15):
Welcome to Retreat to Peace.
My name is Catherine Danielsand I am so excited that you
found us today and that you'respending your time listening to
the show.
The show was founded in 2020,when the world was in a global
pandemic and lockdown, and itbecame abundantly clear to me
(00:36):
that people really needed aresource of being able to
navigate their journey in lifethrough the hardships, with
tools that they may not haveaccess to, and that other people
could help inspire them tonavigate their journey in such a
way that we help them into anarea where they have abundance
(01:00):
and joy and being able to liveauthentically.
And as we started to unravelthis show, it became abundantly
clear that really nothing ispermanent except our souls.
And as we were going country tocountry and creating a bridge
around the world, it was alsovery clear that we really are
(01:24):
one people living in our onehome, which is this planet Earth
.
So as you listen to each of theguests' stories, as they share
their journey with you,understand that it is a process
of prayer that goes into eachinterview for the guidance of
(01:47):
the Holy Spirit and how wenavigate the interview, but also
it's meant to really help eachindividual listening to have the
opportunity to grow from it andbe their best selves.
So, with that said, I inviteyou to get your cup of tea or
coffee, or whatever gives youcomfort and joy, and that soft,
(02:11):
cozy blanket or that safe spacethat you like to sit in and just
settle in as we go through ourinterview today with our
signature talk and for all ofour interviews for Retreat to
Peace.
You can find them athttps://catherinedaniels.
com and I invite you just tosettle in now as we get our
(02:35):
signature talk started today.
This is Catherine Daniels, withRetreat to to peace, and today
I am super excited to introducemy dear friend, Alyssa Mortel hi
.
Alyssa, hi, I am excited tointerview you today.
(02:59):
We are actually on differentparts of the country.
I wish we were closer but we'renot, but we have had the
pleasure of really getting toknow each other at some really
amazing events and it was reallyon my heart to bring Alyssa on
(03:19):
the show and introduce her toall of you around the world,
because she has such anincredible spirit of love and
light and really wants to helpheal so many people, and I think
you're really going to get thatfrom her as we start to talk.
But if you could, alyssa, justgive the audience a little bit
(03:43):
of insight as to who you are.
Alyssa Mortel (03:47):
Well, as you said , my name is Alyssa Mortel and
I'm an author of the bookInvisible Warriors you can look
it up right here and it's allabout chronic illness and trying
to understand more about whatit's like to have chronic
illness.
About what it's like to havechronic illness there's no
medical jargon, which I thinkhas really been getting in the
(04:07):
way of understanding each otherwhen it comes to chronic illness
, and that's what's been on myheart for so long.
I'm a sufferer of chronicillness and I really wrote this
book for my dad when he wastrying to understand what was
going on with me.
When he was trying tounderstand what was going on
(04:28):
with me and I really wanted toexplain it to him and another
one of my good friends whoreally wanted to understand more
about what was happening withme as well.
And I scoured the internet andlibraries and other sources and
I couldn't find anything thatreally made sense.
There was spoon theory.
I don't know if you've everheard of that, but it tries to
explain fatigue using spoons,but it also explains mental
(04:49):
disorders and things like that.
And I caught my dad in theliving room with like four
spoons in his hand, looking athim and he's like okay, if this
is mental, this is a depression,and this is tired fatigue, and
this is this.
And dad, give me the spoons.
You don't understand um.
Catherine Daniels (05:05):
I've not heard of spoon theory, but it
sounds like exactly what you'resaying.
It sounds very complex and verycomplicated and really raw,
like really kind of raw when youthink about it it is.
Alyssa Mortel (05:18):
It's really.
It was hard to understand.
Catherine Daniels (05:21):
I even struggle with it and I've got
the disorder you know we cantalk about that in just a minute
, but I'm so glad that you'rehere because I really want to
have the audience get to learn alittle bit more about your
story with your chronic illnessand for the audience members
(05:43):
that are listening, the bookthat Alyssa referenced is
Invisible Warriors Living Strongwith a Better Understanding of
Chronic Illness, and this book Iwas able to get my hands on and
it's an incredible journey of,like you said, you know, a
(06:05):
testament of your story, butalso helping your dad, helping
your friend.
Alyssa Mortel (06:10):
And.
Catherine Daniels (06:11):
I just wonder if you could bring us back to
the beginning, Alyssa.
So how old were you when youwere diagnosed?
Alyssa Mortel (06:19):
So I was not diagnosed with any of my
illnesses until I was 23, but Istarted experiencing symptoms
much younger I was actually.
I had ear problems all the wayback to when I was about four
months old, and I experienced myfirst fibromyalgia flare when I
(06:40):
was seven.
Catherine Daniels (06:42):
Wow.
Alyssa Mortel (06:43):
But I wasn't diagnosed with fibromyalgia
until I was yeah, like I said 23.
I was actually told at 16 thatthey couldn't see me making it
to 18.
Wow.
Catherine Daniels (06:55):
So I was yeah , I had that feel at 16 years
old being told that.
16 years old being told thatOkay.
Alyssa Mortel (07:03):
Yeah, it was awful.
Actually, I isolated myselfbecause you know, when you're,
when you're 16 years old, youknow your brain isn't quite
developed yet You're goingthrough so many changes.
You're an adolescent, you'redealing with puberty, you're
dealing with social pressure,you're dealing with so many
different things.
And I stopped making friendsbecause I, you know, I was like
(07:31):
what's the point if?
They're going to be at myfuneral three months and it was
a horrible, horrible thing to gothrough.
Catherine Daniels (07:37):
And you're probably thinking too, like if
you were looking back at yourjourney up to 16, back at your
journey up to 16, you were goingthrough, as you said, at seven
you had a flare up.
So you're remembering thoseflare ups, you're remembering
what that felt like and I'm surethere was a part of you that
(07:59):
didn't feel seen or didn't feelheard as a child.
You know, because you weregoing through something that was
different than other childrenwould experience.
Alyssa Mortel (08:11):
Yeah, it was, it was.
It was really hard tounderstand because you know,
when you're a little kid, youwant to run and play and you
want to do all these things thatall the other kids are doing.
Everyone's involved in sports.
I grew up in the mountains inColorado, so everyone's a skier,
snowboarder and you knoweveryone's sledding, everyone's
playing soccer, Everybody'sdoing all these things that you
(08:33):
want to be involved in.
But you're in so much pain youdon't understand and you think
you're crazy.
Or you're told you look fine,because on the outside you do.
And that's another reason why Inamed the book invisible
warriors, because from theoutside it is invisible.
You can't see these illnessesand you're fighting a battle
(08:54):
inside your own body and you'retrying your best to understand
what's happening, but you don't.
And then when I was diagnosed,I was diagnosed with something.
Well, when I was 16, I wasdiagnosed with, you know,
medically unknown symptoms.
So the only thing they couldsee was that I had inflammation
(09:17):
everywhere, but they didn't.
All my other tests were normal.
So they were saying, yes, thereis something medically wrong.
So no, you're not crazy.
So they were saying, yes, thereis something medically wrong,
so no, you're not crazy, but wedon't know what's wrong and how?
Catherine Daniels (09:30):
how did that affect you, like with your
friends, for example?
Because I mean, when you're ateenager, as you stated, it's a
hard thing to go through pubertyand all the changes that are
happening in your body.
But, alyssa, you had all theseother changes that were
happening in your body on top ofthat.
Alyssa Mortel (10:06):
And how did your friends react to that?
I didn't have the best offriends and then again I
isolated myself.
So I really took myself out ofa lot of friend groups and, um,
I was really lucky with myparents because I had really
good parents.
So I um, I was truly blessedthere and I pushed myself
academically and found thingsthat I could strive for, and I
(10:33):
found also that you can makeyour own decisions.
You create your own reality.
So you have to decide whether ornot you want to be miserable
and accept what other people sayor you want to find joy, and
luckily, my dad is a very funnyperson and we as a family, our
(10:59):
kind of motto is we didn't makeit this far to have a bad time,
and so I really took that toheart and luckily, I decided to
choose joy over anything else,and I strive for that.
So I found beauty in every dayand I found beauty in the world
(11:20):
and in dancing.
I really loved ballet and Ireally loved um.
I'm a nerd, so I lovemathematics and I um, I went for
things like that every day andI chose that the diagnosis that
they gave me was not going to bemy story and um, went all in on
(11:41):
things like that went all in onthings like that.
Catherine Daniels (11:48):
I appreciate that so much and I'm just
wondering if you could pull thatlayer back a little bit more
and tell us about what was thatdefining moment that really
allowed you to make thatdecision, that you weren't going
to let this define you, I thinkwhen it comes down to, you have
to look inside yourself and youhave to get kind of a divine
download where you have toreally decide, you know, is this
(12:12):
going to go one way or theother?
Alyssa Mortel (12:14):
Am I going to give up and sit in misery or sit
in and never get out of the bed, or am I going to stand up and
take a step forward?
You know it's when you're a kid, a baby, for example, and
you're struggling to walk, yourparents don't sit there and say,
(12:35):
well, she's just not a walker,I guess she stumbles and you're
not going to make it kid.
No, they encourage you to walk.
You're going to make it, youknow.
I know you fell, you can dothis and one day you do.
You get up and you walk andthen you run, then you learn how
to ride a bike.
But you fall a lot and that'spart of life and that's how I
(13:01):
looked at it.
I'm going to fall, I'm going tostumble, it's going to hurt,
but I know that I can do thiseven though it hurts.
Catherine Daniels (13:12):
So did you shut off a part of your life
because of this?
No, okay, well, that's good.
I mean, if you were to go backto your seven-year-old self,
what would you say to thatlittle seven-year-old self?
What would you say to thatlittle seven-year-old girl you
can do it.
Alyssa Mortel (13:31):
Keep going, keep getting up.
We're going to make it.
It's going to be okay.
I love that You're beautiful.
We got this.
Catherine Daniels (13:41):
I love that.
Yeah, we got this.
I love that.
