The Fall Of Nickelodeon: The Teen Nick Iceberg | RMTS 139 - RMTS Podcast

Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Holy shit. You know I saythis every single fucking time, but it's
actually bat this time. Yeah,And it feels really fucking weird because I
felt absolutely dead last week and Iwas like, I need, I need
to record. There's so much fuckinggoing on. There's so crazy things going
on, and I'm fucked up.I'm getting berated on subreddits. We're sitting

(00:23):
here and not even talking because I'msick as a dog. I can't pick
up my phone other than hearing fiftyfucking reddit notifications. Holy shit, it's
been one hell of a fucking weekI had. Yeah, I had the
flu. I was getting berated online. It was a blast. It looks
like I'm a fucking pussy as hell, but you know, I'm back.
It's been It's been one hell ofa week. That was the worst flu

(00:46):
I've had in a very very,very long fucking time. Dang. Yeah,
three kids and me having the flu. It was not not a fun
time. All of us had bodyaches, all of us had the fucking
fever. All of us didn't wantto fucking do anything except the baby,
who, for some reason, evenwhile she was sick, was running around
like a crazy person. It wasa It was a blast. I find

(01:07):
it funny because like, yeah,that's how all the shows just start now,
and I'm like, this is thisour thing where we just go oh
holy shit, ah damn recording issues. Who even knows what's going on anymore,
because like Joe Rogan, they're justlike wait, wait, wait,
we were talking about this before thepodcast. Hold on to the story that
makes sense for them. For us, we're just like it's all broken.
Follow us, like, come subscribe. It feels like everything is so disconnected

(01:32):
time wise, and I don't knowif that's just my adhd Like we could
record yesterday and I'm like, ohfuck, dude, it feels like it's
been forever since I've talked to you, or it could be two weeks and
I'm like, oh fuck, Ireally haven't said anything until it's time to
work again. I'm like, fuck, I feel like an asshole ninety percent
of the time. But it's like, Okay, things are going good.
There's nothing really that means work.I can't work right now, so you

(01:53):
know, it is what it is. We went from having you know,
a handful of people being like thisweek and I'm like, nope, now
I'm dead. I can't do anything, because you know, obviously, yeah,
it was a shitty time, butit is what it is. We're
fucking back, and holy fucking hell, everything fucking happened this week, and
so I don't know if you sawthe first part of it. On top

(02:15):
of me being sick, then afucking earthquake happens in fucking New Jersey that
affected almost all of New York Cityand almost all of upstate New York.
I didn't hear about that. So, and obviously everybody knows earthquakes happen on
a scale of zero to ten andit's point ratings and all of that stuff.

(02:39):
We get a four point eight earthquake, and everybody uses that as a
reason to say, oh, yeah, you know the world is going to
end on four eight. What happenedon four eight? The fucking eclipse happened
on four eight. So they're like, look, okay, now, now,
man, we have an earthquake thathappens it's a four point eight earthquake.

(02:59):
Then we have an eclipse that's happeningon four four to eight or April
eighth that goes through I think itwas like seven towns named Nineveh or heaven
backwards, like Holy fucking hell.What the fuck is this? Like the
occurrences that are happening right now arereally fucking weird, and I don't understand
what the hell is going on becauseso much of it is just so directly

(03:23):
fucking coincidental. But that those numbersjust don't repeat themselves like that, things
don't occur like that where it's justlike all lined up. What the fuck
is going on? I think that'sjust crack pot conspiracy stuff. I saw
like one chick from the View talkingabout how, oh, global warming is
why we're getting eclipses because everyone's justlost their mind and coincidences are getting more

(03:46):
common, which is weird. LikeI'll be talking about some of my friend
They're like, yo, I thoughtabout that yesterday. Like all right,
and at the very least the simulationsbreaking down, But I don't think we're
at calls for concern over eclipse andearthquake just yet. The thing was,
there was a thing that went outright before that eclipse happened. I think
it was probably on Saturday after theearthquake, which kind of makes sense.

(04:09):
They're like, there is correlation inbetween the tectonic plates and the moon because
it's obviously gravitational pull and stuff likethat. I would assume that there would
be just like the tides and everythingelse. I was like, wait,
could that be that the eclipse actuallywas a part of that, because that's
kind of weird. No, becausethe moon's always up there, the Moon's

(04:32):
always circling and are like always doingthe same path. It only matters if
it gets in the way of thesun it or does it change slight rotational
pull inching shit like that. Iagree with you. I don't think that
there is a coincidence and a connection. To me, I thought, yeah,
you're just bringing this up as atopic. I thought you were going
the flu fucked you up and youwere taking this seriously. No, there

(04:56):
are some people that are so offthe beaten path that they assume that all
of this shit it is fucking real. But yeah, there is starting to
be a lot of fucking coincidences whereit's like, what the fuck is going
on? Because this shit is gettingweird. Shit is weird. Yeah,
you can't give the crazy people thisstuff. It's it's not good for anyone
because that now everyone's looking out outof line. Oh I love making everybody
look like, what the fuck isgoing on because some of the shit just

(05:17):
doesn't make sense. There's no reasonwhy there should be a four point eight
earthquake two days before four eight,and there's an earthquake an eclipse scheduled for
four eight on the same day thatthey're like, yeah, we're just gonna
reschedule the eclipse for the next daybecause there's a rain. Now, Like,
what the fuck is going on?You people either are hilarious or fucking
weirdos mm hmm. And then allthe states of emergency that were being declared,

(05:43):
it's like declared state emergency for aneclipse that that never happened before.
And then people like this is aonce in a lifetime thing. What happened
to the one that like passed throughOrgon like six years ago, Like some
people just don't remember what happened whenthat happened. Was there a total eclipse
like complete blast? Yeah, itwas total, Like there was there was
like that line where it's like atotal eclipse like through Oregon, I think
a little bit of like Nevada andstuff. So I had ninety five percent

(06:08):
or so, and they had waittimes on the New York State through A
which is our road system that goesfrom New York City all the way through
to Buffalo, and it's a paidtoll road. They had about our hour
and fifteen minute travel times for thirtymiles, so stop and go traffic for

(06:30):
about every thirty to forty miles.As you got closer and closer to the
one hundred percent, I was like, what the fuck is going on?
We legitimately needed a state of emergencybecause the fucking travel was retarded and only
going north and west southbound was completelyopen. There was nobody going south because
everybody wanted to be here for somereason. And the thing is, like

(06:53):
the path was so long this time. It just put diagonally across the US
so much that like anyone could goneanywhere and kind of seen it. But
for some reason, like everyone justgot into the mass formation of like I
gotta see this now. It's it'sonce in a lifetime. Oh there's no
more water or the gas station.I'm going to take all the water and
all the snacks. But there wasa five to ten percent difference across the

(07:14):
entire state of New York State.Why the fuck do you have to travel
from New York City four hours outof your way to see one hundred percent.
You're not seeing a difference, You'rejust more likely to go blind.
That is about it. That's lesslikely ninety five one h wouldn't that be
less less likely the one hundred percentif I remember correctly, the more percentage

(07:38):
that it got blacked out as itwas coming back, it was more likely
to cause you to go blind becauseit was more focused. But I could
be wrong in that could my mindworking logically? If that is correct,
though, that's like the interesting likeooh numbers and fun stuff. Who would
have guessed because then it's not asbig of a drastic change, like if
you're ninety five percent black and thebottom is still show and you're still gonna

(08:00):
have that glare always instead of justthe one hundred percent black to then the
light peeking through, which then iswhat blind you. Yeah. Also,
I guess like it could also maybejust be like a stupid thing where it's
like people then start looking at it'slike, oh, it's one hundred percent,
I'm safe, and then they getfucking fried instead of like at ninety
five. I don't trust it.I did see a short of a kid

(08:22):
going blind and I was like,this is sad, and then I was
like, wait, how do younot pay so much attention to your kid
that's standing right next to you thatthey that you didn't watch them take off
their glasses when you said, hey, the eclipse is over. After I'm
done watching the eclipse and I start, you know, figuring out what the
hell is going on with life again, your eyes should be on your kid

(08:45):
making sure that they're not doing dumbthings that will impact their life. The
fact that you let your kid goblind absolutely asinine. If you cannot trust
your kid to keep glasses on forfucking ten minutes, your kid's not fucking
be outside watching the eclipse. It'snot rocket science, it's not hard.
It's fucking stupidity. Yeah, andthere were some weird announcements inside those states

(09:09):
of emergency, like one of thegovernors or a mayor or something was like,
oh, and know where all theemergency shelters are, just in case
something happens. And that made theconspiracy theories to just like lose it,
like, why are you saying thisIf it's just an eclipse, everyone's going
mad. Well, in the announcementsfor the one that went across Oregon and

(09:30):
all of that, I believe theyjust said, hey, don't look at
it unless you have the classes onand everything else. And then and also
there's gonna be more people around,so you know, yeah, things might
get a little weird. And theannouncements for this one it was make sure
to have two to three weeks worthof food, Like what the fuck?
And then the earthquake happens, whichmakes it look even worse. Yeah,

(09:52):
it's like, what the fuck isgoing you? You're you guys are tattling
on yourself right now. You guysare making this look really fucking the fuck
is going on? Yeah, becausethat's what the conspiracy theoris say, like
if something happens, it was plannedby them, and that's why they're trying
to like prep this and like ifsomething did happens, Like why why we're

(10:15):
we told to be ready for somethingto happen when it's just the mood going
in front of the sun. It'sbeen doing that forever and there were no
problems ever before. It was itwas really really funny. It was a
weird. Yeah. My uh,my daughter has one of the fucking blondest
takes I've ever heard her say inmy life. I love her so dearly

(10:35):
and she is fucking hilarious. Butshe looks at me, she's like,
Dad, it's it's like three twentysix at this time, and online has
said, Hey, we're supposed tosee this at three twenty five. She's
like that, I don't know whatthe hell's going on. Maybe maybe we
just need to look at the otherside of the sun. My child,

(10:56):
Child, you don't fucking say thosethings, like you don't like walk downstairs.
You really wouldn't like walking across thetown. You don't want to try
and figure out how to walk acrossto see the other side of the sun
because it's not possible. But whatthe fuck are you talking about? The
other side of the sun is wherethe eclipse is. The fuck are you

(11:18):
doing? What the fuck is theschool teaching you? I'm like, the
fuck. She's like, oh,fuck, I understand. And it clicked
as soon as she said it.I'm like, come on, that's some
fourteen hundred shit that the moon goesbehind the sun and the sun gets closer
to the Earth. Nah. Iwas just like, fuck, man,

(11:41):
fuck, come on, child.I love you to death, But that
was the blondest thing I've heard yousay in a very, very long time.
And it was. It was facepalming. So in the level of
stupidity that is going on and thelevel of fucking people going absolutely erratic,
everybody's bitching and complaining, saying thethe inflation is not happening. Inflation is

(12:05):
not happening. What do you thinkof subway? What is the first thing
you think of other than creepy Jared? I mean, five dollars foot long?
But that's been dead since even likebefore Trump. That was that was
like a bomb error that ended.You probably remember this image right here,

(12:26):
no one, yep, I beatit. I beat it with the hand.
Haha, five dollars foot long.Then you know, it gets really
fucking weird when now we're six inchessix bucks. I didn't see that.
That's fucked up. Make that goaway? Six bucks six inches. You

(12:48):
know what gets read? I can'tbe I guess the marketing for that is
like, oh, that's definitely goingviral on Twitter, and there's gonna be
so many dick jokes about it.But that can't be real, Like,
and I know that that's the priceof subway, But no, it gets
it gets really weird. When Iused to work at Subway and I was
like, okay, you know,it was great I could get a six

(13:09):
inch sandwich for two sixteen because itwas the employee meal, and it was
great and fantastic to be able toget whatever the fuck I wanted for two
sixteen. Now I can even makethe joke of I can give you six
inches for dinner and six inches inbed, and I'm like, fuck both
of them for six bucks. That'spretty good. They you keep talking about

(13:33):
five dollars foot longs. Yeah,you have two of the six's, you
need the third. Now there's afourth six exactly. Fucking hell man,
what the fuck is going on withthis world? But everything is so inflated
that we legitimately cut our intake ofSubway a shitty fucking non sandwich in a
half and instead of eight sandwiches thatthey give you for five dollars, there's

(13:58):
only fucking five choices now for sixdollars, and you get half the size.
I mean, there wasn't there fora while, like after they killed
the five dollars foot long because thatwas an outrageous deal. I can't sustain
that forever. I will not faultSubway on that. Didn't they have like
a six inch meal where like yougot a cookie and a drink and a
sandwich for five dollars for six inch. That was always a thing. Yeah,

(14:20):
that was the thing. When thatwent away, I got scared,
like I was just like, whoa, now, there's no value in you.
They had a six dollars foot longtwo. That was the thing that
lasted after the foot long for fivedollars. Yeah, remember that, Like
daylight value sandwiches. You're going onWednesday and you get a ham sandwich for
six yep. And then they hadthe daily thing and it was this specific

(14:43):
sandwich only went the sweet sweet onionchicken taraokey day. The only sandwich that
is worth anything a fucking subway yeap, yep. It's the only thing.
It's really really weird the things thatI used to make when I worked at
Subway. I've tried absolutely everything otherthan the tuna and the meat balls,
and I've made pizza and everything elseside of that bread. Trust me,

(15:07):
chicken karaoki is the only thing that'sfucking worth it. But the fact that
you have to spend twelve dollars probablyto get a foot long sweet onion chicken
karaioki is fucking asinine. And talkingabout inflation. I've been seeing a lot
of people like reminisce, like weused to have a dollar menu, we
used to have everything, and nowit's four dollars for a McChicken. Been

(15:28):
seeing that stuff? Are you fuckingserious? Yeah? I kind of want.
And it's not door dash like theygo, but it's it's kind of
like a priceier area. It's like, this is what a New York make
Chicken looks like on the website,and it's not even like DoorDash prices they
use the app I would assume,yeah, but it's also just like it
says their menu and you could dolike dine in kind of pricing. Yep,

(15:48):
exactly exactly, but even like stilllike three dollars. Now. The
weird thing is I have I haveall kinds of weird lore in my head.
So when I was doing my stocktrading and I lost a fuck ton
of money, I was I wasjust like paying attention to weird things.
So McDonald's announced that they were killingthe dollar menu and the stock went up
seven percent. Great for business,and I was just like, wow,

(16:11):
everyone's all like this is just gonnalead to more profit and it doesn't matter
because everyone's just addicted to McDonald's anyways, so they get away with it,
and then everyone's on Twitter complaining likewhy is everything so expensive? Why did
we let them take this from us? Because you keep buying it at fifteen
dollars m I remember when they addedthe uh, the buffalo chicken Buffalo ranch

(16:36):
McChicken before they added the spicy McChicken, and that shit was fucking fire.
Every time I would go to work, i'd go get two Buffalo Ranch mcchickens.
I'd go half a mile and whenI pulled out of McDonald's, i'd
finish the entire French fry in betweenthere and the front door work, and
everybody would be like, wait,what the fuck did you just do?

(16:56):
Exactly, I like a fucking pig. I had a large French fry and
a half a mile, but herewe go. I remember when those were
a dollar fifty each and it wasfucking fire. Back in twenty eleven,
while I was like first working andliving on my own, I would go
into Jack in the Box, Jackin the Box, one dollar chickens best

(17:18):
sandwich. The sad thing is islike a lot of them are just extremely
inconsistent. So like if you goto Burger King. They're mc chickens,
not mcchickens, but they're they're chickensandwiches. If you get the sauce one,
they're fucking horrible. The sweet spicyfood is just fucking that shits gross.
I don't want brown fucking sugar onmy spicy chicken sandwich. It's fucking

(17:44):
disgusting. If I ordered buffalo sandwich, I want buffalo sauce on my damn
chicken, not anything else. Butthat shit's still like fucking five six dollars,
and they fucking leave it in thefucking heater thing and it gets fucking
crunchy and ride out and it getsfucking disgusting. It's like you want to
throw it across the room. Andthe only thing that's keeping me outside moist

(18:06):
is the fact that it has brownsugar on it. It's fucking gross.
My friends, Yeah, because Iwas always savvy with the value menu and
like building my combos and stuff,like, they would just like spend ten
dollars in high school on a Windyor Burger King, and I'm like,
all right, just perfectly craft likea four dollars full meal off the dollar

(18:27):
menu. And then they'd introduce aNew Sandwich where it's like, wait a
second, that's your value chicken withlike extra sauce, and it's three times
the price because you're charging like athree fifty premium game like that is the
same patty. Or what you dois you give that value chicken with another
patty and that patty is only sixtycents, and then your fucking set.
They actually stopped offering the like ajackman box online used to offer like an

(18:49):
extra patty for a dollar twenty,and that's how you could cheat the value
menu and now can't do anymore.My my favorite place to cheat things like
that is when I go to fuckingChipotle and you ask them, hey,
can I get a couple of tortillason the side. If you say couple,
you're not telling them exactly how manyyou want, So they're not gonna
sit there and tell the register howmany they threw in that wrapper to hand

(19:11):
it to you. They're just gonnathrow a couple in a fucking piece of
aluminum foil and throw it down thething. And if you're and if you
ask for double rice and double veggiesand double salsa and double cheese, they
do not charge you a single dimeextra other than that tortilla and whatever meat
you get, nothing else is extra. It's for ten dollars, you get

(19:33):
three meals worth of fucking food,depending on how you fucking do it.
Like that's a gamble. Some placesthey're they they're tired of your bullshit,
and they're they're like, no,you make sure you charge them for every
fucking tortilla. Even if you chargeme a dollar fifty for each tortilla,
I don't care. Tell dollars forthree meals is still four dollars a fucking

(19:53):
meal. I don't care. Butthose fucking tortillas are fucking good. It
used to be. Yeah, that'swhat I mean. Like I try to
make a burrito at home, It'slike, why is my tortilla shit?
I've tried every tortilla in the isleof Walmart. I toasted up a little
bit, I warm it. It'sjust not the same as a Chipotle tortilla

(20:14):
there. And there's only one kindof tortilla sell I like for Walmart at
all, and it's the mission fuckingwhite flower tortillas. All of the other
ones are shit, all of them. But I think it's because they mix
flour and corn at Chipotle, theydo something special. I think that's why.
Yeah. Yeah, But like Chipotle, it used to be great because

(20:36):
like you could just say double tortillaand they wouldn't charge you. And now
it's sixty cents, and now it'seighty five cents. So oh, I
don't even care if it's a dollarfifty man, Like I just oh,
yeah, I know that. Butlike it used to be like you could
you could at you could say like, hey, can give me a little
more, and they would give youa little more. Now they'll they'll either
look at you weird or they'll belike, that'll be an extra dollar because
that's a second serving, you asshole. So give me the full entire second

(20:59):
serving. I will wait until yougive me that full entire scoop of chicken.
So way, I know how muchi'm asking for the second time,
because I know how much you're notgonna cheap out on me now because I
got you in the fucking game.You gave me more than that last time.
And I will call them out everysingle time, like, yeah,
half a scoop and I'm like,no, I'm not paying double for that.
Give it, give me more more. I don't care if the burrito

(21:22):
rips apart. That's why I'm askingfor three more tortillas. Oh I got,
I get the bowl. I getthe bowl with the tortillas on the
sad. So I could also usedto be a cheat, but then everyone
was doing that. Now they're actuallygiving you like the same portions as a
burrito inside the bowl. Everything's ruined. I don't know, man, I
fucking I love doing that shit.And if you order online you get slightly

(21:42):
less food, but if you walkin you get more, which is kind
of a weird thing too. Sowhat's this shit about menu anxiety? Because
you were you were telling me aboutthis. Gen zis suffers from anxiety and
dining out. Yeah, so genZ millennials. All I do is ran
about them. All I do iscomplain younger generations are screwed up, brain

(22:04):
rot, social media, all thatfun stuff. I'm black pill to hell.
But when I saw this, Iwas just like, I'm not wrong.
You can hate on gen Z allyou want, and it's as deserved.
So this article from New York Posttalks about menu anxiety. I've never
fucking heard of menu anxiety, Buteighty six percent of gen Z adults so
age sixteen to twenty four admitted theysuffer from menu anxiety, anxiety when ordering

(22:29):
so like they can't they're so online, they cannot socialize, they cannot function
in the real world, and onethird thirty four percent are so anxious they
need a friend to order their food. How has it gotten that bad?
I was sitting here looking at this, and I was like, Oh,
maybe maybe they're just ordering their chickennuggies and their fucking chalky milk and that's
all they're ordering. And I waslike, Okay, I get it.

(22:52):
Like, you know, there aredays where I am feeling fucking more spurgy
and more autistic, and I'm like, you know what, I just want
the comfort for dude, give methe thing that I will normally order from
every restaurant because I know it'll besemi acceptable. I just want something good.
I'll stay with something I know.I thought that's what this was gonna
be, was like sticking to whatyou know and kind of not ordering burgers

(23:15):
out because they make you sick sometimes, or not wanting to order beef because
you don't know exactly how it's cooked. Like I thought it was gonna be
something like that, where you likethey're protecting them. Yeah, yeahere,
it's just like, oh, Idon't know how a new food might go
because I'm used to my thing andthey could fuck it up. And that
just makes me feel like, no, this is I cannot make contact with
the waiter and I have to justlook down and like rehearse my meal for

(23:37):
five minutes, and that fucking makesme anxious. Because all the kids run
well and a third of them needcan't even do it. They can't even
look at someone and be like,yeah, I'll have the number five,
or like, yo, can yougive me like the pancakes with the sausage
a little bit of extra bacon.I know, it's like fifty cents by
school. No one can. Youcan't talk to people exactly, like how
hard is it for you just tosay what the fuck you? Like?

(24:00):
What the fuck is going on thateverybody is so terminally fucking ill that they
can't have a communication with somebody elsethat they're not completely connected to, Especially
in business situation. It's not likea homeless person on the street. It's
like this is gonna be a formalinteraction. Everyone's here for the same thing,
and you just can't even find itin yourself to do that in a

(24:22):
reasonable way, like it just itmakes absolutely no sense to me that some
people are just so disconnected and availableto unavailable to speak to people that they're
like, oh, yeah, Ijust talking to people. I don't I
don't get it. The fuck isthey don't even get it. They're terrified
of it. Like I was legitimatelytold today, not today, last week.

(24:47):
Oh I don't understand how to talkto people. I speak too much
irant, and I am completely uncomfortableand non charismatic. Like what the fuck
are you talking about? Who areyou saying like people like I show speed
is just charisma that that guy knowshow to talk to people. Motherfucker,
we're all fucking autistic. Every singleperson now is autistic to some level to

(25:11):
where they're sort of uncomfortable with talkingto people. But you wont know how
many people will sit there and havea conversation with me and enjoy it enough
to the point where they want tocome back and have another one ninety nine
percent. I want to hear thecrazy thing. Most people don't like people
like that. The fuck are youtalking about? This shit? This shit
where everybody is so fucking obscured andfucking disconnected from life that they don't want

(25:36):
to speak to somebody who's serving them. Yeah, this is that fear that
everybody bred in the late nineties earlytwo thousands, where they're like, oh,
we spit in your food, wepiss in your drink. I'm surprised
that restaurants are still open if thisis how anxious everybody is going there to
order their food, because you know, for damn sure, it's probably that

(25:57):
fear. It's probably not talking topeople. It's probably if I interact with
you incorrectly and I'm uncomfortable doing it, then all of a sudden, You're
going to piss in my drink.I don't think it's that bad. Like
again, when you look at thestudies and you look at how people are
saying also, like this is aTwitter thread and people responding, it's not
like, oh, I'm afraid I'mgonna mess it up and offend someone and

(26:18):
get like my food piston. It'slike, no, I can't talk to
people anywhere at all in society.I can only function online because that's just
what's happened to everyone under thirty.I don't know the only person I've ever
seen anxious is my mom. Andmy mom would only struggle when we would
go out with my aunt, myaunt Sharon, and she is one of

(26:38):
those perfectionist peoples that if you handleher food and she orders runny eggs,
that if they're not exactly how sheperceived them that she wanted them, she
will hand them back and say theseare not how I ordered them, Please
go cook them again. I'm notmad, just please fix my food so
that way I'm eating exactly how whatI ordered. I was like, I'm

(26:59):
gonna get give you a tip.Just do what I ask. That's all
I'm asking you to do. Andthe second that she would say anything like
that, my mom would have apanic attack to the point where she would
just not want the confrontation, likeit's sad because it's like, okay that
I understand you're asking more above andbeyond that. They will get mad at,
they will be frustrated at because you'reasking them to do their job.