Yeah, was there a point in timewhere there was, like this
really stark contrast of darkand light that really gave you
that awareness?
Oh, yeah, can you share with usabout?
Alyssa Mortel (13:57):
that yeah, I mean , there's been plenty of times
where, you know, I've criedmyself to sleep or I've been in
the dark places and I've been,you know, 10 feet under and you
know you think you hit rockbottom and it's deeper than that
and you're like, okay, this ismy rock bottom.
And then you go deeper anddeeper down and like, well, I
(14:19):
thought that was my rock bottom,but now I'm 10 feet deeper and
way further down in the mud andI thought that that was my rock
bottom, but now I'm 10 feetdeeper and way further down in
the mud and I thought that thatwas my rock bottom.
You know, and you know I've I'vehad dreams that I've pursued
with every, everything I've had,that an illness got in the way
and I've had to completely giveup.
(14:41):
And you know, I thought thatwas my divine calling or that
was my assignment.
And I've chased with absolutelyeverything in me but again had
to give up because of being sickand having to get a surgery or
having to go this way or thatway, really having to let it go
(15:07):
and release it and that's not aneasy thing to do and being in
pain every single day and havingto choose to take a deep breath
and say okay, I know I'm inpain today, but I'm going to
take a deep breath and goforward anyway, despite the pain
.
You know, and that is adecision, a choice that I
(15:31):
consciously make every singleday, and that that's hard, it's
not easy, it's never easy.
But you know, despite that, youmake those choices.
Catherine Daniels (15:47):
But you know, despite that, you make those
choices.
So what helps you to pivot?
That's my word.
I'm putting on it because whenyou get to a point where you
have to accept that you're notgoing to be able to do something
and you have to go a differentdirection, you're basically
pivoting.
Go a different direction,you're basically pivoting.
What, what helped you withpivoting?
Alyssa Mortel (16:15):
like moving past that dream into a new space.
Um, the biggest thing isunderstanding that there are
false beliefs that I carry, thatwe all carry, and, um, seeing
those false beliefs and then, um, then exposing that that voice
in your head, that negativevoice that you hear, isn't real.
That that is a, that you cancontrol that voice and say you
(16:35):
know, you're really not welcomehere and I have compassion for
myself and I love myself and Ihave self-worth, and that
self-worth and self-confidenceare different things One is real
, one is false and that took mea long time to understand.
Catherine Daniels (16:51):
So I'm going to slow you down here for a
second because I am feeling thatsomebody needs an understanding
, listening to show what thedifference is.
Alyssa Mortel (17:02):
So maybe you can explain that?
Show what the difference is.
So maybe you can explain that,absolutely Understanding that
self-worth is something thatcomes from above and within, and
so self-worth is something thatyou is truly solid, that your
(17:27):
inner knowing and the divineknowing will tell you that
nothing can shake.
It's a foundational thing.
It's true, true love foryourself, the compassion for
yourself, unshakable foundation.
Catherine Daniels (17:44):
And what gave you that, Alyssa?
Alyssa Mortel (17:47):
What gave me that was finally letting go of all
of those false things that I hadbeen told or that others kind
of put into me, and showingmyself true compassion and
(18:07):
showing myself true compassion.
Catherine Daniels (18:09):
So for someone who's listening right
now that may be confined to abed with MS or has some other,
you know, chronic illness andthey're listening to your story
and part of what they're askingthemselves is do I fit in the
qualification bucket of, youknow, self-sabotage with a
(18:33):
limiting belief or something Ibelieve?
So maybe you could share alittle bit about, like what was
something that you werestruggling with that you had to
undo the script to rewrite sothat you would have stronger
self-worth in yourself,absolutely.
Alyssa Mortel (18:53):
So I've been there where I couldn't get out
of bed, um, and I was in so muchpain and I was so sick that I
couldn't move, really, um, andone of the scripts that I would
listen to over and over and overagain in my head was um, you're
(19:14):
not enough.
All your friends have someoneelse.
They're fine without you.
And I would hear this scriptover and over and over again in
my head.
And, you know, even if youweren't around, everyone would
be okay, and it was so loud andso real to me You're a burden.
(19:57):
It was awful and untrue.
I am a blessing, and so are you.
Whoever's listening out there,you are a true blessing to
everyone that you know, and youhave to show yourself compassion
and understand that deep withinyou.
And how you unravel that voiceis understanding who's saying it
, because that's not coming fromwithin you, that's coming from
(20:18):
a false belief, a false voice,and the voice that's saying it
you have to talk back to and howyou do.
That is what I did, personally,was I argued with it and I said
well, am I a burden to myfamily?
(20:38):
No, because they get joy andlove from me.
My family loves me, my friendslove me.
If I wasn't around, they wouldmiss me.
They would know that I you knowhow would they feel if I wasn't
around.
I know they wouldn't miss me.
I know they would mourn me.
I bring a lot of joy to myfriends' lives and I know that
(20:59):
they love me because they comeand they pick me up.
They go out of their way topick me up when I can't drive,
to take me to the movies, totake me to the pool in the hot
springs, or to go on picnics andhikes with them.
Even when I can't walk, they'llpush me around in a wheelchair.
If they didn't like me and Iwas a burden, why would they
(21:20):
take the time to do that?
Right?
So you have to really argue withthat voice, and that voice will
slowly and I mean slowly startto get quieter and more annoying
.
And so, finally, I startedmaking that voice sound annoying
in my head, and now that voicesounds like hey, you, I think
you're just like this little me.
(21:41):
And I'm like shush, you're notwelcome here, you go away,
cancel, bye.
So whenever it shows up now itsounds like this little annoying
little hey, you're not pretty,you're overweight.
And I'm like no, I'm not.
I'm cute, I like my hair, Ilike how sound, I like, I like
(22:07):
things about me.
And I started showing myselfcompassion and I argue with it,
when it used to sound reallyloud and really truthful and my
voice would sound like thatannoying little mosquito.
And now my voice is thepowerful one and it took time
(22:28):
and it took effort and it wasn'teasy and I want your listeners
to hear that it's not easy andit does take time and it takes
practice and it's hard becauseit feels so true, but it's not.
It's not true.
That voice is not real and yourthoughts aren't necessarily
(22:51):
real.
Catherine Daniels (22:52):
Those beliefs .
Alyssa Mortel (22:53):
What's true is that you are worthy.
You are here for a reason.
You are not a burden.
You are not guilty or shamed orshameful.
You are beautiful.
Catherine Daniels (23:07):
Was there someone in your life who used to
say things like that to you?
Oh yeah.
Alyssa Mortel (23:15):
Oh yeah, I had.
I had a few relationships thatwere very, very toxic and people
that put in these things in methat would make me feel so
guilty for just being me and fornot understanding you know.
(23:36):
They would say, well, you knowme well enough that you should
know how I'm thinking and I'mnot a mind reader.
And it took me a long time tounderstand that I wasn't a mind
reader and don't have to be.
Oh, I'm allowed not to be a mindreader.
Yeah, yeah, you're allowed,it's okay to not be a mind
(23:56):
reader.
Nobody is, that's okay, and Istill, to this day, struggle
with it.
Catherine Daniels (24:04):
I mean, you know, I mean it's okay yeah, I
feel a lot of times we adoptthese narratives because, as you
know, as women we're soincredibly strong that we extend
ourselves out and we're alwaysworried about everybody else,
and we're so worried abouteverybody else that we
(24:27):
overextend, and then we take apart of ourselves in the process
.
Alyssa Mortel (24:33):
Absolutely, and we don't want to be a bother.
Right, I don't want to botherthem, I don't want to do this
and I get.
I mean, I'm to this day.
People are like I have friendsor you know people in my life
that say you know, stop thereassurance or the
self-assurance every 10 seconds.
Sometimes I need to self-assuremyself every 10 seconds.
I'm going through one of thosedays.
Catherine Daniels (24:58):
I love what you said about having
self-compassion and justrecognizing that the thoughts
you were having were not servingyou or productive to serving
you in a healthy way.
And my audience you know, asthey're listening to me talk the
(25:20):
way I'm talking because I'vehad surgery on my jaw I can
relate very much with sitting ina space of sometimes we feel
like it's hell, right, but we'rein the valley and we are
sitting in the valley.
(25:41):
We're in the valley and we aresitting in the valley.
And I don't know about you,alyssa, but when I'm sitting in
the valley, my savior is Godevery time, because God's the
one I'm crying out to.
God's the one that's sittingwith me and sees me and knows
what I'm experiencing and goingthrough and going through.
(26:05):
And for me, it's when thosethoughts start to bombard me, as
they try to bombard me.
I'm reminded of how we're partof God.
We have God in us, but thatevil side we do not.
So we have to physically speak.
You know, I rebuke this andit's just.
(26:28):
You know, in these moments Ifeel like that's when we are.
If we're not armored up in thestrength of our God, we, we will
expose ourselves to beingattacked, right?
So I love what you were sayingabout, you know, just having it
(26:51):
in check, knowing that thatvoice felt real and was kind of
drowning you in a moment of time, but slowly you were able to
release and undo.
And all of our experiences,whatever we've experienced in
(27:12):
life some are good, some are badthey're all meant for us to use
as part of our life journey andour life assignment.
So when I sit in those valleysI often remind myself of that,
that I'm sitting in the valleyand God is on the other side of
(27:32):
this mountain working for me.
Incredible, because through themonths that I've been going
through my process, theblessings that have been
(27:56):
bestowed by God's grace, farsurpassed what I would have ever
imagined.
And I think that's part of thetwo.
It's just surrenderingering.
Surrendering to this is anexperience that I'm experiencing
for the greater good.
It's just what do you do withit, how do you use it?
And I'm reminded of one of thefirst interviews that I've ever
(28:17):
done for retreat to peace andhad this beautiful guest that
was a massage therapist, andI'll never forget the story
because it puts it inperspective.