(27:22):
But the fact that people are afraidto be like, hey, I want
this or I need this, andit's not just I want chicky nuggies.
I don't fucking get it. Idon't fucking get it. You people are
fucking weird. I don't understand.Yeah, eighty four percent of zoomers get
venue anxiety, and that's like,that's who you're interacting with on Twitter.

(27:45):
Just that that. It always goesback to that George Carlin quote. Think
about how stupid the average person isand then realize other half are dumber than
that. It's weird when I makemy kids order their own food, Like,
my kids can do something that youfucking retards can't because you're actually aware,

(28:07):
you know what's going on. You'relike, no, I can't let
them turn it into whatever reddit inTwitter and Tumblr turn these freaks into no,
And I honestly that's exactly what youshould do with your kids. Or
like, if you have friends thatare younger than you, hey, don't
talk for them. Don't don't leadto the level of where you're controlling the
circle. Push the circle to makethe circle better. That's your fucking job.

(28:30):
Not just sit with your thumb upyour abs. What the fuck are
you doing? Don't do things forpeople like there's zero fucking reason for it.
That's so that creates more anxiety.That creates more anxiety, and then
they'll complain about it on Twitter becauseit's one of those things like have you
seen the posts where it's like,oh, every time I leave the room,
my family goes, hey, lookwho came out, and that gives
me more anxiety. So be thesame thing where it's like, you can

(28:52):
do it, John, Today isthe time you order for yourself. And
then you put more pressure on themand then they shut in even more because
again they have no social interaction capability. Did you did you ever get that
ship where oh, you finally cameout of the dungeon? Yeah, because
once my oldest was born, wekind of just pushed to ourselves and kind
of created our family and kind ofjust stuck to ourselves and kind of insulated

(29:18):
that thing, which obviously is goingto create a very very insular kind of
situation. You're not going to beas connected to the outside house and stuff
like that. Regardless of if welive together, there's still a disconnect with
that door because inside that room itis just a singular family. Not too
and it was oh, look atwho came out of the dungeon. Look

(29:38):
at who does this? Look atwho does that? Oh look are they
going to come out of the dungeontoday? And it's just like, guys,
that's that's not how you interact withpeople. Like this is so and
like, looking back at it nowas like an adult, it's like,
that is so autistic. Oh,you're going to poke at the person who's
taken care of a house essentially insideof a room that you're so you're gonna

(30:02):
pick and point at them and belike, oh, look you kay?
Would you do that if somebody walkedthrough the door, Hey, look you
came today. The funck's your problem? That's fucking weird. Yeah, if
you're then if you try to dothat in the same kind of way in
your friend group where it's just like, ah, the one that like needs
more pulling up because they're antisocial,Well, if you make too big of

(30:22):
a deal out of it, itkind of gives the same effect exactly.
So don't make a fucking big dealabout it at all, especially when you
know people are dealing with depression.But then how do you say it,
like, Okay, it's your turnto order, you can do it this
time. They'll see that as condescendingbecause they've fit they've had to make you
order for them the last ten times. Don't do it the first time you
sit there and stare at them likethis, Yeah, I guess, I

(30:45):
guess that's I guess that's the onlyway to stop it. Like you cut
it before any possibility comes through yourlife. Like someone just goes like,
hey, I don't know how toorder, and then you just go you're
retarded, you're ordering. If youfuck it up, you're never seeing this
person again, exactly like, whatare you gonna do? Stumble over your
words? Everyone does, what areyou gonna do? What is so wrong?

(31:08):
Are you gonna order mayonnaise on yoursandwich when you don't eat mayonnaise?
It's not hard. Just know howto say it, like and you've you've
ordered food since you were fucking tooyou know. These are people like the
helicopter parents, where their parents havealways ordered their food, even in the
like they're twelve. It's like,hey, monk, you get me the
number five. But even if itis that, you still know the order

(31:33):
in the process of I want twomc chickens plain buffalo ranch on the side,
saway, I have sauce to dipin with a large fry salt on
the side, please, saway,I get my fresh French fries and a
large berry sprite. It's not fuckingcomplex. You go through the entire meal
of what the fuck you want andyou ask for it. It's not fucking
hard. It's not hard. Well, the problem is the people that watch

(31:59):
this should hopefully understand that it's nothard because they're with it like us.
I think there's still some freaks outthere. But exactly, we got lower,
we got lower percentage. So ifyou're struggling, I'm disappointed in you.
And that's exactly. Don't make daddyartless sad. Don't you call me
that? No? No, whynot getting rid from your fucking collar always?

(32:23):
You know, why not? Whynot make it more uncomfortable? Shit's
fucking insane. Man thirty thirty twominutes without butt plug or color comment.
We're doing better, exactly, brother, I told you. There are gonna
be times where it's a comfort joketo make other people comfort comfortable, and
there are gonna be times where it'sa friendly rib, like my fucking retardation

(32:44):
is for you. It's just sometimesit's there and sometimes it doesn't need to
be. Making fun of these retardsthat are literally being content formed for saying
collar, Why the fuck would Ilisten? Literally, you're doing what I
want you to do, you fuckingretard. That's why it's there. Fucking
idiots. I love it. Ugh, So do you want to go into

(33:07):
my new tattoo that I'm going toget or do you want to talk about
these retards on Reddit that are bitchingand complaining tattoo? Let's get that out
of the way, because like thatwas the more vague one. I could
send you a link of like what'sgoing on? Like I'm ready for this
conversation. I don't know what's goingon with your tattoo. Well, it
was more or less a very veryadhd thought as I was watching a documentary

(33:30):
last night. So I don't knowif you watch wrestling or anything like that
or watched it when you were little, No, but I never cared for
it, but I understand it.So there was this character named Bray Wyatt.
He essentially was a cult like kindof character, and he kind of
led a group and he kind ofblew up and made it that way.

(33:50):
He when he walked out to hisentrance music, the entire crowd would use
the flashlight on their phones like everybodydid back in the day with lighters and
stuff like that, and it becamehis thing. So soon instead of it
just being half the people that werethere, the entire crowds would light up,
which was fucking insane to watch,like the occult like leader grow a

(34:15):
fan base essentially because you can actuallysee the fan base change, which was
interesting. He kind of helped medevelop how I speak and stuff like that,
which is kind of more interesting.But then it started going into like
his death because he died of aVID. He ended up having heart problems
because of it, and he passedaway last year, damn. And uh,

(34:39):
it was kind of like a retrospectiveon his him being a father and
all that stuff, and like he'sjust an insanely, insanely unique, creative
kind of person. He created charactersthat had like superpowers, but that were
kind of in that gray area ofwhat the fuck is going on? Not
completely disbelieve, but completely like whatthe fuck are you going to do next?

(35:05):
So like that gray area where it'sjust uncomfortable, like you're popping out
randomly, you're making weird things fuckingappear, you're becoming a demon and you're
healing yourself, but not I'm goingto summon hell fire everywhere, like not
weird shit, but like weird shit, but the gray area. Weird shit.
Yeah, But then the documentary startedbreaking into like his family and like,

(35:29):
oh, he's one of the greatestads, Like I wish that I
could tell him that, and Iwish that I could kind of bring that
out and give him the availability forhim to hear that. And I sat
there and I was like, Okay, well, now I have a tattoo
idea. Now I have a rantidea for this show, because I want
to be able to say that parttoo. So are you aware of the

(35:52):
you no evil speak, no evilhere, no evil kind of idea?
So to me, that seems veryvery wreck towards me because obviously you see
no evil. You're dealing with nothingthat you can deal with. Your anger
is at bay because you cannot seewhat the fuck is going on. You're
you're hiding yourself from evil, butyour anger is there. So I'm going

(36:15):
to get adjacent mask with neon lightscovering the eyes, the anger blind anger.
And then there was a wrestler nameSting from the nineties who faced hull
Cogan, and hul Cogan was thebig bad guy who developed a nWo and
he didn't speak for a year anda half. So I drew him with

(36:35):
the neon stitches across his mouth becauseit kind of makes sense. And I
drew Deadpool as here no Evil becausehe's kind of the eccentric version of me
of like, I'm just gonna saywhatever the fuck I want and it doesn't
matter what the fuck you say.I'm just going to be me like and
I thought it was funny because it'slike a nod to my kids. I'm
going to give you everything. Therecan be times where I'm fucking quiet when

(36:59):
I need to be quiet. There'sgonna be times where I'm absolutely just angry
and dealing with everything I possibly canwithout paying attention to what's going to happen
to me. I'm doing it becauseof you, So see no Evil and
then hear no Evil. I'm goingto say whatever the fuck I have to
say, and I'm not going tolisten to the repercussions of it because you
need me to say it. SoI'm going to get that those three faces

(37:21):
on the on the front of myarm and then on the inside at a
different point, obviously, because it'sgoing to be fucking expensive. I'm gonna
it's going to say something similar toI'm always next to you as a nod
to my kids. Hey, I'mhere regardless. All three of these people
are here, regardless, next toyou, no matter what you need at
that point. I'm here because watchingthat doc made me realize that the only

(37:45):
time that a guy will hear,oh, I'm happy about you, I'm
happy that you're here. I'm happythat you were able to accomplish this thing.
They will never hear it because it'sthe day they die. Yeah,
you won't. You won't say thatshit. Nobody will. Nobody will say,
oh, I'm happy you're here.I'm happy that you're a good dad.

(38:06):
I'm happy that you're this person,or you're trying to elevate this or
do this, or you're a creativeperson and your mind so unique. Everybody
is more willing to say that whenthey're dead and those words are meaningless,
instead of giving the person their flowerswhen they could actually use them, when
they're depressed, when they're feeling,when they're dealing with shit. And I'm
like, you know, I dealtwith some of the hardest things keeping my

(38:30):
mouth shut with this camera on.And it's funny because you fucking retards on
Reddit are kicking me for times whereI am so uncomfortable that I turn the
camera on to hold myself accountable,where I might not be able to string
a fucking sentence together because my mindis going fucking ten thousand miles a minute
and I can't put a thought together. But guess what, I'm still here,

(38:52):
and I'm holding myself enough accountable tobe here and not say what's on
my mind and prethink out every singlething that I have to say and not
shade into shit that I can saybecause of court cases and stuff like that
and protect those things. I justlike the transparency of it, and I

(39:14):
kind of parody of it, especiallywith all my other tattoos. I kind
of like the way I'm kind oflined up and the different parts of my
life. I thought it was kindof cool because that's off of characters.
I like, yeah, that's adepth I did not expect out of you,
but it all makes sense. I'mjust like, damn, that is
so reflective and like it all makessense. Well, all of my tattoos

(39:36):
all kind of had to have anod like that. I think that's what
most people a like, where it'slike every tattoo has a story, like
even if it's something weird you justshowing be like oh yeah, this means
that, and then we's like coolor it all it needs to mean something
to you. Well, a lotof people from from the conversations that I
have, Like I have a memorialtattoo from my brother who passed away that
I'm going to get covered up becauseI'm like, nah, not this,
Like it's just too it's too directionaland too important to one specific thing that's

(40:00):
hurt me too badly. But allmy other tattoos have so much tangential meaning
if you ask, but no meaningif you don't pay attention to it at
all. Like every single one ofmy tattoos, all of them are my
individual art. Every single one ofthem I've hand touched. Even even my

(40:21):
fucking Dark Mark. It's not justripped off of the movie and it's the
same exact thing. It's just notbecause if you do that, you're a
fucking weirdo. Yeah, when youwere talking about just like this dude's crazy,
But because of like everything that wentinto it to like get to that
point, it's like, oh yeah, it just actually means a lot and
has very deep meaning that no oneelse is going to get unless you explain

(40:45):
it. But then it actually isreally cool. Well, like my dark
Mark tattoo, if you don't thinkabout it, it doesn't really genuinely make
sense. There's a Deathly Hollows fuckingmark on his head and it's the dark
Mark, which is, you know, opposite sides. Why the fuck does
that make sense? Okay, Well, if you know the story of Harry
Potter, Voldemort is one of thepeople that holds the Deathly Hollows, so

(41:09):
he would be a part of that. So there is parody there. There's
the green smoke from death because ofVodkavadra, so there's death. Oh wait,
who dies to ava Harry Potter.It's Harry Potter's skull and it shows
the death, which would be thedark Mark. It's not complex, but

(41:31):
you have to think about it.You actually have to think. There's the
scorpion from Mortal Kombat and the scorpionfrom Transformers put together. They don't normally
go together if you think about it, but the story of Scorpion and the
story of being able to hide andbe in plain sight and everything else.