She volunteers at a statehospital and she goes to the
state hospital and the statehospital is one that people
(28:42):
relinquish their family memberstoo, because financially they
can't afford them or, you know,legally whatever it may be, or
maybe they don't have family,but this particular woman was
paralyzed and she couldn't moveand she couldn't talk.
And she couldn't move and shecouldn't talk, she could hear
(29:10):
and she could only see.
That's it.
So if you can imagine every dayof your life, the only thing
you can do is just look out ofthe window of your eyes, and
that's your reality, window ofyour eyes, and that's your
reality.
So the ceiling or theperipheral of what she had
around her, that was her world.
Like.
If you could imagine that.
(29:31):
And I'll never forget thatinterview because my guest
literally broke down crying whenwe were talking about this
particular person and it just,it just reminds me.
I'll never forget it, because itjust reminds me how much we
have to be grateful for you know, how much we have that we can
(29:56):
still do with our lives and thetestimony that we can be for the
next generation or even, youknow, to help people right now
that are suffering.
So it's just, you know, it justreally puts things in
perspective and what I loved so,so much about your Invisible
(30:22):
Warrior book was that you didn'twrite this for you.
You wrote this to help otherpeople that were dealing with
loved ones that have chronicillness, and it just comes from
this beautiful space in yourheart that is unselfishly giving
(30:43):
back because you love your dadso much and so deeply, and even
your best friend.
Like this is what I want to doto help you so that you know how
to help me, and it's just sucha beautiful testament of your
heart and I just love that somuch.
(31:05):
So I'm sure your dad read itcover to cover.
Did he fill out all the funspaces and all the questions you
ask and did he?
Did he have any feedback?
Alyssa Mortel (31:21):
for your book.
You know it was so funny.
He's, um, he's from the older,you know, an older generation,
he's a boomer and he, um, hegets the.
You know, he's very stubbornand he gets in his own way and
he goes.
I'm not gonna fill this out,I'm never gonna, you know,
because it's part workbook toreally help strengthen people's
understanding, and so you know,it's got a lot of the notes and
(31:43):
stuff and so he's I'm nevergoing to fill this out.
And two days later he's sittingthere with a pencil, like he's
got it in his mouth and he'slike and so I walked over to
where he's got his chair in theliving room and oh, it's, it's
like fine print, teeny littlewriting, and he filled out every
single line.
So he really worked on it.
(32:12):
But it was really cute, I haveto go back and you know I was
just hearing what you weresaying about the valley and you
know God is God is who I speakto in the valley too.
And you know it's those timesin the valley that I have found,
especially in my life too,where I find that I end up
digging.
You know I get a shovel and Idig myself deeper sometimes when
I'm in those valleys, takingcontrol of my own life, and I'm
(32:36):
praying to God and I'm askingfor help, but I'm digging my own
hole, saying I can get myselfout.
You know, god help me, but I'mdigging a hole and, um, it is
when I surrender and I say youknow what I'm going to.
I'm going to throw up my shoveldown and let it go and
surrender to God.
And that is when I find thatthose miracles and those things,
(32:59):
um, work out the best.
And it's when we're in thosevalleys and those spaces that
the deepest blessings in ourlives come, because that's what
he's working the hardest in ourlives and really saving those
ways for us.
And it's in those valleys.
It was in the deepest valley ofmy life when this book came to
(33:22):
me, and it is.
I did write it for others andthat is what I'm trying to do
through this book for others,and the reason that I wrote it,
like you said, was for my fathermy best friend and the reason
that I wrote it the way that Idid it took me so long to write
was that you can give it toanybody that I wrote it the way
(33:42):
that I did it took me so long towrite was that you can give it
to anybody.
You know you can really gift itto somebody and say, if you're
the one suffering, you can giveit to anybody and say you know,
this is what I'm going throughand they can really understand.
But on the other side, you cangift it to somebody and say this
is what I think you're goingthrough and they can understand.
So if it was my dad, he couldgive it to me and we could
finally build, you know, thatbridge together.
(34:05):
So it's great for familymembers If you're trying to
connect to each other andfinally understand each other.
I know so many people that aresuffering with chronic illness
and suffering and they justdon't understand each other.
I can't tell you how manyconversations I've had over the
(34:26):
years where people are going, Idon't know, maybe they're just
lazy, maybe they're just.
I just don't understand.
They're so negative all thetime.
I just want to hear somethingpositive from them.
It's so hard to be their friend, or it's so hard to be their
aunt or uncle or whatever theirmother even, or uncle or
(34:46):
whatever their mother even,because they're just so I don't
know, I can't connect.
And this book is that bridge andI've always, you know, I've
heard so many times too, withfatigue, for example.
Well, I'm tired too, I don'twant to go to work, it's, it's
more than that and it's so hardfor people to understand.
(35:09):
It was just like what you weresaying.
Can you imagine just havingthat, just your window, for a
second?
I can live in that space for alittle while.
But it's like when I try toexplain my pain level to people,
you know I live at an eight,that's my baseline.
I don't ever leave that becauseof I've got functional
(35:34):
neurological disorder andfibromyalgia, and so once I hit
that, my pain level never goesdown, it only goes up.
And people are like how do youfunction, how do you even walk
or drive or talk or act Like?
How do you smile?
And it's because I choose to.
(35:55):
What's my other option?
Staying in bed all day Melting.
You have to live your life andit's it's hard to comprehend,
you know.
And so that's why, in my firstchapter of the book and stuff, I
start with mindset, because youhave to get your minds there,
(36:17):
um, because it is such a hardthing for others to comprehend,
especially if you've never beensick.
You know you're going throughso much with your jaw and your
mouth and things like that.
But when you ask people, haveyou ever had a bad toothache?
Yeah, but once you're out ofpain, it's.
(36:45):
So I try to challenge people alittle bit and it's kind of fun.
In my book I ask people whatyou know, which is their
dominant hand, and then I saytake your, your ring finger and
your pinky and tape them downwith like some medical tape.
You know, not hard enough tocut out blood supply, but try to
live your, you know your daylike that.
I know I've challenged you todo this before and it's people
(37:08):
are like, oh, that would be hard.
You know driving, typing.
I had one good friend of mine.
She actually accepted thatchallenge and she went to work
like that and stuff, and shecalled me and she goes.
I made it an hour before I hadto take the tape off.
I couldn't do it.
Catherine Daniels (37:26):
It's funny that we can laugh about her
experience, but your experienceis not the same and you know not
something to laugh about, butit is hard for anyone to
conceptualize what someone elseis feeling.
It's almost like don't know,unless you've walked a mile in
my shoes.
Right, it's one of those, andthere's a couple of things that
(37:50):
I just wanted to go back to thatyou were saying, because the
mindset it's shifting, yourstate it's shifting.
You know where you are andknowing where you are, and I
have to be honest, I have seen,since COVID and lockdown, this
(38:13):
incredible shift in state andmindset and we were talking a
little bit off air before we gotstarted around some of what
we've witnessed, you know aroundthe world, with increased
addiction and suicide and youknow all these other things, but
(38:34):
I'm saying that.
But there's also an increasedmortality in regards to chronic
illness and cancer and thesekinds of things that are really
impacting our human species.
I mean, let's just be, you knowreal about it, and I think it's
(39:00):
more important than ever whichis why I wanted to have you on
this show it's more importantthan ever for people to really
be in awareness of what it isthat you're putting into your
body or what you're listening toor what words you're choosing
to accept or take on and adoptinto your script that's running
(39:24):
through your head.
And you know we hear more andmore about how social media has
created mental illness andreally this isolation, these
things that are happening topeople where they start to
create a stigma againstthemselves because they don't
(39:44):
fit in or what have you.
And I mean we all are uniqueindividuals designed to be
unique.
And what is this fitting in?
Because nobody is identical toanybody else, like.
We're all individuals with ourown thoughts, right.
(40:06):
So there has to be an awarenessof this where we are making a
shift and we're shifting ourstate and we're shifting the
direction that we're leadingourselves into.
And I think some of it comesback to just being self-aware.
Right, being self-aware andthat inner knowing that we
(40:31):
talked about earlier.
It's like knowing that you'rebecoming disconnected and then
looking for new ways to counterthat with connection as your
book how's your readers?
You know, with guidance.
But this just goes like waybeyond the scope of just
(40:54):
somebody with chronic illnessknows connection piece.
I mean, if you're with chronicillness in our lifetime right
now, let's be honest, you don'thave to go anywhere.
You can stay within your fourwalls and order food and watch
(41:14):
Netflix or what have you.
You don't have to go anywhere.
And then you're more isolated,more isolated, more isolated.
Yeah, if you were to go back tosome place in your journey,
that was probably like a darkplace and God's grace comes down
(41:35):
and shed this light on me rightas I say.
How does that shape you?
Because I know for me, whenGod's grace comes in, I'm never
surprised by it, because that'sjust who I am.
But most people I share myexperience, they're like what,
(41:59):
like, are you kidding me?
And I laugh because we all havethat same miraculous experience
of miracles if our eyes are wideopen, right, right.
So for you, like, what wassomething that happened to you
(42:20):
that you least expected?
That people were like what?
Because I think people questionI do.
I think people question I do.
I think people question a lot,especially especially when
there's so much darknesssurrounding them, you know with
what they're listening to or howtheir thoughts are.
Alyssa Mortel (42:38):
So Absolutely Well.
I did not do well in English.
I'll tell you that much rightnow.
I almost pretty much failed itin college.
I'm a math minor, so mebecoming an author was not in
(42:59):
the plan.
So what happened to me is Iactually slipped on some stairs
on my way to work.
I like to think God kind ofpushed me down him, um, and
because I was chasing money, Iwas not chasing my assignment so
the money was rolling down thestairs and you were running
after it apparently, yeah, andGod was going that's not your,
(43:20):
uh, not your calling, sweetheart, you're gonna, you're gonna,
listen to me whether you want to, daughter, and I go, all right,
and, um, I didn't even hit myhead, didn't happen.
But I jostled it enough that Ideveloped this, um, this
functional neurological disorder, and I lost my ability to speak
(43:42):
, I lost my memory.
Um, I have these blackouts thatwould last hours.
It was terrifying and my painlevel went through the roof to
the point where I could barelymake it from my bed to the couch
.
For over a year I went througha functional neurological
disorder clinic and when I gotout of it I wasn't any better,
(44:13):
and so I had to figure out howto get myself well on my own.
So I really discovered my ownsteps to getting better, because
I refused to make that my lifeand I worked really hard to
getting myself well.
And through that journey Iwrote my book and I wrote a
(44:37):
protocol on how to get myselfwell, and for a dark time I was
in isolation and I reallydiscovered how vicious that
cycle can happen so quickly.
Like you said, you can orderfood in, you don't have to go
out, you don't have to talk toanybody and it becomes so
comforting and for a little bityou know, isolating can be
(45:00):
healthy, you know, and it can beokay.
But it becomes comfortable.
And then you get thisdepression, and then you get
this anxiety, and then you getthis voice and then you get this
you're safe here, you'recomfortable here.
It's scary out there and youstart to become fear comes in
(45:22):
and anxiety comes in and it'slike you don't want to go
outside.
You're safe, you're comfortable, you're warm.
People don't understand you,they don't see you like we see.
You Don't go out there and youdon't want to.
And all of a sudden it'sterrifying out there.
You don't want to go out thereand it's awful.
(45:48):
So one of my biggest my knowing, my calling, started to be
ending isolation, which is whatI really want to do worldwide
when it comes to chronic illness, because you do not have to be
alone and you are not alone,even though you feel like it.
Even though you're, you couldhave the weirdest, craziest
(46:09):
sounding chronic illness outthere.
You're not alone.
There's somebody else out therethat's suffering from something
very similar, even if it's notthe exact same thing.
Say, you have arthritis, butonly in your left knee and only
when it rains every Tuesday, oronly on Tuesdays, you know.
(46:30):
But because of social media,it's made it so hard for us to
find each other.
And even if you do find a groupon social media, it's public and
there are people out there,unfortunately, who seem to be
bored or whatever, who troll andadd stigma and say you're lying
or you're ridiculous and you'rethis and you're that, and who
(46:52):
are cruel and anonymous becausethey feel powerful behind a
screen where they don't have anypunishments and because we're
human, we'll hear a hundredpositive things or a million
positive things, but onenegative, and we will focus on
the negative and it's it's awful, and because that's my highest
(47:15):
knowing and that's my highestcalling, I you know, my website
does I am trying to create aground, you know, a grassroots
movement where you can join amembership on my website and
there is a forum for you to goon and create your own page that
says I do get arthritis, butonly on when it rains on Tuesday
(47:36):
and only in my left knee.
And other people can say me too,how do you solve it?
I use this.
That works for me, does it workfor you?
And you can find solace andencouragement and empowerment in
your community with each other,and end that loneliness and
that isolation and say, oneperson is in Tibet and the other
(48:00):
person is in the UK andsomebody else is in Texas, and
because there's that little bitof fee, it's going to hopefully
keep those trolls out and I canuse those funds to get
peer-reviewed papers and goodthings to help support that
community and help it grow.
And that's what I really,really want to do, so that you
(48:22):
don't feel isolated, so thatdoesn't feel so easy anymore,
you can end that loneliness,especially now that we're coming
into these seasons.
Catherine Daniels (48:32):
I love the way that you articulated the
rabbit hole, going down thatrabbit hole, because I think
everybody I'm just, you know,thinking in my own life I think
everybody knows somebody.
Yeah, that is dealing withsomething.
Alyssa Mortel (48:54):
And I think that's why this is so important,
this book is so important, mywebsite is so important is
because, unfortunately, in thisworld that we live in it's true,
especially after COVID there'slong COVID there's all these
other things that are happening.
True, especially after COVIDthere's long COVID there's all
these other things that arehappening.
Brain fog has become a normalthing that we say, where five
years ago nobody knew what thatwas Right, and now it's part of
(49:24):
our vernacular where people aresaying it and they know what
they're talking about, which isterrifying.
And again, you know.
That's why I think medicaljargon and things get in the way
of miscommunication and peopleare again saying well, you
weren't sick yesterday, whycan't you come into work today?
And you're like because I can'tfind my keys, I can't figure
out what's happening in my brain, and it's because of the brain
fog and it's because of fatigue,and people are going oh well,
(49:46):
you're just lazy.
No, I can't get out of bed, Idon't know what's happening to
me, and that's why I wrote thisbook, that's why things are
there, because you need tounderstand what's going on and
you need to be able to have aresource to give to somebody and
say this is what's going on ina way that's accessible and easy
(50:09):
to understand.
Catherine Daniels (50:13):
Alyssa, the ability that you have to come
into the world with so muchenthusiasm to help other people
that are suffering, knowing thatyou yourself are at an eight
all the time I'm using yourwords.
It is hands down, unbelievablyselfless and just beautiful.
(50:41):
And really this is you know whyit was so important for me to
have you, because you just seeyour heart and I see what you're
trying to do and it's sobeautiful.
And people that are not inchronic illness and are at an
eight, they may have otherthings, like you know.
(51:04):
I think about people that sufferfrom post-traumatic stress, for
example, 24 hours a day, sevendays a week.
Their nervous system is firedoff all the time, you know,
constantly aware of whetherthey're safe or not safe, you
(51:25):
know, and it's a similar thingbecause it's like your body's
still firing, it's still firing,still firing.
So it it it's.
Not everybody can understandthe different levels of pain
that people experience, but Ithink everybody can understand
(51:48):
that, a, they've experiencedpain at some level that maybe
they can relate.
B, they know somebody that thiswork you're doing can help.
Or C, maybe it's something thatthey're passionate about too
and want to learn more and helpand do something.
Alyssa Mortel (52:10):
But definitely a chronic, can be considered
chronic illness because it issomething that affects every
single system of the bodyBecause, like you said, you're
firing.
I mean, that's cortisol, that'snorepinephrine, that is dumping
, everything that that isputting your body into fight,
flight freeze.
That affects your gut, thataffects your brain, that affects
(52:30):
everything.
Mental disorders, depression,adhd, anxiety, ptsd, those are
all.
Those are all chronic illnesses, you know, or could be
considered them, because itaffects everything that you do.
You know, my book covers a lotof those mental disorders,
because did you know thatthere's more signals coming from
(52:53):
the gut to the brain than theother way around?
Really, yeah, they're callingit the second brain and those
were just that.
I mean, there's a recentdiscoveries.
Catherine Daniels (53:04):
That's unbelievable.
Alyssa Mortel (53:05):
Right, these are amazing things that we're just
discovering, um, and people needto know these things.
People need to be talking aboutthese things because so many
people suffer.
It's that we're raised in the90s, you know.
We're just discovering thethings that we ate and the way
that we were born.
(53:26):
Even we we're sufferingextremely from that.
I personally was you know thismight be too much information,
but I was a emergency C-sectionand because I wasn't swabbed
properly, I didn't get amicrobiome, so my gut has never
(53:46):
been correct a microbiome, so mygut has never been correct.
So those signals that I shouldbe receiving, I didn't get that.
So I had to discover my properdiet later, later, later in life
.
So the way that I eat reallyaffects my, the way that my day
goes.
That's interesting, really,really important things, and
(54:08):
that is from birth.
Catherine Daniels (54:10):
Yeah, well, you look at even more recently,
with 2020 and the lockdown.
That's trauma, oh, huge Toevery single human being on the
planet.
Yeah, and I say this all thetime where is that trauma gonna
(54:30):
attach in the body?
Because every human has beenthrough something with that
experience, yeah, so where doesit attach?
And then, you know, does itdevelop into something more.
And, like you were saying, youknow the long covid you're
hearing about that more and morewhere people are just suffering
(54:52):
for long, long durations oftime and all the new things that
are coming out with it makes itreally makes you really makes
you want to think about how weare treating each other too.
Right, because now more thanever, there's this narrative
(55:16):
going around that we should allbe against each other, but
everybody that listens to thisplatform knows that part of the
mission is to build a bridgearound the world and unite
people so they're not inisolation, so they're not
feeling alone.
Because you don't have to.
So I think you know yourmessage is just so on point for
(55:41):
everything that I'm doing aswell, and I just can't thank you
enough for being here, and I dohave another question for you,
(56:01):
if I were to pick up your earthangel feather off the ground.
Alyssa Mortel (56:03):
What would your message to the world be?
I think my message to the worldhonestly, is that you're not
alone.
You've never been alone, Evenin the darkest moments of your
heart, where you're in a balland you look like a punching bag
and you're crying and you feelviscerally that you can just
feel alone and your heart isscreaming.
(56:25):
Know that there is someone onthe other side of the world that
is reaching out for you.
That is just someone that justwants to hold your heart and
love you and there is a platformout there for that, and that we
are waiting for you and that Iknow that that voice can be so
(56:45):
loud.
I understand and that we youknow that God and that all of us
understand, because we've allbeen there.
Loneliness and isolation andall of that is a human condition
.
But be compassionate toyourself.
(57:08):
Tell your little person insideof you that you love them and
know that I love you, I'm herefor you and bless you.
Catherine Daniels (57:21):
Alyssa, thank you so so much for being here.
I'm so filled with gratitudeand appreciation.
So so much for being here.
I'm so filled with gratitudeand appreciation.
I just love your heart, I loveyour mission and everything is
yeah.
And for the audience.
If you're wondering where youcan get Alyssa's book, I was
able to get mine on Amazon andit's the Invisible Warriors by
(57:45):
Alyssa Mortel, living Strongwith a better understanding of
chronic illness.
Thank you again, Alyssa.
Thank you so much.
And this is Catherine Daniels,with Retreat to Peace, reminding
you to live your authentic lifein peace and, as always,
retreat to Peace and we'll seeyou next time.
(58:06):
Welcome to Retreat to Peace.
We're excited to have you today.