(41:52):
It's an ADHD Kid's mirror is whatit's supposed to be. It's you have
relationships with scorpion and caring about somebodyin family, and then you have the
mirror of being able to hide andplay in sight and attack people whenever you
need to. Which is a scorpiona scorpion normally, And also the scorpion
is a symbol of my entire family. Actually, my grandfather actually had a

(42:14):
scorpion on each one of his risks. That's cool. Yeah, and then
I had to do that. Idon't know, I never am Yeah,
I just thought it was cool becauseyou know. But and then I have
the Zelda mark, which obviously ismuch more straightforward than most people would assume.
But it's like, well, whichtriforce of meaning? Are you wisdom?

(42:37):
Are you power? What's going on? It's like yeah, but no,
like that's what people like get into. It's like, yeah, it's
just when the wisdom, it's everythingelse has a story. No, but
the story behind that is much moreunique and in depth than what it really
could be too. It just itdepends on if you want to look at
it and ask the question. AndI remember the last person that I sat

(43:00):
there and had a conversation with,she's like, you know, you should
have all three of those stones becauseyou've dealt with some of the strongest and
craziest hell that most people couldn't imagine. That is courage and that is strength,
but you don't realize it like that. You're more focused on saying,
hey, I'm intelligent, but I'mnot courageous and I'm not powerful, and

(43:21):
none of those things matter. I'mjust going to lead with my intelligence and
I'm going to keep doing and overachievingthe way that I've been shown how to.
I was straightforward with myself, andeverybody's like, hey, no more
than that. I would rather betold that you're more than than not achieving
what you're supposed to do. ButI thought it was cool. I have
this entire arm is like relics,and like parts of this are going to

(43:43):
be like human we're things that areadded to it, and then the rest
are going to be like relics andcracked into my arm, which is going
to be like a stone that youfind out like the Pyramids and stuff.
So it's gonna be like all inBoston stuff like that. Yeah. Yeah.
And then I have my depression,to which I had my daughter draw
right and uh, it says riseabove it, which was the most painful

(44:07):
thing I ever had in my life. Yeah, that's a that's a delicate
sensitive area. Yeah, well,which we call it. I have my
ribs tattoo too, and everybody's likethat, that's so painful. The the
your wrist is painful as the crookof your elbows painful. All of those
sat perfectly fine. The part wheremy muscle was removed from my ribs that

(44:30):
hurt. It hurt, it stung, but it was okay. My thumb
I wanted to kill myself. Jeez, it was so bad. It literally
and and I had nerve damage onthis entire arm. So it's not like
I'm saying, do I really havenerve damage if it hurts so much?

(44:50):
That's why I thought. That's whyI think it's weird. All of the
other ones felt perfectly fine, wasperfectly fine. That was the most pain
I've ever had in this arm wasmy thumb. It would really caused all
of the nerves to flare up.I had problems for like three or four
days. That probably gives deeper meaningsto the whole depression tattoo. Then because
of the pain you went through toget it, well, that that's why
I did it. In red too, obviously with having stories of self harm

(45:13):
and everything else. I was like, okay, so cutting that has to
be a part of it. Iwant I want a nod to that to
myself that even if I don't tellanybody else, which I ended up telling
people anyway. I was like,Okay, I want it in red.
I want it in read because Iwant it to be a nod to that
to push me to do better.And I wanted my kids to be telling
me to judge. It doesn't matterwhat it is. It doesn't matter if

(45:36):
I want to get up today,I need to rise above it. Yeah,
and that isn't like telling people whatyou think before passing. I think
that's like a big thing about likethe silent suffering of men or yeah,
well that's now at least no matterif it's your dad or or your kids,
or like your best friend or evenyou know, your significant other.

(46:00):
There's a weird kind of consistency tolife to where you just kind of don't
tell people how you feel, almostlike you'll kind of just you'll expect them
to know how you feel because Icare. And it's like, that's not
how you should look at things.It shouldn't be oh, well, you
know I care, right, youknow I care. I talk to you

(46:20):
every day, so that therefore thatmeans that must mean something, right,
Like, no, you gotta sayit. There there are so many people
in this world that you would feelbad if they didn't wake up tomorrow,
and if you don't tell them that, you would be sad if they didn't
wake up tomorrow. Then or doyou really care? And honestly to me,
you don't. Yeah, And thenlike and then it happens, and

(46:42):
then everyone's just like all like,oh fuck, it's like you shouldn't you
shouldn't worry or wonder if there isan availability for you to be cared for.
And it's like I and I don'tknow if that's my mental illness of
like I was never fully given that, but it seems like that is such

(47:05):
a struggle for all men now thatit's not just me, and I know
it's not just me, but likethe only way to change that is to
do it myself, and that isreally weird. It's like I will never
see the payoff of that other thanmaybe one or two people, but the
fact that everybody else can see thatpayoff. I give everybody their flowers regardless

(47:29):
of how weird or uncomfortable it is, it doesn't matter well. And I
think if you tell anyone like,hey, don't you think it's weird?
We only like do it after they'redead. Then then they go, ah,
shit, yeah, I don't thinkanyone's going to disagree with that take
and be like, now you bottleit up. They knew. No,
It's just it rubs me the wrongway. It rubs me the wrong way.

(47:50):
Like if you feel somebody is agood dad or somebody you lean on
in the rough times and they've beenthere for you regardless, like thank you
as a step one, not thefinal step, not because they need an
ego stroke, but telling somebody howmuch you care about them because they're there
during your rough times regardless. It'sfucking important mm hmmm, because if you

(48:15):
don't fucking give that to somebody,you don't tell them how much you fucking
care. What are you doing?Why do you matter so much to this
world that you're not going to tellpeople how much they matter? It's fucking
weird to me. It just is. I don't know, man, It's
just it's sad. When it's sad, when you're looking at things and you're

(48:36):
like, I wonder what people wouldsay at my funeral, Like this is
a midlized crisis. Shit, noteven because like I'm not even like oh
I want to make people say thingsat my funeral. It might even be
my introspection and my mental illness beinglike, well, I wonder if they

(48:58):
would give enough of a fuck tosay anything other than like the normal cliche
answers. But I genuinely wonder whatthe fuck people would say, like just
looking at it, like, oh, they're they're gonna say I'm a good
dad, But how many of themreally genuinely give enough of a fuck to
say that? Now, none ofthem. I don't think any of them
really give enough of a fuck tobe like yeah that. It's like you

(49:21):
can't even give me that. That'sthe thing. That's the thing that if
somebody is a good dad, youshould be saying always yeah, I know
you're just hanging out and then likeyou just see like a correction you make
to your challenges, go, holyshit, you're a good dad. No
one doesn't, exactly. The funnything is, yeah, wait real quick,
Like I'm chuckling to myself because there'sthat whole thing where it's like your
personality becomes the last thing you watched. That documentary fucked you up, man,

(49:44):
But it's good getting good introspection.Well, the past three years really
kind of gave me a lot ofintrospection. Like when you go through life
changes to that level you're like,okay, so what do I need to
actually change to make myself for abetter person, Because not every life change,
not every life situation is just onthe other person, just on everybody

(50:09):
else. You have to hold thataccountability for whatever part of that situation is
yours, regardless of if that's ninetypercent of that situation or ten percent of
that situation, there's a part ofthat situation that is yours. And if
you can't be introspective to look atthose things and be like, okay,
well if I said something here,the entire situation changes, or I need

(50:30):
to change this about me, thenthere is no level of you that will
overgrown. And I know that's kindof regressive at some point, but it's
honest and it's the truth. SoI don't think it's just a doc but
as a whole, it's kind ofweird because I do that a lot,
which is why I don't watch contenta lot other than things that kind of

(50:51):
make me giggle. She's on onetonight. Yeah, she's trying to be
the star of the show. Tryto take your blanket now. She just
licks things like she'll about Yep,I'm just letting it go. It's just

(51:16):
I don't know, man, becauseI don't think it negatively affects me.
No. I think a lot ofthose things because I'm able to do them.
It pushes me in the right directionwhere a lot of people would be
like, oh no, I'm perfect. A lot of people will watch that
doc and be like, oh yeah, this is sad, sad story.

(51:37):
It's like, no, there ismore to that. There's more to that.
Oh well, this creative person died. Well we now have these things,
but we could have had the personif we just told them to take
care of themselves slightly differently or slightlybetter. Just like, how are you
so diluted that you want to payattention to that specific part of it that

(51:58):
they're just gone. That's the onlypart of this. It's just like your
job as a humans more than that. I don't know. So all right,
we're striking that off the list.I don't know. It's either I'm
going to keep circling on it,and there's not much more that you're going
to add or you know, changetopics, and if it comes back up,

(52:22):
it comes back up. So yousent me this the other day.
I don't know if you grabbed thelink. So this dude was scared of
jobs? A yes, pull thatshit up, Jamie. Yeah, I'll
bring it up on screen. Deal. So it's this. I don't even
think it's gonna be big enough forit to read. Oh that's say control

(52:45):
plus. Keep going, we canmake it bigger and just scroll. Yeah.
So this post is basically a cryfor help and oversharing after reading a
lot of posts on the subs andother my ADHD is going to struggle with
this because they're not speaking the waythat I speak. So I will probably

(53:06):
add in letters and words I apologize. I'm retarded, so is everyone on
Reddit. So yeah, do youI have this dystopian opinion of jobs as
more of a waste of time inlife. Yes, you can earn money,
but the money will go to theusual requirements like electricity, gas,
water, landlord, food, andso nothing will be left to entertain yourself.
So get a better job or dobetter at life. You fucking read

(53:30):
the better budget. I'm also scaredof having to deal with awful colleagues,
boss and customers. You are horribleat writing, and I'm horrible at writing.
Yes, I'm mentally ill and havedone done a suicide attempt a month
ago after something I should be laughat it, but light the trip of
it, because you can't say thosethings anymore on YouTube. Yep, that

(53:52):
I'm a moron who doesn't see goodin life and cut me off life.
You are fuck this is an Thisis overreaction. I scrambled yepe. He
needs to breathe and get a sixpack, come back and write this again.

(54:13):
Maybe listen to a whole bunch ofpeople talk because fuck yeah, I
feel like I'm retarding myself. Evenin a psych word, I was,
for the lack of a better word, set free with being told by a
psychiatrist, what is the point oftreating you if you don't want to do
anything? Okay, this is likethe weird thing about when you watch like

(54:35):
tumb or not watch. But weread Tumblr and you see how people say
things on Twitter and Reddit where theythink they're making a good point because they're
adding in like grammatical things because thisperson's like, this is an overreaction.
I agree, you know, he'strying to put in those interjecting like comma
things, but it's like, you'reyou're not coming off as more smart.
It's it's what happens when like justmidwits on Reddit are trying to come off

(54:59):
as something deep and thought provoking.I had this one person I kept using
they and thou and thy in likean anti hacking thing against me, and
I'm just like, bro, you'reyou're dumb. Learn how to learn how
to type and learn how to speak, and maybe your life just gets better
right there. So I don't speakcorrectly. I know I don't because I

(55:21):
type and I speak the exact sameway. It's the only way that I
genuinely can write and make a coherentthought. If I get anxious, I
write like this. I absolutely do. I completely understand. But the thing
is is you clicked and put iton Reddit. You had the time to
say do I want this out there? And you decided yes. I'm twenty

(55:45):
one, by the way, andeven for people and even people from ambulance
were surprised. I was that agewith my outlook on life, most likely
because usually teenagers have thoughts like these. I've just never thrown them away.
My parents are, of course nothappy and don't give any out of pocket
money. Obviously, because of allthis, I don't know what to do
with my life. Since I'm toodepressed and pessimistic to move on. I

(56:08):
either stay like this and just forgetabout trying to be common life with my
anxiety and go to work. SoI think you gave me this cooked.
So I'm not gonna say I don'tunderstand the the cookedness of this because being

(56:30):
a creative person, and I'm sureyou felt the same way in a normal
job, you get burnout. Youfeel like you don't give a fuck.
You feel like everything is not goingto be given the way that you expected
to because we were praised by toomany people, too often and too commonly,
and told that we're fucking amazing andeverything's great, and told that everything

(56:53):
is going to be amazing for us, and everything is supposed to be dopamine.
This is what dopamine deficiency looks like. This is a drug addict.
This is an addict, regardless ofwhat they're addicted to, they're addicted to.
I'm feeling bad. I'm going togo get my gratification online and want

(57:15):
to be told that I'm right byeverybody else because they give a fuck.
Motherfucker just because somebody tells you thatyou're right does not mean they give a
fuck. You're just going for fuckingkarma points, and you're using karma points
instead of dopamine because instead of developingself confidence and doing the right thing,

(57:36):
even if you're going to be somebodywho doesn't want to live a long time,
you should try to be living agood time. Don't know what you
need to do to live a goodtime, Work your ass off the half
of the time that you have to, because then you can multiply the things
that you could do that are good. It's not complicated, it's really fucking

(57:57):
not. And this shit is sofrustrating clear that they're mirroring what they've seen,
like that's probably from anti work orno work or something, so like
that's all they say, just like, oh, we shouldn't have to work
forty hours a week, or ohwe should get a living wage no matter
what, and then like all theseother like socialist things and these down bad
kid things, and then they justmirror that and that becomes their personality.