Welcome to Retreat to Peace.
My name is Catherine Danielsand I am so excited that you
found us today and that you'respending your time listening to
the show.
The show was founded in 2020,when the world was in a global
pandemic and lockdown, and itbecame abundantly clear to me
(00:36):
that people really needed aresource of being able to
navigate their journey in lifethrough the hardships, with
tools that they may not haveaccess to, and that other people
could help inspire them tonavigate their journey in such a
way that we help them into anarea where they have abundance
(01:00):
and joy and being able to liveauthentically.
And as we started to unravelthis show, it became abundantly
clear that really nothing ispermanent except our souls.
And as we were going country tocountry and creating a bridge
around the world, it was alsovery clear that we really are
(01:24):
one people living in our onehome, which is this planet Earth
.
So as you listen to each of theguests' stories, as they share
their journey with you,understand that it is a process
of prayer that goes into eachinterview for the guidance of
(01:47):
the Holy Spirit and how wenavigate the interview, but also
it's meant to really help eachindividual listening to have the
opportunity to grow from it andbe their best selves.
So, with that said, I inviteyou to get your cup of tea or
coffee, or whatever gives youcomfort and joy, and that soft,
(02:11):
cozy blanket or that safe spacethat you like to sit in and just
settle in as we go through ourinterview today with our
signature talk and for all ofour interviews for Retreat to
Peace.
You can find them athttps://catherinedaniels.
com and I invite you just tosettle in now as we get our
(02:35):
signature talk started today.
This is Catherine Daniels, withRetreat to to peace, and today
I am super excited to introducemy dear friend, Alyssa Mortel hi
.
Alyssa, hi, I am excited tointerview you today.
(02:59):
We are actually on differentparts of the country.
I wish we were closer but we'renot, but we have had the
pleasure of really getting toknow each other at some really
amazing events and it was reallyon my heart to bring Alyssa on
(03:19):
the show and introduce her toall of you around the world,
because she has such anincredible spirit of love and
light and really wants to helpheal so many people, and I think
you're really going to get thatfrom her as we start to talk.
But if you could, alyssa, justgive the audience a little bit
(03:43):
of insight as to who you are.
Alyssa Mortel (03:47):
Well, as you said , my name is Alyssa Mortel and
I'm an author of the bookInvisible Warriors you can look
it up right here and it's allabout chronic illness and trying
to understand more about whatit's like to have chronic
illness.
About what it's like to havechronic illness there's no
medical jargon, which I thinkhas really been getting in the
(04:07):
way of understanding each otherwhen it comes to chronic illness
, and that's what's been on myheart for so long.
I'm a sufferer of chronicillness and I really wrote this
book for my dad when he wastrying to understand what was
going on with me.
When he was trying tounderstand what was going on
(04:28):
with me and I really wanted toexplain it to him and another
one of my good friends whoreally wanted to understand more
about what was happening withme as well.
And I scoured the internet andlibraries and other sources and
I couldn't find anything thatreally made sense.
There was spoon theory.
I don't know if you've everheard of that, but it tries to
explain fatigue using spoons,but it also explains mental
(04:49):
disorders and things like that.
And I caught my dad in theliving room with like four
spoons in his hand, looking athim and he's like okay, if this
is mental, this is a depression,and this is tired fatigue, and
this is this.
And dad, give me the spoons.
You don't understand um.
Catherine Daniels (05:05):
I've not heard of spoon theory, but it
sounds like exactly what you'resaying.
It sounds very complex and verycomplicated and really raw,
like really kind of raw when youthink about it it is.
Alyssa Mortel (05:18):
It's really.
It was hard to understand.
Catherine Daniels (05:21):
I even struggle with it and I've got
the disorder you know we cantalk about that in just a minute
, but I'm so glad that you'rehere because I really want to
have the audience get to learn alittle bit more about your
story with your chronic illnessand for the audience members
(05:43):
that are listening, the bookthat Alyssa referenced is
Invisible Warriors Living Strongwith a Better Understanding of
Chronic Illness, and this book Iwas able to get my hands on and
it's an incredible journey of,like you said, you know, a
(06:05):
testament of your story, butalso helping your dad, helping
your friend.
Alyssa Mortel (06:10):
And.
Catherine Daniels (06:11):
I just wonder if you could bring us back to
the beginning, Alyssa.
So how old were you when youwere diagnosed?
Alyssa Mortel (06:19):
So I was not diagnosed with any of my
illnesses until I was 23, but Istarted experiencing symptoms
much younger I was actually.
I had ear problems all the wayback to when I was about four
months old, and I experienced myfirst fibromyalgia flare when I
(06:40):
was seven.
Catherine Daniels (06:42):
Wow.
Alyssa Mortel (06:43):
But I wasn't diagnosed with fibromyalgia
until I was yeah, like I said 23.
I was actually told at 16 thatthey couldn't see me making it
to 18.
Wow.
Catherine Daniels (06:55):
So I was yeah , I had that feel at 16 years
old being told that.
16 years old being told thatOkay.
Alyssa Mortel (07:03):
Yeah, it was awful.
Actually, I isolated myselfbecause you know, when you're,
when you're 16 years old, youknow your brain isn't quite
developed yet You're goingthrough so many changes.
You're an adolescent, you'redealing with puberty, you're
dealing with social pressure,you're dealing with so many
different things.
And I stopped making friendsbecause I, you know, I was like
(07:31):
what's the point if?
They're going to be at myfuneral three months and it was
a horrible, horrible thing to gothrough.
Catherine Daniels (07:37):
And you're probably thinking too, like if
you were looking back at yourjourney up to 16, back at your
journey up to 16, you were goingthrough, as you said, at seven
you had a flare up.
So you're remembering thoseflare ups, you're remembering
what that felt like and I'm surethere was a part of you that
(07:59):
didn't feel seen or didn't feelheard as a child.
You know, because you weregoing through something that was
different than other childrenwould experience.
Alyssa Mortel (08:11):
Yeah, it was, it was.
It was really hard tounderstand because you know,
when you're a little kid, youwant to run and play and you
want to do all these things thatall the other kids are doing.
Everyone's involved in sports.
I grew up in the mountains inColorado, so everyone's a skier,
snowboarder and you knoweveryone's sledding, everyone's
playing soccer, Everybody'sdoing all these things that you
(08:33):
want to be involved in.
But you're in so much pain youdon't understand and you think
you're crazy.
Or you're told you look fine,because on the outside you do.
And that's another reason why Inamed the book invisible
warriors, because from theoutside it is invisible.
You can't see these illnessesand you're fighting a battle
(08:54):
inside your own body and you'retrying your best to understand
what's happening, but you don't.
And then when I was diagnosed,I was diagnosed with something.
Well, when I was 16, I wasdiagnosed with, you know,
medically unknown symptoms.
So the only thing they couldsee was that I had inflammation
(09:17):
everywhere, but they didn't.
All my other tests were normal.
So they were saying, yes, thereis something medically wrong.
So no, you're not crazy.
So they were saying, yes, thereis something medically wrong,
so no, you're not crazy, but wedon't know what's wrong and how?
Catherine Daniels (09:30):
how did that affect you, like with your
friends, for example?
Because I mean, when you're ateenager, as you stated, it's a
hard thing to go through pubertyand all the changes that are
happening in your body.
But, alyssa, you had all theseother changes that were
happening in your body on top ofthat.
Alyssa Mortel (10:06):
And how did your friends react to that?
I didn't have the best offriends and then again I
isolated myself.
So I really took myself out ofa lot of friend groups and, um,
I was really lucky with myparents because I had really
good parents.
So I um, I was truly blessedthere and I pushed myself
academically and found thingsthat I could strive for, and I
(10:33):
found also that you can makeyour own decisions.
You create your own reality.
So you have to decide whether ornot you want to be miserable
and accept what other people sayor you want to find joy, and
luckily, my dad is a very funnyperson and we as a family, our
(10:59):
kind of motto is we didn't makeit this far to have a bad time,
and so I really took that toheart and luckily, I decided to
choose joy over anything else,and I strive for that.
So I found beauty in every dayand I found beauty in the world
(11:20):
and in dancing.
I really loved ballet and Ireally loved um.
I'm a nerd, so I lovemathematics and I um, I went for
things like that every day andI chose that the diagnosis that
they gave me was not going to bemy story and um, went all in on
(11:41):
things like that went all in onthings like that.
Catherine Daniels (11:48):
I appreciate that so much and I'm just
wondering if you could pull thatlayer back a little bit more
and tell us about what was thatdefining moment that really
allowed you to make thatdecision, that you weren't going
to let this define you, I thinkwhen it comes down to, you have
to look inside yourself and youhave to get kind of a divine
download where you have toreally decide, you know, is this
(12:12):
going to go one way or theother?
Alyssa Mortel (12:14):
Am I going to give up and sit in misery or sit
in and never get out of the bed, or am I going to stand up and
take a step forward?
You know it's when you're a kid, a baby, for example, and
you're struggling to walk, yourparents don't sit there and say,
(12:35):
well, she's just not a walker,I guess she stumbles and you're
not going to make it kid.
No, they encourage you to walk.
You're going to make it, youknow.
I know you fell, you can dothis and one day you do.
You get up and you walk andthen you run, then you learn how
to ride a bike.
But you fall a lot and that'spart of life and that's how I
(13:01):
looked at it.
I'm going to fall, I'm going tostumble, it's going to hurt,
but I know that I can do thiseven though it hurts.
Catherine Daniels (13:12):
So did you shut off a part of your life
because of this?
No, okay, well, that's good.
I mean, if you were to go backto your seven-year-old self,
what would you say to thatlittle seven-year-old self?
What would you say to thatlittle seven-year-old girl you
can do it.
Alyssa Mortel (13:31):
Keep going, keep getting up.
We're going to make it.
It's going to be okay.
I love that You're beautiful.
We got this.
Catherine Daniels (13:41):
I love that.
Yeah, we got this.
I love that.
Yeah, was there a point in timewhere there was, like this
really stark contrast of darkand light that really gave you
that awareness?
Oh, yeah, can you share with usabout?
Alyssa Mortel (13:57):
that yeah, I mean , there's been plenty of times
where, you know, I've criedmyself to sleep or I've been in
the dark places and I've been,you know, 10 feet under and you
know you think you hit rockbottom and it's deeper than that
and you're like, okay, this ismy rock bottom.
And then you go deeper anddeeper down and like, well, I
(14:19):
thought that was my rock bottom,but now I'm 10 feet deeper and
way further down in the mud andI thought that that was my rock
bottom, but now I'm 10 feetdeeper and way further down in
the mud and I thought that thatwas my rock bottom.
You know, and you know I've I'vehad dreams that I've pursued
with every, everything I've had,that an illness got in the way
and I've had to completely giveup.
(14:41):
And you know, I thought thatwas my divine calling or that
was my assignment.
And I've chased with absolutelyeverything in me but again had
to give up because of being sickand having to get a surgery or
having to go this way or thatway, really having to let it go
(15:07):
and release it and that's not aneasy thing to do and being in
pain every single day and havingto choose to take a deep breath
and say okay, I know I'm inpain today, but I'm going to
take a deep breath and goforward anyway, despite the pain
.
You know, and that is adecision, a choice that I
(15:31):
consciously make every singleday, and that that's hard, it's
not easy, it's never easy.
But you know, despite that, youmake those choices.
Catherine Daniels (15:47):
But you know, despite that, you make those
choices.
So what helps you to pivot?
That's my word.
I'm putting on it because whenyou get to a point where you
have to accept that you're notgoing to be able to do something
and you have to go a differentdirection, you're basically
pivoting.
Go a different direction,you're basically pivoting.
What, what helped you withpivoting?
Alyssa Mortel (16:15):
like moving past that dream into a new space.
Um, the biggest thing isunderstanding that there are
false beliefs that I carry, thatwe all carry, and, um, seeing
those false beliefs and then, um, then exposing that that voice
in your head, that negativevoice that you hear, isn't real.
That that is a, that you cancontrol that voice and say you
(16:35):
know, you're really not welcomehere and I have compassion for
myself and I love myself and Ihave self-worth, and that
self-worth and self-confidenceare different things One is real
, one is false and that took mea long time to understand.
Catherine Daniels (16:51):
So I'm going to slow you down here for a
second because I am feeling thatsomebody needs an understanding
, listening to show what thedifference is.
Alyssa Mortel (17:02):
So maybe you can explain that?
Show what the difference is.
So maybe you can explain that,absolutely Understanding that
self-worth is something thatcomes from above and within, and
so self-worth is something thatyou is truly solid, that your
(17:27):
inner knowing and the divineknowing will tell you that
nothing can shake.
It's a foundational thing.
It's true, true love foryourself, the compassion for
yourself, unshakable foundation.
Catherine Daniels (17:44):
And what gave you that, Alyssa?
Alyssa Mortel (17:47):
What gave me that was finally letting go of all
of those false things that I hadbeen told or that others kind
of put into me, and showingmyself true compassion and
(18:07):
showing myself true compassion.
Catherine Daniels (18:09):
So for someone who's listening right
now that may be confined to abed with MS or has some other,
you know, chronic illness andthey're listening to your story
and part of what they're askingthemselves is do I fit in the
qualification bucket of, youknow, self-sabotage with a
(18:33):
limiting belief or something Ibelieve?
So maybe you could share alittle bit about, like what was
something that you werestruggling with that you had to
undo the script to rewrite sothat you would have stronger
self-worth in yourself,absolutely.
Alyssa Mortel (18:53):
So I've been there where I couldn't get out
of bed, um, and I was in so muchpain and I was so sick that I
couldn't move, really, um, andone of the scripts that I would
listen to over and over and overagain in my head was um, you're
(19:14):
not enough.
All your friends have someoneelse.
They're fine without you.
And I would hear this scriptover and over and over again in
my head.
And, you know, even if youweren't around, everyone would
be okay, and it was so loud andso real to me You're a burden.
(19:57):
It was awful and untrue.
I am a blessing, and so are you.
Whoever's listening out there,you are a true blessing to
everyone that you know, and youhave to show yourself compassion
and understand that deep withinyou.
And how you unravel that voiceis understanding who's saying it
, because that's not coming fromwithin you, that's coming from
(20:18):
a false belief, a false voice,and the voice that's saying it
you have to talk back to and howyou do.
That is what I did, personally,was I argued with it and I said
well, am I a burden to myfamily?
(20:38):
No, because they get joy andlove from me.
My family loves me, my friendslove me.
If I wasn't around, they wouldmiss me.
They would know that I you knowhow would they feel if I wasn't
around.
I know they wouldn't miss me.
I know they would mourn me.
I bring a lot of joy to myfriends' lives and I know that
(20:59):
they love me because they comeand they pick me up.
They go out of their way topick me up when I can't drive,
to take me to the movies, totake me to the pool in the hot
springs, or to go on picnics andhikes with them.
Even when I can't walk, they'llpush me around in a wheelchair.
If they didn't like me and Iwas a burden, why would they
(21:20):
take the time to do that?
Right?
So you have to really argue withthat voice, and that voice will
slowly and I mean slowly startto get quieter and more annoying
.
And so, finally, I startedmaking that voice sound annoying
in my head, and now that voicesounds like hey, you, I think
you're just like this little me.
(21:41):
And I'm like shush, you're notwelcome here, you go away,
cancel, bye.
So whenever it shows up now itsounds like this little annoying
little hey, you're not pretty,you're overweight.
And I'm like no, I'm not.
I'm cute, I like my hair, Ilike how sound, I like, I like
(22:07):
things about me.
And I started showing myselfcompassion and I argue with it,
when it used to sound reallyloud and really truthful and my
voice would sound like thatannoying little mosquito.
And now my voice is thepowerful one and it took time
(22:28):
and it took effort and it wasn'teasy and I want your listeners
to hear that it's not easy andit does take time and it takes
practice and it's hard becauseit feels so true, but it's not.
It's not true.
That voice is not real and yourthoughts aren't necessarily
(22:51):
real.
Catherine Daniels (22:52):
Those beliefs .
Alyssa Mortel (22:53):
What's true is that you are worthy.
You are here for a reason.
You are not a burden.
You are not guilty or shamed orshameful.
You are beautiful.
Catherine Daniels (23:07):
Was there someone in your life who used to
say things like that to you?
Oh yeah.
Alyssa Mortel (23:15):
Oh yeah, I had.
I had a few relationships thatwere very, very toxic and people
that put in these things in methat would make me feel so
guilty for just being me and fornot understanding you know.
(23:36):
They would say, well, you knowme well enough that you should
know how I'm thinking and I'mnot a mind reader.
And it took me a long time tounderstand that I wasn't a mind
reader and don't have to be.
Oh, I'm allowed not to be a mindreader.
Yeah, yeah, you're allowed,it's okay to not be a mind
(23:56):
reader.
Nobody is, that's okay, and Istill, to this day, struggle
with it.
Catherine Daniels (24:04):
I mean, you know, I mean it's okay yeah, I
feel a lot of times we adoptthese narratives because, as you
know, as women we're soincredibly strong that we extend
ourselves out and we're alwaysworried about everybody else,
and we're so worried abouteverybody else that we
(24:27):
overextend, and then we take apart of ourselves in the process
.
Alyssa Mortel (24:33):
Absolutely, and we don't want to be a bother.
Right, I don't want to botherthem, I don't want to do this
and I get.
I mean, I'm to this day.
People are like I have friendsor you know people in my life
that say you know, stop thereassurance or the
self-assurance every 10 seconds.
Sometimes I need to self-assuremyself every 10 seconds.
I'm going through one of thosedays.
Catherine Daniels (24:58):
I love what you said about having
self-compassion and justrecognizing that the thoughts
you were having were not servingyou or productive to serving
you in a healthy way.
And my audience you know, asthey're listening to me talk the
(25:20):
way I'm talking because I'vehad surgery on my jaw I can
relate very much with sitting ina space of sometimes we feel
like it's hell, right, but we'rein the valley and we are
sitting in the valley.
(25:41):
We're in the valley and we aresitting in the valley.
And I don't know about you,alyssa, but when I'm sitting in
the valley, my savior is Godevery time, because God's the
one I'm crying out to.
God's the one that's sittingwith me and sees me and knows
what I'm experiencing and goingthrough and going through.
(26:05):
And for me, it's when thosethoughts start to bombard me, as
they try to bombard me.
I'm reminded of how we're partof God.
We have God in us, but thatevil side we do not.
So we have to physically speak.
You know, I rebuke this andit's just.
(26:28):
You know, in these moments Ifeel like that's when we are.
If we're not armored up in thestrength of our God, we, we will
expose ourselves to beingattacked, right?
So I love what you were sayingabout, you know, just having it
(26:51):
in check, knowing that thatvoice felt real and was kind of
drowning you in a moment of time, but slowly you were able to
release and undo.
And all of our experiences,whatever we've experienced in
(27:12):
life some are good, some are badthey're all meant for us to use
as part of our life journey andour life assignment.
So when I sit in those valleysI often remind myself of that,
that I'm sitting in the valleyand God is on the other side of
(27:32):
this mountain working for me.
Incredible, because through themonths that I've been going
through my process, theblessings that have been
(27:56):
bestowed by God's grace, farsurpassed what I would have ever
imagined.
And I think that's part of thetwo.
It's just surrenderingering.
Surrendering to this is anexperience that I'm experiencing
for the greater good.
It's just what do you do withit, how do you use it?
And I'm reminded of one of thefirst interviews that I've ever
(28:17):
done for retreat to peace andhad this beautiful guest that
was a massage therapist, andI'll never forget the story
because it puts it inperspective.