(58:17):
And then they wonder why they're soscrewed up. And it's not insane to
feel like you want those things,because wanting the availability to live based off
of working however much you need toisn't crazy. And like, I know,
I'm very conservative in ninety percent ofthings, but I'm not gonna say

(58:38):
that that's crazy. Working a jobthat you are available to work and wanting
to be able to live off ofthat is not insane. But the thing
is is you have to bring somethingto the table. Saying do you want
fries with that is not bringing somethingto the fucking table. That is the

(59:00):
people that cannot work a normal fuckingjob. That's their job. That's the
kids, that's the people that cannotwork other jobs. Yeah, people not
everything with no skilled jobs. Andthat's where I that's where I'm like,
nah, I can't cope. AllRight, I can't understand you. You
made it so way. We haveto replace those people you made it.

(59:22):
Those people are now going to getfed into being people like fucking customer service
reps. We're going to have peoplethat cannot speak like you that are going
to be dealing with mean motherfuckers likeme. Who's going to be demanding one
hundred and fifty dollars off my internetbill because I had three days worth of
service that was fucked up. Andguess what, because your intelligence isn't as

(59:46):
good as mine, I'm going toachieve in that situation, and you're probably
going to get fired because you're goingto fuck up and give it to me
because I'm mean, And then youlose your job again because you guys want
and to complain and say that youdidn't want to work, and landlords or
assholes, and everybody's mean and everybody'snot nice, and everybody needs to give

(01:00:07):
me a trophy and tell me thatI make thirty dollars an hour. It's
frustrating. It's frustrating because the inflationis half part of the problem, and
the other half part of the problemis you guys, these people that don't
want to do anything and want tobe fucking given everything in the world because

(01:00:30):
you did something. And of coursethey're the perfect customer, right They don't
want to deal with customers or bossesor other coworkers, but they are just
the pinnacle in their mind. Theyknow that they're the great like a coworker
that everyone wants to be with ifthey had the opportunity to be a boss,
they wouldn't be mean, they wouldn'tcome down on anyone, And especially
when they're ordering or you know,interacting with other people, they're always courteous,

(01:00:53):
cordial, and not a hassle foranyone because they don't want to be
in that position. And that's thefrustrating thing. Is like, if you
get sent around keyboard by Amazon,you're gonna need to call that customer service
rep. You're gonna complain, you'regonna get the three months free of Amazon
Pride, You're going to get senton new keyboard, and then you're gonna
be able to keep the old onebecause you're a scumbag and didn't send it

(01:01:15):
back. But you're gonna complain thatyou don't want to work, so you
just got two things for free andyou still kept the fifty dollars, and
then you're going to use that onfood at the restaurant tonight that you're going
to ask your friend to order yourfood for you because you don't know how
to speak to people. The thingis stop mirroring everybody else. That's how

(01:01:39):
you fix this. You become yourown person. That's the hard thing.
That's the thing that everybody picks upme at because there are days where I
struggle, and when I struggle andI get down, I try and mirror
the people around me. So thatway I can be upbeat and I can
be okay regardless of what's going on. And there will be time where I'm

(01:02:00):
fucking down and you'll see me bounceoff the guest or bounce off Furless.
That bring myself up from fucking zeroto five, because my five is probably
better than a lot of people's fives. But if you cannot just be that
on a normal day without having tomirror everybody every day, you will struggle
every day of your life. SoI'm going to tell you how to fix

(01:02:22):
the problem. Unplug from the fuckinginternet. Stop going on Reddit, stop
searching for dope, I mean everywhereyou do everything, and find something that
gives you self esteem. Accept thispodcast, Accept this podcast, follow our
sponsors. We can use the moneytoo, and the ad revenue and the

(01:02:43):
audience retention seventy eight more subs andwe get monetized. But but after that,
you watch this episode like shit,do you have only the notification for
this and then everything else you detach, go ground out outside and go for
a walk. Well regardless, like, that's why I to push the things
that I do. And it seemslike you're kind of going the same way

(01:03:04):
in a very very similar way.Is you see how I will bounce off
of mental health and kind of touchit and be like, okay, this
will question me on it a lot. This show from the beginning was always
something to kind of enlighten people fromother people's experiences and bring other people on
and give their stories and stuff likethat and kind of touch on those things.

(01:03:25):
Anyway. This could be something regardlessof how disconnected you are from the
Internet, it will be something thatwill be impactful, just like comedy shows
and stuff like that that will bringyou up and enlighten you and make you
a better person by telling you dumblittle things like okay, well, explore
your fucking thoughts, you fucking retard. There are more to your thoughts than

(01:03:47):
just he he joke, Mash them, squash them, put them in a
stew. You can you could tella more eloquent joke than just turning something
into stew. It could be afar joke or a nut joke, and
I bet you it's probably better andat least it shows more about your personality
than just like trying to farm whateveryou think is for the points instead whatever
you want to say or be.And that's the hard part is like I

(01:04:12):
like looking at so many Reddit threadsbecause of that reason. We were talking
about this just before the show.Oh well when when I when I watch
pKa, I love hearing him Ithe assholes or Patreon stories or stuff like
that. I love that too becauseit brings me back to those days of
fucking male Monday, where it's justlike a conversation with somebody who's going to
give you actual advice, which iswhy I read these things and I'm like,

(01:04:35):
fuck man, I just want totell you to fucking do better and
do better this way, because likethat, that was how I fixed myself,
regardless of how long it took,those steps of this is how you
do this, and this is whatyou need to do because it didn't have
that fucking guide That's how I fixmyself. And I'm sure that you're probably

(01:04:56):
rather similar. Oh you kind ofget that guidebook of these little dumb things,
even if it's one little thing here, or you do this to fix
this, you will get something andthat something might be impactful, Like regardless
of this, the people that messagedme and told me, oh, I
fucking helped them through something, evenif those were fucking memes and jokes,
I don't care. I don't care. I've been told, oh you fucking

(01:05:20):
helped me through something fucking matters.Yeah. Uh. I think a big
thing is just the awareness of it, because there's that fucking bullshit meme,
like, but you choose to livein a society. It's like, but
you still choose to be online andmake content, so you're a hypocrite,
Like, no, it's not thatyou just need to like be aware of
your interactions. I've been against socialmedia since like twenty eleven. While I

(01:05:42):
was watching friends gone to them likewhy do you why why are you so
narcissistic already that you need a Twitterand you need to broadcast your like what
you're doing and what you're trying togo out and do. Now it became
more about like social media and PRand marketing, but before that was what
was the point, and then alot of other things and interactions like that
where if you're like admit, like, oh I doom scroll too much,

(01:06:02):
if you admit a problem with somethingyou're doing and it's internet based, why
are you doing it? People arejust stuck in their own shit like that.
The one that really drives me crazyis when you apologize for something and
you say, hey, I'm sorryfor that doesn't fucking mean a damn thing.

(01:06:23):
M That is what you teach akindergartener. That is what I'm teaching
my four year old. I'm sorry, and you apologize for what you did
and you try and do better.How you actually apologize when you're an adult
is you say I'm sorry for this. This is how I plan on improving

(01:06:44):
it in the future. This iswhat I'm going to change if it's something
that's tangentially needing to change. Likeif you offend somebody, you shouldn't fucking
apologize why because it doesn't fucking matter. You're a little pussy, You're a
retard. But if we have aneloquent conversation and I fucking slap you because
I fall over, I'm going toapologize and say I'm sorry for slapping you

(01:07:08):
when I fell over. Next time, I won't fail my arms like a
fucking retard. Like you give thatextra level of apologizing and understanding, and
that's what an adult does. Ithink it's problems delayed gratification, Like everyone
wants their gratification now, they wantthe result now, but no, an
apology is something that takes time togo through, where it's like the next

(01:07:29):
opportunity you had to fuck up,you don't because it showed you learn and
you were genuinely sorry from what happenedthe previous time. And it seems like
a lot of relationships are showing menthat number one, nobody gives a fuck
about the problems that they've caused.So when somebody says they're sorry, they're
sorry because they want you to shutthe fuck up. Sorry, I got

(01:07:50):
sorry. Yep, I'm sorry.I got caught. And nobody understands that
when you change something and you apologizeand you try and fix something, that
you fixing something is hard. Thatrespect of trying to fix something, even
when it is hard, should bethe most important part of it. It's

(01:08:13):
the trying to fix it. Youshould be understanding and accept that somebody is
trying to change something. But somany people are so dead set on what
you fucked up there for. Idon't care anymore. I don't care.
You will never change, you willalways be the same. You will always
be narcissistic, you will always bea piece of it. And this is
exactly why so many people just wantto throw around the words narcissists, because

(01:08:39):
everybody wants to say, oh,well, you only give a fuck about
what you think. That's not anarcissist, you retart. It's not what
I do is going to be themost important thing to me, because it's
the things that I do and Ichange the world with, regardless of how
small that is, regardless of whoI am, those are always going to

(01:09:02):
be the big things. Yeah,going back to like because you can't lead
with it, Yeah that I can't. Oh I can't cut up the big,
big point right there. But goingback to like the all the doom
scrolling and posting and like falling intothat. Another trend I caught onto back
in like twenty twelve twenty thirteen waswhen every comic was about depression, where

(01:09:24):
it's just kind of like, aha, I'm depressed, and then they make
a joke on everyone shares and goes, aha, this is so me.
It's like that's just making you moredepressed, that's just fueling that cycle inside
of your head, and then youself diagnose, and then you self diagnose
or get overdiagnosed with like autism orADHD, and then we've we had this
discussion like in a much earlier episode. I still think like ninety percent of
it, a lot of people arejust like falling into and creating it for

(01:09:45):
themselves. And that's not just detachedfrom the Internet and it all goes away.
It's not hard to validate that.Like, you know, three years
ago, I was diagnosed with suicidalideation. Every single problem, suicide was
an answer. And that's why I'mso open and vulnerable about it because i
don't care anymore. I'm disconnected enoughfrom it and I've healed enough from it

(01:10:09):
to the point where it's no longeran answer just to run. And everybody's
going to be like, oh,well, that's a piece of shit thing
to say. It's wrong to saythat. It's selfish to think about suicide
or want to attend. You allknow the fucked up thing. It is
selfish. It's selfish saying that everysingle part of my pain needs to go

(01:10:31):
on every single person that I'm goingto hurt when I'm no longer here.
You are avoid you have power,you have all of the strength that you
could have in this world if youjust give it up because you feel like,
you know, I don't want todo this. Okay, you don't
want to do this, But wouldyou rather have your mom feel that pain?
Would you rather your dad feel thatpain? Your kids feel that pain,

(01:10:55):
your best friend feel that pain?You want them to carry that pain
the rest of their life. Andthat's that's what that doc shows you.
That's why I said you need totell people what they what you feel about
them before they pass, because thatpain that happens when somebody dies or somebody
kills themselves or whatever, that is. Yeah, even if they just like

(01:11:15):
die in a car wreck, it'slike, shit, I didn't tell them
that thing that they needed to hear. Fuck, that's just gonna hault me.
Now it's irreparable. You. Thenthen you develop the most most toxic
fucking thing, something that I developedat four years old. You develop why
wasn't it me who died? Theycould have lived? They were more important?