She volunteers at a statehospital and she goes to the
state hospital and the statehospital is one that people
(28:42):
relinquish their family memberstoo, because financially they
can't afford them or, you know,legally whatever it may be, or
maybe they don't have family,but this particular woman was
paralyzed and she couldn't moveand she couldn't talk.
And she couldn't move and shecouldn't talk, she could hear
(29:10):
and she could only see.
That's it.
So if you can imagine every dayof your life, the only thing
you can do is just look out ofthe window of your eyes, and
that's your reality, window ofyour eyes, and that's your
reality.
So the ceiling or theperipheral of what she had
around her, that was her world.
Like.
If you could imagine that.
(29:31):
And I'll never forget thatinterview because my guest
literally broke down crying whenwe were talking about this
particular person and it just,it just reminds me.
I'll never forget it, because itjust reminds me how much we
have to be grateful for you know, how much we have that we can
(29:56):
still do with our lives and thetestimony that we can be for the
next generation or even, youknow, to help people right now
that are suffering.
So it's just, you know, it justreally puts things in
perspective and what I loved so,so much about your Invisible
(30:22):
Warrior book was that you didn'twrite this for you.
You wrote this to help otherpeople that were dealing with
loved ones that have chronicillness, and it just comes from
this beautiful space in yourheart that is unselfishly giving
(30:43):
back because you love your dadso much and so deeply, and even
your best friend.
Like this is what I want to doto help you so that you know how
to help me, and it's just sucha beautiful testament of your
heart and I just love that somuch.
(31:05):
So I'm sure your dad read itcover to cover.
Did he fill out all the funspaces and all the questions you
ask and did he?
Did he have any feedback?
Alyssa Mortel (31:21):
for your book.
You know it was so funny.
He's, um, he's from the older,you know, an older generation,
he's a boomer and he, um, hegets the.
You know, he's very stubbornand he gets in his own way and
he goes.
I'm not gonna fill this out,I'm never gonna, you know,
because it's part workbook toreally help strengthen people's
understanding, and so you know,it's got a lot of the notes and
(31:43):
stuff and so he's I'm nevergoing to fill this out.
And two days later he's sittingthere with a pencil, like he's
got it in his mouth and he'slike and so I walked over to
where he's got his chair in theliving room and oh, it's, it's
like fine print, teeny littlewriting, and he filled out every
single line.
So he really worked on it.
(32:12):
But it was really cute, I haveto go back and you know I was
just hearing what you weresaying about the valley and you
know God is God is who I speakto in the valley too.
And you know it's those timesin the valley that I have found,
especially in my life too,where I find that I end up
digging.
You know I get a shovel and Idig myself deeper sometimes when
I'm in those valleys, takingcontrol of my own life, and I'm
(32:36):
praying to God and I'm askingfor help, but I'm digging my own
hole, saying I can get myselfout.
You know, god help me, but I'mdigging a hole and, um, it is
when I surrender and I say youknow what I'm going to.
I'm going to throw up my shoveldown and let it go and
surrender to God.
And that is when I find thatthose miracles and those things,
(32:59):
um, work out the best.
And it's when we're in thosevalleys and those spaces that
the deepest blessings in ourlives come, because that's what
he's working the hardest in ourlives and really saving those
ways for us.
And it's in those valleys.
It was in the deepest valley ofmy life when this book came to
(33:22):
me, and it is.
I did write it for others andthat is what I'm trying to do
through this book for others,and the reason that I wrote it,
like you said, was for my fathermy best friend and the reason
that I wrote it the way that Idid it took me so long to write
was that you can give it toanybody that I wrote it the way
(33:42):
that I did it took me so long towrite was that you can give it
to anybody.
You know you can really gift itto somebody and say, if you're
the one suffering, you can giveit to anybody and say you know,
this is what I'm going throughand they can really understand.
But on the other side, you cangift it to somebody and say this
is what I think you're goingthrough and they can understand.
So if it was my dad, he couldgive it to me and we could
finally build, you know, thatbridge together.
(34:05):
So it's great for familymembers If you're trying to
connect to each other andfinally understand each other.
I know so many people that aresuffering with chronic illness
and suffering and they justdon't understand each other.
I can't tell you how manyconversations I've had over the
(34:26):
years where people are going, Idon't know, maybe they're just
lazy, maybe they're just.
I just don't understand.
They're so negative all thetime.
I just want to hear somethingpositive from them.
It's so hard to be their friend, or it's so hard to be their
aunt or uncle or whatever theirmother even, or uncle or
(34:46):
whatever their mother even,because they're just so I don't
know, I can't connect.
And this book is that bridge andI've always, you know, I've
heard so many times too, withfatigue, for example.
Well, I'm tired too, I don'twant to go to work, it's, it's
more than that and it's so hardfor people to understand.
(35:09):
It was just like what you weresaying.
Can you imagine just havingthat, just your window, for a
second?
I can live in that space for alittle while.
But it's like when I try toexplain my pain level to people,
you know I live at an eight,that's my baseline.
I don't ever leave that becauseof I've got functional
(35:34):
neurological disorder andfibromyalgia, and so once I hit
that, my pain level never goesdown, it only goes up.
And people are like how do youfunction, how do you even walk
or drive or talk or act Like?
How do you smile?
And it's because I choose to.
(35:55):
What's my other option?
Staying in bed all day Melting.
You have to live your life andit's it's hard to comprehend,
you know.
And so that's why, in my firstchapter of the book and stuff, I
start with mindset, because youhave to get your minds there,
(36:17):
um, because it is such a hardthing for others to comprehend,
especially if you've never beensick.
You know you're going throughso much with your jaw and your
mouth and things like that.
But when you ask people, haveyou ever had a bad toothache?
Yeah, but once you're out ofpain, it's.
(36:45):
So I try to challenge people alittle bit and it's kind of fun.
In my book I ask people whatyou know, which is their
dominant hand, and then I saytake your, your ring finger and
your pinky and tape them downwith like some medical tape.
You know, not hard enough tocut out blood supply, but try to
live your, you know your daylike that.
I know I've challenged you todo this before and it's people
(37:08):
are like, oh, that would be hard.
You know driving, typing.
I had one good friend of mine.
She actually accepted thatchallenge and she went to work
like that and stuff, and shecalled me and she goes.
I made it an hour before I hadto take the tape off.
I couldn't do it.
Catherine Daniels (37:26):
It's funny that we can laugh about her
experience, but your experienceis not the same and you know not
something to laugh about, butit is hard for anyone to
conceptualize what someone elseis feeling.
It's almost like don't know,unless you've walked a mile in
my shoes.
Right, it's one of those, andthere's a couple of things that
(37:50):
I just wanted to go back to thatyou were saying, because the
mindset it's shifting, yourstate it's shifting.
You know where you are andknowing where you are, and I
have to be honest, I have seen,since COVID and lockdown, this
(38:13):
incredible shift in state andmindset and we were talking a
little bit off air before we gotstarted around some of what
we've witnessed, you know aroundthe world, with increased
addiction and suicide and youknow all these other things, but
(38:34):
I'm saying that.
But there's also an increasedmortality in regards to chronic
illness and cancer and thesekinds of things that are really
impacting our human species.
I mean, let's just be, you knowreal about it, and I think it's
(39:00):
more important than ever whichis why I wanted to have you on
this show it's more importantthan ever for people to really
be in awareness of what it isthat you're putting into your
body or what you're listening toor what words you're choosing
to accept or take on and adoptinto your script that's running
(39:24):
through your head.
And you know we hear more andmore about how social media has
created mental illness andreally this isolation, these
things that are happening topeople where they start to
create a stigma againstthemselves because they don't
(39:44):
fit in or what have you.
And I mean we all are uniqueindividuals designed to be
unique.
And what is this fitting in?
Because nobody is identical toanybody else, like.
We're all individuals with ourown thoughts, right.
(40:06):
So there has to be an awarenessof this where we are making a
shift and we're shifting ourstate and we're shifting the
direction that we're leadingourselves into.
And I think some of it comesback to just being self-aware.
Right, being self-aware andthat inner knowing that we
(40:31):
talked about earlier.
It's like knowing that you'rebecoming disconnected and then
looking for new ways to counterthat with connection as your
book how's your readers?
You know, with guidance.
But this just goes like waybeyond the scope of just
(40:54):
somebody with chronic illnessknows connection piece.
I mean, if you're with chronicillness in our lifetime right
now, let's be honest, you don'thave to go anywhere.
You can stay within your fourwalls and order food and watch
(41:14):
Netflix or what have you.
You don't have to go anywhere.
And then you're more isolated,more isolated, more isolated.
Yeah, if you were to go back tosome place in your journey,
that was probably like a darkplace and God's grace comes down
(41:35):
and shed this light on me rightas I say.
How does that shape you?
Because I know for me, whenGod's grace comes in, I'm never
surprised by it, because that'sjust who I am.
But most people I share myexperience, they're like what,
(41:59):
like, are you kidding me?
And I laugh because we all havethat same miraculous experience
of miracles if our eyes are wideopen, right, right.
So for you, like, what wassomething that happened to you
(42:20):
that you least expected?
That people were like what?
Because I think people questionI do.
I think people question I do.
I think people question a lot,especially especially when
there's so much darknesssurrounding them, you know with
what they're listening to or howtheir thoughts are.
Alyssa Mortel (42:38):
So Absolutely Well.
I did not do well in English.
I'll tell you that much rightnow.
I almost pretty much failed itin college.
I'm a math minor, so mebecoming an author was not in
(42:59):
the plan.
So what happened to me is Iactually slipped on some stairs
on my way to work.
I like to think God kind ofpushed me down him, um, and
because I was chasing money, Iwas not chasing my assignment so
the money was rolling down thestairs and you were running
after it apparently, yeah, andGod was going that's not your,
(43:20):
uh, not your calling, sweetheart, you're gonna, you're gonna,
listen to me whether you want to, daughter, and I go, all right,
and, um, I didn't even hit myhead, didn't happen.