(01:11:39):
Why didn't they they mattered more?Why not? Mm hmm. If
you develop that, you just fuckingget hurt. Everything becomes validation of why
it should have been them because youdidn't say how you cared because you didn't

(01:11:59):
say how you felt because you weretoo busy doom scrolling, because you're too
busy, fucking so obsessed with yourthoughts and feelings about something else. You
didn't tell somebody, Oh, Ilove you. Drive safe regardless of if
they're a dipshit and drive like aretard or not. Yeah, or you
get mad at them when you like, don't go to bed angry, don't

(01:12:21):
like the last time you see someone, don't be pissed off at them,
try to resolve shit. The peoplethat make you innately angry in this world
should be less than the people thatmake you semi smirk on a daily basis.

(01:12:41):
I hate three people to the pointwhere I would wish them dead.
Three people, I've got a numberaround that range. But you know how
many uniquely people make me smile orgiggle or fucking laugh on a daily,
fucking basis. It's not fucking complicatedto just be a lighthearted person enough to

(01:13:01):
know that, hey, it's okay. You don't have to be angry.
You don't have to just be upyour own ass the entire time and just
validate all of your feelings because you'remad today. You don't have to.
You don't have to be but hurtMcGee. You don't have to be dpresso
espresso, no upset ea spaghetti.You don't need any of that shit.

(01:13:27):
Such dad talk. I'm really temptedto create fucking characters and release them on
T shirts. Well we get ourmerchant shelf soon right on the channel,
we already have it, then fuckingdo it. We could use the money.
I just I don't want to releaseshit, and I don't like kind
of just thought dumping everything because Ifeel like I'm an obnoxious asshole that has

(01:13:51):
fifteen million, EIGHTYHD ideas that areall shit. Yeah, but a I
is already doing it and it's working. You just make like some AI OnlyFans
cash money, make an AI children'sbook cash money. Oh interesting thing about
that. So dude contacted me onLinkedIn. He's like, Zach, I

(01:14:15):
want to follow you. I reallylike your podcast. I have this weird
AI that I've created, probably didn'tcreate, but whatever that takes an interview
that I do with you and writesa book out of it and then publishes
it to Amazon and then creates obviouslya book an autobiography for you that you're

(01:14:38):
going to sell. I was like, that is fucking fantastic. That is
a great fucking way to just beable to turn out massive amounts of content
for literally no effort, just speakinglike that. Fuck, that's cool.
Well, like that's fucking interesting.I was like, I want to hear

(01:15:00):
more about this, because you know, I've been offered ted talks, I've
offered I've been offered all of thesethings. When do I do something because
there's something here with all of thisshit. There's something here with all of
these interesting fucking stories. How manypeople have hundreds of fucking stories from their
childhood that last twenty minutes, notvery fucking many, let alone people that

(01:15:23):
will tell them mm hmm, orhave the unique details of this car color
and this thing happened, and thenthis thing happened, and then I almost
fucking died. Nobody nobody has thatshit. Yeah, nine was either not
that eventful or my memory is notthat good. As far as I'm concerned,
I just appeared one day in frontof kindergarten, like, I don't

(01:15:45):
have any memories before then, andthen I'm kind of here now I have
memories all the way up and timetwo. Hold on hold on, well,
I'll tell you that other than otherthan my origin story. Let's see,
So the number two story, Iam literally two three, I'm like

(01:16:08):
two and a half four, I'mthree and a half. Like pulling up
the Zach story list, you choosefor once, you're always asking someone else
to choose. I don't. Idon't like choosing because as a whole,
who the fuck like? Doesn't thatseem rather narcissistic? Like I have ten

(01:16:28):
stories before I'm before I'm six andgoing to kindergarten, and I probably have
like ten or twelve more that Icould come up with, Like my grandma's
death is not in here, likethe actual just the story of the day,
because I remember the entire day ofwhen my grandma passed. I have
the entire day memorized. This episode'salready so fucking heavy. I don't need

(01:16:50):
number nine grandma dying and recurring nightmares. That's a skip. Oh yeah,
I guess it is there. Butyeah, but like as a whole,
there's there's so many things like that. But it's just like, how many
people genuinely have that many memories beforekindergarten. Most people don't even remember kindergarten.
They don't remember anything before the fuckingmiddle school. All right, let's

(01:17:11):
do getting lied to about food.Actually, we'll put that one, because
I think there's one more story wecan come over. Yeah, yeah,
let's let's do the school absences becauseI can lead into a story about being
absent so much because I had thesame thing, and then we could go
into a story or whatever. Yeah. See, that was the thing where
it's like you brought up like Ican go off for twenty minutes and like

(01:17:32):
we still got forty in the episode, exactly exactly. We're good. So
I don't have the link for theschool absences thing because it was higher up
on the thing. But so youyou brought up this story on a discord
where there is a drastic or massiveincrease in school absences and stuff like that.

(01:17:53):
Do you have the link? No, I thought you were scrolling for
it right now. Nope. Ikind of got you. I got you.
It was one of those like it'sjust what those zoomer things. So
I'm just like, all the youngergenerations are so screwed. I have no
credit for them. They deserved tome flamed. No one's trying, and
it's not because society's bad because like, you just have to put in the
effort. Actually, one thing Iwas going to correct you on. So

(01:18:13):
you were like, oh, Ibet this is you as a creative person
that you felt like trapped in yourjobs and whatever. No, I was
the complete opposite. I knew thateighteen nineteen twenty. I don't have anything
to contribute. I am just agrunt and I'm going to grunt my way
into saving thousands of dollars and thenmaybe I figure something out. So I
was happy. I was like,I've never had money before, I grew
up poor. So no, butyou had a goal of trying to figure

(01:18:36):
out how to make more after youhad it. Yeah, they don't have
That is what my po was like, you're a creative person that has an
end goal or I'm going to fi. I didn't feel trapped though. I
was just like, this is themeans to an end. If I have
to work sixty to eighty hours aweek to achieve this, that's fine because
I never had money before. Yougive my first pay check one hundred twod

(01:18:57):
douars. No, what am Igoing to do one hundred twoy dollars?
No? I felt the same waywith a lot of things. That's why
I said, at some point youprobably did feel that burnout in the construction
of Okay, now I'm kind ofconfined to I have to do this thing
because this thing's paying the bills.Nope, but you didn't have the level
of kids and everything else I did, which probably impacted it a little bit
more. For me, exactly,mine was a So I was just like,

(01:19:21):
no matter how much it takes,I'm just going to keep going until
it's done. And if it takesto like mid twenties, kids are just
getting out of high are not athigh school out of college at that point,
they were going to still have towork at Starbucks and McDonald's with their
degree while they look for what theirjob is. I'm ahead, and I
just kept going like, no matterwhat, I'm ahead, no matter how
much I have to work, andI'll keep going and I will end up
successful. And that's prevented burnout evenuntil now. The only thing that sucks

(01:19:45):
is dislike bodding. Please, forthe love God, someone's uncle at Google
save me. So the link thatyou sent was blocked because of fucking having
to pay for the New York Times, But I do have The image says
school absences have exploded almost everywhere.The pandemic changed families' lives and the culture
of education. Our relationship with schoolbecame optional. And every time before twenty

(01:20:12):
twenty everything was in between fifteen tothirteen percent of absences chronic absenteeism, which
is marked as ten percent of theschool year, and currently within twenty twenty
two and twenty twenty three that isin between twenty eight and twenty six percent
of students, so it's doubled yep, So that is fifteen days at least

(01:20:35):
in New York. I assume mostplaces are about one hundred and fifty to
one hundred and eighty school days.So were there times that you missed fifteen
to eighteen school days consistently or wereyou one of those kids where you were
just like there all the time andyou didn't you just did it because you
had the well one, my familydidn't give me a choice. Like school

(01:20:56):
was on the way to the work, so you were getting thrown in the
car and you were going in unlessyou were dying and on that, Like
I also just kind of like eventhough I hate to school, like everyone
hates school. But now with thesekids that like they can't function, they
have no social capabilities and stuff,and they think the world's ending in twenty
years because of climate or the economyor Trump. They're already cooked. I
was just like, look, thissucks. I'm smarter than everyone. I'll

(01:21:19):
learn what I can, and youjust gotta be here, just gotta do
it. So that whole I'm smarterthan everybody thing hit me really really hard
in like fourth and fifth grade,and I stopped caring because everything was just
easy. It was just the wholeburnout kind of I don't give a fuck

(01:21:40):
anymore shit. And then it gotreally bad because I started suffering massive,
massive abuse by the hands of mydad and I developed severe PTSD. Not
like wanting to do anything, itwas just I wanted to kind of be
happy for once, because I wasdealing with suicidal ideation up until ten eleven

(01:22:04):
and then dealing with massive PTSD ontop of that. I kind of just
became very shut in and I kindof just wanted to do what I wanted
to do. At that point,it was like I'm disconnecting from everything.
So my absences in fourth grade wasprobably around like thirty or so, which
is I was part of the statisticat that point, Well, I mean

(01:22:26):
bad home situations. I think that'sthe baseline. That's like the baseline ten
percent, But now it's gone upbecause of kids. Just like, Eh,
I'm on my phone and everyone's tollingme it's fucked anyways, why should
I be here? But this iswhere it got worse. That fifth and
sixth grade. I missed sixty twodays and sixty seven days across those two
years, which would be thirty percentof the school year thirty three percent of

(01:22:51):
the school year, depending on obviouslyhow many absences and days you would have
guaranteed regardless, So if it's onefifty or one AD, it would kind
of change that up. But like, that's where that shit gets hard.
Is like if you legitimately look atthat of Okay, that's bad. I
understand that what is it mental illnessis actually getting worse because we're not pushing

(01:23:14):
people to be the best version ofthem now. Now they're kind of becoming
burnout and disillusioned of everything's falling apartanyway, I don't have the power to
change things now. We've kind ofcompletely disconnected the individual to everything. These
are completely capable kids, Yeah,exactly, like, and I see that
with my kids, like my daughter, she's the oldest, and I went

(01:23:39):
in for her IEP because she hasADHD and everything else, and they're like,
yeah, she she moved here andshe's absolutely destroying everything. Like she
was involving herself the first day ofschool, Like regardless of if she knew
what the book was that we weretalking about or anything, she was still
a part of the class. Shecared. That's what fucking matters is that

(01:24:00):
she's there and she's present and she'savailable. That's the entire fucking thing.
Wait, why is that the situation? Why is being present the answer?
Like, fuck, everybody is sodisconnected that just being present and available in
a part of the class is thepart of disillusion. That is the fucking

(01:24:21):
standard. What the fuck? Ithink? That also goes like back to
telling people what you think before passingwords like just fucking praise people and the
mental illness goes away. Affirmations aregood, but it's like everybody's so afraid
of narcissists and it's like motherfucker gettingpraise only when they do something, only

(01:24:46):
only when there is oh, I'mdoing something I need to do, Okay,
so don't get praise for that.Don't get praised for something you need
to do. No, I thinkyou're still doing it, Like you're like,
hey, you did good job togive the things doing a good job,
ye, the baseline things. Butwhen they go above and beyond,
you give, you give. It'sa fucking complex. It's not fucking hard.

(01:25:12):
And you want like you want arised up kid, you want a
rised up personality. You need anego or else you get crumbled on by
everything else. No, And that'sexactly what happened to me. Was like
I remember when I was four orfive, six, and it went all
the way up until I was sixteen. I remember my mom telling me,
oh, you're just an egotistical sonof a bitch, Like you're like you're
like your grandfather. That's going tobe the reason why you suffer. That's

(01:25:36):
going to be the reason why you'rean asshole. And it's like, Mom,
that ego is the thing that ismaking me the person that I am
like. And I told her thisprobably like you know, six seven months
ago. I was like you neversay that. Where am I now?
Mm hmmm? Where that's the gothat ego that that person that I was

(01:26:00):
trying to be the exaggerated version ofZach. If I didn't learn to put
that mask on. Do you knowhow much better I am at my job
now because I don't fucking second guessmyself when I go to say a joke.
I don't second guess myself when Iget all anxious and upity and having
fun and lighthearted. That shit changes. You don't have the mask. I

(01:26:25):
was like, Mom, that maskmakes my life hard. Do you have
to bring me down to, likehumble me a little bit? Yeah?
But I grew up poor. Whatfucking ego do I have other than self
like me going out and grinding anddoing the things that I need to do.
Guess what it's what I'm gonna needto do. And having some level

(01:26:50):
of confidence, some level of selfconfidence or the availability to kind of just
be a human is step one.Yeah, And there's so much projection of
lack of self confidence where it's likeyou're not even confid enough to answer food,
like to order your own food,calling me a narcissist because I actually
can function and I believe in myselflike people just don't believe in themselves.

(01:27:13):
And a lot of it is likebad family situations, cause that's when I'm
like, when I started watching JordanPeterson and they're talking about like these childhood
traumas or like the shitty little waysyour parents knock you down, it's like
you get childhood that you're fucked up, and I've experienced that. But then
you have choices where it's like,wait, you take off the mask and
realize now you just be you anda lot of your problems can go away.
No. And I was explaining thatsomebody literally yesterday and she was like,

(01:27:38):
yeah, well what is that?And I'm like, when you come
home from work, you're the sameperson that you were at work. You're
the same, You're the same always. If you have mental illness, especially
some sort of level of neurodivergency atall, you're told to be normal.

(01:27:58):
You're told to be this, toldto be that, you're told to act
this way, you're told to actthat way, and that level of disconnect
from who you actually are makes youso fucking tired that you just want to
disconnect so you don't talk. Iwas like, you know, when I
stop and I turn off that cameraand I turn off the fucking stream,

(01:28:19):
and I sit there and I'm allup at it, and then all of
a sudden, I stop talking.It's because I'm tired. I'm tired because
I finally was able to relieve thatmask of being normal and being fucking calm
and being level headed. That thereare some days where I can do that
all day, and then there aresome days where I'm just fuck, I

(01:28:42):
can't. I can't do this.Not because I'm not built for this,
not because I'm not built to bearound people and love being around people,
but there are some days where thatbattery of having to be normal for certain
people to feel comfortable, that shitmakes you feel fucking uncomfortable, and it
burns you out. And there areso many parents that just don't give a

(01:29:05):
fuck and will tell you I'll benormal, shut up, don't say anything,
don't do anything. You don't fuckingmatter. Children are to be seen
and not heard, And that shitfucking burns you out because you have fifty
million thoughts going through your head.I remember hearing this Gary Vee quote and

(01:29:28):
he's like, do you hate yourself? They're like, yeah, this is
how I feel. Who told youthat? Your mom or your dad?
Because every single one of those criticismsnormally comes from one of them. Normally
they're the same thing that they pickpeople at online too, it'll be their

(01:29:53):
downfall and they're picking at you forbeing very similar to them, or they're
they're just projecting what they're feeling aboutthemselves on you. Yep, it's just
like you didn't heal it. That'sall. That's all it is. You
didn't fucking heal the trauma that yourmom gave you, your dad gave you.
Well, this person didn't love metoday, so obviously I feel like

(01:30:15):
shit and it's just like, no, man, that's not how life needs
to be. It's not how itneeds to be at all. Yeah,
and I was able to preserve enoughmyself where I'm just like, you're wrong,
and I guess like I still haveto like it. At that point,
just became like working for a boss, we're just like, yeah,
you just do you do the chores. You try not to make them any

(01:30:36):
more angry at you, and thenyou just know who you are and you
don't let the internet dissipate and dissolveyou anymore. When I was when I
was that young, it was everybodykind of applauded being different, but only
when it was acceptable, so thatthat kind of gave me that like natural

(01:30:59):
role coaster of having to hide,hide, hide, and then all of
a sudden I can explode. Andthat caused massive fucking problems because I didn't
have that confidence to do it always, and that confidence to do it always
made me second guess everything. Sothen all of a sudden you fall in
your face because you can't you can'tfeel normal in any situation because you're second

(01:31:20):
guessing everything. It's like nobody genuinelyunderstands these kids unless you deal with it
too. And because you deal withit too, you've been told for the
past twenty years not to act likethat, and now you're relearning how to
do everything. It's it's it's sosurreal, and it's it's surreal to kind

(01:31:42):
of look at people who deal withthe things too, and they're like,
oh, no, that's not this, that's not that, that's not part
of this. It's not a partof that, and they want to write
it off as something just not beingnormal and not being okay, instead of,
you know, just giving them thegrace of understanding that everybody's kind of
slightly different, everybody's not fucking normal. The standards of everybody's fucking quiet in

(01:32:06):
the restaurant isn't fucking normal. Youcan have a conversation even if you're a
little bit loud, who fucking cares, But you have a little dipshit over
there that can't fucking say what theywant because of their social anxiety. Yeah,
I just had a realization, likebecause the big thing is like you

(01:32:26):
gotta watch people like Jordan Peterson.You gotta understand what the problems are in
your life. And also like thebiblical allegories are so fucking good when you
understand it's like this is human nature. The more you understand about human nature,
the demons out there, real ormanifested or imaginary, like you have
to confront them at some point somehow, And there's a lot of ways that

(01:32:48):
that ends up happening. But thenI was thinking about the fear, like
people have a fear of losing theexcuses. I think that's why it's like,
oh, I just I'm just toldto hate Jordan Peterson because I've already
become one with the social media.I've amalgamated into this like nastiness. So
it's like I'm not I can't losethat. For some reason I can't lose
the tribe that's dissolving me, andI can't confront my problems because other people

(01:33:14):
are telling me these problems like itjust helps you out so much. Well,
then you search for the level ofconsistency and comfort. Well of consistency
and comfort is I've always hated thisperson, and there are thousands of people
that hate this and it's easier tohave the excuse. It's easier to say,
oh, I am depressed and it'ssomething that will affect me. You

(01:33:38):
can't do anything about it. Sorry, and bitch of people like Andrew Tate
saying, oh, yeah, youknow, I don't believe in depression.
Do you want to know why?He says he doesn't believe in depression because
he doesn't want to give something thatis out of his control the power to
affect and dictate his life. Thatis health, not mental illness. Oh

(01:34:00):
dude, my friends hate me forthat. It's like I am one of
those dudes that just like, justdon't get depressed. Like sure it doesn't
work for everyone, but it surehell works for me. Where it's just
like, just don't get depressed.Do you do the thing that with like
sicknesses like semi sicknesses, not likeI'm dead in bed, but like,
oh I have a cold or allergiesand I can push through this. Oh,

(01:34:21):
I do psychotic shit to break that. Yeah, So what I do
is so I get the u thailanolextreme flu medicine. It's like euthanasia blue
and I take two and a halfthree doses. Like I just I just
pound that. Oh absolutely, notlike I said, this is psychotic shit.
But then I just do that.I go to sleep for like sixteen

(01:34:44):
hours. Haven't been sick in years? Oh I did that when I had
VID. I had body aches andI am migrating to the point where I
couldn't move and I just slept forthree days. I think when I got
COVID, like it was one ofthese things where I lost taste and smell
and I fell achy and stuff,and I didn't get it tested by just
I was like, you know whatI need. I need to give my

(01:35:04):
body what it needs to beat this. I can't force I can't do anything.
Did my medicine routine twenty four hoursof in bed, did not leave
bed for twenty four hours except apiss, and I was better. So
I think, like in a way, It's like, yeah, I do.
Will that to just being better,even when it comes to sicknesses.
Take a lot vitamin D, takezinc. Make sure you're nutrition. I've

(01:35:24):
got a fucking stack. I takemy lock and load fish oil, multi
vitamins, and a couple other secretsauce things. Feeling great always pressure at
real it's crazy, and it's noteven that it's real or not. We
also have a dog to walk.I'm fit. You. You legitimately can
affect the way your mind and bodyare affected by things. How much breaks

(01:35:47):
how much you tell yourself you acceptit. If you are a person that
says that you are sick, youwill always be sick. If you are
a person that says that you're mentallyill, you will always be mentally ill.
Which is the exact reason why whenyou're addicted to alcohol, drugs,
or something like that and they tellyou to go to rehab, the first

(01:36:09):
thing they tell you, oh,I am once an addict, I am
always an addict. And I've toldso many people I was like, I
disagree with that. I disagree withthat entirely. The thing that that does
is take it take the responsibility ofmy choices, my impulses my demons,
well, your demons, not me. I've never been fucking addicted to anything

(01:36:29):
other than video games, caffeine.When you look at those things and they're
like, oh me, me,me, me, take it off of
me, give it to give itto God, you have no accountability.
You are not accountable for any ofyour decisions. It creates the problem again,
that's all it does. You knowwhere that is on social media.

(01:36:54):
You know where that is on socialmedia in their bios. They affirm it
in their bios. That's the thing, Like you're not allowed to make fun
of bios anymore. You can't say, like, oh, check out the
bio when you're trying to grill someone. But then as ones like they have
affirmed all those things that they wantto to like be wrong with themselves,
like if you're depressed and you wanthelp make yourself feel better, don't put

(01:37:18):
I'm depressed in my bio, aswell as like mentally ill, ADHD,
autistic, all these things like ifyou have ADHD, that is a thing
that is tangentially like chemically and physicallywrong. Saying I have depression is not
a thing. It is a feeling, and feelings you can change and effect.

(01:37:41):
If you have borderline personality disorder,or if you have bipolar disorder,
you could have manic depression, whichis a real thing that is chemically and
physically wrong with you because you area traumatized person. There are different things.
I'm not talking about people that areactually traumatized and affect buy something because
those things you can affect, youcan put those things into remission. But

(01:38:03):
the thing is is if you don'tdo the things and affect them the way
that you would if you were okay, you're never going to get me able
to get past them if you actuallydo have a trauma. See that's where
we had that discussion last year.And also I do make the concessions like,
yeah, there's there's a ninety somethingpercent where it's actually serious, but

(01:38:25):
I think it's over diagnosed, overmedicated, all these other based things that people
say. But it's like, justdon't inflict it on yourself and you will
get better. Even if it islike a major medical thing. Don't inflict
on yourself and it will improve.No matter what, I dealt with undiagnosed
ADHD until I wash twenty six.It was diagnosed at twenty seven. It

(01:38:48):
was medicated to twenty eight, I'vehad the two most successful years of my
life actually understanding how to affect itand use it to my advantage, not
consuming fourteen hundred milligrams of caffeine minimumdaily. Isn't that weird? Not?

(01:39:08):
Actually just you know, keeping itin my hands and understanding, you know,
I don't give a fuck about itwhatever, and actually understanding how to
use it and affect it and healingfucking mental illness. It's weird, But
then if you like you can't useit as an excuse. Maybe if you

(01:39:29):
heal things that are negative, youwill feel better about life instead of bitching
and complaining about them. Weird,isn't it? Yeah, let's hear about
you getting getting lied to about food, because I actually have a story with
that. I grew up vegetarian becausesince we were poor, every food tasted
like shit, so I only caredfor like but butter noodles and mac and
cheese and peanut butter and jelly.So my family's like, you gotta eat

(01:39:50):
meat, you gotta do that,and they were always trying to like sneak
meat under my pasta and stuff.I'd taste it and I hate it,
or like then I'd have to likedig through my food to the shit they're
trying to like may be uncomfortable everything, and then like instead of actual nutrition,
it's just flintstone vitamins and shit.So it's like, oh that that
wasn't going too well, and it'swell, it's like yeah, like that's

(01:40:13):
where childhood trauma comes from, andyou have to figure out how to deal
with it when you're being lied to. I was told I was getting vegetarian
hot dogs. Guess what I wasn't. And it's not like I was trying
to make some kind of stand likeI care about the animals, so I'm
vegetarian. No, I just didn'tlike it. Get low quality shit,
yeah, and I just didn't wantto be like leg yeah. And that's
like I love meat now, Ilove a steak. We just didn't have

(01:40:35):
it. And then like, fine, I'll eat a hot dog. I
choked it down if it was vegetarianham or whatever, but don't lie to
me about it. And then likeI get told that when I'm like when
it's like, oh, you eatchicken now, because I didn't eat chicken.
I didn't eat fish. I onlywanted like veggies and noodles because that
was the only thing that yeah,whatever whatever ended up happening from that.
But and the it's like and theneventually I just get told it's like,

(01:40:58):
oh, you're chicken now. Yeah, those hot dogs were just ham and
they were never vegetarian. It's like, cool, thanks for lying to me
about food. No. I hada lot of the same things, much
like you. It was. Icalled myself vegetarian because that's what everybody said
I was. I would eat chickennuggets and hot dogs and that's it.
I would just have cheese roll upsat Taco Bell. That was no.