But I jostled it enough that Ideveloped this, um, this
functional neurological disorder, and I lost my ability to speak
(43:42):
, I lost my memory.
Um, I have these blackouts thatwould last hours.
It was terrifying and my painlevel went through the roof to
the point where I could barelymake it from my bed to the couch
.
For over a year I went througha functional neurological
disorder clinic and when I gotout of it I wasn't any better,
(44:13):
and so I had to figure out howto get myself well on my own.
So I really discovered my ownsteps to getting better, because
I refused to make that my lifeand I worked really hard to
getting myself well.
And through that journey Iwrote my book and I wrote a
(44:37):
protocol on how to get myselfwell, and for a dark time I was
in isolation and I reallydiscovered how vicious that
cycle can happen so quickly.
Like you said, you can orderfood in, you don't have to go
out, you don't have to talk toanybody and it becomes so
comforting and for a little bityou know, isolating can be
(45:00):
healthy, you know, and it can beokay.
But it becomes comfortable.
And then you get thisdepression, and then you get
this anxiety, and then you getthis voice and then you get this
you're safe here, you'recomfortable here.
It's scary out there and youstart to become fear comes in
(45:22):
and anxiety comes in and it'slike you don't want to go
outside.
You're safe, you're comfortable, you're warm.
People don't understand you,they don't see you like we see.
You Don't go out there and youdon't want to.
And all of a sudden it'sterrifying out there.
You don't want to go out thereand it's awful.
(45:48):
So one of my biggest my knowing, my calling, started to be
ending isolation, which is whatI really want to do worldwide
when it comes to chronic illness, because you do not have to be
alone and you are not alone,even though you feel like it.
Even though you're, you couldhave the weirdest, craziest
(46:09):
sounding chronic illness outthere.
You're not alone.
There's somebody else out therethat's suffering from something
very similar, even if it's notthe exact same thing.
Say, you have arthritis, butonly in your left knee and only
when it rains every Tuesday, oronly on Tuesdays, you know.
(46:30):
But because of social media,it's made it so hard for us to
find each other.
And even if you do find a groupon social media, it's public and
there are people out there,unfortunately, who seem to be
bored or whatever, who troll andadd stigma and say you're lying
or you're ridiculous and you'rethis and you're that, and who
(46:52):
are cruel and anonymous becausethey feel powerful behind a
screen where they don't have anypunishments and because we're
human, we'll hear a hundredpositive things or a million
positive things, but onenegative, and we will focus on
the negative and it's it's awful, and because that's my highest
(47:15):
knowing and that's my highestcalling, I you know, my website
does I am trying to create aground, you know, a grassroots
movement where you can join amembership on my website and
there is a forum for you to goon and create your own page that
says I do get arthritis, butonly on when it rains on Tuesday
(47:36):
and only in my left knee.
And other people can say me too,how do you solve it?
I use this.
That works for me, does it workfor you?
And you can find solace andencouragement and empowerment in
your community with each other,and end that loneliness and
that isolation and say, oneperson is in Tibet and the other
(48:00):
person is in the UK andsomebody else is in Texas, and
because there's that little bitof fee, it's going to hopefully
keep those trolls out and I canuse those funds to get
peer-reviewed papers and goodthings to help support that
community and help it grow.
And that's what I really,really want to do, so that you
(48:22):
don't feel isolated, so thatdoesn't feel so easy anymore,
you can end that loneliness,especially now that we're coming
into these seasons.
Catherine Daniels (48:32):
I love the way that you articulated the
rabbit hole, going down thatrabbit hole, because I think
everybody I'm just, you know,thinking in my own life I think
everybody knows somebody.
Yeah, that is dealing withsomething.
Alyssa Mortel (48:54):
And I think that's why this is so important,
this book is so important, mywebsite is so important is
because, unfortunately, in thisworld that we live in it's true,
especially after COVID there'slong COVID there's all these
other things that are happening.
True, especially after COVIDthere's long COVID there's all
these other things that arehappening.
Brain fog has become a normalthing that we say, where five
years ago nobody knew what thatwas Right, and now it's part of
(49:24):
our vernacular where people aresaying it and they know what
they're talking about, which isterrifying.
And again, you know.
That's why I think medicaljargon and things get in the way
of miscommunication and peopleare again saying well, you
weren't sick yesterday, whycan't you come into work today?
And you're like because I can'tfind my keys, I can't figure
out what's happening in my brain, and it's because of the brain
fog and it's because of fatigue,and people are going oh well,
(49:46):
you're just lazy.
No, I can't get out of bed, Idon't know what's happening to
me, and that's why I wrote thisbook, that's why things are
there, because you need tounderstand what's going on and
you need to be able to have aresource to give to somebody and
say this is what's going on ina way that's accessible and easy
(50:09):
to understand.
Catherine Daniels (50:13):
Alyssa, the ability that you have to come
into the world with so muchenthusiasm to help other people
that are suffering, knowing thatyou yourself are at an eight
all the time I'm using yourwords.
It is hands down, unbelievablyselfless and just beautiful.
(50:41):
And really this is you know whyit was so important for me to
have you, because you just seeyour heart and I see what you're
trying to do and it's sobeautiful.
And people that are not inchronic illness and are at an
eight, they may have otherthings, like you know.
(51:04):
I think about people that sufferfrom post-traumatic stress, for
example, 24 hours a day, sevendays a week.
Their nervous system is firedoff all the time, you know,
constantly aware of whetherthey're safe or not safe, you
(51:25):
know, and it's a similar thingbecause it's like your body's
still firing, it's still firing,still firing.
So it it it's.
Not everybody can understandthe different levels of pain
that people experience, but Ithink everybody can understand
(51:48):
that, a, they've experiencedpain at some level that maybe
they can relate.
B, they know somebody that thiswork you're doing can help.
Or C, maybe it's something thatthey're passionate about too
and want to learn more and helpand do something.
Alyssa Mortel (52:10):
But definitely a chronic, can be considered
chronic illness because it issomething that affects every
single system of the bodyBecause, like you said, you're
firing.
I mean, that's cortisol, that'snorepinephrine, that is dumping
, everything that that isputting your body into fight,
flight freeze.
That affects your gut, thataffects your brain, that affects
(52:30):
everything.
Mental disorders, depression,adhd, anxiety, ptsd, those are
all.
Those are all chronic illnesses, you know, or could be
considered them, because itaffects everything that you do.
You know, my book covers a lotof those mental disorders,
because did you know thatthere's more signals coming from
(52:53):
the gut to the brain than theother way around?
Really, yeah, they're callingit the second brain and those
were just that.
I mean, there's a recentdiscoveries.
Catherine Daniels (53:04):
That's unbelievable.
Alyssa Mortel (53:05):
Right, these are amazing things that we're just
discovering, um, and people needto know these things.
People need to be talking aboutthese things because so many
people suffer.
It's that we're raised in the90s, you know.
We're just discovering thethings that we ate and the way
that we were born.
(53:26):
Even we we're sufferingextremely from that.
I personally was you know thismight be too much information,
but I was a emergency C-sectionand because I wasn't swabbed
properly, I didn't get amicrobiome, so my gut has never
(53:46):
been correct a microbiome, so mygut has never been correct.
So those signals that I shouldbe receiving, I didn't get that.
So I had to discover my properdiet later, later, later in life
.
So the way that I eat reallyaffects my, the way that my day
goes.
That's interesting, really,really important things, and
(54:08):
that is from birth.
Catherine Daniels (54:10):
Yeah, well, you look at even more recently,
with 2020 and the lockdown.
That's trauma, oh, huge Toevery single human being on the
planet.
Yeah, and I say this all thetime where is that trauma gonna
(54:30):
attach in the body?
Because every human has beenthrough something with that
experience, yeah, so where doesit attach?
And then, you know, does itdevelop into something more.
And, like you were saying, youknow the long covid you're
hearing about that more and morewhere people are just suffering
(54:52):
for long, long durations oftime and all the new things that
are coming out with it makes itreally makes you really makes
you want to think about how weare treating each other too.
Right, because now more thanever, there's this narrative
(55:16):
going around that we should allbe against each other, but
everybody that listens to thisplatform knows that part of the
mission is to build a bridgearound the world and unite
people so they're not inisolation, so they're not
feeling alone.
Because you don't have to.
So I think you know yourmessage is just so on point for
(55:41):
everything that I'm doing aswell, and I just can't thank you
enough for being here, and I dohave another question for you,
(56:01):
if I were to pick up your earthangel feather off the ground.
Alyssa Mortel (56:03):
What would your message to the world be?
I think my message to the worldhonestly, is that you're not
alone.
You've never been alone, Evenin the darkest moments of your
heart, where you're in a balland you look like a punching bag
and you're crying and you feelviscerally that you can just
feel alone and your heart isscreaming.
(56:25):
Know that there is someone onthe other side of the world that
is reaching out for you.
That is just someone that justwants to hold your heart and
love you and there is a platformout there for that, and that we
are waiting for you and that Iknow that that voice can be so
(56:45):
loud.
I understand and that we youknow that God and that all of us
understand, because we've allbeen there.
Loneliness and isolation andall of that is a human condition
.
But be compassionate toyourself.
(57:08):
Tell your little person insideof you that you love them and
know that I love you, I'm herefor you and bless you.
Catherine Daniels (57:21):
Alyssa, thank you so so much for being here.
I'm so filled with gratitudeand appreciation.
So so much for being here.
I'm so filled with gratitudeand appreciation.
I just love your heart, I loveyour mission and everything is
yeah.
And for the audience.
If you're wondering where youcan get Alyssa's book, I was
able to get mine on Amazon andit's the Invisible Warriors by
(57:45):
Alyssa Mortel, living Strongwith a better understanding of
chronic illness.
Thank you again, Alyssa.
Thank you so much.
And this is Catherine Daniels,with Retreat to Peace, reminding
you to live your authentic lifein peace and, as always,
retreat to Peace and we'll seeyou next time.
(58:06):
Welcome to Retreat to Peace.
We're excited to have you today.
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