(01:41:19):
I'm saying, like as far asMico's, like, that's the only things
I would eat me, Like,I didn't even have chicken sandwiches nuggets.
I was like fifteen fourteen. Buta lot of the stuff that I dealt
with was a lot of texture thingslike it smells, texture, like anything
that was kind of different from thethings that I would eat at that time.

(01:41:40):
It got weird and I didn't likeit. Like I loved Campbell's chicken
noodle soup, which is kind ofa really weird, odd texture to kind
of hone in on. But thatwas the thing I called it fish soup.
I was a fucking year and ahalf old, two years old,
and that's what my grandma gave me. Always. It was that or spaghettios.
But she made try I ate.She made sure that everything was done
and taken care of. But astime went on, they tried to expand

(01:42:06):
what I ate and expand what Iwhat I would accept and stuff like that.
It definitely grew, but it causedme to regress a lot as well,
and kind of now that I'm lookingat it, I can kind of
pick apart and be like, okay, well that's why I absolutely cannot stand
these textures or smells or anything likethat. So I had a pinpoint of

(01:42:31):
like when it changed, When didyours change? Food wise? Like where
like you probably can draw a lineof like, okay, before this point,
I only ate these things. Afterthis point I kind of opened up
a little bit and it changed.It was more gradual, where like I
fish, like I love fishing,but it would be the thing like like
I catch fish and then I wouldn'teat it because I was just like,

(01:42:53):
fish is bad. The last timeI had a fish, it was that
freezer burnt fish stick that made thatI don't eat meat. So I also
got my head where it's like,well, I guess I am just a
vegetarian and I wasn't meant to meator any fish or anything like that.
But I started I'm like, holyshit, this is delicious. And then
I was like, let's try chicken. Let's actually have like good fried chicken.
I love it too. I thefirst time I had like a burger,

(01:43:14):
though I think I was nineteen,I was still like off the because
like begdolligence looks fucking gross. Idon't want real meat just didn't exist in
my mind. In my all thatstuff very very similar things. So like
uh six seven, I would fishand I would try things here and there
and just like touch it and belike okay, am I am I okay
like this like yeah, oh Ihave the big revelation. The big revelation

(01:43:39):
was realizing fish isn't supposed to taketaste fishy. Yeah, like that means
you have bad fish. If youget panfish or like salmon that you catch
yourself or whatever, that's fucking sofucking good compared to the shit that you
buy at the store. It's justdifferent. But like I remember going fishing
with my Grandpa, or going fishingwith my dad at the time, and
just kind of really that I wasokay there, but only okay in those

(01:44:02):
situations, like I'm okay to eatthis, and that kind of switched.
It made me question. So wewent duck hunting one time and we were
in a rowboat, and we rowedout, went duck hunting for like two
or three hours, and then wentback and I looked at him and said,
Dad, what are we having fordinner? He's like, well,

(01:44:23):
we're helping spaghetti. I was like, can we can we put some other
duck in there? Because I wantto try it, just like finally willing
to try something, just because youknow that's what you're saying, what we're
having. Yeah, And I don'tremember what he lied to me with,
it might have been that. Andhe put beef in their like meatballs or

(01:44:43):
something like that, and I lostit because I still to this day,
I don't buy ground beef because Ican't get past the texture. I don't
like burgers, especially when other peoplecook them, like I can get past
it. I can get past itwhen I ok but anybody else I don't.
I don't like it. I thinkthat was what did it for me

(01:45:04):
where I was just like, Idon't like ground beef, and like all
the shitty burger patties and the discountWalmart ground beef, theliging shit. It's
like I had that as a kid. I was just like, oh,
I guess I hate all meat forever. This is not good. And then
like that, you just just committo it, because like if you go
twelve thirteen years without eating chicken orfish, kind I want to keep that

(01:45:26):
streak going. So at that pointI kind of started reaching out and kind
of trying things. And I wasabout like ten eleven at this point.
My mom ended up buying steaks onme and I was like, hey,
I'll try it. I put thefoot forward. She's like, you tried
this, and I think I thinkshe said duck and I ended up being
beef or something like that, orit was deer and it was supposed to

(01:45:46):
be it was something. It wasa weird meat instead of a normal meat,
and it was it was actually beef. And she's like, well,
you tried this, why don't youtry steak. You might like steak zac
and she overcooked me a fucking cheapass steak and I was like, I
don't. I don't like this texture. And she's like, hey, try

(01:46:10):
it with Italian dressing. Try itwith Italian dressing. I didn't really like
that. She's like, hey,put a one's steak sauce on it.
Tried it like that. I didn't, just didn't didn't like it, Like
I like, I might like thisif it was done differently. What is
it about? Like boomers and genX and just not being able to make
food. So my mom was reallyweird because my grandma had emphysema and problems

(01:46:34):
with her heart and stuff. Shewas told her entire childhood that they couldn't
use salt. So my mom hadno idea genuinely how to make the food
other than like certain things that werelike comforts for her that she taught herself.
So as I learned and I taughtmyself how to do things, a
lot of my critiques or comments andstuff, she took the heart instead of

(01:46:59):
listening to what I'm saying because itwasn't a comfort thing mhm. But once
I showed her like skill wise,I knew what I was doing, she
was like, oh, and it'sclicked, and now she eats my food
and she's like fuck, You're oneof the best cooks that I've seen,
which is weird because my sister wentfor culinary and stuff like that. I
was going to go for culinary,which, after you know, not eating

(01:47:21):
meat all this time, it wasweird. But yeah, it got really
weird because then after that, Itried a burger for the first time,
and I threw up for three daysstraight because I was just grossed out.
Like I was like, nope,nope, nope, none of this,
none of this. I'm fucked,I'm done, And it pushed me back
like I was like chicken nuggets,only I don't I don't want any of

(01:47:41):
this. I stopped eating pot roast. I stopped eating all that shit,
Like I went completely back. Iwas like, no soups, no nothing,
just chicken. That's the only thingI trust right now. But like,
yeah, I still struggle with thosethings. I still struggle with ground
beef. I don't eat it atall. Anything that is ground that is
gross. I'd rather have chopped likeactual fibrous chicken instead of it being like

(01:48:04):
ground that's gross to me. Like, if I'm gonna have to know what
you need, you need to goto smash burger that fucking favorite burger or
just get a smash burger in general, I think that could be the point.
The only place that I've been ableto order a burger out and like
it. I've had two that I'veliked out of all of them that I've
tried five guys where I'm able toput the toppings into specifically, say five

(01:48:28):
guys and that way. I likedthat because obviously it's kind of a texture
thing. You can bounce more peppersand onions and stuff like that and it
kind of changes the texture a bit. And then also I had a Wendy's
uh mushroom and mozzarella burger or somethinglike that was on the one Yes,

(01:48:49):
Yeah, that's it's good. Alright. I sobbed out the Swiss for mozzarella
or something like that and that waspretty good. I got barbecue sauce on
that and that was acceptable. Butthose are the only two burgers that I've
had out where I'm like, yeah, that that's good. I'm okay with
this. Everything else has been kindof like a disconnect. I'm like,
what the fuck is this? Idon't understand why people eat burgers. It

(01:49:13):
makes me feel like, honestly,I don't understand why, if the options
are a steak for fourteen dollars anda burger for twelve, why you're going
for a burger and a beer insteadof a soda and a steak. I
don't understand the disconnect here. Idon't under like I'm not even trying to
be snotty about it, Like Idon't understand why you are so dilluted to

(01:49:35):
that point where you're like, thisburger is better. Like I don't understand
how people are like burgers are thebest food ever. I don't fucking get
it. Mayonnaise is the same fuckingthing to me. Mayonnaise fucking disgusting.
I can't I'm down with mayonnaise.Can't do Wait, no, I can't
do mustard. Yeah, I'm downwith mayonnaise. Can't do mustard. Mustard

(01:49:57):
makes me mustard either. Can't domustard either way too, everything like the
strong sense of those things get meevery time, the other thing that used
to make me extremely sick as soonas my mom would start cooking them.
So she cooks two dishes from herchildhood that are kind of like her thing
of like, I love this thing, so I keep it around. One

(01:50:18):
of them was corn beef and cabbage. She would have it for her birthday,
which is near Saint Patrick's day,and it's kind of the thing.
The other thing. I don't evenknow if this is what it's named,
but it's called hulishki, which isessentially the same exact thing as corn beef
and cabbage, except it's not cornbeef. It's ham and it can be
fried or steamed just like corn beef, except it's not like a soup.

(01:50:42):
And the cabbage and ham and thosesmells turn my stomach every single fucking time
I could see that just I don'tknow if it's just the strong smell or
what it is or what is goingon with it, but it catches me
every single fucking time. Yep,I was gonna say like other things about
food, because it's also not justlike oh they don't know how to season

(01:51:05):
and salt, Like the steak isalways overdone, the chicken always comes out
like rubber. It's not that difficult, but it ended up being difficult for
a lot of people to cook.Gen X just couldn't do it. It
seems like a lot of them didn'tlearn. Yeah, like they were all
kind of thrown to the wolves oftry and figure it out, and once

(01:51:26):
you kind of get comfortable with things, you don't change them. And whenever
somebody says, hey, do itthis way, you get butt hurt because
it's different from what you're expecting,even though what you're doing is bad.
Like I became a foodie from allthat, from vegetarian to like, yeah,
I fucking love everything. I canappreciate it, like, and I'll
even give things I hate a chanceuntil I know it's like not happening.
Like I tried with mustard. Itried with pickles. I'm like, maybe

(01:51:46):
I just need that high quality picklebecause this is my vegetarian met me too.
Yep, absolutely, I guess it'sjust the vinegar and the fermented like
mustard seed just can't deal. Yeah, but like I'll go through and off
fucking eat weird things like zucchini steiksor you know what I'm saying, Like
weird things on the other end,whether it's like some people don't get these
things because they can't get past thetexture or the smell of this thing where

(01:52:10):
they can get something else. Ijust think it's funny because it's like I
can I can deal with asparagus.I can deal with so many things that
so many people can't eat. Thereare just some things that fucking I guess
yeah. And then going back tolike you're thinking, like why does everyone
like burgers? And then like Iwill make food. Back when I lived
in Colorado and we had like roommatesand stuff, I had like Omaha steaks,

(01:52:33):
and I was like making good steaksand I'm making like a garlic butter
sauce from scratch. I make theroots, you melt, the butter,
you put in, the flour,you cream, and then all the other
stuff. And I'm like I'm gettingfancy with this shit. And then one
of the roommate comes over, pullsout a one steak sauce, just go
over it. I'm just like,you never learned how to eat, my

(01:52:54):
guy. And that's just like allthese other people with the burgers are like
paid sixteen dollars for a burger,Like I'll do it sometimes, Like give
me, give me like a chickenbacon ranch or any like ranch in the
caramelized onions and stuff on a burger, Like I can take that over stick.
Sometimes I will also understand when likepeople are just inting their food and

(01:53:14):
it does not make sense and it'sso sad. I don't know, man,
Guys, we are on the roadto a thousand subs. We are
so fucking close. We probably hitit by the end of this month,
and that will feel fucking fantastic.We gained one hundred and twenty thousand subscribers
last month. We had hundred andtwenty thousand subscribers, one hundred and twenty

(01:53:36):
subscribers. I'm a fucking retard.I was going into the next sentence.
I was gonna say we had onehundred and twenty thousand views last month just
on YouTube, and we're looking atbeating it this month. And we didn't
even upload the podcast last week.We got thirty five thousand views last week.
So thank you, guys, Thankyou all of you dipshits. I

(01:53:58):
have no idea where the fuck you'recoming from the fucking press. Subscribe,
show us that you'll love us,because we're fucking coming for you. Yeah,
get over like that. I wearcollar and just appreciate what we're saying,
and then share with all your friendsand then boom, we're viral.
Everyone's everyone's doing better exactly. We'llsee you fucking next time. See you
fucking later. Go use code rmtsat g fuel, use code verrulist FIA

(01:54:20):
G fuel. Whatever you guys decideto do, we'll see you fucking later. Goodbye,

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}The Fall Of Nickelodeon: The Teen Nick Iceberg | RMTS 139